One of the saddest things
in this strange world
is watching the person
you love crying
over someone else,
and all they wanted
you to do
is to just listen,
while they tell you
the reason why
I looked at him with so much admiration, I swear you could see the love pouring out of my eyes like waterfalls.
I could also swear to you that he looked at me like all of the other girls, just another body, just another face. I could swear to you that when he kissed me so hungrily like I was his last meal, I could swear to you I was not what he was craving.
I could swear to you that he means so much more to me than I will ever mean to him; and I could swear to you there is no substance in the entire world to numb that pain.
Unlike the books that I will literally write and commercially sell,
I only have one shot at writing the book of my life.
And in this book I can’t proofread or edit. I can’t have fancy covers to conceal the ugly contents.
The most horrifying thing is, I don’t get to decide how many chapters the book will contain.
I will never know which is the last one.
So I can’t have many cliffhangers. And I can’t be stuck on one chapter re-reading it multiple times before I am satisfied enough to move on.
i’ll never be
“the one that got away”
because you told me to leave
and i did
so what does that make me?
“the one who left”?
“the one who listened”?
“the one that wanted to stay”?
“the one that would still be here if you wanted me”?
”the one that’s still here even though you’re long gone” (cc, 2017)
Let me just tell you right now, before you decide to love me and then walk away, that I am too good at loving but I’m bad at being loved. I still find myself shaking over people who have stopped loving me and I cannot bear another person to the list.
Don’t love me just to leave me in the end. // 2amfilm.
you take my hand and you pull it to your lips and i’ve only ever touched your skin in the moonlight. please, my love, you say, and i can’t see you through tears but i think the moonlight’s sucking the color out of you, out of us, keep this secret for me. til death do you part – not you and i, but you and this quiet, this scandal we cradle between our ribcages.
you would be so much brighter in the sun! i cry, the loneliest wolf under the loneliest moon in the loneliest desert: dry, unquenched, roaming in search of what is out of its reach. you would laugh so much louder and smile so much wider! less like a dying star and more like a sunrise. less like a black hole and more like a rainbow. please, step into the morning hand in hand with me – we will make our way. we will teach the world the size of a love like ours.
darling, boys only kiss boys when even the moon is asleep and we are the only ones alive enough to know it. don’t tempt the fates when we already have one foot in the grave.
i want you to hold my hand when it’s bright – when the sun beats down and everything is blue and green and alive like summer. i want to kiss you and taste wildflowers instead of inky space. i am sick of the night, i am sick of the secret, i am sick of the dark. carry me into the sunshine.
he turns his face away and the moonlight slants onto his face in bars of silver and shadow. he can’t. and he can’t. and he can’t.
The love that animals have for us is unlike any other.
It truly is love in its purest form… They have no ulterior motives, they don’t use us or abuse us and they don’t play games with our hearts. When they love us – they love us utterly and completely as though we are the center of their universe…
And just as unique as their love is for us, so too is our love for them equally as special. They trust us implicitly – to care for them, feed them and never let them down… and in return, we trust them just as much… to never hurt us, never lie to us, to always be our constant loyal companion; This is the unspoken bond we share.
They truly are the best of us… tiny living vessels that hold a piece of our soul and carry it around with them wherever they go. They are the keystones of our family… We get them to fit in with our lifestyles, then ultimately end up changing our lifestyles to fit in around them as they inevitably become members of our family. Through triumph and tragedy, they’re our constant companions… They are our soulmates… the keepers of our heart… so like us, yet not like us at all… And though they bring with them great responsibility, they are never a burden simply because of the sheer joy they bring into our lives.
No matter your wealth, your status, your age or your gender – every soul on this earth is richer for having loved and been loved by an animal…
when i become a famous author, i will deadass make ao3 accounts under different emails and write fanfic of my own stuff. some of it will be amazing and you’ll wish it was canon. some of it will be shameless pandering to non-canon ships. some of it will be shitty. i’m gonna do this. you’ll never be able to prove what’s a legit fic and what’s me using yet another sock puppet. come at me.
I want to go back before the beginning, I want to experience after the end. I feel so terribly stuck in the middle, so full of almosts and kind ofs that I fear I will be suspended in shades of grey my whole life.
He didn’t beat me with his fists
But he did beat me with his words
The bruises weren’t on my body
But on my mind and soul
And engraved in my bones
No matter how much I tried
To erase it all
Our nature is engrained
within us, the trees know
what the deepest threads
of our soul needs to thrive.
When the mind is settled, open
we are able to hear the words
it speaks to us, quietly
but always close.
i don’t know how you do it but your presence makes my mind go blank. i’m so used to always thinking thinking t h i n k i n g about this and that and all my thoughts are round pegs paired with square holes but with you it all just stops.