My name means good news.
I have trouble believing it lately
because the voices that once made me
not want to eat
might be making a comeback, begging for more.
they hiss “the world is better off without your big mouth
your cold heart
your slow mind”
and how can I not believe them
when I hurt everyone
even the boy who believes I put stars in his eyes?
“he’d be better off without me” I say.
And then, I remember the sunburned wrinkled face
of the woman who lent me her name.
She never smiles at photos
but she always gives
and asks for so few things in return.
Once I arrived home 5 hours earlier
and she started crying out of joy
she always gives me the tightest hugs
and the best pies
and when I go away, she cries.
I am good news for her.