wreck of the hope

maybe love isn’t so bad after all.

Kylo Ren doesn’t believe in love.

He hasn’t since Supreme Leader Snoke took him in, told him the many reasons his parents didn’t want or love him. They sent him off to the Jedi Academy. They ignored the fact that his nightmares were getting worse. They stopped helping him deal with them, and so many more reasons that tend to swirl around in Kylo’s mind when he is reminded of them.

His relationship was Snoke was the closest one he had, and that was extremely far from anything resembling love. Snoke was hardly capable of love, only passion for the level of power he and Kylo could achieve. And Kylo despised Snoke most of the time, but at least Snoke knew, and acted on, what was best for him. At least Snoke knew what he needed to do to be all he could be in the Force. No one else had ever put forth the amount of effort into building him up to be as strong as he was as Snoke had.

But then you came along.

Kylo had heard the term “life-changing event” before, but never believed it was possible. Not for him, at least. His life was a cycle of training, missions, battle, repeat. Nothing could possibly happen that would change that. His life would always remain those three things. He never would have guessed a fourth subject could be added to that cycle.

But all that changed when he was immediately drawn to you. He met you in the medbay, where you worked, as you were assigned to tend to the nasty injury on his leg he had acquired on his most recent mission. It was probably infected, and upon realizing that, he had finally swallowed a bit of pride and admitted he probably couldn’t fix that himself. So to the medbay he went, and thus, to you.

He knew you were frightened, as everyone always was of him. Yet somehow, that didn’t affect your work. Anyone else he had interacted with in the past always seemed to rush, or make a major mistake of some sort, because of nerves. You didn’t. You were patient with him, even amongst his crude remarks of how you obviously aren’t completely prepared and whether you were really qualified to be a medic or not. You didn’t rush the treatment, take short cuts, or anything else of the sort to get things over with. And that captivated him. He somehow gathered the courage to ask your name as you grew more and more fond of you as he kept coming back for more treatment.

Months later, he often found himself outside the medbay in his spare time, trying to catch a glimpse of you. You noticed.

One day, after quite a while of seeing him hovering around you, you decided to acknowledge his presence. The next time you saw him, you offered him a smile before getting back to work. Your fear of him was slowly subsiding, as he was around a lot of the time you were working and no incidents had occurred. Even though you never actually interacted, it was definitely enough to make you feel braver around him.

Kylo’s heart skipped a beat at the sight of your lips turning up when you acknowledged him. His cheeks flushed under his mask, and he was very grateful that no one could see. For the next few days, this repeated. You smiled at him, and he became more and more flustered, wondering what this feeling was that he was developing towards you. He’d never felt this warmth before…yet your simple smile had the power to spark it in him. He was a bit confused, to say the least.

Perhaps a week later (it’s hard to tell sometimes as your days blurred together with patients, patients, and more patients), Kylo began to follow you as your shift ended and you left the medbay to make the trek to your living quarters. When you noticed, you turned around to face him.

“Is there something I can help you with, sir?” You asked, smiling at him again.

And there it was again. As his heart rate increased, Kylo was once more aware of that strange warmth in his chest that he had become a little more familiar with since meeting you.

“Well, I was just, well…wondering if…” He stuttered, cursing his tongue for tripping over the words. He released the breath he didn’t realize he was even holding and flexed his fingers nervously. “Would you join me at the viewport tonight at 1000?”

He folded his hands together behind his back as to hide how much they were shaking.

Your brows knotted together for a second, as that was certainly not what you were expecting. But then your heart began to flutter as you realized that Ren never invites people to do things. That must mean…he likes you. Ren doesn’t like anyone!

Your smile grew bigger as you answered. “I would love to.”

Kylo nodded and opened his mouth to say something, but found he lacked anything to say and instead hurried past you in a rush to get to his quarters to prepare himself. Still smiling, you too hurried to your room.

***

Kylo was at the viewport at 0950. He had spent the time leading up to this pacing around his rooms, taking his helmet off then putting it back on and adjusting his cowl then abandoning it on the bed then hurriedly pulling it back on as the free time he had grew shorter. He couldn’t remember a time he was more nervous. His first battle hadn’t even inspired the intense nerves he was fighting at the moment, something he always thought would hold the title of making him most scared.

He had ended up leaving everything on, including his helmet, and was fiddling with his gloves when you arrived at 0958. Your hair wasn’t in the tight regulation bun, instead resting atop your shoulders, and you were wearing a nice pair of black pants and a black shirt with a single red stripe on each short sleeve. It was nothing fancy, but it was nicer than your medic scrubs (which Kylo already thought you looked beautiful in, so this almost stopped his already pounding heart).

“I hope you don’t mind that my hair isn’t within regulation,” You said sheepishly. Had Kylo always been this tall? You had always preferred men around the same height as you, but perhaps that could change…

“No, not at all,” Kylo answered. He wanted nothing more than to tell you how gorgeous you looked with your face framed by the waves like that, but his brain couldn’t send the words to his mouth.

You smiled at him for the third time that day and stood beside him, turning to face the large window exposing the stars to you. “I’ve never seen so many at once before…” You stated in awe of the view.

“You haven’t?”

Your cheeks turned pink. “The windows in the medbay are quite small. Can’t see much. Same with the ones in my room.”

Suddenly Kylo wanted to show you everything…to take you out in his Command Shuttle and show you the solar systems, the constellations, the planets he knew so much about from years of studying them on missions and through books he had acquired. He wanted to do whatever it took to make you happy.

Without realizing it, he brushed the back of his hand against yours as he longed to show you the galaxy. He was imagining taking that hand…taking you anywhere and everywhere you could ever imagine…

“Kylo?”

He was suddenly thrust back into the present. He was holding your hand.

“I-I apologize-” He stuttered, making to pull his hand back. But you only gripped it tighter.

“Don’t be.”

***

After a few weeks of these nightly “dates,” Kylo decided to leave his mask in his quarters for that night’s meeting. He wasn’t really sure what made him do it, he just had this feeling. A feeling that it was about time for you to see just who you were growing close to. How he’d gotten this far without showing you, he had no clue. Even though “far” really only consisted of hand holding and a few more innocent touches.

When you found him waiting for you in the viewport, you nearly froze where you stood. So this was Kylo? The man behind the mask? You knew he was young, but you didn’t expect him to look so fair, too. He looked like a prince, or like a sculpture that belonged in a museum. Every feature, from his nose to his freckles, were perfectly arranged. And his lips…

“Good evening, y/n,” He said. Without his mask, the emotion in his deep voice was so much clearer. He was obviously nervous.

“Evening, Ren,” You replied, slowly placing your hand in his. You couldn’t tear your eyes away from that magnificent face, no matter how hard you tried. His eyes were extremely expressive, and they nearly revealed everything he was feeling. You saw fear, longing, and…was that…adoration?

Kylo’s heart was pounding against his chest. It was probably going to burst out of it. He opened his mouth to speak, but his mind blanked. All he could think about was how he no longer had his mask in the way. He could finally make a move, if he could just gather the courage.

“Call me Kylo, please,” He whispered as his eyes flicked down to your lips. You knew exactly what he was thinking, as your thoughts were exactly the same. As your mind began to buzz, all reason and logic leaving you, you kissed him.

Kylo had never kissed anyone before. As the pounding of his heart somehow increased, he tried to mimic you, trying to be anything but bad. He didn’t want to be bad. He wanted this to be special, and that would be impossible if he was bad.

You had had experience with kissing before, so it was blatantly obvious to you that Kylo hadn’t had any. The kiss was a bit awkward, to say the least, but somehow that made everything even more charming. It was also obvious how hard he was trying, which warmed your heart more than anything he’d ever said or done before. Suddenly, you were very aware of the fact that you were falling dangerously in love with Kylo Ren.

When the two of you pulled away, Kylo’s face and ears were pink and he was staring at you like you were his lifeline. I’m that moment, everything Snoke had ever told him about love was wrong. Maybe…it did exist. And maybe, just maybe, he had found it with you. And if this was love, it wasn’t so bad after all.

You were his life changing event. This was the moment Kylo Ren began believing in love again.

Why are we even surprised that a bunch of cishet actors were complete dickheads in regards to LGBTQ+ representation/ships? Honestly the Supergirl cast can go rot at this point. Season 2 was such a train wreck & the cast made fucking fools of themselves at SDCC. I really hope Katie finds a new show because she really deserves a job where queer folk won’t be openly mocked right in her face. Whether she herself is queer or not, she has shown herself to be an actual ally by continuously defending and supporting her lgbtq+ fans even after all the crazy shit that happened with her brother

Well then. Not only was Seokmin born on this day but so has Vernon! Our beloved Hansol Vernon Chwe, our beloved half caucasian half asian idol! My dear fellow ‘98 line!

Originally posted by sneezes

Ok so, lets get the obvious out of the way. Yes, Vernon is super attractive, insanely so perhaps. is genes have clearly worked in his favour.

Originally posted by sneezes

Clearly, he is extremely handsome, very naughty.

But the thing that impressed me the most with Vernon is how hard he has been trying to improve himself.

So we all know that his first attempt at showing off his rap skills as an individual had been anything but successful. 

Originally posted by buseunqkwan

Indeed, he kinda tried to bite more than he could chew. He tried to be too ‘gangsta’, too ‘hardcore’ before he could develop.

However, instead of closing inside of himself when he failed, instead of throwing a fit, he accepted defeat and decided to learn, to evolve as an artist. Indeed, he continued to grow, rather than blame others.

Keep reading

I know everyone is rl worried about Supergirl writers turning Lena Luthor evil after that super shady chess scene but I’d like to offer an alternative explanation.
See, when we see Lena playing chess against her brother Lex, she’s actually playing as the white set. Which as we know, symbolically represents the “light” side”.

This foreshadows Lex and Lena being on opposing sides of the battle of good v evil as adults. Lex on the side of dark and Lena the side of light. Not only that, but the piece she uses to move into checkmate?

THE KNIGHT. Which as you may remember, moves in an L pattern. Knights are also symbolic of nobility, courage and honor. A white knight is a saviour. I think it’s highly unlikely to be coincidence that it was the knight that Lena used to defeat Lex. When Lena is in her office after Kara leaves, she picks up that same piece in contemplation.

Lena is looking back on that chess game she had with Lex all those years ago, where she defeated him using the white knight. I think this strongly suggests that Lena herself is the white knight, rather than it being Kara as initial interpretations might suggest.

Instead of this being a “muhahaha, I’m actually an evil mastermind” moment, it symbolises her coming battle against the forces of evil (aka Lillian Luthor). She’s smart and resourceful and she defeated them once,she can do it again. She’s not evil, she’s just an extra ho who is planning to wreck Lillian’s shit.

At least this is what I’m hoping b/c honestly it would be terrible writing at this point to build up a narrative of “it’s not your origin or your genetics that make you, it’s your choices” (mon-el, m’gann), only to destroy it by making Lena evil all along.

@lesbianlena

4

Miraculous | Ladybug and Cat Noir | The Love Square

     Lady luck tied two lovers together.
           But bad luck set them apart at odds and ends.

ok so. because i lost a lot of my work, including a one-shot bnha thing and a steven universe pic (it was gonna be a surprise drop tonight but… you know), I’m gonna take a break for a few days. Just to try and recover from this. I still can’t really believe all those pages of the otayuri comic are gone, but i’m trying to stay calm about everything i’ve lost. I can redraw it. I can…

alrighty it’s announcement time

I’m moving to another blog. short and sweet, reasons are as follows:

1. I’ve become too lazy to organize anything on here, which ticks me off a little since I don’t like messes! I always say I’ll do this or that, but I end up not doing it at all. I want the new blog to be more friendly, since I was hesitant to do a lot of things here.
2. before, I made myself believe it was a duty to continue posting no matter how shit the content was, and I was tired out from that. I want to get away from the stupidity I had while I was running this blog before.
3. don’t get me wrong – Komaeda is great – but him all the time is so stressful. I don’t want everyone to forget that there’s other wonderful characters in the dangan ronpa universe. also, I want to make some funnies for my other favorites in the series…
4. moving away from blogcentric points… lately my emotional state has gone to the gutter. it’s been hard to do everything and I can barely work on irl things without getting stressed, all personal problems. remaking this blog might be refreshing, and I think it might help a bit.

I’ll be using the same name, so later on the name of this one’s going to change. if you want to continue to follow my antics, please read the first post of the new blog here. and different from this blog – I actually have a theme! things are still under construction there… but more on that in the first post.

that’s it, my dudes. if anyone has questions or whatever then you can message me… preferably on the new blog, though! say bye bye to this hell blog, and hello to the new one.

Hawkeye (2012) #11