wow why did i make this

Why did i spend time making this

RANDOM SENTENCE STARTERS

Following my AUs and Prompts List from a few months back, here is a compilation of my favorite sentence starters for all your writing needs.

Because most of them aren’t mine, credits are at the end.

SHORT

“Marry me.”

“Do you want me to leave?”

“You are not going without me.”

“I can’t believe you!”

“I swear it won’t happen again.”

“What did you say?”

“I’m not jealous.”

"You’re jealous, aren’t you?”

“We can’t keep doing this.”

“Are you sure this is legal?”

“Isn’t this amazing?”

“I’m going to take care of you, okay?”

“Stay the night. Please.”

“You can’t die. Please don’t die.”

“Run away with me.”

“You did WHAT?”

“Quit whining.”

“Get outta my sight!”

“Why are you so annoying?”

“Were you ever going to tell me?”

"Never in a million years.”

“Don’t ask me that…”

“I might have had a few shots.”

“What’s with the box?”

“W- What are you doing?”

“Say it!”

“I could kiss you right now!”

“Are you done with that?”

“What’s going on here?”

“Stop pinning this on me! You started it!”

“It’s your fault we’re in this mess.”

“Did you do this on purpose?!”

“Kiss me.”

“Are you still awake..?”

“Excuse you?”

“This is all your fault!”

“I can’t believe you dragged me into this.”

“Don’t give me that look! It wasn’t my fault!”

“I shouldn’t be in love with you!”

“It’s not fair!”

“I could kill you right now!”

“Knock it off!”

“Screw you!”

“You’re a complete moron!”

“I love this song!”

“I can’t be in love with you!”

“Make me.”

“Don’t tempt me.”

“I hate you.”

“You are infuriating!”

“Just shut up already.”

“That doesn’t even make sense.”

“Bite me.”

“Eat me.”

“Kiss my ass.”

“Just admit I’m right.”

“Just admit you’re wrong.”

“You are being ridiculous!”

“That’s irrational.”

“Listen to me!”

“That’s not what I meant and you know it.”

“Don’t yell at me.”

“That’s it. End of discussion.”

“I don’t believe you.”

“You shouldn’t have said that.”

“Fuck you!”

“Shut your mouth before I shut it for you.”

“How dare you?”

“I dare you!” 

“It’s you, it’s always been you.” 

“Well this is awkward…”

“Just pretend to be my date”.  

MISCELLANEOUS

“Are you really gonna leave without asking me the question you’ve been dying to ask me?”

“The planet is fine. The people are fucked.”

“I just did some calculations, and I’ve been able to determine that you’re full of shit.”

“You know what I like most about people? Pets.”

“Do you ever think if people heard our conversations they’d lock us up?”

“What about a compromise? I’ll kill them first, and if it turns out they were friendly, I’ll apologize.”

“I don’t hate you.. I just don’t like that you exist.”

“Love is the jelly to sunshine’s peanut butter. And if I tell you that I’m in sandwich with you, I’m not just saying it to get in your Ziploc bag.”

“Do things that make you happy within the confines of the legal system.”

“Did you really just insult Captain America in front of me?”

“Can I touch your boob?”

“It’s not that you’re wrong, exactly, you’re just extremely not right.”

“You shouldn’t be trusted with small children, should you?”

“Give me cake or give me death.”

“On a scale from, ’I can sometimes make important phone calls without crying’ to ’I have a stable job with a steady income, a spouse who loves me, a dog, and two kids who are screwed up minimally at worst’, how much of an adult are you?”

“You think I’m dumb enough to fall for that stupid move?”

“Despite the cliche, it’s not me, it’s you.”

“Obviously you can’t tell a woman you just met that you love her, but it sucks that you can’t.”

“No, it was my fault for thinking that you might care.”

“When you love someone, you just don’t stop. Ever. Even when people roll their eyes or call you crazy… even then. Specially then!”

“If you’re not scared, then you’re not taking a chance. If you’re not taking a chance, then what the hell are we doing anyway?”

“I think I’ve been holding myself back from falling in love with you all over again.”

“What have I told you about the toilet seat?”

“I tried to change the duvet and I got stuck inside.”

“I vote today to be a pajama day.”

“You have to tell me why were committing a felony before we do it. Not that that’s going to stop us, but at least I’ll have all the facts.”

“I don’t leave messages. If I wanted to talk to a machine, I’d talk to my VCR.”

“I can be flexible. As long as everything is exactly the way I want it, I’m totally flexible.”

“You know we’re suppose to be together. I knew it the first time I saw you, and you know it, too. I know you do.”

“Those things you said yesterday… Did you mean them?”

“I’m not going to apologise for this. Not anymore.”

“What I hear when I’m being yelled at is people caring loudly at me.”

“I am NOT crying, okay?! I’m allergic to jerks!”

“This would not happen if I had a penis!”

“That’s almost exactly the opposite of what I meant.”

“All nighter, you and me. First one to fall sleep buys the other dinner.”

“I don’t think I’ve ever played spin the bottle.”

“Sorry! I didn’t mean to touch your butt.”

“I’m ok, thank you. Just please, stop talking to me.”

“To the night you’ll never remember!”

“Excuse me, did the 12:15 bus come by already?”

“Could I sit here? All the other tables are full.”

“Are you meeting someone here? Because.. I think I’m that person.”

“You weren’t supposed to laugh! I’m so embarrassed!”

“It must be hard with your sense of direction, never being able to find your way to a decent pickup line.”

“Driver picks the music, shotgun shuts his/her cake hole.”

“I’m not gonna die in a hospital where the nurses aren’t even hot.”

“You better take care of that car or I swear I’ll haunt your ass!”

“This is the dumbest thing you’ve ever done.“

“It’s a real shame nobody asked for your opinion.”

“I could do that, but could doesn’t mean would.”

“You cannot fathom the immensity of the fucks I don’t give.”

“You’re like, five feet tall. How you gonna reach me, shortie?”

"I recognize that you have reached a decision, but given that it is a stupid ass decision I have elected to ignore it”

“Do you need me to kill someone for you?”

“Look out where you’re going, asshole!”

“Fuck the sandwich guy!”

“I did not mean for stripping to come out of this.”

“The whole street is blocked off. The police won’t tell us anything, but I think there’s been some kind of attack… Maybe a bomb?”

“Oh my god, are you okay? I’m calling the police. I think I saw who did this to you.”

“I’m weird, you’re weird, we could have weird little babies and live weirdly ever after if it wasn’t for the fact I find you repulsive.”

“There is nothing wrong with planning a wedding with a video game character.”

“I’m gonna lay down and die for like half hour okay?”  

“There’s been some real friction in our friend group lately. I suggest an orgy to save our friendships.”

“It’s midnight, what do you want?”

“I think I know how to use a bed.”

“If I wake up in the morning and I’m dead… Wait.”

“You are completely unfit to handle a child.”

“We have to get out of this place. It is EVIL.”

“Don’t you dare throw that snowba-, goddammit!”

“When in doubt curl into the fetal position and give up on life.”

“It’s not a double date, we’re just third and forth wheeling.”

PREGNANCY

“I have something to tell you…”

“I think I’m pregnant.”

“I’m pregnant!”

“When were you going to tell me that you’re pregnant?”

“You’re smart and successful with an adorable belly.”

“$50 bucks says it’s a girl/boy.”

“Pregnancy suits you…”

“Hello little one. We can’t wait to meet you…”

“I’ll just be in the bathroom throwing my fucking guts up because our unborn kid wants to be a dick!”

“There’s someone I’d like you to meet…”

“Shh… He/she’s sleeping..”

“I have a special surprise for you. Close your eyes and follow me.”

“No, no, no, no, no, we aren’t ready… We aren’t ready for kids yet!”

“Oh, gosh, I felt it! I felt a kick!”

FLUFF

“Your hair is so soft…”

“You’re so cute when you pout like that!”

“Just relax, I’ll wash your hair for you.”

“I’m not going to stop poking you until you give me some attention.”

“What, does that feel good?”

“HA! I found a weak-spot on you, didn’t I?”

“Are you wearing my shirt?”

“You are ridiculously comfortable…”

“I’ve had a rough day and honestly all I want right now is a drink and someone to cuddle with…”

“You’re so cute when you’re half asleep like this…”

“You’re beautiful, you know that?”

“We should get a puppy!”

STARGAZING

“Aren’t they beautiful?”

“These stars are nothing compared to the ones I’ve seen in your eyes.”

“Shooting star, make a wish.”

“It’s actually a comet, but I’ll still make one.”

“Imagine if it could always be this way, even in the city.”

“Never thought something so beautiful could exist in nature…”

“Wouldn’t it be cool to name a star after yourself?”

“Y'know, your roof may not be the safest place for us to stargaze.”

“This is why you made me drive three hours out into the middle of nowhere?”

“Is that a– Wait, no, just an airplane.”

“I wouldn’t mind falling asleep out here.

FLIRTY/SUGGESTIVE/SEXUAL

“Did you just… finish?”

“They always make shower sex sound so appealing, but honestly, this is getting dangerous.”

“I’m not actually feeling anything.”

“Are you getting any closer?”

“Why do they make this look so easy in all those porn movies?! This hurts like fuck!”

“Did something just happen? You’re not turned on anymore.”

“Shit sorry, am I going too fast?”

“Wow, you’re hot.”

“Is that a gun in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?”

“Hey, I’m open minded.”

“Keep sweet-talking and this could go a whole new direction.”

“I think it’s about time we stop avoiding the obvious.”

“I’m gonna be honest with you. I’m really horny, and you’re really hot. Can we fuck? Like, now?”

“I see someone’s happy to see me.”

“I saw that. You just checked me out.”

“You know, when this is over, we should really have angry sex.”

“Take off your clothes.”

“Tell all those other guys/girls you don’t need them ‘cause you got me.”

“Don’t give me that face, it’s so cute I might not be able to hold back.”

“Boobs are really just squishy pillows.”

“If you don’t get turned on by having your neck kissed somethings wrong with you.”

“Blasphemy! Sex solves everything.”

“I platonically want to have sex with you. No big deal.”

TEXTS

[text]: What do you want now?

[text]: Do you want to bet on that?

[text]: Guess who just got back in town.

[text]: So I might be in a hospital right now…

[text]: We can’t keep doing this anymore!

[text]: Come on, come to the party!

[text]: Can you pick me up from the bar? Too drunk to drive.

[text]: You have no clue how I feel so shut up.

[text]: I call bullshit.

[text]: You thought you could get away with that, didn’t you?

[text] I gave up great shower sex to be here so don’t say I never did anything for our friendship.

[text] Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.

[text] Also, my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall.

[text] Who says no to sex and donuts?!

[text] I know what you did last summer…

Sources: x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x

Things Bookworms Say/Think as They Read
  • …WHY?!?!
  • Wait, what the heck just happened?
  • OH, i skipped over a page. No wonder nothing made sense.
  • I wish you were real…
  • Daaaaaaamn! this character is hot!
  • I swear to all that is holy is this character dies I will destroy something
  • …well that was a stupid decision.
  • I ship it…like FedEx.
  • Why are you attracted to them?!? They treat you like dirt!!
  • Wow, what a plot twist…(sarcasm)
  • WOAH! What a plot twist!(not sarcasm)
  • Why would you do that?!?
  • …Nope. Nope! That’s it! I’ve had it! I’m noping the f*ck out of this book!
  • Oh God! *bends over in pain* the feels…right in the heart
  • No. Don’t lie to your love interest. Lying only makes it worse…goddamnit.
  • Aw! They’re so good together! <3
  • Do not flip to the end. Do not flip to the end to see what happens. Do not-GODDAMNIT!
  • Oh! I see what you did there author! lol
  • Do NOT hurt my cinnamonroll characters!
  • They’re twisted, cruel, sarcastic, and possibly the most evil person in the universe…they’re mine now. I call dibs.
  • …this book is too small to read without cracking the spine! (mass market books)
  • I’m already reading this book but that book just got in the mail but this other book has been on my shelf for a month…
  • Me when I'm focused: I find something cool to read. There is the vague awareness of sunlight no longer shining through the window behind me, followed by the return of said light. Wait, shit, that means I've been reading all night. If I didn't keep snacks nearby, it's possible that I wouldn't have eaten.
  • Me when I'm unable to focus: I find something cool to read. I cannot make it past the first two paragraphs. Wow, there sure is a lot of text of the page. My brain refuses to properly process it. There are the sounds of a conversation in another room, the ever-present hum of electronics, cats walking on the roof. My foot itches, and I have a song stuck in my head. ...Why am I poking myself in the face with a drinking straw? Where did I even get the straw?? Where did it come from???? I walk away, confused and realizing I'm hungry. I go to grab a can of beans, and come back with two coloring books, a pair of headphones and the overwhelming feeling that I forgot something. I put the items down on the couch and pace back and forth for no reason.

anonymous asked:

Do you think Logan has a bunch of bottles (of emotions) on a self or something in his room?

Ok ok dude thats so cool and angsty because literal bottled up emotions,

ya know how logan is all 0 emotions, feelings ugh what are they etc etc, what if every time he bottles up his emotions and feelings (maybe because he doesnt understand them, doesnt know how to deal with them, stuff like that) a new bottle appears, and maybe its labelled with the emotion or what happened. and every time logic sees the shelf he just kind of. wow. thats a lot of bottles. and new ones are appearing all the time. and he doesn’t know what to do with them so these bottled up emotions just stay there, making him feel guilty and confused and horrible every time he sees them and he doesnt even know why. he cant help but bottle up his emotions because he doesnt quite understand them,, or know how to deal, and every time he sees a new bottle it makes him feel a little more confused, a little lost, a little more broken. maybe every time he sees the shelf a new bottle appears because of that. 

what if one of the other sides saw the shelf and the hundreds of bottles.

Imagine Jack spilling to you what Dean thinks, and practically feels, of you when he reads his mind.

“Wait, wait, wait, wait.” Dean raised a hand, stopping Jack from drinking his beer “How old do you think you are?” he asked, mouth half full as you and Sam shared a look.

“Uh 3 days, 17 hours and 42 minutes.” Jack replied precisely to the question and seeing the look on Dean’s face almost made you choke on your own drink. It was priceless to say the least. Barely at four days old and the young man had already outsassed the older Winchester, well this was going to be fun. Dean just shook his head and took a sip of his beer, Jack watching closely and doing the same at the exact almost moment.

“So-” Jack cleared his throat, looking at you “You are my aunt, right?”

“Uh well-” you smiled “Was, actually. I’m no longer an angel, I fell and after building a vessel things happened and… there is no angel mojo in me anymore. So I am practically human.”

Keep reading

Prompt List of Sarcasm
  1. “Well, what can I say? I’m a badass.” 
  2. “Define normal.” 
  3. “Do I get bonus points if I act like I care?” 
  4. “Just remember if we get caught, you’re deaf and I don’t speak English.” 
  5. “Don’t look for any redeeming qualities. I don’t have any.” 
  6. “It’s amazing how fast the world can go from bad to total shit storm.” 
  7. “I love you. You enormously stubborn pain in the ass.” 
  8. “And you wonder why you’re still single.” 
  9. “Remind me to kill you. Please.” 
  10. “I’m listening to you. I’m just not paying attention.” 
  11. “That’s a little melodramatic, don’t you think?” 
  12. “Were you dropped on your head?” 
  13. “She’s crazy. And just when you think you’ve reached the bottom of her craziness, there’s a crazy underground garage.” 
  14. “She may seem like lollipops and rainbows but I bet behind close doors she’s latex and whips.” 
  15. “If my day gets any worse, I’m asking hell if they’re having an exchange program.” 
  16. “Sorry. I don’t speak skank.” 
  17. “If I survive, can I go home?” 
  18. “My middle finger salutes you.” 
  19. “This is a whole new level of moronic, even for you.” 
  20. “I don’t think I could ever stab someone. I mean, let’s be honest. I can barely get the straw in the Capri Sun.” 
  21. “I don’t have enough middle fingers to let you know how I feel.” 
  22. “Insanity run in my family. It practically gallops.” 
  23. “Oh darling. Go buy a brain.” 
  24. “Somebody’s cranky.” “Somebody needs to shut up.” 
  25. “Frankly my dear, I don’t give a damn.” 
  26. “All due respect, but that’s a bunch of crap.” 
  27. “I am one of the few people in the world who can murder you and leave no forensic evidence behind.” 
  28. “Excuse me. I have to go make a scene.” 
  29. “What did I tell you about calling her/him the devil?” “That it’s offensive to the devil?” 
  30. “I heard that!” “You were supposed to!” 
  31. “I need therapy after this.” 
  32. “You didn’t get in trouble for lying. You got in trouble for lying badly.” 
  33. “I’m not weird. I am limited edition.” 
  34. “I turned out liking you a lot more that I originally planned.” 
  35. “I think you’re weird.” “I think you’re boring.” 
  36. “If history repeats itself, I am so getting a dinosaur.” 
  37. “You seem somewhat familiar. Have I threatened you before?” 
  38. “I’m afraid I’ve been thinking…” “A dangerous pastime.” 
  39. “I’d explain it to you, but you’re brain would explode.” 
  40. “Wow, there’s a big surprise. I think I’m going to have a heart attack and die from surprise.” 
  41. “I’m gonna hit you so hard, it’ll make you ancestors dizzy.” 
  42. “Even when we were kids, I always kicked your ass!” 
  43. “Sarcasm is the body’s natural reaction to stupidity.” 
  44. “You’re good. A monster pain in the ass… but you’re good.” 
  45. “Well, excuse me, psychic wonder!” 
  46. “The female of the species is more deadly than the male.” 
  47. “Don’t look in her eyes, she might steal your soul.” 
  48. “She’s hot, but she’s evil.” 
  49. “Do I regret it? Yes. Would I do it again? Probably.” 
  50. “I already know that I’m going to hell. At this point it’s really go big or go home.” 
  51. “Go on, knock his teeth down his throat.” 
  52. “You’re going to burn in a very special level of hell. A level they reserve for child molesters, animal abusers and people who talk at the theater.” 
  53. “What’s the point in screaming? No one’s listening anyway.” 
  54. “I’m not a damsel in distress. I’m a damsel doing damage.” 
  55. “So stick that in your juice box and suck it.” 
  56. “Never take life seriously. No one ever comes out alive anyway.” 
  57. “This place hold a lot of memories for me. Some bad, some… No. No, no, all bad.” 
  58. “A little gasoline… blowtorch… no problem.” 
  59. “Good, bad, I’m the one with the gun.” 
  60. “I know you can’t kill anybody, ‘cause I can’t kill anybody.” 
  61. “You’re insane, but you might also be brilliant.” 
  62. “What you call insanity, I call inspiration.” 
  63. “Sometimes I question my sanity. Occasionally it replies.” 
  64. “Why should we date?” “Because we are attracted to each other.” “I am attracted to pie, but I do not feel the need to date pie.” 
  65. “Why does everyone assume the worst of me.” “It saves time.” 
  66. “I like you. You’re different.” 
  67. “You successfully cured him/her of anything interesting about his/her personality.” 
  68. “Neither one us is drunk enough for this conversation.” 
  69. “You’re questioning my methods.” “I’m not questioning it, I’m saying it’s stupid.” 
  70. “Wow, somebody needs a Happy Meal.” 
  71. “I didn’t do it!” “Then why are you laughing?” “Because whoever did it is a freaking genius.” 
  72. “Idiots. I’m surrounded by idiots.” 
  73. “You couldn’t handle me even if I came with instructions.” 
  74. “I care so little, I almost passed out.” 
  75. “Well behaved woman rarely make history.” 
  76. “You’re so weird.” “You have no idea.” 
  77. “The universe may not always play fair, but at least it’s got a hell of a sense of humor.” 
  78. “You haven’t even seen my bad side yet.” 
  79. “Obviously you have mistaken me for somebody who gives a shit.” 
  80. “How’s life treating you?” “Like I ran over it’s dog.” 
  81. “Rule number one: don’t bother sucking up. I already hate you, that’s not going to change.” 
  82. “Oh God, we’re not gonna have to hug or anything, are we.” 
  83. “I’m so glad you could come.” “Cut the crap. Give me a drink.” 
  84. “You make no sense to me.” “Welcome to my life.” 
  85. “Have fun being deal.” “I will.” 
  86. “Damn, you’re strong for a little thing.” 
  87. “It’s called thinking. Go with it.” 
  88. “I made a new friend today.” “Real or imaginary?” “Imaginary.” 
  89. “Where have you been all my life?” “Hiding from you.” 
  90. “I’m getting real bored and impatient. I don’t do bored and impatient.” 
  91. “The girl is strange no question.” 
  92. “Do us a favor… I know it’s difficult for you… but please, stay here, and try no to do anything… stupid.” 
  93. “I know most people don’t like me; I don’t care, I don’t like most people.” 
  94. “You are a very strange person.” “Well, thanks for noticing.” 
  95. “I can tell that you think what you’re saying is funny, but… no.”
  96. “I didn’t steal it. I permanently borrowed it.” 
  97. “I’m not shy. I’m just examining my prey.” 
  98. “If you pull out my earphones, I will pull out your lungs.”
  99. “I don’t dislike you, I nothing you.” 
  100. “Are you crying? No, I’m impersonating a fountain.” 
  101. “Ah, he’s playing hard-to-get. That’s cute.” 
  102. “You’re kinda anti-social, you know that?” 
  103. “I feel like a freakin’ soccer mom.” 
  104. “My advice is much more subtle. Stop being an ass.” 
  105. “I’m just gonna pack up and go straight to hell now.” 
  106. “My ex? Yeah, I’d still hit that. Except this time it would be with a car or baseball bat.” 
  107. “She’s complicated like the DaVinci code, you know but harder to crack.” 
  108. “And just like everything else we do around here, it’s about to get weirder.” 
  109. “Such big evil in such a little thing.” 
  110. “Why do I still like you, knowing you’re a total asshole?” 
  111. “What does not kill you will likely try again.” 
  112. “Oh honey, I would but… I don’t want to.” 
  113. “And hello to you too… little homewrecker.” 
  114. “I’m gonna make you wish you were dead.” 
  115. “I don’t need anger management. I need people to stop pissing me off.” 
  116. “What doesn’t kill me might make me kill you.”
  117. “In another life, I think I was in a mental institution.” 
  118. “I’m not crazy. I’m just interesting.” 
  119. “Don’t make me pop your ten grand sand bags honey.” 
  120. “This is fun.” “Seriously, we’re trying to hide a body.” 

Request [x] Masterlist [x]

Imagine demon!Dean beating a guy up to death because he touched you and he got jealous.

“She’s pretty.” you said softly, trying to hold back the hint of bitterness and pain in your voice. Or jealousy for that matter. You couldn’t blame her, who knew with how many women Dean had been with ever since he became a demon.

“And probably his type. But it shouldn’t bother you now, should it chipmunk?” Crowley raised an eyebrow as the both of you didn’t take your eyes off of the demon playing darts as the blonde waitress gave him another drink with a rather flirtysmile might you say.

“Not now, not ever.” Crowley finally turned to look at you “You are not his girlfriend, (Y/n). Never been, yet you are bothered so much by this. I wonder why.”

You scoffed, turning to glare at him “As if you don’t know. Dean is probably the most oblivious man in the world but you never were Crowley. Why would you use this stupid nickname on me if you didn’t?”

“Guilty.” he flashed you a smile, downing his drink “But he’s no longer the man that you remember, love.”

“Right, so that’s why you wanted me here?” you scoffed “And don’t you dare deny it to me Crowley. You didn’t even blink in surprise when you saw me. You’re letting yourself get caught and sooner or later Sam will come walking in as well.”

“I must admit- the only thing that did surprise me was the fact that moose didn’t come in right after you.” he shrugged “But probably- it’s time to finally put him on track-” he looked at Dean “And make him realize how little he is leaving for just how much.”

“Hell? Oh wow, yes Crowley that really is everyone’s dream kingdom.”

“It is one, nonetheless.” he winked at you and before you could say a thing he had vanished right in front of your eyes. You scoffed at him but didn’t have the chance to question him when you turned your head and your eyes locked with his green ones. And just like always they made your heart skip a beat. Because maybe you were always friends but your love for him was undying.

You held your breath as he set his glass down and raised an eyebrow at you. He said nothing to the rest of them men he was playing with and casually strode towards you “(Y/n)” his voice was as rough but a lot more cold “Fancy seeing you here.” and the smirk on his face made it all worse.

“Is it?” you asked in a low voice and his smile dropped.

“What do you want here?” he asked serious.

“Oh so Crowley didn’t tell you?” you scoffed a laugh “He knew I was on your tracks with Sam, he should be here very soon. I managed to get a lead and thought if I could convince you to come back without him having to hurt himself but… I don’t think there is a point in trying.”

“I told you to stay away.” he shrugged casually, stuffing his hands in his pockets “Not my fault you don’t listen.

“You told Sam to let you go, not me. And I thought there was a chance here but- I was wrong obviously. I’m curious how you didn’t see this coming, or even more that Crowley didn’t speak to you about his plans. Whatever those may be. What happened? Don’t you guys tell everything? Oh no, don’t Dean, secrets are bad, they ruin relationships. We know it better than anyone.” you went from sarcastic to completely serious.

He scoffed, putting on a smirk on his face and rolling his eyes “Don’t care what his game is, I am not his toy. I have my own plans and I’m glad that… he made it easier for me.” he looked

“What do you mean?” you frowned when you noticed the predatory smile on his face “Made it easier by letting me find you?”

“I’ll let you know soon, now follow me and let’s out of here. You’re drawing too much fucking attention with those shorts.” he took hold of your arm, dragging you up as he glared at a few men behind you that had been sneaking looks at you.

“Like hell.” you hissed, snatching your arm from his “Why does it even matter to you? Especially now, I am nothing to you. So what if they look? I am free, Dean, hell they can even touch as much as they want to.” you said angrily.

His eyes darkened as he looked “Let’s go. Now.” he said in a low almost growl but you weren’t having any of it.

“Why?” you scoffed a laugh “So that you can kill me now? Or so that she doesn’t see us talking?” you motioned with your head to the blonde that already had her eyes on you. You tried so hard not to show how much this was hurting you.

“She has nothing to do with this. Come on.” he tugged, holding your hand again.

“Right, of course she doesn’t.” you scoffed “With how many have you been exactly all these months?”

“You’d want to know, wouldn’t you?” a satisfied smirk was on his face.

You didn’t have the chance to speak though because another voice spoke up “Is everything alright?” it was a guy you had seen checking you out ever since you came in.

“Yes, everything’s fine actually. My friend here was just leaving.” you gave Dean a look “How about you buy me a drink and we can talk?” you gave him a smile that made his grin widen.

“Yes, of course sweet cheeks.” he wrapped an arm around your waist.

“You’re gonna lose that hand buddy.” Dean growled, and you both stopped before you could leave.

“Excuse me?” he raised an eyebrow “Did you just threaten me?”

“No, I was giving you a friendly warning.” Dean shrugged with a casual smile.

“Yeah, right.” he scoffed, arm tightening on your waist just to mock the demon and for a second you got scared when Dean’s smile completely fell.

“But you obviously don’t listen very well.” he scoffed and before you could realize it he had grabbed the man by the collarof his shirt and pinned him against a pillar.

“And now- you get to see what I mean when I say that you shouldn’t have done that.” and even if you expected it you jumped when he threw a powerful punch at the man. And the another, and another and another without letting him do a single move. You were almost scared for his life when you saw the mark on Dean’s arm burn that angry red as he kept hitting the guy, blood covering his fist and groans and moans of pain filling the bar along with hushed whispers from other customers.

“Fucking asshole, think you could ever have a piece of that?” he scoffed a laugh, punching more “In your dreams!” another punch “She’s too pure and perfect for a bloody jackass like you. You would never stand a fucking chance.” he growled, punching him more.

You could barely make out any of the things he said after that as the sounds were too much to handle. People shouting, some cheering and encouraging him to keep going. And then you heard her.

“Dean, stop!” she screamed but he didn’t listen to her, as he kept punching with groans himself “Stop! You’re gonna kill him!” she screamed but it didn’t seem to have a single effect on him at the moment.

“Would serve him fucking right.” Dean growled, grabbing his bloody face and making the guy look at you “Do you see that? Do you see her?” he said through gritted teeth “She’s great isn’t she? And you’d really want a piece of her tonight but that would be it. You had some gruesome thoughts for her after that though, didn’t you?” he turned his head to look at Dean “Didn’t you?” he roared and he gave him a weak nod.

“Just like I thought.” Dean smirked “For the first, I’d really just break your hand and maybe face. But for this-” he looked at him darkly and your breath got caught in your throat. If he killed him right there in front of so many people he’d draw all the wrong attention.

“Dean!” you screamed “No, no don’t!” you exclaimed and as surprising as it was for everyone, it caught his attention and he glanced at you over your shoulder. You looked at him with wide eyes, shaking your head in fear.

“Seems like your lucky day, bastard.” he growled “You’re very damn lucky that she can have this effect on me because trust me your death… it would have not been easy. And she would never give you a single glance because you know why?” he smirked in an almost sinister way “Oh you know why.” he laughed, pushing him to the side and he fell on the floor. He looked down at him for a second, smirking before with a roll of his eyes he turned around and looked at the rest of the customers.

He didn’t say a think, he only scoffed at them and walked towards you.

“D” you found yourself whispering as you stared at him with wide eyes “You would have-”

“I should have.” he growled “Hope you fucking understand I am not playing games here, (Y/n).” he grabbed your jaw with one hand and your heart leapt to your throat when he brought his face closer to yours, your lips only an inch away. You knew what he wanted to do but he stopped himself, looking from your lips up to your eyes. He smiled slightly, running his thumb over your lower lip.

“You are mine, and I’ll make sure everybody knows it from now on.” he said in a low rough voice and you frowned. You knew in what way he meant it, you were no fool with what he had almost done but it still confused you. You were always friends and on top of that even if he didn’t care at the moment as a demon… what really held him back from forcing a kiss out of you? IT felt as if for a moment you saw your own Dean flash through his eyes.

“Only. Mine.” he said in a husky voice in your ear and you felt shivers run down your spine when his teeth grazed over it “I’ll wait in the car.” he added and let go of you, almost leaving you to try to recover from the shock.

But you only had another one coming once he’d left and the waitress spoke to you “You are (Y/n)?”

“Why-” your voice was hoarse as you looked at her “You know me?” and the look on her face only said yes, making you realize there was only person that could have spoken about you to her.

Dean. But the real question was why?

Dad Pun Sentence Starters

Send one to my Muse, or alternatively send  👍and my Muse will say one to you!

“What time did the man go to the dentist? Tooth hurt-y.”
“Did you hear about the guy who invented Lifesavers? They say he made a mint.”
“A ham sandwich walks into a bar and orders a beer. Bartender says, ‘Sorry we don’t serve food here.’”
“Why did the Clydesdale give the pony a glass of water? Because he was a little horse!”
“How do you make a Kleenex dance? Put a little boogie in it!”
“Two peanuts were walking down the street. One was a salted.”
“I used to have a job at a calendar factory but I got the sack because I took a couple of days off.”
“How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it.”
“Two guys walk into a bar, the third one ducks.”
“'Wow, you’re a fart smella…I mean smart fella!”
“I had a dream that I was a muffler last night. I woke up exhausted!”
“What’s Forrest Gump’s password? 1forrest1”
“Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? Great food, no atmosphere.”
“What do you call a fake noodle? An Impasta.”
“How many apples grow on a tree? All of them.”
“Want to hear a joke about paper? Nevermind it’s tearable.”
“I just watched a program about beavers. It was the best dam program I’ve ever seen.”
“Why did the coffee file a police report? It got mugged.”
“How does a penguin build it’s house? Igloos it together.”
“Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.”
“Why don’t skeletons ever go trick or treating? Because they have no body to go with.”
“Don’t call me later, call me Dad.”
“What do you call an elephant that doesn’t matter? An irrelephant”
“Want to hear a joke about construction? I’m still working on it.”
“What do you call cheese that isn’t yours? Nacho Cheese.”
“Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself? It was two tired.”
“What did the grape do when he got stepped on? He let out a little wine.”
“I wouldn’t buy anything with velcro. It’s a total rip-off.”
“The shovel was a ground-breaking invention.”
“This graveyard looks overcrowded. People must be dying to get in there.”
“5/4 of people admit that they’re bad with fractions.”
“Two goldfish are in a tank. One says to the other, "do you know how to drive this thing?”“
"What do you call a man with a rubber toe? Roberto.”
“What do you call a fat psychic? A four-chin teller.”
“I would avoid the sushi if I was you. It’s a little fishy.”
“To the man in the wheelchair that stole my camouflage jacket… You can hide but you can’t run.”
“The rotation of earth really makes my day.”
“I thought about going on an all-almond diet. But that’s just nuts.”
“What’s brown and sticky? A stick.”
“I’ve never gone to a gun range before. I decided to give it a shot!”
“Why do you never see elephants hiding in trees? Because they’re so good at it.”
“Did you hear about the kidnapping at school? It’s fine, he woke up.”
“A furniture store keeps calling me. All I wanted was one night stand.”
“I used to work in a shoe recycling shop. It was sole destroying.”
“Did I tell you the time I fell in love during a backflip? I was heels over head.”
“I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport. I’m just doing it for kicks.”
“People don’t like having to bend over to get their drinks. We really need to raise the bar.”

6

lit meme: [2/7] otps

aristotle mendoza and dante quintana, aristotle and dante discover the secrets of the universe

“Remember that time you kissed me?”
“Yeah.”
“Remember I said it didn’t work for me?”
“Why are you bringing this up? I remember. I remember. Dammit to hell, Ari, did you think I’d forgotten?”
“I’ve never seen you this mad.”
“I don’t want to talk about that, Ari. It just makes me feel bad.”
“What did I say when you kissed me?”
“You said it didn’t work for you.”
“I lied.”

minyoongihoseok  asked:

Hey I love you and I can't think of what to ask for your thoughts on akskdkf um talk about yoonseok because I love them please

you do indeed love them a lot (nd so do i) so let’s go

i don’t wanna label them best friends but the fact is that they’re really really close and mean the world to each other. call it whatever you want - the fact is that they make each other really fucking happy

(tho yoongi did call hoseok his ‘soul-partner’ back in february)

i guess yoongi’s had a soft spot for hoseok ever since they met.. hobi slept in the living room the first night at the dorms and yoongi told him he should go sleep in the room (proper bed and all) even tho they barely knew each other?

then there’s also the classic story of yoongi going back to the dorms to spend christmas with hobi who was there alone. even brought him chicken,, and hoseok said he would’ve fallen for yoongi right there and then if he were a girl so

yoongi’s always taken care of hoseok - drove him to the hospital when he got sick and needed treatment, always worries about him and makes sure he’s doing well, just…. always there for him

he’s always praising hoseok.. always. not to mention reassuring him when he’s nervous?? sometimes yoongi looks more scared for hoseok than hoseok is afraid of the thing he has to do tbh

also yoongi always calling hoseok his battery, his sunshine, the source of his energy (bts 4th army interview??? oh bOI) + this fanart is cute nd rly accurate. i’m pretty sure hoseok’s helped yoongi a lot through the years

yoongi to hoseok: “a good hearted friend who was by my side to give me energy even when I was having a hard time. during our trainee days, when you collapsed, I went to the infirmary with you. you hate when I talk about it but.. I did (laughs)”

they are simply good for each other y’know?

they make each other laugh all the fucking time. i find it especially beautiful how yoongi will always do some extra shit in order to get hoseok to laugh + he can never fight a smile when hoseok is laughing? it’s a very contagious thing

hoseok telling yoongi he looks good &  yoongi calling hoseok cutefond looks all over the place?? 

yoongi confessing on daily basis, absolutely no awkwardness when it comes to physical contact

hoseok’s tweets for yoongi’s birthday this year were also something else.. he posted a picture for every year they’ve known each other and we all cried

+ yoongi wore hoseok’s birthday present to the airport and referred to it as ‘black plastic bag’

remember that one time yoongi said he’s full just from watching hobi eat and proceeded to give him all the food they got??

but it’s also amazing how hoseok still succeeds at making yoongi flustered.. by either being a nerd and looking too seductive for yoongi to handle or simply by holding his hand?? turning him into a stuttering mess??

then there’s also hoseok’s hesitant hand as kat calls it… what’s up with that

but basically!! they seem really really comfortable with each other and like they trust each other with almost everything + like i said they make each other really happy. the love between them is just,, insane

friends & feelings — tom h.

Originally posted by peterparkerimagine

author’s note: first head cannon bc i couldn’t stop thinking about this. also if you read this thank you so much !! i love you wowow

  • okay but you and tom would definitely start out as best friends
  • like you two would probably meet through harrison and the second you do there’s just this instant connection
    • “i’ve never met one of harrison’s friends before”
    • “maybe because you think you’re his only friend”
  • and he’d just stand there and be like did she just diss me??? i think she just dissed me??? already??
  • but he’d laugh anyway bc that’s not how girls usually talk to him and that’d make you laugh and wow what a beautiful start
  • and as the days went on you two would get closer and closer
  • you guys for sure got closer more emotionally than physically at first 
  • for instance tom would have a bad day and he’d just come to you
  • literally lay in your bed and just talk to you about anything and everything
    • “sometimes this lifestyle just gets too much and i don’t think i’m made for it”
    • “if anyone is made for it, it’s you tom”
    • “and besides if you every turn into an insensitive cocky fuck, harrison and i will hand you your ass”
  • THIS was one of the things he’d love most about you
  • like you’d be there for him and give him great advice when he needs it but at the same time you were you and you just had to make him laugh and diss him in some way to get that pretty smile on his face again
  • he adored it
    • “did you see all those girls out there Y/N- wow they really love me”
    • “lol who are you”
  • in his head he’s always be like “why is she like this” 
  • BUT when you two started getting physically closer wow just wow he adored it just as much if not more than the emotional connection you two had together
  • always hugging you
  • sometimes for no reason at all
    • “tom i’m trying to get a glass of water”
    • “shh shh i’m trying to hug you”
  • that’s when you started to think “why is he like this”
  • so TOUCHY
  • he’d always find excuses to hold your hand
    • “and then she told me- tom what-why are you holding my hand”
    • “there’s a bug on it”
    • “i think i would’ve felt-”
    • “THERE’S A BUG IM TRYING TO SQUISH IT Y/N LEAVE ME BE”

Keep reading

Ride Me Baby *Part 3* (Harry Styles Mature Mini Series)

Originally posted by hipsterharrey

Hiya guys, so finally I’m getting this chapter up. I am beyond over whelmed with the feedback ive been getting from this series and I cant be more thankful for you guys reading it and enjoying it! I hope you enjoy this chapter! –K

**WARNING, EXPLICIT AND DETAILED CONTENT, READ AT YOUR OWN RISK** +18

Word Count: 5,869

Y/N’s POV
As I stood there speechless staring at Kendall as she was staring at Harry then glaring back at me like I had done something wrong. Has Harry been cheating on me with her this whole time? My heart started to sink at the thought. Harry and Kendall did date for a while but broke up because of the public always stalking them or taking pictures 24/7, so for all I know Harry might still have feelings for her and sleeping with her behind everyone’s backs. And by his reaction it seemed like he was happy to see her, even though I was standing right there. “Your faces are priceless, cant believe you fell for that one” Kendall started to laugh uncontrollably as she stood clapping her hands applauding her performance. “What the fuck Ken?” Harry’s face slightly changed into a crooked smile as he joined in with her laughter. “What are you doing here? Please come in” He steps backwards as she walked into our room, with her long legs and flat stomach that was on show under her crop top. She is so beautiful, why did he leave her for me? “Y/N?” My head shot up as I was startled out of my train of thought. “Sorry?” “How are you doing sweetie?” Kendall came over to great me with a hug, which I accepted. I had to. Ive never really sat down and got to know Kendall to know what she is like. She is so sweet and polite, I have no hate against her. But for some reason I don’t like her either. “Im good thanks how are you?” “Good, how are you guys enjoying your trip?” “Yeah its great, Y/N has always wanted to come here so I surprised her for our anniversary” Harry butted in as we walked into our kitchen. “Oh my god I’m so sorry I interrupted, I seen that you guys were here so I thought it would be rude not to come down and say hi” She giggled as her stare as with Harry through out the whole conversation. Now I know why I don’t like her. “Aw thank you for popping in Ken” His stare was with her, again. I don’t know whether I’m reading too much into this situation but with the atmosphere it seemed like he was glad to see her or something, I don’t know.

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Three Is Good Company [m]

Genre : Smut / Threesome 

Summary : In a series of perfectly placed moments you witnessed something you probably weren’t supposed to see.

First of all, you didn’t mean to see it. It just happened. Literally. You were at the wrong place at the wrong time…maybe right place but still, you weren’t supposed to see it. But then why was his door open!?

Keep reading

A Babysitting Love Affair | Zach Dempsey x Reader

Genre: Romance, Fluff
POV: Reader’s/First Person

A/N: This was requested by anon! I hope you guys will like this as much as my first one. I kind of ramble on but please bear with me lol.
Request: could i request a zach dempsey x reader where the reader is babysitting zach’s sister, and zach haven’t met the babysitter yet and one day he goes home early and falls in love with her?

—–

“I’ll be there tomorrow morning Mrs. Dempsey.”

“Alright love, thank you so much!”

I smile as I close the door after Zach’s mom who asked me to babysit Zach’s little sister, May. She mentioned that she will have to go to Chicago for the weekend to take care of something and I was assigned to be May’s companion overnight since her brother is an extremely busy guy. The Dempseys are a close family friend, too bad I’m not really that close with Zach or May. It’s probably because we go to different high schools and it doesn’t really help that I can be anti-social at times. I know nothing about them, and they know nothing about me in return so it’s all good.

—–

The next morning

“I’ll be leaving now or else I’ll miss my flight! Thank you so much again Y/N for babysitting. I’ll see you girls tomorrow morning alright? Feel at home love, my number’s on the fridge if you need me and I left money for any emergency. Zach won’t be here until dinner tonight. He has basketball practice.” Mrs. Dempsey says as she bids goodbye to Zach’s little sister and I.

“Got it Mrs. Dempsey! We’ll see you tomorrow.” I finally say with a smile.

“Bye mom! I’ll be good, I promise!” May puts her right thumb out to her mom and waves goodbye.

“So, what do you want to do today, May?” I ask her as we’re left alone inside the house.

“Hmm, I don’t really have anything in mind. Oh wait I know! Let’s style each other’s hair.” She suggests with a gleam in her eyes; she looked so excited.

“Sure kiddo.” I reply with a smile and we proceed to the living room to watch TV. May got all of her hair accessories from her room for us to use. She decided that it’d be fun to start with my hair first and put them in pigtails and so she did. She chose these pink puffy hair bands to tie my hair. May had long, black and shiny hair which reminded me of Katniss Everdeen so naturally, I chose to put her hair in a fish tail braid.

“Wow Y/N, you’re really good at this!” she beams after her make over.

“Why thank you, Miss Everdeen.” I reply with a bow and she giggles in response.

A couple of hours later and it was almost lunch time. May wanted to order pizza and so we did. She didn’t like vegetables so we opted for a classic cheese pizza instead. A few minutes later and the doorbell rang, I ran to the door to open it, with the money in my left hand.

“Thank you so–” I begin to greet the pizza man but a ginormous, muscular guy hovered above me instead.

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what your fav homestuck character in 2017 says about you: The Kids
  • John: you just love this soft windy boy!! you super dig his aesthetics of blue and wind and flying and oh look you just drew a picture of him kissin some boys. "a pure, splendid boy indeed", you note as you draw john slam dunking dirk into a trash can as a prank
  • Rose: you are gay. you understand the true nature of rose as NOT a prim and proper lady but a pretentious messy goth lesbian who just likes to stay up at 4 am eating coffee beans and critiquing the homoerotic nature of literary works behind an Arby's or something. you love her and you love her twelve million girlfriends like kanaya, jade, vriska, terezi... the list goes on and on. you love her.
  • Dave: you really sympathize with his triumph over abuse and you constantly reblog davekat like your life depended on it. you understand that dave is the most developed character in the comic and you own a pair of mirror shades just to subconsciously remind yourself. have I mentioned how much davekat you reblog and draw and write? davekat is canon guys and your soft asshole boy got the boyfriend of his dreams. here's another comic of him in his underwear watching movies with karkat.
  • Jade: you SUPER DIG her aesthetic. JEEZE she is GOALS. you own at least 500 different pictures of jade holding the five planets on your phone and you love how she is both smart and capable of standing on her own. furries are a-ok and you like making dog jokes with jade. what a precious daughter. being part-dog was the greatest thing that could happen to her. also, you really think she got shafted in the ending and regularly post jade in many cute outfits to fill the void.
  • Jane: you draw her with bright red lipstick and a diner aesthetic. you are kin with jane and primarily ship janeroxycallie (or as I like to call it CottonCallie). you're kinda quiet about your love for her and don't post a whole lot. if someone else made a post for her, you'd be there giving your support and throwing in your own opinions.
  • Roxy: GOOD WIFE GOOD WIFE WIFE MATERIAL HOLY WOW NO WAY WOWZA GOOD WIFE. you are absolutely in love with her and everything she does. you get mad when people draw her with a drink because Hey, my beautiful wife worked her BUTT off to get past that and??? she did it??? wow. she's strong, she's beautiful, she's smart, she's sassy, she's funny. Wow. you draw her gaming, you draw her making jokes, you draw her in different aesthetics, you draw her doing void things, honestly who cares as long as you're drawing her. you might not be into johnroxy but ROXYCALLIE HOLY SHIT MAN. I cannot stress enough how much you love her.
  • Dirk: you can't help but love this trainwreck of a man. he's so problematic but that's why you love him! you regularly upload dirkjohn comics involving his wacky manime antics. everything you draw with dirk is gay or is him doing something ridiculously over the top but that's just the way you like it. sometimes you'll do character analysis posts that really delve into his subconscious and then accidentally attract 30 haters to your blog. you like how he cronches into an orange with the skin on and are CONSTANTLY shitposting.
  • Jake: you and twelve other guys are in the same small cult for this goofy boy's butt. you know just about everyone on this site that loves him. you would die for this man. everything he does makes you smile. you make analysis posts all the time about how he is WAY smarter than he lets on and is an ingenious manipulator but not in the Bad Way. you appreciate him way more than just guns, skulls, and movies. you draw him with very fluffy hair and have four askblogs for him. people will say you have bad taste and you will agree but continue to love him. every one out three comics is about dirk.
  • Trevor Belmont, Castlevania III: Wow, it sure is nice to make friends! I'm so glad I have my pals along with me on my journey.
  • Trevor Belmont, Curse of Darkness: How dare you try and make friends with me? I am a strong independent Belmont who will kill Dracula all on my own. There is no way this plan can go wrong.
  • Trevor Belmont, Castlevania Judgment: Why are all my friends trying to punch me? What did I do to deserve this?
  • Trevor Belmont, Mirror of Fate: [extended high-pitched screaming in the distance]
  • Trevor Belmont, Netflix show: How in the holy goddamn mothershitfucking christ of cuntfuck am I supposed to attack the enemy while the fucking floor is falling down?