wow this is the worst joke

You know in later seasons I would LOVE to see an episode where team lotor and team voltron are stuck together and forced to cooperate to solve the situation.

EVEN BETTER if they do it in pairs. Just imagine:

Hunk and Narti: Hunk is kinda scared because of the whole situation and of his silent companion as well so he keeps rambling and remembering funny stories to cheer up and asking questions and answering to himself as Narti. Which is extremely funny to her. And Narti just takes his hand and makes him feel calm. He also renames Kova into Licorice. 

Pidge and Acxa: Two very smart gals they are able to lay their conflicts aside and work together super efficiently. They talk science and practically finish each others sentences which escalates to them complaining talking about their teammates and lives. Pidge tells her about her Matt and Acxa surprising herself with the sudden need to share tells her about the long lost brother she also has (I WONDER WHO THAT IS)

Lance and Zethrid: Lance would be quite unnerved by her if not for one thing - all his lines and jokes that usually get the groan from his friends make her practically cry with laughter. She does not take his rather small weapon seriously until he snipes some giant armed monster that even she cant take out into its tiny weak spot. After that they work as a  good team until the end. Lance tries to flirt with her and Zethrid laughs again and says call her when he becomes taller.

Allura and Ezor: Ezor looks less galran than the others and her chatty and friendly nature is the only thing that saves her from being smashed by Allura. She still tries at the beginning tho. After begrudgingly accepting Ezor’s offer to work together they cut through any obstacles with ease (strength and magic plus dexterity and stealth wow). Ezor keeps cracking jokes and even flirts with her a lot which causes Allura to have a serious case of deja vu. They still don’t trust each other in the end but both feel that in other life they could.

Keith and Lotor: If Lotor knows about Keith being galra that would be a mind games fest. Even if he’s not he still would try to make Keith feel empathy for him by conjuring some tragic past difficult childhood story (that could actually be true). Their team dynamic would be THE WORST because Lotor used to his commands followed or at least being taken seriously and Keith is absolutely the opposite of that. Which pisses him off so much and keeping his fake friendly personality intact takes all of his strength. They end up solving everything with sword smashing which is fine by Keith.

After everybody is reunited with their respective teams Hunk, Allura, Lance, Zethrid and Ezor talk how they maybe not that different from their enemies. Narti smiles agreeing. Pidge looks at Keith’s sad-ish triangular face and asks if he by chance has a sister. Lotor is distressed but has a lot of information to use against the team voltron and their leader now.

You'll Miss Me When I Go

Part 2:

By the end of the meeting Keith was sure he hated Lance.
He was loud, obnoxious and never stopped talking.
Keith may of been able to forgive most of this if the guy actually had a reason to be at the meetings.
Grieving for himself?
What the he’ll is that supposed to mean?
Like what did he delete his Facebook and decide he needed coinciding for it.
No matter who was talking or what they had to say, Lance had a comment or a joke.
It was like he was laughing at all their suffering.
He was even smiling when Hunk told them all how hard he found it since he lost his grandfather.
Keith was losing it and Allura seemed to notice.
“I think that’s all for today thank you all for coming.” She said standing up.
“But we have at least ten mo-”
Coran was cut off when Allura directed his attention to Keith who had been glaring at Lance for the last ten minutes.
“Ah yes. I do have somewhere to be so we shall bring the group to an end until next session.”
“Sweet I’ll call the bae to pick me up.” Lance joked jumping to his feet and pulling out his phone.
Keith wondered what kind of woman would be crazy enough to stay with that weirdo.
“So any plans after this?” Hunk asked leaning his elbow on his knee to support his head.
“Not really.” Keith shrugged. He had planned on spending the rest of the night at home alone waiting by the phone for any word from Shiro.
“Well you do now.” Hunk grinned standing up and grabbing his backpack.
“Hu?”
“Hunks tradition, after every session we go get ice cream.” Pidge explained trying to look uninterested but something about her tone gave away the fact she was actually looking forward to it.
“I don’t know… I mean I wouldn’t want to intrude.” Keith decided to leave out the fact he wasn’t sure he could stand much more of Lance before putting him on his ass.
“Awww come on, first Lance won’t come, now you don’t want to come.” Hunk groaned throwing his arms up in the air dramatically.
“Wait Lance isn’t coming?… erm I mean sure I suppose I could go for ice cream.” Keith smiled slightly as Hunk threw his arm around him and Pidge.
“I see you’ve replaced me already Hunk.” Lance said jokingly.
“Please you know I’m just after the buy two get one free ice cream deal.” Hunk replied laughing.
“Ah I miss ice cream so much. Almost as much as you three are going to miss me until the next session.” Lance winked flirtingly causing Keith to cringe.
“Yeah miss you like the plague.” Pidge smirked.
“Ah you know you love me young pigeon.” Lance laughed obnoxiously ruffling Pidge’s hair.
“That’s a filthy lie and you know it.” She snapped without any real venom.
“Babe get your ass over here.” A tall man with incredibly long white hair leaned in the door way with a hand on his hip.
Lance’s grin grew as he did as he was told.
The man leaned down wrapping his arms around Lance possessively and kissing him on the top of the head locking eyes with Keith.
“Hey babe go get me a drink I something ok.” He said tilting Lance’s face up to him.
Lance blushed and nodded before running off eagerly down the hall to the drinks machine.
“So who’s this little cutie?” He asked cocking his hip to one side as he ran a finger along Keith’s jaw line.
Keith jerked away staring at his guy who must of been Lance’s boyfriend. “The names Keith and don’t touch me.”
“Oh a feisty little kitten I like that.” He chuckled “well Keith it is simply wonderful to meet you. I am-”
“This is Lotor, he’s Lance’s boyfriend.” Hunk sounded strange. Like he was… angry. Keith didn’t know Hunk very long but he just didn’t seem like the kind of guy that could be angry at anyone every.
Lotor glared at Hunk before his seductive smile returned “as the fatty said I am indeed with Lance… for now.” He winked and Keith felt very uneasy.
He didn’t like what he had called Hunk and despite Lance’s flaws he felt like he could do better then this jerk. But it wasn’t really his place.
“Shut up Lotor Hunks perfect!” Pidge yelled taking a step forward and had to be held back by Hunk to stop her from taking a swing at the man.
“Oh yes I’m sure he is. And that’s why Lance is hanging around him and not me.”
“You know what!” Pidge shrugged Hunk off and looked ready to pounce when Lance returned holding a bottle of coke.
She stopped in her tracks and Keith couldn’t understand why.
Why would Lance being there stop her from defending Hunk?
“Ah thanks babe.” Lotor took the drink kissing him on the head before taking a sip, which he promptly spat out and threw the bottle against the wall causing everyone to jump.
“You know I have diet!”
“Sorry bae I’ll erm… I.”
Lotor sighed “oh my sweet idiot, your lucky your so pretty, no one else would put up with you.”
“Guess im lucky you love me then.” Lance joked but Keith saw a slight shake to his hands and a nervous glance to Hunk.
“Yeah sure I do. To make it up to me you buy some me dinner.” Lotor purred grabbing Lance by the wrist and pulling him out.
“Ok… sure.” Lance glanced over his shoulder waving “I guess I’ll see you guess next session.”
With that he was gone.
“Wow…” Keith mumbled in shock.
“Yeah… Worst thing is it’s the happiest I’ve seen Lance in a very long time.” Hunk said staring after Lance like all he wanted to do was wrap him up and keep him safe from the world.

———————————————part 1: https://langsty-mc-langstface.tumblr.com/post/160449627965/youll-miss-me-when-i-go
“Bruce...sucks” - Bruce Wayne x Reader

Summary : The women of the League are teasing you about the love bites that litter your body….

I already kinda had the idea of doing a similar story on the women side…So here we go. Last time the guys of the League were mocking Bruce for the scratches on his back (you can read that here), now, it’s Batmom’s turn (though I feel it’s not as funny as the other, I tried something else you know, so that the stories wouldn’t be exactly the same, too similar and shit…erf, whatever, hope it’s kinda ok). Hope you’ll like it (insecuritiesoverloadbutitsok) 

WARNING FOR LANGAGE and slightly NSFW, just slightly. Also, My masterlist blog here : https://ella-ravenwood-archives.tumblr.com

__________________________________________________

It wasn’t really part of your initial plan to shower at the same time than them. Bruce told you about his friends trying to tease him about the nail marks you left on his body after a heated night, and you were afraid that your girl friends would do the same, a bit paranoid about it really…

But then you thought about the fact that usually, women tended to be a bit more mature about that (maybe?), that they would probably behave and ignore the hundreds (literally) love bites on your body. 

Besides, there was only Diana, Zatanna and Dinah, surely, they wouldn’t say anything, after all, they were used to Bruce being affectionate towards you when he thought no one was watching, small love bites wouldn’t shock them or anything. They were your three best friends, they knew how to not intrude too much in your life. They would definitely not talk about the marks your husband left on your body. 

And oh you were so wrong. 

You were in your underwear when you started to notice their smirks, and the way they whispered in each other’s ears while looking at you. No…could it be ?

You turn around, and when Diana’s eyes go wide at the sight of the love bites on your front while Zatanna and Dinah just start laughing stupidly, you know you actually were right to “fear” a reaction from them. You roll your eyes and give them your best “really ?” facial expression before saying :

-Are you guys snickering like idiots because of the love bites ? 

Zatanna answers your question :

-No, we’re snickering like idiots because Bruce…

And then it happens. The worst pun you ever heard in your life (and you were used to Dick and Tim’s nerdy jokes). All three of them yell : 

-SUCKS !

Stun. That’s what you are. Wow. Even worst that the poor attempt from your male friend in the league to embarrass Bruce. An awful pun. 

Keep reading

12x20 Coda: Pick Me Up

He remembers sitting in an inn with Sam and Dad like this.  Except said inn was probably older than the United States, and it was winter in Vermont, and instead of wine and music and light conversation, it was cheap beer and the blueish glare of the TV and dead silence.

Okay, so it was nothing like this, really.  But he can’t help but reminisce as he watches the siblings and their mother talk seamlessly, as if it’s somehow possible to come up with topics of conversation not related to their mutual job of stabbing things without struggling.

All right.  Maybe that is possible, but not for the Winchesters.

Dean’s halfway through his second glass of wine—yeah, okay, it’s not half bad—when he feels the couch dip beneath him as Max lowers himself into the free space.  Max doesn’t look over at him, but his knee keeps bumping Dean’s as he continues talking to his mother and sister.  How old is this kid again?

Eventually, the two women get up and start moving towards the doorway.  Dean, who’d been wrapped up in the steady hum of conversation and the unexpected fact that Max has been migrating towards him for the past ten minutes or so, snaps out of his reverie.

“Mom thinks she can help me with the rattling noise in the Jeep,” Alicia says by way of explanation.  Her eyes light up as she teases him. “Because you were so useless at fixing it.”

“Yeah, yeah.” Max waves the insult off.  Then, with a wolfish grin in Dean’s direction: “I’ll just keep Dean here company.”

By the time Alicia and Tasha have left, there’s a hand on his knee.  Dean raises his eyebrows.

“I thought you had a date tonight.”

Max shrugs. “I’m flexible.”

Oh God.  Not that Dean hasn’t used bad pick-up lines in his time, but that was pretty damn awful.  Max must be able to read it in his face, because he retracts his hand.

“I’m sorry.  I thought maybe—”

This is the point where Dean would usually laugh and agree that Max isn’t exactly his type, but something stops him.  For once in his life, he’s alone with a guy who has had the same experience that he’s had.

“No.  I mean—that’s not the—”

Max cuts him off. “I get it.  Don’t meet a lot of hunters who have that, though.”

For the life of him, Dean can’t figure out what he’s talking about. “What?”

“Boyfriend.  Girlfriend. Non gender conforming significant other. Whatever.”

Keep reading

The Boyfriend/Girlfriend Tag!(Calum Edition)

1. Where and when did we first meet?

“We meet at your concert” I say first “on like a Christmas show, three years ago”

“Yeah, it’s a interesting story actually” he says getting in place to tell the story “you were wearing a Christmas suit, like an actual Christmas sweater and Christmas tights, and I was like ‘shoutout to the only girl who is reflecting the real Christmas spirit”

“Hell yeah” I chuckle “and then we talked for the first time at the venue, it  was so late, like 3 am”

“Yeah, it was fun though” he comments “and I was shocked when you told me you are a voice actress”

I laugh “you say that all the time” I pinch his cheek “you’re cute”

2. Where was our first date?

“To be honest, I don’t remember”

I say being surprised of myself.

“You don’t?” He says surprised too “i do know, we went to watch a movie together at my apartment”

I look at him and the memories come to my mind “oh that’s right!” I smile “yeah it was a nice first date, we watched the origin, remember?”

“Yep” he says “best movie ever”

3. What was your first impression of me?

“To be completely honest, I did not like you at first” I say feeling a bit ashamed “Well, at least not like romantically”  

“It was kind of the same for me” he admits “I thought you were a fun girl, but I wasn’t really thinking on getting involved with you, until like the fifth time we hung out”

4. When did you meet my family?

“When we had our one year anniversary ” I say “we flew to Australia and I met them” I start thinking “I don’t really remember when you met my family”

He nods “I think it was on Christmas”

“Yeah” I agree “our first Christmas”

5. Who said “I love you” first?

“I did” Calum said with a bright smile “on our first Christmas”

“And I cried” I add up making him laugh

“Sometimes she’s just a big baby” he scoffs and I act offended.

“Boy” I start “Listen, this is my channel, I can destroy you here and now” I say on a funny voice getting close to his ear “I’m not a baby”  

6. What dressing do I always wear?

“For you” I start looking at him up and down. “Black jeans every freaking day” I laugh “and boots”  

He nods “it’s weird not to wear them” he says

“And it’s weird to not see you in them” I chuckle “what do I always wear?” I ask him.

He looks at me and his hand goes to his chin “You always wear converse” he says kind of guessing and I nod “and Vans, you love Vans”

“Correct!” I cheer “next question”

7. Weird habit of each other?

“You laugh is weird” I say almost instantly.

He frowns and nudges me “that’s not a habit! Weirdo” he laughs.

“Yes it is!” I fight back “you used to… laugh differently”

“Not true” he denies “and you’re worst habit is talking on weird voices all the time”

I try to argue with this but I can’t  "I like doing it, it’s fun"

“It is” he nods “but admit it, it’s too much”

8. What I often do in my free times?

“You spend a lot of times just playing guitar or whatever instrument is around” I answer “I personally enjoy that a lot”

He smiles and leans to kiss my cheek “thanks baby” he mumbles “I don’t know about you though, you are always doing so much stuff” he says not being sure what to say “so I am going to say that you like read over your old scripts quite often”

“Well, yeah” I shrug “it’s fun to do it, I like it because I practice and remember stuff”

9. How long have we been together?

“2 years” we say at the same time.

10. What was our first road trip?

“Well” I chuckle shrugging at the same time “for starters, I hate road trips”

“Aw” Calum says pinching my cheek “I like them, to be honest” he said “our first one was… to vegas?”

“Yep!” I confirm “For my birthday!”

“It was incredibly wild” he comments with a smile.

“I know!” I say in a weird voice.

11. First thing you noticed about me?

“Again” he starts “as I mentioned already, we first met at my Christmas country and she was dressed… very Christmassy (maybe way too much)” he comments looking up and remembering the moment “so it would be that”

“I looked fantastic” I brag jokingly “I remember the first thing I noticed about you was your blond hair strip, I liked it a lot”

“Really?” He looks at me almost as he didn’t believed me “I mean it was okay, but i don’t know” he shrugs “not for me”

I kiss his cheek and go back to the questions.

12. What pisses you off?

“In general? Or about each other?” I ask confused from reading the question.

“In general, I don’t want to know what pisses you off about me” he says in a fake annoyed tone, rolling his eyes and pressing his lips. Making me laugh.

“Well I know that what always pisses you off is when people asks like inappropriate questions, right?” I say almost guessing

“Hm” he says thinking “not quite but I’ll take it” he says.

“What do you think it pisses me off all the time?” I ask him.

“I think it’s when you’re at the studio” he starts “and the director tells you like too many times that you’re doing awful” he explains “I’ve been there”

“Oh my god” I exclaim, it was so accurate “yes, I always put like a lot of personality in characters and I absolutely hate when they want me to make them sound boring”

“You are a good voice actress babe, don’t worry” he kisses my cheek.

13. What I’m not good at?

“You’re terrible at trivia games” I say laughing “that’s the only thing I could think of, but yeah, you’re so bad at it”

“What do you want? I dropped out of school” he chuckles “and for you I would say it is… drawing?” He guesses.

“Yeah” I nod “I suck at that”

14. What I’m good at?

“Again!” He exclaims for no reason “playing with your voice, it’s your job after all”

“Oh cmon, you picked an easy one” I pout and nudge him “it’s only fair for me to answer that you are good at music in general”

“Wise decision” he smile

15. Favourite feature about each other?

“I love that your cheeks are so squishy and voluptuous” chuckle pinching both of his cheeks on my hands “it’s fun to just play with them”

“Thanks” he mumbles taking my hands off his face “I like your eyes, and your sense of humour” he smiles to me and kisses my hands “that’s for sure my favourite things about you”

16. What do we argue about the most?

“We don’t argue often” he says confident, passing his arm around my shoulders “but if I had to say one, I’d say when we have to cook or wash dishes”

“ugh yes” I say rolling my eyes “we take turns but we mess up the order all the time”

“It’s your turn today” he chuckles looking down at me.

“No it’s not!” I exclaim in a high pinched voice too close to his ear.

17. Do I have any weird obsessions?

“You have a weird obsession with puppies” I say laughing “I don’t know why”

He nods, accepting is “they’re cute so yes”  he smiles “and you… maybe with movies? I don’t know”

“Em, not really” I shrug “to be honest, I don’t even know, so next question”

18. Nicknames for each other?

We both shake our heads no “ I don’t have a nickname for you” I say first “i can’t really think of one”

“Me neither, I just stick with sweet names and stuff” he says nodding “next question, please”

19. What is my favorite restaurant?

“Basic one” he says raising his eyebrows “McDonald’s”

“Hell yeah” I smile “and yours? Hm” I stop thinking “You like Italian restaurants” I say shrugging.

“Is that all your answer?” He raises his eyebrows.

“Yeah” I mimic him.

“You’re right and at the same time, not” he chuckles “but I’ll give you that one”

20. Complete this sentence “You’re my……..”?

“Worst nightmare” I joke leaning my head on his shoulder and rounding my arms around his waist

“Oh wow” he says laughing “how positive”

He chuckles “I’m gonna say..” he mumbles “Netflix and chill partner” he says proud of his answer “because I’m not a mean boyfriend”

BamBam: enemies to lovers

idk how I feel about this but oh well I HAVE A DATE

  • so first impressions go a long way
  • and you and BamBam sort of fucked up first impressions 
  • you had been telling your friend about some serious thing in your life
  • not really in the mood for jokes or light hearted things ya feel
  • well BamBam walks up because he knows your friend apparently
  • and references some random inside joke they have
  • laughs his ass off, too
  • so you’re pissed because dude, read the atmosphere
  • and you scowl and roll your eyes
  • because wow is he really that dense what a typical boy
  • he doesn’t like you that much either because wow do they have a stick up their ass or what
  • so ever since then, you’ve been really cold with each other 
  • you only ever see each other through mutual friends but when you do it’s a nightmare
  • everything he says seems to be the worst possible thing to say at that moment, right
  • to him, you’re a stone-cold bitch
  • to you, he’s an arrogant, big-headed prick
  • he can’t take anything seriously
  • you take everything too seriously
  • he won’t!!!!! stop!!!!!!! dabbing!!!!!!!!
  • he thinks you need to loosen up 
  • the night always ends with you two locked in some argument over something stupid and your mutual friends are sick of it
  • they stop inviting you two to the same places
  • which you love at first
  • now you can actually talk to people without being interrupted because of some weird joke
  • peace at last
  • but something is off
  • it’s quieter than usual
  • much less lively and entertaining 
  • and it hits you that you actually sort of miss arguing with that piece of shit
  • you’re sort of disgusted with yourself for it tho
  • one day a friend mentions that bambam went and bought them burgers when they were really stressed about something without them even asking 
  • and they’ve got this smile and you can tell the gesture was really appreciated 
  • and suddenly 
  • maybe bambam isn’t actually the biggest jerk on the planet
  • which is good !!! because he’s beautiful and if he were a jerk it’d honestly be a serious waste 
  • next time you see him is when you’re waiting for your coffee at a cafe
  • and you hear his voice behind you so you whip around to find him ordering coffee
  • you’re just sorta staring 
  • because what. is he doing here
  • he turns around and sees you and his face makes this weird expression and stutters out something weird
  • “uhhhhhhh, ummmmmmmm, yeah, uh, so-” 
  • and you just blurt out, “I’m sorry I hated you.” 
  • and then beat yourself up because that was so out of the blue what were you thinking
  • he smiles 
  • “I don’t actually hate you, either.” 
  • you two decide to talk over your coffees together even though there’s places you need to be
  • and it’s nice
  • because there’s so much you didn’t know about him
  • and he’s full of weird stories about his group of friends that make you lose your shit
  • pretty soon, though, you’re either going to have to keep buying coffee or leave because the staff seems to want you two GONE
  • so you exchange numbers so you can ‘continue the conversation’ 
  • which, naturally, was all his idea
  • because he thinks you’re really cute and cool and he hates that he wasted so much time not getting along with you 
  • and right before you part ways, he sort of lightly takes your hand
  • without even realizing it
  • gets flustered af because why did his body betray him like this?????? 
  • he was gonna play it cool but that’s not possible anymore
  • and then he’s like well they already hated me once how much do i stand to lose
  • so he’s blushing like a madman and he just goes for it
  • “Um, Y/N. I actually think you’re super cute. I never actually hated you, really. Do you want to go get dinner or something? No pressure, I just-” 
  • and you kiss his cheek to shut him up
  • because yes, you’ll totally go for dinner with him
  • he might offer to go right then and there if you’re cool with that
  • he’s so so so so so happy that you gave him a second chance and is determined not to fuck it up
  • will be the best boyfriend everrrr
  • but that’s not to say you two are done arguing 
  • you’re forever gonna be that couple 
  • and it’s wonderful 
Tags

You and Dan do a tag video for the internet

Dan switched the camera on.

His arm rested comfortably on my shoulders, his side pressed nice and warm to mine. The blinding lights used for recording were up and making the both of us sweat. Before he said anything I turned and looked at his profile. He had that same anticipatory look in his eyes whenever he started recording a video. He and I were wearing matching shirts, like the losers we were, but he honestly filled it out so much nicer. Designer looked so good on him. Probably feeling my eyes on him, he looked down at me. “You ready to film another garbage video for my garbage channel?” I smiled and nodded, pecking his lips softly and redirecting my attention toward the camera.

“Hello Internet, today I’m here with my beautiful y/n!”

He gestured to you and you waved awkwardly. He’d been speaking into a camera lens for years, while you had only been in a few of his videos, so you weren’t as seamless as him. “Uh, hey there internet, you look nice today.” Dan chuckled at how uncomfortable I sounded, and squeezed me for a second then rubbed his hand up and down my arm a few times. “Today we’re, surprisingly, not talking about how much of a loser I am or the inevitability of death coming to us all.”

“He’s already done enough of that today off camera.”

“Fuck off. Today, we’re doing what everyone wants in 2017: a tag video!”

The two of us did a cute little pretend cheer and celebration because no one did tagged videos past the year 2014. What could we say, we were into retro trends. “Yeah, it seems like lots of you still have questions about me and Dan’s relationship, and while we’re not ready to go into the tying up and choking kinks yet, we can answer some basic stuff, right Dan?” I looked at him expectantly. He just stared at me with disgust on his face. It was still pretty adorable, and I leaned in to steal a kiss quickly. “This is when you say yes and then start reading the questions,” I reminded him. He blinked and then seemed to shake off the daze I put him in. “We totally have to edit that shit out. Anyway!” He pulled up the list on his phone. “We’re going to answer a few of these ‘Boyfriend Tag’ questions for you all.” Without further ado, he started.

Where did you meet?

“Y/n and I met online, like true millennials.”

“Yeah, I had messaged Dan on some weird fandom site we both liked and he actually replied assuming I was a Phan. In reality, I was just asking him if he knew about some new merch and had no idea Danpire90 was actually him.”

“Wow way to expose the username and my creepy internet habits!”

You only smiled.

Where did you meet each other’s parents?

“Well, as some of you might know, I’m not from England. I’m actually from America. So Dan and I were together for like a year and a half before we both took the trip across the Atlantic to meet my family. He was completely awkward and swore in front of my grandmother.”

“That’s not even the worst part! Your dad threatened me at the dinner table and when I laughed cuz I thought it was a joke everyone in your family looked at me with like deep seriousness. I thought I wasn’t going to last the night!”

“Yeah, Dan’s parents were so much more chill. They were just glad to ‘see their sad baby boy happy and settled down’.” Dan sighed, embarrassed just remembering when they said that. 

What’s something you hate that the other person does?

“Dan you can probably guess mine.” He looked in my eyes like he was trying to read my mind. I just gave him a playful little smile. His eyes crinkled when he had his answer. “Is it when I leave floss everywhere?”

“It’s absolutely when you leave dental floss everywhere!” Dan fell to the side laughing at me. “No but guys seriously he will literally floss like 25 times a day and leave that shit on every surface and it’s like finding hair and a spider web at the same time like that’s so nasty!” You were serious about this, years of living with Dan meant you had accepted it, but that didn’t mean you liked seeing used floss all the time. Dan wiped his eyes and kissed your cheek. “Sorry I always do nasty things, pumpkin. But if we’re being honest, your snoring is one of the worst things on Earth and you can’t even change that.” You had to agree with him. He’d shown you the recordings of it, and you sounded like an old man.

What is your s/o’s style?

“Black. Anything black,” you said. Deadpan. Dan couldn’t even argue. “And you wear what, anything that’s ugly?” Dan stuck his tongue out at you. You poked his ribs and pouted your lip. “It’s called unique you monochrome loser.”

Is your s/o loud or quiet in bed?

“Oh some of these are naughty, fam,” I giggled. Dan made another disgusted face at me. “Don’t ever say fam you trash heap.” I ignored him, putting actual thought into the question. “Uh I don’t really think Dan is loud…you don’t make much sound and when you do it’s like those super deep moans like-” I tried to demonstrate how he sounded when in the middle of sex, but from Dan’s burst of laughter I must’ve sounded like I had a burp trapped in my chest or something. “I’m not a fuckin bear!”

“I know I know but I can’t do the thing!”

“Oh fuck off!”

We were giggling for like a minute before Dan started regaining composure. “I guess you’re right. Now that I think about it I don’t make much noise. And you’re just like ‘and IIIIIIIIIIIII-” I smacked my hand over his mouth and knocked us both to the side and slightly out of frame. “Daniel James Howell that is so untrue!”

What’s the first thing your s/o does in the morning?

“Well it’s obvious, Dan brushes his teeth because he has actual OCD.”

“And y/n glues herself to me and steals my body heat because she’s cold blooded.”

Favorite cereal?

“What a random question, this shit was definitely made in 2013 or something,” Dan mumbled. I leaned my head against his shoulder. “I honestly have no idea what weird British inedible cereal Dan likes but for all my American viewers, Cinnamon Toast Crunch all the way!” Dan faked chest pains, “American cereal is just sugar and the occasional bran flake. You seriously don’t know my favorite cereal? You and Phil steal it all the time and you still don’t even know what you’re eating? Well, I’m not telling you, you’ll just be eating mystery cereal forever.” I shrugged, that was fine with me.

Kiss your partner right now, who’s more aggressive?

Before I’d finished reading the question aloud Dan had his hand on my cheek and a tongue in my mouth. I moaned, taken aback for half a second then reciprocating just as hard, trying to overpower him and leaning forward. We made out much longer than we probably needed to answer the question before I remembered we were actually in the middle of a task. Pulling back, we just stared at each other and then broke out into laughter. “That cannot go on youtube! We’re gonna get flagged!” Dan said.

Who said I love you first?

“Believe it or not, it was actually Dan. He’s secretly a huge romantic softie when he’s not on camera.” We met each other’s eyes, and I was talking to him and not the camera anymore. “We were on a date and it was raining too hard to leave. So then suddenly the power goes out in the place and everyone is scared and bear just pulled me close and whispered ‘I love you’ in front of everyone there. The people around us were like ‘aww’. It nearly made me cry, mostly because all that attention was embarrassing.” Dan giggled and kissed me softly. Wow, we were doing a lot of that in this video. It was usual to keep our relationship private, we weren’t even into the whole PDA thing when we were out in public. I guess either the Phans would have enough cute material to last a lifetime or Dan had a lot of editing to do.

We pulled apart and I ran my fingers through his curls. “I think that’s probably enough questions, bear.” I was done doing this filming thing, ready to just relax with Dan and snuggle on the sofa or something. Dan agreed and we turned back to the camera one more time.

“Okay that’s enough looking into our lives. Thanks for watching us make fools of ourselves and expose each other. If you liked this video, or if you thought this video was too happy for my channel, consider subscribing for infrequent depressing videos. Leave a like if you enjoyed, as well. Talk to you guys next time. Bye!”

He got up and turned off the camera, exported the SD card, and went to edit it.

Hours later, we were relaxing together and I was doing what I always did whenever he uploaded. I checked through the comments. Most of them were like always, overwhelmingly supportive and gushing over how cute Dan and I were.

“I’ve never seen the tall bean look this happy.”

“…was Dan supposed to edit out that question about the kissing?”

“They’re the most wholesome parents I could’ve ever asked for”

“I thought you were going to edit out the kissing question.” Dan put his phone down and looked at the comment you highlighted. “Yeah, I was. But then the more I watched it the less I wanted to take it out, we looked pretty good. Did you want it taken out?” You shook your head. He was the one who always liked privacy, you couldn’t really care less. “If you want to show the world how much you love me, I’m not complaining.”

“I really do love you, pumpkin. And I always want the world to know it.”


If I was dating Dan all I would want is to do a tagged video with him…among other things.

Got something for me to write? Requests are open here and here

Imagine Chris taking you to Rome for a romantic getaway. (Part B)

A/N: Part 5B 😊 You can read the previous parts here: (Little Ones - Part 1/Part 2/Part 3/Part 4/Part 5A) and (Drunk Minds, Sober Hearts; Baby Fever; and Memory Lane - Masterlist) Enjoy. X

Chris’ eyes scanned across the array of gelato flavors, making soft sounds with his lips as he tried to decide; a splitting image of Jack when he had to decide over an array of cereals. You wrapped your arm around Chris’, chuckling softly. “You know I thought leaving Jack behind meant not having to go through this, but you are just the same.”

“Okay,” he chuckled. “I don’t see you with gelato,” he retorted, “have you decided?”

“Yeah,” you laughed and pointed at the register where your two scoops were waiting patiently in a cup; you’d decided on ‘Pistachio’ and 'Dark Chocolate’ wanting to stray away from your go-to flavors 'Cookies & Cream’ and 'Salted Caramel’. “And it’s melting, so hurry it up.” You pulled away from him and walked over to the register so you could start eating while Chris decided.

“Your husband hasn’t changed, has he?” Lorenzo, the owner, laughed softly as the two of you watched Chris. You’d met and befriended Lorenzo on your honeymoon four years ago. He’d loved you and Chris, saying the two of you reminded him of him and his late wife when they were young and knee-deep in-love.

“Nope,” you shook your head, smiling.

“Can I try the tiramisu, please?” He asked the attendant then looked over at you, smiling when you chuckled at him. You both already knew what flavors he was going to walk out with; 'Cookies and Cream’ and 'Coffee’. He stuck with what he knew and loved, but he also liked trying everything else first which made the process grueling. “Oh, this is nice. What’s that one in the back like?” He quizzed, getting another small taste test.

You were almost halfway through yours when he finally ordered his usual after tasting another four flavors. He was lucky he was Captain America and the owner was a friend, otherwise they’d kick him out for trying almost every flavor in their display case. After Chris paid for the gelato with a massive tip, you both thanked Lorenzo for his hospitality and made your way out of their store and onto the streets of the beautiful city of Rome which hadn’t changed since your last visit. Rome was always going to hold a special place in both your hearts as it was where you’d spent your honeymoon, and so far- this trip was proving to be just as magical.

“What would you like to do today?” Chris asked, draping an arm around you; he’d squish you every time he tried to spoon ice-cream into his mouth, making you laugh. “Sorry,” he chuckled and you smiled, kissing his jaw. “Anyway, what would you like to do today? We can hit up all the spots we did when we honeymooned, redo Rome?”

“I don’t mind as long as I’m redoing Rome with you.”

“You’re sweeter than my gelato, you know that?” He smiled and kissed the side of your head. “Okay then, I’ll tour guide the trip. First stop…” He trailed off, taking a moment to ponder. “Oh, yes. What do you say we go recreate our kiss photo on the Spanish Steps?”

“That’s really cheesy, Chris,” you made a face, trying not to laugh as you teased him.

“Yeah,” his face fell slightly as he tried to make his case, “but that’s one of my favorite pic-”

“I’m kidding,” you giggled and he smiled, “I’d love to.” You tip-toed and pecked him on the lips.

“Guess I’m not the only one who hasn’t changed,” he chuckled, squishing you again as he nursed his gelato. “You’re still as cheeky as ever.” He scooped the tiniest bit of gelato onto his spoon. “But then again, so am I.” He poked you in the nose with his gelato then pulled away from you, laughing when you scoffed. “You’ve got a bit of-” he choked on his laughter, grabbing his left pec. “Hey, no!” He dodged your attempt to get back at him, still bellowing with laughter as he jogged a small distance away from you.

“I’m going to get you back,” you warned playfully, trying not to smile.

Despite the fact that you’d been together for nine years and were parents now, things between the two of you were still exciting and lively, fun and playful. It didn’t matter how many more years were yet to come, you and Chris both knew that you wouldn’t become one of those boring, old married couples with nothing to do and nothing to talk about. There was a promise made to always keep the romance alive, it didn’t matter how big or small the gesture was- it was the thought and the effort that counted. You’d both lived up to it so far- Chris going above and beyond with this trip- and you’d continue to live up to it as long as you were together.

“Aw, baby,” he cooed, pouting mockingly, “I am sure you will.” You tried not to laugh as you pursed your lips tightly. “C'mere, you messy girl.” He walked back over to you, using the back of his hand to wipe the gelato from your nose. “There we go,” he wiped his hand on his jeans, “back to perfection.”

“But now your jeans are sticky.”

“Yeah, but what’s new around you?” He smirked and you burst into laughter; he laughed as you playfully shoved him. “Wow, that was so crude,” he laughed, wrapping an arm around you as the two of you continued towards the Spanish Steps. “Oh my God, I am so sorry. It’s like I just have a constant stream of bad jokes in my head,” he chuckled.

“I can’t say that was your worst though,” you said; he chuckled when you did. “Aren’t you lucky I married you anyway?” You teased, looking up and smiling at him. Believe it or not, you lived for his terrible jokes; just like he lived for your perfectionism. Those things were part of who you were, part of the reason why one fell for the other. It may have been annoying to others, but it was adorable to you and Chris.

“Incredibly,” he smiled.

You found the Spanish Steps like you did the last trip, around the corner from Lorenzo’s gelato store. There were many tourists like the two of you taking photos and eating gelato on the steps, it was one of the must-see places when one visited Rome. You and Chris finished your gelato and tossed the paper cups away before you went in search of the spot you’d taken your kiss photo four years ago. It wasn’t that hard to find, Chris had it seared in his mind; it was his favorite photo after all. It was his phone’s background up until the birth of Jack, then he’d changed it to the photo that Jimmy Fallon showed at the interview; the one of the four of you. Chris looked around for someone to help take the photo, American tourists found you first.

“Oh my God, it’s Chris Evans and Y/N Y/L/N,” a girl in her twenties and her friends lit up at the sight of the two of you. “This is amazing! We’re such huge fans!” You and Chris smiled. “Do you want us to help you guys take a photo?”

“That’d be awesome,” Chris nodded and passed them his phone before rejoining you. “What?” He chuckled when you chuckled, burying your face in his chest. “Are you embarrassed?” He teased, poking your side as he wrapped his arms around you like he did the last time.

“Aren’t you, Mr. I-hate-the-limelight?”

“Never when I’m with you,” he told you, smiling. “When you’re around, you’re all I see. Why do you think I do red carpet events so well around you? It’s 'cause you’re the only thing I think about, I focus on you and everything else just fades away.”

“Aw,” you smiled. “Okay then, let’s take this photo and give your fans a story to tell.” He chuckled and looked over at the girls, nodding at them before drawing you in for a passionate kiss. You could hear them squealing as the camera flash went off. You wanted to laugh at their reaction but Chris’ kiss just took you to another dimension, giving the 'everything else just fades away’ experience. “Okay,” you giggled, breaking the kiss. “I think they got it.”

“I don’t think so,” he chuckled, giving you another quick kiss before pulling away to take his phone back from the girls. “Thank you, ladies. Y/N and I really appreciate the help,” he told them and they smiled at him before smiling at you. “Do you want a group photo before we go?” He asked, holding out his hand for you to take.

“Yes, please!”

Chris pulled you to his side, you both shared a smile before turning your attentions to one of the girls’ phones. The camera shutter went off and they thanked both of you before leaving you to your peace. Chris took your hand, leading you away from the Spanish Steps and onto your next destination. You chuckled softly when he entwined his fingers with yours.

“What?” He quizzed, chuckling softly.

“Nothing,” you shook your head. “I’m just wondering how long it’ll take for the guys to call when that photo goes viral,” you told him and he laughed. “They all know you very well, there’s no doubt that they’ll figure out the real reason for this trip.”

“There’s no real reason, there’s just one reason and that’s work.” He said and you laughed. “Work for my job of being the best husband ever,” he added, chuckling. “But what they don’t know won’t hurt them.”

“I love you,” you chuckled.

“I love you too,” he smiled.

Tags: @widowsfics @m-a-t-91 @xoxomioxoxo @imaginesofdreams @ateliefloresdaprimavera @katiew1973 @winter-tospring @shamvictoria11 @caitsymichelle13 @michellekeehlmello @chrisevans-imagines @letterstomyself21 @soymikael @faye22


Part 5C coming soon.

rikaart  asked:

Wedding riko and Mari! (♥ω♥*)(♥ω♥*)(♥ω♥*)(♥ω♥*)(灬♥ω♥灬)(灬♥ω♥灬)(灬♥ω♥灬)(灬♥ω♥灬)(灬♥ω♥灬)(灬♥ω♥灬)(๑・ω-)~♥”(๑♡∀♡๑)

Yaay, done!~ ♥ Hope you like it >w<
Never thought I’m going to edit my worst girl. 
PS it’s not Mari and it’s not joke

anonymous asked:

dating jongdae would be like?!?!

I got a little emotional I love Chen with my entire heart


  • this boy, okay, would think he was all discreet about liking you
  • but literally everyone and their grandma knew he liked you
  • even you knew it tbh
  • so it wasn’t a big surprise when he confessed and asked you to go on a date with him
  • he probably took you to lazer tag and was like “let’s be on a team and kick some ass”
  • and you were like “hell yeah”
  • and then the little snake totally betrayed you and ended up winning because of it
  • but that’s okay because that’s what makes Jongdae fun
  • like when the two of you go mini golfing and you almost make it in the hole but not quite and he silently pushes your ball the rest of the way in with his foot
  • “wow you’re so good at this you’ve gotten like ten hole-in-ones!”
  • super cheesy but it’s because he loves you
  • Jongdae would tell you the absolute worst jokes
  • like Chanyeol would tell him a joke and he’d be like “that’s not funny” but then turn around and tell you the exact same joke
  • honestly he would probably send you memes really late at night
  • not like two or three
  • but like twenty at a time
  • he would insist on playing with your hair no matter the length
  • “wow this looks so good I should go into cosmetology”
  • and your hair looks like bird’s nest
  • listen this boy would compliment you all the time
  • your cooking, your clothing, your everything
  • he would probably have deep talks with you late at night
  • the two of you would be laying in bed and he’d have you on top of him and you’d talk for hours
  • sometimes he’d lay on top of you and call it “cuddling”
  • Jongdae would probably talk about having kids with you someday
  • your relationship with Jongdae would be playful and fun always but he would also know when to be serious and wow he just really loves you with his entire being
My Reactions to Songs From Heathers

Beautiful- YESSS GIRL YOU EARNED THIS SLAY!!!

Candy Store- This is some sexy ass choreography I love it

Fight for Me- I have no clue who this kid is but I already love him

Freeze Your Brain- Calm down it’s just a 7-Eleven- WAIT WTF

Big Fun- This looks like fun, one might even call it… big fun *looks at the camera like in The Office*

Dead Girl Walking- Nice song but are we just gonna ignore the fact she broke into this guy’s house and demanded he have sex with her because that is not okay

The Me Inside of Me- Did they just
straight up murder this bitch and make her MORE popular?

Blue- Pardon me but what the fuck?

Our Love is God- Scratch that, what the FRICKETY FUCK? (Also is JD the best or worst boyfriend I can’t tell)

My Dead Gay Son- *screaming*

Seventeen- Okay. No more murder. Sure. Suuurrrrrreeee.

Shine a Light- Honey are you okay.

Lifeboat- Oh. My. GODDDDD.

Shine a Light (Reprise)- OKAY SO I WAS NEVER TOLD I WOULD FALL IN LOVE THIS IS UNFAIR

Kindergarten Boyfriend- Oh.

Yo Girl- fuckfuckfuckfUCKFUCK

Meant To Be Yours- *More screaming*

Dead Girl Walking (Reprise)- This is #3intense5me

I Am Damaged- Why must you hurt me in this way.

Seventeen (Reprise)- Wow. No joke, just awe in how great this musical was. Also how the flying FUCK is Veronica mentally stable after all of that.

How I Brought Up Allowance

I tried a new method tonight. I hate bringing up allowances and its definitely my biggest weakness as a sugar baby so this is a new tactic I tried last night to turn a basic average young gift daddy into my SD.


TACTIC 1 - AIM FOR THE HEART:

To start the evening off, I told him I wanted a chill night and do just dinner and then I was going to take him to my favorite spot in New York for drinks. Making him feel the night is about him.   I began the evening my usually charming self, extremely attentive, asking him about himself, work, friends, making jokes, etc pretending it’s our first date again. Then throughout the course of the appetizers, I casually bring up awful nights of being out partying and getting too drunk. Then I transitioned that into swapping awful dating stories (note: make sure yours relatively tame compared to his, don’t tell him the worst of the word or tactic can have an opposite effect), getting him to think about how much time has been investing in seeing me compared to how many shitty dates he’s been on and also think about wow, compared to other women I’ve dated she’s charming, intelligent and drop dead gorgeous. An absolute catch in every way. By the end of revisiting memory lane, he feels lucky to be with you without you saying - you’re lucky to be with me. The goal of this tactic is to make sure he remembers how much dating sucks when he’s as busy as he is. Young POTS have the advantage of being slightly attractive and thinking they could get any girl, break this down and by reminding him that just any girl is not you and finding one like you can be a difficult and time consuming task. 


TACTIC 2 - AIM FOR THE MIND:

Next, I changed the subject to something deep. Go deep and once you think that’s deep enough, go deeper. Go so intellectual you feel like you’re an under cover scientist or historian or politician and if you don’t bullshit this man on thinking you are an expert on this subject, he’s gonna find out you’re a spy. This is what you have trained for! Discuss the strongest topic in your wheelhouse at length. Science and technology is mine and just so happens to be this POTs favorite topic. He also mentioned one of his favorite things is debating the moralities and uses of new health technologies so we did that for over an hour during the meal and dessert, with me highlighting some of the most specific latest developments that I read about or listened to on Podcasts, asking questions that he didn’t know the answer to and challenging him mentally in ways he never thought a beautiful women could challenge him. This is proving yourself as a commodity and more than just eye candy. Make sure this conversation is as if you’ve been dating forever, have him picture himself being unable to stop this discussion with you because that’s how interesting and intellectually stimulating it is. 


TACTIC 3 - GO FOR THE KILL

Now I usually do this at the change of venue spot, over drinks. Also I respect the women who bring up allowance in a very professional business way where they outline their needs and wants and explain themselves at length and pretty much pull out a powerpoint presentation of why they need and want an SD. I don’t do that with young daddies, to me they don’t care, they only care about themselves and what can you do for me. I have however pulled some of the language from sugaring blogs I’ve read on here though, just tweaked it. This is what pretty much what I said after our second cocktail - “I’ve been having a lovely evening, I’m so glad we have this much fun together and so much chemistry. And now that we know we get along so well and of course I know you know all the projects I’m involved in and how busy we both are, I’d love to take this to its next level and start an allowance with you now I know we have this wonderful chemistry and you’ve proven yourself as wonderful company.” (Prior to this date, I texted him all week about four completely different projects I’m doing - being really positive and passionate about each one. Don’t complain about work because he’ll be like oh I’m helping her escape her stressful life. No, it should be the other way around.) Make an allowance sound like a natural transition. As if, this is completely normal and how things go and he’s made it - no earned, this next step, as if you weren’t even considering him for an allowance because he hadn’t proved himself yet. The idea is to get him to associate the allowance with this golden gate that he needs to open in order to unlock the next level in the relationship. He reached the checkpoint - that’s this conversation now he can either quit and its game over or continue playing and he’s having a really good time playing the game so far, he has the money, he knows how hard it is to date (from tactic 1), he knows how intellectually stimulating and gorgeous you are (from tactic 2) and all of that is playing on his mind as he weighs his decision.


TACTIC 4: CONFUSE THE TARGET:

After bringing that up, I tell him to think about it, don’t start throwing numbers around tonight (stole this line from another sugar baby) and let’s enjoy the rest of our evening. I’ve found bringing up allowance makes the man feel attacked and immediately on the defense mode. That sugar meme where the sugar baby goes “ hey so when are we going to talk allowance???$$$ “ and the sugar daddy goes “ I came here to have a good time and I honestly feel so attacked right now. “ LITERALLY, that’s how a man feels when you bring up the allowance on the first date or the third or the tenth date, there’s no good time to bring it up if he’s never given an allowance before. It’s a foreign object that’s not even on his radar and when you bring it up its like he’s cruising in a car that came to a screeching halt. So in order to not have the rest of the evening be about $$$$$ and him thinking “ was everything she did a lie to get money out of me?” (yes), I make sure to change the subject give him that to sit on and then make sure the evening to all about having a great time, drinks, dancing, etc. 

A few notes: I have not slept with this guy yet, been to his apartment or anything and this was our fourth date but I did not bring up sex = allowance. When discussing allowance, I stayed far away the sex topic but a man knows - next level - golden date = pussy. Next level equals pussy, not allowance equals pussy.

WARNING: This is equivalent to an untested drug at this point since I have no results. Test this method at your own risk and I’ll keep you updated on how my lab rab over here is doing. I just wanted to write down the recipe before I forgot.

AND ALSO

IN A WORLD WHERE WOMEN DO NOT GET SCREENTIME UNLESS IT IS TO BE A SIDEKICK AT BEST, A LOVE INTEREST AKA ‘EMOTIONAL MOTIVATION FOR THE MAN’ (BECAUSE YEAH WOW WHY WOULD WOMEN BE THEIR OWN CHARACTER OR HAVE VALUE OUTSIDE OF A ROMANTIC RELATIONSHIP???), OR THE OBJECT OF ALL THE MALE GAZE/THE BUTT OF EACH AND EVERY FEMINIST JOKE AT WORST, SEEING TWO POWERFUL WOMEN – TWO FIGHTERS, TWO SURVIVORS – SAVE!!! EACH!!! OTHER!!! IS SO IMPORTANT – THEY OPENED THEMSELVES UP ENOUGH TO CARE ABOUT EACH OTHER AND THAT WAS THEIR STORYLINE

OH AND BY THE WAY THEY SAVED THE GODDAMN GALAXY IN THE PROCESS AND TO ‘DISLIKE THIS SUBPLOT IMMENSELY’ MAKES YOU AN ENTITLED GARBAGE PERSON AND YOU CAN GET THE FUCKING FUCK OUT

anonymous asked:

WOW, you like Sherlock less than GoT? Maybe it's that I hate it too much, but I don't see how is Sherlock worse? Not saying it isn't, just didn't give it much tought/analysis, could you explain why?

Sure thing! (Sherlock fans who read my blog, this post may not be for you. You carry on enjoying your stuff.) Cut for extensive ranting about a show I really, really dislike.

Keep reading

Imagine telling Julian Albert, your older brother, that you are dating Barry Allen

Words: 628

Note: No one request this, I just love the dynamic between Barry and Julian. Enjoy! :) *The Flash 3x02 Spoiler-alert*

Originally posted by flashallens

“No, I can’t do this.” Barry shook his head, nervously pacing back and forth outside of his lab, “He will kill me if I tell him.”

“Oh come on, he is my brother, not a monster.” You rolled your eyes at Barry, “He will not eat you alive just for asking him something.”

“Yeah. But he is literally a grown-up Draco Malfoy.” Barry protested, lowering his voice in case Julian heard him, “He hates me and he don’t want to talk to me.”

“Well, I think right now is a good chance to break the wall between the two of you.” You shrugged, shoving Barry into the lab, “I’ll wait for your good news.”

Barry slowly approached Julian’s desk with a few testing steps. He cleared his throat, “Um… Hello…?”

“Yes. Hello, Mr. Allen.” Julian replied without looking at Barry, “I can still see you there and no, I don’t want your help, thank you.”

Barry inhaled deeply, strongly holding back his sudden desire to curse. The corner of his lips uncontrollably twitched a little.

He managed a good-natured face and tried again, “Actually, I need your help.”

“It’s the four words I seem to hear you most often say, Barry.” Julian stated, still burying his face into the case paper.

Barry’s gentle face just lasted for one second and he couldn’t help but roll his eyes at Julian.

“That and, ‘I hate that guy.’ Which, the feeling’s mutual.” Julian continued, finally lifting his head and landing his eyes on Barry.

“Okay, um, this is going to be hard for you, but I just, for a second, need you to imagine that we’re actually friends.” Barry asked with an unsure tone.

Julian paused what he was doing, staring at Barry unbelievably as if he just heard the most ridiculous request in the world.

“Can’t do it.” Julian answered curtly.

Barry kept reminding himself to stay calm and not use his super speed to throw this guy off the building.

“Friend-ly.” Barry added.

“Equally as challenging, Barry.” Julian tossed Barry an annoyed expression.

Barry was terrible in making friends with Julian. You shook your head and thought it’s time for you to get involved before Barry made things worse.

“How about imagine Barry is your brother-in-law?” You stepped inside the lab, revealing your presence to your older brother, Julian.

You took Barry’s hand and slightly squeezed it, silently telling Barry you got this.

“Y/N, what the hell?” Julian was completely stunned by the laced fingers of you and Barry.

“Yeah. Barry is my boyfriend.” You announced with a wide grin, proudly showing Julian the locked hands, “And we want to invite you to have a family dinner with us.”

“Oh hell no.” Julian shook his head as if he just heard the worst joke ever, “Are you saying you’re dating this guy?”

“Absolutely.”

“For all the men in this world, you choose Barry Allen?” Julian pinned his dislikable gaze on Barry, “He is always late for work, asking for help and he even stole sample from crime scene for god’s sake.”

“Wow, man, you’re just as rude as Draco Malfoy.” Barry struck back.

“Oh really? You haven’t met my father yet.” Julian sneered with a sly smile coiled on his lips, “Oh wait, are we going to have a family dinner together? I can’t wait to see how you interact with my father.”

“Um… Y/N?” Barry stammered, an insecure feeling started creeping up to his chest, “Who is your father? Please don’t tell me he is Voldemort.”

“Actually… I kind of forget to tell you…” You took a careful glimpse at Barry, secretly hoping he would not pass out after knowing your father’s identity, “Julian and I were adopted by Harrison Wells.”

And that’s all to drive Barry paralyzed.