worth my weight


Top 20 DCTV Characters (As Voted by My Followers) - #13. Ray Palmer
I get it, now. Camelot isn’t about history, it’s not even about some dusty old books that got a lonely kid through childhood. It’s about one. Noble. Idea. That we can all stand up for what’s right- No matter what.

When I started losing weight I noticed people started talking to me or being nicer to me and that my husband started being more affectionate towards me.

I would lay in bed and think “fuck man, people didn’t like me before because I was fat” and I would feel bad. The kind of bad that you feel in your bones, it makes your body ache. I didn’t like to think my worth was directly tied to my weight.

What I’ve come to realize is that it’s me. I’m nicer, im more approachable,I’m in better moods, I smile. People want to talk to me because I want to talk to people. My husband is more affectionate with me because I’m more affectionate with him.

They weren’t measuring my worth by my weight. I was :/

*calls research institute that only deals with rarest of endocrine cases and wonders if case is rare enough*

‘hi i have a genetic disease called the SDHD fault help me’ (heavily paraphrased)

‘oh that is very rare’

‘yes can you help me’

‘yes i think so can you get your doctor to give you an indefinite referral’

‘wait indefinite? oh, that’s right, it’s incurable’

‘yes, it is’

‘so my case is rare enough?’

‘yes, it is’

‘so i’ll probably see [desirable professor who has been recommended to me by desirable professor in Sydney but is extremely hard to see who only holds a clinic for two hours once a week and like at this point i’m pretty sure i’ll see Santa before i see him]?’

‘indeed it is his area and yes he is rarer than a unicorn but i think he’ll make an exception for your case.’

‘hey cool, i hope you have an awesome day thank you for helping me’

‘remember the referral needs to be indefinite.’

*hangs up*

my life is really weird at the moment.

Do y'all ever see positivity posts that you’re reading through like Heck Yeah positivity for all! And then you see like “white girls are beautiful” and you’re just like….. post ruined, there is no one telling white girls they’re ugly because they’re white.

I don’t need reassurances that being white makes me beautiful because literally the entire world is telling everyone that being white is beautiful.

Like, fuck yeah, tell me I have worth even though I’m physically disabled, or that my worth isn’t defined by my weight. But if you’re making positivity posts? They shouldn’t include people specifically because they are a part of a privileged group. The entire of media and culture tells us we are better for those attributes.

I don’t need positivity for the attributes that I am already getting privilege for! I need positivity for my marginalized identities.

anonymous asked:

Hey Hypaa! I don't know if you need this but I totally feel you in that "work is my life now, I only go home to sleep" thing. This used to be me before I quit and started studying in uni again. I regret not keeping my job now, though, because university is WAY harder and it's making me go nuts. Please keep being you and please keep working just as hard and don't forget to call it quits when you're down! We believe in you and your Ignis-loving trash ass!

Yes, it’s definitely something I needed to hear. I hate that we’re commiserating on something so shitty, but I wish you the best of luck in powering through uni and kicking ass all along the way. Working really is easier than school in a sense, but at least in school I felt like I had more time and energy to do things I liked (martial arts, video games, writing, etc). Now it’s like my job sucks the life out of me along with things in personal life compounding to the point where all I have energy for is listlessly scrolling through Tumblr or rage quitting a mobile game I stg I don’t know why I bother with this piece of shit, my blood pressure rises every time I waste a power up-


But I’m trying to get better. I made myself come home and clean part of the apartment I let go to shit in the past month or so, then I… promptly injured myself but like hey, progress is progress! Then I made myself write drabbles instead of just letting my depression steal my muse from me again, so… hopefully I can work myself out of this relatively pitiful cycle I’ve found myself in as of late.

You’re so sweet to have gone out of your way to reach out, anon. ❤️ I’ll try to keep thotting and smiling, just for awesome folks like y’all.

okay !! I thought it’d be best if I made something just to let people know what’s crackalacking with this blog. I haven’t GONE. for good, at least. I still ghost every now and then, but (hopefully) some have noticed my absence. I left for a couple of months because things weren’t too good for me. they still aren’t, but I’m finally working on that. I really appreciate the people still following this blog for being patient and sticking with me. I’m focusing on my mental health and general health at the moment so thanks for baring with me. I just wanted to let people know that I will definitely be coming back to this blog, within the next month if all goes well. I’ve been making icons in preparation and I’m going to come back all clean and naked like a new born baby. they’re not really clean they just came out of a vagina but that doesn’t matter. what matters is, things will be changing.

I know people don’t really care, but if you don’t, that’s fine, I’m talkin’ to the few who do. I’m going to come back when I’m ready. I’ve been considering archiving this blog and making a new one but I’m sticking with it. I currently have 450+ asks in my box which I’m going to sort the fuck through and what I’m probably going to do is start anew with everything. new threads, new starters. aside from threads with ship partners, those will stay and unless I really LOVE a thread I have going, it’ll probably get dropped. 

the past has honestly sucked. I’m going to clean out my following and I’m going to reinstate the whole “rping with who the fuck I want to” motto, because honestly ?? (I say honestly a lot, because I am a honest person) I’m learning how to not be a pushover okay. this isn’t because I’m an asshole, I have to manage time carefully and have a billion other blogs I’ve got to try and handle. another thing I’ll be changing is how I interact with duplicates. I will probably cease contact with duplicates. please hear me out when I say this. rping deadpool has sucked ass. I adore deadpool and he makes me who I am so it’s not like I’ve lost muse. but for numerous years I’ve been dealing with severe self confidence issues and a killer self hate which, as I said, I’m seeking help for. I am also dealing with paranoia which leads me to believe everyone is conspiring against me and no, this isn’t a self pity thing or a “I have this issue, and that issue, oh and this” list - I’m just explaining the situation. I won’t be interacting with duplicates because of this self hate thing. I don’t envy and I’m not petty and jealous over them, in fact, each individual deadpool is fantastic at what they do, and I’m so glad deadpool as a character is getting the love he deserves. but due to this ridiculous self confidence, I immediately compare myself to others and make myself feel fucking dreadful in the process. it is nothing personal. I mean I’ve had some bad experiences with duplicates but this is just an overall thing. I will also probably become more MOVIE DEADPOOL than anything else because, although I do have comic book knowledge, I am currently unable to read the comics because I am incapable of getting a job and don’t have any money. don’t start bitching. I’ve been to africa, I’ve worked with the poorest kids there, shut the fuck up. we all have our issues on different levels. but I’m rambling. 

you can still reach me in ims or asks though I’m currently over here . I know those who enjoy and appreciate this blog will (hopefully) bare with me and stick around, but yeah, I just wanted to address the situation because I really do love this blog and am planning to come back new and improved but it’s just taking a little time. I love those who have stuck around and if you actually give a shit about this blog then just stick for a little longer <3 stay happy, healthy and safe all.

When I finish The Vapor Variant I want to get it printed and bound. Is that even a thing? I know it’s ridiculous because I haven’t purchased a paper book in years since I got a Kindle, but… I want to HOLD it in my hands, you know?

Also, anyone following along who is enjoying The Vapor Variant… gonna take another minute to thank my amazing betas – @thats-for-me-to-know for helping plug my big plot holes and @hotshoeagain for the fine-tooth-comb editing and suggestions and characterization checks that put the real shine on my work. The hot mess you’d all be reading without these two… I shudder to think.

Originally posted by thelostsmiles

im buying a macbook air 2017 today!! im so excited!!

An Ideal Sister Chapter 1

Altertale version fanfiction by @arstudios2000

Original comic, An Ideal Brother, by VanGold (link to cover page): http://vangold.deviantart.com/art/An-Ideal-Brother-Cover-647300614

Chapter 1: Eureka

“Can you keep a promise?” 

Toriel looked up at Sans. She was sitting on his lap, with a ham and cheese hotpocket in her hand. Sans himself was holding a pepperoni hotpocket. He still had that smile on his a face, that smile which Toriel liked to see. But the expression of his eyes were sad.

“Keep a promise?” Toriel repeated, looking at the skeleton’s face. “Of course I keep all my promises! My word is worth its weight in my brother’s tea! Which would be something if it weigh anything, instead of being an abstract concept….” She mumbled.

It had happened just this morning, without warning, that Toriel and the one behind the big door to the Ruins were once again passing jokes between each other, when the voice on the other side had grown silent. Toriel got curious as to what happened, when the door opened on it’s own, and she was beheld the sight of a tall, 6 foot 9 inches skeleton, dressed in dark robes, staring down at her. Toriel was momentarily fazed to her spot at his intimidating height, when the skeleton suddenly said, “Pepperoni or ham and cheese?”

After a while, the two were now here, with Toriel sitting on his lap, eating hot pockets, passing more jokes, and laughing more than they had in a while, when Sans suddenly asked her if she could keep a promise.

“But can you keep it?” Sans asked again. He kept look into Toriel’s eyes, looking for one thing: reliance.

“Well….” Toriel said, deep in thought, “I’m really picky about my promises. Though any gentleman who likes knock-knock jokes has good chances. After all, that really makes you….a –door-able.”

Sans chuckled, causing Toriel to shake in her seat on his lap, and said, “Well, Tori, then I guess I can trust you with this promise….”

In Alterswap…

“Can you keep a promise?” King Sans asked. Toriel was sitting close to him on the bench that was placed within the walls of the castle. Toriel looked up at the Skeleton King’s eyes, her own shining brightly with glee, and said, “KEEPING A PROMISE? OFF COURSE, YOUR MAJESTY! I, THE TERRIFIC TORI, AM, AFTER ALL, THE GREATEST MASTER OF PROMISE KEEPING THERE IS IN THE UNDERGROUND! THAT….THAT IS OF COURSE….AS LONG AS…IT…DOESN’T ENDANGER PEOPLE. I WOULDN’T WANT TO BE RESPONSIBLE FOR EVIL STUFF…..”

King Sans gave a deep sigh.

It had just happened this morning that Toriel had gone training once again, leaving her brother at his sentry post (asleep. What a lazy goat!) when she reached Alphys. Alphys, however, had a message for her.

“Guess what, twerp?!” She yelled excitedly, “The king has requested your presence in his castle! Looks like somebody’s noticed your talent!”
Toriel was excited, but then got a little confused.


“To be honest, I really have no idea…” Alphys explained, while her tail smacked the ground, and then she buffed her speech, “BUT WHO CARES?! THE KING HIMSELF REQUESTS YOUR PRESENCE!! WHAT ARE YOU STANDING AROUND FOR?!”

Toriel was caught off guard by this burst, saluted her captain, and ran off, and then hid behind some bushes. She looked around. No one in sight.

Weeks ago, she had seen her brother ‘use one of his shortcuts’….and disappear. After he came home, she had immediately burst upon him and demanded an explanation as to how his shortcuts work. Totally busted, Asgore knew he had to explain what his shortcuts actually were; teleportation. Toriel had been amazed by learning this, and asked her brother if he could teach her how to ‘shortcut.’

Now, Toriel would finally see the effects of her shortcut training. She pictured the castle entrance, and with all her will, wanting herself to be there, she snapped her fingers.

And found herself there. She could teleport. Her excitement had never been higher. And now here she was, in the presence of His Majesty, King Sans, right next to him on a bench.

“Well….you see…this isn’t easy on me either….” King Sans said, “….but in these past few months, after I….met you at Snowdin…(Toriel remembered the day she met the tall skeleton wearing a cloak to conceal himself. She had immediately been interested in the stranger) and these meetings we’ve had ever since…I’m sorry if this is too much for you…” he said sadly, bowing his head.

“Well…in that case….listen carefully…”

In Alterfell

“Could you keep a promise?”

Toriel looked at the door. Did this guy actually just ask for a promise?
“A promise, eh? Yeah,” she said, “I can definitely keep my promises. I even  have kept this other one lately, see? I’ve had for a long time, and I still do today. And I hate myself for that.”

“Gee, that’s rough.” The voice behind the door said. (Unlike Altertale and Alterswap Toriels, Alterfell Toriel was unfortunate enough as to not have met the one behind the door yet…)

“Hmph. Keeping promises is probably the worst habit I have. Way worse than that ‘rabbit’ I still have to show to you.”

A chuckle came from behind the door. Toriel giggled. That was a good (bad) one.

“Sooo…yeah. Count yer sweet arse on me to keep yer promise, buddy. So spit it out. And this is the only time I’ll allow you, by the way, heh….”

There was a moment of silence, and then the voice said, “All right, listen…”

I’m all ears, dear…”

End of Chapter 1

Hope you like it! And be sure to read the original ‘An Ideal Brother.’

Went to the doctor. Got weighed. I’m 263– an extra 3 pounds than usual!


Seriously, I used to be upset when I gained but now I know my worth isn’t in my weight. It’s me and my awesomeness that defines me.

Still kind. Still cute. And still hella happy.

Be mighty my friends.

- Mod Dom


{ Spent the afternoon at another cosplay thing. We did a little impromptu photoshoot, but sometime early next year we’re hoping to do a full one because by then our other friends will have finished up Mabel, Wendy, Soos, Ford, and Gideon. Still hoping we can get other friends on board for Pacifica and McGucket, too.

Side note, that’s one of my two absolute best friends as Bill, and good lord, please look at that last photo of him and appreciate what a beautiful human being he is, thanks }

Do it do it do it

We Make the Kingdom - Pt.6

Image by silverdagger865

Pairing: Yongguk x OC
Genre: Fantasy, with Angst and Smut to come
Summary:  After a vampire attack leaves you almost dead, you are rescued by a group of werelions, powers long thought to be extinct. Upon discovering the same magic flows in your blood, you join their fight against encroaching vampires and another, very human monster, to save the kingdom.
Previous parts 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7 ,  8, 9(M), 1011, 12, 13

Despite your accelerated healing, your body continues to ache at the end of each day of the following weeks. Jongup is a patient but persistent instructor, working you through drill after drill and never losing his temper when you make a mistake. They occur less and less frequently as the memory of the movements become embedded in your muscles, muscles that continue to  grow stronger.

The extra hours you practice, recruiting the lions who stay behind with you nightly as partners, aid your advancing abilities as well. It is obvious they hold back when they let you attempt to fight them, but hopefully soon they will have to put in some effort to hold you off. You are determined to match Jongup’s efforts with your own.

Yongguk’s teachings arms you with a mental arsenal of information. He continues giving you material limited to your vampiric foes, letting you evaluate it by yourself before reporting your conclusions to him. He listens, offering corrections as needed and prodding you to defend your positions with questions. Your discussions become spirited and enjoyable and variedas Yongguk opens to you. Beneath his almost placid exterior thrives an active, incredibly intelligent mind.

This discovery leads you to be even more intrigued with the alpha. Not only does he posses book knowledge of science and art and literature, but the often more difficult subjects of human nature and philosophy as well. Talking with Yongguk rekindles a insatiable thirst for learning in your heart, one he readily helps you try to fill.

He seems to enjoy your mental sparring as much as you, but you can sense he still holds some part of himself aloof from you. As many smiles as you’re able to coax from his lips, Yongguk never smiles with you the way he does the other lions. Sometimes you envy them and the obvious affection he holds for them, the ease and intimacy of their all belonging to each other. They are a pride and you are still an outlier: accepted but not yet into the inner circle. Whenever the feeling creeps into your skin, you brush it aside and throw yourself into your studies with renewed vigor. You will earn your place among them. Something so precious is not easily given.

Unfortunately, despite how well you are progressing in your other areas of study, fully shifting into your were-form still eludes you. You practice in secret with Junhong and in the privacy of one of the upper rooms when he hunts, wanting to surprise the others.

It was only a number of days before you could find it the instant you concentrate. The heartbeat of the lioness nestles in your chest like the steady purr of a well fed cat beside a fire. Waking your power proves another matter entirely.

Keep reading

When we wake in the morning, we are met with the weight of errands and to-dos. This causes us to forget that from our lips falls poetry. We forget that our fingertips are paintbrushes. We forget that our hearts have the capacity to give love, and let love in. I spend my days trying to remember that, more than skin and bones, I’m worth more than my weight in gold, and so are you.

((OOC: I have had the MOST lovely day with my beautiful Cheesecake, being spoiled rotten, eating my weights worth in pancakes, and managing to spend all my money on a lot of coconut related things somehow. 

We spent so much time heart-eyes-ing each other that we took 0 selfies (????!!!) but I just managed to take this one picture of Jess and food…

(fight me TT).

Waking up this morning to the video from my loves was such a wonderful way to start the day. I am so, so grateful to have such loving, hilarious, sassy little shits in my life and I love you all so incredibly much.

Thank you so much TT for putting it together and editing what I suspect was a mid-length movie from Andy and KP XD

Thank you so much my darlings! Ima go eat some more <3 <3 <3

……I will have my revenge for the song…)