worst superheroes

It’s a shame that X-Men Origins: Wolverine is one of the worst superhero films ever made, because it also contains one of the best superhero films never made: right there during the opening credits. 

 In the first couple minutes of Origins, we’re treated to a montage of Wolverine and Sabretooth fighting alongside one another through a series of battles plucked straight out of your 10th grade history class. They survive an infantry charge during the American Civil War, a nighttime raid on German trenches during WWI, Omaha Beach during the D-Day invasion, and even their own execution during the Vietnam War.

Screw a two-hour movie – that’s an amazing TV series. Wolverine and Sabretooth, surly, stubbled, almost literally grizzly immortal soldiers bantering their way through every war in history – and also claw-mauling Nazis. Plus, for long-term drama: Comic book readers know these literal brothers in arms eventually become bitter enemies – imagine experiencing that heartbreak firsthand, after binge-watching several seasons of manly super-bonding. Instead, we got the worst possible version of Deadpool: One literally without a mouth. Whose brilliant idea was that? And how fucking fired are they? We hope it’s “a lot.”

6 Really Awesome Movies Hidden Inside Really Crappy Movies

10

❝ This is why you should never, ever get your hopes up. This is why you should see the glass as half empty. So when the whole thing spills, you aren’t as devastated. ❞

there is, honestly, so much going on in these two panels

  • the guy whose superpower is “he can eat anything” is from the planet bismoll as in “pepto-bismol,” a truly terrible pun
  • “crashing comets!” is a good expletive
  • “i’ll be back in a jif with something terrif” is, however, the worst thing anyone in this comic has ever said
  • element lad sadly remembering his tragic backstory
  • the fact that you sculpted a life-size clay portrait bust of your mother wasn’t a good enough mother’s day gift already, but gee, if you turn it to solid gold, then we’re talking

If I could have any superpower in the world it would be to understand and speak any language ever.

Exciting right? 

Ok so maybe it’s not that exciting…but still!

I mean imagine the possibilities! 

  • I could eavesdrop on people who are speaking about me in a language I don’t understand. And then freak them out when I reply to their comments. 
  • I could watch anime without needing subs (not a fan of dubs so lets not even go there).
  • Could read fanfictions from across the world no matter the language they are written in. 
  • I could even understand manga without needing a translation, so no longer need to wait even longer to read my favorites!
  • Could speak to other fans in my fandoms without needing to worry about stupid language barriers.
  • I could translate amazing fics so that other people can enjoy them, I mean fics like Dirty Laundry in the Voltron fandom are basically must read for any of their fans right?

I would become the protector of the universe…well, of the fandom universe anyways… well, kinda…

Power Rangers 2017 review

The past few years have sucked for reboots. There was Fantastic Four, the absolute worst iteration of the superheroes ever and a nadir for the superhero film genre; there was Ghostbusters, the excessively mediocre, casually sexist, and painfully unfunny all-female shitfest no one wanted; there are all the live-action adaptations of cartoons like The Smurfs, which lack all the soul of the original show; and don’t even get me started on horror reboots. Hell, the years to come don’t look much better, what with the cringe-inducingly bad Universal Horrorverse. So when I saw they were doing a reboot of Power Rangers, a series I’ve never been a fan of but know a little about, and it looked like it was going to be yet another tone-deaf, overly gritty, miserable reboot, I was not impressed and predicted that, like so many reboots before it, it was going to suck. HARD.

I was wrong.

Power Rangers is the reboot I’ve been waiting for, a movie that fills me with a sense of fun, excitement, and even interest. This actually made me want to go and watch Power Rangers, something absolutely nothing before this film has ever made me want to do. Like yes, it’s not a perfect film, but for what it is, it does a lot right in my eyes. Hell, it actually does shit a lot better than its contemporaries; it handles elements reboots like Ghostbusters and superhero films like Suicide Squad and Fant4stic handled really poorly. I’ll explain what I mean in just a moment, but first, the story:

Jason the high school football star lands himself in detention after running afoul of the law; there, he meets an autistic boy named Billy as well as a pretty young lady named Kimberly. A series of eevnts leads them to a nearby mine, where they’re joined by Zack and Trini. They discover some funky coins and soon discover they have superpowers. Returning to the mine they discover an ancient alien spaceship, where the little robot Alpha 5 and the cybernetic talking head Zordon fill them in on their destiny: they are the Power Rangers, guardians of the universe, and they must stop the evil Rita Repulsa from destroying the Earth. Rita is searching for a crystal that will give her a shitton of power, and is out trying to reform her mighty ally Goldar; can the Rangers learn to work as a team via the power of friendship in time, or will Rita make her monster grow powerful enough to wipe them out?

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

"just stay with me" Fox!alya/nino

“Just stay with me,” Nino whispered, brushing Vixen’s bangs from her eyes. They were crouched in the alley Vixen had ran them to after saving him from becoming a big pile of Nino-like goo. She could hear the rest of the team still fighting the akuma the next block over.

BEEP.

“I can’t,” she sighed, one hand grasping at her necklace. “I’m going to turn back soon and the others need me.”

“Would that be the worst thing, me knowing who you really are?”

Vixen looked at the boy she had fallen in love with, the boy whose life she had just saved and would save over and over again if need be. She looked at the boy she wanted to share her secret with more than anybody else in the world and she lied, “Yes, it would be the worst thing.”

The fox superhero stood up and held out a hand to Nino but he didn’t take it. “You don’t trust me,” he said quietly.

“It doesn’t have anything to do with trust. I want you to be safe.”

BEEP.

“Go. I’ll be fine. Save the world.”

Vixen spared one last glance at Nino and then ran out of the alley, flute raised high.

“Tough break, doll,” Dusuu sighed, floating out of Nino’s messenger bag.

“Yeah, what else is new,” he mumbled. “Dusuu, feathers out.”


“It’s about time, Paon. You’ve almost missed all the fun,” Vixen winked. 

“Yeah, Foxy’s already had to transform again since she saved her boyfriend,” Chat Noir laughed, dodging a glob of bright red goo.

“Watch it, Chat,” Ladybug warned. “I don’t have time to kiss any boo-boos tonight.”

“Ugh, get a room already,” Queen Bee complained.

Paon pulled out his steel fan. “Let’s go to work.”

Originally posted by miraculousladybuggifs

There you go, anon! Hope you enjoyed it. I usually like doing turtle!nino but lately peacock!nino has really been doing it for me so I thought it would be a fun twist for the story.

If you would like me to write a short ML drabble, send me a prompt from this list and a pairing and I will get to it when I can. :)

A Chloebug/Chat Nath AU
  • Master Fu: Hawkmoth, I could take you down with the worst possible team of superheroes I could find!
  • Hawkmoth: Ha! I'd bet my entire fortune on that.
  • Fu:
  • Fu: Can I get that in writing?
  • Later:
  • Fu: *observes Marinette and Adrien having their umbrella moment* Nah, too obvious.
  • Fu: *sees Chloe shove Nathanael into a puddle* That'll work.