CONTEXT: Party of five has entered a magical “simulation” of sorts. My character, a bestial monk (a custom merfolk race that’s much more fish/sharklike than normal) had managed to scare off a small army of orcs single-handed through the help of a crit. The monk never gave their name, so for the time being, they were called “Fish.”
DM (IC as the simulation console): The remaining orcs shriek and suddenly vanish as the world shakes. “Error. Database overhaul. Spiking…” Suddenly a massive orc, fifty foot tall appears, covered in smoke and wisps of flames as it holds a massive war axe, a single red eye burning bright.
The rest of the party proceeds to take their turns, attacking the giant orc for varying amount of damage.
ME (IC, after rolling yet another 20 on a climb check): Fish slithered up behind the avatar, snarling like a crazed animal as it made a wild attempt to scale up its leg and sank its teeth into it for extremely minor damage. …That CAN’T taste good.
PALADIN (OOC): Is… Is.. Is it bad that I’m like fucking dying laughing over that?
ME (OOC): No. It’s honestly insanely silly.
PALADIN (OOC): “You bite into the aspect. It tastes like blood and ballsweat.”
The party all starts uncontrollably laughing.
DM (IC): It does not. It tastes like cinders, rotten flesh and blood.
PALADIN (OOC): … And ballsweat