workout photos

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No gym for me today; went to my friend’s wedding shower!

What kickstarted my weight loss/fitness journey a few years back was a really terrible candid photo that I saw of myself. I was so shocked at how I looked to other people and it seriously upset me for weeks until I decided to do something about it. We were all gathering today for a group photo and someone snapped this picture and it truly made me realize how far I have come and how happy I am with my body and myself in general. It has been such a long road to get here but I wouldn’t have it any other way.

A little blonder and a few more tattoos, but I can’t even recognize the girl on the left.

“YOU CANNOT SOLVE A PROBLEM ON THE LEVEL IT WAS CREATED. YOU MUST RISE”

#LEVELUP

So here they are. I legitimately don’t have a pair of shorts that fit me right now, I’ve rolled down my trousers to give a better idea of what I’m fighting here. This is the heaviest I’ve ever been. This is also the sickest I’ve ever been. Every single day I struggle. And for the first time in a long time I hate what I see when I look at myself. I am angry, so angry that I let myself get back to this place. But I am also hopeful that I can do this. I did it before, I can do it again.

I weighed in at 110.4kg this morning 6/6/17, a terrifying number. I need to lose almost half my body weight, I need to lose a good 45kg for my height. I’m not going to lie and say I’m not doing this partially to look better, because I am, but the biggest reason is my health because I am suffering. I’m going to do insanity again before I move as I can get the programme done, and then I’ll restart crush at home once I move home and get settled.

I’m off to do my first workout now. It’s not going to be pretty or easy. But at least I’m doing it. Wish me luck guys, this isn’t gonna be easy.

Woke up this morning, threw on my favorite workout clothes, and headed to yoga where I took some much-needed relaxation time. I decided to continue my practice when I got home. It was a tough week for me. From car troubles, difficulties at work and school, to feeling completely inadequate and unsatisfied with my personal relationships; I was in desperate need of some self-care. 

When I was younger, I always frowned upon the thought of doing yoga. I used to claim, “It’s too easy.” As a competitive runner and soccer player, I was used to the constant adrenaline. I never let myself slow down. As I’ve grown up, I’ve realized that I need to take more time for myself. Slowing down is still extremely challenging for me, but I’ve gotten so much better at listening to my body. I’m so thankful for yoga, and for a passion that makes me feel genuinely good about myself no matter what life throws at me. 

Here’s to hoping everyone has a relaxing weekend. 💕🙏🏻