words left for this

Imagine Chris being there for you through it all.

A/N: This is a request from @brobrobreja, I don’t know if this helps. I mean- I cried writing this so I’m sorry if this makes you sadder, I just- it’s a really tough situation. Sending so much love your way. X

You swore time stood still when the words “acute myeloid leukemia” left your oncologist’s lips. Your mouth became dry and your heart started to beat in your ears; voices and background noises merged into a deafening buzz that somehow repeated one sentence, “you have cancer.” You couldn’t believe it- you didn’t want to believe it. You didn’t understand how what you’d thought was a really bad cold could turn out to be blood cancer. You thought because you were sick that it was normal: to feel tired, to have a fever, to get night sweats, to have reoccurring nose bleeds, to throw up, to lose weight, to have your bones and joints ache despite your use of pain killers. You didn’t think anything of it because you didn’t want to think anything of it; you knew something was wrong but you were too afraid to admit it, and as it turned out- you had every right to be afraid.

Your husband, Chris, was the reason you finally decide to go to the hospital. You were getting weaker with each passing day, and your pain was only just beginning. Today you couldn’t even get out of bed, which was the last straw for Chris; he forced you into his car and drove you to the hospital. The two of you met with a GP who took one look at you and your list of symptoms and sent you to their resident oncologist on the fifth floor. You sat in the waiting room with Chris, who held your freezing hand the entire time. He tried to reassure you, repeating the sentences that would usually rid you of your angst: “It’s going to be okay, sweetheart.”, “We’re just overthinking again.”, “I’m sure it’s nothing.” Usually they worked, but not this time. You knew it wasn’t going to be okay; you weren’t overthinking again; and it was definitely something. You could feel it everywhere: your gut, your heart, your mind, and your soul; it wasn’t just the numbing pain talking, it was every inch of your being.

“Hey,” Chris gently squeezed your hand, bringing you back into the room. You managed a small smile as you ignored the tears blurring your vision; it wasn’t you you were worried about, it was your husband. Death was going to be easy, but surviving a death wasn’t. “Did you hear what Dr. Michaels said?” He tried to keep his voice as calm as possible. “There are a lot of treatments you can undergo, okay? We’ve got um-” he glanced at Dr. Michaels who looked heartbroken for the both of you, “chemotherapy and biological therapy and target therapy and radiation-” He stopped himself when he heard his voice break. “There’s a chance for recovery, Y/N.”

“I know,” you nodded, squeezing his hand as tightly as your weak body could. “Don’t you worry, I’m going to do whatever it takes to fight this.” Chris broke down when you said that, burying his head in your lap. He wanted to be strong for you, but he couldn’t right now. You were so young and you had so much left to do with your life; he couldn’t lose you, you couldn’t leave him. “It’s okay, baby.” You kissed the top of his head, whispering into his hair. “I’m going to be okay, I promise.”

After that day, Chris never cried in front of you again. He promised himself he’d keep it together because you didn’t need to take care of him, he needed to take care of you. He stayed incredibly positive, reminding you every day that recovery was possible and it was- especially since they detected your cancer in its early stages. Acute leukemia was the kind of cancer that needed to be treated as soon as it was diagnosed, as were most cancers. The goal of treatment was inducing a remission which was an absence of leukemia cells in the body, that came with a lot of chemotherapy; pills, catheter- whatever form of inserting the drugs into you, you did. It exhausted you physically, mentally, and psychologically. You spent most of your time at either the hospital or the dialysis clinic with Chris, of course, who put his entire career on hold.

You didn’t want him to; you wanted him to go to Atlanta and film ‘Infinity War’; you wanted him to live his life like his wife’s wasn’t on the line. But of course, he wouldn’t because he couldn’t. As much as he wanted to keep you happy, he couldn’t agree to such a ridiculous request. Even if he were to agree, just to appease you, Marvel wouldn’t have allowed him on set. You’d been married to Chris for five years now, everyone he knew and everyone he’d worked with knew you too. They also knew you needed Chris in such a trying time, whether or not you were willing to admit it- you needed the love of your life by your side. So Kevin promised Chris they could postpone the filming schedule for as long as he needed, or at least until things weren’t so raw and fresh. You’d tried to argue against it, stating there was no point in him suffering with you, but he wouldn’t have any of it. He even reminded you of your wedding vows- for better or for worst, and in sickness and in health- which shut you up.

“Do you want some te-” Chris cut himself off when he saw you asleep on the couch with Dodger watching over you. He sighed as he ran a hand through his hair, walking over to carefully readjust you and your blanket. “I’m not hurting her, bud.” He reassured Dodger, who growled slightly. “I’m just…” He trailed off, sighing again at the sight of your weary face. “What are we going to do, Dodger?” He looked over at his pup, chuckling with limited humor as he wept. He tried to stop himself from completely breaking down, but he couldn’t. “I feel so fucking useless. Tea?” He almost laughed at how ridiculous he sounded. “I’m offering her fucking tea when she’s-” he buried his face in his hands. “Oh God, why did it have to be her?” He cried into his hands. “She doesn’t deserve this, no one does.”

Chris cried for a little while then wiped his face with his t-shirt before leaving you to rest. He headed for his laptop where had several articles about leukemia and treatment plans and statistics of recovery. Things may have looked bleak, but it didn’t stop him from giving up hope. If there was a chance, there was a way. If you were willing to fight, so was he. You were stronger than anyone he’d ever known, and if anyone were to beat any shitty illness- it was you. You could do it, he could feel it as sure as you could feel the pain in your bones. Your treatment was going to induce remission, and you were going to recover, and the two of you were going to start a family and live happily ever after. Chris could picture the whole thing, he could see his future with you and there wasn’t a black cloud in sight. As long as the two of you stuck together, fought together, and stay positive together- things were going to be okay.

“Chris,” Chris heard your weak voice call for him and he poked his head around the corner. You were sitting up with a hand over your mouth, which meant only one thing. He quickly rushed over with a box of tissues and a bin so you could throw up. He held your hair back for you and gently rubbed your back as you threw up water and bile because you were too weak to eat any proper foods. You started crying as he cleaned your mouth for you, pushing his hand away and burying your head in yours. “I’m sorry,” you sobbed.

“Don’t apologize,” he shook his head, putting the bin aside so he could hold you. You melted into his arms and for a second, you almost forgot about everything. “Baby, this is not your fault. You’re doing everything you can, okay? You have nothing to be sorry for, do you understand me?” You managed a nod as you continued to cry. “I know how difficult it is right now, but you are going to get better. You just to believe because the mind is so much stronger than the body, and you have one of the strongest minds I’ve ever come across.”

“What if it’s not enough?”

“It is,” he assured you. “Believe me, it is. We’re going to spend the rest of our lives together,” he cupped your face in his hands and brushed away your tears, smiling. “I’m not letting you go anywhere, you hear? You’re stuck with me, Y/N, whether you like it or not.” You managed to laugh despite how utterly lost and broken you felt. “You’re going to get better,” he repeated. “Things are going to look up, I promise. You just need to keep fighting, baby. Can you do that?”

You nodded, managing a light chuckle. “I can do this all day,” you quoted Captain America’s most popular line and drew a genuine, heartfelt laugh from Chris. He brushed away the remainder of your tears then kissed your lips. Yes, things were bad right now, but he’d no doubt it was going to get better real soon. With a character as tough as yours, not even leukemia could keep you down.

Tags: @chrisevans-imagines @widowsfics @m-a-t-91 @xoxomioxoxo @imaginesofdreams @ateliefloresdaprimavera @katiew1973 @winter-tospring @shamvictoria11 @caitsymichelle13 @michellekeehlmello @letterstomyself21 @soymikael @faye22 @always-an-evans-addict @sammyrenae68 @brobrobreja @elizabeth-matsuoka @thegirlwiththeimpala @camerica96 @all-of-the-above11 @whenyourealizethisisntagoodname @yourtropegirl @smoothdogsgirl @createdbytinyaddiction @siofrataylor @dreamingintheimpalawithdean @imaginary-world-of-mine @wanderingkat77 @grantward3 @rileyloves5 @chrsmom302 @buckys-shield @mylittlefandomfanfictions @breezykpop @catch-me-im-a-falling-star @tabi-toast @ssweet-empowerment @hayleesteashoppe @chrixa @feelmyroarrrr @akidura79 @louisespecter @castellandiangelo @ccrossfire @assxmblesstuff @edward-lover18 @princessesnaddy @1d-niallerbieberforever @dxbrevgrey @bellastellaluna @christopher-or-steven @brokenwingsxix @yourenotrogers @im-a-fandom-slut @royalexperiment256 @palaiasaurus64 @mysteriouslyme81 @captainumeboshi @avengingalec @tacohead13 @badassbaker @pegasusdragontiger (Inbox me if you’d like to be added to the tag list)


Max Landis’ instagram story had a quick sneak at a paper on the desk at Dirk Gently meeting. Bottom left symbol is Icarus, Dirk. Bottom right is Moloch, which I think we got some tweet about that a while ago. Top right is Bel, which Google says is Mesopotamian word for Master? And the top left I can’t identify. Could there be a new Blackwing experiment?

imaccualtrash  asked:

love me

The words left the others lips faster then he wanted them to. “I wanna be yours” was said in a harsh whisper, barely audible over the blaring music in the back ground. “Love me…” another whisper left his mouth as lips smashed together with the others. Otabek Altin was taken by surprise in this moment. Was this a dream or was this reality? He wasn’t sure. He dreamed of the day similar words would leave Yuri’s lips and dance into his ears. And yet it was really happening. In small hallway that lead to the clubs bathrooms. He was currently DJing a private show for some rich wife-to-be that followed Otabek’s career harder than one of Yuri’s angels. 

Yuri noticed the way the girls would cling to him in between sets handing him free drinks he would politely decline. If it wasn’t for the brides offer to bring a friend with him, Yuri wouldn’t even be there. But he tagged along because who the hell could say no to Otabek?

The jealousy that Yuri felt was like a fire that clung to his lungs with each breath, making it painful to even move. It was in that moment that he realized his love for the Kazakh boy who is a famous DJ, was deeper then he ever thought. 

Which lead him to where he was now. After a short…some what if an argument of “Why are you letting them hang all over you like that?” and Otabek locking eyes with him, a fire behind them he’d never seen before. A reply he never thought he would ever hear left his lips. “ Why aren’t you hanging over me like that?” His words dipped in lust and sin. The air between them grew heated and needy quickly.

It was unspoken that they both wanted to kiss each other and they both could see just how much they needed each other. So in a moment of fuck it all. They kissed. 

“I wanna be yours”
“Love me…”

The kisses grew deeper then. Every inch of the boys skin was flushed and hot. Bodies pressed against each other. Otabek’s hands grabbing Yuri’s ass, pushing him up against the wall as Yuri’s pale legs wrapped tight around his waist. 

Yuri’s fingers finding a way to get tangled into the slicked black locks. Pulling his face even closer. 

Yuri’s lips pulling back as a loud moan ripped out of his throat when Otabek thrusted his hips against the his. 

Yuri attached his lips to Otabeks neck, biting hard and sucking away the pain he may have caused. Otabek growling in response as his head dipped to the side.

Yuri pulled away and slowly brought his lips closer to Otabeks, stopping before they touched again. Their breaths twisting together. Then Yuri smirked, wide and prideful. “Your break is over” He whispered in his ear before he hopped down and started walking back towards that party. 

Otabek leaned against the wall, trying to catch his breath.

He was a fool in love with a Tiger. 

And man was he glad that the Tiger was his. 

Your Choice - Part 2

(Part 1)


Mac x Reader

Summary: Hi! Could you do a MacGyver x Reader where he and the reader are sort of an established thing but then Nikki comes back and there is a lot of tension? You can go anywhere you’re like from there.

You still weren’t sure if you believed it, the whole Nikki being a double or undercover agent thing. Even after she had explained why she did what she did. But in the end it didn’t matter what you believed, heck you’d just be glad to never see her face again. According to Jack’s big mouth she had left. No word yet on how Mac was feeling about it.

Finishing up in one of the Phoenix’s conference rooms, you stacked together the papers in a neat pile on the left side of the table. Mac’s figure entered the room just as you titled your head up.

“Need any help?”. He asked. It surprised you because those were the most words he had uttered to you since that conversation in your apartment.

Locking your phone after reading the message that popped up, you gathered the papers putting them in your oversized work bag. “No, I got it”.

“I’m guessing Jack told you that Nikki is no longer here?”. He shifted foot to foot, not liking the extra tension that just appeared out of thin air after saying Nikki’s name.

“Yeah, he did. So when can I expect her to come by? In a few days or how about few months?. I wanna be prepared in case something like this happens again”. The bitterness spilling out all too well.

Mac stayed silent. Taking another look his way, there was no question he was tired. His eyes hardly had any light to them and Bozer had accidentally mentioned that Mac was over-working himself more than usual. And judging from the way Mac was staring at you, he was drawing the same conclusion.

“What do you want, Mac?”. The tiredness kicking in from being copped up in an building all day.

“I want you, Y/N. I want what we had before I let Nikki get into my head again, before I made a stupid mistake in kissing her”. He blocked the doors entrance, his strong build no match for you. “You told me that you still wanted to be with me, it’s been 2 weeks and I need to know if you’ve forgiving me?”.

Putting the bag at the crock of your arm, you replied. “Why? So you can run to Nikki and kiss her again if my answer is no?”

He turned slightly and shut the door. “God, no Y/N!. Tell me what I need to do here? I won’t see Nikki ever again or speak to her if that’s what you want. Just please, tell me how I can get you to forgive me?”.

The truth is you’d already forgiving Mac. The sleepless nights, seeing him in the hallway not being able to run up to him, not knowing how his day went and so on, all made the choice to forgive him just a tiny bit easier. The biggest reason was the most obvious one, that you loved him more than anything. Not telling him, wasn’t to punish him in any way. It was solely for you to see if you could live without Mac, and well the answer was you couldn’t.

“I’m so sorry”. He spoke once again, this time inching a little closer. “I swore to myself that I’d never hurt you like that and I did it anyway because I’m the biggest idiot. And if I have to spend the rest of my life making it up to you, then that’s exactly what I’ll do”.

A smile started to form on your lips, “How about we just start with dinner, say my place in about an hour?”.

Mac pulled you in a quick, unexpected hug and the smell of his aftershave and the warmth of his body just felt right. “I’ll be there, I promise”. He hurried out the door, waving goodbye as he ran past the glass windows.

“I think you just made his day”. Jack stood out in the hallway, joining him the two of you walked side by side.

“I could tell you didn’t approve of me freezing Mac out for 2 weeks”. Side-eyeing Jack to get his reaction.

He causally bumped shoulders with you. “Doesn’t matter what I thought or Bozer or even Riley, the only thing that mattered was how you felt. Y/N, you had every right to be mad at Mac, I’m just glad to see the two of you are working things out”.

Stopping at the door situated at the end of the hallway, you breathed. “Well I better go, I have a dinner to get ready for. Thanks Jack for the talk”.

“Anytime Y/N”. Saying goodbye in the form of a hug, you made your out of the building feeling oddly nervous for this dinner.

Your phone vibrated in your hand, it was a message from Mac. 3 words that’s all it contained. But yet those 3 words meant more now than you every thought possible.

I love you - Mac

Typing your response back. It was going to take baby steps, trust was important to you and that was never an easy thing to get back. But you wholeheartedly believed that you and Mac could overcome this hurdle and re-appear stronger than ever on the other side.

Merlin.” The word left Harry in a slow exhale. He hadn’t realized until that moment that he had been holding his breath.

Draco’s face softened. “In many ways, dancing with a partner is not unlike the tête-à-tête that occurs in a duel.” He elaborated upon seeing Harry’s sceptical look. “It lies in the strength and flow of your movements. You need to be attuned to your body’s rhythms, as well as those of your partner’s and the surrounding space.”

“Duelling and dancing,” Harry said slowly, pausing to give the comparison some thought. His eyes snapped up, sparkling with humour. “I’ll have to work on it. Because as it currently stands, the only thing they have in common is the tendency for my partners run the other way.
—  Fallaway by anonymous (part of the @dracotops-harry fest, posting now! Will update author info after reveals!) 

“Aww, you came to apologize?” Y/n teased.

Dean gave Y/n a look, “forget I ever dropped by”

“Wait Dean, I’m sorry, I’m stop” Y/n called out to Dean before he could leave. “what did you come here for?”

He sighed “About the fight we had earlier”

“Go on,”

Dean looked away from Y/n “I came to apologize for storming out like that”

“That wasn’t hard now. Was it?”

Dean didn’t need to look at her to know she was smiling ear to ear, he could have just guessed that from her teasing tone of voice alone.

“I’m leaving” He left y/n won’t saying another word. Hearing her laughing behind him.

Draco Sodding Malfoy - Shewhxmustnxtbenamed - Drarry - Fandom [Archive of Our Own]
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
By Organization for Transformative Works

Chapters: 73/73
Fandom: Drarry - Fandom
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Relationships: Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter
Characters: Draco Malfoy, Harry Potter, Original Male Character(s)

Harry finds Draco outside a pub and takes him back to his place, only to find out that Draco is in an abusive relationship. Harry invites Draco to stay until he can get back on his feet. They go to Draco’s ex-boyfriends house, and come back with more than they bargained for.

Bookmarker’s Notes:

This story… it’s unbelievabley beautiful. It seemed that with every word I read I seemed to be loosing my own vocabulary. I don’t have any words left to describe it properly other than to say that I didn’t want this story to end . But just when it DID end, I realized that it was only the beginning…

anonymous asked:

that's why we, onho shippers who are left, appreciate you all the more for providing us postings and fics :')


sjakjskajslakslakslak… thank you so much anon… hehe

We are so few, right?! That’s why I try my best to keep writing, even that some times I just want to give up.

Luckily Minho and Jinki are always providing cute and perfect moments for us, being cute on stage, always touching like they could not keep their hands for themselves.

Looking at each other like they know what they’re thinking, and living together like a married couple. Not only in Korea but also in Japan. Jinki himself said that.

Going out on dates whenever they can, even that they see each other every single day. Whenever they travel, they go somewhere and they are always going out in Japan too.

Really, people don’t ship them because they try to ignore what is right in front of them… XD

They are just perfect.
Natural Bonds

Originally posted by kimthwriter

Pairing: Taehyung x Reader
Genre: Fluff, smut
Summary&A/N: You set out to share a place close to your heart with Taehyung. Together, you make it even more special. Dedicated to any other country girls who sometimes feel a little left out in the fandom.
Word Count: 4.3K

Home can be different for everyone. For some, it’s a physical place. For others, it’s a person. You are one of the lucky ones who have both. That both fit so flawlessly together is a gift unlike any other.

From the first time you’d brought Taehyung back to your childhood home, he fit like he belonged here as much as you. He charmed your family flawlessly just as they did him. Mutual politeness rapidly gave way to the same teasing warmth you grew up with. It matched him perfectly. Now they always ask when you’ll be bringing him back.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

I'm poking my head in because I heard you like Hashe and can I just scream about it for a second? Pining Horaven. He tries to act all cool and majestic and mysterious, but internally he's screaming because *red alert* Fluffy Dandilion Girl™ is at his Ban Camp home and he can't handle the adventure sparkle in her glowy eyes. He resorts to one word sentences and Aesling is just left like ??? I love it!


I have this head canon that considering how dense Horaven can be, I feel like it’d take a while for him to even realize that he likes Ashe. Like, “What’s this? My heart starts to flutter when she’s around. What does that mean??” ESPECIALLY IF HE’S NEVER LIKED ANYONE BEFORE SO—

But yes, a flustered Horaven is a good uwu

geoclaire  asked:

*sidles over* Kate and Etta, 12 for the prompt meme

(For this meme - and please do send more, I love these prompts!)

12) things you said when you thought I was asleep


In the haze of half-sleep, the letters sound disconnected from their meaning, a code half-cracked. How Kate herself sounds half the time, like a classified document. Redacted. Redacted. Redacted.

Etta sighs and shifts on the bench, but waking up enough to answer feels like too much to ask of herself. She burrows her head into her jacket and slips deeper. Kate’s soft laugh sounds underwater.

Her next words are no different. Sentences torn from their contexts, left to burn after reading.

“What you asked before…” Kate says. A long, slow breath punches out of her. “All the time. Yes.”

Etta is just awake enough just long enough to wonder what she’d asked, when she’d asked. And by the time she wakes the next morning, she’s forgotten Kate’s answer altogether.

People don’t miss the drugs. You won’t hear someone say, “Man, I really miss heroine.”

You hear people talk about how it made them feel, and that’s what they miss.

it’s the same way with people I think. You don’t always miss the person, you just miss the way they made you feel.

—  h
you looked over across the room at her. and there she was. her head tossed back, long hair flipped over one shoulder to frame the right side of her face. she is laughing, showing off all of her teeth, her nose scrunched up in the way you used to love. her eyes meet yours for a split second, and then it hits you. it’s her, it’s been her the day she walked into your English class two years ago. but then she’s looking away, the same smile still on her face, and you know that she’s never going to be yours again.
—  wish we could turn back time