words can not explain how happy I am

i love you. god i love you. you are literally this person i never imagined that i would get to meet. you are so wonderful i can’t even express it in words and sometimes that’s a bit frustrating but i think it’s pretty rad that you go far beyond words. you can’t be explained in just a few sentences and metaphors strung together. but you are this lovely human that i get to know and i am so grateful for that. you are so effortlessly kind and compassionate and strong willed. oh god. how could anyone not fall in love with you the moment they meet you? i have no idea how anyone could feel anything but pure happiness around you. you know how people have that one person they want to call whenever they get news? or when they’re having a bad day and there’s that one person who makes it feel so much more weightless? or that person that you can’t even believe you came across in this lifetime but you’re so incredibly happy that you did? that’s you. you’re that person for me. you make me smile until my cheeks hurt. you make my heart beat so fast. you give me so many butterflies, i feel like a little kid with this big silly crush on a boy. i love you so much my heart cannot even contain it. just being around you is the greatest thing. whether we sit there and talk about whatever is on our hearts, whether we sit in complete silence, whether we just listen to the music playing - everything is so much more beautiful when i’m with you. i want to see the world with your hand in mine. i want to go to art museums in different cities. i want to go to concerts. i want to go on road trips with no destination. i want to stay up to watch the sunset, and then stay up even later to catch the sunrise. but i also want to lay in bed all day with you. i want to watch your favourite movies. i want to lay there on your chest and just listen to you sing. i have never had someone in my life who i wanted to really explore or do life with until i met you. this feels like what a first love is supposed to feel like. new and exciting, not toxicity and lies. there is so much love i don’t even know what to do with all of it. i know things aren’t always easy. i know sometimes things hurt. i know it can be scary. but it’s beautiful. it’s always beautiful. i know you’ve been hurt. so have i. you deserve the entire world and i want to give you that. i need you to know that i love you with everything i am and everything i have. i need you to know that i’m not going anywhere. you’re stuck with me. i will be here for you on good days when everything feels light and i will be here for you on bad days when everything feels dark and heavy. i’ll be here supporting you. cheering you on. through everything. i’m your number one fan and i always will be. you’re the strongest and most intelligent person i know and i’m so excited to be able to be by your side while you take on your dreams. and no matter what happens, i’ll always cheer for you. i will always love you. if the future doesn’t have us together, just know that i will look back and just smile. because you’re this special person that exists at the same time as me and i somehow got lucky to be yours. so if things don’t work out, just know that somewhere out there, there’s an alternative universe where we ended up together and that’s enough for me. and i love you. i love you i love you i love you. that will never change.
—  i’m in love with you and i don’t want to be anything else
How can I explain to you, my happiness, my golden, wonderful happiness, how much I am all yours – with all my memories, poems, outbursts, inner whirlwinds? Or explain that I cannot write a word without hearing how you will pronounce it – and can’t recall a single trifle I’ve lived through without regret – so sharp! – that we haven’t lived through it together – whether it’s the most, the most personal, intransmissible – or only some sunset or other at the bend of a road – you see what I mean, my happiness?
And I know: I can’t tell you anything in words – and when I do on the phone then it comes out completely wrong. Because with you one needs to talk wonderfully, the way we talk with people long gone, do you know what I mean, in terms of purity and lightness and spiritual precision – but I – je patauge terribly. Yet you can be bruised by an ugly diminutive – because you are so absolutely resonant – like seawater, my lovely.
—  Vladimir Nabokov, from Letters to Vera (Penguin Classics, 2014)
4

AROHA SELCA DAY 02.23.17

 HAPPY ASTRO DAY! Wow a year since they debuted and have grown so far in a span of a year, I know I made a post to celebrate but I will do it again because it’s the 23rd in Canada. Words can not fully explain how I am truly feeling, from when I discovered them in April 2015 when they were known as iTeen to becoming ASTRO and waiting anxiously for the day they debuted so I can see what they will accomplished. 

 And now I have seen alot which I’m proud of, Debuting with Hide and Seek➡Breathless➡Confession➡winning a rookie award + the popularity award at the SMA➡ Going on tour➡ Winter Dreams and many more accomplishment to be listed. I have gained alot of friends and a new family ( @parkminhyvks @tinytaeil @pastelsuga @jisoox @taelightsavings @dontstealjiminsjams @sprjngup @astro-tastic @sanhatation @jinjins-freckles @moonhyeoku @astrosangel @moonbinmeow @vickylin204 @adorejinhao etc..) we can all express our love and appreciation to ASTRO which I’m forever thankful for, ASTRO has become part of my daily life and they have become my source of happiness. In their recent live to celebrate our one year anniversary of not only ASTRO debuting but getting our fanclub name which is AROHA, on this day its also known as the birth of AROHA. 

You and Me (Thanks Aroha) will forever be my favourite song as you may all know that it is dedicated to us. ASTRO thank you for everything, for being yourselfs, for working hard, for staying healthy and I’m going to continuously hoping and wishing you to be well rested, healthy and happiness. MJ, JinJin, Cha Eunwoo, MoonBin, Rocky, Yoon Sanha.. my stars, my angels thank you for all you have done for us AROHA’s, we are forever proud of being your babies as we have seen the birth of ASTRO. ASTRO wouldn’t be ASTRO if it werent for AROHA and AROHA wouldn’t be AROHA if it werent for ASTRO because we are one BIG family❤

Originally posted by moonha

Originally posted by moonha

Originally posted by sanhachan

(My heart cant take this because as I’m writing this i’m going to cry ;-;) One year with ASTRO has been completed now into many more  ❤

ASTRO + AROHA = FOREVER  ❤

My friend Amanda who I worked very closely on this record with, she sent me this song by this amazing songwriter MoZella and said, “I want you to listen to this song; it’s one of her personal songs. I don’t know if I can get it for you, but take a listen.” And the minute I heard this song, it was like when it first hit me when Sia played me Cannonball. Sometimes I don’t have the words to explain how grateful I am to be where I am, or how thankful I am to have gotten through what I went through, and to be okay. But not even okay - to be better, to be happy, to be whole. It’s hard to put that into words sometimes. Even just saying that out loud, I was like, ‘OMG, why am I saying this. I sound ridiculous.’ When you hear a song like this and you just go, “OMG, thank you. I could just sit back and play you this song.” It’s a song of appreciation of being where you are, and thankful to the people - so many of whom are here tonight - who helped me to get to this place right now. […] If you guys don’t know MoZella, she’s an incredible songwriter; she wrote Wrecking Ball. This is a gift beyond, beyond. Like, I cry. Because, you know, when people write these songs, it’s a part of them and then they give it to you, and it’s such a blessing. I’m very grateful to have this song; it means the world to me. It really just is exactly how I feel in my life right now. And if you’re going through anything, hopefully it will help you the way that it helped me. Cannonball helped me then, and this is my song now.
instagram

Words can’t explain how happy I am right now

Made with Instagram
#11YearsWithSuperJunior

051106—161106;; Super Junior’s 11th Anniversary

I can’t explain in words how thankful I am to see our boys accomplish this. Just some time ago, we celebrated 4000 days. 4000. Days. That doesn’t happen to many groups, and I would love for Super Junior to celebrate thousands of more days. I’m so happy I recognize these boys and appreciate them even more now. I’m so proud of calling myself an Ever-Lasting Friend. It’s different with Super Junior.. I actually feel like I’m their friend. I can’t find any other group that can give me a better feeling than them.

Super Junior is the strongest group I’ve ever seen. They have fallen so many times, getting treated like trash by their own company, car accidents, members leaving, scandals, enlistments, etc. But they always come back up, stronger than ever. Super Junior is truly The Last Man Standing.

They are absolutely hilarious. I can’t explain how many times they have made me smile and laugh whenever I feel sad. Just the thought of them reassures me so much, I love all of the inside jokes they have. Like almost disbanding over a water prank, and dressing up as legit everything and anything (a special honor to the vegetable costumes and the Elsa costumes). The members write their own fanfics of other members. The fact that they pulled a prank on the same member leaving the group TWO TIMES, and yet the members still fell for it, is hilarious but meaningful. The amount of times they have kissed each other is so normal for us, but legendary. May I remind you Super Junior has a movie dedicated to throwing shit at boys?? Attack of the Pin-Up Boys is truly iconic.

But their family bond is the most beautiful thing I have ever seen. There is no group as genuine as Super Junior these days. They still mention their ex-members and vise versa in 2016. They diss each other so often, but at the end of the day, they all care for one another. I admire that about them, that even all of their parents are best friends with each other.

They might be older, but they’re most experienced and talented. They might not be trendy anymore, but they left their mark as legends. They stick together despite everything they’ve gone through. Super Junior was simply an idea that was meant to last a few months, but now they’re still here, after 11 years. They are such humble, kind, and caring seniors who are always supporting their juniors. They make fun of us ELFs as well, and we do it back to them because our relationship is so much more than a fan and an idol. They promise to always remain as Super Junior, even after they start living normal lives by getting married and having kids. Disbanding isn’t a concern at all, because even if that happens (which is very unlikely), they will remain as a close family for the rest of their lives.

There is such amazing and unique vocals, rapping, dancing, and all sorts of other talents each member holds. Their composed songs and directed music videos are so beautiful to see and hear. Super Junior does so much, especially for us ELFs. I’m so thankful they try their best to connect with every single fan, always attempting to keep communication with them. Super Junior is undefeatable.

So why do I love Super Junior? Simply because they’re Super Junior. That’s all. ♡

2

So saturday night was so special and amazing! During Chasing Ghosts I crowd surfed and was yelling the lyrics at the top of my lungs and joel was pointing to me so when i got down, he bent off the stage and gave me a high five and handed me the mic. I sang a line for the chorus and started to hand it back but he just smiled, nodded, and let me keep it, so we sang the rest of the chorus together. I am so happy that @xpeesx (on twitter/instagram) captured this. Words can’t explain how much love I have for this band!

What is it like to fall in love with him? I would say love is a beautiful feeling, no matter how many times you get hurt, you’ll still fall in love over and over. And i am falling in love with him over and over. It’s like a wind, i didn’t see it coming but i got hit really hard the moment it touches me and it feels really good, because it touches my heart and soul. It was an unexplainable feeling that i can’t even explain into words.  All i know is that when i start to fall for him, my heart is filled with so much happiness and love. I don’t know exactly when I did fall in love with him, all i can say the moment i fell in love with him is that it’s the greatest feeling i’ve ever felt in my entire life and that i’ve never felt this kind of love and happiness before he came. Falling in love with him is a gift and a blessing because i have finally found my better half, my family and my home. I’d say falling in love with him it is the only time in my life when i feel so sure of something. Really sure.
—  and i do really love him
2

⭐️ Happy Astro Day ⭐️
365 days since those beans debuted and although I haven’t been with them from the start, I know I’ll be with them til the end (forever basically). Also no words can explain how happy, proud, and thankful I am for these boys~ ♥️

Also it’s aroha selca day, thanks for tagging me @astrobinwoo~ Usually I’d be tagging specific arohas but honestly whoever sees this I’m tagging you! Since I know Arohas are beautiful inside and out and it would be nice to see you beauties on a great day like this! 💖

anonymous asked:

Hi there, I was wondering if you could help me with a question. I experience romantic attraction, but sometimes I don't, at all. Like there's sometimes I am all for it, and I want to be in a relationship, but then there are other times where I'm so... disgusted by it? Like, I want nothing to do with it. I'm in a relationship and I'm happy to have that partnership, but I don't know how to explain to my partner what I'm feeling. Can you help? Is there even a word for what I'm feeling?

It sounds like you are a bit romanced repulsed to me

How can I explain to you, my happiness, my golden wonderful happiness, how much I am all yours — with all my memories, poems, outbursts, inner whirlwinds? Or explain that I cannot write a word without hearing how you will pronounce it — and can’t recall a single trifle I’ve lived through without regret — so sharp! — that we haven’t lived through it together — whether it’s the most, the most personal, intransmissible — or only some sunset or other at the bend of a road — you see what I mean, my happiness?

And I know: I can’t tell you anything in words — and when I do on the phone then it comes out completely wrong. Because with you one needs to talk wonderfully, the way we talk with people long gone… in terms of purity and lightness and spiritual precision… You can be bruised by an ugly diminutive — because you are so absolutely resonant — like seawater, my lovely.

I swear — and the inkblot has nothing to do with it — I swear by all that’s dear to me, all I believe in — I swear that I have never loved before as I love you, — with such tenderness — to the point of tears — and with such a sense of radiance

—  Vladimir Nabokov to his beloved, Véra
We are growing so fast !

We have already 120 subscribers on this blog and this don’t stop to rise ! 

And I don’t have the words to explain how happy I am !

And for the 120 followers I will organise a session of commissions on my main blog ! ( @pealley )

(Don’t worry if it have nothing on it, I have clean the blog earlier in the week ~)

I will begin to do the commissions on monday 27 february and finish on sunday 5 march.

The ask box will be open today to take the commissions ~

For more informations, I’ll make a post on my main blog and reblog it here, so you can stay informed ! 

people don't do this enough, so I'm going to do it now . (please read this)

all I see towards the boys now is hate. hate for everything they do and it’s tearing our fandom apart. from people telling Luke to kill himself and people telling calum he isn’t important. it needs to stop. I’m going to go through every boy and say something I love about them.

LUKE: whenever Luke sings a higher note, I’ve noticed how his voice doesn’t really crack but goes really high? I don’t know how to explain it. a song I’ve notice it in is broken home, when he sings “when did you lose your happiness” in the beginning of the word happiness his voice does something beautiful to me and I am in love with it. it’s so beautiful to me. another thing i noticed it in is vapor. I watched a video of vapor live (which if you scroll down on my blog you’ll see it maybe) you can hear it.

CALUM: I love his little eye wrinkles. (crinkles? I don’t know what you guys call them but I call them wrinkles) whenever calum gets happy and starts laughing hard he has little eye wrinkles around his eyes and I think they are beyond beautiful. I feel like sometimes he may feel insecure about them but to me it’s a sign that he is happy in the moment and it’s something I never want to end.

ASHTON: he’s always positive, always has something to say to make you feel better about yourself. he constantly tells us he loves us and that he’s thankful for us. no matter what we’re going through in life he is like a little reminder that it will all be okay. that quality is something I look for in a person and not everyone has it. nowadays everyone is so negative towards everything but he is always bringing the spirits up from what I see.

MICHAEL: Michael is unique to me. some people say he doesn’t have the greatest voice, personally I am in love with his voice, but you can see how passionate he is about what he does. I can see it when he sings certain songs and his voice can’t hit all the notes every time but it doesn’t stop him and he puts his emotions into it.

ALL TOGETHER: we should be more appreciative of them. no matter what they do or say, they’re still our boys that came from a little town in Sydney Australia. they do what they do to help us because they care and love for us. they are my second family. this fandom is my second family. I feel like with all of the girlfriend drama people forget to appreciate what they do for us and let them know we love them. no matter what they do or say I’ll always be here.

let me know what you love about them:)

How can I explain to you, my happiness, my golden wonderful happiness, how much I am all yours — with all my memories, poems, outbursts, inner whirlwinds? Or explain that I cannot write a word without hearing how you will pronounce it — and can’t recall a single trifle I’ve lived through without regret — so sharp! — that we haven’t lived through it together — whether it’s the most, the most personal, intransmissible — or only some sunset or other at the bend of a road — you see what I mean, my happiness?
And I know: I can’t tell you anything in words — and when I do on the phone then it comes out completely wrong. Because with you one needs to talk wonderfully, the way we talk with people long gone… in terms of purity and lightness and spiritual precision… You can be bruised by an ugly diminutive — because you are so absolutely resonant — like seawater, my lovely.
I swear — and the inkblot has nothing to do with it — I swear by all that’s dear to me, all I believe in — I swear that I have never loved before as I love you, — with such tenderness — to the point of tears — and with such a sense of radiance.
—  Vladimir Nabokov, letters to Véra, November 1923

“I am bipolar” I am it, it is me, we are one. No separation, bipolar is every bit of who I am.
“I am bipolar” because I can’t ever decide between calm and quiet or outgoing on those stupid little surveys because it can and has changed every single day.
“I am bipolar” because sometimes I get excited, too excited, too happy, too…much.
“I am bipolar” because I can explain to you in five words and I can explain to you in ten thousand words what it means to be numb and exactly how it feels to have it spread down to your fingertips.
“I am bipolar” because the snapping of a twig has quite literally set me into tears, and I still don’t even know why.
“I am bipolar” because my own voice inside my own head repeats the words you’ve said to me over the years over and over until I want to bash my head on the ground.
“I am bipolar” because his perfectly harmless bright purple sweater annoys me to the ends of this earth and I could never in all the time I have, tell you why it does.
“I am bipolar” because sometimes I can’t sleep to save the life of someone who’s life actually means something to me.
“I am bipolar” because weeks and even months later you can’t possibly keep my eyes from drooping.
“I am bipolar” because it’s not only written but carved so deeply into my DNA I couldn’t imagine it not being there.
“I am bipolar” because my brain could be called a little messy, no matter how many boxes I sort it into.
“I am bipolar” but
I am not Bipolar Disorder. I am not Manic Depressive Disorder. I am not what you say I am.
I am only a girl. I am only a poet. I am only the boxes I put myself into not what you put me into. I am only a person with a special way of thinking that you decided to label.

3

PART 1 of my @redbubble haul,

*excited screaming*

*crying*

O MY GAWD,

Words cant explain how happy and exited I am to have these. These stickers are great quality and ssooooo PREETTTY!!

I can’t wait to decorate my school books with these, going to fangirl during my classes (or just all day long).

These stickers are made by @meabhd
And they are as beautifull as her personality, she has been really kind to me and even put her mates drawing and more on her redbubble acount available as stickers for me. She is a wonderfull person and makes amazing art.

one year ago  I found the term aromantic

One year ago I found a word for the things I was feeling, technically not feeling. 

One year ago, I cried, because having a word for my identity made it real, and I wasn’t  ready for it to be real.

One year ago, I wondered if I was going to die sad and alone. 

One year ago, I was a mess, and I didn’t  know how I was going to make it through. 

One year ago, I thought I was broken, or wrong.

One year later, I am not only a proud aromantic, but a proud asexual. 

One year later, I know words like squish, and zucchini,  words that  describe feelings and things I didn’t  know how to name before.

One year later, I can silently laugh when my family asks about romantic interests. Or when my mom talks about grandchildren.

One year later, I am not out to my family, but I’m  happy, and I don’t  feel like I need to explain myself.

One year later I know that I am not broken, and I am valid and loved

One year later, I pity that girl who was  just discovering herself, and I wish I could tell her that in a year, she’d  feel so differently.

A year makes a huge difference. If you are just not discovering your identity, or if you are struggling to accept yourself, please have hope. It won’t  always be this way. You are valif, and perfect , and one day you’ll  see that and accept it. Don’t  ever be afraid to be your beautiful  self, and  don’t ever be ashamed of who you are, cause you’re  a fucking goddess. Or god. Whatever floats your boat.

Just be patient, it’ll  all be okay. And I’m  here if you ever need to talk.