a message from women:
do you know what it’s like to be left alone in love?
do you know what it’s like to feel stuck in love?
do you know what it’s like to be too depressed?
do you know what it’s like to have to beg for
forever from a person who neglects your history?
do you what it’s like to lose everything?
do you know what it’s like to feel abandoned?
do you know what it’s like to wait?
do you know that i will never be too near or too far away?
honestly, i’m still waiting for closure.
i still question what this is— or what this was?
because i can’t help but hope
our feelings were mutual.
do you know how it feels to constantly chase
a feeling you’re addicted to?
do you know i’ve got the jones for you.
and an appetite. and a sweet tooth.
do you know i prayed for you?
from night ’til day.
regardless of my better judgement or dismay
time after time after promises
that never seemed impossible or too good to be TRUE.
do you know what it’s like to try
convincing yourself that— this was the truth.
like i was the woman created for you.
do you know how much i’ve craved you?
i’ve searched for you everywhere
in people, in prayer, in psalm.
in different lovers, in god.
and god— i, wish you really knew.
that i’d love you till death,
or that i’d kill for you.
or that i feel you, like soul deep, like
deeper than anyone ever will.
do you know what it’s like to feel dead inside
and see you so alive, still?
but these days i feel alive.
i’ve been able to realize
you just weren’t meant for me.
these days i don’t cry over
or lost love
or things i have no control of.
these days i just love myself more.
i just know there’s a happily ever after.
these days i just — don’t see it with you.
nothing personal i think i just fell too quick for your potential.
i just wanted you to be the one.
i just thought we made sense
but now i love myself enough to know better..
at some point you have to sit with yourself and learn who you are. you have to take responsibility for the way you’ve been treating yourself and the way you’ve allowed others to break you down. you have to go back to wherever you abandoned your love for self - thinking that someone’s love for you is more important than your own - and pick you back up! you have to ask yourself, “why do I treat others better than I treat my own self?” then you have to accept yourself.. because at the end of the day, the only person who’s forced to deal with the broken pieces of you, is you. don’t fault yourself for any of the past - just accept who you are today. accept your truths, your hurt, and your heart. and finally, you have to love YOU. love every piece of you - and never ever let anyone come in and damage you again. Heal your heart and Protect yourself better.