word lovers

He loved her a lot
but not in the right way
at least not the way
she deserved to be loved
for a whole lifetime.
—  kenzie lawson
Teaser & Some Information

Hi all, so I’ve been writing a collection of poetry inspired by having a teacher crush. It isn’t at all obvious that it has anything to do with the tc however and is more or less a collection of work inspired by unrequited or impossible love. I’d like to share three pieces with you as a teaser so you can get a little idea of what the rest of it will hold, help me share it with this community and others while also supporting my work.

I’ve decided I’m going to do this as a PDF through my online BigCartel Store for a small donation of $5 per ebook, how this will work is you make your purchase on the site, adding your email address in your purchase information and I will be able to send you your digital copy. It’s a proper ebook with pretty graphics, a cover, dedication, etc.

Please follow my blog for the release and I will post links when it’s all up and ready to go - which should be really soon!

I really hope you guys enjoy my work and I would be delighted if you could support it! x x x

Now, on with the teasers!

Please post in my ASK box if you have any questions and or comments on the work and please please please let me know what you think of it.

-

There was a time not that long ago when the only kind of intimacy I had ever known were the long looks over a cup of coffee in lonely café’s on Sunday afternoons, brown eyes sinking deeper into browner eyes on the other side of the room and then never being sure if your heart was racing because of the caffeine now coursing through your veins or something else entirely. It was easier back then, your mind might linger on someone a little too long but it always gently eased you into a sleep filled with vivid simplicity. Where eyes were as large as the moon and a smile was all it took to ignite something akin to love. It was the time in which my heart existed completely untarnished. A time when everything I knew was one dimensional, including myself. It was before all of this - before you. Before we lost our senses in a pool of red wine and cigarette smoke, before days rolled into nights and hunger was easier to cope with than your absence. I was smaller then – rounded with little edges but now I am shaped like a knife with sunset eyes.

- Before you

-

I wear my acceptance blindly because I love the lies told by his lips and the way they curve my own into a smile that aches more than it feels good and the fact that I can no longer tell the difference between those two things. My fingers search my body for that freeing feeling that comes in the form of soft moans and stained bed sheets but I fear my orgasm is broken or at least will no longer come when I call it. My orgasm has left me for another man, one who’s fingers are longer and much more delicate than my own, a man who’s name I keep tucked in the crook of my neck like some long healed scar that has formed a ridge between me and my bones. A man who knows where to pull pleasure from and where to return it to when he is done. A man who knows all of these things yet at the same time does not know his affect, doesn’t know the simplest of actions have the largest affect on me, yet my orgasm has grown numb to it because I need those hands, not my own.

- My orgasm is broken

-

It was the mystery of your sadness that drew me in, the kind that seemed to burn you alive. Every time you opened your delicate smile up to the world and parted your teeth to talk I could see the flames licking at your tongue and I wondered a lot about you. I wondered about the curve in your lips and how that might taste, especially after a night spent wasting time over books that had know far more hands than your body had. I wondered at the possibility that you might just be all I needed and even more so at the chance that perhaps you were enough all on your own. I wondered at the grave of dead memories that must be floating around in your subconscious at any given moment and I wondered if you would let me caress them on nights when you found me lost in sleep, I wondered if you would ever join me - and if you didn’t, if there would ever be a time when days would have passed without the sound of your voice running through me on repeat.

- You found me lost in sleep

anonymous asked:

Hi, so I'm not sure if tumblr are my ask or not but I'm looking for a fic where it's a Highschool AU and D and P were paired for a project on poetry? I remember their poems were connected and had the word "Lover". Thanks!

does anyone know this fic?

- Eliza

Monday 8:27am
I woke up with you on my mind.
You called me babe last night —
my heart is still pounding.

Tuesday 10:53pm
Today I realized we won’t work.
What we are is hurting her.
And I think she matters more to me than you do.

Wednesday 11:52pm
I broke things off with you today.
She barely said a word.
I’ve never regretted anything more than this.

Thursday 4:03pm
I shouldn’t have sent that message.
You shouldn’t have been so okay with receiving it.

Friday 9:57pm
I almost messaged you today.
I didn’t.

Saturday 8:49pm
I’m walking around town in search of alcohol.
They say that liquor numbs the pain of having a broken heart.
I want to put that to the test.

Sunday 2:32am
I heard you texted a girl you’ve never spoken to before.
I wonder if it’s because you’re trying to replace me.
I can’t help but wish you weren’t.
I thought I was irreplaceable.

—  a week with you on my mind, c.j.n.