woody head

Wait a moment. Groot doesn’t like hats, right? But what does a tiny tree-child consider a hat?

I mean, he thought Yondu’s badge was supposed to be a hat, or that Rocket needed a toe or a desk instead of a fin. Groot doesn’t really seem to have a concept for things and their correct names, most likely because he’s still a little child in this form.

So it would be very likely that when Kraglin got the fin implanted, Groot just noted “It’s on his head” and thought it’s a hat.

And Groot doesn’t really like hats. But Kraglin and Peter seem to like the new “hat”.

Cue in here Kraglin, still a bit insecure about his new look (and damn, that’s one hell of a weird feeling, having a steel attachment on your head, not to mention the headache), gets confronted by a very serious Groot, who tugs at him to get his attention. Once the former Ravager looks down, Groot declares, “I am Groot!”

“Um,” Kraglin flails, still not knowing how that is supposed to be a language the little tree is using there, never mind how to understand it. “Rocket?”

“What?” Rocket looks up from his newest invention, frowning when Groot whips around to him, repeating his words. “Oh. He says he noticed your new hat.”

“My new…what?”

“I am Groot.”

“…I think he means the fin.”

“Oh,” Kraglin ponders that for a moment, before, “But that’s not a hat, Groot.”

“I am Groot”

“He doesn’t get it,” Rocket explains, huffing, “Because it’s on your head and only hats go onto your head.”

“’kay, I guess ye could see it as a hat, but why’s that important?”

“I am Groot.”

He wants you to know that he doesn’t like hats.”

“I am Groot.”

“Because they make heads look weird – I already told you, that’s bullshit, Groot.”

“I am Groot!”

“It is!”

Kraglin rolls his eyes, sighing. “Guys, seriously – not important.”

Groot seems to think so, too, because he tugs at whatever bit of Kraglin’s jacket that he can reach again. “I am Groot.”  

Rocket falls eerily silent, not further translating, and the stony look on his face makes Kraglin worry. “What? What ‘e say?”

“He said he will overlook the hat and the weird headform, though, because you’re happy about it.” Rocket seems hesitant to translate the rest, but both Groot and Kraglin stare at him expectantly, and he grumbles. “And he wants all of his family to be happy.”

“…Oh.”

Now it’s Kraglin who falls silent, speechless by the declaration. Not sure if he should acknowledge the lump in his throat and the burning in his eyes.

But Groot looks up at him with big eyes, waiting for something, and Kraglin manages a weak smile, carefully patting the woody head with one fingertip. “Uh, thanks, lil’ twig.”

“I am Groot!” Groot happily hugs Kraglin as well as he can, standing on his knees, before he hops down and scampers off again, declaring very loudly, “I am Groot!”

Rocket’s chortle seems very close to a rasp, more so than a real laugh, but his teeth glint in a smirk. “He just hopes that no one else will get a hat now.”

Kraglin huffs a laugh and shakes his head at that, secretly rubbing his eyes. “Don’t think so.”

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TO EVERYONE THAT REALLY WAS CURIOUS WHAT WENDIGO DICK LAUGHTER SOUNDS LIKE.. 

AS SOON AS I WROTE IT ON THE CAPTIONS I IMMEDIATELY THOUGHT OF THIS IN MY HEAD AND IT MADE ME CHOKE ON MY FUCKZDFKGBG SODA.

@lilyshadowwriter, @shandykey

When I make too many pun jokes in front of my friends.

Toy Story MBTI

Woody – ESTJ

“All right, that’s enough! Look, we’re all very impressed with Andy’s new toy.”

Woody enjoys his position as Andy’s favorite toy, and he works to keep things that way.  He is not welcoming of change, especially that which threatens his place among the other toys (and in Andy’s eyes).  He’s naturally quite talented at taking control of situations, and enjoys organizing the other toys.  Woody is also fairly tied to keeping things the way they always have been, but a wild adventure shows him through experience how he can open up and find room for another favorite toy to share his place.


Buzz Lightyear – ESFP

“Excuse me, I think the word you’re searching for is ‘Space Ranger’.”

Buzz is an adventurer.  He believes so strongly in his own belief of who he is and what his mission is that he is even blind to aspects of reality.  He lives for the moment and for his own dreams.  Unlike Woody who seeks power as well, Buzz just loves the attention that he receives as the fascinating new toy.  When what he believes so strongly is shown as false to him, Buzz is crushed.  But he finds new purpose and a way to be a space ranger for real, among his fellow toy friends.


Rex – ISFP

“Well, I mean, uh, I don’t like confrontations!”

Rex is very in tune with his own personality and how everything affects him.  He commonly remarks about his internal state, often based on his surroundings and the events that are taking place.  He wants to be more adventurous than he feels he is, but his happiness in direct experiences is still clear.  Rex is sensitive and generally soft-spoken, often underestimating himself.


Mr. Potatohead – ESTJ

“Wait just a minute here. What are you trying to pull?”

Mr. Potatohead is practically minded and doesn’t mind taking charge, which he does readily when things get out of control.  He bases decisions on past evidence, sometimes drawing conclusions a bit too hastily.  But he means well, naturally trying to keep everyone safe and do the best thing to do.


Slinky – ISFJ

“I knew you’d come back!”

Slinky is faithful to Woody the longest of all the toys.  He is determined to see the best in his friend and leader who he respects and follows.  He is often one helping out, putting his slinky abilities to use!  Slinky is generally more of a quiet observer, staying out of the fray of things but always ready to lend a helping paw.


Bo Peep – ISFJ

“Will you boys stop it?”

Generally one of the more observant, reserved toys, Bo Peep does have a good understanding of others and likes to keep situations peaceful.  She knows when a good time to speak up is, and she’s naturally very caring over her sheep.


Andy – ENFP

“Pizza Planet! Yeah!”

Andy is a fun-loving, imaginative boy.  He is enjoys imagining worlds with his toys, even building his own room around those worlds that fascinate him most.  He is kind and caring towards his toys, and with them he explores all sorts of possibilities.


Sid – ISTP 

“No-one has ever attempted a double bypass brain transplant before.”

Sid is a thinker, and one often absorbed in his odd world of mutating and destroying his toys.  He likes action and physically experimenting with things, and he enjoys thinking about them and figuring out interesting ways of going about his fun.