wooden fork

  • Nora: You know Ren, I was thinking about something.
  • Ren: What's that?
  • Nora: Well, you know how when that Grimm attacked our village, we hid under that house until it was safe?
  • Ren: Yeah?
  • Nora: And then after I hugged you, you went out onto the street and grabbed that wooden hammer and gave it to me?
  • Ren: I do.
  • Nora: And that's a huge reason why I wanted my huntress weapon to be a giant hammer?
  • Ren: *cracks a small smile* Yeah- what about it?
  • Nora: Well, what if it hadn't been a hammer? Like, what if it had been a shovel or something?
  • Ren: What?
  • Nora: I mean, a hammer is really cool, but what if it had been something less cool? What if it was some wooden puppet or a fork or something?
  • Ren: Nora-
  • Nora: Would I have been inspired by that? Would I be beating up monsters and bad guys with like, a giant doll or gardening spade today?
  • Ren: ... Nora, eat your breakfast.
Things I Want Duck Newton’s Mystic Weapon To Be:
  • An ornate curtain rod
  • A Game Boy Color carved out of soap
  • An illustrated Xtreme Teen Bible
  • A giant wooden fork used for kitchen decor
  • The magnetron out of a 1970s microwave
  • A baseball bat that was struck by lightning
  • A cordless NES Advantage controller
  • The stick shift from a postal van
  • A bo staff made from recycled Crystal Pepsi cans
  • Nunchaku but it’s two plush geese chained together

my dad used to spank me when i was a child, but not with a belt, sometimes it would be a giant wooden spoon or fork [decorative shit] and slap me as hard as he can, and then when i was “old enough” he stopped but ive come to recently notice he didnt stop abusing me. it became emotional, i figured it out last year, why when he screamed at me i cowered in fear, why i cant speak back when he yells, why when he raises his voice, even if it is not at me, i have to leave the room to hide my tears.

why i cant cry in front of another person out of fear of being belittled and feeling embarassed. why i lock my extreme emotion and dont open up to him. i was molded into this shell of a human without even knowing. god i want it all to just stop please

Christmas Miracles

Pairing: Ryan Haywood x Reader
Day 20 of Fics Advent Calendar 2017. Read the others here

A/N: Some sweet Christmas fluff for my dear friend @achievementhuntersrage. She’s a brilliant writer, and an even better person. If you haven’t checked her out, please do on either tumblr or on AO3. I hope you like this, Rage xxx

Summary: Surprise Christmas date to see the lights turning on it.
wc: 1127

You stare listless at the screen, render bar creeping ever so slowly as cold shivers through an office abandoned with the encroaching dark. Trevor meets you’re glance with dismay, frowning at his phone before sighing.

“You head out, Y/N. I’ve got to lock up anyways.”

“You sure?” you ask, already standing and shrugging on your bag, burrowing into your scarf. “I can stay.”

“You’ve done the late night shift for the past 4 days, fuck off and have fun. Better yet,” he nudges you in the back, your chuckles stumbling through the door, “go have a lie down. You need to sleep.”

“I’ll sleep eventually,” you mumble, waving goodbye and weaving through the hallways seeping with cold.

Tugging your Christmas sweater’s sleeves over your fingers, the air bites as soon as you step through the exit. Your breath fogs, clouds covering the pin prick stars shining down upon the sparse car park. It’s surprisingly peaceful, the nothingness ringing with a comfortable silence while you wander through, head bent skyward and eyes mystified by the moon.

“Y/N, wait up.”

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Market Place (Tom Glynn-Carney x Reader) Part of the “Dada’s Girl” Series

Requested by anon: Hi Ash. Just wanted to let you know that the last part of the Dada’s Girl/How to Parent Series left me so so soft. Can I request one for Dada’s Girl where you three are spending a sunday afternoon walking around some classic place like a fruit market or something then you stop to buy something and while you’re paying for it you just watch Tom and Elise being cute with each other? Have a nice day! love your writing. X

AN: I made it Christmas-esque because it just reminded me of Birmingham’s German Christmas Market and it’s great there and Elise would love it if she actually existed. 

Masterlist     Gif Credit

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10

Late morning sunlight filtered through the windows of Golgotha Manor and spilled across the intricately patterned rug that adorned the floor of the living room. Adorning the crushed velvet chaise lounge though, with ebony hair hung below her soft, porcelain jawline and her scarlett lips pursed in a sort of regal boredom, was none other than Morwenna Golgotha herself. Diamonds, a trademark of her attire, sat in her ear lobes, white, reflecting the light, toying with it like an infant with a rattle. But another, much more significant one sat atop a silver band, adorning her ring finger just as she adorned her husband’s arm. Her husband’s status. Her husband’s life.

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Gluten Free Vegan Hamantaschen 

Ingredients : 

  • 2 chia “eggs” (directions below)
  • 1 cup sugar
  • ¼ cup coconut oil, melted
  • 1 tsp vanilla
  • 2 ¼ cups GF flour blend (I used king arthur) 
  • ½ tsp xanthum gum
  • 1 tsp baking powder
  • ¼ tsp salt
  • 1 to 5 tsp water (if needed)
  • Nonstick cooking oil spray
  • Thick filling of choice. I did multiple versions, one of which was a thick berry jam and also a savory version that a mixture of pumpkin puree, curry powder and salt! 
  • 2 baking sheets, a rolling pin, a cutting board (or other flat service). 

Procedure : 

  • To make your chia eggs, take 2 tbsp of chia seeds and grind them in a food processor or coffee grinder (which is what I used). Add 6 tbsp of water and let sit in the fridge for at least 15 minutes, preferably more till it forms a thick gel that is similar to an egg! 
  • Pre heat your oven to 350 degrees
  • Melt your coconut oil in the microwave for 30 seconds. 
  • In a mixing bowl, whisk together the chia “eggs”, sugar, coconut oil, and vanilla.
  • In another bowl, mix together the GF flour, baking powder, xanthum gum and salt. 
  • Slowly stir the dry ingredients into the wet, using a large wooden spoon or sturdy fork until combined into a smooth dough. 
  • Add a little water if necessary. 
  • Stick bowl in the freezer for 10 minutes (not longer!) to make it easier to handle. 
  • Lightly flour a smooth, clean surface. Use a rolling pin to roll the dough out to ¼ -1/8 of an inch thick, just make sure that the dough is still thick enough to hold the filling and its shape! 
  • Lightly flour the rolling pin or dough occasionally to prevent sticking, if necessary. 
  • Use a 3-inch rim of a glass or cookie cutter (no smaller!) to cut circles out of the dough, cutting as many as you can. 
  • Gather the scraps and roll them out again. Cut circles. Repeat process until all the dough is gone. 
  • Place a teaspoon of filling (whichever filling you choose) into the center of each circle. If you use too much filling, you run the risk of your hamantaschen opening and filling spilling out during baking. 
  • To assemble the hamantaschen, grasp the left side of the circle and fold it towards the center to make a flap that covers the left third of the circle.
  • Grasp the right side of the circle and fold it towards the center, overlapping the upper part of the left side flap to create a triangular tip at the top of the circle. A small triangle of filling should still be visible in the center.
  • Grasp the bottom part of the circle and fold it upward to create a third flap and complete the triangle. 
  • Pinch each corner of the triangle gently but firmly to secure the shape and hold the filling in. Repeat. 
  • When all of your hamantaschen have been filled, place them evenly on a lightly greased baking sheet. They shouldn’t expand much during baking, so your gap doesn’t need to be big in between cookies. 
  • Let them bake at 350 degrees F for 20-25 minutes, till the cookies are cooked through and lightly golden.
  • Cool the cookies on a wire rack. Store them in a tightly sealed plastic bag or Tupperware.

For me, this made 1 cookie sheet’s worth of pretty thick cookies (About 15) . If I had been more comfortable making them thinner, it might have needed 2 sheets. 

Bad Boys Are Bad Boys 17

Part 15 & 16

You looked at yourself in the mirror and smiled at yourself. For dinner you had decided to go with the old you that wore the vintage clothing. You had chosen a black dress with a white floral pattern that covered the whole dress. Amelia had given you a white beaded necklace with matching earrings, but you did keep in your nose ring. “Are you ready?” Calum asked poking his head in your window.

 "I am,“ You said turning around and smiling at him.

 "You look amazing. As always,” Calum said as you walked over to the window.

 "Thank you. Are you going to make me crawl out of the window or can I use the door?“ You asked kneeling down and crossing your arms.

 "You can use the door today,” Calum said smiling. You laughed and leaned in, pressing your lips to his before you stood up and grabbed your shoes.

 "There’s my boy,“ Calum laughed as Busted ran over to the window. You slipped on your shoes and looked over at Calum smiling when you saw him playing with your puppy.

 "I will meet you by the front door,” You said before walking out of your room and out of the front door, Calum already there.

 "Hi,“ Calum said smiling.

 "Hi,” You chuckled as Calum grabbed your hand, walking you toward his house. You had only been in his house a couple of times. No one was ever there and you had never been in his room, but it was nice to see a little bit of Calum’s life.

 "Mum, we’re here,“ Calum said as you guys walked in. You heard a pot drop to the floor before Calum’s mum came running out making you laugh.

 "Hello,” You said smiling.

 "Hello! It’s so nice to meet you,“ Calum’s mum said running up and hugging you.  

 "It’s nice to meet you too Mrs. Hood,” You said smiling.

 "Oh please call me Joy,“ She laughed pulling away and as Calum’s father walked up.

 "And call me David. Calum’s told us a lot about you,” He said smiling.

 "Good things I hope,“ You said smiling as you looked over at Calum. He smiled at his parents and then at you somehow making you feel right at home.

 ”(Y/N)!“ Mali Koa said running up.

 "Hi! It’s nice to finally meet you,” You laughed as she hugged you.

 "Calum has told us so much about you. I feel like I’ve known you for years,“ She laughed wrapping her arms around her brother.

 "Alright I don’t talk that much,” Calum laughed as he ran his hands through his hair, telling you that he was nervous.

 "Calum, everything you talk you’re talking about (Y/N) or music,“ His sister laughed.

 "Alright we’ll be in my room. Doors opened,” Calum said grabbing your hand and pulling down away from his family.

 "Calum, I was enjoying talking to your family,“ You chuckled as he pulled you along.

 "I was not,” Calum said punning you into his room. “I would much rather have you to myself.”

 "Well I’m flattered,“ You said looking around his room. It was just as you excepted it to be. There were CDs all over his desk, along with a laptop and pads of paper. His bed was made but you assumed that it was normally a mess. His bass was in the corner along with a guitar making you smile. Calum watched as you walked over to his desk, looking down at his music collection.

 "What do you think?” He asked watching you.

 "About your room or music collection?“ You chuckled looking back up at him. He smiled and walked over to you, wrapping his arms around your waist and kissing your shoulder.

 "Both I guess,” Calum said laying his chin on your shoulder. You sighed and looked at his CDs, pushing som aside. “What’s wrong?” Calum asked.

 "When I first got here all I wanted to do was go back to San Fransisco and now I don’t know what to do,“ You admitted.

 "Do what you want to do,” Calum said nodding.  

 "Really?“ You asked turning around.

 "Yeah. You would do that same thing for me,” Calum said nodding. “It may put the plans I wanted for us behind a bit but I think you should follow what you want.”

 "I want you,“ You said grabbing his shirt and lightly pulling him to you, making him smile. Calum pressed his lips to yours and you grabbed his neck to pull your body to his.  

 "Just Kiss Me and tell me that I’ll see you again before you leave,” Calum said making you laugh.

 "I’ll be sure to do that,“ You said nodding as you laid your hands on Calum’s chest.

 "Calum, dinner is ready,” Mali Koa said poking her head into the room. “Oh sorry. Was I interrupting something?”

 "No,“ You and Calum said at the same time. You both looked at each other and smiled before walking back to the kitchen and sitting down at the table where the pasta  and bread were out and ready to eat.    

 "Help yourself,” Joy said sitting down across from you and pushing the bowl towards you.

 "This looks so good,“ You said smiling as you took the wooden spoon and a fork, putting the pasta on your plate.

 "Mum is a fantastic cook,” Calum said making his mum blush.

 "Oh stop it,“ She said making you chuckle. After everyone got their food the conversation started. You tried not to talk about your life from back in San Fransisco, but your mum had told them about your school and your friends, malign it harder not to talk about it.

 "Mum, can we talk about something else please?” Calum asked as he grabbed your hand from under the table. He could tell that you were uncomfortable talking about San Fransisco and your father, but they didn’t know that the subject was touchy with you so you didn’t stop them.

 "Let’s talk about your outfits. I see you and your mate all of them time and you always look amazing,“ Mali Koa said making you laugh.

 "My friend, Amelia, likes to pick out my clothes. If you want I can show you were we get our clothes,” You offered making Calum smile.

 "So, tell us about Forensic Anthropology,“ David said making you smile.

 "Well, my dad got me into it and honesty it’s really a fantastic subject,” You said nodding, starting to talk about the tv shows and the criminology side.  

 "I see you’ve got everything planned out,“ Joy said nodding.

 "I try to get the outline fingered out but everything in between in a surprise,” You said smiling. Calum squeezed your hand making you smile. Talking to his parents was easier than you had originally thought but when Calum squeezed your hand, reminding him that he was there, made everything easier. After you talked about glasses and then about Calum’s music you helped clear the table.

 "You make Calum really happy,“ Joy whispered.

 "You think so?” You asked looking up and smiling at Calum talking to his father.

 "Ive never really seen him act the way he did tonight at dinner,“ Joy said smiling as she rinsed the plates, handing them over to you so you could dry them.  

 “And how was that?” You asked as Calum looked over at you, watching you and his mum speak.

 “Well he smiled a lot and actually joined the conversation about something other than music and when he was holding your hand he seemed peaceful,” Joy said nodding as you finished drying up the last dish.

 “Mum, if you don’t mind I would like to have my date for the evening back,” Calum said walking up.

 “Of course,” She said chuckled.

 “Come on babe,” Calum said grabbing your hand and pulling you back to his room. He closed the door and turned to you, grabbing your waist and pulling you to him as he crashed his lips to yours. You ran your hands down his sides and ti his waist before reaching in his back pocket and freezing. Calum pulled away and looked at you, fear striking him when he saw your facial expression.

 “I hope this isn’t what I think it is,” You said smiling as you pulled a pack of cigarettes into your view.

 “Princess, I wasn’t going to smoke those,” He said making you laugh.

 “I know,” You said backing away and walking to the trash bin, throwing them away. Calum laughed and walked up to you, pressing his lips to yours before looking into your eyes and smiling. “Now what was that for?” You asked grabbing his waist, biting your bottom lip so you wouldn’t smile.

 “Because you bother me,” Calum said smiling.

 “Well, if we’re going off of that I should just let you have your way with me,” You said making Calum laugh.

 “Don’t ever stop bothering me,” Calum said smiling.

 “I won’t. I promise,” You siad as Calum wrapped his arm around you, his hands finding their way up to the zipper.

 “Are you staying here tonight or are we going back to your room?” Calum asked as he started to pull the zipper down. You sighed and looked around his room making Calum chuckled.

 “We can stay here tonight,” You said smiling.

 “Are you going to be here when I wake up,” Calum asked as you ran your hands up his arms.

 “That I can only say one thing to,” You whispered as Calum leaned in, lightly brushing his nose against yours. “Absolutely.”

i’m going to be linking two stories together in a way so if you haven’t checked out Entourage I would do that soon. hope you liked it.