women who are better than me

Saw a dad giving his daughter advice to go to a women’s college so she’d become a “proper feminine young lady” and the flashbacks I had made me cackle so hard I thought I broke a rib

as someone who went to women’s college for a bit, women’s college is where you go to became a radical feminist fighter who will literally never put up with patriarchal bullshit ✌️

Why men think women in mass will organize to just hold on to antiquated feminine standards mostly perpetuated by men will never cease to anger me. Hell, even organizations run by nuns have been cited as hotbeds of lesbian relationships and intense feminist thoughts

ORGANIZED WOMEN DO NOT GET TOGETHER TO TALK ABOUT WAYS TO TAKE CARE OF MEN. THEY ORGANIZE TOGETHER TO TALK ABOUT WAYS TO FIGHT THE PATRIARCHY

so please go my sisters, go to women’s college, learn how to destroy all men in your life with a better education than they could ever dream of

What if he falls for another. After all, he’s thousands of miles away. There are so many women that are better than I, so what happens if he falls for another. My heart would break into a million pieces once more. I’m scared. I’m alone. He’s all I have, so what happens if he leaves me like the others.

What if she falls for another. I’ve never met another woman like her. She’s any man’s dream, she’s my dream. I’ve never gotten my heart broken but I hope she’s not the one who breaks it. I want to protect her with all I have, even if she’s thousands of miles away. If she fell for another, at least she’d be happy and at least I’d know what true love felt like.

So Tilda Swinton messages Margaret Cho out of the blue (probably looking for an “Asian friend who isn’t offended!!”) and starts whitesplaining to her about how an Asian character being changed into a white woman is “diversity,” as if white women aren’t represented in the media WAY better than Asian men and women.

And Margaret Cho is polite and civil in this awkward, out-of-the-blue conversation with this entitled white woman who is convinced she can do no wrong, but we’re supposed to hate Margaret Cho because she admits that she was really bothered by it afterwards? 

And Tilda leaks the e-mails as if this is another Kim Kardashian/Taylor Swift thing?

Literally all Tilda did was show that Margaret Cho was just tolerating you. Tilda still looks bad to me.

How is this a case of “HOMG TILDA SHOWED UP WITH RECEIPTS!” when the receipts literally tell us exactly what Margaret Cho said happened? How is Margaret Cho in the wrong for being rightfully annoyed by this?

Also why is Tilda pestering Margaret Cho and expecting HER to tell her what’s wrong with whitewashing Doctor Strange? Why can’t she do her own homework, especially when Asian actors like Ming Na Wen and George Takei have been VERY vocal about why they take issue with it?

This whole thing just rubs me the wrong way and I hate how it looks like it’s going to be spun as Margaret Cho just “looking for a fight” or whatever. 

Fucking white women, man…

we will never be satisfied - bad-ass broadway feminists who have empowered women and changed the face of musical theatre

the schuyler sisters - hamilton // i can do better than that - the last five years // it won’t be long now - in the heights // right hand man - something rotten! // watch what happens - newsies // all to pieces - violet // ring of keys - fun home // on the steps of the palace - into the woods // naughty - matilda // everything’s coming up roses - gypsy // take me or leave me - rent // don’t rain on my parade - funny girl // colored woman - memphis // lot’s wife - caroline, or change // bring it on - bring it on: the musical // before it’s over - dogfight // astonishing - little women // shall i tell you what i think of you - the king and i // get out and stay out - 9 to 5 // satisfied - hamilton // defying gravity - wicked // so much better - legally blonde //

L I S T E N

We would rather have an unqualified man who grabs, rapes, violates, bullies, and dehumanizes women as our leader than a uniquely qualified woman. What that says about a woman’s worth, about your worth, makes me so sad and frustrated that I want to angry-dance in a barn somewhere. And while I know it can’t mean much coming from me because I am biased, pretend that I am completely objective and looking at your life for the first time. You deserve so much better than this. You actively try to make the world a better place every single day, wrestling big, tangled issues like climate justice, city planning, and environmental policy. You speak up each day for people who can’t. Your default setting is to help, and you’ve carved a career out of doing it. But most importantly, you’ve done it all while negotiating a minefield of people who treat you as though a young, beautiful woman can’t be good at her job, who made you want to dye and cut your hair so that you’d be taken more seriously, who force you to ask yourself with each item of clothing you buy whether it will send a thousand unintended messages at work. I’ve never heard you complain about any of it – this all comes to me peripherally in your stories as small moments tangential to the real plot of your day. This is just the way things are.

Saying I’m proud of you is like saying I’m proud of volcanoes for making the earth I get to stand on. There isn’t a word for how I feel about you today, that’s why I’m trying to say it in 800 instead, and it still feels short. No, Hillary Clinton is not our president, and America voted for Trump in spite of (and in some cases because of) his treatment of women, but I’m writing this in some desperate attempt to make sure that you know it doesn’t define your worth. That it doesn’t define the worth of any woman or little girl who watched the states domino into the evening. I’m pretty sure you don’t believe it does, because you are smarter and more resilient than that, but I also heard you crying in the kitchen last night.

A Letter to My Wife The Day After The Election

2

“Did you know,” Mikael says to Yousef, one Friday evening, whilst they’re both lying in bed because nothing could be better than this, with the curtains shut, “that the Prophet Yusuf was given half the beauty of the entire world to him? It says in the Qur’aan that when he used to pass by women who were working, the women would end up cutting their fingers off because they couldn’t stop looking at how beautiful the Prophet Yusuf was.” 

“Aha, I knew that. Why do you think my Mum called me Yousef, huh?” Yousef chuckles, raising his eyebrow in question at Mikael, as he holds him a little more tighter, a little more closer to his body. 

Mikael doesn’t reply back immediately; he just has the ghost of a smile on his lips. He lets his eyes wander, his gaze linger, studying Yousef’s face as if for the first time. His eyes, his nose, his lips. He lets himself give in to the simple pleasure of feeling Yousef’s skin under his own, before he exhales out all the air his lungs were holding in. 

“Wallah, Yousef …” says Mikael, you’re the most beautiful boy I’ve ever seen.”

“I do it for myself” doesn’t show the whole picture.

Just because doing something makes you happier than not doing it doesn’t mean that you’re freely making that choice.  You can “do it for yourself” and still be doing it because of the patriarchy. Examples:

  • I shave my legs because I want to be soft and feminine. Not shaving my legs would make me unhappy and feel gross. I “do it for myself” but I’m doing it because our sexist society has told me since birth that being “soft and feminine” is the best way to be, and has told other people since birth that “soft and feminine” women deserve more respect than those who aren’t.
  • I wear dresses because I enjoy wearing dresses. I like how I’m treated when I wear dresses. It would make me unhappy to not wear gendered clothing. I’m still doing it because society treats feminine women better than GNC women, even though I “do it for myself.”
  • I like how I look in pink lipstick. I “do it for myself” because I do really like the look of pink lipstick, but I only like pink lipstick because it’s always been associated with feminine women. If I hadn’t been raised around gender roles, I probably never would have thought “Hm, I want to paint my lips pink!”

Women who “do things for themselves” are still victims of gender roles. Choice feminism refuses to acknowledge this, and instead of dismantling gender, they want to pretend that it doesn’t affect them. But “I do it for myself” doesn’t show the whole picture.

On a scale from 1 to 10, I wish someone would say I’m an 11.
And those numbers feel like more than just numbers.
Please tell me, who are you to give me more insecurities?
And please tell me, who are you to talk about all the different possibilities?
I’m stuck wondering how to over work myself to not be myself.
While thinking of ways to make myself something better, anything else.
I wish you knew we women are more than just our appearances and features.
I wish you knew that we can be fighters or lovers or maybe even teachers.
Bless my father, for he always told me I was priceless.
That somehow I’m worth than 1,000 diamonds and nothing less.
But when you rate me, those numbers feel like more than just numbers.
And every word you say, strips me deep into gray, away from my bright colors.
As you also strip away all the confidence that I built inside lovers.
—  Written by lexorina  © 
  • me: *loves Olicity & has hope for reunion* (✿◠‿◠)
  • random olicity-hater #3675: olishitty sucks! you're in denial! they're done! deal with it! (╬ ಠ益ಠ)
  • me: *loves Olicity even MOAR & has ALL THE HOPE for reunion x 1000000* (ノ✿◕ヮ◕)ノ*:・゚✧
4

I’ve started a series where I wanted to do modernized!Shakespeare. I don’t think its finished but these are some of my favorite characters so far. A few things:

  • The men in Midsummer Night’s Dream are so awful.. @willy shakes set the women free please…. set them free. also let the ladies date
  • [looks at my half-dozen drawing of Benvolio/Mercutio vs. my single drawing for Romeo/Juliet] What do you mean Bencutio isn’t the main couple in R&J?
  • #LetBenvolioSayFuck2k17
  • I kept the soccer thing for Viola & Duke… She’s the Man is flawed but it’s also my childhood just let me keep the soccer thing
  • I demand more genderqueer Viola
  • Shoutout to anyone who picks up on Hippolyta’s outfit i know its rly obvious but just. shoutout
  • Hero deserves so much better than Claudio. Hence, the obvious Hamilton…. In fact there’s a lot of designs clearly inspired by certain actors…..
  • One old Mercutio designs is inspired by @crystallizedtwilight which im like 90% sure their design is also inspired by certain R&J production’s character design but anyways credit to them
8

an endless list of wonderful women: emeraude toubia
“I was like maybe I’m not good. There’s a thousand girls out there who are better than me, and prettier than me. And they have more training than I do.’ This role that they gave me is a white girl, it was never meant for it to be a Latina. They did a worldwide casting. They had girls from London, from all over the world, and they chose a Latina to take the role of Isabelle Lightwood!”

social experiment, whenever someone says Beyoncé is overrated just ask them who’s out here doing it better than her

It’s just very transparent seeing people, (mostly black men and alarmingly the black women who are trying to win brownie points with these niggas), who are so uncomfortable with a black woman receiving as much praise as she does but try to make it about a lack of talent

I had a nigga tell me the other day he thinks Beyoncé is just “a regular bitch” and he wouldn’t go to her concert even if it was free. You’re ridiculous.

Story timeeee!! (The one that got away?)

I officially entered the bowl 8 months ago and within a month met an amazing guy on tinder (sn: ive used tinder since day one)! He’s a lawyer in his early 60s, very handsome, smells great, dresses impeccable, treated me better than any other guy I’ve ever been with to this day and most of all we were friends too. He was a white man who dated young thin attractive black women since his divorce. Listen ya’ll, this man took one look at me and asked if I was a “K” 😂😂😂😂. That’s how I knew he wasn’t lying about dating black women. He definitely had a type 💀.

Now he was never my SD per se as I never received an allowance and he never knew I was a SB. However, he would send me money if I expressed a need or distress, for nails or if I wanted to buy something (which I never fully took advantage of because again I was still a “newborn” in terms of sugaring. In other words, I was scared to open my damn mouth! I had not cause I asked not!) We dated like bf/gf only going to ATLs most exclusive 4.5/5 star resturants and frequenting the 4 Seasons, The W or Ritz whenever he was in town.

This man held open doors, took coats, pulled out chairs, handled valet, checked in before every date being sure that he sent me the correct address, made sure I was completely satisfied in every way even if that meant he had to talk to the chef himself (he’s done it before). He left NOTHING to interpretation. Anything a gentleman should do, he did. He was a wealthy white man and he used his privilege with authority yet humbly to make me happy. Best part yet? He never, ever invited me to his hotel room, kissed me or touched me at ALL! So much respect!

Well after a dating for a bit, he let’s me know that if I’ll have him, he’ll pay off my debt and put me in his will along with his two children (one is my EXACT age 😶). I could expect a very nice ring. He wasn’t proposing right then, but he wanted to be sure that I knew that he wanted this to go somewhere as “hes old and doesn’t have many good years left on earth” (his words). He said he didn’t want to waste time and that if I couldn’t be sure that I wanted to be married within a yr that he’d have to move on because he didn’t have as much time as I did. The thought of being married so young scared me but this is what we as SBs want right? And here it was at my feet only months after being in the bowl. I wanted him. I wanted this life for LIFE! Everything just lined up…almost.

We still hadn’t been sexual let alone kissed. That night we had the talk, I made a move. I was gonna see where things could go with us. I invited myself to his room. I kissed him, which wasn’t all that great, but whatever I wanted that will. He was grinding on me making old man sounds like he was about buss in his pants. I ignore it cause I’m trying to get a BMW convertible for Xmas. He sticks his tongue in my ear and literally, I fucking kid you not, starts making a noise that sounds like “sha la-la-la sha la sha la sha la-la-la”. Then……he grabs my face and proceeds to lick my makeup off my face with long strokes of his tongue and it feels like a cats tongue and for some reason, THAT breaks me and I realize I can’t do it lol. I just cannot. One of my eyebrows is halfway gone and my contour is erased. I can feel the spit drying on my skin. I start to rationalize things different.

Like this man just might fuck around and live for another 25 yrs. Can I deal with this for 25 yrs? I can’t have a sad pussy for 25 yrs. Can’t have an affair, that’ll cancel out the will. This is why I drink on dates! To take off the edge so stuff like this won’t bother me. I try to show him how I like to be kissed….he shhhh’s me and proceeds to suck my neck like a leech. I can’t. And I never do again. Now that I’m a bit more experienced and I’ve seen more shit, I’m thinking about calling him up 🤔🤔🤔. It would be hella nice to get out bowl.

It bothers me that some people think that it diminishes a female character’s importance in the story to posit that she won’t end up in a relationship with the male protagonist. It bothers me that some people think it boosts a female character’s importance in the story to stick her in a relationship with the male protagonist.

A thinly written female character cannot be instantly patched by handing her off like a trophy at the finish line. We deserve better than women who are important only as symbols, catalysts, or markers of development to male characters. Rejecting that trope is not internalized misogyny. It’s not good storytelling, and it’s not good feminism.

What boys say: You shouldn’t be with him, he doesn’t deserve you. I could treat you way better so you should be with me.

What girls hear: I’m a condescending asshole who feels so entitled to you that I’m completely disregarding your decision-making faculties in an assumption that I can make better decisions for a human being than they can. 

Women aren’t lost, misguided little souls looking for the right guy to set us in the right direction. We are competent humans in control of our own destiny, fully capable of making our own decisions about which people to let into our lives. 

anonymous asked:

Can you tell me why?

Sure. I’m not saying Mon-El isn’t seriously flawed, because he is. But the context of a story is an important part of the bigger picture. Mon-El isn’t just another fuckboy who doesn’t respect women and treats people like crap. He is written to be an alien from another planet, a planet whose beliefs and customs are completely and utterly different than earths. 

Does that make those customs right? Of course not. But he landed on earth, and decided that earth’s ways were better ways. He decided that the life and the world that Kara wanted to show him was worth exploring. Now has he had a few bumps along the way? Absolutely. He’s had times where he hasn’t listened to her, he’s been incredibly selfish, he’s even been possessive, he’s acted superior, or in other moments, apathetic. 

But the important thing about a  character isn’t who they start out as, it’s who they grow into and that’s what you have to base your bottom line on when giving a character description. Is this character static? Do they stay selfish, manipulative, villainous, etc? Or are they dynamic, do they change over time, grow, evolve? Mon-El has done that. Not just for Kara, but for himself. Over the past two episodes we saw him go from someone who is jealous and superior to someone who is caring, considerate and supportive. He had that talk with Winn about how to be a good boyfriend to Kara, and lately that is all he has been. He is trying, he is evolving, he is learning and he is really doing it. 

He’s lied about his status on Daxum and again, that’s a flaw. But if anything, that fear of not being good enough for Kara because of who he was, and recognizing that he was a member of royalty on a planet that so obviously had misyogynistic and awful values towards women and people in general? That’s growth. That’s him understanding that Daxum’s ways aren’t the right ways and wanting to put that behind him and not be looked down upon for it. Is lying to Kara right? No. But it’s also ironically human

Mon-El is flawed. But that doesn’t make him a cloaked villain of some kind. He is evolving, and he is a dynamic individual, you just have to give him time. And you have to understand the context of the situation. If you aren’t seeing that, than you are not looking at the bigger picture, you are watching through shipper eyes. And if thats how you want to watch a show, that’s fine, but calling out things like “abusive”  is walking a dangerous line. 

To me, Mon-El is one of the most crystal clear dynamic characters on TV right now. I mean his growth and development as a character are textbook . If I had a literature class where I had to choose a character from media and describe the term “dynamic”? I would use Mon-El as my example. 

Oh, and none of it has to do with him being pretty (but damn, he sure is pretty). If I bought into that I would be the leader of Team Damon on TVD and I can’t stand that guy. 

anonymous asked:

Why do you identify as bisexual rather than pansexual? For me pansexual better expresses that I am attracted to people, no matter their gender and is more inclusive of intersex and non-binary people. Bisexual to me reiforces the idea that only men and women deserve being identified in sexual terms, and anyone who falls outside this isnt even worth counting. Which I dont like. So yea I go for pan sexual. But thats just my interprtation. Id be interested in hearing yours?

Bi means two or more, not just men and women. I personally cannot imagine gender being a barrier, but there is a lot of overlap between bi and pan and the decisions people usually choose one identity over the other are personal.

For me it’s about how hard I fought to BE bisexual. To get out of the closet and not be forced back in, to not invalidate the relationships I had with women because I felt forced to choose either “lesbian” or “straight” when neither identity fit me.

What if he falls for another. After all, he’s thousands of miles away. There are so many women that are better than I, so what happens if he falls for another. My heart would break into a million pieces once more. I’m scared. I’m alone. He’s all I have, so what happens if he leaves me like the others.

What if she falls for another. I’ve never met another woman like her. She’s any man’s dream, she’s my dream. I’ve never gotten my heart broken but I hope she’s not the one who breaks it. I want to protect her with all I have, even if she’s thousands of miles away. If she fell for another, at least she’d be happy and at least I’d know what true love felt like.

—  Late Night Thoughts #8
via littlemisssimaginary
in which I reply to asks

I have received so many lovely/generous/capslocked asks and messages about the CP bachelor AU, mostly from anons, and rather than filling up everyone’s dash with individual replies I thought I’d do some…paraphrasing.

JOKASTE IS SO GREAT
YES. YES SHE IS. WELL DONE TO ALL OF YOU ANONS WITH EXCELLENT TASTE. I was pleased with the glimpses of jokaste we got in the books but I will seize any excuse to write her myself, as part of my ongoing fight for more ruthless, charming, ambitious masterminds who are women. and I love the idea that under other circumstances she and laurent might have been cautious and terrifying allies, if their interests ever aligned.

I had a dream about this AU!
literally two separate anons have told me this and I think this is amazing. your dreams probably have better plot twists than the actual story. especially the one where damen had to learn japanese for Nebulous Reality TV Reasons. more power to you, collective fandom subconscious.

BUT AIMERIC
look, this is a small lifeboat and I can’t save everyone, and my primary interest in every AU I write is keeping nicaise alive so that he and laurent can be snarky BFFs. and aimeric is just so much more useful if you keep his traitorous aspects intact. don’t worry, laurent is gonna have a minor existential moment about this in the next scene. 

oh boy I can’t wait for them to bone down
me neither. me. neither. I don’t know how porny this fic is going to get but rest assured there will be at LEAST some serious kissing.

ok so…damen has a man bun?
yes. it’s super hot. he looks like that guy you run into in woolworths who has clearly just been to the gym and is now shopping for greek yoghurt and could probably bench press your entire weight, and you get so distracted by his arms and his dimples and the little dark wisps of escaping hair in the nape of his neck that you accidentally end up with a trolley full of frozen peas and none of the yoghurt you, personally, were meant to be picking up.

that is a very specific scenario
yes, it is definitely Fiction and in no way based on a real experience.

but what is LAURENT’S hair doing in this universe?
his hair is full of secrets, obviously.

fahye are you just making up questions now
maybe.

C: I honestly believe that if I were at least 50 pounds lighter my life would be better. Most of my personal problems as far as making friends, speaking up in class, collaborating with my peers, wearing certain things as I see come from a lack of confidence. That lack of confidence is a result of my weight and I am in the process of losing weight. I just wish I could be more confident during my journey. I see girls who weigh a bit more than me have so much confidence and slay. I want that.