women for justice

10

The Muslim community is mourning the passing of Nabra, a 17 year old young woman from Sterling, VA. Nabra was beaten to death with a baseball bat and left in a pond after going missing while walking to a mosque with her friends. Hate crime against Muslim Americans is at its highest point with more than 67% increase since 2016. Nabra is another example of the escalating violence towards Muslims Americans. Activists gathered at Union Square to hold a vigil for Nabra and her family and to stand against violence against Muslim Americans. 

DO NOT FOLLOW ME IF YOUR FEMINISM DOESN'T INCLUDE:

• Trans women
• Trans men
• Intersex people
• The LGBTQ community
• Queer people of colour
• People with disabilities
• Autistic and neurodivergent people
• Sex workers
• Immigrants
• Women of colour
• People with mental illness
• The Black Lives Matter movement
• The poor and homeless
• Male advocacy
• Sexual assault survivors (men and women)
• Muslim women (with or without the hijab)
• Jewish women
• Sikh women
• Mothers

For cishet black men 4:44 was a Godsend. For the rest of the black population, however, 4:44 a curse. Almost immediately, a man who presented himself as feminist and activist posted a tweet thread about the pain and restrictions black men experience growing up, and how black women needed to be patient with black men who are still learning. When multiple black women responded that black women grow up under the same conditions with equal or greater constraints on emotional display, he gaslit and dismissed them. This is exactly what I feared. This is The 4:44 Effect in action, cishet black men sobbing about the emotional/empathic growing pains while expecting grace that was never afforded to black women. All the while, these same black men continue to “learn” by harming and discarding black women. They continue to learn by ostracizing queer black men, but then want easy access to the emotional spaces queer black men were beaten for entering. Cishet black men want the applause for finally gaining emotional depth that the rest of the black community had to develop as children for our safety and their comfort. The 4:44 Effect, I fear, will be particularly toxic in spaces once considered safe for black women. Cishet black male allies can can now dodge accountability under the guise of “still learning”. They can berate black women for not being impressed or wooed by their juvenile grasp on emotional intelligence. They can berate queer black people for not graciously allowing their casual queerantagonism because that’s “how I was raised.” The bar wasn’t raised, it was just repainted. Jay-Z and the other men in the Footnotes, in all their blissful enlightened ignorance, don’t realize the pandora’s box they’ve opened on the people they claim to now care about.
—  The 4:44 Effect  by Saki Benibo (@mrbenibo)