womanly-issues

She’s Dying!

Based off of this imagine from imaginexhobbit

Words: 641


               Periods sucked.

               That was the conclusion that you came to every time you got a visit from Aunt Flow, as you so lovingly called your monthly cycle. Over the past few days, you’d been assaulted with cramps so bad that all you wanted to do was curl up in a ball on the ground. But, of course, you couldn’t do that. You, thirteen dwarves, a wizard, and a hobbit were on a quest to reclaim the kingdom of Erebor. At the moment, however, the rest of the Company was setting up camp for the night. You’d told everyone that you weren’t feeling well and laid down on your bedroll, your blanket wrapped around you like a cocoon. You hadn’t told anyone of your “condition”—why bother? Discussing womanly issues such as this would just make your male companions uncomfortable.

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Son of a whore....

So, I’ve got mah puriod, right? Had it last month on the thirteenth, got it this month on the twelfth. So, I’ll get it this time next month.

The problem? I’m going to Chicago next month on the thirteenth! Fuck me three ways, I do not want to have to deal with that! Geez…is there any way to make it not happen? Just for that one month, then I’ll go back to normal?