womanhood

i’ve been working 3+ years in a job during which i’ve seen hundreds of women’s bodies in a medical context

lemme tell you a thing

women are fucking hairy, ok? i’ve seen women covered with hair from their ankles to their armpits. women with super visible pubic hair that approaches their bellybuttons, regardless of race/ethnicity. we have hair absolutely everywhere and our public image as women is totally devoid of this reality. 

men really have no idea how hard women have to work to make ourselves hairless. it’s as unnatural for us as it is for them but this is something that doesn’t even cross their minds as they emerge from their caves looking like unwashed wookies not even aware of how much they’re just allowed to exist.

You’ve got to know yourself. You’ve got to know what ignites your magic, what fires your soul into performing majestic acts of love. You’ve got to know yourself so much that not even a hundred voices will drown yours. You’ve got to own yourself, this journey is all yours. All yours. No one can do it and you decide whenever you are ready to embark on it. Unlearn, learn, master yourself and love yourself or else they will define you and that’s a poisonous kind of life. That’s death.
Imagine, if you will, that an organization existed by the name of “Womanhood Speaks”, which, on the surface, appeared to be in support of women’s rights. Now imagine that the governing body of this organization only included members of the male gender, with not one female represented in its ranks. Imagine that its actual aim was to create a registry for all females and force them to become more masculine, completely disregarding the fact that a majority of females were perfectly content with their womanhood and even found it to be advantageous. Imagine that members of its leadership appeared on popular TV programs talking about the epidemic of womanhood and how it needed to be eradicated. Doesn’t sound too appealing, does it?
— 

Cody Boisclair, An Autistic Speaks about Autism Speaks

This is EXACTLY how Autism Speaks horribly misrepresents people with autism. Autism is not tragic. It’s not a disease that should be ridden of. Let us speak for you. We want acceptance, not awareness.

HOW TO BE A GIRL

1. Be delicate, but not stuck up. Be graceful, but don’t be conceited. Be sexy, but not sexual. Be smart, but don’t be witty. Have an opinion, but don’t speak your mind.

2. Take up as little space as possible.

3. Don’t be like the other girls.

4. But don’t be too different either.

5. Take care of your body. Not by weekends at the spa, evenings in your tub with useless, stupid bath bombs, sweet treats,  a walk in the park or, god forbid, masturbation, no, taking care of your body means making sure you stay in shape to look as appealing as possible. Go to the gym whenever you can, stick to that diet, ignore your hunger, you have to be slim, you have to be skinny. Not too skinny, though. So make sure your body stores fat in places where it’s considered attractive: Your breasts, your ass. No cellulite. No flab. No dimples. No stretch marks. No body hair. If you let it grow, you let yourself go.

6. It’s self-understood, but of course, you have to have a vagina.

7. Remember that every other girl you meet is your rival. There is no such thing as true friendship between girls. In the end, she is going to disappoint and backstab you anyway. That’s just what girls are like. So be ahead of her at all times. Be prettier than her, more succesful than her, thinner than her, just better than her. Being a girl means being in a constant competition with every other female being.

8. In terms of sex; give, don’t take. Don’t ask foor too much.

9. If he hurts you, it is your fault. Always keep in mind that falling for a liar and a cheater is a sign of your own weakness, because you were blinded by the dumb, immature illusion of true love that girls are so fond of. If you want to be a good girl, you have to lower your expectations of men and settle for less than what you actually dreamed of. That’s just how it is. You should be thankful for every man that is interested in you anyway. So don’t mourn and don’t complain if one of them lets you down, not all men are like that, and your own stupidity is to blame, not his inability to refrain from giving in to his desire for another girl. If you would’ve been better, he wouldn’t have left you in first place.

10. Deny your human nature for it is inappropriate for girls to openly express their basic needs, such as hunger, arousal, or the simple need to burp, fart, piss, shit. That’s a boy thing, it’s funny if they do it, but gross and repulsive if girls do.

11. Be in control, but never take control.

12. Don’t even try to convince anyone you’re dressing up like that for yourself. It’s okay, darling, you want to be stared at, you want to be whistled at. Deep down inside, you need that kind of affirmation and acknowledgement, so take it as a compliment when someone yells that he wants to fuck you. If they take it too far, if they grab and molest you, well, maybe you should’ve thought about that before you put on that skimpy dress, you dirty little slut. Because even if you think you’re dressing up for yourself, even if you think you’re putting on makeup because it makes you happy, it’s wrong. As a girl, there’s only few things that you do for yourself, because it should be one of your main priorities in life to serve, just as girls always did, and always will.

13. Last but not least; yes, it’s supposed to hurt. So better get used to it.

—  What Society Taught Me - An ironical take on the unwritten rules we’re supposed to follow

As females, we are, from birth, so cut off from the experience of being fully human that we often feel our own lives are inauthentic. And so, for at least partly this reason, we reject any definition of womanhood that is centered on a feeling of innate “authenticity.” Anyone living life as a female knows that there is no such feeling upon which to rest the identity of “woman.”

There’s an interesting symmetry in the way that early feminist responses to trans women were anxieties that we were trying to replace cis women or were innovating/redefining womanhood, and the fact that so much of trans mens discourse is abt redefining masculinity/maleness/‘creating a new way to be a man’

Like imagine if trans women were like “we’re here to create a new and healthier image of womanhood” lol