wizarding personalities

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wizard world philly 2017: Forsythe Pendleton Jones III 🍔👑🐍

  • crown: handmade
  • south side serpents jacket: base jacket from primark with handmade patches
  • ringer tee: h&m
  • pins: @maccosmetics x @archiecomics
  • burger purse: amazon
  • black denim skirt: american apparel
  • plaid shirt: borrowed from @jordangibson
  • suspenders: century 21
  • black tights: forever 21
  • ankle boots: forever 21

[instagram: bettyfelon]

*sees a skinny Taako*

My BOI mY Boi There he is goddAMn MY B O I. T HA T  IS  H Im ThERe.

*sees a chubby Taako*

My BOI mY Boi There he is goddAMn MY B O I. T HA T  IS H Im ThERe.

*sees a green/white/brown/gray/purple Taako*

My BOI mY Boi There he is goddAMn MY B O I. T HA T  IS H Im ThERe.

*fashionable Taako/fashion disaster Taako*

My BOI mY Boi There he is goddAMn MY B O I. T HA T  IS H Im ThERe. 


Just T A A K O.

Getting Away With Kidnapping

Context: So after a lengthy discussion, our DM ruled that if a target is charmed, and the charmed effect is ended via the charmed target being attacked, that as long as an Enchantment Wizard was the one who charmed the target, the Enchantment Wizard can include the target forgetting who just attacked them when they use Alter Memories.

Bard: *fails Persuasion check*

Paladin: *fails Intimidate check*

NPC: No! I’m not guiding you all anywhere, and that’s final!

Party (OOC): Well shit. What do we do now?

Wizard (OOC): Guys, I have a plan. Just follow my lead. I cast Charm Person

NPC: Proceeds to guide party where they need to go while charmed.

Party: Proceeds to kill bandits they were after.

Wizard (OOC): Alright guys. Here’s part two of my plan. I whap the NPC with my quarterstaff.

DM: You have successfully whapped the NPC. Your Charm Person ends

Wizard (OOC): So how long has he been with us?

DM: Including when you first found him in town, up till now… 3 hours.

Wizard (OOC): Awesome! I use Alter Memories to make him forget the past 3 hours, including me just whapping him in the head.

DM: And he fails his save. Alright, you all now have a very confused NPC in front of you who doesn’t know who you are, where he is, or why his head hurts. What do you do?

Wizard: Excuse me sir. Are you alright?

Bard: (28 Deception) It seems these men kidnapped you. Looks like you took a pretty good blow to the head. Do you remember anything?

NPC: By the gods! Oh no! These men where my business partners! How did this happen? Why would they do this to me? Thank you so much for saving me!

BTS Masterlist

REQUESTS ARE CLOSED

Originally posted by sugataecups

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anonymous asked:

I feel like the Gravebone fandom is not taking enough advantage of historically accurate men's underwear. Where are the union suits with the "Kenosha-Klosed-Krotch" like in the Leyendecker ads? Where are the sock garters and hole-proof hosiery? The B.V.D.s? The underwear with buttons in the front and tie strings on the back or side to adjust for fit (WWI military style)? Fandom needs to up its game.

It’s a challenge to truly describe the beauty that is early 20th century men’s undergarments in fanfiction as we, the writers and the readers, usually want to get to the good juicy bits of heated gazes and lingering touches and breaths that are both quickened and slowed and stopped all together, rather than begin a deluge of descriptions in an attempt to capture the most sensual and accurate way to untangle a man’s girth and naked form from his layers of cotton that most of us are unfamiliar with historically as well as in practical terms. 

(And my guess is the magical world in the US probably had their own types of underwear, seeing as they had their own fashion styles, which differed from no-maj society.)

That said, I did go a googling for a little bit and found some lovely pictures that I will now place here–under the cut–because of reasons that are valid and have nothing to do with wanting to see Colin Farrell in garters and full body tighty whities. (Also this is a little informative article on the history of men’s underwear that I found pretty interesting to read.)

Keep reading

Context: My players are fighting a phantom thief whose body consists entirely of a red coat and top hat.

Me: [Wizard], what are you gonna do?

Wizard: Charm person!

Me: …Okay.

Me: (rolls a 5 on the saving throw) That almost certainly fails. Hmm.

Druid: OH MY GOD. He’s done it. He’s charmed a jacket.

Wizard: SEX FIXES EVERYTHING!

Monk (in character): [Wizard], you’re gonna catch, like, a mystical STD or something.

jet-playin  asked:

Hi! Do you know of any fics where Harry and Draco are both Aurors and have to work together? I've read quite a few but haven't come across one in a while. Either permanently partners or firced together for a single case, both work for me. (Note: I have read everything by l0vegl0wsinthedark so, much as I love reading and rereading What Real Thing, I figured it would better to warn you :D Thank you so much for all of your recs, they are so, unspeakably helpful! :)

(Thank you @celticrose1989​ and @awesomesauceuniverse​ for the requests!! I decided to combine these, since fics in which only Draco is an auror/cursebreaker are pretty rare. I was planning to also combine this with a request for just Auror!Harry (with miscellaneous Draco) to make a giant Auror Drarry list, but it ended up being ridiculously long, so that one will come later this weekend! This one is already super long as-is, so I’ve tried to limit my commentary to 2-3 lines. Let it be known that it was very difficult, hahaha.)

Auror/Cursebreaker Partner Drarry Recs

What Real Thing? by loveglowsinthedark / @l0vegl0wsinthedark (13K)- They don’t cuddle, they don’t talk about their relationship (or lack thereof) and they certainly never fall asleep in each other’s arms.
I know you’ve already read it, but you can’t expect me to just not include this amazing sexy pining fluffy piece of wonderfulness in my auror rec list!!! It includes the BEST AIRPORT SCENE (not at an airport) EVER.

Higher and Higher (Temptation) by birdsofshore (28.5K)- Only Harry Potter could manage to put on a magical collar on impulse and find himself unable to take it off again. Now following Draco’s direct orders gives him intense pleasure, and Draco has a whole heap of troubles to deal with, not least the way Potter looks when the collar has him gasping with bliss. The whole situation would test the morals of a saint… and Draco’s no saint.
THIS FIC!! EVERYTHING I EVER WANTED. I STILL REMEMBER CLICKING ON IT AND NEARLY ORGASMING RIGHT THERE and it totally does its description justice! Technically Draco is a cursebreaker here.

Two Weeks by shiftylinguini / @shiftylinguini (22K)- If Harry had to guess which out of he or his Auror Partner, and tentative new friend, Draco Malfoy, would turn out to have Veela ancestry, his answer would be: neither, because that is ridiculous. Finding out the answer is actually him, and that his Veela heritage is wreaking havoc on his ability to work, sleep, and above all be in the same room as Malfoy, is a surprise to say the least. But this is fine. Harry’s been through worse, and he can just sit this one out, regardless of how much his body is screaming for the one person he doesn’t want to ask for help. Can’t he?
WONDERFUL FABULOUS YES TIMES 96382!! Veela!Harry but like, read it even if that’s not usually your thing. GREAT pining!!! Phone sex. P H O N E S E X.

Lift Your Open Hand by firethesound / @firethesound (19K)- With Draco Malfoy as his assigned partner for the next six weeks of Auror training, Harry had been prepared for things to go poorly. But getting themselves accidentally bonded to each other in the first twenty minutes of their very first assignment seemed going above and beyond, even for them.
What could you possibly need that isn’t in this fic? Includes bonding, domesticity, bed sharing, and Nicolas Cage. Perfection <3

Sex on Legs in Six-Inch Heels by tessacrowley / @tessacrowley (10K)- Draco Malfoy is a brilliant freelance cursebreaker and the only one who can help the Department of Magical Law Enforcement with a very dangerous case, but more importantly, he’s wearing six-inch heels, and Harry cannot handle it, he really just can’t.
One of the first fics I read and STILL one of the hottest! The sex is amazing, as is the fact that Draco wears (surprisingly practical!) heels and women’s clothing in general I LOVE IT SO MUCH

Highlands by Seefin / @seefin (16K)- The tent was a joke, that was basically the only explanation he could come up with as to why the Aurors would send he and Draco on a several-month mission with only their most basic model. Once, when Harry had been on one of the big ones, the kind of mission where there was a little Auror camp out in the wilderness, twenty or so tents all pitched practically on top of each other, he had slept in one with two stories. Actually it was more of a mezzanine level, but still. Their current one didn’t even have a fucking toilet. And if Harry were allowed to communicate with anyone other than Draco then he would definitely be lodging an official complaint right about now.
This fic is so sweet and slow (despite being only 16K, idk how she does it!). I love the development of their relationship, and being forced into close quarters is especially w o n d e r f u l.

Little Talks by femmequixotic and noeon / @femmequixotic and @noeeon (11.5K)- Draco’s been shagging the Head Auror for months now, and he’s sure it’s just a fling. Until Harry asks him to a Quidditch match, that is, and things go horribly wrong.
AAAH THE SEX. Also the adorableness! And the whatthefuckishappening a real DATE??? But THE SEX! And the fluff! Sorry I’m incoherent, just READ IT!

Something More by thusspakekate (9K)- After a night of heavy drinking, Harry Potter has a love bite the size of Wales on his neck and an unsigned note from the man who gave it to him in his pocket. The only problem? He can’t quite remember who he brought home with him the night before. And what’s got Draco Malfoy in such a strop?
OMG pining in this one like crazy. It’s obvious why from the summary, right?? Yeah? Just….you’re already feeling the angst, I know it, just read it and let it be resolved <3

One Big Misunderstanding by agentmoppet / @agentmoppet (7K)- Draco will be the first to admit that his choices aren’t particularly clever, especially when they involve Potter, but this has to be the worst one yet.
OH, DRACO. Poor baby sends Harry and Blaise off on a date together and then becomes a jealous wreck and it’s beautiful.

You Send Me (Honest You Do) by firethesound (37K)- As far as potion accidents go in general, and deaging incidents go in particular, Draco knew this could have been so much worse. Harry only lost about ten years, and all his memories are still intact. But the sight of him looking as if he’s stepped straight out of Draco’s Hogwarts memories has dredged up a whole mess of complicated feelings Draco thought he’d buried years ago, and Draco really doesn’t know what to do with any of it.
This is a GREAT use of the deaging trope (without being at all creepy btw, so don’t worry!), and Harry has tattoooooos!! Also more pining pining pining <3 And great writing as always from this amazing author.

Tales from the Special Branch Series by femmequixotic (304K so far)- When Gavin Robards asks him to form Special Branch seven-four-alpha, Harry Potter knows they’ll have to work outside the confines of the law–even though they are the law.
Are you tired of me reccing this series yet? TOO BAD I’LL NEVER STOP MUAHAHA. This list just wouldn’t be complete without it! Who could ever tire of Draco fucking Harry, his senior officer???? NOT ME!!

All Our Secrets Laid Bare by firethesound (150K)- Over the six years Draco Malfoy has been an Auror, four of his partners have turned up dead. Harry Potter is assigned as his newest partner to investigate just what is going on.
Another fic I’ve recced over and over because IT’S THE QUINTESSENTIAL BEST EVER CLASSIC AUROR PARTNER FIC IN MY OPINION so it literally cannot be missing from this list.

It’s the Love of the Chase (That Created the Ride) by lumosed_quill (14K)- Draco and Harry are new Auror partners. It’s a bit dull. Until they finally see some spell action and things get a lot more interesting (in Draco’s pants).
Basically adrenalin rushes from cases make Harry and Draco crave sex and it’s amazing 

One Harry Potter Please (If Possible, Seduced and Ready) by faithwood (62K)- All Draco wants is Harry Potter’s friendship, just to make his new Auror job more bearable. However, after Harry stubbornly pays more attention to his secret admirer, Draco is forced to resort to drastic measures.
So nearly all long-term-auror-partner fics have flangst because how could they not?? But this one stands out to me as being the FLANGSTIEST (this is a word now) EVER. Like an adorable idiot, Draco impersonates Harry’s secret admirer.

The Kaleidoscope Charm, or 50 Shades of Rainbow Magic by Omi_Ohmy (27K)- Getting Draco Malfoy as a boss was not the worst thing that happened to Harry; getting a crush on him was.
Auror!Harry is assigned to work with Draco (of the Curse and Lock Breaking Dept). Also he owns a giant angel statue that looks just like him. ;D

Like Diamonds We Are Cut With Our Own Dust by raitala (11K)- Draco has borne the mark of the Dark Lord for over ten years. It is familiar to him, but he pays the price for it every day, and Harry has noticed.
This fic is just so cool. It’s based on “that picture” by alekina, which I coincidentally reblogged just yesterday and is amazing and HARRY REMOVES DRACO’S DARK MARK YEP

Whoo Knew? by oceaxe (19K)- Despite having had a crush on his Auror partner for years, Draco’s been biding his time and waiting for the perfect opportunity to make his case. But when Harry subscribes to a new wizarding personals service, Draco gets a wake-up call. With new each message that arrives for Harry from a hopeful suitor, it becomes more and more clear that the time to act has arrived.
MORE AUROR PARTNERS BEING RIDICULOUS PINING IDIOTS UNABLE TO COMMUNICATE, BUT THEY DO IT ALL SO CUTELY. And with owls this time!!