wives are for cooking

exo as dads
  • junmyeon: the rich dad who buys you everything that you want and gives you credit card when you turn 14 years old
  • minseok: the dad who looks younger than you
  • jongin: the dad who loves dogs more than he loves you
  • yixing: the cool dad who calls you bro instead of son. what
  • kyungsoo: the dad who understands men should help wives and cooks for his family everyday
  • tao: the dad who takes you to school with expensive cars making all you friends go wtf
  • baekhyun: the annoying dad
  • chanyeol: the dad who uploads pictures of you everyday as you grow up on facebook with cheesy captions
  • jongdae: the dad who sings his way through life and makes you do that parents sing love is an open door video with him in his car
  • sehun: sehun is a child. a young son. he cannot be a dad.
At the age of 20.
  • [{ Everyone is living with their lover and the husbands are talking while having a drinks... then their conversation went to their wives.}]
  • Kagami: Lately, I've seen Kuroko studying how to cook and bake.
  • Aomine: Ouu? How nice, Kagami.
  • Kagami: There's sarcasm along those lines.
  • Akashi: But my Kouki hasn't even moved an inch ever since he burned down the house.
  • Aomine & Kagami: Oi! This is the first time I heard such a thing!
  • Midorima: It happened a few months back after they finally settled in a single apartment. Apparently, that chihuahua burned down the house when he tried to cooked for Akashi.
  • Akashi: Ever since that day happened, he never step in to the kitchen.
  • Aomine: Who's the husband again?
  • Kagami: Isn't this great? We're talking about our wives.
  • Midorima: Uh...
  • Aomine: Midorima hasn't even talked about his wife, same goes to you both.
  • Murasakibara: Eh? But I tried to speak. I can't join in.
  • Hyuuga: At least stop munching your snacks for once.
  • Kagami: Oh yeah, capta- I mean, Hyuuga-senpai, you are married to coach, right?
  • Hyuuga: What did I told you about calling us captain and coach? BaKagami, we're already 20 plus and we're done with basketball. Call me Hyuuga and yeah, I'm married with her.
  • Aomine: Is she the girl in the bench back in Seirin?
  • Hyuuga: Yeah, the evil witch you guys been seeing along with us.
  • Murasakibara: Evil witch?
  • Akashi: She has a scary aura than me, Atsushi.
  • Murasakibara: Scary...
  • Kagami: How's things going though? Who's in charge of cooking both lunch and dinner?
  • Hyuuga: Me. I stopped her even before she can step inside of the kitchen.
  • Aomine: Oh, a bad cooker like Satsuki, huh?
  • Hyuuga: I bet she's even worst than Momoi-san. She can make a curry though the taste is unbelievable.
  • Akashi: Unbelievably good?
  • Kagami: No, the worst than good, Akashi. It's like you are going to die once you eaten one of her dish.
  • Aomine: You've tasted it before?
  • Kagami: She used to cook for us in our training camps and she even bought us bento.
  • Hyuuga: The face that Kuroko made when he ate one of her bento.
  • Aomine: She's no good. But Kise is the worst, though. He burned the egg all the time so we don't have a choice but to eat outside or order.
  • Kagami: Saying stuff like that... Kuroko is not the worst yet he can be the worst. You see, that guy only knows how to boil eggs.
  • Akashi: I'm not going to complain about how my Kouki does in the kitchen since you guys knew it already.
  • Murasakibara: Muro-chin is no bad. He can't cook but he can't even bake as well.
  • Midorima: You two will be fat in no time. Takao is nowhere good. He can't even boil water for our miso ramen.
  • Hyuuga: Though, I feel bad for Aomine.
  • Aomine: Right, the both of us aren't that good when it comes to cooking.
  • Kagami: I decided to cook for the both of us but you can't possibly resist how Kuroko look when he wants to cook.
  • Akashi: Same goes to me.
  • Murasakibara: Muro-chin never complains about the food I baked.
  • Midorima: He likes to spoil you too much and love you way too much.
  • Everyone: .... This is the world we chose anyway.
  • ----
  • In another cafe...
  • Kise: You see, Aominecchi decided the both of us to eat outside instead of cooking for each other. Since I have work every single day, he never broke his promise to eat together.
  • Kuroko: Kagami-kun banned me for stepping in the kitchen, though.
  • Furihata: I actually want to learn how to cook properly. Not burning the house down.
  • Takao: Hahaha! I feel so normal with you guys!
  • Himuro: Is this some kind of meeting for our husbands?
  • Everyone: Yes...
  • Himuro: I see. Well, since you guys are complaining about that. More likely, Kise is not complaining, shall we all enter a cooking school?
  • Kuroko: I'm up for that.
  • Furihata: Sei-kun wouldn't be happy about that.
  • Himuro: Why is that?
  • Furihata: He doesn't want to lessen our time together, though.
  • Himuro: You are far too spoiled. Atsushi would surely like this idea, anyway.
  • Everyone: Same goes to you, though.
10

Sansa knew most of the hymns, and followed along on those she did not know as best she could. She sang along with grizzled old serving men and anxious young wives, with serving girls and soldiers, cooks and falconers, knights and knaves, squires and spit boys and nursing mothers. She sang with those inside the castle walls and those without, sang with all the city.

Has anyone else noticed?

So I slept in the caravan/trailer near hammerhead and the scene was hilarious. So Prompto went to go check it out and calls Noct and Ignis over. Noctis stops because gladious calls him over. I’m sitting on my couch thinking “ oh look the wives are cooking for their husbands and gladious and Noctis are probably talking about fishing and fighting and prompto and Ignis are probably talking about photography and cooking and how good each others skills are’. GUYS prompto and Ignis were admiring the kitchen while gladious and noctis are out side of the trailer/caravan sitting at the table. Help these poor children.

Exo as Dads
  • Junmyeon: The rich dad who buys you everything that you want and gives you a credit card when you turn 14 years old
  • Minseok: The dad who looks younger than you
  • Jongin: The dad who loves dogs more than he loves you
  • Yixing: The dad who forgets that you're his child
  • Kyungsoo: The dad who understands men should help wives and cooks for his family everyday
  • Tao: The dad who takes you to school with expensive cars making all your friends go wtf
  • Baekhyun: The annoying dad
  • Chanyeol: The dad who uploads pictures of you everyday as you grow up on facebook with cheesy captions
  • Jongdae: The dad who sings his way through life and makes you sing that love is an open door video with him in his car
  • Sehun: Sehun is a child. A young son. He cannot be a dad.
Similarities
  • Goku: So, we both love food, and we're technically the best!
  • APH America: Of course! But--
  • Kitchen: *Horrifying explosions*
  • APH America: I think we have something else in common...
  • Goku: Really?
  • Vegeta and APH England: *sCREECHING AND RUNNING OUT OF THE KITCHEN WHICH IS NOW IN F L AMES*
  • APH America: Our wives fucking suck at cooking.
  • Goku: O shit u rite

I am so unbelievably tired of men who refuse to take care of themselves, and laugh it off like it’s cute when they justify it. “You’re just so much better at it than I am!” That’s because I fucking have to pick up your slack, and take care of my own shit too. It’s not cute that men can be so infantile that they treat their girlfriends/wives/partners like their mothers who need to clean up after them, and cook, and clean, and make sure that nothing falls apart.

And then, the fucking audacity that they get annoyed or angry if they’re asked to help clean or cook a meal or even take out trash. I am so sick of grown men throwing temper tantrums just because the women in their lives are so, so tired of having to take care of them.

anonymous asked:

Well Daddy, I'm a good cook and I'm pretty good with a gun. And thank you for saying I'm good at sucking your cock...I love too please you. (I'm the one who did the wife wanting to know if she could help out)

I’ll give credit where it’s fuckin’ due, and it’s definitely do with how well you play a fuckin’ skin flute. Too many of the wives try to go for that fuckin’ cooking gig. If you’re as good with a goddamn gun as you say you are, then that’s what I want you fuckin’ workin’ with. - Negan

Originally posted by negandarylsatisfaction

When I married Lupita, I discovered that she was a terrible cook. She either burnt the food or served it raw. So I had only a kiss for breakfast before going at work. I became thiner and thiner, and our dog, who got all the wasted food, became fatter. But thanks to the prayers to Saint Paschal Baylon, my Lupita finally learned to cook, and now I eat well. I thank for that.

I can’t even with people. Just turn on the tv and you’ll see nearly all commercials for cleaning supplies and household chores that aren’t male coded (i.e. NOT plumbing or mowing) feature women smiling and using them. You’ll see sitcoms where wives are cooking and cleaning and men are trying their damnedest to get out of pitching in at all or are hopelessly inept at all of it or don’t even have to worry about helping out. Not too uncommonly, you’ll hear men, especially older, more old fashioned men, mentioning how a woman being able to cook well or do things around the house factors in to whether or not he’d ever get serious about her. 

More often, the fact men are just expected to be totally clueless when it comes to cooking and cleaning, and it’s totally socially accepted that a bachelor live off of cup of noodles and not be able to keep up basic hygiene and cleanliness until a women walks in his life. But yeah, you solely, as one female individual being lazy about chores, totally negates all social expectations women, especially wives and mothers, face around domestic labor. Yes! The rest of us are totally off the hook and not impacted by these norms at all just because you happen to not clean up after yourself.

Now I understand why people get married. Once you’re married you can kiss as much as you like. I wonder why married people don’t spend more time at it. I wonder how married men go off to work every morning, when they could stay home and kiss their wives. I wonder how married women set about cooking meals and supervising the servants when they must be thinking of the hour when their husbands will come home and kiss them.

And I wonder about the whole history of the world. Governments and courtrooms and steam engines and combines – all necessary inventions, but how did men come up with them, when they could have been kissing? I think about the conquistadors and how they left off kissing their wives and went sailing across the ocean to conquer a lot of innocent natives who would probably have preferred to stay in their hammocks and kiss their wives. It’s hard to fathom.

—  The Hired Girl by Laura Amy Schlitz

My daughter Dora was a horrible cook. She was always burning the food, and I was afraid that she wouldn’t find a husband. I asked St. Paschal for help, and he, knowing in his infinite wisdom that Dora is a hard case, worked out so that she married a chef. She turned out to be a perfect wife for him because she never meddles with cooking, like other women do, and she always admires his dishes. I thank St. Paschal, the patron of the cooks.

  • brendon: 'i thought wives cooked' wow what a terribly sexist thing to say
  • me: yesssssss b*tch....... subvert those gender roles...... feel the unfairness of the patriarchy yessss keep goin!!! dig deeper!!!!! b*tch come on!!!! you're almost there!!!!
(Not) Home (not) alone (vol.2)

It had been two weeks since Skye and Michael had met in the deep dark cabin in the woods. Internet connection was working, so everything was fine. Sometimes they’d get calls by Fitz and Simmons, rarely by Mack or Bobbi, and they knew the others were fine.

Being roommates was going just well, since Skye was laying on the couch watching “Perfect lives of Imperfect Wives” on television as Michael was cooking lunch. “Look, look she’s gonna kill him, she will I am one hundred percent sure” Skye was telling Michael and the whole house. And even if Michael didn’t seem very interested she kept talking louder than the television. The only time she shut up was when the protagonists, husband and wife, were going in bed together.

She grunted as a videocall ringed in their ears, unwilling to go pick it up.

youcancallmemindtrap

For the short time I’ve been on tumblr all I see is post about brown guys not being able to take care of themselfs without their wives or mothers, like nahhhh? I’m Indian, I’m brown and I cook my own food, I clean the house when needed, I help my mum in the kitchen, I survive from what my mother has taught me yes but I’m independent because of what she has taught me, it’s not about these “brown guys” it’s about how they are raised, I’ve been brought up with my father cooking meals at home when my mother is tired helping her do things around the house. So fuck your brown guys steriotypes and raise your motherfucking children right.