WARNINGS/TRIGGERS: MENTIONS OF MISCARRIAGE AND PHYSICAL FIGHTS.
“You’re supposed to be in the hospital gown, it’s why we laid it out for you,” Y/N stated, pointing the pen in her hand at the white gown by his feet.
“I’m not wearing that paper shit,” Harry grumbled, “and I’m perfectly fine to leave.”
“That cut says otherwise,” Y/N says.
Harry watches as she sets down the clipboard and turns on the sink to wash her hands, she’s cute. She’s nothing like the kind Harry would go for. His usual prey would be at the bar, lonely, maybe going through a breakup, but he knew for sure that by the end of the night she would be in his bed. Y/N on the other hand looked like too pure for him, and he hated that look.
From his experience Harry had learned that girls like Y/N believed that they were too good for a guy like him. Girls like Y/N, with an innocent smile, soft skin, and soft voices, tended to only use him for one thing, to make their parents upset. Harry had seen it time and time again, it was only a matter of weeks before the girl would crush his heart and move on to someone better.
“I don’t feel anything,” Harry stated.
Harry had grown numb to just about everything. He couldn’t feel the punches thrown at him, he couldn’t feel his emotions, it all just seemed gone to him. He didn’t mind though, no emotions meant he couldn’t get hurt, and no pain meant he was unstoppable.
Boxer Harry Styles highers, incredibly perky Y/N as his on-call nurse.
Remember the last time we saw each other? In your little blue car…. We poured our hearts out to one another. We cried on each other’s shoulders. I confessed my love to you. You confessed your love to me. But you didn’t confess that this was going to be the last night I saw you. Two hundred and twenty-one days later, I still remember this night clearly.
You stopped by to pick up your (very) late Christmas present. You knew how bad I had been, and asked what was wrong. We walked to your little blue car, put the windows down on that cold chilly moonlit night, and talked. I told you everything that was happening to me: My ex-boyfriend and his new guy. A friend that I thought I could trust. And a lover that broke my heart. I also told you I was in a very dark place. Do you remember what I said to you? I’m too ashamed to confess what I did to myself. Please don’t make me say it. I don’t want to see you cry again. Your beautiful emerald looking eyes don’t deserve to have tears in them. They need to keep sparkling and smiling.
After we cried together, I confessed my love to you. I didn’t expect you to say anything. I didn’t expect you to feel the same way. I just wanted you to listen. I remember looking into those dazzling green eyes, holding your hand, and telling you: “I know this sounds cheesy. And I know that it may not seem true. But this is the truth. I promise. I love you. I love you so much. And I want to let you know that I will always love you. No matter what. I don’t care if you’re with someone new. I don’t care if I’m with someone new. I don’t even care if I haven’t talked to you in months, or even years. I will always love you.” You didn’t say anything. You just looked at me with those watery green eyes. You nodded and a tear fell down your cheek.
Then, I asked you what you wanted from me. You said: “I honestly don’t know. I don’t know what I want. I never know what the right choice is. I never know what the right thing to do is. I always hurt you. I don’t want to keep hurting you. We had a lot of fun. And that’s all I wanted at first. And that’s what happened. I liked you. I really did. A lot. Then things changed. I wanted to hang out with you every day and be with you every day. And we did that. I wanted to be closer to you. And we did that too. Then stuff happened, and I got scared. I don’t know. I was scared to be happy. I didn’t want to be in a relationship. I wasn’t prepared at all for how I felt about you. I didn’t know how to take it to the next level. I didn’t know how to be your boyfriend.”
These words still bring tears to my eyes. It’s as if we are star-crossed; forever living different paths in our lives that don’t have any connection in the end, denying us of any chance of living a life together. But how can that be when we are existing at the same time? You’re alive. I’m alive. And I have never felt more alive with anyone else than when I’m with you. Just the way you look at me with those alluring eyes is what convinces me that you are in love with me too. So why aren’t you with me now? Why are you with someone else? Is it because she can give you a family? Is it because you want to believe she’s the one for you? Not just you though, for your whole family. She’s someone they will accept. Nobody would accept me into your family. I think we both know that for sure.
Two hundred and twenty-one days have passed since that night happened. I’ve gone through many stages of: Hating you. Worrying about you. Wondering if you’re dead. Wondering if you’re alive. Pretending you’re dead. Wishing for your presence. All while still loving you. It’s torture.
I don’t know if I should give up. But a part of me feels that I will never find anybody like you. Nobody’s going to look at me the way you did. Nobody’s going to touch me the way you did. Nobody’s going to care about me the way you did. And nobody’s going to understand me the way you do. Every time I talk to someone new, I compare them to you. I know that’s wrong, but it’s true and I can’t help it. That’s when I start to believe that they’re not good enough for me. Because I need to find somebody that’s so good that they make me forget about you… I know that’s not fair and I think that’s what keeps me from letting people in. I put this steel cage around my heart when you left me, and you’re the only one with the key to open it. I just wish you would talk to me. I wish you would tell me to move on, but your silence speaks louder than words. It drives me crazy; leads me to believe that I did something wrong, but I didn’t. Maybe it’s your way of keeping me in the sidelines when things get bad with you and her. I don’t see how that’s fair, but I love you so much that I don’t care. I’ll take any excuse you give me to come back, so long as I get to see your face again.
I’m sorry. I’m sorry for getting close to you. I’m sorry for burdening you with my problems. I’m sorry for loving you. I’m sorry for all of this. Maybe things would’ve been simpler if we just didn’t meet. But as people say, “Two souls don’t just meet by simple coincidence.” I start to wonder why you came into my life. Or was it I that came into yours? I wonder if you’ll ever come back to me, even as a friend. I miss you. I miss you so dearly. Please stay alive while I exist. Whether it’s a year or ten, I will wait for you. Because I love you, and I want to believe that we are meant to be together. I want to wake up every morning to those lovely green eyes of yours.
I wanted to tell you that I forgive you. I forgive you for pretending that I don’t exist. I forgive you for leaving me with no explanation. I forgive you for choosing her over me. I forgive you for falling for me. I get it now. We are just simply not meant to be.
You know me… I always have so much to say to you. I could write books about my love for you. But I have one more important thing to say….
Love always and forever, The boy with the brown eyes
Summary: Reader is sick causing her not wanting to do anything. Convincing Peter to be lazy with her turns into a heated session.
Warnings: Swearing cause I love swearing IRL. Plus Tom swears too :,)
Dominant Peter is going to be a thing \^.^/
P.S: PETER IS IN HIS 20′S IN THE DEADLY SINS SERIES. BESIDES THE FIRST EPISODE OF ENVY. I DON’T WRITE SMUT ABOUT A 15 Y/O. I KNOW SOME PEOPLE DO BUT I WONT CAUSE THAT CREEPS ME OUT.. SO KNOW HE IS IN HIS 20′S
SWEET IN THE STREETS BUT A FREAK IN THE SHEETS!
YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.
Word Count: 1,815 (Sorry it’s short my migraine is killing me and I can’t look at a screen.. I promise the next Lust post will be 2,000 words )
A/N: BTW these are my interpretations of the sins. Of course for Gluttony I’m not going to have the eat a hella ton of food. You will see my interpretations as my pics are posted :) BTW THE OTHER LUST POST IS IN THE WORKS :,)
Comfort. That is all you’re feeling right now. It was one of your favorite feelings. Sadly you couldn’t stay in bed forever which you wished that it was possible. It was unlikely due to the responsibilities you have. This one morning you don’t want to move at all. Your body ached and was sore from training and a night with Peter.
“baby girl,you have to get up..” Peter’s voice making you stir in your peaceful slumber.Your body being shaken lightly.
“Five more minutes…” I mumbled snuggling against the warmth he body produced. He felt so warm and cozy. The warmth lulling you back to sleep.You gladly welcomed sleep till Peter opens his mouth again.
“You have been saying that every time I try and wake you up” his chest moves as he laughs.
“shhhh, just stay with me and we can make up a practice session later.. Please Peter, I’ll make it up to you if you stay with me all day today..” Your leg moving up to his waist pulling him closer. A whimper slips out as you feel how hard he is. You look up to see his eyes a shade darker. His eyes gazing at your lips, his tongue darting out quickly. His lips crash down onto yours in a passionate kiss pulling your body against his.
“darling, fuck” he groans gripping onto your ass tighter. You slowly push your hips again creating a needy friction.The tight grip he had on you made you moan in his ear.
“P-Peter “ you gasp out as his lips leave a path down your neck. The feeling making your eyes flutter shut. You straddle him feeling his cock press against your clothed core. A whimper escaped your lips as you pressed your hips against his. The rocking motion earns you a slap to your ass. His hand coming down against your ass each time you moved your hips.
“god your ass is so red” he moans gripping your tingling cheek in his hand. His hot breath fans across your neck making you shiver. You begin sucking on the base of his neck. A moan slips from Peter’s lips as you turn his skin red.
“You’re so sinful it could bring a holy man to his knees… and you darling always bring me to mine” He tears your panties off causing you to frown.
Stupid Spider strength..
“Peterrrr those were my favorite” I pout rolling us over and pushing him off of the bed. A thud signalling he fell onto the floor. His head pops up from the edge of your bed making you laugh. His curls messy making him look cute and sexy.
“I’ll buy you new ones babe” he laughs standing up walking away. Sitting up on my elbows I look at him heading to the door. Is he seriously going to leave you here?
“You’re just going to wake me up, tease me then leave?” My voice coming out flustered. He closes the door locking it ,seeing that made your eyebrow raise. A smirk appears on his lips as he slips off his sweat pants. His Calvin Kleins showing a print of how hard he really was.
“Karen turn on the Don’t Bother Us Program, then you can turn back on when I say so” Peter speaks to the ceiling.
Your sleeping quarters at the Avengers HQ was styled like an apartment so you and Peter could feel at home. A fancy apartment but it still reminded you of Queens. Tony had windows project sounds and views so it was practically a home away from home.
“Turning on Don’t Bother Us Program,engaging soundproof walls, be safe you two” Karen’s voice then turns off. You hear a beep signaling she was offline.
“You think I was just going to walk out of here to practice, rock hard and leave my girl flustered?” His voice getting lower as his strides bring him to the edge of the bed.Peter’s figure radiated dominance as he looks down at you.
“I-I” You were the stuttering one now. Peter is the one to normally stutter but once in the bedroom hes completely different. It was a good different.
“I told you that you could bring a man to his knees,that only man will be me” Peter’s hands grip your thighs pulling you to the edge.My skin felt like heat and fire under his palms. Your chest rising and falling slowly. He spreads your legs lowering himself down to his knees. The eye contact between you two not breaking at all.
“P-Peter..” his name coming out as a gasp. Feeling his tongue slowly licking between your folds. His thumb starts rubbing your clit in small circles. A loud moan comes out from the sensation. His thumb is then replaced by his tongue as he inserts fingers inside of you. Your nails dig into the sheets as you look down at him pleasing you.
“C’mon babygirl, tell me what you want” His hot breath fanning across your core.
Feeling your stomach tightening as his tongue flicks faster. Arching your back as the pleasure travels in your body. He slid another finger in as your thoughts started jumbling together. Curling his fingers inside you hitting your g-spot when he makes a come hither motion.
“M-more please , I want your cock inside me Peter” you beg as your legs started to twitch. Desperation clear in your voice. The look in his eyes making you on the edge about to cum.
Flicking his free wrist his web shooter expands onto his hand. A web pinning both your hands to the headboard. His chest rose and fell quicker as he gazed at your body. You looked helpless tied up to the headboard. A groan coming from him as you spread your legs , inviting him to you. You wanted him more than ever.
“How bad do you need it” He smirks crawling onto the bed. Your eyes screwed shut while his hand slid up your legs. His hips lowering down towards where you needed him most.
“S-so bad Peter, please baby” you manage to moan out as his lips pressing kisses in between your breasts. Slowly moving back up to your neck. You gasp as he slams into you without warning. The feeling of him inside you causes you to bite our lip.
Peter’s lets out a low moan tilting his head back. All you wanted to do was to touch him but you were restrained. Peter’s hands dug into your hips as his pace started to pick up. Uncontrollable moans came out of your mouth. He filled you up just right making you pant out his name.
“Look at how your tits bounce as I fuck you” His head tilting back, his veins in his neck showing. Holy fuck. You feel his hands move as he angles your hips up. The new angle making a loud moan come out,he went even deeper hitting the right spot. Grunts coming from him as he continued to pound into your dripping pussy. Thank god for the sound proof walls, you were loud when it came to expressing the pleasure you received. Peter loved hearing you thats why he had the system installed.
“P-Peter untie me please I w-want to touch you” your voice coming out as a whisper. You felt out of breath as you looked down. Watching as he filled you up with each thrust.
“I love seeing you like this “ he whispers running his finger down your chest and down your body. Your breath hitching in your throat.
“Under my control, only I can give you pleasure like this..” he whispers as his thrust becoming slower. Panting you try to rip his webs apart with your nails. All you want to do is touch him and run your fingers through his soft curls.
“You can’t get away from me,you wanna know why?” he grins cockily. Bastard knows his new web formula is tougher. His body gets closer to you if that’s even possible. Feeling your hands become free your hand grips onto his curls. The other scratching down his back. He hisses from the pain as your nails dig into his skin.
“Cause you’re my girl” his hand cups your cheek as he thrusts into you harder causing your head to hit the headboard.
“You’re mine, you got that princess?” His hips slam into you harder and harder. Nodding as a reply you keep eye contact with him. The pleasure feeling so intense you felt like you were going to burst.
Peter tugs on your hair letting out a low growl. “Let me hear that pretty voice, answer me” he demands kissing your jaw in fiery kisses.
“I’m y-yours Peter, please let me cum” your moans and whimpers filled the air as he reached between you rubbing your clit in fast circles.
“C’mon darling, cum for me cum all over my cock” Moans come out of his mouth as his thrusts start to get sloppy. The stamina he had in him had you breathless. Your orgasm causes you to hold tightly onto Peter. Your legs trembling as it coursed through you. Him filling you with his load shortly after, collapsing on top of your body.
Peter rolls over pulling your body next to his. Your chest was falling up and down. Both of you were panting trying to catch your breath. Your body could just melt into the mattress,exhaustion taking over you.
“Karen, please start the shower and play some AC/DC for me” Peter speaks up a bit due to his voice being shaky from his breathing.
“Turning on the shower, Peter you lasted a lot longer than you did the last time should we mark it as your new record?” Karen asks waiting for a response.
He was keeping track of how long he could last?
“Peter Benjamin Parker” you sit up looking at your boyfriend. His cheeks turning pink as he sits up.
“You’re seriously keeping track?” You laugh placing your head in your hands. He is such a dork.
“Y-You’re not mad?” He questions tilting your chin up.
“Now I want to see how fast I can make you cum and start my own record” you grin sitting up heading toward the bathroom.
“I already have a record for how fast I can” Peter stands crossing his arms over his chest with a grin.
“Looks like I have to beat you, next time who ever loses has to clean the training rooms next week” you challenge looking back at him.
“Oh it’s so on, you’re going to cum and beg for me like always” he lifts you over his shoulder towards the shower.
“PETER!” You scream out as he starts to tickle your sides. From serious to childish, what a catch.
The hardest part about giving someone else your heart, is that it then belongs to them. Even if things end, they will forever own a piece of you. A piece of the most important part of you, no less. It’s a piece of yourself that you can never get back, not really, not fully.
Six months. One hundred eighty two days. Four thousand three hundred sixty eight hours. That was how long it had been since you felt whole.
cleans up after you, cooks for you, nags a lot; he’s basically your second mom
your friends coming over to hit on him
which he’s totally down with; “I’m worldwide handsome, what do you expect?”
your parents wishing you two would get together
you two cuddle sometimes and it’s fine, it’s nothing romantic. just two friends chilling in each others arms,, move along ppl, nothing to see here
you’re his taste tester
so he often makes you stand by while he cooks, so he can spoon boiling hot sauce from the pot into your mouth to ask if he needs more salt
buys you BTS merch
“I better be your ultimate bias” “look at me, I’m everyone’s bias and bias wrecker” “the real visual of BTS taehyung better back off”
you joke that he’s basically a ghost
he’s usually not there, since he’s at the studio or doing promotions, concerts, etc. and when he is there, he’s sleeping
whenever he’s there and actually awake you’re like “who are you? I didn’t know you lived here” “shut up and tell me what there is to eat in this house. are there any lamb skewers?”
like I said, he’s mostly not there but when he is, he wants to spend some time hanging with you. the boys are fine but he’s so Tired of their antics that time with you is like a breath of fresh air
you don’t do much, just watch tv and order take out but it suites you both just fine. he usually shit talks other celebs during that time, so you know all the inside gossip
“wait, he’s cheating on her with the model??” you gasp
“yeah, I caught them fucking backstage”
“well, damn :( he was my bias”
so f*cking loud omg u wonder why you still live with him
he’s energetic and loud (I can’t stress the loud part) for the most part, even waking you up with pans banging or singing in your ear
insists on “roommate bonding time” which is just an excuse to go out, get drunk & bring back f*ck buddies
has the LOUDEST sex
and walls are thin
but he apologizes w pizza so,, there’s perks to that
walks around half naked
flirts w your hot friends/family members but always asks you if it’s okay to make a serious move on any of them. he doesn’t want to cross any lines that would leave tension between you two
keeps trynna hook you up with one of the boys “except Joonie he’s gross” “he’s exactly like you” “exactly”
always texts & snaps you, sometimes about roommate stuff (”did I leave the stove on?” “which brand of popcorn should I pick up?” “did I leave my keys in the apartment?”) and sometimes just to chat
he likes to send you updates about BTS
he facetimed you at the BBMAS and does so just in general, so you get to see what idol life is really like … lots of sitting backstage, tired but running on adreneline, being hungry, etc
your place is the hangout spot. the guys always come over whether it’s to chill or hold house parties where you’re like “let’s not get twisted and ruin the furniture” but uh,, let’s just say you two aren’t getting your deposits back
refuses to let the guys even hit on you; “you’re too good for them. I’d rather hook you up with someone better. do you like Jackson? wait, nvm he’s worse than us”
totally cool w you bringing back one night stands
hell, he slips you protection too if you need it
is also very aware of you when you’re both out, that no one tries to slip you something or take advantage of you
takes you home if you’re too drunk
nurses you as you throw up but gives you hell for it the next day
he’s basically more like your chill cousin than a roommate
proTECT PROTECT Protect at ALL Costs
he denies this but he loves having you dote on him
it’s a nice feeling, to come back after a long day to your food, a warm home and just chill on the couch with you
he feels comfortable around you, talking about his worries or about his day
turns into Big Brother mode if you’re going to a party or if you start dating. no guy/gal even sets foot into that apartment unless they’re 100% Jimin approved
you’re both protective of each other, like siblings, so living together is a joy
super touchy,, everyone thinks you’re dating but nah man it’s just friends kissing friends, how’s that not normal?
will crawl into your bed quite often
brings home food
insists on late night “adventures” to the convenience store, where you just buy junk food and movies on sale
jungkook practically lives there
you keep “joking” that he needs to pay rent but it’s not a joke anymore like seriously u use up all our hot water give us money
he loves having ppl over, not just jungkook lol, but your friends and his other friends,, your place is usually busy and always a warm environment
buys you matching “friendship” outfits and bracelets that legit are just friendship stuff, no dating
he tells you about his crushes (even before jungkook but don’t tell him)
and you two stay up some nights, stalking yours and his crushes, on their social media accounts, having panic attacks when you accidentally like shit from 38 weeks ago
watching anime 25/8
offering him protection when jimin stays over; “but we’re just friends” “yeah right sure. just hmu if you need them”
it took him a whole year to warm up to you though
he was so awkward and shy, often keeping his distance
he walked in on you pooping once and it took two months for him to walk back into the apartment (he’d been sleeping on jin’s couch lol)
now he farts around you
you two rank the fart based on sound, funniness and smell
*choking* *tearing up* “good one (y/n) that’s a solid 11/10″
will blush himself to death if you bring home someone
doesn’t really bring anyone over himself. he’s too uncomfortable w the fact that you’re there to try anything.
doing childish shit like pranks and eating each others sweets
“kook did u eat my green sweets?”
jk, with green tongue: “no, how could u accuse me??”
The first time I tried to come out to someone I was ten years old and in primary school.
I told a person who was supposed to be one of my best friends. She listened.
The next day when I came to school she had told the twins; my other friends and they all laughed at me and avoided me for days on end. I knew there was something wrong with me then, see!?? So I told them I was just joking and of course I didn’t like girls that way, I’M NOT GAY!
The next time I tried, I told my cousin, my other best friend. She didn’t say a lot about it and just kind of changed the subject. The next time I saw her she asked me if I was being serious with a screwed up look on her face that hit me in the gut like disgust. I felt so sick, am I sick?! There is something so wrong with me. I told her no, of course I wasn’t, I’M NOT GAY, NO REALLY, DEFINITELY!
I started high school desperately trying to be cool, to be normal, to just fit in, why couldn’t I be like all of them? Every now and then someone in the halls would call me a fucking lesbian. It took me right back to those laughs that I heard when I was ten. I was still friends with the same girls who’s laugher haunted me and one night I slept over at their house. They had a brother who was a couple of years older and I thought I might have had a crush on him. It was juvenile wishful thinking. I ended up in his room with the door closed, in the darkness putting his dick in my mouth. After that I asked if I could go home because I was homesick - but I was just sick, I didn’t like anything about him or his dick. I felt so empty and so alone knowing that I was not normal, I was not like any of them. I sat in the bathtub with the door locked at 1am brushing my teeth and trying to erase the stain of what happened.
I came to school on Monday, and people were looking at me. They were talking behind hands and snickering. Someone had told someone and then someone told everyone and they all knew. My mind flew out the second story window in math as a girl passed me a note telling me I was gross and a fucking slut. If anything I thought it would shut them all up? Isn’t that what normal girls do, they like boys and they don’t leave their balls blue?! I had no idea what in the fuck I was supposed to do.
I drifted away from them all, I’d still see them in the halls but we hardly ever talked anymore. I found out that there were certain boys that stayed seperate from the jocks, and their flocks, so I started hanging out with them. They didn’t really care about much of anything and for once I felt a tiny bit of what I thought was belonging. Of course I engaged in ridiculous dating charades where I was one of their girlfriends. We’d occasionally kiss and hold hands and that was it, and I thought it might finally look like I fit. But I still heard it, from time to time “HEY DYKE, ARE YOU A LEMON OR A LIME?” I’d just put my head down and hide. I’d hide behind my boyfriend who was sweet and kind and dopey and gentle, even though most days he kind of drove me mental.
One day there was a new guy at school, I saw him before roll call in the hall and thought he looked cool. Later that day in science, he was sitting opposite me, and I smiled, he smiled back. We’re still friends and it’s about fourteen years down the track - how did we get to that? Well…
The next time I came out it was to him, and he told me he was the same as me. Of course I chose to come out under the label of bisexuality, because I still thought guys were kind of cute and it provided me with a shield of a certain safety and half normality. He didn’t flinch or cringe or look at me with hate, he just said he was the same, and my shame started to deflate a little. I started to breathe full breaths for the first time in so long, and I started to believe maybe I wasn’t so fucking wrong.
The next time I tried to come out to somebody I was sixteen and it was my mother. I’d spent years in torture and isolation trying to figure myself out, who I really was, what it was all about. I told her I was bi and she was quiet for a while. After I prompted her for a response she said “but how do you know?” with a condescending smile. She told me I was young, and that I hadn’t even slept with anyone so how could I possibly know what I am?? Rage is the only thing I could feel at that stage, HOW COULD I KNOW WHAT I AM? The same way you knew you weren’t what I am, that’s how. I’ve spent years hating myself for being this way, and this is the stupidity I’m faced with now? Like I had just flippantly decided that I would announce something I wasn’t even sure of? I was floored, and thus thereafter the topic was purposefully ignored. The silence said all I needed to know, this was something I just wasn’t supposed to show, it’s just one of those things that was a no go. Certain people could be trusted with my secret, the thing that people didn’t seem to want to see, but I had to be very careful about who that would be.
So I shut it down and compartmentalised my difference and tried to survive. Three years went by before I opened that door again, to a trusted friend. I never intended to tell her, but she asked me in a way that seemed so tender, there were no teeth waiting to bite me, and even though it frightened me I told her. She didn’t even care, she was just curious, maybe she was questioning things in herself like some of us do. That was the first time I really knew that I wasn’t my shame and I wasn’t my pain and I wasn’t some thing to be hidden away. I decided then to be more open. To live authentically and do what felt right for me. But I still remained private about it unless asked explicitly - then I would answer as honestly as I knew how, because truthfully I’m still figuring all of it out. I’ve learned so much about diversity and gender and sexual identity and sometimes I find the right words that seem to fit, and other times the pressure of a label exhausts me and I get sick of it.
Sick of trying to classify myself under certain banners, sick of people asking things without any thought of manners.
I know on the grand spectrum of things I am not at all like them, I fall somewhere else along the Kinsey scale. Maybe that means in a way I fail the people like me, because I can’t cement things or write it in concrete and sign it to make it complete. Or that sometimes I still find myself in certain situations where I’m being discreet, holding my candour for fear of ramifications and slander. Maybe I’m not full of pride, maybe because for so long all I could do was hide. This makes me feel so guilty, I should be proud of who I am unapologetically! Not just for me but for the sake of visibility, so that maybe more people can see - we aren’t wrong, we don’t have any agenda other than to be able to be! Just to be; to live with an open vulnerability and tranquility and to be able to do it safely!! I’m sorry, that I could not join in on the pride but maybe you’ll know why; it’s hard to celebrate something that for most of your life you’ve had to justify to people, to justify to yourself, for most of your life you’ve carefully withheld.
“Internalised Homophobia - Where Is My Pride?”
Pride month is such a wonderful thing and I know it is over now but it inspired me to share this. It’s intensely personal, not very well written and lengthy, but I wanted to be able to share some of my experiences regarding this topic. In no way do I speak for the whole LGBT+ community in this post and it’s simply a personal journey that I wrote out for catharsis.
A/N: This took me so long to finish. Here’s a mix between some jerking off and some passionate sex. I’d love to hear what you think.
Word count: 3,295
After Karen and I picked up Shawn at the airport, we went straight back to their house to spend the night. Though Shawn would have rather gone home, he’d finally given in after a couple of hours pouting childishly in the car from the airport and back to Pickering.
It wasn’t that I didn’t understand he wanted to spend his first night back in his own apartment, but his cousin were graduating tomorrow and driving all the way back and forth two days in a row was just stupid when Karen and Manny had left Shawn’s old room untouched since he moved.
Harry watches the wall clock as he waits patiently on his couch, counting the minutes until Y/n finally wakes up.
He’s barely slept all night, feeling a mix of anxiousness and misery as he thought of all the outcomes that could happen today. He also found himself looking at Y/n all night, watching her in her calmest state of mind and feeling a sense of tranquility as he sees her in her most beautiful form.
He could never get tired of it—admiring her in her sleep. But as the morning passed and the late afternoon started approaching, Harry didn’t know what the hell was going on.
She was still asleep, crashed on top of him as snores raided her mouth and the only movement being the slight rise and fall of her chest against his. He started to worry, solely for the fact that she slept at a completely reasonable time last night and was known to be an early riser. And since he barely got a blink of sleep, he knows she didn’t wake up for a second during the night.
At first, when it hit 12 hours since she’d fallen asleep, he tried to brush hair out of her face in an attempt to wake her from her slumber. Nothing came to his avail, however, when all he got was a slight shake of her head and a small smacking of her lips.
When the afternoon started to approach, he started to move his fingertips along her back and neck. But again, nothing; just a slight groan and a movement of her hips to get away from the sensation.
He gave up after that, helpless in disturbing her sleep and trying to get some sort of reassurance in the midst of his worrying. He really needed something, because his nerves were getting the best of him and he needed to rid the anxiety building inside of him.
That’s when he decided to call Gabby.
“She fell asleep at around 10:00 last night and it’s nearly 2:00 now. She’s barely moved, she’s still right on top of me and doesn’t even flinch when I turn. I’m really worried.”
Harry lifts his hand to her hair, softly brushing the knots out with his fingers, waiting to see if there’s any sudden movement. But there’s nothing, just the movements of her soft breath and the occasional repositioning of her neck.
“She’s barely slept in months, Harry. She’s not fully comfortable here, no matter how much she tries to tell me she is. There are nights she doesn’t sleep at all. She’s completely incapable of being alone anymore, she’s always thinking and it doesn’t let her calm down in the slightest, you know? And mixed with everything that happened last night, she’s probably extremely exhausted. Just let her get her sleep, yeah? She really needs it, trust me. Besides, you being there is helping her in the most.”
He looks down at Y/n, where her cheek is pressed against his chest as her eyes are closed in a dream. She looks most beautiful this way. It’s the peaceful, angelic side of her that he always remember her being.
She looks safe, too—away from any potential hurting and pressed so close against him as if he were the protector of her heart. He almost laughs at the irony of it all, how she’s the exact opposite of peaceful and nowhere near protected from any harm—especially in his arms.
And there’s a part of him that wishes he could stay in this moment forever, holding her to him as he watches her in her must vulnerable state. She doesn’t push him away, or tell him to stop staring at her, or cry because he still can’t figure out what to say. She’s oblivious to his admiration, and the second she regains consciousness in her reality, he knows this moment can’t last much longer, no matter how badly he wants it to.
“Yeah, of course I’ll let her sleep. You think I can move from underneath her without waking her? Might make her some food, can feel her stomach growl.”
“Yes, please make her something. She gets really upset sometimes and forgets to eat. They’ll be days I have to remind her. She really needs you to provide for her right now, more than anything. She shouldn’t wake up, though.”
It doesn’t take much convincing to get Harry up from the couch. Although it was a bit of a struggle to maneuver himself from underneath Y/n’s body and out of her tight hold on him—especially between her occasional whimpers and groans from the sudden movements—he managed to do so without waking her up too much.
He decides to make her her favorite breakfast, as well. He knows it won’t distract her from the problems they have to face, but it’s something—it’s something as opposed to all the nothingness he’s been giving her.
It doesn’t take much longer than half an hour before Y/n finally wakes up from her slumber. She’s confused upon her awakening, groggy and the remaining amount of exhaustion still present in her body.
She’s comforted, though, when she acknowledges that she’s back home with the aroma of breakfast filling the air. It reminds her of old times—mornings of her anniversaries with Harry and mornings of their birthdays or purposeful events. It’s everything that she’s missed and it brings a soft smile to her face. Only for a second, though.
“Afternoon.” He smiles softly, eyes watching her every movement as she leans against the doorway of the kitchen.
In any other circumstance, he would have greeted her with a proper kiss and held her against him for a while; but as he observes her red eyes, her tear-stained cheeks, and her overall broken down structure, he knows not to overstep his boundaries.
Y/n frowns, watching what would normally be the most heartwarming sight of her life—Harry cooking in the kitchen of their home, a smile on his face while the sun peeks through the windows—but is now only seeing it as something that could have been.
She wonders if this is how he spent his mornings with Jessica.
He frowns slightly, too, when he sees her in the way she is now. There’s absolutely no life to her. He can tell that the Y/n that he knew is long gone—now replaced by a much more miserable soul. It almost brings tears to his eyes, seeing how much damage and destruction he’s caused onto her. He feels as if he’s taken away Y/n’s heart entirely, only leaving her to suffer through the loss.
“I, uh—" he mutters softly, realizing that he’s been staring at her for longer than he’s probably supposed to, “I made you some chocolate chip pancakes. I know it’s a little after lunch time but Gabby told me you haven’t been eating as much and well, I kind of figured I’d make you something I know you can’t resist.”
She wants to appreciate the gesture, she does. She wishes that she could look past the gloomy side of the situation, and instead focus on the fact they’re together again. Even if it’s the bare minimum—where Harry does all the speaking while she just listens with a stupid pout on her face—there’s a reflection of what their relationship was like before their time apart, and she feels as if it should be making her feel something other than sick to her stomach.
But she just can’t, no matter how hard she tries. She can’t quite understand how he’s doing so well. Not a part of him resembles her ruined self. He’s so put together, even after everything that’s happened. He’s still alive, which is almost the exact opposite of how she feels; and she can’t help but to wonder if he ever felt the way she did—broken and helpless. She wonders if he even cared.
And if there’s anything that can make her feel worse than she already does, it’s if Harry continues to pity her—to treat her like a charity case when he was the reason for all of this. He should be the one sulking from his mistakes, on his knees begging for mercy, but it’s her. She’s suffering the pain for the both of them and she doesn’t know how much longer she can bare it.
“Is this how it’s going to be?” She whispers, tears flowing from her eyes and she’s genuinely surprised that there’s still some left to cry.
Harry’s heart stops as he watches her break again. He doesn’t want to witness her in that form again, he doesn’t even know if he can; and imagining the pain that must be bursting through her veins is only making this harder for him.
“You’re just going to pretend like everything is okay? While I stand here, practically begging you to say something to me about all this, you just continue to show off how perfectly fine you are?”
“What?” He asks, nearly dumbfounded by her accusations. “No, baby. That’s not—no.“
He doesn’t know exactly where all this came from, considering there isn’t any part of him that’s feeling any sort of sanity. He’s been suffering, too, no matter how much he tries to hide it for her sake. The masking his hurt has been hiding under has been wearing thin over the past couple of weeks, but he couldn’t bring himself to show her how much this affected him.
He was always the one to stay strong for the both of them. No matter what came their way, he was always the one to bottle up all of his emotions and get them through whatever it was bringing them down. He couldn’t break, especially not in front of her. He has to be the one to mend them back together; he doesn’t have a choice, considering he was the one who broke it up in the first place.
“You think I’m fine? You actually think I’m okay with all this? You haven’t even—you haven’t even seen me before last night, and even then I was a wreck. Y/n, how could you even think like that?”
“Look at you!” She yells, eyes widened and teeth clenched as she speaks. Her hands are at her head, pressing at her temples in complete hysteria and despair. “All fucking pretty and perfect! I don’t see anything wrong with you, like there’s nothing gripping at your throat or feeding your insides with the guilt that should be eating you fucking alive right now!”
“And look at me! Just take a goddamn look at me and how fucked up I am! Do you see what the problem is? Do you see how none of this is fair to me? Fuck you and fuck your precious happiness, and fuck your selfish decisions and just fuck you, Harry! Fuck you!”
Her voice is harsh and loud enough to nearly echo from the walls. The cries and whimpers haven’t stopped, either, and there’s a certain type of tension building between them that’s nearly sucking the air from their throats.
But she’s not stopping, not yet. She still has so much to say and nothing is getting in her way, not now.
“How did it feel, Harry?! How did it feel to love on some other woman while your ex-girlfriend was alone and breaking on her bed?! Was it nice?! How did it feel?!”
Harry’s jaw clenches once the words leave her mouth, and his hands are balling to fists at the side of his thighs. He’s frustrated—frustrated because she’s so blinded by her own pain that she hasn’t eve acknowledged his. And the way she’s making it sound—like he doesn’t love her, like he doesn’t care—almost makes him throw up.
As much as he fucked up, he never imagined to be perceived as such a villain. She’s looking down on him, digging into his insecurities and accusing him of being a man he knows he’ll never be capable of being, and he doesn’t like it one bit. As much as he had done wrong, he never found pleasure in her pain and he doesn’t even want to think about how that thought processed through her brain.
“Are you being serious right now? You really need to tell me this isn’t some sort of sick joke.”
Her eyes narrow up at him, and for the first time since he’s seen her, she starts to laugh.
It’s a habit she’s obtained whenever she tries to hold back all the anger boiling inside of her. It’s a rare occasion, considering she never really gets mad, especially at him. But she’s on the edge of complete rage, and she feels it building inside of her.
She still has tears falling from her eyes, and they’re both unsure whether it’s from the laughter, the pain, the anger, or all three of them.
“You think I’m joking? You want to hear a real joke, Harry? You saw me. You saw me at the grocery store, you saw me looking at Jessica wearing our shirt and you didn’t do anything! You did absolutely nothing, you just fucking stood there and watched me fall apart. What kind of twisted shit was that, Harry? Did it make you feel good about yourself? Or was it a nice image to look back on while you fucked Jessica the following night?”
All his frustration subsided when her voice started to crack and shake between her words. Her emotions are scattered, along with his, but he can’t help but feel an aching in his chest when he sees how helpless she looks.
Looking back at it, Y/n gets the same exact feeling she did that morning—betrayed, broken, and completely hated. There is no other explanation for it. He had to have hated her, for whatever reason it may be, it’s the only thing that makes sense.
The Harry that loved her would never leave her to fend for herself. He wasn’t the same man she remembered him being. The kindhearted, selfless, loving man she fell in love with was not the man she came to contact with—standing with a mysterious girl, showing her off in the t-shirt that meant everything to him and Y/n.
He had to have hated her.
“Is that—“ his voice cracks, and he has to swallow the lump building in his throat before he continues to speak, “Is that what you think? That I just watched because I’m heartless?”
She sighs, shaking her head softly. She crosses her arms at her chest, tucking her hands beneath them as her eyes drift away from his.
She never thought he was heartless, but there must have been something he had against her for him to not say anything to her. She deserved an explanation, or even a half-assed apology at the slightest. But she got nothing. All she got silence and heartbreak and everything inside of her knew that she didn’t deserve it.
There had to have been something.
“No, I just—I never felt so hated before. It was like—like you found some sort of comfort in watching me suffer. You never did that, Harry. You never did that to me, not in all the years that I’ve known you and knowing that you didn’t want me anymore was like all the life was sucked out of me all at once.”
She closes her eyes as she sobs, clutching the fabric of her shirt in her hands right where her heart is.
“Just imagine feeling your heart stop beating and your lungs collapsing all at once. I thought you hated me, Harry. Nothing was worse than feeling that, nothing.”
An inhumane sound emits from Harry’s chest—something between a sob and a growl—a sound she’s never heard before and it’s utterly pitiful.
He’s never thought of it in that way. The thought of Y/n thinking he’s hated her never crossed his mind, always just assuming that she was so upset because Jessica crept her way into his life. But the more he thinks about it, all the more it makes sense.
When he saw Dan wearing Harry’s ring, all the hope that Y/n was ever going to love him again was ripped away from him. The feeling of betrayal and heartbreak was so overwhelming because while he was suffering from the loss of her, she was finding comfort in somebody else and nothing brought him more pain than thinking she didn’t love him anymore.
And that’s exactly what he did to her. She was waiting for him—waiting for him to come back and fight for their relationship. She was alone and hurt all throughout the nights while he was finding pleasure in another woman to get him through the pain.
He’s put her through so much that she didn’t deserve, and he doesn’t know how he can live with himself for it.
He whimpers, tentatively reaching out for the hand that’s decorated with his rose ring, and slowly brings her against his chest. She buries her face in his t-shirt as she weeps out the rest of her tears, tugging at the back of his t-shirt in agony.
“No, baby. No. Please don’t ever think that. I didn’t say anything because I didn’t know what to say, and everything that I wanted to say was getting so scrambled inside of my brain that I couldn’t even understand what was happening. There were so many things, my love. There were so many things I wanted to say to you but I just couldn’t, and it’ll be something I have to live with for the rest of my life.”
He presses a kiss to the top of her head, squeezing her a little tighter in his arms as he brushes out her hair between his fingers.
She feels his tears at the top of her head, but she doesn’t pay any attention to it. All she can wrap her head around is that Harry’s holding her again, shielding her from any other hurting that could get to her. And as much as she does want to push him away, she can’t, because she can finally fucking breathe again.
“And I’m so sorry, Y/n. I’m so sorry for all of this. I could never hate you, my love. I love you so goddamn much, you have to believe me. You don’t deserve this pain, sweetheart. I’ll do whatever it takes to mend you, okay? If you give me the chance, I’ll take the time to fix you. You just have to work with me.”
She nods against his chest, pushing him away from her a little bit so that she can look at him in the eyes. They’re red and soaked with tears, but she’s missed them all too much and they still make her weak in the knees.
“This will be a slow process, do you understand me? There’s a lot of lost trust and a lot of work that needs to be done when it comes to our relationship. I’m not risking this again, so we’re taking this slowly. I’ll stay at Gabby’s for another few weeks until I can fully trust you again. You’re not pulling that shit on me where you call Jessica when you’re lonely, you hear me? You call me. We’re in this together and we’re in this for a long time, but we have to do this my way.”
He nods feverishly, closing his eyes as he does so. His fingers dig into her back as he exhales strongly, almost as if releasing a breath he’s been holding in.
“We’ll go at your pace, sweetheart, I promise.”
She smiles softly—a true, heartwarming smile that Harry swears he could look at for the rest of his life. It somehow mends the ache in his chest and he starts to cry from happiness, this time, and he’s never been so relieved in his life.
“We’re really doing this, huh?” She giggles, running her fingertips along his back. “We’re really starting this all over again?“
He smiles down at her, admiring the woman he’s loved with every bit of his heart. She’s never looked so goddamn perfect, either, in this moment of complete serendipity.
R: They get mad at their s/o but they were at fault.
Requested by @minlii:
Hi^^ can i request a bts reaction to them getting really mad at their gf (but really so things got out of hand and she starts crying etc.) But they later realise they were at fault and she didn’t do anything wrong? Thank you♡
A/N: You guys sure love angst. I can never write a few lines when it comes to angst tho damn ;A; btw I’m sorry J-Hope stans, this one might hurt a tad oopsie!
❛ I hate that I love you. ❜ ❛ I can’t stand the fact that I love you. ❜ ❛ I’d rather die than spend one more second loving you. ❜ ❛ If I could, I would make myself fall out of love with you. ❜ ❛ Why is it so hard for to love me the way I do you? ❜ ❛ I love you but please get out of my sight. ❜ ❛ I never said that I loved you.. ❜ ❛ I love you but not that much. ❜ ❛ You’re confusing the words love and like with one another. ❜ ❛ Did you really think that I could ever love you? ❜ ❛ We are not meant to love one another. ❜ ❛ The last thing I want to do with you is love you. ❜ ❛ I feel like I’m waiting on something that isn’t going to happen. ❜ ❛ Here we go, here we go again. Now you’re telling me that you love me. ❜ ❛ You only tell me you love me when you’re drunk or need something. ❜ ❛ You say you love me and then turn around do this? ❜ ❛ I’ve doubted this whole relationship ever since it started. ❜ ❛ I don’t want to be in love with you anymore. ❜ ❛ I never asked fall in love with you! ❜ ❛ It’s not my fault that you love me more than I love you. ❜ ❛ I’m tired of you walking all over my heart and emotions! Someday, mark my word. ❜ ❛ One day, I will fall out of love with you and I cannot wait for that day to come. ❜ ❛ I miss you but I’m better off without you around. ❜ ❛ I want to push you off a cliff but hurry and be there to catch you at bottom. ❜ ❛ I want to strangle you sometimes but then quickly bring you back to life. ❜ ❛ I’m drowning in you and I don’t think even I can save myself. ❜ ❛ Have a nice life, I’m done trying to be in it. ❜ ❛ I couldn’t let go of you even if I literally did. ❜ ❛ I could let go of you but I would still be there, standing, unmoving. ❜ ❛ I don’t want to be saved from drowning in you. ❜ ❛ All you do is break me and all I do is love you for it. ❜ ❛ I wish that my hate for you would override the love. ❜ ❛ The love I have for you overrides the hate I have for you. ❜ ❛ I’m in misery with and without you. ❜ ❛ I’m just as miserable without you as I am with you. ❜ ❛ I just want you to stop hurting me! Is that so hard? ❜ ❛ Why can’t you see? All you do is play with my emotions. ❜ ❛ I’m tired of this roller coaster ride with you. ❜ ❛ Please spare me the apology that I’ve heard so many times before. ❜ ❛ I’m used to it by now, okay? I almost expect it. ❜ ❛ Is it bad for me to say that I’m used to it? ❜ ❛ I wouldn’t know how to act if you started treating me better. ❜ ❛ I am so stuck with this love for you, I want it to go away. ❜ ❛ I spend more time crying than anything because of you. ❜ ❛ You say it’s the last time every time. ❜ ❛ How many more times are you going to apologize and I just forgive you? ❜ ❛ I’m weakened by your words every time. ❜ ❛ I feel like a puppet and your the puppet master, just doing whatever while I suffer. ❜ ❛ I’ve long lost the thought that you actually cared. ❜ ❛ i’m hurting while I’m with you.. ❜ ❛ I just keep on running right back to you. ❜ ❛ I don’t want to let it go, I can’t let it go. ❜ ❛ I fight the whole world for you if I have too. ❜ ❛ I’m not giving up on us having happiness one day. ❜ ❛ This love is taking all my energy. ❜ ❛ This love will be the death of me but I know I’ll die happily. ❜ ❛ Though my heart can’t take no more I keep running back to you. ❜ ❛ My heart is beating for you but I can’t stop crying. ❜ ❛ All the things we accept, be the things we regret. ❜ ❛ I don’t know how I allow you to treat me so bad and still I stay. ❜ ❛ When I get the strength to leave you, you always tell me you need me. ❜ ❛ I’m mad because I love you. ❜ ❛ I stop to think you could appreciate me then it all remains the same. ❜ ❛ My biggest fear is that you will never change. ❜ ❛ I’m sad and in love, that’s not how it’s supposed to go. ❜ ❛ At this point I’m bulletproof with you, so hit me with your best shot. ❜ ❛ Will you ever get tired of hurting me? Will I ever get tired of letting you hurt me? ❜ ❛ The last thing I want is to go back but I know I will because I’m weak. ❜ ❛ You are biggest downfall. ❜ ❛ You are the piece of me I wish I didn’t need. ❜ ❛ I still fight and I don’t know why. ❜ ❛ If our love is insanity, why are you my clarity? ❜ ❛ It’s so hard to love someone who doesn’t know how to love. ❜ ❛ I’m feeling really unappreciated but that’s not new. ❜ ❛ I don’t know how much more my heart can take. ❜ ❛ So sad what love will make you do. ❜ ❛ I can’t stand how much I need you. ❜ ❛ When will this ever finally come to it’s end? You and me? ❜ ❛ Everything you do makes me smile and I like you for a while. ❜ ❛ You know exactly what to do so I can’t stand at you. ❜ ❛ I despise that I adore you. ❜ ❛ You completely know the power that you love. ❜ ❛ It’s not fair how you take advantage of the fact that I love you beyond the reason why. ❜ ❛ You’ll probably always have this affect on me. ❜ ❛ Tell a lie that makes me want to stay, like you always do. ❜ ❛ If it’s real then I guess I’ll feel the pain. ❜ ❛ It’s hard to love someone who can’t be loved. ❜ ❛ This love I can’t undo, you got me bound to you. ❜ ❛ Please, don’t tell me that you love me. ❜ ❛ I would’ve given you all my heart but there’s someone who’s torn it a part. ❜ ❛ I’ll try to love again but I know the first cut is the deepest. ❜ ❛ When it comes to loving me, he’s worst. ❜ ❛ You say the words but it just don’t feel right. ❜ ❛ You say you’ve changed but we both you’re begging, don’t fool me. ❜ ❛ You say you dream of my face but you don’t like me, you just like the chase. ❜ ❛ I bet you start loving me when I find somebody else, somebody better than you. ❜ ❛ I’m letting you go, I’m loving myself. ❜ ❛ I’m going crazy without you, you got me so confused. ❜ ❛ All you have to do is that ‘i’m sorry’ and ‘i’m in love with you.’ ❜ ❛ You’re truth is hard to believe. ❜ ❛ You walked away and I walked away but we should’ve stayed. ❜
Please write a short fic about tony catching peter drinking i would die omg
He froze, eyes widening as he heard the all-too-familiar sound of expensive leather brogues scuffing along the floor a few meters from him, and he turned quickly, brow furrowed into a deep V as he watched Tony wander up to him, all smiles and casual posture, hands buried in the pockets of his grease-stained jeans. He looked like he’d come straight from the workshop, stopping only to throw on a leather jacket along the way.
Why he was here at all, however, made no sense at all.
“T- Mr Stark,” Peter said, trying to communicate with him through eyebrow movements alone. If it turned out that he had to suit up and help out somewhere, he was pretty fucked, considering the fact he’d had a bit to drink at the party he’d been invited to.
Well. He said ‘a bit’. It was possibly more accurate to say ‘a fucking shit-ton’, but whatever.
Tony looked at him blankly, before shooting another smile toward the circle of people who were stood around Peter and staring quite blatantly at the both of them. “Hello, ladies and gentlemen, I’m afraid I have to take Mr Parker away. He’s an intern at Stark Industries, you know how it is. Lots of work, yadda yadda, okay bye,”
And before Peter could even open his mouth, Tony had grabbed him by the arm and snatched the solo cup out of his hand almost angrily, pulling him away from the group of people and through the crowds of rowdy teenagers that littered the huge house.
“Uh, Mr Stark, wha’dd’ya want me for, exactly?” Peter asked, speaking loudly above the blaring music and wincing at how slurred his voice came out.
It had been a weird month, okay. He was just trying it out.
Tony paused, and Peter saw him purse his lips even tighter before beginning to walk again, guiding Peter through the crowds and holding him tight as he stumbled a little.
“Hey, Parker, leaving so soon?” Flash called out from somewhere to his left, and Peter stopped turning to face him as the other boy wandered toward them. “We haven’t even begun yet, Jesus, are you a pussy or what-”
“Kid,” and suddenly Tony had let go, spinning around and walking up to Flash, who seemed to suddenly recognise who exactly Tony was, because his eyes went hilariously wide and he stumbled backward a few steps. Peter snorted involuntarily, and he saw Tony turn briefly, before shaking his head and looking back to Flash, “it seems like you’re having an absolute ball here, but I’m gonna say something and I’m only going to say it once.”
Tony looked down at Flash, eyes harsh as he drew a little closer. “Leave. Peter. Out of it. Do you understand? He is not here for you to manipulate, not here for you to bully into trying out crazy shit for your amusement-”
“Tony, what the fuck,” Peter blurted, frowning and stepping forward, more than a little put out. He’d only just managed to get accepted by Flash and all the other popular kids, and Tony was just going in, ruining it all, “you’re not my dad- don’t tell me or my friends what I can and can’t do.”
Tony turned, eyebrows raised. “Friends?” He snorted, shaking his head and walking over to Peter once more, taking him by the arm. “You haven’t called in with Aunt May for two days now,” he hissed into Peter’s ear, “she’s worried sick. You are coming with me, right now.”
“No ‘m not,” Peter pushed his hand off, looking over at Tony in anger. “You are fucking….embarrassing me…. in fron’ of my friends-”
“They are not your friends!” Tony snarled, pulling his arm again, “your friends are all currently at home, worrying their asses off because this is not like you, Peter, and they didn’t know what to fucking do, so they ended up calling me. Now you will fucking follow me out of this goddamn place right now, or I am hauling you out.”
series warnings: mature themes, strong language, violence, substance abuse, eventual smut. this chapter contains graphic content such as mental health deterioration & grief, smut, injury recovery, violence, death, blood & gore and dead bodies
Summary: Modern!AU You hate James Barnes with a burning passion and the feeling is entirely mutual. Just when you think things can’t get any worse, you are tricked into attending his sister’s wedding as his girlfriend. Stuck with a bunch of strangers, you come up with a set of rules that are not going to last long.
Warnings: The usual + Angst
A/N: I’m spamming you guys with fics lol sorry. Also please, don’t let this series flop, I beg you! Alright, I’ll stop whining now. Enjoy :)
You woke up from your nap and stretched your arms over your
head since there was no one sitting next to you. The book Bucky asked
ordered you to read was on the empty seat next to yours. With a heavy sigh, you
picked it up, threw it in your travel bag and left.
Bucky was waiting for you on the platform, his foot tapping
impatiently. The next couple of days were going to be the longest of your life.
It was never the same. After he had met you, he stopped caring about his relationship, but tried so hard to do what he could to get the same spark he used to have. Don’t get him wrong – there was a spark, but it didn’t come close to the one he had with you.
His bandmates had even noticed this change. It wasn’t obvious, but he had been with his bandmates for more than three years now. They knew about his behavior. It was less excitable when he saw his girlfriend, maybe he went over to her place more, but it seemed as if he was forcing himself to.
Time for some weekly recs!!! Also there is something I want to address… The Larry fandom has amazing fic writers (and content creators in general) but there is a serious lack of active readers in the fandom. If you love a fic or have enjoyed reading it, please leave a comment to appreciate their hard work! It doesn’t take you much time but it makes their day!! It also encourages them to write more! Keeping that in mind, let us move on to the actual fic rec:
Louis Tomlinson is newly single for the first time in his adult
life. He’s just ended his relationship with his uni-sweetheart and
things are messy to say the least. Zayn has never been good at coping,
so when he flaunts his new man to Louis, Louis is less than surprised.
He knows it’s not going to last. Harry has horrible taste in food,
drinks beer but inexplicably has a six-pack, owns the ugliest boots
known to man-kind and has a really kind heart. Louis shouldn’t still be
so tangled up in his old life, and he definitely shouldn’t be having
regular conversations with his ex’s new boyfriend… but things are
Or, The one where Louis falls for his old man’s new man.
** Inspired by Ed Sheeran’s song! There is a bit of zouis and zarry but nothing explicit.
Um…” Harry said slowly after a moment. “Okay. That’s… this is… Let
me get this straight.” He lifted up a hand and swallowed. “You told
your family that you have a boyfriend… and my name was the first one you
“Harry Potter was on TV, alright? It wasn’t that much of a
stretch.” Louis pinched the bridge of his nose. He couldn’t believe he
was explaining himself to Harry fucking Styles. He couldn’t believe he
was stooping this low. “Forget it. I’m sorry I even thought about
bringing you into this.”
Harry snorted. “What? Did you want me to pretend to be your boyfriend or something?”
**This is an old one that I reread. A very cute fake relationship AU. Plus A/B/O. So win-win!!
Louis is a soft omega with an abusive past and an alpha child A few months after getting a divorce, Louis meets Harry, an ex-military alpha wolf that offers him something -odd.
In exchange for teaching him how to cook, Harry will babysit his son, Abraham Louis really could use the help.
**Oh god!! This fic! At last we have a kid fic where the kid actually acts like a kid!!! Abby or Abraham is so cute here and there is no kid playing matchmaker stuff here which I love because it is much more believable like that! This story is heartwarming and the character dynamics are to die for! Harry might seem a little ooc but it is for a reason. Give this fic a read (BTW, the author’s writing style is a little unique. It gets some getting used to. They have written one of my all time fav fics but that is for another time)
Harry and Louis have been friends forever, but they couldn’t be more
different. One night, with a little too much alcohol, they make a pact
to marry in ten years if they’re both still single. Now, one month
before the deadline, Louis is willing to do whatever it takes to avoid
ending up with his best friend. But is he, really? | Loosely inspired by
The 10 Year Plan
**This fic was good! The angst comes in small but powerful doses!
When Harry Styles, a mid-level talent, Finder, and small business owner,
sets off on the vacation of a lifetime with his best friend, Niall
Horan, he has no idea the changes his life will undergo over the next
nine days. He’s got it all planned - there’s going to be shore
excursions, lounging by the pool on the deck of the luxurious cruise
ship, not to mention margaritas. What he does not plan for are the new
friends, new bonds, or the mystery from his past that comes back to
haunt him, and he certainly hasn’t planned for Louis.
**Another reread! The setting of the fic is very unique. That is the first thing that drew me in. The characters (especially Louis) are very nicely fleshed out. Also, prepared to be surprised!
the one where Harry Styles has a bad reputation and a heart of gold,
and Louis Tomlinson wishes he wasn’t so enchanted by boys who looked
like Disney characters and wore shirts with bumble bees on them.
Louis is the director of the Styles Elephant Sanctuary and really
doesn’t want to babysit his funder’s spoiled lay-about son for two
**Ooh another unique fic. Louis is the director of an elephant sanctuary and Harry is the son of Anne, the main sponsor of the said sanctuary. Its kind of enemies to lovers!!
He and Harry have never had an interaction outside of this car, and
they probably never will. After all, Harry is just the guy that drives
Louis to work, and Louis is just another customer. That’s all they are,
Harry drives an Uber and Louis’s life is falling apart.
**This fic hits you like a ton of bricks. If you want to cry in a very uncool way, read this.
“Hi, I’m Harry. I don’t think we’ve met yet, just wanted to say
I’m excited to work with you.” Harry says once he’s walked over,
smiling at Louis. He would go for a handshake but that seems a bit too
“Hi, are you one of the extras?” Louis responds, clearly trying to be polite and failing. Harry feels himself start to frown.
no, I’m Harry, Harry Styles? I play Alex.” he explains. Obviously he’s
not egotistic enough to think everyone on set should know who he is. But
then again, they did so far.
“Ohhh, the pop star right?” Louis quips.
And okay. That’s probably the most blatant anyone has been about their preconceptions of him.
yeah, I’m in a band if that’s what you mean. We’re on a hiatus right
now but we’re still working on music.” he says, trying not to be
affected by Louis’ condescension.
“Right, so not an actor. Just a
way to get us more press.” It’s annoying but Louis’ slight smirk really
suits him. He’s literally standing there insulting Harry but Harry feels
almost charmed. Still offended, though.
AU where Harry can’t seem to win over his Dunkirk co-star. Inspired by Joey and Kate from Friends.
**I loved this one. We seriously need more Dunkirk AUs in this fandom. Plus its based on FRIENDS!
Harry’s one of Hollywood’s biggest actors, has made a
name for himself in prestigious films and lives the life of a superstar.
There’s just one thing missing to make it picture-perfect, but the one
Harry’s in love with is completely out of reach for him. Enter Louis,
one of Hollywood’s biggest actors himself, who just came out of the
closet and taps new genres in the industry. When Louis sacks the role
Harry auditioned for in Scorsese’s next big film, their irrational feud
starts. Who could have guessed it would get even worse when for promo
season, their teams decide to present them as a couple for publicity?
short, Harry’s in love with someone and doesn’t care about dating
anyone else, Louis never felt home in L.A., Liam writes love songs for
someone he shouldn’t write love songs to, and Niall makes everything
better with good food.
**Oooh I reread this fic a lot! And I was there when it was just a baby. I don’t really need to say much about a green_feelings fic, do I? You already know how good it will be!!!
They meet as transfer students at university orientation, and Louis
wants Harry the first time he sees him. But Louis isn’t looking for a
boyfriend. With school and work, he doesn’t have time for anything more
than a casual hookup. When they become roommates, Louis decides it’s
best not to pursue Harry and take the chance of messing up their living
situation. They quickly become good friends and soon Louis realizes that
his attraction is much more than just physical. However, because Harry
has a plan to stay single and celibate until he graduates, Louis assumes
that he doesn’t stand a chance, and tries everything he can think of to
make himself forget about his feelings for Harry.
**Oh sweet angst! There is plenty of it here! And I love it! As Harry would say:
Happy Reading!! And Don’t forget to show the authors some love!!