• I’m the last girl on the earth and ur the last boy on the earth so ~naturally~ were supposed to end up together but as it turns out we’re both hella gay so u just wanna be best friends and hang out???
  •  [done previously but] “why do you have condoms in your survival kit” 
    • “who knows how long we’re gonna be trapped here, we may have to repopulate the earth” 
      • “boy how the fuck are condoms going to help repopulate the earth”
  • of course the world ends because of a tsunami when im literally the only adult in the world who cant swim–fuck this is so terrible, im just slowing you down with all this ‘carrying me’ shit, you gotta leave me behind
  • even as the world went to shit you were constantly my crutch with keeping me hopeful and alive when i just wanted to give up, so seeing you now, after everything intense has died down and we get a second to breathe, absolutely crumbling in front of me just really hurts my heart
    • maybe now you can lean on my shoulder, for once.
  • out of curiosity on this expedition I wanted to try this ritual that we found that’s “"supposed”“ to be hella dangerous but now crap is actually hitting the fan and you’re freaking out asking me wth happened and…..idk man everything just started shakin’ and blowin’ up–shits wild
    • looks like this expedition just turned into “let’s save the world” and you honestly could not be more pissed off that you have to go on this long ass journey with the person who unleashed hell on earth and also maybe might sorta have a crush on you
  • you’re like the human version of Pandora’s box so you have like 8 different ways you can destroy the world and me pissing you off by doing the simplest shit really makes you consider unleashing locus just so you can watch me be eaten alive
    • you know you love me though ;)