why-you-buggin

Confessed

@casualcolorstarfish: 1,5,6 and 15 prompts for Newt pleaseeeee???

Prompt(s):

  • 1. “We’re not just friends and you fucking know it.”
  • 5. “Well. Yell, scream, say something. Anything”
  • 6. “I can’t breathe”
  • 15.“Stop pretending you’re okay, cause I know you’re not.”

Warnings: none

You were best friends with Newt. Even before the Maze, you two were close despite not remembering anything before entering the Maze. When you entered the Maze the month after Newt arrived, you two were inseperable. As time passed and more Gladers showed up, everyone knew you two would end up together. It had to happen, you two got along so well and already bickered like a couple.

However, things were changing. You never admitted to yourself that you liked Newt. You always turned everyone down and told them that he was just your best friend. But after a talk with Thomas–the newest Greenie–you got to thinking.

Every time Newt came around you got butterflies in your tummy. You blushed and felt more relaxed with him. Everything was different when around him, and you two really did act like a couple already. Okay, maybe I do like him a lot… You thought to yourself. But now that you admitted it to yourself, you felt awkward. What if Newt didn’t feel the same and felt like you were coming onto him? Or simply got the wrong idea? You began to push yourself away from him in fear that you’d get rejected.

“Y/N, talk to me. Why have you been so buggin’ distant lately? I don’t like it. Is something wrong?” Newt followed you, concern in his voice.

“Nothing’s the matter, I’m okay. Honest,” you replied, picking up some clothes so you could wash them.

Stop pretending you’re okay, cause I know you’re not.” He grumbled, folding his arms over his chest.

You sighed, letting out a deep exhale. “We’re not just friends and you fucking know it.” Your tone sounded more annoyed than you wanted it to.

“What are you talking about?” He cocked an eyebrow. “I just want to know why you’ve been so… distant.”

You rolled your eyes, finally looking him in the eyes. “I like you, okay? A lot. And not as a friend. I love you more than a friend. I want you to be my boyfriend. We already act like a couple, and Greenies often think we’re already together when they first see us. God, I love you, Newt. So much, and I’ve been scared of getting rejected by you and changing our relationship forever. That’s why I’ve been distancing myself.”

Newt stood there with a shocked look. It was silent, and you were becoming paranoid. The friendship was over. He would’ve confessed his love back already if he did, but he was still standing there silent. You frowned.

Well. Yell, scream, say something. Anything!” You raised your voice, not caring if any Gladers heard this conversation.

“I love you, too.” Newt said it so quickly with such determination. You could’ve sworn you misheard him, but you knew you didn’t.

“Holy shit, I can’t breathe.” You exhaled with wide eyes. You looked down at the ground, hand pulling your fringe back.

“What?” Newt stepped closer to you, placing a hand on your shoulder. It was obvious he was concerned.

“I can’t breathe. I feel like I cannot breathe. You love me? You actually love me back? More than a friend? I… What? How? Why?–”

Newt chuckled before kissing you, cutting you off. “Maybe because I find you absolutely breathtaking, and totally badass all at the same time.” He was smiling the entire time he spoke.

“You flatter me,” you replied sarcastically.

“So, want to walk back out to everyone else and show ‘em we’re together?”

Newt offered his hand. You happily took it, and you two walked away from your spot. Once the Gladers saw the hand holding, they all thought the same thing.

It’s about time.

Bedtime

*Requested: At Bonfire, Y/N gets drunk, funny and flirting with all the boys; Thomas, Minho, Newt, and Gally agree to get you to bed but you refuse. Chuck is the only one that can convince you and you end up “tucking” him in and falling asleep in Gally’s hammock.*

You finished off your jar of Gally’s special recipe drink and knew that soon you would be drunk out of your mind. You giggled to yourself and started your round. Your round consists of going around the fire, talking to different boys.

On the other side of the fire, you weren’t aware but Newt, Minho, Thomas, and Gally were convening about you.

“She’s starting her round.” Newt laughed as the four boys watched you approach a guy.

“She’s really good though.” Minho said and Thomas nodded in agreement.

“Too good.” Gally grumbled and the other three looked at him.

“Does Gally have a CRUSH on Y/N?” Thomas teased and Gally slapped him away.

“Isn’t it hard though, carrying all that wood?” you asked and smiled flirtatiously and drunkenly at a Builder.

“Not with these.” he said and flexed, making you giggle like a little girl.

“Oh klunk, he’s flexing.” Gally complained and the other three just looked at him again.

“Do you want us to stop her?” Newt said slyly and Gally kept his eyes on you.

“Not yet. Let’s see who’s next.” he said and sat down on a log, and the others followed suit.

You approached a Gardener next, after winking to the Builder.

“Hi.” you said with a smile and he turned and his eyes lit up.

“Y/N. Hi.” he said and you two began to talk about seeds.

“And then what happens?” you asked, leaning towards him as he explained how plants grow. You pretended to listen intently, biting your lip and fluttering your lashes.

“Is she biting her lip, Gally?” Minho pointed out and Gally became flustered.

“I don’t know why you shanks are buggin’ picking on me.” he snapped and Thomas smiled.

“Because you liiiiiiiike her.” he said and Gally glared at him.

“Oh, that slinthead’s going for Frypan!” Newt cried out and laughed loudly. Gally snapped his head towards you and sure enough, you were chatting Frypan up and had a hand on his shoulder.

“Okay, party’s over.” Gally said and stood up, sauntering towards you.

“We should probably go, in case Gally attacks Y/N.” Newt said amused and Minho and Thomas followed.

“Y/N, you’re drunk. Time for bed.” Gally stated strongly and you looked at the four boys standing in front of you and Frypan.

“The party’s just BEGUN, Gally.” you said and winked at him. He grew flustered and Minho stepped in.

“You’ve had too much to drink, come on.” he said and took your arm, leading you away.

“That’s Gally’s fault.” you said, pointing at Gally.

“Yes, the slinthead made the drink, so it’s all his fault.” Newt said and the two of you laughed. You could tell Newt had been drinking too.

“Wow, Minho. Look at your arms.” you awed and Minho rolled his eyes.

“Shut it.” he said and kept walking.

“Where are we going?” you slurred and Thomas was the one to answer.

“Bed, Y/N.” he said in a tone that you could tell he was enjoying this.

“No! No no no, I haven’t talked to Winston or Zart or Gally yet!” you said and felt a hand on your lower back.

“I’m right here.” Gally said softly into your ear and you turned, throwing an arm around his neck.

“Hello.” you said and grinned.

“Get to bed.” he said and you shook your head.

“Someone get Chuck.” Newt said and Thomas jogged off towards the fire.

Chuck was always the one that you had a soft spot for. If anybody gave him klunk, you beat the slinthead for it. You love him like a little baby brother.

“Y/N.” you heard and saw Chuck standing there, cheeks red from the warmth of the fire.

“Chuck!” you said and escaped Minho’s grasp to hug him.

“Let’s get you to bed.” you said in a super sober tone and the other four boys just stared in surprise as you walked totally normally over to the hammocks and helped Chuck into his hammock.

“You should go to bed too, Y/N.” he said and you smiled at his innocence. It almost broke your heart.

“I will.” you said and pushed some of his curls out of his face and walked away, back towards the fire.

“Woah woah woah. Hold on.” Gally said and grabbed your small waist, turning you around again. He was slightly bending down so he was eye level to you.

“You have to sleep too.” he said and you stared at his face and suddenly you felt your face burning from something other than the fact that you had a lot to drink.

“We’ll leave you to it, then.” Newt said and Thomas, Minho, and Newt slapped Gally’s back before walking away. As if they had an inside secret.

Gally’s hands were still on your waist and you felt the heat from them through your clothes.

“Okay.” you said and finally broke the silence between the two of you.

“Okay.” Gally said and stood taller, his body looming over your’s. You made your way back towards the hammocks and whether you were drunk or just flustered from Gally’s eyes on you, you just chose a random hammock and lied down.

“Goodnight.” you said up to Gally and you could see the blush in his cheeks.

“Goodnight, Y/N.”

—-

You woke up with a major headache and a fuzzy mind. You fell out of your hammock and onto something warm and bumpy. Not the ground.

“Umf.” you heard and opened your eyes to see that you were lying on top of Gally.

“Gally…?” you asked in confusion and he sat up, almost letting you fall but catching your waist.

“Sorry, Y/N. You just fell asleep in my hammock last night and I didn’t know which one was your’s so-” he began and you watched as he grew flustered and you smiled.

“So you slept on the ground?” you asked and he shrugged like it was no big deal.

“Yeah, it wasn’t too bad.” he said and lifted his arm and winced.

“Your shoulders hurt?” you asked and he nodded.

“I’ll be fine. I’m a Builder.” he said proudly and you stood up.

“Too bad, I was going to offer you a massage later tonight.” you said and smiled at him.

“I’m holding you to that.” he said and stood up, brushing himself off. You winked at him before walking away.

24

Leah Rose

 

“Baby, who is she?” the woman asked.  Baby??

 

“Oh, This is one of my models at the office.  Leah.  And Leah, this is Danna… my wife.

 

“Nice to meet you. I’m Danna” she said sticking her hand out.

“Likewise” I replied as I shook her hand, “Good to see you Mr. and Mrs. Dixon” I said as I turned on my heels and headed to the bar to pay for the check.

“Let’s go” I said as I walked back to the table with Jalena

“Is something wrong?” she asked

“Sis, let’s just go home okay” I said

Jalena followed me outside to the parking lot, “I love you! Call me when you make it home okay?” Jalena said as she got into the car.

“I love you too! Will do sis!”

As I got in my car so many emotions ran through my head.

Stupid! Stupid! STUPID! Leah how could you be so stupid?! Sleeping with your boss is one thing, but a married man? Bitch you bound to get cut! What the hell is wrong with you!

 

My conscience really got the best of me as I drove home, I couldn’t think straight. I really took the cake for this one… I just HAD to have that promotion. Damn. As I walked into the house Carter, Keeis, and Mijo were sitting on the couch playing 2k.

“Hey Leah!” Keeis and Mijo said in unison

“What’s up?” I replied

“Hey Lee” Carter said lowly

“Why you buggin Carter?” I questioned

“Chill, I spoke didn’t I?” Carter shot back

“I look nothing like Sophia, so drop the bitch fit!” I snapped

Pausing the game, Carter got up and followed me into the kitchen. Not caring that his boys were in the den, Carter proceeded to yell at me.

“Look we all know I caught a measley STD! Can you cut the bullshit for once” Carter yelled

Taking a sip of water I rolled my eyes, “Carter, why do you feel the need to get all loud with your boys here?” I said lowly

“I’m not finna play these games with you Leah” Carter said shaking his head, “If you’re trying to push me, DON’T !”

Moving closer to Carter, I grabbed his shirt “Is that a threat or a promise?” I asked raising my brow

Carter chuckled, “Don’t fuck with me girl. You just don’t know” Carter said slyly walking back into the den.

“Yo, you really should lighten up” Keeis said as Carter sat down next to him

“Fuck outta here. Leah just know I’m playing with her” Carter said grabbing the controller

“Nah man, cut it out. You were mad. We may be stupid but ain’t dumb” Mijo chimed

“Look, are we gonna play the game or act like females?” Carter questioned

I shook my head as I walked upstairs to my bedroom. I couldn’t shake the feeling of what happened today. How was I supposed to know that my boss was married? James never wore a ring, nor did he have pictures of his wife on his desk at work. Sighing heavily I threw myself onto the bed and closed my eyes. I thought about every time James and I had sex, and how amazing it was. No wonder we always did at work, or in some random fancy ass hotel his ass has a WIFE at home. Why couldn’t I have just started from the bottom?! I didn’t need the promotion that bad did I? Why was I so greedy, just to get to the top? Is it really worth it?  Shaking my head at the countless thoughts and wrapping myself into my covers like a crazy person my door flew open.

“Leah!” a voice called out as I rolled off the bed

“Hmmm?” I mumbled as I tried to unravel myself out of the covers

“It’s me Keeis, what the hell are you doing?” Keeis asked as he pulled the covers off me

“Nothing!” I said as I gasped for air, I almost suffocated myself

Getting over the fact that I looked like a mummy in my covers Keeis continued, “There’s some pizza and hot wings downstairs if you want some. We’re about to watch a movie if you wanna join”

“Thanks, but it seems like guys night downstairs I’ll let ya’ll have it”

“Don’t act brand new, you know you used to be downstairs with me and Mijo while you would be all boo’d up with Carter on the loveseat” Keeis said poking me

“Cut it out!” I laughed, “But it’s not like that no more ya know?”

“I see sis, that still doesn’t mean you can’t come spend some quality time with your bro’s. Even though you and Carter aren’t together anymore, you’re still sis in law and that’s all that matters”

“alright! Alright Keeis! I’ll be downstairs in 10 minutes, let me get out of these clothes” I said getting up and shooing him out the door

“Ten minutes tops! You better come chill with us!”

“Okay Keeis! I will!” I said as I shut the door behind him

Ten minutes later I came downstairs in my usual shorts and a tank. Of course I look good in anything, so all eyes were on me. Carter, Mijo and Keeis eyed me as I grabbed a slice of pizza and some wings.

“Clearly we’re watching a movie, we didn’t say nothing about no ‘let’s chill’ type session” Keeis said implying that my outfit looked too risqué for the occasion

“I can always take my plate upstairs and watch my own movie” I said walking towards the staircase

“You know I’m just playing sis, come on!” Keeis said pulling my arm back into the kitchen

We all sat down in the den and got comfortable on the couches. Mijo and Carter sat on the couch and Keeis and I sat on the loveseat.

 

“So what are we watching?” I asked

“About Last Night” Mijo chimed

“What the hell?!” Carter exclaimed

“Look I got it from Zay house. He said it was good” Mijo said

“Are you sure Sophia didn’t-“ Mijo cut me off by giving me a ‘cut it out’ expression on his face. I could feel Carter glaring at me

“Nevermind. I heard this was a good movie” I said trying not to burst out in tears laughing

Mijo popped in the movie and we began to eat dinner.

“Just like old times ain’t it sis?” Keeis said smiling

“Haha yeah!” I said laying my feet across his lap

“What the fuck?” Keeis asked looking at me crazy

“Gimme a massage” I said eating a wing

Keeis shook his head and began massaging my feet. I laid my head on the pillow enjoying the foot massage as Kevin Hart began cracking jokes in the movie.

“You happy now?” Keeis asked 10 minutes later

“That was amazing!” I said kissing his cheek. Picking up my plate, I grabbed everyone’s trash and took it into the kitchen. Mijo noticed Carter was more quiet than usual.

“You good bro?” Mijo asked

“Yeah why wouldn’t I be?” Carter mumbled

“You silent man”

“I’m just watching the movie. Chill”

“Did you wanna rub Leah’s feet? I mean… “ Keeis said trying to be funny

“Ain’t nobody jealous of you rubbing that girl nasty ass feet!” Carter said irritated

“They were pretty clean to me” Keeis said looking at his hands

“Let’s just watch the movie ya’ll. Carter got his panties in a bunch” Mijo said as he turned his attention back to the movie

Carter sucked his teeth and continued to watch the movie. When I walked back into the den with the guys, everything was pretty quiet. The movie was pretty funny and very interesting. It’s crazy how fast people can rush into something after a one night stand. As the sex scenes between the main characters arose, I diverted my attention to my phone. Sometimes I even walked into the kitchen just because. I didn’t want to be reminded of those happy times with Carter, nor did I want to think of sex simply because of James. Mijo even noticed Carter’s distance when the sex scenes showed. Carter even checked his phone more than usual and began to fiddle with things on the table until the scene was over. 

“Yo this is the best part!” Mijo said

A comical sex scene with the other characters was showing at this time. Feeling uncomfortable, I grabbed my phone and charger and headed upstairs.

“You okay Lee?” Keeis asked

“Yeah I’m just tired, goodnight ya’ll” I said walking upstairs

“Night baby sis!” Mijo called out

Keeis looked over at Carter, “I’m kinda tired myself ya’ll. I’m gonna KO, I’ll see ya’ll in the studio tomorrow” Carter said

“Not you too! The movie was just getting good” Keeis said

“I’m  tired man. I gotta meet with the doctor in the morning anyway”

“Oh yeah, bout that clap!” Keeis said clapping his hands

“Fuck outta here man! Clean up these bottles and lock my door when ya’ll leave” Carter called out

“Aight, night!” Mijo called out as he grabbed the empty Budlight Platinum bottles. Keeis closed the door behind him

As I got ready for bed, a knock came at my door. Turning around it was Carter.

“You got a minute?” he questioned

“Sure, what’s up?” I said getting under the covers

“You know the whole comment you made earlier… about Sophia?”

“Yeah Carter I know” I said rolling my eyes

“I didn’t appreciate it”

“Okay, I’m sorry. What else?” I huffed

“Dammit Lee, I’m not in a good place right now alright”

“What’s going on?”

Carter brushed his hand through his hair and huffed, “I’m nervous. I have an appointment in the morning with the doctor”

Getting out of the bed I placed my arm on Carter’s shoulder, “It’s gonna be okay. All they’re gonna do is educate you on sex and your “issue”, give you your meds and tell you how to take them and for how long and then they’ll schedule you with a follow up and tell you to refrain from any sexual activity. It’s gonna be okay Carter” I said with reassurance

Carter walked away from me and sat on the bed, “I’ve never stopped to take the little things for what they were. I’ve never had anything like this. For the past few years you’re all I’ve ever been with and I’ve never had to worry. I know that I’ve stepped out on you, but I’ve never had a personal issue like this. This fucks with my pride”

Sighing, I placed my arms around his neck, “Carter I can’t say that I feel for you because you’ve put yourself in this situation. I don’t wanna bash you and make you feel worse than what you already feel but I don’t know what to say “ I took my arms off of him and laid down in bed.

“You don’t have to say anything” Carter said as he got under the covers with me.

“What the hell are you doing?” I questioned rudely

“I’m going to sleep, what does it look like?” Carter said laying his head in my pillow

“Wrong room! Get your butt out!” I said pushing him.

Of course Carter didn’t move, he snuggled into the covers and began to snore like crazy.

“ughh!” I huffed as I turned off the lights and turned my back towards him. Suddenly, Carter wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me closer to him. Feeling his breath against my neck I turned to face him.

“Carter”

“Yeah?”

“I promise, it’s gonna be okay. Trust me”

“I don’t wanna think about that. Let’s just go to sleep” Carter whispered. He kissed my forehead and held me close to him.  As I closed my eyes all I could think about was how stupid I was for getting myself into this messy situation with James. I’m so ready to give him a piece of my mind tomorrow morning, at this point I don’t even care if I lose my job. I want my dignity back. As I got consumed into my thoughts my heartbeat began to pick up really fast and I could feel my anxiety acting up. Gasping for breath I snatched the covers off me. Carter quickly turned on the lights and ran downstairs to give me a glass of water as I panted like crazy holding my chest.

“Your anxiety is acting up again.” Carter said as he handed me a glass of water

Taking the water, I drank it really quick and placed the glass on the nightstand. Catching my breath I burst into tears and covered my face, I couldn’t take the pain anymore.

“Leah what’s wrong?” Carter said rubbing my back.

“You wouldn’t understand Carter… just….”

“Just what Leah?” Carter said puzzled

I got up and walked to the bathroom to get some tissue and blow my nose. My eyes were so red from crying, I could feel a headache coming on at any moment.

“Leah come here” Carter said walking into the bathroom and wrapping his arms around me. “What’s wrong? You know you only have anxiety attacks when you’re worried about something”

“Carter it’s nothing” I said pulling away

“Chill out, what’s bugging you?”

Holding my head and fighting the tears, I tried pulling away from Carter. “Let’s just go to sleep. We both have to be up early in the morning” I pleaded

Carter sighed and followed me back to bed. Turning off the lights, Carter wrapped his arms around me as I stared at the ceiling. I couldn’t sleep at all. I couldn’t get James and his wife out of my head for nothing. I felt so sick I didn’t even want to be up under Carter at the moment. My eyes were so heavy from crying that I had to close my eyes, but inside I felt so restless. I tried snuggling into Carter but it just wouldn’t work.  I got out of bed and opened the door to the balcony. Maybe some fresh air could help.

“Leah?” Carter mumbled as he heard me get out of bed

“What is it?”

“Come back to bed” Carter said rubbing his eyes as the moonlight hit him

“I can’t sleep” I said staring at the bright city lights

Sighing, Carter got out of bed and took my hand, “Tell me what’s bothering you” he said as he sat me down

A flood of emotions were going through me and I didn’t know whether to smile, cry, be angry or get turned on by how much attention Carter was showing me… he looked so damn good.

“Is it something at work that’s stressing you?” he asked

I sighed, “Carter it’s no big deal”

“Leah, I know you. If it’s something that’s breaking your sleep it’s important. Shit, it’s got your anxiety acting up that’s a problem. Talk to me”

I got up and closed the balcony door. “I’m fine Carter. Trust me”

“If you’re fine, then get back in this bed and get some sleep”

I hated when Carter was right. But I couldn’t tell him what was really going on, I’m afraid of what he might do. I crawled back into bed and snuggled under the covers. This time, Carter stared at me for a moment. He brought his face close to mine, with one more movement our lips would touch. “I don’t want you to worry… about anything” he whispered. I shook my head and he got on top of me, running his fingers through my hair I could feel the adrenaline rushing through my body. As I blinked all I could think of was James, but when I opened my eyes all I could see was Carter on top of me. I don’t know if this is a dream or nightmare but my mind and body aren’t on one accord and I’m not sure how to respond to this closeness with Carter right now. I could feel my heartbeat quickening again. Carter put his hand on my heart, “Relax. I’m just… I don’t know. I don’t like seeing you like this” he said. I shook my head and stared in his eyes. My eyes filled with tears and he wiped the tears rolling down my cheeks. Carter smiled and stroked my cheek. Holding back all of my feelings, I shyly turned my back against Carter and stared at the wall. Carter turned off the lights and placed his arm around my waist once again. “Goodnight” he whispered.

 

***

The next morning I woke up and got ready for work. When I finished brushing my teeth, I got dressed in a comfortable pink maxi dress, sandals, and I threw my hair in a messy bun. Putting on my jewelry, I was startled by Carter turning over in bed.

“Getting ready for work?” he questioned

“Yeah” I replied

“Alright, I guess I’ll get up for my appointment. Let me get a hug” Carter said as he struggled to get out of bed. He got up from the bed with a bad case of “morning wood”, blushing at the sight I turned my head quickly and grabbed a purse.

“Come give me a hug” Carter said standing behind me

I giggled, “You should go brush your teeth first”

“Nah it’s cool, I’m not asking you to kiss me. Just hug me” he said with open arms.

I cringed, giving him a quick side hug; Carter pulled me in close and pulled me into him. I could feel every inch of him and as bad I didn’t mind this hug, Carter really needed to get rid of his “problem” and morning breath.

“Okay, I hugged you… go brush your teeth. I’ve gotta leave for work”

“Have a good day. I’m gonna go ahead and get ready” He said pulling away.

 

Shaking my head, I walked to the garage and got in my car. Letting the garage up I checked my phone for any text messages. Nothing new going on, locking my phone I put my car in gear and headed to work. Now is the time for me to talk to James.

 

Pulling into work, I walked into the agency building. Jenn greeted me as usual.

“Is James here?” I asked

“Yes Ms. Rose, in his office.” Jenn replied

Since James and I are more formal now, I don’t see the point in knocking on his office door anymore. Walking straight in, James looked up and greeted me.

“Rose, what’s up?” he said

“Don’t Rose me James.” I snapped. I dropped my purse in the chair and walked up to him behind his desk. “How dare you play me for a fool! What the hell is wrong with you?!”

“Leah, what’s with the hostility here?” James said in a calm voice trying to calm me down

“Cut the bullshit James. It’s bad enough that I’m fucking you. But you didn’t tell me that you were married!!” I yelled

“Lower your damn voice!” James yelled as he got up from his seat

“Don’t tell me what to do! You’re the one in the wrong here!”

“Oh… so I’m in the wrong for giving you a promotion that you didn’t deserve?” James asked folding his arms

Baffled, I rolled my eyes, “Look if I knew that you were–“

“If you knew what? That I was married? Maybe you’d be more careful?! Who cares… whether I’m married or not I still have authority over you. I am still your manager Leah.”  James said in a much louder voice than mine, attempting to shut me up by cutting me off

“James if I knew that, I wouldn’t have even gone through with this” I said looking down

James lifted my chin and stared in my eyes, “We’re in this together. Whether I’m married or not, it’s still something between us. She still doesn’t know and we’re going to keep it that way.” James said devilishly

I pulled away from James, “Look I’m not a homewrecker! So whatever we have or had is done!”

James pulled my arm, his grip was tight which hurt my arm “Just because I have a little ring on my finger, which I don’t wear you wanna throw all of this away? Huh?” I looked away from him. With his other hand, James turned my face towards his as he gripped my arm with the other “You’re already at the top baby, why would you wanna lose your promotion for some silly old ring?” James said as he pulled me into a kiss.

“I’m sure you wouldn’t wanna be on the front page of a magazine for a big Hollywood Scandal now would you?” he questioned

“No” I said looking down

“Good” James said pushing me away. “When I’m ready to stop fucking you, that’s when I’m ready. And when I’m done managing you, I’m done.  Count your blessings Rose” James stated coldly.

I huffed and grabbed my purse. “Not another word about this again. You can let yourself out” James stated as he continued writing down important business numbers.

 

Leaving James’ office was pure hell. How could he just throw me out like that? How could he sit up here and tell me “when I’m done with you, I’m done with you?” Who does he think he is? God if only his wife knew all of the things her husband does to me. If I didn’t feel like shit now, I feel even worse than that. How can I continue to see this man after all he’s put me through… I mean he’s given me a bomb ass promotion. I’m on top of my game, I’m getting GREAT sex, and I have enough money to do whatever I want when I want. The only thing in my way is that ring, he doesn’t even wear it so technically he isn’t really married. Maybe… maybe he and Danna are separated and she got jealous when she saw me so she just wanted to throw the “we’re married” card ya know?  Who am I kidding? A ring’s a ring! Carter and I talked about getting married once, but his unfaithful ways kept me from even walking into a jewelry store to perhaps look at a ring. As I got in my car, I tried to clear my thoughts of everything before hitting the road. Lord knows I don’t need to be driving with all of this baggage on my mind.

 

Carter Brown

Leah was right, my doctor’s visit wasn’t that bad. He explained everything just like Leah said. I’d be on medication for at least 2 weeks and then a follow up, as long as I take this medicine and refrain from any sexual contact then I’m good to go. Shit still sad though, I never thought I’d be hit with something like this. I never imagined for things to go sideways, who knows Zay could have something… I have no clue if Sophia is ever going to get checked. All I know is, I’m ready to get rid of this shit, and I’m ready to get back in the saddle; but with more caution this time. Last night was crazy, it’s crazy I didn’t wanna be with my boys. All I could think about was Leah and as soon as they left I couldn’t help but wanna be alone with her. Although she works the hell outta my nerves she also has her good moments; she knows just what to say. But I don’t know what’s going on with her; she had a really bad anxiety attack. I know something’s bothering her, she can’t hide it from me. Pulling into the house I grabbed my keys and unlocked the door. The den was dark, but a strong scent of weed hit my nose. I saw a silhouette on the couch and a bottle on the table. Turning on the lights, Leah sat there inhaling the smoke and blowing it out. Next to the broken down weed all over the table was a bottle of vodka. Her eyes were red and her posture slumped. Her bun was still messy and her makeup still beautiful as ever; she hadn’t changed clothes from when I saw her before she left work. I decided to sit next to her.

“Let me get that from you” I said taking the blunt from her hand

She scoffed and crawled over me to get the blunt out of my hand. I could tell Leah was really crossfaded. She could hardly speak, she looked like a beautiful zombie. Damn I missed the days we would get high together, but it’s rare she ever gets like this and something definitely isn’t right. To top it all off, she’s drinking vodka straight, damn this girl must be going through something.

She laid her head on the couch, she stared at me as I looked in her bloodshot red eyes. “You need to chill out, what’s wrong with you?”

 

She cleared her throat and whispered, “I just… need a… release” she said slumping over into my lap to get the blunt. She didn’t quite make it though, her head fell straight into my lap.

“Leah get up!” I said trying not to pull her by her hair, she rose slowly and climbed over me and snatched the blunt. Inhaling it, she shotgunned the smoke into my lungs; I pulled away in time so that we wouldn’t kiss and I looked back at her. “Lee, whatever you got going on, you can talk to me”

“You wouldn’t understand” she said shaking her head. Taking a sip of the vodka she took her hair out of the bun, “It’s nothing important Carter. Just leave it be!” she struggled to raise her voice

“You’re gonna be an alcoholic, and a weed head.” I chuckled, “Leave all the bad habits to me, now how can I help you? I don’t like seeing you like this Lee. I’m begging you to tell me”

“Why should I trust you?” she said standing up, her stance was pretty shaky but she held herself up pretty good. “You can’t even be honest with me about cheating! But yet you want me to tell you why I haven’t been myself. Carter please! If you had the last dick on earth I still wouldn’t suck it!” The liquid courage was really getting to her, and the stuff she was saying didn’t make any sense. I guess now really isn’t the best time to talk about anything; this isn’t a good release for her. Not for anyone to be quite honest.

“Let’s go upstairs, I’ll put you to bed and whenever you need anything I’ll bring it to you” I said taking her hand.

Slapping my hand away, Leah plopped down on the couch and laid down, “NO! I’m gonna stay right here” she demanded.

“Okay fine, but I’m not leaving you” I said laying her head on my shoulder.

Climbing on top of me, Leah sat in my lap and laid her head on my chest. She began to move like crazy and I found that she was removing her dress. I guess she’s hot from the liquor.

“Lee let me get you a shirt or something” I said as I tried to get up.

“Nooo” she whined in a groggy voice

The front door began to open, in walked Mijo. Damn I’ve got to change the locks on this door.

“Hey bro! Oh shit! What the hell is going on?” Mijo said as he walked in on me holding Leah… naked.

“I’ll explain later, can you go upstairs to my room a grab a shirt for me!” I questioned

“Sure… what’s with all the weed and vodka?” Mijo questioned

“Just go upstairs and hurry!” I commanded

Leah looked up at me, her eyes red and glossy. She stroked my cheek and slightly smiled.

“Here’s the shirt!” Mijo said coming downstairs, “Damn girl you look high as hell!”  Mijo exclaimed as he looked at Leah

“Shut up!” I yelled as Leah was trying to move and see who was talking to her. I quickly slipped the shirt over her head, so that she wouldn’t flash Mijo.

“I’m sorry. What’s going on?”

“I don’t know, I just came home and found her in the dark like this.”

“You came home and found Leah naked?”

“Nah, she was just stoned and drunk. She just got naked as you walked in”

“Damn. “

“Look, I think it’s best if you come back another time okay”

“That’s cool bro, let me know how she’s doing”

“Leave my key on the counter.”

“Damn! Aight… bye Carter” Mijo said putting the key on the counter and leaving.

As Mijo left, I looked back over at Leah. I hated that she’s done this to herself whatever it is that’s bothering her it’s really taking a toll on her. She moved to my other shoulder to get more comfortable, but I couldn’t wait anymore I had to know what was bothering her.

“Leah, talk to me babygirl”

“About what?” she said as her eyes started to close

“Look at me” I said holding her head up and staring in her eyes, “Tell me what’s wrong”

“Nothing… I’m just… chillin” she said in a slurred voice

“Leah, I can’t help you if you don’t talk to me”

Leah sat up and brushed her hair back she tried to maintain her composure as much as she could. “Carter if you knew, you wouldn’t even want me around. It’s best if you don’t know” she said

“I can help you Leah”

She put her face against mine, I could spell the liquor on her breath. She put her hand over my heart and breathed deeply. “It’s best if you don’t know. I can handle it”

“I don’t want to see you go through this. At least not alone” I said holding her waist. “Just let me be here for you”

“Carter, I can’t” she said as tears formed in her eyes. “If I told you, it would be the end of everything and I can’t risk that” she said holding my face

“Trust me, it wouldn’t. Just talk to me”

She sighed and looked at me. “Are you sure you can handle it?”   I nodded, waiting for Leah to continue.     "I’m…”  she muttered suddenly.     “Your… what?” I asked her as Leah stared at me.  Suddenly her face started to turn red, and then she gagged.     Oh lord.  Just as I expected Leah gagged once more before throwing up all up in my lap.     “Oh hell nah,” I said and grabbed Leah’s drunk ass and placed her beside me.     “Shit.. Carter I’m so sorry!”  Leah said frantically as she got up from her seat.     “Well don’t just stand there.  Clean this shit up!” I said growing pissed by the minute.  This girl really just threw up on me.   God this is so nasty.     “Ok, I’ll go get something to clean you up,” Leah said as she hurried out the room.     Why did I have to care so much?