pidge: keith i have a gay problem and need the help of a gay who is more experienced
keith: ok. what is it?
pidge: i like this girl but there’s no way she likes me back and i dunno what to do about it
keith: nothing. absolutely nothing. you do nothing, and then you do your best to ignore it but it’s just eating at you and it’s so hard to pretend it’s not there so then you watch ten thousand heteronormative hallmark movies but eventually you start getting daydreams about how great your life would be if you actually were dating and how much fun you’d have doing the cheesiest coupley stuff and you aren’t even paying attention to the hallmark movies anymore they’re just lights and sounds in the background of your daydreams but we’re in space so you don’t even have the hallmark movies so you just go straight to the daydreams and you get this idea in your head that if you two date you’ll finally be a happy functional person and you won’t have any more problems ever and you know that’s not true but you still wanna believe it anyway and now the crush is getting bigger and bigger and you’re even more of a mess and you talk to your friend about it since he says he’s always there if you need someone to listen so you think that’ll help a little bit but it turns out it doesn’t because your friend is an asshole and says “well why don’t you just tell him?” but if i could tell him then this wouldn’t. be a problem, shiro!
Imagine Person A is dragged to a concert of a band they’ve never heard of by their friend, Person C. Together, they get to the show early, so Person A breaks off from C for a while to get away from the commotion of the fans waiting to get into the building. Person A ends up wandering around till they accidentally run straight into a stranger aka Person B. Person A feels so bad that they ran into B and starts apologizing profusely while B keeps saying it’s ok. They strike up a conversation together and B asks for A’s phone number. Later, once A is back with C and the concert is starting, A sees B walk onto the stage. Finally, they realize that Person B is the lead singer of the band.
im wheezing bc tony didnt ask to be a part of this all he wants is 2 be happy with his tapes & his boyfriend but instead he got sucked into it all because he’s old fashioned and still uses cassette tapes :’(
nina and matthias never have that moment where they realize they’re on the same side and therefore can’t trust each other
by some miracle they make it out of the ice court alive without nina having any parem
wylan never finds the courage to stand beside jesper on the way home because he’s too shy in his own skin
without the promise of reward for the scientist inej doesn’t consider her dream of hunting slavers possible, which means she never tells kaz so he has no reason to ask her to stay in ketterdam with him, and inej goes on thinking he doesn’t have deeper feelings for her
they go back to the barrel empty handed and their friendships never strengthen and most importantly to kaz—they never make their millions
pekka, heleen and van eck are still at large
kaz never gets the help he needs to find inej’s parents
there’s really no reason to work with wylan again since raske is better with demolition after all and they’re not working with jan anymore
jesper’s life lacks chaos without any big heists and he goes back to gambling regularly
and poor matthias
he still meets his fate the same way when it’s found out he’s not in hellgate anymore. but the sad difference is it would have all been for nothing….
spoiler: it’s just not realistic.jpg stop acting like the story could exist without him. he’s a crucial character thanks bye