Christmas with you. Chapter 4

Originally posted by tzuwice

Gif not mine

 Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3

Summary: Christmas, the time of the year when you have to go back home and see your family. Maybe it won’t be that bad this year. I mean you meet your high school crush and you finally go to a date after few years. 23 days’ till Christmas, 26 days ‘till you leave your childhood hometown. Is this just a fling or something more serious.

 It was morning and Your mother wanted to make breakfast for you and she carried a tray with pancakes and hot chocolate to your room. She saw you and Jackson cuddling, she just smiled placed the tray on your bedside table and left, but you woke up when she left. You saw the tray with food and then you felt Jackson’s hands around your waist. “Good morning~” he whispered in deep husky voice. “Why did you spent the night here?” you asked. Jackson lifted his head “You fell asleep and just looking you so peacefully sleeping made me tired.” he yawned.

Jackson left to go home so now you were stuck with your family. Of course Jackson gave his phone number before he left.You and Mark played video games in his room but someone called Mark. Mark spoke  with the person and when he hung up he just smiled. “Who was it?” you asked. Mark sighed and laughed “Jinyoung. He said that he is coming over.” Mark said. You stopped playing “No, this was supposed to be our day. We only meet once a year and you are not paying attention to me.” you almost yelled. Mark’s smile disappeared and he rubbed his forehead “Y/N, Jinyoung and I are getting married, so that means we are going to spend time together. Why don’t you just grow up and act like a supportive sister?” Mark’s voice had a lot of disbelieve in it. “Mark, I love you because you are my brother but…I don’t like Jinyoung. He’s an ass kisser.” you said. Mark laughed but it was’t like haha you are funny laugh it was irritated and pissed of laugh. “So he wants to get along with everyone. Maybe you should try it.” he said. “Oh wait you can’t because you want to be a bitch!” he yelled. His face was red from the yelling. Of course you and Mark fought a lot but he never called you a bitch, a brat? yes. An idiot? Yes. But never a bitch. You shook your head and got up from the floor. “I can’t argue with you every year. I just can’t.” you said and left.

You called Jackson and asked for his address. You stood in front of Jackson’s house and knocked the door. You hated the feeling you had, you kind of wanted to go back and apologize from Mark but you were too proud. As soon as Jackson opened the door you bursted into tears. Jackson took you into his arms and patted your back. He didn’t talk he just let you to calm down.

Don’t be afraid to make mistakes in class. Maybe on stage it is different, but class is for pushing yourself and trying new things. If you did 2 pirouettes yesterday, do 3 pirouettes today. If you did 3 pirouettes yesterday, do 4 today. That is why you wake up in the morning - you cannot just keep doing 2 pirouettes and being satisfied with that. So do not be afraid to fall. If you make mistakes, I will correct you. That is why I’m here, that is why you come to class.
—  Alexander Filipov, last week in class

this edit is gross & i’m not even at 10k yet but i’m close enough & it’s my birthday tomorrow & i felt like making a follow forever so !

squad: i love u guys a lot whether we talk every day or once a month u still mean a lot 2 me

camilascabello symptomshoe jadelust zaynmalikvevos normila cutestheaux michael5sos grandehoe 420normani tylerhochlin tiredblackgirl norrmanikordei


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champagnepadre dilaurentisfields dvlanobrien perrieeele getvveird

Recently I’ve been struggling to drink more water, I’m not sure why but I’ve finally found a way of making sure I’m getting enough water and I guess I seem to forget that every system and function that goes on in my body needs water.

  • Did you know though? One in 5 women drink less than the recommended daily intake of water.

I’ve started to up my intake of water, I’ve increased my intake up to 3 litres a day, because as it is getting hotter and I’m working out in the heat, I need to make sure that my body is able to function properly. 

So I decided to make sure that when I get up in the morning, I make sure I’ve finished at least ½ of a one litre bottle (especially as I don’t tend to wake up in the night and my body is probably dying of thirst) and then  I will eat my breakfast. And that rule I find applies for both lunch and dinner. I find that when I drink my water before I have breakfast, I tend to control my portions better, and I don’t end up with a giant mountain for breakfast. I’m making sure eat enough, including snacks, but if I’m hungry I tend to cook more for breakfast. 

Top tips for increasing your intake: 

  • I’ve started stocking my fridge full of fruit infused water, making sure there are a variety of combinations to make sure that I don’t get bored. Currently my favourite is frozen watermelon chunks, they add the greatest flavour in the world!
  • If you like spicy food, then this can be another way of increasing your water intake, because if you’re eating spicy food, you tend to reach for the water a lot. And spicy food helps your metabolism! 
  • Apps. Yes there are actually apps for your phone that remind you to drink water. Apps like waterlogged and water your body allow you set alerts for your phone. 
  • Water filters, you don’t need these, however I know some of my family do prefer to drink their water filtered. It’s not essential but it’s an option for you. 
  • Take water with you, so if you’re at work, have water on your desk, I take a bottle in my handbag literally everywhere I go, keep a bottle beside your bed, next to your computer, anywhere you’re likely to go on a day to day basis. It then stops you from reaching for the soda or fizzy drinks. (Everything in moderation though, I’m not say don’t drink fizzy drinks, every once in a while though)
  • When you work out, take a huge bottle, I usually have a 2 litre bottle of water with me when I work out, however if you’re running outside, there are specific bottles that can help you when you’re running.
  • When you go out for dinner, drink water, it will not only reduce your bill in the end, but there is nothing wrong with having one drink of lemonade or fizzy drink, but then having a pitcher of water on the table!
  • Eating foods that are filled with water, so things like cucumber, melon, celery, lettuce, all of those are high in water, so that another way of increasing your intake of water. 
  • Take baby steps, if you’re struggling to drink even one glass of water and you try to drink 2 litres of water straight off, then it can end up making you feel bad for not being able to drink all that water. So gradually increase it, so if you’re drinking one small glass a day, increase that to 2, and so on. You can do it!
  • Make it a habit, when I first started drinking water I hated the taste of it, but changing up the water and giving it a bit of flavour at least to start off with can really help you! Now I drink water straight from the tap, but it just takes time. 

photocredit: http://www.businessnewsdaily.com/images/i/000/004/354/i02/water-bottles.jpg?1378931297

5SOS Preference #2 - Fighting


You and Ashton barely fought so when you did fight, it was loud. Voices would raise and you would be screaming at each other until the early hours of the morning.

“You have no idea how annoying you can be, do you?!” Ashton screamed at you, as you clenched your fists by your sides. “I do everything I do to keep you happy and you just throw it back in my face!”

You recoiled at the snappy tone, the snarky remark. You couldn’t believe that this is where the argument had gone, in fact you couldn’t really remember why you were arguing in the first place. All you knew was that it was a slow build up over the day, him making some remark when he got in, sending you over the edge.

“I do not! But I am not your stay at home wife Ashton, I have my own life but you wouldn’t know that because you never care enough to ask about it!” You screamed back, sick of him thinking everything was about him. You had to speak sometimes as well.

His face went red, his fists clenching by his side, before he spun around and walked towards his studio. You kicked the sofa in frustration, sitting down and ignoring the loud banging of the drums. You didn’t know when you and Ashton had got to this point, you both knew everything that had been said was complete rubbish; no-one cared about you like Ash did, and he didn’t believe you were taking him for granted.

A couple of hours later, you were lying in bed trying to sleep over the loud banging but with no luck.

You slid out of bed, wrapping your blanket around your shoulders and creeping up to the studio. You knocked shyly, knowing if he was still angry it wouldn’t be worth your time.

You entered and saw him facing away from you on his drum kit as he kept smashing the kit in front of him. He finished the run he was doing and chucked the drum sticks down before laying his head on the kit.

“I’m sorry.” You whispered, making him jump at your presence.

“So am I.” He replied, turning on his stool to look at you, his face sweaty and the bags under his eyes so prominent.

“Do you wanna come to bed?” You smiled slightly, and he nodded coming over to you and kissing you softly.



Calum shut down when you two argued. He refused to acknowledge you or any problem, instead just ignoring you.

He hated arguing with anyone, especially the love of his life, but he was stubborn and he just wanted you to see where he was coming from. He hated being told he was wrong, even when he knew he was.

He slept on the couch without being asked, he just did it because he wanted to prove to you that you were in the wrong as well. Every morning you would walk downstairs and there he would be, curled up uncomfortably on your too small couch, his legs dangling over the end.

“Why can’t you just fight back?” You whispered, talking to yourself more than to him. “I want you to show me you care, but you just stop.”

You felt lost when Calum shut down like that, the whole point of your argument was how you didn’t like how he acted in public. He never held your hand around people, never even a peck on the cheek. If the public didn’t know better they would think you were just friends.

“I just want to know you still love me.”

But what you didn’t know was that Calum was cutting himself off from you on purpose, afraid if he didn’t he would push you even further away. His fear of losing you stronger than his fear of arguments. He knew if he lashed out, his words would send you running for miles. He knew he’d never see you again.

“I do still love you, Y/N.” he whispered back, his voice hoarse from not talking for so long. “That’s the problem.”

You were taken aback, but instead of saying anything you just crawled up next to him on the sofa and buried your head in your chest.

“What’re you so afraid of?” You murmured, begging for an answer. And he told you.


Luke never raised his voice around you, in fact you didn’t think he raised his voice full stop unless out of a joke. So, when he came home, temper running high from a frustrating day at the studio, you didn’t know how to cope with it.

He ignored you when he walked through the door, instead of opting to go upstairs and lock himself in your room. You decided to leave him to it, knowing that’s what he usually wanted, but after an hour he came storming downstairs.

“Why isn’t there anything to eat?” he grumbled at you, making you raise your eyebrows at him.

“Because you haven’t made anything?” you shot back, already annoyed at the tone.

“You’ve been sat down here for an hour doing fuck all then?” he muttered, making you roll your eyes at him.

“Go back upstairs and sort your attitude out and then maybe we’ll talk.” You told him. You weren’t used to him talking to you like that ever, so you didn’t really know what to do.

He scoffed at you. “You’re not my fucking mother, so stop acting like it. You’re supposed to be my girlfriend.”

You were shocked, having no idea what he had meant by that, but whatever it was it was a blow to the stomach. “You can go stay with her tonight then.” You whispered, trying to keep your voice from shaking.

You avoided his eyes as you walked upstairs and shut yourself in your room, leaning against the door to stop him from following you. You tried not to cry, you wanted to believe you were stronger than that, but Luke had hit a sore point.

“Y/N, baby, I’m sorry.” He called through your door and you could hear the pleading in his voice but it wasn’t enough to open the door. “Come on, please, talk to me.”

“Go away Luke.”


Your relationship with Michael was toxic from day one. You both argued constantly, but soon made up minutes later. When he was away they got worse, cheating accusations being thrown left, right and centre. You were both proud people, never wanting to admit you were in the wrong.

But you were like magnets, always being pulled back to each other no matter what. You couldn’t stay away from each other no matter how much you tried. There was something about your relationship with Michael that had you begging for more every time. You couldn’t let him go.

But when your phone flashed with his number this afternoon, he was the last person you wanted to talk to. He’d been out in England, his arms hanging round several different girls and quite clearly touching their butts, all whilst you were stuck at home, scrolling through the endless pictures.

You ignored the call, sending it to voicemail and curling yourself further up in your duvet. You were trying to think of the reason you were still with him and you were coming up short, neither of you trusted each other and were always sending snide remarks straight to each other, almost by the hour. There was nothing left of the relationship you thought you’d built.

But you couldn’t remember the time where there was trust. Your relationship was built on lies and deceit.

You saw your phone light up with a message, indicating Michael had left a voicemail.

You pressed play, expecting random apologies and excuses, insisting it wasn’t him.

“Y/N, I know you’ve seen the pictures, I’m not stupid and I just want to say, well, I’m sorry.” He mumbled into your ear and it was a shot to your heart. Michael never apologised for the pictures or for the girls, because he insisted he never did anything wrong.

“No.” You whispered, pulling his number up and calling it.

“Y/N-” he answered, but you cut him off.

“You fucking bastard.” You told him, your hands shaking and tears running down your cheeks. “After everything we’ve been through Michael, you fucking twat.”

“I know and I am so sorry baby, I didn’t think, I was angry from our argument and I fucked up.” He pleaded with you down the phone and you felt like you were going to throw up.

You gulped, taking a deep breath. “I loved you Michael. I never thought you would actually do it.”

“I regret everything I ever did last night, I should have called you but instead I-”

“You fucked some chick.” You filled in for him. “You know what Michael?”

Silence on his end.

“Fuck you.”

(A/N: sorry Michael’s took an unexpected turn!)

Day 41-60 Journal Writing Challenge

Day 41-60 Journal Writing Challenge

Day 41: Song Lyrics
Find lyrics to one song you enjoy listening to. Then choose a verse or line to help you start your writing. (Time: 2-5mins)

Day 42: Excuses
List the excuses you keep hearing from people or your own excuses you keep telling to people. Then answer this question: Why do people make excuses and not tell the truth to others?

Day 43: Funeral
This is a writing exercise that I did in my English class last semester. So, in this page, write about what you want your loved ones to do or song(s) you can play during your funeral.

Day 44: Holiday
Write about your favorite holiday. And if you could create your own holiday, what would you celebrate?

Day 45: Describe
Describe your typical morning, afternoon, and evening.

Day 46: Yourself
Pretend that you see yourself walking into a room. What’s your first impression of yourself?

Day 47: Spoofs
Write a list of spoofs. Choose a title of a movie or book and write several spoofs of that title.

Day 48: Opinions
Write an opinion about teen pregnancy, gun violence, sex, or anything

Day 49: Three Things
Throughout the day take note of three things that you see in front of you.

Day 50: Stress
How do you deal with stress?

Day 51: Made Up Story
Write a made up story that begins with your character peering out from behind a curtain

Day 52: Best Friend
Write about your best friend. Has he/she ever talk about you behind your back? Is he/she a good best friend?

Day 53: Parents
Write about your parents. Are they strict or easy going? What are the lectures you keep hearing from them?

Day 54: 4 years ago
How old were you four years ago? Describe some things you can do now that you could not do then.

Day 55: Money Savings
Describe several ways a person your age can earn money

Day 56: Review
Watch a short film or any video on YouTube and write a review about it

Day 57: Websites
List 5 favorite websites you often visit. Write about why you frequently visit the websites

Day 58: Poem
Read Robert Frost poem titled “The Road Not Taken”.  Name a road you’ve always wanted to travel.  Where do you hope it takes you, and what might you see on the way?

Day 59: First Time
I think this is continuous to Day 5 of first journal writing challenge. In this page, write about your first feeling about that time you had your first kiss, car, work, or date etc.

Day 60: A Page of Nonsense
Put anything thar doesn’t make sense here on this page. (A picture, book, magazine article etc)

Tabimatsu: Karamatsu’s Ambition Story 1

have I ever mentioned how much I hate translating karamatsu’s lines? not only do I have to figure out his ridiculous english, but he also uses these really complicated japanese words (as part of his painful personality) and I constantly have to go back to my dictionary just to look up his useless vocabulary. then once I know what he’s saying, I have to overexert my brain trying to figure out how to translate his sentences in a way that isn’t completely awkward. it makes me feel incompetent. fucking shittymatsu.

so why am I doing this, you ask? because oh boy I saw karamatsu’s ambition story 2 this morning and I have so much to say about it, I no longer care about the fact that merely translating his words put me through pain. and it’d feel kind of wrong if I just did story 2 without doing story 1 first so here we are.

you’re welcome.

**asterisks represent shitty English

Karamatsu: I’ve saved a considerable amount of money. I’ve searched under the vending machine.

Keep reading

Astray -Part 3-

-Requests Closed-

Your name: submit

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me

Part 1 | Part 2 I Part 4 I Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 I Part 8 I Part 9 I Part 10 I Part 11 I Part 12 I Part 13 I Part 14 I Part 15 I Part 16 | Part 17 | Part 18 | Part 19 | Part 20 | Part 21 | Part 22 | Part 23 | Part 24 | Part 25 | Part 26 | Part 27 | Part 28 | Part 29

It was the crack of dawn, when the sky looked like a skillfully painted canvas. The dolce shades of pinks and blues welcomed you with the peaking of the morning sun.

To anyone else, it was a beautiful morning. One that would make a person smile. But to you.. You hated mornings. You couldn’t understand why anyone would like waking up early or at least before 11am. Alas, you stupidly picked your classes to be early, thinking about how you already woke up early in high school and this shouldn’t be any different.

It was worse.

“It should be illegal to wake up this early..” You grunted to yourself, taking sleepy steps to your bathroom. You did your daily routine, brewing yourself a cup of coffee because you definitely need it.

You went to the window of your apartment, opening it to get a better view of the sky. No matter how much you hated waking up early, the early morning sky was always beautiful to you.

You took small sips of your coffee, the bitter taste was hard for you to choke down. You closed your eyes, hearing a voice. A singing voice.

You didn’t say anything just listened to the sweet voice. The voice was gentle and calming, you could listen to this voice all day. They stopped, shutting their windows closed and went back to your kitchen. You checked your watch, grabbing your bag before racing out the door only to bump into someone one’s back.

“I might be wearing black, but I’m not invisible.”

“Sorry.. And about a few days ago, I wanted to know..”

“Aren’t you going to be late? It’s 8:25.”

“Oh, shoot. I am.” You ran off, leaving your sentence hanging and getting to the bus stop. How could you be so stupid? He managed to get out of telling you his name again. He had that same grin on his face, was it out of realization that he tricked you once again? Next time you see him, you’re going to get his name.

“Number 0127!”


“Almost late, Miss 0127.”

“Sorry, professor.” You took a seat next to a girl with her headphones on, her music was a bit noisy but you were in no position to judge.

“Now, this class is only for those who know this is the path they’ve chosen. That art is what they want to do-” He walked in, out professor staring at him before he took a seat.

He didn’t say anything to him and continued with his speech. Your professor scolded you for almost being late but he’s 30 minutes late and all he got was a short stare?

“Now, all of you take out a pencil and paper will be going around. Draw something, anything as long as it is appropriate. Everyone will hand me back their drawings and we will do this every day this semester.”

“Ugh.” The girl next to you muttered under her breath and she tapped you.

“You gotta an extra pencil?”

“Yeah, here.”

“Thanks. Oh, I’m Mina by the way.”


“Cute name.”

“Thank you..” You replied and she smiled at you. The blank page in front of you reminded you of the task at hand and you began to just wonder.

Your mind went back to the voice you heard this morning, how sweet and mellow it sounded. It complimented the beautiful early morning sky and your hands went to work. You have bought pencil crayons as it was the first day of elementary school but the blend of every colour of the sky that you could remember was worth possible mockery.

“Miss 0127?”

“Sorry, professor.”

“I’ll take it to him.”

“Thanks.” She took both pages to him, walking back to her seat next to you and your professor began his lecture on art history. It was boring as hell, you should have known considering it has the word ‘history’ next to art.

You could imagine his next lecture just being on your favourite and you would still fall asleep. Mina grumbled about the class with you, you two making comments the whole time to keep you both awake.

In the corner of your eye, you saw someone get up and leave. He just walked out and the professor droned on until dismissal.

“That was so boring.”

“It’s too bad I need this credit.”


“What do you have next?”

“Intro to Media Arts.”

“Drawing 1.”

“Lucky you, your class is just upstairs.”

“I’ve got to get go before I get scolded for almost being late again.

“Wait, give me your number. You seem like cool.”

“Trust me, I’m the biggest dork you’ll ever meet.”

“You can’t top Namjoon on that, Y/N.”

“Wait, you know Namjoon.

“Yeah, he’s my twin brother.”

“But you seem cool and not…that.” You saw him walking through the hall with his parade of girls before he stopped in front of you two.


“I hate being related to this.” She poked his cheeks as he hugged her and he stared at you. He pulled away from his sister, stepping in front of you and continuing to maintain eyes contact with you.

“What’s your name, peach?” His deep voice made you rub your palms together and your cheeks burn.


“You have a cute name, Y/N. I’m-”

“Going to make her and myself late if I keep talking to her, yes. Maybe you are a genius. Come on, Y/N.” Mina pulled you along with her and you looked back to see Namjoon still staring at you while biting his lip. The parade surrounded him once again and you stopped when Mina did.

“As much as I tolerate my brother, he’s kinda of a douchebag. I could tell he was going to try and turn into one of his girls.”

“He didn’t seem that bad..”

“Trust me, Y/N.”


“Go in before your professor gives you an earful.” You said a quick goodbye before entering the studio. The room was filled with easels that held blank canvases.

“Miss Y/N. Pick your canvas.” You walked over to a canvas by the window and rested your bag against the wall. She stood in the middle and you were amazed by her. The way she spoke with passion about drawing and its techniques, it made you want to follow in her footsteps.

“Ah, I thought you would at least come early for my class.” He just shook his head at our professor and took an empty spot in the back next to a window as well.

He passed you, your eyes glancing at the side profile of him and you could have sworn he was smiling again. There was a twitch in his beanie that only God could explain but you couldn’t miss it.

It was twitching.

“Now, if you haven’t noticed already, there are not any supplies laid out anywhere in this room. If you noticed, good on you, if not, the more you know,” the next question that was on everyone’s mind based on the looks of their faces was also answered.

“You don’t need them, at least not yet.”

“But why?”

“To truly understand the power within that pencil, paintbrush, charcoal, whatever medium you use, you need to know purpose. Why do we use them? How does knowing that go towards the betterment of our work? These questions must be answered first, Ga Yoon.”

“Yes, professor.”

“Now, onto the fun stuff, lecture time.” You all collectively groaned while she smiled at you. Although she talked for about two hours, you hadn’t notice until he was pushing you.

“Earth to neighbour!”


“Class is over, Ms. Rambler.”

“My name is Y/N.

“What’s gotten into you?”

“Sorry for being so rude. I’m just really tired and this day just can’t seem to get any shorter-”


“Sorry.” You bit your lip, looking down like a child that had just been scolded by their parent and he pulled your chin up.

“You say that a lot, Y/N.”


“It’s cute, don’t worry about it.”


“See you around, neighbour.” He grinned at you, walking out of the class and you went after him only to see an empty hallway with no sign that he was even there.

Great, now he knows your name. 

This was a cat and mouse and game and guess who’s the mouse?

Feedback is appreciated ^w^

~Admin Blake

some oisuga headcanons
  • it’s apparently canon that suga makes bad puns in his head but what if he tells oikawa
  • oikawa: flashes peace sign in every photo
  • “oikawa do you make the peace sign because you’re TOOru hahaha get it 2-ru”
  • oikawa: stops flashing peace sign
  • in the early morning when oikawa watches volleyball matches he completely loses his brain-to-mouth filter so he tends to say more curse words than usual
  • suga sometimes keeps him company. he picks up the habit from oikawa
  • daichi: 
  • karasuno:
  • noya: *giddy laughter*
  • suga brings oikawa’s nephew takeru snacks like pocky and choco pie whenever he and oikawa pick him up from school
  • takeru lowkey adores suga
  • suga teases oikawa that takeru is his favorite
  • so oikawa sulks, and when he sulks, his nose scrunches
  • suga tiptoes to kiss the nose scrunch
  • suga tiptoes to kiss IN GENERAL
  • sometimes when tooru is in a really petulant mood he raises his chin up so suga can’t reach his lips, even on tiptoe
  • so suga goes for his neck!
  • oikawa flushes red. why does he do this to himself
  • oikawa being the only person allowed to call suga by his first name (literally because he forced his way in I mean kou-chan? probably canon if we let this happen)
  • height difference + CUDDLING

“Why did you bring me out here, Damon? It’s 2 in the morning” Matt groaned. “Really? My watch must be fast, I thought we could watch the sun rise together” Damon said sarcastically, rolling his eyes at Matt. “You can’t be serious for one moment Damon” you laughed as you stepped out from the shadows. You saw the smirk on Damon’s lips and as you turned to look at Matt, his face was in utter shock. “Y/N?!” he asked, figuring he must have been seeing things. “Hi Matty” you smiled sweetly. He looked at Damon quickly and then back to you. “I thought you were dead” he said, eyes becoming watery. “I am” you nodded. “Sort of” you sighed. “What?” he asked, more confusion setting in on top of ever other emotion he was feeling. “She was dying…” Damon started, making Matt’s attention fall on him. “She was attacked, I smelt the blood, she was slipping quickly. I fed her my blood, but I knew that there was a slim chance of it healing her, so I had to turn her” Damon explained. Silence filled the air as everything sunk in. “You’re a vampire” Matt said, sad eyes on you once again. You nodded, swallowing the lump in his throat. “Damon helped me adapt. I’m still Y/N, just without a heartbeat” you laughed softly. Matt bit his bottom lip holding back his tears, he turned to Damon and pulled him into a hug. “Thank you man” he said, pulling away. Damon smiled at him and patted his back. Matt jogged over to you, letting the tears fall as he smiled at you widely, reaching you he wrapped his arms around you tightly and whispered “I love you” 

Random Phone Calls (I am tired)
  • <Judy> Nick? Why did you call it's like 2 in the morning?!
  • <Nick> Hi, yes I still require attention.
  • <Judy> What d-
  • <Nick> Attention level: low, not good for my health. In critical condition, might die.
  • <Judy> nIC-
  • <Nick> Might not make it, y don't u love me, what did I do to deserve this?
  • <Judy> You just can't last 6 hours without me, can you? Well neither can I.
  • <Nick> Yes. Attention level replenished, can sleep now.
  • <Judy> Goodbye slick.
  • <Nick> Goodbye Jude.

i think beth was the first to say i love you. i imagine her being stressed and on the edge of tears knocking on alison’s door at 2 am in the morning. i imagine alison asking if everything was okay and beth just begging her to hold her until the night went away, both of them kissing on the couch, touching lightly each other’s waists, alison saying how wrong was it, beth not caring. both of them looking at each other’s eyes, making love, beth holding her so close just to feel her heartbeat, and then when everything is quiet, she says it “i love you.” and alison doesn’t know what to say and just shimmies away and says she can’t because she’s married and the kids and she just can’t let all of that go away. 

and beth cries and tells her it’s okay that she just needed to say so because it was killing her. and they sleep together and when the morning arrives beth’s gone and she leaves a note behind saying “just remember what i told you. nothing else matters.” and alison sighs and keeps it in her drawer, waiting for a phone call or a text or anything really. and days passes and she hasn’t heard from beth and she’s just worried she screwed things up. 

and then sarah manning is arriving to her home telling her beth commited suicide, and that same night alison reads the note and cries curled up in the bed whispering “i loved you too. i loved you too…”

Lorde Boston 9/6/14

I was streaming her performance live and what she said before Ribs just blew my mind. I happened to have written down most of what she said.

“It makes me so happy to have this job and to do what I do for people..Not every group is like this, holy shit thank you so much. This song we’re abt to play was a song written 2 years ago now. I wrote it the morning after a house party on my couch and I remember wanting to get down to write this song..that feeling that youre an adult not a kid anymore.
That’s something I’m always struggling with…And I’m constantly watching myself, did i lose it, is it still there? It’s terrifying not thinking the way you used to. Not thinking why not, I can do that and theres something abt doing this—coming to a city, who puts a lot of lobster in a roll..good invention, with all these buildings watching over us and it looks like were right in the middle of everything. And I can feel like im not alone and stuff. I know alot of you are similar to my age and you know how it feels to be constantly running from whatever it is that’s to come and I never thought that I could come to a city like this so far from where I’m from with all of these people just hanging out, its so special and I’m so grateful to you for staying. Thank you so much Boston.

This is Ribs.

And Boston were about to dance to this one is that okay?

Put up some lights!”


A love so fake-Part 2

You arrived at home with tear stained cheeks and looking horrifying. You trudged up the stairs and into your room, making sure to slam the door.

You turned on your phone to see 20 missed calls and 40 text messages, most of them from Jack and the others from Mahogany and Hayes.

You clicked on ‘Jack ♥’ and sent him a message.

You: We’re over.

About two minutes later you got a reply from Jack.

Jack: Why baby girl??? What did I do wrong? Please tell me I’ll fix anything between us. Please don’t do this!

You: I heard everything you said to your friends in the bathroom.

Jack: (Y/n)…

You: Leave me alone. Don’t bother talking to me.

Jack: I’m sorry..

You: Stfu. Goodbye.

You turned off your phone and went to bed, though you didn’t sleep much since you were crying.

The next morning you got up did your business in the the bathroom and then started getting dressed. You put on light blue ripped skinny jeans, folding them a bit at the bottom, a grey hoodie with your white converse. You put your hair in a ponytail and put on no makeup.

As you arrived at school you made sure to look anywhere but the people. As you made your way to your locker you saw Jack G and he was standing next to (y/bf/n) and laughing while flirting.

Anger built up inside you and tears stung at your eyes but you tried to keep them in as you reached your locker.

You quickly stuffed shit in and got our stuff for your first two classes. As you shut your locker Jack G made his way beside you.

You were about to turn away when he spoke up.

“(y/n) I’m sorry.. I know it looks bad… but I wanted to know if you minded me dating (y/bf/n)?” he asked scratching the back of his head awkwardly.

This hurt a lot. You couldn’t believe him. Here you thought he was about to apologize to you but instead here he was asking if he could date your best friend!

“Why the fuck are you asking me? Haven’t your hurt me enough? Go ahead and date her I don’t give a shit. But just don’t fuck her over.” you spit out harshly before turning on your heels and storming off.


All characters belong to DC and the creators of the TT show



Her terrified screams echoed through the tower, just like every other night.

It was 2:30 am when Beast Boy was rudely awakened from his slumber. The screams woke him, and only him. Cyborg was in his ‘room’, recharging for the day to come, Robin and Starfire were out on  early morning patrol (at least, thats what the couple told Beast Boy. Who knows what they could really be doing) and Raven - well, the screams were coming from Raven.

Knowing that Cyborg was too ‘flat’ to hear anything, Beast Boy slowly pushed himself up and yanked the bedsheets off his body groggily,  making a sound mixed with a groan and a yawn as he fumbled. Looks like it’s my turn. Damn, why did Star have to go on patrol? I need my beauty sleep!

It had become a normal thing to be woken up by Raven’s screams in the middle of the night. Usually, when not on ‘patrol’ with her boyfriend, Starfire would rush to her friend’s aid while everyone else simply continued on with their sleeping. Not tonight though. It was Beast Boys turn.

“C’mon BB, what’s she gonna do? there is nothing to worry about!” he reassured himself in hurried whispers. He had been wanting to avoid doing this very thing, and he had. Until now. It wasn’t that he didn’t trust Raven, because he did. Beast Boy would trust Raven with his life. It’s just… Raven can sometimes lose control… and if what Starfire has said to be true, then she’s most likely on the brink of losing it right now.

“C’mon Beast Boy! it’s what friends do! Star never gets hurt, so why are you so worried?”

Because it’s me!Beast Boy teased himself goofily, trying to calm himself down. Somehow, it worked.

Suddenly filled with a strong sense of duty, Beast Boy bounded out of his bed, wearing nothing but his boxers and bolted out of the room. He sprinted down the dimly lit halls, accidentally knocking into a small table leaning against the wall in the process. Gotta tell Robin we need that thing gone, Beast Boy absently noted after letting out a short but loud yowl of pain. Luckily, Ravens screams were loud enough that they blocked it out. I’m coming Rae!

Finally after some blind staggering through the dark, Beast Boy was standing outside of Raven’s room. The off-limits room basically. His hand was trembling with fear when he lifted it over the keypad to open the door. Going into Raven’s was mostly strictly off limits, so who could blame Beast Boy for being scared to go in it? sure, he had before, but Raven never liked it. Never.  Hopefully, she’d be a bit more acceptable of it tonight…

“Ra-Rae?” Beast Boy called nervously, his voice trembling. “A-are you o-okay? Can I come in-?!”

Beast Boy didn’t wait for an answer. As soon as Raven’s screams muffled out his words, he slammed his fists onto the key pad and sped inside her room faster than Kid Flash.

The sight that loomed before him was one he never wanted to see. Ever. Raven lay on her purple bed, with her sheets wrapped around her tightly as beads of sweat trickled over her writhing body. Her normally calm and beautiful face, was scrunched up in excruciating pain. The sounds she made were nothing but screams, cries and heavy, pained breathing. Seeing Raven, the girl he loved like this was torturous. Oh geez, never knew it was this bad. I’ve gotta do something!

“Raven!” was all he could think of to say before rushing towards her. What do I do what do I do what do I do?!

“C’mon! it’s just a dream!” Beast Boy was becoming distraught. He needed to know how Starfire handled this, and fast. Doing the first thing that came to mind, Beast Boy reached down to Raven’s shoulders and violently (Unintentionally) shook her.

“RAVEN WAKE UP-!” Beast Boy words were abruptly cut off as Raven’s hands whipped up and firmly grasped his wrists, sending an unsettling chill up his spine. The Changeling shuddered at her touch.

“R-Rae? you awake or should I start running?” Beast Boy spoke softly. At his shaky words, Raven’s big violet eyes fluttered open, and her grip loosened.

“Beast Boy?” she let go of his wrists, “Are you really there?” Raven asked groggily, as if she had no idea what was happening. Beast Boy watched in puzzlement as she struggled to push herself up. When she eventually did, she let out a loud wince of pain.

“Slow down, slow down!” Beast Boy fretted and not so gently pushed Raven back onto her bed, causing her to wince again and throw him a quick glare. Stupid idiot!

“Dammit, I’m sorry! and uh yeah, I’m really here…” he spoke cautiously, uncertain of how his fellow titan will act.

She didn’t say anything, only shut her eyes and breathed a small, barely audible sigh of relief. Beast Boy frowned.

“Um, Raven, are you alright? you were screaming a minute ago, drenched in sweat, and asking if I’m real, and now it looks like you’re about to meditate?” he queried anxiously with utter confusion written all over his green face. Opening her eyes, Raven exhaled heavily and bowed her head in shame.

“I-i’m fine. It was just a dream. It was nothing.” Her last words faded into silence, as if she was trying to convince herself something, when obviously she did not believe it.

“Are you sure? you don’t look fine- I mean, you do! you always look fine- in fact, you look great! you just don’t look- It just doesn’t look like it was nothing. It never looks like it’s nothing.” The words came stumbling out of Beast Boy’s mouth as soon as he opened it. He wanted to slap himself for his stupidity. ‘You alway look fine? in fact you look great?!’ what was that! this is a serious matter Beast Boy!

“Garfield, it’s noth-“

“Don’t say it’s nothing, Rae.” Beast Boy cut in sharply at the sound of his real name. “You always say it’s nothing whenever I or the other Titans ask! we all know it isn’t nothing.” Beast Boy sat himself down next to Raven to grab her drifting attention. “Can’t you tell us what’s wrong? we’re your friends. Can’t you at least tell me?” he pleaded.

Slowly, Raven lifted her head up so the two were eye to eye. Her violet eyes narrowed.

“Why do you even care Garfield?” Demanded Raven weakly, tired and fearful of Beast Boy’s concerns and worries, knowing it could possibly put him in harms way. Of coarse, he didn’t know that, and even if he did it still wouldn’t stop him.

“Raven, you’re my-“ you’re the love of my life? no, that definitely won’t work. “-friend, and seeing you - I hate to say it - weak, is scary, and all it makes me want to do is-“ hold you and love you? yeah, as if Raven would allow that. “- help and be there for you! Really, that’s all I want to do! And so do the others! why do you have to shut us out all the time?! Even though you may not know it because of your- your stupid meditating and reading, we’re here for you! I’m here for you, and you don’t even know it!” Beast Boy lashed out in an unexpected and unintentional burst of anger that he didn’t know he had been bottling up. Hiding his true feelings from not only Raven, but the whole team, did this to him. Frequently.

Unfortunately for Beast Boy, waking up the daughter of a demon from what appeared to be a nightmare then continuing to yell at her was not the best thing to do.

“You think I don’t know that?” she growled, her violet eyes slowly changing into scarlet. “You think I don’t see the look on your face every time I snap? or hear your hushed whispers of what you fear about me?! Admit it, you don’t even care!” Raven’s eyes were blazing. If it was any other night, this would have made Beast Boy run for it, but not tonight. He couldn’t leave now. Not when Raven was like… this.

“…All I do is scare or hurt people, and I don’t want you to be next.” Raven murmured glumly under her breath, and for the first time allowed herself to express an emotion in front of the boy she always thought would never see her like this. Sadness. Tears began to well up in her eyes, and the red glow quickly faded away.

Beast Boy had never seen Raven like this. He wasn’t sure if anyone had seen Raven like this… it must be the dream. There is no other reasonable explanation of why she would be so… open towards him, of all people…

“I’m telling you the truth.” Beast Boy said in a surprisingly soothing voice.

“I’m here for you, no matter what. You’ve scared me HEAPS of times already, and I’m still here!” He said with a comforting grin and placed a reassuring hand onto Raven’s slumped shoulder, sending a warm sensation through her body and filling her with a short, bittersweet bliss that disappeared as soon as he pulled away.

“I know, and I’m sorry…” Raven sniffled, avoiding direct eye contact and brought her knees up to her face, where she propped them up to her chin and tightly hugged her legs.”But really, you don’t want to be there for me. No one does, or should. It’s best if you just look at me as a teammate, and nothing else.”

Beast Boy’s grin faltered. Why on Earth is she saying these things? she knows that I would never do that! She must know! how could she not? isn’t it obvious?! I’m pretty sure I was terrible at hiding it!

“Raven! you can’t seriously expect me to do that… can you?” he scoffed in shock. Raven’s grim eyes confirmed his suspicions. It was as if this wasn’t bothering her at all. It bothered Beast Boy immensely.

“What?! NO!” He barked and shuffled his whole body and legs so he was fully facing Raven. She did not react to his actions, only when he snatched her hands away from her knees and gave them a light squeeze. She reacted then, with a light, hardly noticeable, basically IMPOSSIBLE to notice, blush. She didn’t say anything though. Not even a single protest.

“I don’t know what’s going on with you, but you need to stop this selfish bullshit. RIGHT NOW.”  Beast Boy ordered, sounding scarily similar to an infuriated Robin with a temporary scowl to go  along with it.

The look on Raven’s face however, made it all collapse. A sharp pang of guilt hit Beast Boy almost instantly when the two locked eyes.

“Listen to me Raven,” he sighed after a few seconds of tense silence, “I-“ Was he really going to say this?


“-I care for you. Much more than anyone else, and much more than you probably realise, if you haven’t read my mind or something. You can’t make me suddenly stop just because- because- you haven’t even told me why! seriously Raven? that’s low, even for you-” the changeling did NOT mean to utter that last bit. It just sort of came out in a quick rush of spite. “-Just- please, Raven, I don’t understand whats going on, but please please PLEASE let me help!”

No surprise, Beast Boy received zero response from Raven. He reluctantly turned away from the titan with a drawn-out sigh of defeat. “Fine.” he muttered bluntly. Feeling a little bit guilty, Raven stared at the back of Beat Boy’s green messy hair as he contemplated on whether to leave or stay. She never noticed how nice the colour was until now. She was so captivated by the strange yet gorgeous green hair, that she almost didn’t notice the owner of the hair stand up and begin to move away in a huff.

“W-wait,” Raven croaked and firmly grasped Beast Boy’s hand. For a second, he froze at her surprisingly warm touch. It was different. Raven’s touch had alway been cold, or at least the very few times Raven touched Beast Boy. It was different, but nice.

Raven couldn’t help but blush when she realised Beast Boy’s back and chest were… well, there!

With little remorse, her eyes drifted to his well shaped shoulders and happily stayed there until he turned around to face her, his wrist still imprisoned tightly by her hands. Beast Boy stood there in silence and puzzlement for a short while before he realised Raven’s violet eyes were ogling his bare chest. A smug smirk played onto his lips. Then it trembled. Then it transformed into a gaping hole.

“RAVEN!” he shrieked in terror and threw his hands over his chest, “That is th-that i-is very inappropriate in a time like this!” he said over-dramatically as his cheeks became a bright pink… mixed with green. It was fair to say that Best Boy became very self-conscious around Raven.

At Beast Boy’s shriek, Raven dropped her gaze to the floor in embarrassment. Her grey cheeks flushed a deep red, and she was only able to mutter a few words without feeling like rubbish;

“It’s the dreams.”    

I knew it Beast Boy thought with a frown. Raven’s dreams were never good, even if they were just dreams. But if they were making her want to push her closest friends away… well, they must getting worse.

For once, the Changeling was starting to act serious. He dropped his hands from his chest and rushed back to Raven’s side, his whole body back on the bed. Before he let a word escape his untrustworthy mouth, he froze. Do I really want to know? no, but I gotta help.

“Did you want to talk about it?” asked Beast Boy quietly as he absently took Raven’s hands in his.

“My father - and you and the team were in it. That’s all you need to know… I don’t really want to talk about it.” she told him defensively and recoiled her hands out of his grasp.

Hurt but not broken, Beast Boy persisted.

“I’m just trying to help, geez. Besides, didn’t you like, kick his ass? he’s gone, isn’t he?” he said with a frown and a furrowed brow.

For a moment, it looked as if Raven didn’t know how to answer his question. Could Trigon still be around? I hope not.

Then, to Beast Boy’s relief, she slowly nodded once.

“Phew, you scared me for a second there.” Beast Boy said and elbowed Raven playfully in the arm. They locked eyes for a brief second, and Beast Boy thought it was fine. Nice, even. Until Raven pulled her gaze away in a unneeded rush.

“S-sorry,” Beast Boy chuckled nervously with a tiny hint of sadness before looking away unwillingly and having to hide his flushing cheeks of embarrassment. Just making this worse, BB! It’s time to leave Rae. She obviously doesn’t want you here…

“I guess I’ll-“


Beast Boy glanced up at Raven with his trademark look etched onto his face, utter confusion. The demonic girl was staring  right at him. It was… weird. A good weird.

“Don’t? don’t what?” asked Beast Boy curiously, oblivious to the fact that Raven was reaching for his chest. Did Raven want him to stay? Pfft, as if BB!

The demonic girl didn’t jump to answer, but slowly, as if afraid of hurting someone, wrapped her arms around Beast Boy’s body and buried her face into the crook of his neck. She was… hugging?

SHE’S HUGGING ME. Beast Boy internally shrieked and sat there in shock. WHAT DO I DO?!

After a while of mild confusion, Beast Boy responded like any crazy person would. He hugged Raven tightly, never wanting to let go, and kissed her on the forehead. Why? maybe it had something to do with a sudden… urge.

“Please don’t leave.” Raven begged in a hushed whisper as tears began falling from her eyes. Taken by surprised, Beast Boy pulled back a little too forcefully and stared at Raven right in the eye. Wh-what is seriously going on with her? He wondered, but didn’t dare ask. The tears streaming down her grey cheeks told him all he needed to know. Raven needed him.

“I won’t.”


Then, she kissed him.

At first, Beast Boy was too taken aback to react. Then, when Raven began to pull away, he came to his senses. Lifting his hands, Beast Boy seized her by the hips and pulled her closer, wanting nothing but to take her all in. It was all Raven wanted too.

The kissing quickly became hungry and passionate. Beast Boys hands searched every part of her back, while one of hers buried deep into his hair, fingers sprawled. The other clawed at his shoulders in immense pleasure. Beast Boy forgot about the conversation in an instant and was transported into another world of pure bliss. He didn’t even notice the continuous flow of Ravens tears until a single sob escaped her heavenly lips.

“Rae?” he said and reluctantly edged a few centimetres away, only then noticing the stinging pain in his shoulders. He tried his best to ignore it. “I’m here for you, remember? whatever you need.”

“I know,” Raven managed and wiped away the tears. Her dream was still there, clearly drilled into her mind. Although she wouldn’t say it, she was deeply thankful for Beast Boys company. He soothed the pain, and for the first time, made her feel… complete. “Could you stay with me, Garfield?”

Beast Boys heart skipped a beat. Sure, he had heard Raven say his name many times, but only in spite. This was different. How? Beast Boy had no idea. Then again, his brain temporarily shut down as soon as Ravens lips touched his, so maybe he did know.

“I am- I think.”

“No,” Raven muttered, “could you sleep with me?”

She didn’t have to explain herself. Beast Boy understood.

“Of coarse.” he said with a comforting smile and lifted his hands up to her blushing cheeks. He placed a light kiss on her lips and pulled her into a warm embrace. “Whatever you need.”

It was then, that the trauma and fear began to fade away. In Beast Boys arms, Raven felt the most safest. “Thank you. Garfield, I-I want you to know, th-that I care for you too…”

It was then, that they realised they couldn’t live without each other.

Slowly, with arms wrapped around one another, foreheads touching and eyes shut, they lay down. Raven could feel herself drifting off, but Beast Boy was wide awake. His heart was racing at the sound of Ravens words. ‘I care for you too.’ could that mean…?

“Thank you, Beast Boy.” Raven repeated with a yawn, pulling Beast Boy out of his perplexed thoughts. She embraced the changeling tighter and buried her head into the crook of his neck affectionately.

“Heh, no problem.” Beast Boy chuckled arrogantly as he finally began to feel content. Still, Ravens words continued to bother him.

“Rae, you still awake?” He asked after minutes of a tranquil silence.

“Mm hmm.” she mumbled and slightly stirred, but kept her arms around the changeling and her eyes shut.

“Can I ask you something?”

“Mm hmm.”

“What do you mean by ‘I care for you too’?”

“I mean the same thing as what you do.”

Beast Boy felt his heart skip a beat again. Raven only felt herself dive into a rare peaceful slumber.

“Raven,” Beast Boy whispered in shock and joy, softly resting his chin onto her head as his eyes closed. “I love you too.”

For what felt like the first time in ages, Raven let herself smile.

i was thinking about sabo and luffy’s reunion scene, and how a lot of people seem to bemoan/are confused by sabo not crying in that scene.  but i’ve never felt bothered by it, so i was like “should i be????  why aren’t i???” and i started trying to think about why

and idk it just brought back a memory of this one time when i was younger and my dad got bitten by a wasp and it really, really hurt him- and i know it did because he was lying on the couch moaning and half crying and my dad p much never openly expresses pain or upset-ness like that in front of me.  and i felt really bad because i knew i should’ve supported him or wished i could take his pain away or w/e but at the time all i kept thinking was that i wanted him to stop crying.

because it was scary.  it’s scary to see someone you look up to, someone who’s taken care of you and always taken care to stay composed in front of you break down like that.

and i think that’s something luffy felt majorly at marineford.  to see this person he’s always thought of as stronger and cooler than him weak and crying when ace probably had almost never cried in front of him before…it was probably weird, and unknown, and terrifying. 

and…i feel like sabo knew that.  he realized how scary it must have been for luffy to see that.  not because it was wrong of ace to cry, but just because seeing your heroes forced into that positon sucks.  

sabo didn’t want to put luffy through that again.  because of his absence, during his reunion with luffy, i’m sure sabo’s one goal was to just do what was best for luffy.  and he probably thought what was best was for him to be someone to lean on if he needed to, a stone wall of support and understanding- for luffy to not have to see him break down like ace did (tho obviously he wanted to, considering we know he starting crying right after luffy left) 

because this wasn’t about his pain, this was about luffy’s pain, and reassuring luffy that it was good that he was alive even though ace was dead.  it wasn’t even about them comforting each other, no, sabo completely took himself out of the equation because he wanted to comfort luffy, and not make luffy feel the need to comfort him as well, since this was about letting luffy cry and get it out, not him.

not to mention, in the asl flashback sabo also hid his tears when he was forced to leave ace and luffy by his dad. it didn’t mean he didn’t give a shit.  it didn’t mean he didn’t care.  he hid his tears, both then and upon meeting luffy again, because he cared and didn’t want them to feel bad.

it’s like what oda said about ace smiling while dying:  “when a person cradles a crying baby, they always smile, right? same as that. because [ace] wants [luffy] to smile, he dies with a peaceful smile in the end, and i think that shows us his kindness.”   ace smiled when he died to comfort luffy.  sabo smiled during their reunion to comfort luffy.  whether it was the “”right”” choice to do so or not, sabo not crying in front of luffy was an act of kindness.

Xochitl, why won’t you sleep little Xochitl?

We’ve finally bought a new place of our own that we call home now.. I know that we’re well off and many of you may be expecting a great grand big house like my mama and papa but nope! We don’t and that’s because..

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