You’ll have to excuse me...

I’m sorry I wasn’t myself today. You see, 24 hours ago I lost a piece of me. Was it a death in the family? Yeah, that’s it. They were my family for 15 years. Not something you get over in a day. A wound takes time to heal. So please, you’ll have to excuse me. I lost myself today. I was back a decade watching a scared little girl hiding from her world in an epic story of crime, drama, humor, love, and loss. How do you say goodbye to the constant companion of a childhood wrecked with loss? I was never good at goodbyes. So if you see a silent tear roll down my face, you’ll have to excuse me. I just let go of my past self.



I feel like I’m just about to lose it. I just got a call from my mom that my 94 year old grandpa is in the hospital with a high fever and possibly a stroke.I am so worried that I literally feel sick to my stomach. It sucks to be in college and being away from home. I have no idea how I am going to take my midterms this week. I really just can’t right now. I know crying isn’t going to do anything for me… but what is a better alternative? I just want to be home right now.

i hate being so far away from them..

i said im gonna sleep early tonight since i dont have any homework.. i couldnt sleeeep, why? i miss my cousins, my friends, my family.. people who have the biggest part of me.. back in the Philippines.
i thought of going thru my cousin slash bestfriend slash sister’s facebook.. she upload tons of pictures of them on Christmas. All my cousins aunts uncles and grandma was there. and found out im having my first god daughter on february, one of my cousins is having a baby boy this february and he messaged me that imma be his godmother, whether im there or not lol my grandma looked healthy and happy in the pictures and im glad to see her like that.. when i left i had cute little cousins(id call them little coz i was taller, which is not usual so i was proud), now theyre like taller than meee omg it’s like not 4 years that passed but 10yearsss

its been freakin four years. i wanna go home.. please.. well i actually i am but id have to wait for eleven monthsss. im seriously cryin right now i couldnt help it.. i wanna go home.. and give them the sweetest hug on earth..

i miss you all.. aaaaahhhh


i don’t think i’ve ever cried so much watching anything in a long time. i’ve never even had a dog but if i had to imagine what it was like getting attached to one and then having to give it up to someone else…apink pretends to be all strong and imnotgoingtocry but come on now, let’s be serious that wasn’t going to happen. i’m not sure if it’s because they are girls, but they seemed so much more attached to their dogs than infinite. i obviously cried during both but this seemed so much sadder. THEY COULD NOT STOP CRYING AND IT JUST BROKE MY HEART. </3