I think about you everyday,
But I don’t feel the urge to dial your number today.
I think I’ve finally realized the person greeting me at the other end won’t be the person who resides in my heart but Someone who left in the middle of the night and robbed me of all my faith in people.
For the longest time, I hated you.
I couldn’t understand why you would leave me when I needed you the most.
I just couldn’t understand why you couldn’t do 10% of what I did for you all these years.
You had to be a rotten person with a rotten soul.
Right? Right? Right!
I think I’ve finally come to understand the fault in you and that in most others around me.
You aren’t a bad person.
You are just weak.
I was expecting strength from a person who wouldn’t even know what that is.
I was expecting courage from someone who was filled with cowardice from head to toe.
I can’t really blame you for being weak but I can learn to not surround myself with people who don’t match my strength.
When I use the word ‘weak’, it’s not what you think.
I cry. All the time.
I display my emotions like I own a boutique.
I have weekly breakdowns.
Sometimes, I get nightmares while doing daily chores.
None of that is being weak.
Being weak is running away.
It is being selfish.
It is not being able to stand up for what you believe in.
It is not being able to say what you feel.
It is seeing someone suffer and rolling your eyes.
It is lies instead of a vocabulary.
You are weak.
I can forgive you.
I understand you aren’t a bad person.
I forgive you.
I have the strength to do so.