[ “Even when they’re superheroes, women aren’t allowed to be heroes, only victims. Even when they’re violently murdered, men aren’t allowed to be victims – only heroes or nonentities.
The sexist distribution of violence hurts women, who are told, over and over, that they are first and foremost sexual objects, that they are constantly endangered, that they must rely on men for protection, and that they aren’t able to be heroes on their own account.
But the sexism also hurts men. Onscreen, men are rarely allowed to be vulnerable; they’re always supposed to great violence with indifference, and/or with greater violence. Men are told, over and over, that violence, by and against men, is natural, and not to be remarked upon. Men die, onscreen and in war, and that’s just the way of things. Men, if they’re men, don’t protest.” ]
When I was in fourth grade, we had to watch a video about puberty. The teachers separated the boys and girls into two separate rooms and we watched a 20-30 minute video and then the teachers answered questions we had. That’s reasonable, right?
What isn’t though is the fact that they told us girls that the boys were watching a Bill Nye movie.
They told us we need to keep our “puberty talk” a secret from the boys.
They told us we can’t tell them what was going on.
They told us its a secret.
They told us that boys don’t start puberty until high school.
They told us that our period was just a muscle that tenses up once a month, causing blood vessels to pop and bleed.
They never once told us it is part of reproduction, or even that it was an organ, not a muscle.
They never once told us that it isn’t something to be ashamed of.
They never once told us that it literally is okay to go through this, and that its completely natural.
They lied to us. They made us ashamed. They taught us to hide what happens to our body for most of our lives.
Until sixth grade, I thought boys wouldn’t hit puberty until seventeen.
Until sixth grade, I didn’t know that it was an organ, not a muscle.
Until sixth grade, I didn’t even know that dark clumps in the blood is tissue and not some sort of disease running through my veins.
It has been years, and I am still so pissed off that they would do this. They brain washed hundreds and hundreds if little girls into thinking that their period is something to be ashamed of.
I think its time we start telling girls that it isn’t.
I hate how when you complain about cat-callers, everyone nods in sympathy but nothing is actually done.
I hate how nothing can be done about cat-callers
I hate how, when I told a friend I was going into the city but didn’t want to be wearing shorts, she looked me up and down and told me that “I was probably fine but I should just be prepared for stupid comments anyway”
I hate how ^that is not an uncommon conversation
I hate how I feel the need to wear clothing that covers my body (even in warm weather) to discourage cat-callers even though it’s a testable proven fact that be catcalling has less to do with what you’re wearing and more to do with being female
I hate how my mother ends our conversations with “Be safe. Keep your New York City wits about you.”
I hate how she’s not wrong to be worried and that that is reasonable advice.
I hate how I know I wouldn’t be getting that send off if I was a guy.
I hate how I get anxious when I’m walking through the city and have to stand still at traffic lights.
I hate how, if you stop for too long, there is the risk of some guy trying to talk to you.
I hate how, once he’s started talking to you, it’s hard to get rid of him, even if you don’t respond, even if you walk away.
I hate how on several different occasions, guys have followed me for a couple blocks trying to talk to me
I hate how the only sure fire way to get rid of him is to tell him I “have a boyfriend”
I hate the way I watch the eyes of every guy that walks by me so I can track where he’s staring.
I hate the way I do 360 checks to make sure no one is following me from time to time.
I hate the way I mentally brace myself every time I walk pass a group of guys, or a guy standing outside a store handing out flyers, or the guys outside the Empire State Building, or a construction site
I hate being leered at by guys I pass.
I hate the creepy smiles.
I hate how threatening eye contact can seem.
I hate how sometimes they feel entitled to try and touch me.
I hate being shouted at by guys on the streets.
I hate how, sometimes, the shouts come from unexpected places, like guys on bicycles or guys in cars driving by
I hate how often they don’t say anything intelligible, just a chorus of “hey baby”s and “Omigod”s and “Damn”s and “Look at that”s and “Sexy, sexy”s and whistles and jeers and vocalizations
I hate when they do say something intelligible and you have to hear exactly what he wants to do to you or how he wants to do it.
Most of all…
I hate how you can’t say anything back.
I hate how everyone tells you the smart thing to do is to just swallow your pride, keep your head down, don’t make eye contact, and keep walking.
Because you don’t know how they’ll respond if you say something back.
Because you don’t know if they have a temper.
Because you don’t know if they have a knife.
Or a gun.
Or just a fist.
I hate how everyone is right.
I hate how the smart thing to do is to just endure it.
I hate the implicit threat of violence there is just from being female in a public space
Next, this is copied and pasted from one of my own posts that I keep open to refute people like you. “Women hold power over men”. Let’s see:
1 out of every 6 American women have experienced attempted or completed rape. This number is higher for certain demographics - for example, 1 in 3 indigenous/native American women will be raped in her lifetime.
This number is even higher for trans women (1 in 5)
Men are told they cannot be raped and their experiences are invalidated.
Being feminine is degrading in our society - hence, gendered slurs and statements
There are still trolls that attack me on Tumblr and Twitter, calling me slurs and threatening to rape me, simply for wanting equal rights. (Almost all other feminist blogs can attest to this). Sorry, but feminists aren’t the ones spewing rape and death threats.
Women are afraid to say no to unwanted advances because they could very well be hurt, but then they are criticized for “not being clear” and showing “mixed signals”.
People like Donald Trump can run for president and actually stand a chance at winning.
People still think it’s okay to catcall women. Street harassment is a problem that affects ALL women and it’s at the hands of men.
Young girls are forced into marriages worldwide (including in the United States!)
There are no regulations to ensure that sex workers are kept safe. Even if they choose to work in the sex industry (as opposed to being trafficked) they can still be assaulted or murdered, and they have no government protections.
Sex trafficking victims can actually be imprisoned themselves for prostitution.