why this isn't me

4

A pining sap

  • fanfic writer: *writing* Oh wow, they are going to love this. This is by far my best work!
  • fic: *witty lines* *perfect love making* *fluffy enough to kill us all* *a dash of angst, a smidgen of hurt/comfort*
  • fanfic writer: Oh man. This is it. This will be my legacy! *sweats into fic* *bleeds into fic* *cries into fic* *spends days perfecting the grammar and verbage and sex scenes* *has 15 betas look over it*
  • fanfic writer: Okay. It is finally time to release my baby on the world. Here you go fandom. You're welcome.
  • fandom: Ha, cute. *like* *kudos*
  • fanfic writer: :/
  • * * *
  • same fanfic writer: *writing* Whatever. This is shit, I don't even care right now. A singing squirrel? Sure, let's do it. Haha, cheesy lines that make no sense, sure. Grammatical errors out the wazoo? Why not. No one's going to read this piece of crap anyway, I literally wrote it on a scrap of 1 ply toilet paper with a broken yellow crayon.
  • fanfic writer: LOL *post*
  • fandom: OMG THIS IS THE BEST THING YOU HAVE EVER GRANTED US WITH, WHERE HAS THIS BEEN ALL MY LIFE, OMG, I NEED A SEQUEL IMMEDIATELY, PLEASE. WHAT THE. I'M NOT EVEN WORTHY. *kudosrebloglikereccomment*
  • fanfic writer: *sigh*
Houses as Tumblr Text Posts Part Eight
  • Gryffindor: Hey can you hold this for me *gives you my hand*
  • Hufflepuff: *wakes up from a nap I didn't realize I was taking*
  • Ravenclaw: *sips tea or coffee* If I don't do anything, maybe I won't mess this up more
  • Slytherin: *buy the book "How To- Make Friends Without Revealing Everything About Yourself"*
4

Legends of Tomorrow | 2.11

We’ve been all over time.

The deeper I got into astrology the more compatibility became less significant for me, like if I saw someone’s chart I had an interest it’s not like a “oh shit we’re not compatible boo.” It’s more like, “oh!” It’s like looking through a window through their perspective. So if we’re having trouble with communications I’ll just be like, “oh he has a Capricorn mercury, so he’s definitely a logical person with a dry sense of humor,” so then I’ll just use some of my sarcasm towards him. Like, because of that, whenever someone asks for the compatibility it’s literally like, “who the fuck cares, go for it.”

2

dan and phil meme: ‘try new things’ video [1/1] » How To Make Dan Cringe

I swear on your mum’s life, I will punch you in the face right now.

sophie: *invades howl’s home, cleans everything without his permission, is mean to him, bullies his friends, steals his seven-league-boots, does always the exact opposite of what he says*

howl:

sophie: *messes up his hair products*

howl:

8

Now let’s go to sleep, I have a feeling I’ll be late for school tomorrow…

(spoiler alert, she couldn’t even sleep, she squealed in her bed until her alarm went off… and so did he) 

it took me…. so long…… to finish this….. it wasn’t supposed to get this long, holy shit……….

ANYWAY, ANON WHO REQUESTED A REVEAL, I hope you like this… I know this isn’t exactly what you asked for but it’s what i could do. also please pretend you can’t notice i had no idea what i was doing 

EDIT: the text is a bit hard to read, so I wrote it down under the cut: 

Keep reading

8

I had a friend once. We ran together when I was little. And I thought we were the same. But when we grew up, we weren’t

I need you to know we’re not so different. I need my friend back.

Bonus:

Darkiplier Never Left: A Theory

Okay, so this theory has been bouncing around in my brain since March, and I’ve briefly touched on it before, but I’ve never fleshed it out on here. Buckle in, homies. This is a long ride full of excessive bolding and italics, and we’ve abandoned the land of chill and “Read More”s.

As always, this connects to my other theories.They’re not required reading, but they will definitely help. I’ll link to the two most relevant ones (which are also the two most popular ones, so that’s neat!): The big bad, which explains the purpose of each of the egos in Markiplier TV; and this one, which explains why Mark is trying to undermine Dark.

In Markiplier TV, there are two heads to the table. One of them has already presented his plan to take back control. We’re about to witness the plan of the other. 

What is the plan exactly? Well, that much we’re not sure of, yet, except that one of the clues we’ve been given is a piece of what looks to be a ransom note. We’ve also been given a still from some security cam footage, which, when brightened, has a clear anaglyph (red/blue) effect. (You can view the brightened version here, courtesy of the lovely @amycampbell00.) This leads many to believe that someone (Mark, most likely) has been taken hostage, and that Dark is behind it. I agree with this, but I think that we’re making a mistake in assuming that this is a recent development. In fact, the point I’m here to make in this post is that Dark has had control of the channel since his very first official appearance in February. 

Let’s take a look at the psychology behind Dark as a character. He has two serious hyper-focuses: control and choice. Control is what he desires; choice is what he denies. During the Horror route of A Date with Markiplier, his obsession with the concept of choice is emphasized repeatedly. 

What’s interesting about this is that he follows this statement by, technically, giving you a choice– but what he presents you with is actually just the illusion of choice. It may seem like there are different paths to take, but only one will actually make a difference. The rest send you directly to dead ends. No matter what you do, you will, ultimately, have to make the “choice” that he has been leading you to all along. 

Immediately after this exercise in futility, he extolls the virtues of avoiding choice altogether and letting him have control. 

Okay, so why is this relevant? Well, consider this: we also know that Dark doesn’t exactly obey the laws of space and time. (Mark directly mentioned this fact in the February live stream.) Not only that, but he has some semblance of control over it as well– when you try to escape during the Exit video, he immediately creates a time loop and sends you back inside. He has complete and utter control of the situation at every moment, and if things don’t go the way he plans, he can literally manipulate the world around him. 

Knowing all of this, why would Dark then allow us to make this choice?

He wouldn’t. Of course he wouldn’t.

This man just spent the entirety of his time with us asserting that he was in control, and that choices are not only unnecessary, but dangerous. He set up a false choice to emphasize that point. There is no way he would give us a genuine choice after all of that. It goes against everything we know about him. Even if he was genuinely caught off guard (which I find hard to believe, but that’s a point for another post), he would not set himself up in a position of vulnerability that would immediately undermine all of his efforts up to that point. Any sort of “weakness” he would present would only be in the service of a greater purpose. 

Darkiplier can manipulate what we see. He can manipulate what we hear. He can manipulate the laws of space and time. He doesn’t need to give us any power over him. 

He’s tired of giving people a choice, and we are no exception. We don’t have the option to shoot Dark. We never did.

No matter what we choose, we will be shooting Mark. Mark didn’t escape on his own to confront Dark– if he had, Dark would have simply thrown him back in as he did in the Exit video. No, Dark let him escape. Dark let the gun fall at our feet. And Dark let us shoot him– except, of course, that he didn’t. The only difference your “choice” makes is how long he pretends to be the real Mark. 

 This all circles back around to his obsessions: he will give us the illusion of control over the situation and a choice in the outcome, when in reality, we have neither. And these things shape the most dangerous illusion of them all: the illusion of safety.

Mark isn’t in control of the channel. Mark hasn’t been in control of the channel for a long, long time. We already know that Dark can imitate Mark flawlessly, and he’s been doing so for months. Those brief moments in videos that appear to be Dark exercising the weak amount of power he has left? Those are simply to make us believe he’s not running the show. He’s practically taunting us.

He’s been pulling the strings for months now, patiently waiting for the right time to step out from the shadows and reveal his plan. Judging by the events of the past few days, he’s finally ready. The real question is, 

are we?

Horikoshi be like “the hardest one to draw is Todoroki because he’s supposed to be beautiful and drawing beautiful people is hard” but then you go through one (1) Kirishima centered chapter and he’s like 

so what is the truth

As a Christian

I can honestly say that understanding, tolerance, compassion, and acceptance are the main characteristics of my religion, and many people in the practice don’t believe that, and it makes me really sad. The scripture says bring your weary, tired and broken, not your white, male, and cis.

3

Commission for @roguefankc for their wonderful crossover fic:

He Asked For His Best Shot 

sorry it took me so long! but i hope you like it @roguefankc

(i especially love how john and steve are all jolly and get along, meanwhile sherlock and bucky are like two sulking petulant kids fighting at the back xD thank you for this wonderful request, it was great fun to make :)