why i can't forget you

it’s 12:54 and i’m sitting in the dark
blocking out and denying the sun
i’ve wanted to paint the walls for a while now
but it’s so hard to strip the dark away
there’s something sinisterly comforting
about staying in here
i never have to see my reflection
and i can pretend i am the person
i used to be
before you

brown and blue used to comfort me
but i just want to start over
i’ve picked a white blue,
like the sky after rain
maybe if i repaint my room
i can rip down the thoughts
you’ve wallpapered to my mind
white
blank
a new page
a fresh start