why don't you like 'em guys

Payday gang gaming headcanons + examples of what they like
  • Dallas: Plays simulator games, I'unno. Game Dev Tycoon/moneymaking type shit.
  • Wolf: Likes a multitude of genres. Probably makes his own considering he's a software developer. Probably makes death houses in Sims 4 on his free time.
  • Hoxton: Usually does board games, mostly due to his time in prison. You could probably organize DnD with him or something. Probably also likes Mario on the down low tbh
  • Chains: ...Arma 3? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ I really don't know. He probably has Call of Duty and only plays it to assblast people online (and to get people angry on purpose). Actually really likes the Fallout series.
  • Houston: Fighting games. Mains Luigi in Smash, and has a burning hatred for people like DSP when playing online matches.
  • John Wick: Do not bring up Nintendogs around the others. Just don't. Let the man take care of his DS doggos in peace.
  • Clover: Largely the same as Hoxton except she has a specialty for tabletop RPGs (specifically grimdark shit). Still angry about Warhammer Fantasy not getting an awesome game on the scale of 40k's Dawn of War.
  • Dragan: Laughing as he plays his role as a brutal cop in GTAV. Normal players hate him with a burning passion.
  • Jacket: Plays on an old-ass NES he's somehow managed to maintain through the years. Often plays shoot 'em up games like Gradius or Xevious as they're "relaxing."
  • Bonnie: Doesn't entirely get video games, but you can see her poke into idle games like Neko Atsume. Gets hilariously frustrated if Tubbs visits.
  • Sokol: [JonTron voice] SPOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORTS. Will kick your ass at air hockey if you ever play him.
  • Jiro: Pretty much the only sane choice in terms of games out of the gang. Poker usually ends with him winning, strip poker has him with everyone else's suits. He gives them back afterwards, though.
  • Bodhi: "Seriously, why don't you guys try some actual extreme sports sometime?" This was said as he casually hid a copy of Tony Hawk's Pro Skater 3 under his shirt. Part of the GLORIOUS PC MASTER RACE.
  • Jimmy: Is the one person insane enough to play Dark Souls on a KEYBOARD while his character is ass naked, and wins.
  • Sydney: Doom, Mortal Kombat, basically anything that has maximum potential for gore. Runs Brutal Doom with the Overdrawn at the Blood Bank setting, and pre-ordered Doom 2016. Secretly likes Touhou games (don't tell anyone).
  • Rust: "what are you talking about" he says as he just casually plays on an old Gameboy, because he didn't really have time to do much in terms of consoles and such. Beat Pokemon Red and actually discovered the Mew trick on his own.

anonymous asked:

Well for fucking starters why don't you study anatomy, switch to a drawing program that doesn't have atrocious color palettes like SAI or Photoshop, study color theory and try doing research on the body types you're drawing. It's pretty obvious you don't use references for your anatomy and until you've actually got a good grasp of the anatomical rules for your art instead of noodles and big arms and legs to be "uwu diverse" try using one. Also, your response makes YOU look like a baby. :^ )

OH GOD

THEY’RE ESCAPING

GET EM, BOYS

WE’VE GOT TO STOP THEM BEFORE THEY-

Oh no…

WE’RE TOO LATE

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Well I am dead now guys if you’re looking for me I’ll be chillin with Jesus

anonymous asked:

you know someone who's middle name is kale

yes i’ve known him for 13 years he’s a plague on my life he’s the guy that knocked my tooth out w a ping pong ball

anonymous asked:

Prompt: Ian asking Mickey about the lesbian porn

// so yeah this went on a tangent because I did backstory. but I hope it’s ok? //

Mickey had realised he was gay around the age he was expected to become obsessed with porn.

Since he was about ten, his father had begun tossing magazines at him, magazines with page after page of skinny girls with soft hips, huge tits and even bigger asses. His dad had just said ‘enjoy.’ Mickey didn’t know what he was supposed to enjoy about these magazines, though.

A couple of years later, and it clicked. His brother - unintentionally - showed him. So Mickey went back to his room and pulled one of the crumpled issues out of his drawer. He opened it randomly and saw a skinny, pale girl with long dark hair and bangs. Mickey turned the page, shuddering. The picture reminded of him too much of Mandy. Then he found a girl with masses of blonde curls and pink lips that smiled teasingly. And he tried. He really did. He stuck his hand in his pants and stared in earnest at the picture. Nothing. He frowned. It had to be the girl. Maybe blonde wasn’t his type. The next page housed a smaller, hispanic girl. He tried again and still, nothing.

Within an hour, he’d exhausted the magazine, plus two others. Mickey threw the third time unlucky across the room and buried his head in his pillow. What the fuck was wrong with him?

-

A year or so later, it was Mandy’s thirteenth birthday. Like with any Milkovich birthday, the family had bought - well, mostly stolen - gifts. Mandy was their little sister and the only girl, though, so Mickey and his brothers had probably tried a little harder than they did for each other. Terry, as always, didn’t know it was her birthday.

'How old now, huh?’ He grunted as he stumbled through the kitchen, still half drunk.

'Thirteen. I told you. Last night,’ Mandy said quietly.

'What happened last night?’ asked Mickey.

Mandy shook her head. 'Nothing,’ she murmured, angrily jabbing a knife into the butter. 'Give me some fucking presents,’ she said, feigning brightness so well that her three brothers didn’t notice something was off.

Mickey had stolen her some perfume from the mall, and made her a shiv. 'So you can defend yourself when I’m not around,’ he explained. She smiled and hugged him tight. He shrank away from her a little, feeling like he was supposed to.

'I love it,’ she told him. Mickey was her favourite brother, though she’d never tell the other two. He smiled back.

Iggy thumped a brown paper bag down in front of her. 'Enjoy sis. You’re a woman now,’ he winked.

She tentatively opened the bag. 'Porn, really?’ she smirked, taking three or four magazines and some DVDs out of the bag. Mickey only caught a glimpse of the magazines from across the table, but they seemed like the girl version of his magazines, ie, naked dudes instead of naked chicks. He felt his breath catch in his throat just glancing at them. The DVDs were unlabelled and looked illegal, but that was nothing new. She raised her eyebrows and slid the stuff back into the bag. 'Thanks,’ she said, awkward but amused.

Mickey couldn’t keep his eyes off the bag all through breakfast.

-

His brothers had gone out, probably to rob some convenience stores, and his dad was cashing welfare checks and then going to get drunk again. Just Mickey and Mandy were left. They cleaned up the kitchen then watched some South Park. Mickey was only half watching.

After the fourth episode ended, his sister got up and grabbed a jacket. 'I’m meeting some friends from school. We’re going to the mall and getting pizza later. See you,’ she said, slamming the door. Mickey walked steadily over to the window and watched her walk away. As soon as she turned the corner, he bolted towards the kitchen, grabbed the bag and went back to his room. He hooked a chair over the door handle, just in case someone came home unexpectedly, and sat on the edge of his bed. He carefully took a magazine out of the bag and opened it.

He got that feeling again, that strange feeling somewhere between his heart and his stomach. And then another feeling in his dick. This was what it was supposed to be, Mickey realised, this is what he was supposed to feel when he looked at those girls. But for him, it was happening with guys.

He didn’t know what this meant. But he couldn’t even focus on anything else; right now, all he could see was the man on the page. Tall, tan. Up to his ears in muscles. He felt himself moaning, and almost automatically reached for his dick. 'Shit,’ he gasped, eyes locked on the photo. Well fuck if this wasn’t the greatest thing he’d ever felt in his life.

-

When he was done, Mickey tried to smooth out the magazine, but realised it was useless. It was obvious that someone had used it. He bit his lip. Mandy wouldn’t miss one, surely? There were three more in the bag. Besides, he’d barely cracked the surface of the magazine in his hand. So he put it in the drawer with his others.

He walked slowly back to the kitchen and put the bag back on the table. As he washed his hands, the back door opened and Iggy entered. 'Hey,’ Mickey greeted his brother, acting casual.

Iggy nodded at him. 'What’s going on, little brother?’

Mickey shrugged, getting a bottle of juice from the fridge. He stood in the doorway, toying with it absently. 'Ig, can I ask you something?’

'Shoot,’ Iggy replied, kicking his boots off and sitting at the table.

Mickey sat opposite, trying to figure out how to phrase it. 'You know the magazines?’

Iggy nodded, reaching into his pocket. 'How many you need?’ he asked, tossing a few magazines of bullets across.

Mickey sighed. 'No - well, sure, thanks - no, I mean the ones with the naked chicks.’

Iggy grinned. 'Yeah?’

Mickey looked down. 'I - I was wondering. What if you liked the ones without naked chicks?’

His brother frowned, not understanding. 'You mean like a regular magazine? Tv guide, rolling stone or some shit?’

Mickey groaned. 'How fucking dumb are you, Ig…no, asshole, I mean the ones you got Mandy. With naked dudes,’ he said quietly.

'Those ones are for girls or for - oh, shit,’ Iggy’s mouth was open as he realised what his brother was saying. 'You’re a homo?’

Mickey froze. 'I - no. I don’t know. Fuck, I’m not. No,’ he stuttered. 'I was just curious, like, what it would mean. If you jerked off to those pictures.’

'You jerked off to them?’

'No,’ he said, far too quickly.

Iggy raised his eyebrows. 'Look, some guys like guys. Some guys like girls and guys. It’s - whatever. It is what it is. But don’t let the neighbourhood find out. And don’t let dad find out.’

'Why? And I’m not - that,’ Mickey muttered.

'Dad fucking hates homos, Mick. You’re too young to remember, but…one time he saw two guys just holding hands. And he just went mad. Beat 'em, pistol whipped 'em. Fucking shot them in the legs.’

Mickey clasped his hands, breathing carefully. He felt sick and panicked. He didn’t want to think about what his dad would do if he’d caught Mickey earlier.

'Don’t you - don’t you hate them too?’ he asked Iggy quietly.

'Fuck, no. I don’t love 'em, I’m not going to dance in a fucking parade with 'em or anything. But I don’t hate 'em. They’ve never done anything to me.’

Mickey nodded. 'So you’re - neutral?’

'Ay, that’s the word.’ The brothers were quiet for a moment. 'Look, Mick, you’re barely fifteen. Whether you are or not, keep quiet about it for your own sake. Trust me on this.’

-

Mickey promptly, albeit reluctantly, got rid of the magazine from his drawer.

Then he began putting posters of girls up on his bedroom wall.

And then he bought some dirty movies and left the discs scattered around his room.

Anyone who looked inside his room would have assumed he was straight as could be. And Mickey desperately wanted them to assume correct.

He told himself he’d only jerked off once to pictures of guys. So it didn’t count.

He conveniently forgot about the many, many failed attempts to jerk off the pictures of girls.

Mickey forced himself to study the pictures. Stared hard at the lips and the breasts. 'This is what you’re supposed to like,’ he muttered as he tried to get hard. 'Come on, you piece of shit,’ he said through gritted teeth.

He laid awake at night, trying again in the dark. When he closed his eyes, and relaxed, it started to work. But then he found himself picturing guys. It’d been months, and those men from the magazine were still burned into his brain. He tried to push them out. 'No, fuck,’ he whispered angrily into his pillow. It was no use. So he stopped. He didn’t want to finish, not to a guy.

Mickey reached for his bedside light and flicked it on. He stared at the naked form of an anonymous woman on the wall beside him. Nothing. Not one fucking thing. He turned the light off and threw himself back onto the pillows in defeat. Mickey was crying.

-

A week later and they were in the living room, in front of the tv. Mickey wasn’t really paying attention; he and Mandy were cleaning and sharpening the family knives. He didn’t know how many there were. He’d stopped counting a long time ago.

Suddenly his Dad shouted angrily at the tv, throwing his crumpled up beer can at it.

'What’s wrong?’ Mandy asked absently.

'Fucking queers,’ Terry growled.

Mickey’s head snapped up. The tv was tuned into CNN. Some state somewhere had legalised gay marriage. There were people holding banners and flags, cheering, dancing. They looked so happy. The camera panned to a couple kissing in celebration. Two men. That’s when his dad lost it completely. But Mickey barely heard the hatred spewing from his father’s mouth. He was fixated on the way they were holding each other, looking into each others eyes. They didn’t seem scared. They were smiling. And they looked like they had no worry anymore. And they were kissing in broad daylight, on tv. Mickey felt an ache somewhere in his chest. The happiness he saw onscreen would never be found on the Southside. Their biggest problem had just been fixed. Mickey’s biggest problem was existing.

His dad whacked him over the head as he walked past, jerking him out of his thoughts. 'Don’t look too long, they’ll turn you,’ he said. 'I’m going to the Alibi,’ he told his kids.

Mickey slowly stood up and turned the tv off. Mandy was looking at him curiously. 'Mick? You ok?’

He frowned. 'Course I am.’

'You know Dad’s a piece of shit? Don’t listen to him about that.’ She paused. 'Its fine if you’re gay. I mean, don’t tell him. But don’t go around thinking it’s wrong or something.’

Mickey stared at his little sister. He wanted to thank her, he wanted to tell her everything, wanted to ask her how she got so cool, wanted to hug her and to cry. But he didn’t. 'You think I’m a fucking faggot?’ he spat at her. 'Shut up.’

'Mick, I -’

'Shut up - shut the fuck up, Mandy,’ he yelled. He stormed off towards his room.

She gave him a moment, then went to stand by his door. 'Mick?’ she said softly. He didn’t answer. She came in. He didn’t have the heart to tell her to fuck off. He was crouched on the floor at the foot of his bed. She carefully sat beside him. 'I don’t know if you’re gay. And I never said you were. But I know that on my birthday, Iggy gave me four dirty magazines, not three. And I know that I found the fourth in the trash.’ He looked at her fearfully. His eyes were heavy with tears, and he couldn’t move. But her eyes were kind. 'C'mere’ she muttered, pulling him into a sideways hug, his head on her shoulder.

They sat quietly for a while. 'I’m not gay,’ Mickey whispered tightly through his tears. Neither of them were convinced.

'Ok. It’s ok,’ she said.

-

The next morning, Mickey woke up to find an old envelope slid under his door. It read 'just in case’, in Mandy’s scrawl. Inside, were the DVDs that Iggy had given her. He almost threw them out right there. But they were blank, like all the other porn DVDs in his room. So he tossed them onto his desk and tried not to think about them.

-

He watched one the next day.

Grabbed one of the many stolen laptops from the kitchen and went back to his room.

Shakily inserted one.

Pressed play.

It was an utter revelation. And he couldn’t stop thinking about it.

But still, he told himself he wasn’t gay. Over and over.

He’d just watched one movie, one time. That didn’t mean anything.

Except it quickly became three movies. Eight movies. He bought more DVDs and beat up the guy who sold them to him, to keep him quiet. Twelve movies. Twenty four movies. A little after that, he stopped counting.

But he still wasn’t gay. This was just something he did for fun. It meant nothing. He didn’t even like guys. He liked girls. He loved girls.

He would never fuck a guy for real. Never. Because he wasn’t gay.

He snapped each DVD in half when he was done and took it to the trashcan outside the supermarket, six blocks over.

He told himself the exercise would do him good.

-

One morning, Mickey woke to find Ian Gallagher in his room. Like with any intruder, he pinned him down and prepared to fuck him up. But for some wild reason he wound up just fucking him instead.

He’d never done it. With anyone.

He’d seen enough of those movies to know what to do.

It felt ridiculously great.

He let the Gallagher kid pound the shit out of him. In a good way.

Being so close to another guy like this - he could smell him, all over. And shit, when Ian pushed his dick into Mickey, when he could feel him there, when he was hurting but happy - he had a short moment free of all the hate that he constantly shackled himself with.

They had barely finished before Terry stumbled in, needing the bathroom. Both boys froze. Thank god Terry was too drunk and high to notice.

As they shrugged their clothes back on, Ian moved like he was going to kiss him. Mickey swerved and told him to fuck off.

He went to get coffee while Ian let himself out. As he drank, the hatred slowly began sinking back in.

He wasn’t gay. They’d never kissed. He’d just fucked Gallagher for fun. To get some.

He wasn’t gay because it didn’t mean anything. It would only mean something if they kissed. So they’d keep hooking up. But they’d never kiss. Mickey would make sure.

Maybe Gallagher was gay - that’s why he wanted to kiss - but Mickey wasn’t gay. And he didn’t want to kiss Ian. Didn’t even think twice about his lips. Didn’t fall asleep thinking about Ian’s mouth. Couldn’t still feel him inside.

Because he wasn’t fucking gay.

-

He kept fucking Gallagher. He couldn’t help himself.

He kept his distance, though. He didn’t talk to him. He didn’t hang out with him. They weren’t friends. They sure as shit weren’t boyfriends.

And Mickey would go home and jerk off. He’d stare at the posters of girls on his wall, but the whole time he’d be thinking of Ian.

He’d recently bought a couple of posters of skinny, flat chested girls with red hair, cut short. And when he dimmed the lights and closed his eyes until they were only slightly open, he could pretend it was Gallagher’s picture.

But it wasn’t. It was a girl. He was getting off to a girl’s picture. So he wasn’t gay.

-

He wound up in juvie again. He told himself he didn’t miss Gallagher.

-

One day, a guy started coming on to Mickey. He was careful, but eventually decided it was fine. Guys in prison fucked all the time. Didn’t mean they were gay.

The guy got him alone. But then two other guys jumped out of the shadows. It had been a setup.

They pounded the shit out of him. Not in a good way.

-

'How’s juvie?’ came Mandy’s voice down the phone.

'It’s fine. It’s juvie,’ he answered blankly.

'Whatever, just trying to make conversation.’ They paused. 'You want me to send you anything?’

'Yeah, smokes and porn.’

'Ok. I’ll figure out where to get your porn, and what kind of smokes -’

'What are you talking about?’

'I -’

'What do you mean, 'your porn’, like it’s different or something? I just need regular porn,’ he barked.

'Mick, for fucks sake, you’re nearly eighteen. How much longer are you gonna keep pretending? I know the porn you like, I know what you like,’ she said, firm but gentle.

'I’m not fucking gay, Mandy,’ he hissed.

'Well. At least you actually said the word,’ she commented. 'What do you want then?’

'Get me girl-on-girl.’

'You - you want lesbian porn?’ she spluttered incredulously.

'Yeah. Regular porn has guys in too. Lesbo porn doesn’t. Now do you believe I’m not fucking gay?’

She sighed. 'I’ll send you the porn, Mickey, but I don’t believe you.’

-

He was out of juvie a couple months later. Overcrowding, good behaviour, whatever.

Ian and Mandy came to get him. Seeing Gallagher felt like being punched in the stomach. He’d changed. He somehow looked hotter. All Mickey wanted was to undress him and fuck him, right there on the sidewalk. He wanted to kiss him. Throw him up against the wall and press their lips hard together and fucking taste him.

But mostly he just wanted to be with Ian. In any way. He’d missed him.

Maybe he was gay.

-

'Can I ask you something?’ said Ian from beside him.

'Sure,’ Mickey said, passing him the shared cigarette.

Ian took a drag, considering. 'It was ages ago. When you were in juvie?’ Mickey nodded slowly. 'I asked Mandy about you. And she said you wanted girl-on-girl porn.’

Mickey took the cigarette back awkwardly. ’ Yeah. Yeah, I asked her to send me some.’

'Why?’

Mickey sighed. 'Do we have to fucking talk about this? Why do you even want to know?’

Ian turned to face him. 'Yeah, we do. I was always curious.’ Mickey frowned. He was quiet, just looking at Ian helplessly. 'You can tell me.’

'I - look at first it was to pretend I wasn’t gay. To Mandy, to the others in juvie. To myself.’ Ian nodded, letting him continue. 'But, then she sent it. It was just pictures. It didn’t turn me on or whatever. But…the girls. They were gay. Or at least pretending to be. Gay - like me,’ he said quietly. Ian was staring at him, somewhere between surprise and sadness. 'And it was like…they were full on gay, the pictures. So fucking open and unapologetic. And I thought, looking at them - people like this. People are cool with this. People get off to this. Not just people - I mean, sure, girls - but loads of guys too. They - they get off to gayness. And I know it’s all fake and whatever…but it was nice. And for the first time…I felt like it was maybe ok. Ok to be gay. I don’t know why it was porn that showed me it was ok, but it did. And I know I was still a closeted little shit for a while after, but I was starting to think it was alright. And it wasn’t wrong…but most of all I actually began to quietly admit it to myself. Looking at it every day, it gave me some hope.’ He paused. 'I know that sounds weird or whatever -’

'No, no,’ Ian stopped him, holding his hand. 'That’s - oh shit, c'mere,’ he murmured, pulling him into a firm kiss. 'I’d never thought about it like that,’ he smiled softly, hugging him. 'Your fucking head, man. I’ll never understand it but I love it,’ he told him.

'Right back at you,’ Mickey said.

Ian laughed. 'Seriously. Thanks for telling me.’ They sat there together for a while. 'That’s kind of awesome, though. Fucking strange, but awesome.’

Mickey shrugged. 'Thank god for lesbians.’

Ian chuckled into his shoulder. 'Thank god for lesbians.’

-

// ok I hope you enjoyed it?! please send me prompts!! :) //

The Outsiders Sentence Starters
  • "Where the hell have you been; do you know what time it is?"
  • "Look, I said I didn't mean to!"
  • ""I didn't mean to", "I forgot". That's all I ever hear from you!"
  • "You can't win. You know that, don't you?"
  • "Shoot, this house ain't dirty. You ought to see my house."
  • "Hate to tell you this buddy, but you have to wear clothes to work. There's a law or
  • something."
  • "You think my old man gives a hang if I'm dead in a car wreck or drunk or in jail or something, he doesn't care but that doesn't bother me."
  • "I don't know, man. It's just like sometimes I have to get out. It's like I'm the middle man in a tug-of-war or something..."
  • "We're all we got left now."
  • "Can't you leave us alone? BE NICE AND LEAVE US ALONE!"
  • "I'm never nice."
  • "Can I interest you in a Coca-Cola or a 7-Up?"
  • "What'd you say, you little shit? What'd you say to me?"
  • "Firey, huh? Just the way I like them!"
  • "God, I didn't know you had this problem with, with yelling in my face."
  • "Look, now don't get wise."
  • "I don't like little kids, just don't like 'em."
  • "Man, I thought New York was the only place to end up in a murder rap, Jesus Christ!"
  • "Hey baby, you wanna see what's hangin'?"
  • "You ever pull a stunt like that again, I'll kill you."
  • "I killed him. I killed that boy."
  • "I think I'm gonna be sick"
  • "You just don't stop living because you lose somebody."
  • "You get tough like me and you don't get hurt. You look out for yourself and nothing can touch you, man."
  • "Why don't you just focus on girls and cars?"
  • "What are you guys Professional heroes or somethin'?"
  • "Get your feet off my chair and shut your trap."
  • "Alright, I'll go. I know when I'm not wanted."
#meninistprobs
  • chad: being a weebrony is the worst man
  • tony: ikr. noone really appreciates meninists or nice guys now... :/
  • chad: yeah like those femenesineist bitches are so crazy man they already have the right to vote so like ??? what else do they want
  • tony: i know man. theyre always opressing us cishet white males. what have we ever done?? we discovered america, we made the world the perfect utopia it is today (-: what have us whitecishetmales ever done wrong???
  • chad: ik man ik it's so fucking unfair I think we should just shoot girls now as well as black ppl
  • chad: like honestly why limit the deaths to black people lets just kill everyone
  • tony: us intelligent nice guy cishet males can survive on our own. who needs thugs and sluts????? not us
  • chad: totally yeah we can totally just have kids from our huge muscles and they'll all be white dudes like us bc we only want respectable people on our utopian planet
  • todd: We came from a female? Ha, a slut has never had me in them. Those girls always try to date me though. Playing games like when they say "hello" and don't want sex? Those sluts all mess with us bros before hoes
  • tony: does anyone know how to get Mountain Dew stains out of my original Hatsune Miku silk body pillow??
  • chad: yeah man just cum on it it'll come right off lemme link u to some hentai
  • tony: I politely asked a girl for nudes?? and she didn't send them to me?? so I told her that she was a slut and she deserved it tbh - I was nice to her. I gave her the right to vote?? and she doesn't send me nudes??
  • todd: Man have you seen the lesbian porn? I love lesbian porn. But I would never be friends with a gay guy. Gotta love that lesbian porn guys.
  • chad: omg gay dudes are so gay it's disgusting get them out of my country
  • chad: and lesbian porn is the best lmao
  • tony: I can't believe that gays have the right to marry?? Like I love lesbian porn, don't even get me started, but them marrying??? disgusting
  • todd: Man let me tell you I just called Nicki a fake skank and this ugly SWJ said that she has a right to dress and act how she wants?? Please, you will not be respected if you act how you wish to. Fucking ugly SWJ and feminazis get out.
  • chad: oh and tony yeah well bitches who don't give u nudes when you ask nicely are total whores man just stab em all
  • tony: This is why we need meninism tbh
  • todd: Don't even get me started on those girls who claim to be lesbians, but won't make out with their friend for me? Like, uh, I'm sorry, you owe me this since I hit on you but you aren't into guys.
  • tony: Like I'm respectful to a girl and I don't stab her, so I kindly ask her for nudes or to make out with her friend?? And she fucking says no? Like without a white cishet male like me, she could probably be dead right now.
  • chad: yeah we are so much more important than girls and so much more entitled and no feminism doesn't exist
  • todd: And like those guys who hit on me?? Like, can't they tell I'm not a fag like them??? I mean I don't swing that way!!!
  • todd: What do you mean that describes what I do to lesbian women
  • tony: We need meninism because when we ask a girl for nudes she says no and we gave her basic human rights, like we deserve nudes.
  • chad: what no way lesbians are different bc they don't exist and they're all doing this for us it's all to entertain us cis straight white males
  • todd: And like, have you seen how women react to me just feeling their boobs? I mean, if you don't want them squeezed, than cover them!
"They could only see to the horizon"
  • Cory: Ferdinand Magellan! What'd he do?
  • Maya: First bull with a last name!
  • Lucas: *derps at Maya*
  • Farkle: First man to circumnavigate the globe.
  • Maya: Who ya gonna believe?
  • Lucas: *derps at Maya*
  • Cory: Everyone thought the world was flat. Why?
  • Lucas: They could only see to the horizon.
  • Riley: They were too scared to go out. They...thought they'd fall off the world. I don't blame 'em.
  • Farkle: *stares at Riley*
  • Cory: Well, what about you guys? What's your horizon line? Write down the one thing in life you consider impossible. Where do you fall off the earth?
  • Kids: *write*
  • Cory: Well it looks like everyone found something pretty easily. That's too bad. Because when you think you can't do something, your world is as flat as a piece of paper.
  • Cory: So crumple 'em up!
  • Kids: *crumple*
  • Cory: Now look at 'em! You hold your world in your hands. Nothing's impossible if you take a shot.
  • Cory: So take a shot.
  • Someone: *to Jason and Percy* gods you guys just whip 'em out and compare already
  • Jason: *compares*
  • Percy: *measures*
  • Jason: Well that solved nothing
  • Jason : Don't worry Leo's like barely three inches aha
  • Percy:
  • Jason:
  • Percy: HEY YO FRANK!
  • Frank: *worried* yeah
  • Percy: How big * puts his hands on Frank's shoulders* is your dick?
  • Frank: *uncomfortable*...why do you ask
  • Jason: Just answer the question
  • Frank: i dunno like seventee-
  • Percy: HOLY SHI-
  • Jason: WHAT
  • Frank: -centimeters
  • Percy: *does the conversion* DAANNNGG ZHHAANGG
  • Frank:
  • Jason:
  • Jason: hey NICO

anonymous asked:

what can i do about the fact that NO guy i feel has ever liked me, it just hurts to know that other girls have guys trippin and hurting over them even when they flat out show they don't care or they use em, mean while i'm here pretty cute and nice (not a doormat tho) and even guys i never talk to calling me "bro" & talking about other girls infront of me some of them were ones i liked, what is it about me like i'm quiet & don't have many friends is that why am not interesting/good enough ?

Fuck these boys and stack your money girl. If you’re in school, get those grades up. Focus on building yourself up and bettering yourself as a person. Focus on making your dreams a reality. Make your life everything you want it to be for YOU. What they or anyone else thinks does not make you. Whether or not guys show interest in you does not determine your worth as a person (especially as a woman). Their opinions literally don’t mean shit. You ARE good enough for whatever you want but you have to believe it. Don’t let what they say or think distort the way you feel about yourself. You are a whole person and do not need them to validate you. They can’t give you anything you can’t give yourself. Stop worrying about them. Best wishes xoxo