why don't i remember the horrificness

105 Days of BroTPs, day 34: Alya and Nathaniel

Photoshop

  • Well first of all they could bond over how much they care about Marinette because trust me, they both care about her a lot, like have you seen the show
  • Also imagine them making a comic book thing together?? Like Alya comes up with the awesome story full of adventure etc like the script in Horrificator, and Nath draws it!! It would be an awesome project and it would turn out so well!!
  • Hey remember that one scene in Puppeteer where Lady Wifi lost her phone so Evillustrator drew a new one for her?? Their akuma selves should totally be friends too (despite what Nath’s daydream universe in Evillustrator episode says)
  • Also Alya could post Nath’s Ladybug fanart on the Ladyblog to get him more exposure, and she could commission him to draw stuff, how awesome would that be?
  • Nath’s really quiet and shy while Alya’s really confident and go-getter, together they’d make an awesome team!!
South Park: Bigger Longer & Uncut : Sentence Starters
  • "Now come on children, don't be shy, just give it your best shot."
  • "What is five times two?"
  • "OK, now lets try to get an answer from someone who's not a complete retard."
  • "I'm Sorry ________, but I don't trust anything that bleeds for five days and doesn't die."
  • "Dude, it's a lady getting pooed on!"
  • "You're too young for this stuff!"
  • "Hey! It IS ________'s mom!"
  • "Dude, what the fuck is wrong with German people?"
  • "Let's start by building a big statue of me, right over there where that fat kid is standing."
  • "Hey, don't call me fat buttfucker!"
  • "Respect my fuckin' authority!"
  • "You need to watch your mouth, brat."
  • "I know I was mean before. But don't worry - I can change!"
  • "Dog-shit taco!"
  • "Oh fuck."
  • "Who's a fuckin' bitch? ________'s Mooooooooom!"
  • "Blame Canada!"
  • "I don't listen to hip-hop."
  • "Haven't you heard of the Emancipation Proclamation?"
  • "I bet him he couldn't do it. I bet him a hundred dollars."
  • "I'm just fuckin' stoked I don't have to pay him."
  • "Oh, that's real nice! He was your friend, you fat fuck!"
  • "Remember what the MPAA says; Horrific, Deplorable violence is okay, as long as people don't say any naughty words!"
  • "Suck my balls."
  • "What the heck is a rimjob?"
  • "I transferred from Yardale where I had a 4.0 grade point average."
  • "It's this V-Chip, I hate it!"
  • "I can't say any dirty words."
  • "And you can't say Shit?"
  • "I'm warning you!"
  • "She's a mean old bitch and she has stupid hair."
  • "________, did you just say the F-word?"
  • "No, he's talking about "fuck". You can't say "fuck" in school, you fucking fat ass!"
  • "Why the fuck not?"
  • "What's the big deal? It doesn't hurt anybody."
  • "How would you like to suck my balls?"
  • "Holy shit, dude."
  • "Get the fuck out of here!"
  • "Notice, that nothing happens."
  • "Success! The child doesn't want to swear!"
  • "Go on, honey. It's all right."
  • "Let me have some candy."
  • "Like you really need all that chocolate."
  • "We accidentally replaced your heart with a baked potato. You have about three seconds to live."
  • "What would Brian Boitano do if he was here right now?"
  • "I'm sure he'd kick an ass or two."
  • "I just want my mom to stop fighting everyone."
  • "For ________, I'll be an activist too."
  • "Some people say that I'm a bad guy, they may be right."
  • "Any minute now I will be born again!"
  • "What if you remain a sandy little butt-hole?"
  • "Hey Satan, don't be such a twit."
  • "Mother Theresa won't have shit on me!"
  • "Man, this movie gets better every time I see it!"
  • "I'll bet you a hundred dollars you can't light a fart on fire."
  • "This stick is on fire!"
  • "Oh my God, you killed ________!"
  • "You bastard!"
  • "How come you always want to make love to me from behind?"
  • "Is it because you want to pretend I'm somebody else?"
  • "Who am I going to pretend you are, Liza Minelli?"
  • "Sure, hon."
  • "Wait, before we put a message out, do a search on the word clitoris."
  • "It isn't like this film is the first troublesome thing to come out of Canada. Let us not forget Bryan Adams."
  • "Now, now, the Canadian Government has apologized for Bryan Adams on several occasions!"
  • "Can I finish? Please, can I finish?"
  • "I think we're fighting Canadians."
  • "Canadians, Australians, what's the difference?"
  • "Fuck is the worst word that you can say."
  • "Fuck Canada!"
  • "Hey fuck you buddy!"
  • "Well, fuck my ass and call me a bitch."
  • "I want to know where you heard all this horrific obscenities, m'kay?"
  • "I seriously doubt that ________ ever said: "Eat penguin shit, you ass spelunker"."
  • "Well you fucked your uncle yesterday."
  • "Goodbye, you guys."
  • "You told us that windows 98 would be faster, and more efficient with better access to the internet!"
  • "What do you think this is kid?"
  • "The word is "forensics"."
  • "Cancer is killing, Texaco's spilling, the whole world's gone to hell, but how are you?"
  • "I'm super! Thanks for asking!"
  • "Looks like we may be out of luck."
  • "Don't kick the baby."
  • "Hold me."
  • "Why should we fucking have to spell forensics?"
  • "There is no hope now, you must get out of here."
  • "Were is your God when you need him, huh? Where is your beautiful, merciful faggot now?"
  • "We can't leave without you! We don't know where the hell we are!"
  • "I can't face my mother."
  • "Our freedom shall be won."
  • "Though I die... La Resistance lives... on..."
  • "SHIT!"
  • "What the fuck are they fighting for?"
  • "When did this song become a marathon?"
  • "Here I come, God. Here I come, you fucking rat."
  • "Is sex the only thing that matters to you?"
  • "I hope you've learned something from this whole experience."
  • "Wanna see the northern lights?"
  • "You burned yourself to death by lighting your fart."
  • "You MUST shut of the alarms!"
  • "I fucking hate guard dogs!"
  • "I heard you the first time you British piece of shit."
  • "This is worse than the time when I fell asleep and you put your dick in my mouth and took a picture."
  • "The sun is shining and the grass is green. Under the three feet of snow, I mean."
  • "It's been six weeks since Saddam Hussein was killed by a pack of wild boars and the world is still glad to be rid of him."
  • "That movie has warped my fragile little mind."
  • "What? Fuck you guys. I wanna get out of here."
  • "I saw the __________ movie. Now who wants to touch me?"
  • "Now keep in mind, 'Operation Human Shield' will suffer heavy losses. But don't lose your spirit men! Stay until the bitter end."
  • "Ah, you'd better get packing, bitch, we're running out of time."
  • "What? No? No! You can't do that! I have to go to Earth!"
  • "Thank you Clitoris!"
  • "Careful? Was my mother careful when she stabbed me in the heart with a clothes hanger while I was still in the womb?"
  • "Man, this kid is fucked up!"
  • "Last words? How's about: "Get me the fuck out of this chair!" How's that for last words?"
  • "Did you bring the buttfor?"
  • "What, is that like finding Jesus or something?"

anonymous asked:

OK, so the other day I heard "Apartment Four" by They Might Be Giants and I thought it would make an adorable Shitty/Lardo band AU. You may ask yourself: Isn't that a kids' song? Why yes, yes it is, but consider this: You don't know me / But I remember when you / Moved into flat number two / That was the day that I knew / That I was not the only one / Who might like the drum / That was shaking the floor / Of apartment four.

So true facts, I once lived in this horrifically sketchy apartment and my upstairs neighbour was a long haired, pot smoking bro who introduced himself as Benford and to this day I have no idea which part of his name that was, and all five of the upstairs people were in a band and they would practice at like three in the morning and they were terrible, so I have some Emotions about this prompt. But anyway.


Larissa likes her new apartment. The building is in a cool part of town, there’s a lot of artists, and when she’d been moving in, some guy had hung out the fire escape to welcome her to the building. He had long hair and a glorious moustache and had been wearing nothing but cargo shorts even though this is Cambridge and it’s November, but Larissa wasn’t one to judge.

The only thing Larissa doesn’t like about her new apartment is whoever the hell her upstairs neighbour is. The person plays the drums. That’s all she knows about them. They play the drums, they have no rhythm, or rhythm like they’re a somewhat stoned sloth, and they keep playing at weird hours like six in the morning.

Larissa just wants to paint. She doesn’t want to have to confront her new neighbours on her third day in the building.

But when she wakes up on the fourth day at 6:07 because her dickhead upstairs neighbour is play the drums, she can’t take it anymore.

Ignoring the fact that she’s wearing teeny tiny shorts that her best friend had purchased for her and an oversized shirt that had once belonged to her best friend before she appropriated it, she storms up the stairs and pounds on the door to apartment four. After a moment, the drumming stops and the door opens to reveal the gloriously moustached man from the day she was moving in.

“Huh,” he says, glancing at her shirt. “Didn’t figure you for a hockey fan.”

“Would you stop playing the fucking drums at six in the fucking morning?” she demands, because she doesn’t have the patience for this nonsense.

“Sorry brah,” he says. “Helps me stop from beating my head against a wall.”

Larissa knows that feeling, but that doesn’t mean she has a lot of sympathy for him either.

“You’re a shitty drummer,” she says.

To her surprise, he bursts out laughing. “That’s totally my fucking name, bro!”

“What is?” Larissa asks.

“Shitty,” he says. “But actually though. Everyone calls me Shitty. Have since high school.”

“Seriously?” Larissa asks, because she understands that feeling too, since she’s known typically as Lardo.

“Yeah,” Shitty says.

“What do you have to do that makes you want to bash your head into walls?” Lardo asks, because despite herself, she’s starting to warm up to him.

“Oh, I’m a law student at Harvard,” Shitty says all casually like he’s not standing in his doorway in red boxer briefs talking to a complete stranger. Like he doesn’t have a moustache straight from the 1920s and long hair. Like his apartment doesn’t reek of pot. “It’s kind of awful though because most of them don’t give a shit about how important intersectionality is to feminism and think the sun shines out of every white girl’s ass if she says she’s a feminist, and the ones who do understand intersectionality on some level are fucking TERFs.”

Larissa stares at him because she has no words for this.

“But sorry about the drumming bro. And hey, if you ever wanted to stop by sometime and jam that would be fuckin’ swaweseome.”

He’s kind of cute, she realises. His hair is a nice shade of brown, and she’d have to put a lot of red into it to capture the colour properly. His eyes are actually a very pretty shade of green. She kind of wants to paint him.

“What about you drum and I paint you,” she suggests.

“Oh, bro, sick, are you an artist?” Shitty asks, babbling a mile a minute as he follows her down to her apartment so she can get her paint and a canvas. She doesn’t know how she’s going to capture his extensive speaking in a silent picture. She’ll figure something out. But she thinks she might like spending more time with him regardless. 

Half a thought that’s still developing. Half a thought that started developing when I first saw this post.

In a world as dark as Night Vale, you deal with it with the brightest lights and colors you have. You stand with your neighbors in solidarity and mourning after the street cleaners. You give equal precedence to love as you do death in your life. You cheer on the underdogs and children born as hands. You react with kindness and sympathy and rage because you are not dust.

I think it’s important to remember that there is more to Night Vale than a dystopia, and it’s important to remember that it serves to make the good things that much brighter. It makes the bad things that much darker. It is absurd and it is horrific sometimes, but they never forget the important, beautiful parts that keep them going.