why does everyone read my tags :(

Shoutout to demi people who don't love their orientation

Sometimes it gets frustrating that you’re not “normal”

“A good horror story will frighten us, yes. It will keep us awake at night, it will make our flesh crawl, it will creep into our dreams and give new meaning to the darkness. […] Good horror stories make us look at our reflections in dark distorting mirrors, where we glimpse things that disturb us, things that we did not really want to look at. Horror looks into the shadows of the human soul, at the fears and rages that live within us all.” –GRRM

I reached the horror section of Dreamsongs a couple days ago and let me tell you, I am NOT looking forward to whatever dark trip GRRM is taking us on in TWOW. Just kidding, I need it more than ever!! GRRM knows how to tap into something primal and beam it directly into my nightmares. (I feel very uneasy about crabs right now.) 

Horrifying imagery aside, GRRM’s real strength is emotional horror. Beautiful things like love, and courage, and friendship, and hope die faster than Ned Stark when GRRM writes horror. Jealousy and hatred and rage win when GRRM writes horror. (Anyone else thinking “valonqar” right now because I am…. I keep saying it, the Lannisters are horrifying, and I love them.)

For example, I read GRRM’s “Meathouse Man” and the stories are very different, but I felt a resonance with Tyrion’s storyline:  

“Of all the bright cruel lies they tell you, the cruelest is the one called love.”

Keep reading

whY noT
  • everyone else: don't--
  • me: what do you mean I can't watch,fangirl,cry about my anime,read fanfics that are over 100K words,feel attacked after seeing a NOTP in an OTP tag,cry, screaming over official fan art,freaking about upcoming seasons, howl about character development,crying about ships,screaming,fangirling,screaming,reading hundreds of doujinshis,making 7 thousand fan accs(one for each anime),realize that it is 1am and I need to sleeP,have anxiety,cry over how hot anime ppl are,scream,die when a ship does something supEr gAy,buy a shit ton of anime merch,make "protection squads",join an anime cult, screAm my life story,have posters all over my walls, have a shrine devoted to your OTP,cry about how you have more than 7,000 ships,form depression from an angst fic,sing theme songs, scream "gAY" in public, and cry about how fucked up my life is???

anonymous asked:

Okay so like trans girls exist so like stop being transphobic? Female is a sex by a gender unless you're cis so way to exclude trans girls

How was I being transphobic, or excluding trans girls? Trans girls are girls, so they can read the fics labeled “female” just as easily as a cis girl can. I just say “female,” because that includes anyone who identifies as a female. Wouldn’t you be the transphobic one, assuming that trans girls can’t be considered girls?

So the reason why I tag my stuff is for easier access to old posts I want to read(pretty sure everyone does honestly) so I went into this particular tag of mine and…wow. Past events really show there.

It’s nothing bad, it’s just the deal with why this character, this blog and my current choices exist in the first place. Long story short, I had this fallout with a friend early August of last year. She was, pretty much a huge deal to me and we were good friends despite barely knowing each other for a year. I thought we clicked pretty well, we talked for hours, on Mumble, Skype, etc. However, she suffered from a mental illness that was and hopefully is now being treated. To this day I don’t even know what it exactly is because she wouldn’t talk about it, to anyone, but it severely affected her life and how she acted around her friends. I can go into huge detail on what transpired, but I’ll spare it because it’s done and over with it. As far as I know she doesn’t have a blog anymore and even if she did she’s already made her mistakes and won’t show up. (hopefully never again) Anyway, her mental health was out of control that one fateful day she just, put a beatdown on me, who was recovering from mental instability myself. She was mad at me, blamed me, demanded me to make it up to her and pay for trying to take time for myself. That made me angry, and pretty much drove me away.

For the next 2-3 months after that I was terrified, upset, paranoid, angry. I felt isolated from everyone because I thought what I was doing to help her was the right thing to do, by avoiding my FC, my friends so she could stay with them. But in the end I only beated myself in and she did not improve. You know my white miqote Sho? He was my main up since I started FFXIV. He was very first OC I made in this game and his career pretty much ended with Heavensward. He was in a relationship with their OC, but it turned out to be more than Sho and I could handle. It started to no longer be fun, I admit I was really bad at communication, but the thing is I was also terrified to talk to her because I knew what she was capable of. And well it all eventually fell apart.

The moment I took Sho away, retired him, etc. It was over. The friendship was over from the start, but me taking away Sho was permanent damage. Am I still upset over it? No, she disrespected me and made me feel obligated to do things for her because I was her friend. Just something to remind you all about: Friends should never feel obligated to do anything for friends, or even expect it.

I was upset that I lost Sho. I mean I created him from level 1 and leveled him all the way to the end of Heavensward. Now he’s doing a lot better, but the damage is obviously there. I guess you can’t really understand it until you felt it. But instead of mulling about it I created Svan sometime in the Spring of last year. And needless to say despite my own currently ups and downs, she’s a huge symbol to me overcoming this hurdle in my life.

So I guess, don’t give up. Don’t allow yourselves to be caught in a vicious toxic cycle. If you lose a friend it’s probably meant for the best. But just remember to love yourselves and love the friends who choose to stay with you. And don’t hate, just walk away. It’s unnecessary and no one needs that

A beginner’s guide to LL fics

Fantastic fics and where to find them

Main pairs
Nozoeli: smut, lots of aus, smut, occasional angst, smut, some diabetic fics, smut
Where found: everywhere, blogs with Nozomi/eli in their url

NicoMaki: tons of hospital aus, so much ooshima tomo ref, smut, fight fight fight, ooshima tomo, fight more, smut
Where found: everywhere, blogs with Nico/maki in their url

KotoUmi: angst, unrequited love, angst, somebody dying, angst, more deaths, angst
Where found: depends on your luck that day, maybe be found on the side of the road

Rinpana: if you’re lucky they get inserted as side pairing, does not exist
Where found: Deep into the abyss of hell

Others
MakiPana: for the weak hearted who needs fluff 
where found: @ask-tomato-and-rice, floopers, u all know where

Rinmaki: either very tragic or diabetes inducing, weird combination 
where found: u all know where

Nicotori: v v attractive ship tbvh i think its the fanart
Where found: @tachimirii (no fics :,))) ), @shotgun-to-your-heart 

Kotomaki: you think you will never ship them but 
where found: @in-perfect-silence

UmiNico: v v cute ship bc look imagine nico getting 2nd hand embarrassment because Umi is blushing
where found: uminico tag, ocean 25 tag, does not exist anywhere else, if you’re lucky you get 2 fics

Nozoumi: does not exist beyond your imagination

NicoPana: they are too cute together and writers who write them dies from fluff which is why they have no fics
where found: maybe in some random prompts on tumblr

NicoEli: pls spend your saturday reading saturday plans
where found: @huesofthemorning

Nozonico: everyone lowkey ships the third years do not lie
where found: WE ARE CURRENTLY RECRUITING MEMBERS, it is always that annoying saberin blog

anonymous asked:

I was going through your selfies, and you have so much acne you can't see in the photos but I bet up close your blackheads are disgusting why does anyone reblog you

yea, I do have acne! 

and I’ve got a lot of black heads too, you are very right about that! My camera kind of hides them honestly, even in the photo below. 

but you see, acne isn’t a bad thing at all. It just is. And there isn’t really anything a lot of us can do about it. 

So by asking this, u were just being a mean person. Trying to insult me by commenting negatively on something that I can’t really change is just fucking rude. 

insulting someone because of something they were born with, says a shit ton more about you, than it does about them. Remember that

and I don’t know why anyone rebloops my selfies, but I am very greatful to them for it, and reading there tags quite often makes my day. They are wonderful. 

quite, unlike, um, your rudeness. 

To anyone else reading this, don’t ever be ashamed of you acne because of assholes like this. My acne used to be so so much worse than it is now holy heck, and it was one of my biggest insecurites and gahh. 

But your acne is beautiful and adorable, just like you. Fudge everyone else. 

Seriously this is fucking ridiculous. Every damn day there is someone screaming “QUIT HATING ON LOUIS” and every other damn day there is someone screaming “QUIT HATING ON HARRY”. Nobody is fucking hating on anybody. It is called having a discussion. If you are not capable of talking about things that are happening in this band, without accusing someone of hating on someone, then you need to grow the fuck up. I love Harry and I love Louis. But I am allowed to wonder what the fuck is going on with them seeing as I have been supporting them for years. I am also allowed to praise them when they do something amazing just as I am allowed to be disappointed when they don’t. That is how it works when you care about someone. On top of that I refuse to turn a blind eye to things that are happening with this group just to make myself and others feel better. I live in reality. I don’t want to be lied to and I don’t want to pretend things are perfect if they are not. I don’t know what is going on with this band, so until I do, I am going to have discussions about it, or I am going to write in my tags my opinion on the matter seeing as it is my damn blog and everyone is just going to have to get over it. I don’t go to your blog telling you how to blog, so don’t come to mine telling me how to do it. Thank you and have a lovely day.