why do you have to be so far

bowandbat  asked:

Most people have questions about writing a "strong female character", but I'm having the opposite problem. My character is a male in his 30's and is the love interest pining after the unattainable main character, but so far he's just...flat. I want him to be well rounded and interesting, and play a major role in the plot, but he's coming across as the "pretty boy" that doesn't really contribute anything. Do you have any suggestions for creating a male character thats not a cliche or bad trope?

There are a multitude of reasons why a character my end up falling flat, and I can see a few reasons just based on your question why your male, love interest character may not be developing as well as you would like. There are certainly other possibilities as well, but I don’t want to overwhelm you with too many. If these thoughts aren’t working for you, then let me know and we can try again, but for now, here are a few reasons why your character may be flat, and ways that you can help him with that problem.

1. Your character is less a character and more of a category.

I was listening to a story the other day, it might have been on NPR or one of the YouTube news stations I have started watching since the last Presidential election, but they made an interesting point that I had not though about when it comes to political candidates. What they were saying is that sometimes a candidate becomes less of a person and more of a label. So in the case of Hillary Clinton, a lot of the focus of her as a candidate was on the fact that she was a woman. A similar thing happened with Barak Obama. He was the “black candidate” for some people. What this does in the political realm is to remove certain human elements from that person and making it easier to ignore them if you don’t like them already. The same thing can happen for a character. Think about all of those romantic leads that just fall flat. It’s because they have stopped being a living breathing character and have become the “love interest.” But how do you fix this problem without scrapping the character?

1b. Remove the label.

Instead of thinking about your character as the love interest, find ways to think about them as just a character that has a chance to get into a relationship with your main character. What are some of the ways that they connect with each other? What interests do they have in common? What do they not like about each other? Dig deep into the characters and their relationship. (But please do not make them fight just to build the tension and the “will they/won’t they” nonsense.) When you focus on creating a character instead of a love interest, you can often avoid this trap.

1b (note)

Please be aware that when you follow the steps in the previous section, there is a chance that you characters may not mesh as a couple. You can force this to happen, but I would not suggest it.

2. Talk to some people about your character.

When you try to create a character in a vacuum, then you have the risk of missing out on some important details because you are so focused on what you know about the story, that you might miss some of the details that are right in front of you. This may mean that your character is not as flat as you might think. (It also means that he may be even flatter than you originally thought.) How do you find a way to avoid this flatness? Talk to some people about your characters.

2b. How does that look?

There are a few ways that you can do this, but the main goal is to talk about your characters with people that you trust to give you some honest feedback. First, you can hand someone a copy of a scene he is in and ask them for feedback, but that can be difficult to do if you aren’t used to sharing your writing. Next, you could just give the person a description of your character and ask the person if they are interested in knowing more about them. Both of these options can work well if you are willing to put your work out there for others to see. A third option would be to pretend that you character is someone that you just met and talk about them as if they were someone that you actually know. In this scenario, your friends will not know that you are talking about a character and you can see how they feel about them that way.

3. Is your love interest in the “friend zone?”

OK, let me take a moment to say that they “friend zone” is a lie. It’s just something to make yourself feel better when you create an uncomfortable situation with someone that you are interested in. Typically what you get is a guy that tries to invest himself into the life of someone that he likes in order to create a relationship. This may even include doing things for this person that they are interested in regardless of the circumstances or relationship status. Basically, the guy is “putting in his time” until the girl realizes that he is the right one for her because he is always there for her. If things don’t work out, then the guy typically gets offended. This may be a situation where your character is at. A “friend zone” person will often dampen their own personality in order to better match the person that they are interested in. If that is the case with your character, then they would certainly feel flat.

3b. How do you even fix that?

Get your character out of the “zone.” If he is interested in the girl, then he either needs to say something about it or just be her friend. That does not mean that he does things just because she likes them or wants him to tag along. He needs to have his own life and priorities. If you want a well rounded character, then he needs to have times where he just can’t drop everything for her. Better yet, just let them be friends for a while and see when things go.

Hopefully that answered your question. If not let me know.


anonymous asked:

why do you think that some bisexual people feel like they have to have experience before they can call themselves bi? I mean when we all thought we were straight and virgins, we didn't think that we had to have sex to know we were straight. we just were.

The short answer: internalised biphobia.

The long answer: bisexual people get questioned about their sexuality all the time, people doubt us and some even go as far as saying “bisexuality doesn’t exist”. We get this both from straight and gay people, so we have internalised this form of biphobia that makes us feel like we constantly have to prove ourselves to be Queer Enough™ and get people to believe us.


little-babybat  asked:



anonymous asked:

That green friday sale you had was so weak like $4.20 doesnt even cover shipping lmao that's why you're out here begging for sales

You say begging, I say advertising and blogging 🤷 As far as the discounts not being up to your standards, I’m *not* sorry you feel that way. I do what I can for my customers, when I can. I’m a very small business, not General Mills. I gave $210.80 total in discounts this week. That’s $210.80 out of (surprise) my own pocket this week - my birthday week. So no $4.20 or free shipping might not have seemed like a big deal to you but it was to me. Please do us both a favor and never purchase from me (again?) Thanks asshole!

Originally posted by qaradise

the thing about Bakugou is that, in the limits that his personality allows, he’s soft for Kirishima - he calls him by name, listens to him and always answers him, tries to help him out as best as he can, accepts his help when Kirishima offers it, actively works to make him feel better when he’s down, never yells at him unless it’s an answer to Kirishima’s teasing, has no problems in complimenting him and pointing out his strength, he’s soft for Kirishima

he openly considers him a friend and treats him as such, he cares and doesn’t really try to hide it, though his inexperience in showing that sort of feelings does make him come off as awkward now and again 

I guess what I mean to say is it’d be nice if the fandom could remember that, instead of writing him as angry and prickly and downright offensive and uncaring when dealing with what has been recognized by the canon as his best friend and someone he does enjoy the company of over and over again

Sometimes I miss you more than I love you. And if I close my eyes and think hard enough, you’re right there next to me. Smiling that goofy smile that I love so freakin much. And then i can hear your voice promising me we’re going to be okay. And I believe it, even with tears in my eyes, I believe you.

Can’t go to Interactive Introverts because your parents said no/will say no? This is for you!

Hello everyone, my name is Paige, and I am really freaking good at convincing parents of things. I grew up with two very strict and overprotective (though loving and awesome) parents, and so I’ve had the perfect life experience to give you this advice. Buckle up.

Are you a fan of Dan and Phil, who is super excited about their oncoming tour, Interactive Introverts, but your parents won’t let you go? Here is how to convince them you should. (Most of these also work for other special trips, such as going to a concert.)

Please reblog this so it can reach all the people who need it :D

Step-by-step guide under the cut!

Keep reading

It’s Just a Nickname

“Phone, phone, where the CATS is my phone?” Adrien hissed to himself as he rummaged through his gym bag. Fencing had just let out and he needed to call Nathalie to let her know where he was—given how often he’d been disappearing lately, he wasn’t entirely surprised at how paranoid she’d become. But his phone was missing. Had he dropped it somewhere? Ugh, she was going to kill him.

“Looking for this?” said a familiar voice from behind him.

Adrien turned, and there—to his immense surprise—stood Alya Cesaire, dangling his phone precariously between two fingers.

He snatched it from her hand before she could drop it. “Merci a Dieu,” he breathed. “Where did you find it?”

Alya stared at him, then began to laugh. “FIND it?” she giggled. “You seriously still think you lost it?”

“What do you mean?”

Alya tossed her hair over her shoulder. “This is, like, the fourth time Marinette has left you an embarassing voicemail and had to steal your phone to delete it before you can hear it.”

Adrien nodded, sliding his phone into… wait, what?


She’d been leaving him voicemails?

Why would she be doing that? They weren’t that close, as far as he could tell. She was a friend, he supposed, but she barely acknowledged him, to the point of barely ever speaking to him even if she went out of her way to talk to everyone else in the class. Was she trying to prank him? If so, it was poorly executed, because he hadn’t noticed. And why keep stealing his phone? What was the point?

“What did the voicemail say?” he found himself asking.

Alya grinned and pointed at the phone. “You’ll just have to see for yourself, loverboy.”

“What do you mean? Didn’t you delete it?”

Alya shook her head. “Not this time,” she said. “Marinette was too busy screaming.”

Adrien raised an eyebrow. Screaming? What? Why would Marinette…

Oh. Oh no.

“So I’ve got a question for you…” Alya began, barely audible beneath the rushing pulse in Adrien’s ears. He opened his phone screen.

New Message From:

Oh, cats. Cat in a Camembert Trashcan.

“Why do you have Marinette’s number saved as ‘Princess’ on your phone?”


Me: I need to stop beginning new multi-chapter fanfics and focus on the ones I’m already writing

The dwarf who lives in my brain: Sounds like elf talk, my boy!

anonymous asked:

Do you have a theory about Marco's moon marks on his cheeks?

Since he made a callback to the Blood Moon just second before using magic, it might be related to it. It’s a crescent moon, after all.

Or they’re supposed to be moons partially obscured by a lunar eclipse and something fucky is going on with Eclipsa.

We know next to nothing about magic and cheekmarks, but according to the Guide to Dimensions they’re an after effect of prolonged magic usage in the Butterfly family. Still, one has to wonder why we have never seen a man sporting marks so far, while several of Star female relatives, who probably never used magic in their lives, have them.

is there a deeper meaning to Marco getting them? Was it just a way to remind us of the Blood Moon? Is it something normal for people who use magic? We saw Ludo using the wand (even if a cleaved one), and obviously nothing happened to his face. 
Beyond bruises. I have no answers nor theories right now, just doubts and confusion.
What I can say with a moderate degree of certainty is that Marco is not related to Star, unless Daron hit her head super hard while watching Game Of Thrones and Disney suddenly decided to tackle the themes of incest in one of their shows.

Ravenclaw Headcanon

Ravenclaws love and hate ambient noise. It needs to be a specific kind of noise depending on what they’re doing, and if it varies too far from the ambient noise they wanted, they just find it distracting.

OK wait, Jeremy has been the captain of the Klance ship since day one and then he says one comment about them having a brotherly bond and now you all are going after his head?? You’re acting like he said he hates Klance or something. Jeremy saying that they’re pretty much as close as brothers right now is showing such an important and crucial point in their relationship, like how far they’ve come since season one.

The whole team is a family people, they all look at each other as brother and sister since they’ve been through so much together. I don’t understand why people have to take everything so out of context like it’s meant to be offensive, and then force their anger onto VAs and show runners. Do you really think that your ship is going to become anymore canon if you act like a disrespectful, immature child to them? Let people have an opinion without exploding over it, Jeremy literally said nothing wrong and you all are just wasting your time getting pressed about it. Please stop making this fandom even more messed up than it already is. 

anonymous asked:

This may be old hat, but I have seen people talk about how Shiro clearly favors Keith to the detriment of other team members. Namely, Lance. I don't feel like this very IC, but I wanted to get other opinions and I enjoy your meta.

This is something in fanon that’s always kind of bothered me honestly. I have a whole meta here about how Shiro protects Lance and cares for him throughout Sendak’s takeover. I honestly don’t understand how people could say Shiro doesn’t care enough about Lance when Shiro was literally willing to get captured and tortured again for his sake. “But that was one time!” some fans will say. As if putting your life on the line and getting a few thousand volts of electricity surging down your spine isn’t a big deal apparently?? Shiro cares for Lance, he does. He could’ve won that fight, but he threw it for Lance’s sake. 

Something that I repeatedly see people cite as a sign Shiro “favors” Keith over Lance is their talk before the BOM. Shiro decides he’s going to take Keith with him, and Lance lashes out. He claims Keith is unable to stay calm, and yet, he’s the one losing his temper. And this is only the latest in a long line of instances in which their supposed “rivalry” is really just a one-sided game where Lance is the instigator and Keith repeatedly has to remain calm and either try to make peace or just tune him out. Throughout season 2, he really snaps back. In contrast, Lance has demonstrated again and again that he is childish and self-centered, that he himself has a quick temper. And yet, he’s quick to direct the blame at Keith. Who handles it quite gracefully, might I add.

So yeah, anyway, Shiro was right. It was a good call to bring Keith instead of Lance. But because Lance is often placed upon a pedestal, somehow not coddling him 24/7 can be misconstrued as abuse. I think another reason people are so quick to say Shiro doesn’t treat Lance the way he deserves is because he doesn’t talk Lance through all his insecurity issues. But you know what? If Lance wants to talk about it, then he has to bring it up. The only two people that have actually addressed that directly are Allura and Keith. And both of them only do so after Lance brings it to their attention. If Lance doesn’t speak up or keeps up an act, how is Shiro supposed to see the signs and help? 

More importantly, people act as though all of Lance’s insecurities are somehow Shiro’s fault. Why is that? Shiro has been imprisoned and tortured for a year. His PTSD and consequential paranoia, depression, and anxiety are far more difficult to deal with than Lance feeling upstaged. And yet, Shiro would never presume that this was somehow everyone else’s burden, or that they owed him more because of it. So why should Lance merit special treatment? Yes, Shiro isn’t as attentive with Lance and Hunk. But that’s because they’re so much more well adjusted. 

I don’t mean this badly, it’s just a fact. They came from good, loving homes. Hunk feels fondly enough about his family to want to return, and seems to have no baggage associated it. Lance meanwhile we know was the youngest sibling and somewhat spoiled. They had it good before. There’s nothing wrong with that. Characters don’t have to have traumatic backstories to be deep or meaningful. But this also means that these two aren’t dealing with the same shit as Keith and Pidge. They don’t have Keith’s abandonment issues or the shared grief he and and Pidge feel over losing their family. These two need more reassurance and guidance and comfort, and Shiro is of course there to provide it. 

Bizarrely enough, it also feels like fans are unable to believe that Shiro has friends. Lance treats Hunk significantly better than Keith from day one, and in fact forces his personal vendetta on Keith for purely selfish reasons. But Keith is expected to graciously accept this because “it’s just from Lance’s insecurities.” Meanwhile, Shiro clearly has nothing against Lance and has never singled him out or treated him poorly out of nowhere. Yet he’s accused of favoritism. This favoritism is really just friendship. He knew Keith before Kerberos, was so close with him he literally brought Keith to the launch instead of his own family. They’ve clearly been side by side for a long time, long enough for Keith to develop an intense desire to be with him when he shuts out everyone else. Long enough for Shiro to not be surprised that it’s Keith of all people who shows up to save him. 

Romantic or not, “Shiro and Keith have the closest relationship.” In Joaquim’s own words, that’s canon (source). So of course their interactions will be different from everyone else’s. That gravity and vulnerability is unique to them alone. And honestly? Removing that link is clearly detrimental to both their coping mechanisms. I think it’s selfish for people to expect Shiro to either push Keith away or pull everyone else in. He’s not ready for something like that, and it shouldn’t be forced on him. Everyone else is allowed to have best friends or romance or whatever’s happening here. Why can’t Shiro? Why is that so wrong? And, to take this in another direction–were Lance to somehow become Black Paladin, does that mean he has to distance himself from Hunk? That he can’t still be interested in Allura? No, I don’t think so. 

And I mean, Shiro does trust Lance, you know? He does still take Lance’s input into account. When Lance says he wants to try to make that impossible shot in Beta Traz, Shiro lets him. Shiro trusts him. And when he makes it? Shiro compliments him! And the reaction is immediate–Lance is clearly thrilled. So yes, Shiro does think Lance is capable of great things. Yes, Shiro lets Lance know when he does a good job and wants to be supportive of him. That much is clear.

I think the other reason why people assume Shiro is somehow biased against Lance because he made Keith Black Paladin instead. And, I’m going to be completely straightforward here–the idea of Black Paladin Lance just makes no sense to me. Neither in the narrative nor thematically and it certainly doesn’t fit with his character development. The thing is, I think people have lost sight of what Black Paladin really means. It’s not a popularity contest. It doesn’t mean you’re the “best” and you shouldn’t just want your fav to have that spot. Lance is far more suited to the role of a Red Paladin, as reflected in his parallels with Alfor, his talk with Allura, and his character arc. To quote my other meta:

It’d be a huge setback and really detract from his character development. When he sits in the Black Lion for “like half a varga” Lance’s main motivation here is seeking his own glory. His character arc is about learning to grow past that and see the bigger picture and realize everyone in Voltron is part of a whole and you’re not better because you’re the leader. 

The way he treated Keith earlier in that episode was also incredibly malicious considering the guy was grieving the loss of the person he loved most. And Lance still has the audacity to spit on Shiro’s last “dying” will and continually provoke Keith until he lashes out or leaves. Learning to see the wrong in that and instead supporting Keith was a huge step for him, and I don’t see why he’d ever still take Black after that. 

It also makes no sense thematically. When Keith steps into Black again, he says, “I know this is what you wanted for me, Shiro. But I’m not you. I can’t lead them like you.” And Lance just goes, “This is your moment.” Keith’s concern first and foremost is with what Shiro wanted and what’s best for the team. Lance just wants to steal the spotlight. He has no intrinsic connection to the Black lion through his bond with Shiro the way Keith does. He also doesn’t have those thematic parallels to Zarkon the way Keith does–instead, he’s recognized as being very similar to Alfor. 

People act like Shiro and Keith stole away Lance’s chance at leadership, but Shiro wasn’t even considering anyone else. Lance was never even in the running. 

The thing is, I kind of understand where people are coming from. To my knowledge, a lot of fans find Lance to be the most relatable, and reflect on him–likewise, I often do this with Keith. But anyway, people really feel for Lance and see their own insecurities through him. But that still doesn’t mean everyone should drop everything to immediately focus on him. Shiro is a good leader. Shiro cares about all of his paladins. Shiro by no means has anything against Lance. But that doesn’t mean he should be given the spot as Black Paladin just because he’s Lance, or that Shiro should be micromanaging his and the other paladins’ emotional needs 24/7 when he’s just trying to get by himself. I understand people feeling for Lance and wanting to see him reach his full potential. But that doesn’t mean everyone has to bow down to him. In fact, going by his daydreams and personal arc–this would significantly negate a good amount of his character development. 

Venezuela and the cash problem

Alright, as promised, I’m going to talk about the current cash problem.

As you may or may not know, Venezuela currently has one of the worst inflation rates in the world, right now at 536% from January till today, in other words, over 50% MONTHLY inflation, which effectively means one’s salary loses half of its value by the end of the month. 

So, disregarding the terrible burden this creates on society, as otherwise it would only make this post more depressing and long that its about to become, a growing problem is just how much cash you need to pay for stuff, like, for example, a carton of 24 eggs is right now 28,000 BsF, which makes each individual egg ~1,200 BsF, or 12 bills of 100 BsF, currently the most common bill on the street

So, this means you would need 280 bills to pay for a single carton of eggs.

Which, as you can imagine, has created a problem in which there isn’t enough bills around to meet demand, in other words, there’s more (inflated) value on the streets that there are bills available.

And this is assuming you get to use this one, as the second most common bill is the 50 BsF one, meaning you need twice as many to buy said eggs.

There are other, even minor bills of course, but they hold so little value, and are such a bitch to transport, count, store and use, that nowadays people refuse to use them, going so far as to tell bank tellers to fuck off when given while they try to withdraw their money (but more on that in a bit)

The two and five bills dying out almost two years ago.

So, the Maduro regime, acknowledging this problem far too late, decided to finally accept the hyperinflation reality, which they had refused for 2 years, and ordered the creation of new bills, effectively adding two 0′s to all existing bills as to tackle the cash scarcity problem, which by the end of last year had become endemic. 

But since this is Venezuela, these bills took way too long to arrive, having been announced around October last year (give or take, but before December), but only starting to show up en masse around a month ago, meaning that in the time it took them to show up, they lost about 10 times their value, reaching a point in which the highest available bill, the 20,000 BsF one, is not enough to buy one fucking carton of eggs.

And let me tell you, finding one of those 20,000 bills is a miracle these days, as currently the most common one is the 500 BsF bill, which, while cutting the bill load 5 times for all transactions, it nevertheless it still creates the problem of carrying around literal bricks of cash to afford even the most basic of things, with the added bonus that you’re now a target for robbers if spotted, something that had stopped happening simply because spending the bullet on a poor soul wasn’t worth it for the robber.

Now, let’s go back to the banks, as you might be wondering why they’re not helping with the cash problem, and its simple really: They don’t have it either, where you either spend 2 hours on a ATM line to withdraw 8,000 BsF, the maximum allowed in most machines (some just give you fucking 600 BsF, and its literally cheaper to wipe your ass with that than to buy toilet paper), where they never, never, give you new bills, or go into the bank, make a +3 hour line, and arrive at the teller telling you you can only withdraw 10,000 BsF as they’re running out of money, and only in 10 BsF bills, which has started quite nasty, yet ultimately peaceful, verbal fights between the bank personnel and the people in the line.

So, you still need the cash, and while you have it in the bank, after calling the mother of the teller things no suitable for even HBO, you know you can’t go back there, so what do you do? Why, you go cash hunting in business with working card terminals! (good God that’s another problem, but let’s leave it for another day) Where, if you manage to find one with available cash, all you gotta do is give them a commission of up 20% of the value you need for the transaction, which is extremely illegal mind you, but at least you can get all the cash you want, for as long as they have it.

And this is so common, there’s this weird occurrence going on where cash is far more valuable than, well, its face value, so much so you get preference in all business if you announce you intend to buy in cash rather than card (when the option is available that is, good God you guys have no idea how bad the terminal problem is), and can even get a discount, an extreme rarity in these hyperinflated days.

Oh, and since people are assholes regardless of country, some have begun to hoard cash just to sell it at atrocious commission rates (I’ve heard of 40% for wads of 20,000 bills), which is only making the problem, constantly increasing thank to the hyperinflation, worse.

Heh, the problem is so chronic, some people are now using green, free and american fucking dollars, for everyday big transactions, to the point used cars, houses, land, industrial tools and even some car spares now only sell in dollars, something made illegal by the old Chavez regime some 20 years ago, but that people no longer give a fuck about, as even high-ranking government officials are doing the same.

So, there you have it, this is how all of us deal with cash nowadays: As a precios commodity only to be used in the most extreme of circumstances, like bus fares or police bribing, basically the things that won’t take card nor online bank transfers.   

Is Trump Unraveling?

Last week, Senator Bob Corker, the Republican chairman of the Senate Foreign Relations Committee, charged in an interview with the New York Times that Trump was treating his office like “a reality show,” with reckless threats toward other countries that could set the nation “on the path to World War III.”

Corker said he was concerned about Trump. “He would have to concern anyone who cares about our nation,” Corker said, adding that “the vast majority of our caucus understands what we’re dealing with here … the volatility that we’re dealing with and the tremendous amount of work that it takes by people around him to keep him in the middle of the road.”

Corker’s interview was followed by a report from Gabriel Sherman of Vanity Fair, who wrote that the situation has gotten so out of control that Trump’s chief of staff, John Kelly, and Secretary of Defense Jim Mattis have discussed ways to stop Trump should he order a nuclear attack. Kelly has tried to keep Trump focused by intercepting outside phone calls to the White House and restricting access to the Oval Office. Many of Trump’s advisors believe he is “unstable” and “unravelling” quickly. 

Is Trump really unraveling? Are Republican leaders ready to pull the plug? I phoned an old friend, a Republican former member of Congress who keeps up with what’s going on. I scribbled notes as he talked:

Me: So what’s up? Is Corker alone, or are others also ready to call it quits with Trump? 

He: All I know is they’re simmering over there. 

Me: Flake and McCain have come pretty close. 

He: Yeah. Others are thinking about doing what Bob did. Sounding the alarm. They think Trump’s nuts. Unfit. Dangerous. 

Me: Well, they already knew that, didn’t they? 

He: But now it’s personal. It started with the Sessions stuff. Jeff was as loyal as they come. Trump’s crapping on him was like kicking your puppy. And then, you know, him beating up on Mitch for the Obamacare fiasco. And going after Flake and the others. 

Me: So they’re pissed off?

He: Not just that. I mean, they have thick hides. The personal stuff got them to notice all the other things. The wild stuff, like those threats to North Korea. Tillerson would leave tomorrow if he wasn’t so worried Trump would go nuclear, literally. 

Me: You think Trump is really thinking nuclear war?

He: Who knows what’s in his head? But I can tell you this. He’s not listening to anyone. Not a soul. He’s got the nuclear codes and, well, it scares the hell out of me. It’s starting to scare all of them. That’s really why Bob spoke up. 

Me: So what could they do? I mean, even if the whole Republican leadership was willing to say publicly he’s unfit to serve, what then?

He: Bingo! The emperor has no clothes. It’s a signal to everyone they can bail. Have to bail to save their skins. I mean, Trump could be the end of the whole goddam Republican party. 

Me: If he starts a nuclear war, that could be the end of everything. 

He: Yeah, right. So when they start bailing on him, the stage is set. 

Me: For what?

He: Impeachment. 25th amendment.

Me: You think Republicans would go that far? 

He: Not yet. Here’s the thing. They really want to get this tax bill through. That’s all they have going for them. They don’t want to face voters in ’18 or ’20 without something to show for it. They’re just praying Trump doesn’t do something really, really stupid before the tax bill.

Me: Like a nuclear war?

He: Look, all I can tell you is many of the people I talk with are getting freaked out. It’s not as if there’s any careful strategizing going on. Not like, well, do we balance the tax bill against nuclear war? No, no. They’re worried as hell. They’re also worried about Trump crazies, all the ignoramuses he’s stirred up. I mean, Roy Moore? How many more of them do you need to destroy the party? 

Me: So what’s gonna happen?

He: You got me. I’m just glad I’m not there anymore. Trump’s not just a moron. He’s a despicable human being. And he’s getting crazier. Paranoid. Unhinged. Everyone knows it. I mean, we’re in shit up to our eyeballs with this guy.

Lights, camera, action!

KJ Apa x reader

Summary; You’re an actress on Riverdale and when doing a sex scene, things take an interesting turn

Warnings; kinda public, choking, so much daddy because KJ is daddy

A/N; huge thanks to @hesvoidspidey for the inspiration for this and letting me base this on one of her amazing imagines!

Laughing at KJ goofing around before his scene, you sat behind the camera with the crew. You watched him play with his guitar and then he stuck his tongue out and flicked it really fast. You couldn’t help to think how it would between you legs and you had to press your thighs together to suppress your sudden urge.

You had been on the show from the start and you were great friends with all of the cast but you had a thing for KJ. No one of course knew about it and you planned to keep it that way. But when the director had called you to a quick meeting a few weeks back to tell you that you were doing a sex scene with KJ’s character, you had felt really nervous. You had done sex scenes before but now that it was with someone you liked, the pressure was on. You didn’t wanna make a fool out of yourself in front of him or to even hint about your feelings towards him.

“Hey bae, wanna go to lunch with your daddy?”, you felt KJ’s arms around you and wondered how long you had been lost in your thoughts if he was already done with his scene.

Him calling you ‘bae’ was a regular thing, it had started when you first hated the word and KJ kept calling you that to annoy you but when you found out what it actually meant, it wasn’t that bad anymore and KJ just kept the name, and now, it made your heart flutter. The daddy thing was something everyone knew, not just the cast. There had actually been a poll about who of the cast was most daddy and KJ insisted that he was always your daddy and that made your panties wanna remove themselves.

Walking to the cafeteria area on set, you felt a little blush creeping on your cheeks when KJ hung his hand over your shoulders. To anyone else, this was normal KJ and it used to be to you too but now that you had recently started to feel something towards the kiwi cutie, you tried to contain the butterflies in your stomach.

Sitting at a table with Cole and Madelaine, they greeted you with smiles as you sat down with KJ on your side.

You mostly ignored your friends as you tried to focus on the scene you would soon be doing. You heard you name being said and paid attention to the conversation.

“So Y/N, KJ, how do you feel about the big scene?”, Madelaine questioned with excitement.

“Yeah, KJ, how do you feel? That must be the most action you’ve gotten in months”, Cole laughed as you and Madelaine joined him but KJ just rolled his eyes.

“Shut up Cole, I’m actually looking forward to it, it’s gonna be a big shocker on the show”, KJ revealed.

His words made you even more nervous than before because you knew that the scene was absolutely gonna be a shock to everyone as it had been to you so you knew you needed to nail it.

“What about you, Y/N?”, Madelaine asked with a smile.

“Oh, actually I’m a bit nervous”, you admitted, finding your salad really interesting as you looked down.

“Relax, you’re gonna do great”, KJ told you, placing his hand over yours on the table. You simply smiled at him, your heart beating faster.

“Daddy’s gonna take real good care of you”, he joked and everyone laughed, including you.

Reading the script over and over again for your sex scene, you dreaded for the moment when someone would enter your trailer to get you to set.

The scene was simple, not many lines. It would happen in your characters big fancy bedroom and it would start with your and KJ’s characters having a fight, which had already been filmed, and then KJ would just press you against a wall and kiss you out of the blue. You would then proceed to remove each other’s shirts as KJ was making you walk backwards to your king sized bed and push you to lay down on it, removing your pants. He then would get on top of you and start kissing your neck, lowering to your bra covered breasts and then pulling the blanket over you as he disappeared under it. The scene would end with the camera filming your moaning face. Couldn’t be that hard, right?

You tried to picture the scene in your head with your eyes closed, but also trying to find ways to block your mind from forming any dirty thoughts about it.

“Y/N, they’re ready for you on set!”, a woman’s voice interrupted your thinking and you stood up, mentally preparing yourself.

The set looked amazing. ‘Your room’ was lit dimly and there were a few candles here and there. The giant bed was covered with silky red sheets, making the mood a little sexy.

“You wet for daddy already?”, KJ whispered in your ear out of nowhere as you were studying the set. You jumped a little but felt more aroused than scared.

“I’m joking, Y/N, just messing with ya”, he laughed at your slightly red face as you didn’t find an answer. He was always teasing and playing with you but not like this but you just brushed it off as you were called to take your places.

Standing with your back close to the wall, you faked a pissed off look on your face when the director called 'action!’.

“I’m so done with your crap, Archie!”, you yelled at KJ.

“Well that’s too bad because I’m not giving up on you!”, he yelled back before the both of you stayed silent for a moment. You could’ve sworn you saw for less than a millisecond a smirk tugging at his lips but thought that you had just imagined it.

He then took one big step towards you, grabbed you by the side of your neck and waist and pushed you against the wall as he smashed his lips against yours. The kiss made you forget that you were acting as KJ’s lips felt so good against yours and you brought your hands to his hair. He then pulled you from to wall and turned you around as he broke the kiss to remove your top, revealing your scarlet red lace bra. KJ sneaked a quick look at your boobs as he kept pushing you back by your waist and hurriedly removed his own shirt. You felt your legs hit the edge of the bed and you were about to lay back on it as the script had said but KJ clearly improvised as he lifted you and softly threw you on it and pulled your pants off.

You were a little surprised by this but kept on going as no had said 'cut’.

Resting you head on the small tower of pillows, you watched KJ coming to hover over you as you smirked seductively at him.

“I’m gonna show you just how much you really need me”, he said his line and then proceeded to kiss your neck, slowly getting lower to kiss the skin over your collarbones and finally your almost exposed boobs. You were breathing heavily when he grabbed your ribs, making your boobs press together and making the bra rise just a little but you thought it wouldn’t be enough to reveal anything to the camera. He stayed kissing your tits a little longer than you thought and then you felt his tongue slightly brush your right nipple. You almost broke character from the contact and you didn’t know if KJ even knew what he did as he withdrew himself from your chest to pull the blanket over your legs and stomach.

You felt yourself getting wet from the small touch but tried your best to keep your poker face on as KJ disappeared under the blanket and you felt him laying down on his stomach between you legs.

Now this was the hard part. You had to fake moan and look like he was giving you oral. Sure you had faked orgasms before but this wasn’t the same.

You lifted your legs so that your knees were making the blanket rise, giving KJ more space to do what he was 'doing’. You closed your eyes and were about to start moaning as you felt fingers pushing your panties to the side.

This was definitely not scripted. You gripped the sheets as you didn’t know what to do. You could’ve stopped the scene but you didn’t wanna have to explain why and it had went well so far so you decided to just go with it, I mean, having KJ between your legs wasn’t bad.

You started to moan silently and then you felt a finger entering you pussy, the wetness making it slide in easily. You let out a loud moan that wasn’t planned but a second finger entered and you didn’t have to fake your moaning anymore. You didn’t know why KJ was doing it but you knew you would look great on camera and you felt so good. He fingered you for a few seconds and then you felt his tongue flicking your clit and another unplanned moan came out.

You were wondering why the director hadn’t cut the scene as it wasn’t supposed to last longer than a few seconds after KJ went under the blanket but you weren’t complaining.

Not even a minute had passed when you felt KJ curl his fingers against your g-spot and you almost instantly came but that’s when the director yelled 'cut!’. You felt more than disappointed when KJ pulled his fingers out of you and your panties were back over your drenched pussy.

“That was great Y/N, absolutely fantastic!”, the director praised you as you put your clothes back on and tried to hide your blush when the crew gave you an applause.

Usually you stayed for awhile to watch the footage but now you were sexually frustrated and needed a release so you started to head to your trailer but KJ stopped you.

“Can I show you something?”, he asked with a smile.

“Y-yeah, sure”, you smiled back, wanting to ask him about his little tease and started to follow him.

KJ led you to his trailer and opened the door for you as you walked up the few stairs. Once you were inside, you turned around to face him and it was like the scene you just did had replayed when KJ grabbed your waist and pushed you against the wall to kiss you hard. You instantly kissed him back and after a moment he pulled back to smile at you.

“You were wet for daddy”, he said as his smile turned into a smirk.

You just rolled your eyes playfully as you pulled you top over your head and went to do the same to his shirt. You quickly snapped your bra off too.

A small scream escaped your throat when KJ lifted you from the floor and carried you to place you on the couch. He was kissing you in a second and started to undo his pants but you stopped him and pushed him off of you to make him stand up. He looked at you with a slightly disappointed and confused look but you just smirked as you pulled his pants off, along with his boxers, his big cock bouncing up.

You didn’t give him any time to react as you took his hard cock in your mouth until you almost gagged. KJ started to grunt and gripped your hair tightly.

“Oh shit, Y/N, you’re a fucking goddess”, he told you as you kept sucking his dick.

“You look so good sucking daddy’s cock”, he smirked down at you and you lost it.

You stood up from the sofa, removed your pants and pushed him to sit down and in a second, you were on top of him with your legs on his sides, lowering yourself onto his length. You both moaned in pleasure when he filled you up. Starting to bounce up and down, he gripped your waist.

“You feel so good, daddy”, you moaned.

“I love it when you call me that”, he said and you smirked a little.

You fucked him for a good few minutes but he suddenly lifted you from him, making you both stand up and then he pushed you face first onto the couch so that your knees were on the sitting part and you leaned your elbows on the couchs back. KJ wasted no time in pushing back in you and started to pound into you without mercy. He snaked his hand around your throat and pulled your back against his chest and squeezed your throat.

“Who am I?”, he growled into your ear.

“Daddy”, you tried to say, his hand making it a little hard.

“Louder”, he demanded as he went to pinch your nipple with his free hand.

“Daddy!!”, you screamed and came a couple seconds before he did.

You both fell onto the couch but didn’t have any time to relax as there was a knock on the door. KJ immediately jumped up and grabbed a towel from a chair near by and wrapped it around his waist and then picked up his t-shirt from the floor and threw it to you. He made sure that you were covered before opening his mouth.

“It’s open!”, he yelled and stood close to you as you sat on the couch.

Cole walked in and you felt your cheeks getting hot. It was pretty obvious that what you had been doing due to you wearing only a shirt but hoped he would be maybe tired or something to not notice. He didn’t say anything at first as he studied your and KJ’s choice of clothing and then started to smirk. Busted, you thought.

“Daddy’s needed on set”, he smirked widely and left as your face fell.

“Fuck!”, you huffed out as KJ sat next to you and started to laugh.

“What’s so funny?”, you asked with a raised brow.

“Nothing, I’m just happy”, he said, turning to smile at you.

“Really? I mean, me too but I didn’t know you wanted this too”, you told him.

“I’ve wanted this from the first time you called me daddy”, he confessed and chuckled.

“Can we talk about this after we finish work? I need to go do a scene but you’re welcome to join me”, he said and you nodded, getting up and dressing to return to set.

Walking to the Pop’s diner set with KJ, you spotted Lili, Camila, Madelaine and Cole standing by the coffee table. They all said their hellos to you and you felt Cole smirking at you.

“How did your scene go?”, Lili asked.

“Great”, both you and KJ said at the same time.

“I think it went more than just great”, Cole commented and you felt a little panicked.

“What do you mean?”, Camila questioned.

“Let’s just say that Y/N just proved that KJ’s the real daddy of this group”, Cole smirked as the girls just looked confused. You looked at KJ and he smirked at you and Lili noticed it.

“Oh my god! You didn’t!?”, she yelled as they all realized what Cole’s words meant.

“Oh, they definitely did!”, Cole laughed.

“Guess the secret is out”, you awkwardly laughed at KJ.

“I don’t mind”, he said and kissed you as the girls cheered.

Send a number to answer a question! > v <

1: when you have cereal, do you have more milk than cereal or more cereal than milk?

2: do you like the feeling of cold air on your cheeks on a wintery day?

3: what random objects do you use to bookmark your books?

4: how do you take your coffee/tea?

5: are you self-conscious of your smile?

6: do you keep plants?

7: do you name your plants?

8: what artistic medium do you use to express your feelings?

9: do you like singing/humming to yourself?

10: do you sleep on your back, side, or stomach?

11: what’s an inner joke you have with your friends?

12: what’s your favorite planet?

13: what’s something that made you smile today?

14: if you were to live with your best friend in an old flat in a big city, what would it look like?

15: go google a weird space fact and tell us what it is!

16: what’s your favorite pasta dish?

17: what color do you really want to dye your hair?

18: tell us about something dumb/funny you did that has since gone down in history between you and your friends and is always brought up.

19: do you keep a journal? what do you write/draw/ in it?

20: what’s your favorite eye color?

21: talk about your favorite bag, the one that’s been to hell and back with you and that you love to pieces.

22: are you a morning person?

23: what’s your favorite thing to do on lazy days where you have 0 obligations?

24: is there someone out there you would trust with every single one of your secrets?

25: what’s the weirdest place you’ve ever broken into?

26: what are the shoes you’ve had for forever and wear with every single outfit?

27: what’s your favorite bubblegum flavor?

28: sunrise or sunset?

29: what’s something really cute that one of your friends does and is totally endearing?

30: think of it: have you ever been truly scared?

31: what is your opinion of socks? do you like wearing weird socks? do you sleep with socks? do you confine yourself to white sock hell? really, just talk about socks.

32: tell us a story of something that happened to you after 3AM when you were with friends.

33: what’s your fave pastry?

34: tell us about the stuffed animal you kept as a kid. what is it called? what does it look like? do you still keep it?

35: do you like stationary and pretty pens and so on? do you use them often?

36: which band’s sound would fit your mood right now?

37: do you like keeping your room messy or clean?

38: tell us about your pet peeves!

39: what color do you wear the most?

40: think of a piece of jewelry you own: what’s it’s story? does it have any meaning to you?

41: what’s the last book you remember really, really loving?

42: do you have a favorite coffee shop? describe it!

43: who was the last person you gazed at the stars with?

44: when was the last time you remember feeling completely serene and at peace with everything?

45: do you trust your instincts a lot?

46: tell us the worst pun you can think of.

47: what food do you think should be banned from the universe?

48: what was your biggest fear as a kid? is it the same today?

49: do you like buying CDs and records? what was the last one you bought?

50: what’s an odd thing you collect?

51: think of a person. what song do you associate with them?

52: what are your favorite memes of the year so far?

53: have you ever watched the rocky horror picture show? heathers? beetlejuice? pulp fiction? what do you think of them?

54: who’s the last person you saw with a true look of sadness on their face?

55: what’s the most dramatic thing you’ve ever done to prove a point?

56: what are some things you find endearing in people?

57: go listen to bohemian rhapsody. how did it make you feel? did you dramatically reenact the lyrics?

58: who’s the wine mom and who’s the vodka aunt in your group of friends? why?

59: what’s your favorite myth?

60: do you like poetry? what are some of your faves?

61: what’s the stupidest gift you’ve ever given? the stupidest one you’ve ever received?

62: do you drink juice in the morning? which kind?

63: are you fussy about your books and music? do you keep them meticulously organized or kinda leave them be?

64: what color is the sky where you are right now?

65: is there anyone you haven’t seen in a long time who you’d love to hang out with?

66: what would your ideal flower crown look like?

67: how do gloomy days where the sky is dark and the world is misty make you feel?

68: what’s winter like where you live?

69: what are your favorite board games?

70: have you ever used a ouija board?

71: what’s your favorite kind of tea?

72: are you a person who needs to note everything down or else you’ll forget it?

73: what are some of your worst habits?

74: describe a good friend of yours without using their name or gendered pronouns.

75: tell us about your pets!

76: is there anything you should be doing right now but aren’t?

77: pink or yellow lemonade?

78: are you in the minion hateclub or fanclub?

79: what’s one of the cutest things someone has ever done for you?

80: what color are your bedroom walls? did you choose that color? if so, why?

81: describe one of your friend’s eyes using the most abstract imagery you can think of.

82: are/were you good in school?

83: what’s some of your favorite album art?

84: are you planning on getting tattoos? which ones?

85: do you read comics? what are your faves?

86: do you like concept albums? which ones?

87: what are some movies you think everyone should watch at least once in their lives?

88: are there any artistic movements you particularly enjoy?

89: are you close to your parents?

90: talk about your one of you favorite cities.

91: where do you plan on traveling this year?

92: are you a person who drowns their pasta in cheese or a person who barely sprinkles a pinch?

93: what’s the hairstyle you wear the most?

94: who was the last person you know to have a birthday?

95: what are your plans for this weekend?

96: do you install your computer updates really quickly or do you procrastinate on them a lot?

97: myer briggs type, zodiac sign, and hogwarts house?

98: when’s the last time you went hiking? did you enjoy it?

99: list some songs that resonate to your soul whenever you hear them.

The Problem [m]

Genre : smut
summary : Listen, you really hadn’t meant to think of your friend whilst you got off, but it happened.

“Just tell me. I promise I won’t tell anyone else - it’s not me is it?”


You said it far too quick. Damn.

 You could feel him moving closer. “Oh … that’s a twist.”

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BTS One-Shot: Pretend

Warning: angst and smut to follow.

Pairing: Yoongi/reader

Below is the one-shot I wrote for my 2,500 follower giveaway as requested by the winner @silvilika. This is an extension of the reaction I wrote for ‘BTS members getting jealous when their ex gets close with another member’, which Silvilika requested Yoongi for :) Thank you for your prompt hun; it hurt me to write, but it was a good kind of hurt ♡♡  


Hoseok prods the sullen looking boy sat at his side, concern pulling his eyebrows down into a frown as he takes note of the way his friend is sat there with his arms folded, chewing his thumbnail and being generally unresponsive.  

“Hyung,” he tries again, knocking their shoulders.  Yoongi hasn’t seemed right ever since they got back to the dorms, and if what his eyes are fixed on is anything to go by, Hobi has a pretty good idea as to what might be bothering him.

“Hm?”  Yoongi finally responds, though it’s only half-heartedly.  

“You alright?”  He just sort of grunts around the nail he’s chewing, not even glancing in Hobi’s general direction, and the younger boy follows his hyung’s eyeline right over to where you’re sat next to Namjoon just a sofa length away.  The two of you had already been there when Hobi and Yoongi had gotten back from lunch, and the moment he’d seen you Hobi had noticed the way Yoongi’s eyed had darkened, his mood dropping through the floor.  

You’ve been broken up a good few months now, and though it was a fairly amicable parting there’s still been a fair share of awkward moments whenever the two of you have had to share a room - this being one of them.   You and Namjoon have been working on lyrics together for hours, though the time has seemed to fly by.  His English may be near perfect but it’s still not his first language, and you revel in being able to lend him a helping hand wherever possible.  It’s for the group’s benefit, really, though Yoongi doesn’t seem to be appreciating that.  

He doesn’t appreciate how close you and Namjoon have been getting lately, either.  Ever since they’ve been writing the new album you seem to be around all the time, and where once you would’ve been helping him with his English translations you’re now dripping off Namjoon’s arm instead, sitting too close and smiling too much.  He can’t stand it.  

“I thought it was you that dumped her?”  Hobi murmurs under his breath so only Yoongi can hear, and that seems to do a better job of catching his attention.  The elder boy lets his thumb drop from his mouth, turning to face his friend with a look that’s far too impassive to be genuine.  Hobi knows him too well to believe that this isn’t affecting him.  

“I did,” he answers shortly, his eyes drifting back over in your direction when he hears you laugh loudly.  You’re leaning your head on his shoulder and smiling into it as you hold onto his arm, the whole of your left side sitting snugly against Namjoon’s right, and the worst of it is is that his leader is just lapping it up, gazing down at you with far too much affection for your ex-boyfriend’s liking.

Yoongi turns back to Hoseok, and this time he can’t hide the slight grimace that’s curling the corner of his lip.  

“I just didn’t think she’d keep… hanging around.”  It’s not like he broke up with you because either of you did anything awful or argued too much or for too long.  It’s not like he stopped liking you or caring about you either - on the contrary - it was because his feelings were getting too strong that he decided to put an end to it when he did, knowing it’d be too hard to sustain them whilst he was away on tour or working the ridiculous hours that he does.  

You’d said you’d understood; hell, you’d even agreed that a relationship was impossible with things as they are, but now Yoongi’s wondering if you’d just been telling him what he’d been wanting to hear at the time.  It’s either that or you’re just a glutton for punishment, because to him it looks as though you’re very near to embarking on a relationship with someone else that’s just as unsustainable as yours had been.  

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