why do you do this to me dashboard

A Study in Feline Mating Behaviours: by one Gavin Free, PhD.

pairing: michael/gavin
warnings: none
rating: teen
length: 2,156 words

ao3 link: http://archiveofourown.org/works/7456282

summary: “So, I think Michael wants to eat me.”
Geoff takes one look at him and starts laughing so hard he has to pull over to the side of the road.

(or, Michael’s been acting weird and Gavin has a theory: too bad it couldn’t be farther from the truth.)

additional tags: hybrid au, fluff

“So, I think Michael wants to eat me.”

Geoff takes one look at him and starts laughing so hard he has to pull over to the side of the road. Not a giggle, or the huff of a laugh that Geoff usually gives to anything he finds somewhat funny but isn’t worth wasting energy on; this is full-blown, voice-cracking, wheezing, huffing Geoff laughter, and he’s pretty sure that if the steering wheel hadn’t been in the way, Geoff would be folded double. It’s been a long day at the Achievement Hunter office and Gavin’s just ticked off enough that his feathers ruffle and his shoulders hunch as he turns away from Geoff. “Oy, shut up. I’m being serious.”

“Why would you even say that, oh my god!” Geoff’s gasping for air and Gavin can see tears in his eyes as he absolutely howls with laughter. He pushes at the older man’s horns in protest, which sobers him up, although Geoff is still wiping his eyes as he gets back onto the road. “Why do you think that?” He’s still chuckling, but Gavin ignores him, staring at the dashboard. “I mean, I know what cats are like. I’ve owned a cat forever! And he’s acting more and more like Smee just before he drags in a dead rat or something.”

“Who, Michael?”

“Yeah! Just watch him around me! It’s bloody terrifying, it is. He’s always doing this thing where he’s like, staring at me really intensely. It’s just like Smee hunting birds in the backyard!”

Now Geoff’s just casting him sidelong looks of pity. “What?”

“Nothing, dude. I’ll take your word for it.”


For once, Gavin’s not taking the piss. Sure, they joke around the office about the odd mixture of prey and predator that is Achievement Hunter and there are obviously laws and such against eating anyone else; they may be hybrids but they’re not savages, for god’s sake. Nobody’s really going to eat anyone else, probably, but he can’t help but worry. It’s just-

Michael looks at him differently. He remembers the way Michael looked at him when they first met, the combination of surprise and suspicion and ambivalence, quickly replaced by annoyance and frustration. That was alright, Gavin was used to those, seeing as he usually provoked it anyway. But now, there’s something else behind the fond exasperation in his eyes, a strange intense look, as if he was the only person in the whole world to Michael, as if he was, well, prey. And he’ll admit, it ruffles his feathers quite a bit, especially seeing as he actually is prey; all things considered, a lark isn’t high up on the food chain. It’s odd, stirs up a primal fear inside him that he can ignore but not quite forget.

The next day, Michael’s back at it again. He’s talking to Jack, back faced to the door, but the moment Gavin walks in, he looks up and stares straight into his eyes, tail whipping straight down. Gavin swallows down the irrational spike of fear and grins at him, and it seems to snap Michael back into reality. He grins back, a cheeky smirk that makes his down feathers fluff, but even though Michael goes right back to talking to Jack, his posture is different now, back straight and tail stiff, and his ears, originally relaxed, are upright and twitching slightly. Jack gives him a once-over and glances over to meet Gavin’s worried eyes, understanding dawning in his eyes. He murmurs something to Michael, who mutters right back an audible, “Fuck off.” Jack replies, and Michael practically hisses at him, storming back to his seat and dropping into it so forcefully that it creaks. Gavin exchanges wide-eyed looks with Ray, and pats Michael on the arm. He regrets it immediately, because Michael draws back like he’s been stung, hackles raising quickly. The tension in the office doesn’t dissipate for the rest of the morning.

So Gavin corners Jack outside his office, because Jack is a lion and Gavin really wants to know what he said to Michael, and it makes total sense up to the point where Jack says no. They sort of look at each other for a while, Jack calm and Gavin confused.

“But, Jack!”


“Jack! This is important!”

“It’s also none of my business.”

“Well, I should think it’s my bloody business if my best friend wants to maul my face off, yeah?”

The confusion on Jack’s face would’ve been comical if it hadn’t been so relatable. They stare at each other for a beat, and Jack blinks. “Is that what you think’s going on here?”

“Well, yeah. Isn’t it?”

Jack just pushes past him and walks to his car, leaving Gavin confused and frustrated and trilling loud, angry noises at him. It’s unfortunately nothing new for either of them.


He asks Ryan next, just because Ryan is actually a nice person and the real dad of the group under all of his insanity and malice. He explains the whole situation to him over lunch another day, and because Ryan is nicer than the other gents, he listens to all of it before humming thoughtfully and then shaking his head.


“Nah, I don’t think that’s it.”

“Why not? It’s pretty simple, innit?”

“Maybe you’re barking up the wrong tree?” Ryan snickers and flicks at one of his wings, stretched out because he can never do it in the office, tiny and cramped as it is, and a 9-5 without stretching his wings is hell on his back. Gavin scowls and flaps it at him, sending a gust of wind through the break room. It’s annoying, sure, but it doesn’t account for the sudden blankness of Ryan’s expression. It’s then that he realises Michael’s entered the room, and without consciously deciding to, his wings snap back, folding up neatly against his spine. Michael looks terrifying, sharp teeth just resting against his bottom lip, ears perked and tail lowered and stiff. His hackles are raised, and it takes a moment for Gavin to realise that the low sound he’s barely hearing is Michael growling quietly. He shrinks back, glancing over at Ryan for support, but the bovine hybrid is standing up, the same irritatingly understanding look that Jack had now plastered across his face. Calmly, Ryan nods to Michael and disposes of his trash before leaving the breakroom. Gavin immediately reconsiders his assumption that Ryan is a nice person. No nice person leaves their friend to a predator to possibly have their face mauled off.

Somehow, though, the moment Ryan leaves the room, the growling tapers off and Michael shakes himself, claws that Gavin is acutely aware of retracting back into his fingers, to his immense relief. He’s still got the intense look in his eyes and his tail remains lowered, but the tension in his shoulders dissipates and he fetches a drink from the fridge before glancing over to him, smile wide, as if the events of two minutes ago hadn’t happened.

“Wanna go to Rudy’s?”

Gavin’s never been more reluctant, but he nods anyway. At least it’s crowded there. If anything happens, they’ll know exactly what.


It escalates after that. He calls Michael all manner of insults, but instead of the usual eye roll or “Shut the fuck up, Gav,”, the Jersey boy just cuffs him about the head or bats his shoulder. It’s never too rough, nothing he’s never learned to take in 26 years of being part bird, but it’s still unnerving, the sudden clap of his hand, and Gavin jumps a foot in the air every time it happens. Michael finds it hilarious, but Gavin just finds it sad. He gets an achievement in a game by backstabbing Michael, and the cat hybrid tackles him out of his chair and wrestles him around into a headlock that he won’t relinquish, even though Gavin’s smacking him with his wings and squawking loudly. It’s nice to tumble with his boy again, but the fear at the back of his mind screws with him, and when Michael lets him go, he scrambles quickly back into his chair, ignoring the surprised and somewhat hurt look in his boy’s eyes.

And so maybe Gavin is sort of, kinda, slightly, somewhat avoiding him. In his defence, he really doesn’t want to be eaten, which he sees as a perfectly justified goal, which is why it’s so unfair whenever he successfully evades going to lunch or bevs or downtown with Michael and the gents give him a disappointed look, as if he’s the one in the wrong. He’s not the one trying to eat his friends, for god’s sake. Michael probably doesn’t notice anyway, the first few times Gavin said no, he’d just shrugged and gone with Lindsay or one of the other guys, and then after that he’d stopped asking altogether. Fortunately, they haven’t had any Play Pals coming up, and in normal Let’s Plays the others keep up the banter for him. He never stays in the office longer than the normal hours because Michael always stays late, and he’s almost perfected the art of not quite looking at Michael when they talk. Gavin misses their usual conversation, but he thinks he’d prefer to be alive and without a best friend, rather than having said best friend kill you. Does that even make sense? Probably.


The whole thing comes to a head a couple of weeks later, in possibly the worst way. It’s five in the evening and Gavin’s puttering about in the break room, about to leave the building, when a hand grabs him by the elbow and he’s pulled back to meet a somewhat upset Michael.

“You’ve been avoiding me.”

“What?” His eyes meet Michael’s and slide away quickly, and he nervously bites his lip, feathers circling him defensively, and he can almost feel the confusion and hurt radiating from the cat hybrid. His tail curls around him and his ears flatten against his head, and Gavin can’t help but feel like shit now.

“What did I do? Are you okay?” He shakes his head, refusing to reply, but Michael steps closer, hands moving to grab his shoulders, stopping in their tracks as Gavin flinches and his wings shove them away. “Don’t! I-”

“What? What’s going on?”

“Don’t- You can’t- You can’t eat me, alright?”

There’s a beat of incredulous silence, and Gavin thinks that maybe Geoff and Jack and Ryan had a point when he meets Michael’s eyes and they’re full of shock. “Is that what you think’s going on?”

“Uh- I mean, it seemed like it.” He mumbles, and Michael shakes his head. “You’re such a fucking dumbass.”

“Well, then what is going on? You’ve been acting really weird, you can’t deny that!”

He barely has time to register what’s happening before Michael’s grabbing him by the collar and jerking him forward. Their lips meet in a chaste kiss that’s over almost as soon as it starts, and Michael steps back immediately, a flush creeping down his neck. “That’s what’s going on, fucker.” He mumbles, but there’s no heat behind the words and Gavin can see the fear in his eyes as his ears flatten against his head. Almost without thinking, he pulls him back in, hand wrapping around the back of his neck, and kisses him properly. In terms of a kiss, it’s not great, desperation making it sloppy and fumbling, but then Michael presses him against the wall and he feels a sharp canine nick his lower lip, and bloody hell forget what he just said, this is spectacular.

When they finally break apart, they’re both panting, grinning like idiots, and Michael presses his forehead to Gavin’s, shuts his eyes. “Come home with me.” His tail wraps around Gavin’s wrist affectionately, and Gavin’s wings unfold, enclose him as well.

And maybe he should stop to think about this, it’s not like he’s ever been with a guy, and it should probably be a lot more scary than it is, but then again it’s Michael, and nothing is too difficult with him, so he mumbles mindlessly, “Yeah. Yeah, okay.”

The delighted grin he receives in return is more than enough to chase away any lingering doubt, and he follows willingly when Michael steps away, taking him by the hand and leading him out of the break room and towards the main office door.


The next day, they practically sprint into the office, fifteen minutes late and panting, and Michael manages to get out between heavy breaths, “Sorry I’m late. I was doing…things.”

“I’m things.” Gavin chirps from behind him, and although everyone in the room groans and Ray shouts, “I’m out!”, it’s definitely worth it to see the pretty flush creep up Michael’s neck.

“Still think Michael’s out to eat you?” Geoff calls out, and the gents all look up at him with the same annoying I-told-you-so look.

“Turns out, Geoffrey, I was completely right about that.”

Hurt// Zach Dempsey

Requested by: @xwannabequeenx

I’m so sorry its so late I was sick but I hope you like it.

Y/N please stop ignoring me

I saw Zach send what seemed to be the 50th text. I watched as he started calling I stared down at my phone before shutting it off.

“Wow what did he do?” Bryce smirked.

“Nothing just drive.” I stared ahead at the dashboard in anger. It all started this morning.

Keep reading

Would Never Call It Love 5 | Calum Hood

It’s finally here! Again I’m writing this off of the top of my head, so this could or could not be the last part of the story. I’m so happy all of you still love this story and continue to tell me your reactions which bring me genuine happiness. So thank you. Enjoy.

1 2 3 4

(not my gif)


After days of sitting in bed with Ashton at our current venue, I decided getting up and at least showering would help wash my sorrows away. Ashton carefully helped my weak physique off the indented bed, his arm on my waist for balance, and sat me on the toilet and turned on the shower head. 

“Just wait until it warms up. I’ll set up your clothes in here as well, and we’ll get going after that. We’ll get some breakfast yeah? Any place you like.” And he grabbed the back of my head bringing it to his lips for a subtle kiss of comfort, and left. I sighed and shredded off my 5 day old sweatshirt and my stretched out black leggings, and felt the water temperature. It was perfectly warm.

I stepped in and immediately it hit my skin with a sizzle. I hoisted my hair back as my face was now drenched in water. My hands rested on the back of my neck, my eyes fixated on the shower wall in front of me. It had been a long time since I was left alone, by myself, with my thoughts. I could hear the pounding of my heart get deeper, thinking of Calum and how he was holding up as well. Was he crying? Was he sat in bed every minute he could get because the outside world was too much to bare for him as well? Or was he laughing like he never laughed with me before, was he happier than he ever felt, looking at someone else with a different light and different intention in their eyes than what I had? I hadn’t even realized I was crying at this point. The water being poured out onto me was intertwined with the water pouring out of me, and I couldn’t tell which was which. I could feel the sinking feeling hit me in my gut and chest, making it hard to catch my breathe. My hand shot out in front of me to catch my body from falling and smashing into the beige tiles. A sob escaped my mouth, loud enough to alert Ashton, who was now inside setting up my clothes. The cry lasted a few seconds, and was loud enough to crack glass. Ashton’s heart leaped out of his chest as he pulled back the shower curtain, just in time to catch me as I fell to my knees. The strength in me was gone, my everything was gone.

Ashton got on his knees on the bathroom floor, not even caring that he was getting wet, and just held me close to his chest just like he did the night Calum left. I continued to cry into his black t-shirt, clutching onto it. His hand reached up to my head and brought his mouth to it, he knew it brought a sense of protection to me. “You’re going to be okay, you’re going to be okay. I’m so sorry, I don’t know when but…you won’t have to hurt much longer in my presence.” 

After a few minutes, Ashton turned off the water and inside filled the tub for a bath. He squirted some soap into the water so it bubbled up, and brought the soap up and down my body. In reality, it was just him giving me a bath, but in my mind, he was scrubbing away any last bit of Calum lingering behind. I knew Ashton was waiting to be with me, it was killing him inside to see me worked up over someone who hadn’t been done anything good for me. But he was being patient; any other guy who would’ve been in his shoes would’ve quit by now. I was silently thanking and praying for him not to give up on me.

He brought me to a small brunch place that he claimed had the best breakfast burritos in the area, or so he read online. We sat down inside near the back corner, the furthest away from outside and people as we could. I hadn’t spoken a word since we got out of the hotel, only nodded and hummed as a response. I was just afraid of the crack in my voice from crying and yelling so much that I just decided to keep my mouth shut. Ashton’s hand snaked it’s way to my own from across the table and held my left in his right, slowly rubbing his thumb over my tense knuckles. “Anything you want okay? But I really would recommend the burrito, or you could just half it with me.” I sucked my lips in and only nodded once again, earning a quiet sigh from Ashton’s side of the table.

After ordering 1 breakfast burrito, 2 blueberry waffles, a whole stack of bacon and a plate of hash browns, we began to eat. Ashton completely inhaled his burrito within minutes while I struggled to scarf down the waffles. No doubt everything tasted and smelled delicious, but the continuously growing lump in my throat blocked anything from getting down, even water. Ashton looked up at me as he finished the last chunk of his burrito, cheeks full like a chipmunk and crumbs of egg and tortilla all over his cheeks and lips. For the first time in a while, I let a small chuckle out at this facial expression. He gave me a questionable look, before I leaned over the table and shook my head.

“Hold on lemme clean you up.” I brought my napkin up to his cheeks, softly swiping to remove the mess. He laughed, feeling like he was a little kid again, a sense of home coming back to him after being so far away for so long. I looked into his glossy eyes, a sense of home coming back to me. He was protective, comforting, loving, and warm. His aura provoked those feelings you get inside your own house. Ashton exuded feelings I had been missing for a long time now.

However, our moment was ruined when the bell on top of the restaurant doors opened up causing both of our heads to naturally turn toward the noise. The two lovebirds came walking in, hand in hand with smiles on their faces. The brown-skinned boy’s head settled on us, and his smiling mouth fell onto his girl’s head, planting a small kiss on it. She blushed and began speaking to the waiter that there was 2 of them.

Without hesitation, I hands dropped the spoon and napkin I was holding, causing a loud clinking noise, and I scooted my chair back enough to cause streaks to appear on the floor and stormed out of the restaurant, Ashton following behind me. All Ashton could do was hit Calum on his free shoulder which almost sent him back. Calum’s bottom lip sucked into his mouth letting out a ‘hmph.’ 

I slammed the door to Ashton’s car on the passenger side and just cried into my lap. After hearing the driver’s side door slam, the car’s atmosphere fell to a bitter heaviness. He just listened to me sob, for the second time today, calming down his own breathing. My hands flew to the dashboard ahead of me and I started slamming my hands against it, hitting the middle console and the sides of the door also. Ashton grabbed my wrists in his and yanked me to look at him.

“Stop letting him do this to you!”

“I can’t! I can’t! Why! Why does he get to do this to me!…” He couldn’t answer. He couldn’t tell her that he only wanted her for sex, he couldn’t tell her that he likes Nia genuinely, he couldn’t tell her that he never cared. Of course, that’s what he wanted to say because he honestly believed it was all true, but in Calum’s mind, it was the exact opposite.

Calum’s POV / before they saw Y/N and Ashton…

I laid there in the newly made hotel bed, the sheets stained in newly made tears. I let a few slip out of my eyes, the only thing on my mind being her. Seeing her underneath Ashton in lust, watching her break down in his arms, remembering her walking away from me that night when we realized we were done for. 

I’m Calum Hood for crying out loud. I don’t cry. I rarely show emotion. I’m either stone cold or happy go lucky. There’s no in between. I never cry, I never get heart broken, because I never get attached. I guess that was my mistake this time around. I lied to myself, I lied to her, now I’m lying to Nia.

“Cal! Get dressed, I’m taking you out for breakfast so you’re energized before soundcheck let’s go!” She cheerfully skipped into the room, me wiping my eyes as fast as I can pretending that I was just now waking up. She kissed my cheek before throwing a random graphic tee and black jeans at me and shut the door. I flopped back onto the bed with the tee and jeans over my face, telling myself that today was a new. I was going to get out of bed, spread a fake smile on my face, and conquer the day.

And then I laughed because that surely wasn’t going to happen, and hopped in the shower.


I was now time for the show, and I sat next to Ashton and Michael, who were both brushing their teeth and trying to speak to each other in mumbles. They knew I thought it was comical, so to get me to finally smile, they kept over exaggerating their sentences, slightly spitting toothpaste on me. I shielded myself, getting up from the couch trying my hardest not to smile and stood outside their dressing room.

After spitting and washing his mouth, Ashton appeared at the doorway and placed his hands on my cheeks.

“Sorry beautiful, was just trying to make you smile.” I bit on my tongue while looking up at him.

“Well I appreciate you guys trying. For a minute there I thought it would work but you guys aren’t that hilarious.” I crossed my arms and he scuffed at me, draping his arm around my shoulder.

“Come here you little shit, I need to talk to you before the show, seriously.” I gulped at the last word. Instead of running away in fear of what was to come, I nodded my head and followed him to the side of the stage where you could see fans walking around, finding their seats, and sitting and watching the stage with anticipation. Ashton took my hands in his before looking out into the growing crowd with a blinding smile.

“These guys,’ he gestured to the fans, ‘are the most important thing in the world to me, next to my family.” I smiled at the girls and boys with tears in their eyes, as they realized they’d be seeing and connecting with the 3 fantastic boys I knew, and Calum. “I never imagined that you would be up there with them.” I turned back to him, my eyes practically bulging out of my head. My hands started sweating in his, my mouth also becoming dry. I didn’t expect to mean this much to him, I thought that we’d have a best friend relationship come out of this, but I didn’t see this coming. He stepped closer, so close I could feel his hot shaking breathe on my forehead and nose.

“I know you’re still hurting over Calum, I get it. And I know you’re not in any shape or form ready to commit to someone again like you did him, even if it wasn’t an official thing. But I promise you, if you let me be the guy for you, I’ll mend you and help bring you back to the happy girl you once were, the one who didn’t feel broken everyday. We’ll go on more breakfast runs, and I’ll sing you new songs I write, and I’ll leave little notes for you around the hotel room to make you smile every chance you get. Please, will you be mine?” 

I didn’t have time to react or comprehend any of his words before we heard a large sigh come from the side of us in front of the hallway. I looked up quickly to see my devastated Maori boy with a bouquet of deep red roses in his hands. His shoulders slump and lips in a pout. I pulled my hands back from Ashton’s, an appalled look in his eyes.

He cleared his throat and said, “Calum, who are those for?” Calum’s eyes shot back to the flowers in his hands, and he shook his head, jutting out his chin.

“They’re for, uh, they’re for Nia. I was looking for her right now.” His face instantly read as stone cold, and his collarbones and veins in his arms were clearly visible. Ashton shook his head confused and irritated, “Ok then, go look for her else where.”

Calum pursed his lips letting his head hang low, and jogged off behind Ashton. Even though he was out of his view, he wasn’t out of mine. From the corner of my eye, I saw him stop at the silver waste bin, and angrily chucked the flowers into it, before walking to the other side of the stage. I bit my lip trying to hold back the furiously hot tears, as Ashton turned back to me.

“Now, where were we?

Calum’s POV / before seeing Ashton and Y/N…

I walked backstage toward the boy’s and I’d dressing room, hoping Y/N would be in there relaxing like she usually does. I carried about 8 roses in my hands because the flower shop I went to didn’t carry 12 rose bouquets and the next number up was 20 which in my opinion was too many at this point. I figured I wasn’t doing anything helpful for the situation her and I were in. It was only making our group hangouts uncomfortable, and every time I saw her, my chest caved in and I suddenly couldn’t speak. So, I thought about buying her some flowers as a forgiveness token, and rehearsed telling her my true feelings for her instead of yelling them at her last time. 

As I approached the room, I peered inside to see only Michael and Luke and Luke’s girlfriend. They all sat on their phones, all eyes staring up at me when I entered.

“Oooooo Cal, who the flowers for?” Arzaylea spoke up. I let out a chuckle and looked down at the beautiful set of carnations.

“Please tell me they’re not for who we think they’re for?” Luke said, Michael nodding and agreeing with him.

“It’s just a piece offering. I still love and care for her Luke, I just want the old girl I had back…” He sighed, going back to scrolling on his phone.

“She went down the hall to the side of the stage.” Michael said, and I nodded my head at him before striding off.

I could start to here voices down by the side of the stage and making out figures of bodies. I then realized she wasn’t alone. Ashton was there, hands in hers and my blood started rushing through my veins, picking up my adrenaline. 

My stomach cramped, my ears turned red, my chest felt like it had the wind knocked out of it, as I heard the dreaded words come out of Ashton’s mouth.


It all was in slow motion. His words, the crowds chatter, my own heart beat. It felt like the world had slowed down, letting the pain linger in my body and letting the pain hit me hard and slow, the worst way possible. My hands clutched onto the paper surrounding the flowers, making her head snap in my direction.

I’ll never forget the look in her eyes, the same look she had when I caught her sleeping with Ashton. She was petrified, she was heart broken, she knew she was in the wrong. I guess this was the moment in time when the universe is telling us to stop trying. To stop thinking we’d ever make it as a couple, it was all a fantasy, a dream that slowly was turning into a nightmare. 

I wouldn’t have ever called this love, if love hurt this bad.

Omg ok so obviously this is a sorta cliff hanger so if y’all want a part 6, request it! Also read my other stories in my masterlist and await the next part of Gotta Go My Own Way! :)

Conversations with a White audience

Seeing a conversation about Sherlock: I don’t really watch the show. I have no idea what they are talking about.

Seeing a conversation about art: I am an artist, but I really don’t want to butt in. 

Seeing a political discussion about taxes: This doesn’t really affect me but maybe I should talk to help me get in the know?


After 10K notes dragging you: Fuck this website, I’m closing my account and open up a new one.

Seeing a conversation about Sherlock: I don’t really watch the show. I have no idea what they are talking about.

Seeing a conversation about art: I am an artist, but I really don’t want to butt in.

Seeing a political discussion about taxes: This doesn’t really affect me but maybe I should talk to help me get in the know?


After 10K notes dragging you: Fuck this website, I’m closing my account and open up a new one.

Seeing a conversation about Sherlock: I don’t really watch the show. I have no idea what they are talking about.

Seeing a conversation about art: I am an artist, but I really don’t want to butt in.

Seeing a political discussion about taxes: This doesn’t really affect me but maybe I should talk to help me get in the know?


After 10K notes dragging you: *writes a long letter that nobody read about being dragged three times and then close account immediately, following opening up a new account, getting extensions to block Black people*

Seeing a conversation about Sherlock: I don’t really watch the show. I have no idea what they are talking about.

Seeing a conversation about art: I am an artist, but I really don’t want to butt in.

Seeing a political discussion about taxes: This doesn’t really affect me but maybe I should talk to help me get in the know?


After 10K notes dragging you: WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?

Us: I’m sorry. Who are you?

Them: Y’all keep dragging me four times! WHAT did I do wrong?

Us: Doing the same thing over and over expecting a different result?

Deletes Note and block all parties: THERE!

Seeing a conversation about Sherlock: Fuck it, I’ll watch Sherlock. 

tumblr gothic
  • you scroll down your dashboard. people are talking about the new update. it has not affected you yet, and you are warned of it. it will come. it will grab you by the throat and seize you and spit you back out. it will kill you.
  • a new meme appears on your dashboard. you do not know where it came from or how it began. everybody seems to be reblogging this meme. you do not, and voices thrum in your ears, compelling you to reblog it.
  • you are following someone, and you are unsure as to why. curious, you look at their blog and find nothing of interest, nothing that points you to one of your friends being this strange blogger. you have always been following this blog. you cannot unfollow this blog.
  • tumblr changes daily. you cannot recognize your dashboard anymore. everything changes, even the people you are following. 
Often (Sebastian Stan Imagine)

A/N: young!seb what else do you need? 

Song Inspiration: Often by Abhi Dijon 


Cold hands and beer cans
That’s how we used to chill

“How do you always have the hook-ups when it comes to alcohol, Seb?” Y/N marveled at the cooler filled with beer cans and hard liquor. “Seriously, holy shit. And where do you get the money from?”

“Don’t stress about it.” He gave her a toothy grin. “Let’s just get fucked up tonight, yeah?”

She smirked, a mischievous twinkle in her eye. “Let’s do it.”

You took the Dodge from your mom
And parked it up the hill

On top of Signal Hill, Y/N and Sebastian would sit on the hood of his father’s car and drink and laugh and eat and stay there for hours. Y/N wasn’t a party girl. She never got drunk with anyone else besides him. She was a good student, always have and always will be. He, on the other hand, is okay. He hangs on his schoolwork with the usual C’s, sometimes B’s when he’s lucky. 

But they were best friends. They were best friends since their high school freshman year. Ever since he bumped into her twenty times a week on the way to his classes. The universe just kept giving them signals that they should be in each other’s lives.

Although Sebastian thought they were being pushed together because it was their destiny, Y/N, at the time, didn’t think so. She was being chased after by a guy, a year older than them both when their friendship first started. The boy was popular already, making the varsity team of all the sports he joined. The typical jock falls for the cute nerd type of love story.

But Sebastian stuck around in hopes that one day, her feelings will reciprocate his. 

You said
“I can’t wait forever”

“I wanna be an actor.” He exclaimed aloud, taking a swig from his Budweiser can. “I wanna be an actor and I wanna be known for what I do. I think that’s why I’m not the best in school. Because its not a way to express yourself creatively, you get me?”

Y/N just laughed, glancing at him. “Dude, you’re just pissed drunk right now. Which you shouldn’t be because you’re driving, loser.”

“Oh, shit.” Sebastian said, his eyes widening in realization. “We can crash here for a few hours right? The seats recline.”

“The things I do for you Stan.”

“Oh yes because reclining a chair and sleeping on it is such hard work compared to me putting my life on the line every time I pick up our drinks from some sketchy guy in an alley. Sure, Y/N.”

“Hey, you said it was no problem!” Y/N argued. “I never asked for you to do that, you did that all on your own.”

“You’re right, sweetheart. Blame me.” He couldn’t help but stare at her face as the words left his lips. “But seriously, I wanna be an actor.”

“But seriously, if that’s really something you wanna pursue, then I’m 110% behind you for that.” 

Verse from a radio
Feet above the wheel

“Ugh, tell me again why we do this every month when we get this sick afterwards?” Y/N groaned, leaning against the car window as she props her feet up the dashboard.

“Oh, suck it up. You’re almost 21, you need to get used to this because once we’re legal, we’re hitting every bar in town.”

“Seb, we have 5 more years until we’re 21, we’re barely 17.” She chuckled. “And you do realize drinks cost money, right? Are you gonna be working?”

“Well duh!” Seb made a face at her. “Actor, remember?”

“Oh yeah, my bad Mr. DiCaprio.”

“Mr. Stan.” He corrected. “Just wait on it, Y/N. People will know my name.”

Y/N smiled. For a second she felt sober. She wanted to remember the look on his face as he talked about his passion. “I have no doubt that that will happen, Seb.”

“Thanks, Y/N.” Seb’s smile became wider as a familiar tune filled their ears. “I love this song.”

She just watched him as he screamed out lyrics to an irrelevant song. Sebastian made up his own drunken dance moves and stumbled over lyrics but he was having the time of his life. Y/N knew that there was no way she would let him walk out of her life. Not soon, not ever. 

Leaning back in the backseat
It’s like the world was still

“I wish I could stay in this moment forever.” 

The sky was dark but the city was lit up. With all the lights from buildings and show lights on the busy Saturday night. It was 11:30 PM and they could hear the faint noises coming from a concert a few miles back. 

Seb looked over at Y/N who was leaned against her palm, tapping her finger along with a random beat in her head. He thought she was beautiful. She was glowing. Always, no matter what she did, no matter the time of day. She was always glowing. The feelings he had for her were insane. It was killing him to keep them hidden. He watched the many, many, guys try to get with her with flowers and cards and chocolates. But she turns them down almost every time. He was relieved every time she does it. It gives Seb more time to make his own move on her.

“Do I have something on my face or something?”

“No, no.” He looked away immediately, looking at his side mirror. “I didn’t realize I was dozing off in your direction.”

“Oh, okay.” 

You said
“I can’t wait forever”

“I like you.” Seb blurted out after fifteen minutes of utter silence between them. It wasn’t awkward, it was rather comfortable. “Scratch that, I’m in love with you.”

“Seb, you’re drunk.”

“Exactly.” He sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. “If I wasn’t drunk, I wouldn’t have had the guts to tell you this. Y/N, I’m in love with you.”

“Seb, we both know you’re just too out of it right now. We’ll talk about this when you’re sober.”

“Y/N.” He whined. “Listen to me. I am sober enough to know that my feelings for you are real. They have been here since you were dating what’s his name? The jock guy?”


“Yeah, him. I have had feelings for you since Matthew was in your life.”

Y/N’s eyes widened, “That was two years ago.”

“I waited two years to tell you how I feel. I couldn’t wait anymore. I can’t wait forever.”

I remember the windows were fogging
And we were nodding off ‘cause we both were drunk

The car windows were foggy the next morning. They rolled all of them all the way up to keep as much coldness out of the car. Y/N got cold easily. 

In the middle of the night, Sebastian woke up and took off his hoodie and draped it over her body. He knew her cardigan wouldn’t be enough. Y/N slept with two blankets during summer nights. 

Sebastian dreamt that he never said anything to her that night and that their friendship was still bulletproof. He was afraid now because when he wakes up again and she remembers it all, what would she say? Does she feel the same way? Does she not?

He barely slept that night. And the car seat being uncomfortable wasn’t the only reason why. 

I had my hands in your pockets
And a cop came and he woke us up softly
I think of that often

Sebastian woke up to a light tapping on the car window. He rubbed his eyes, squinting as the blinding sun pierced through the windshield. He rolled down the window to see a policeman. 

“Son, the park is closed at this hour. I’m gonna have to ask you guys to leave.”

“Yes, of course, officer.” Seb apologized, starting the engine. “I’m sorry.”

As he pulled away from the parking spot, he took a glance at Y/N’s sleeping state. Her hands somehow found their way inside the pockets of his hoodie. It was a sigh he wanted to remember forever. 

It was only 6:27 AM, he didn’t expect her to wake up until at least two hours from now. He reminded himself to drive slowly to not cause her to stir so much. He watched out for little dips in the road and kept the radio turned off for the one hour ride home. 

He didn’t want to wake Y/N up. He was dreading her response.

Do you remember that letter I sent you
That winter when we were seventeen?

“So you’re gonna be gone the whole winter break?”

Y/N nodded, “Yeah seems like it, and a little bit after that.” 

“That sucks.” He frowned. “Who am I supposed to spend Christmas with now?”

“Your family, dummy!” She laughed. “Spend time with them. It’s the holidays.”

“They’re not as fun as you, but okay.” Sebastian wrapped his arm around her shoulder. “I guess I’ll just have to mail your present to you.”

“Thanks, Seb.” Y/N’s gaze shifted and she was looking at her feet. “About the other night…”

His heart started beating fast, removing his arm from her body slowly. “What night?”

“The night at Signal Hill.”

“Oh, that night.” He laughed. “I don’t remember anything from that night.”

Y/N’s heart broke. He was just drunk. He didn’t feel the way she did. That was just plain obvious. But of course he felt the same way, he was just too chicken to risk if she feels the same too.

Sayin’ that I wish we’d get married
And we could pack our bags and run away from all our problems
I think of that often

“Dear Y/N,

I told you I would mail your present to you. Did you think I was playing? I don’t play like that.

Well, merry christmas. I have a lot to say to you that I never said before. First off, I’m so glad you’re in my life and that you’ve stuck around for two years dealing with me and my problems. I can’t imagine my life without you now. Second of all, I hate the idea of us moving to New York together. It’s so overpopulated there. It doesn’t seem that great- wait actually, scratch that. As long as I’m with you, I’ll live in an overpopulated, crappy city.

Lastly, Signal Hill. I remember everything from that night. Every detail. I don’t know why I didn’t tell you before. But I am in love with you. I’m so in love with you that it hurts me sometimes. You make me feel things I never thought I could ever feel. You make me feel like how they feel in the rom-com movies you drag me to. Like that. I look at you and I think, ‘wow, i can marry this girl.’ Maybe that’s too straight forward for you but I don’t really care anymore. I’m tired of hiding out.

I love you, Y/N Y/L/N. So so much. Merry Christmas.

- S. STAN. xx”

I’m wishin’ I could find you
I’m wishin’ I could tell you something
I think of you often


He turned around to see a face he hasn’t seen in two months. Y/N. “You’re back! Oh my gosh, you’re back. How was the trip?”

She stayed silent for a while. “I’m in love with you, too.”


My Last Imagine: Kiss Me Slowly (Bucky Barnes Imagine)


Your Greatest Fear

A/N: So, this is my first Avenger fic. But, it will not be the last. I absolutely love Iron Dad, so you’re gonna be seeing that a lot.

Dad!Tony x Daughter!Reader

Word Count: 1,000+

Summary: You express your greatest fear to your dad.

Growing up as the daughter of Tony Stark was hard. People looked at you and expected that you would turn out just like your father. Rich, successful, influential, etc.

But, that wasn’t what made growing up so hard. Once your dad became Iron Man, things changed.

If someone didn’t know who he was before, they certainly did now. You were only ten at the time. And, having your dad held hostage all the way on the other side of the world was traumatic for a ten-year old.

You were relieved when you heard that he was okay. But, ever since then, you’ve acquired a certain fear.

What would happen if your dad didn’t come home one day? Especially after he joined the Avengers.

He was always getting into danger. What would happen if he was caught off guard?

You had just turned sixteen when the Avengers split. And, you were crushed. You had become close to all of the Avengers, and just like that, they were divided.

Your dad came home beaten and bloody after going after Steve and the Winter Soldier.

And, you didn’t know what to think.

Your dad nearly died fighting Captain America, who you had always seen as an uncle.

He was always in harm’s way. And, one of these days, he might not make it out.

You looked out the window in your room at the Avengers Tower. It had been about two weeks since the whole Civil War fiasco.

To the world, it looked as if nothing had changed. But, for you, everything had changed.

You let out a sigh, wiping away a tear threatening to fall. You wouldn’t cry. Not again. You had shed enough tears.

A knock on the door turned your attention away from your inner sorrow. “Come in.”

Your dad opened the door, “Hey, sweet pea. Vision’s making dinner. It should be ready in a few minutes.”

“Sounds good, Dad.” Your tone was flat and lacked emotion.

Your tone did not go unnoticed by Tony. He walked over to you, shoving his hands in his pockets. “What? You don’t like Vis’s cooking?”

You didn’t respond.

Tony sighed, “Okay, (Y/N), what’s wrong? You’ve been down for weeks. Where’s that smile? You look better when you smile.”

You huffed, gazing at the ground, “How can I smile when my family has been torn apart?”

Tony looked at you, his expression grim, “Oh, that’s what this is about.”

You said nothing, looking out the window again.

Tony didn’t say anything either. He knew that this whole Civil War was hard on you. The Avengers weren’t just Earth’s Mightiest Heroes to you. They were your family.

“Let’s talk, okay?” Your dad wrapped his arm around your shoulder and led you towards your bed.

He sat you down on the bed then sat next to you.

You waited for him to say something, but he didn’t. He just stared at you.

He gestured with his hand for you to say something, “I’m waiting. Come on. Just say what’s on your mind. I won’t interrupt. Much.”

You looked at him then sighed, “It’s just that…I don’t know.” You stroked back your (Y/H/C) hair, “You wanna know what my greatest fear is?”

Tony chuckled, “You? Afraid? Of what?”

Your expression told him that you were not in a joking mood.

“Dad, ever since you became Iron Man, you’ve had so many near-death experiences that I’ve lost count. You’ve come home beaten and bloody so many times. That’s something a young child shouldn’t see. But, I got used to it.”

You looked up at him, and his eyes were focused solely on you. But, you could tell he was thinking about your words.

“But, the more times you came home hurt, the more I realized that you’re not invincible. You can’t see everything coming. And, one of these days, you…might not make it home. You’re good, Dad. Really good. But, even you can’t prepare for everything. I grew up with the fear that one day I would wake up, and someone would tell me that you were gone. And…” You couldn’t continue as tears started to flow down your cheeks.

Tony just looked at you. He sighed, reaching out and pulling you into his chest.

You immediately wrapped your arms around your father, crying into his shoulder.

Tony let you cry, rubbing your back.

After a few minutes, your tears started to dry out.


You said nothing, wiping your eyes with your sleeve.

He held you at arm’s length, “Look, (Y/N), I know it’s hard. Being my kid. And, I get that. There’s a lot at stake for us Starks. And, yes, there are people in this world that don’t like me. Shocking, I know.”

You let out a small chuckle, which he smiled at it.

“And, I know I’ve come home looking not so pretty sometimes. But, I did come home. Because I have someone to come home to.” He poked your nose, causing you to smile slightly.

“You’re the reason I come home. If I’m in a tight spot, I think about you. And, that usually helps me think of a way out. I can’t see everything, you’re right. But, Starks are known for improvising. And, if improvising gets me home to my little girl, I’m good with that.”

You stared at him, thinking about his words. “What about Steve?”

Tony inhaled, “I’ll admit, I wasn’t prepared to fight Cap. And, he did quite a number on me. But, he knows just as well as I do that you’re waiting for me back home. He loves you, and he would never do that to you.”

You nodded, taking it all in, “Thanks, Dad. I’m glad I got this off my chest.”

He patted your back, “Me too. We don’t have many heart-to-heart chats. We need those every once in awhile.”

You chuckled, wrapping your arms around his neck.

He hugged you back, “FRIDAY, clear my schedule tomorrow.”

Right away, Mr.Stark. May I ask why?”

“I need to spend some time with my daughter.”

A/N: I can’t get the Keep Reading link working right now. So, until I do, I apologize for the space I’m taking up on your dashboard.

Imagine the squad catching you and Nick flirting at work

(A/N: For Anon, I hope you and everyone else enjoys this! Sorry for the long wait and that this is going up so late. Hope this is what you envisioned. I tried to make this a bit more suggestive than usual because I felt like that was in- character for Nick. Hope you don’t mind, always evolving! Also, I made Nick a Sergeant in this which I don’t think he was in the show but I remember him mentioning something about it in the last episode he was in)

Imagine the squad catching you and Nick flirting at work

“What are you doing?” You demanded as Nick drove passed the park.

“What do you think I’m doing Y/N? I’m driving us to work.” He countered, keeping his eyes on the road.

You narrowed your eyes and accused, “Why do you always do that?”

“Do what? Answer your questions?” He inquired.

“Question everything I say!” You replied, “If you had let me finish before being a smartass…”

“Then what you would have had time finished your stupid question?” He interrupted.

“Why are you being such a dick?” You demanded.

“Why are you asking me stupid questions at 6 in the morning?” He responded.

Keep reading

Who the Hell is Dick Grayson: Part 3

Originally posted by tonystrk

Prompt: Being Tony Stark’s daughter and dating Dick Grayson

Words: 1184

Part 1, Part 2

“Why do I feel like I’m getting ready to do a perp walk … as the perp?”

    You smile at your fiance from your metal chair, “Probably because we’re in an interrogation room with nosy, former government agents listening to every word we’re saying … while you’re changing.”

    Dick smiles at you, as he finishes buttoning his shirt, “Thanks for the insight, smart ass.”

    You giggle, “What can I say? It’s my superpower.” Dick stares at you for a minute, with that dopey smile on his face, “What?”

    He walks over to you and crouches down in front of you. He takes your hands, and places a kiss in the palm of each one. “I missed you so much. You have no idea.”

    You bring his hand up to your lips, and kiss the knuckles, “I have a fairly good idea, Richard Grayson.” You pause for a minute, before continuing, “I need you to know that I didn’t want to go. I didn’t have any say in it Dick.”

    Dick reaches forward and brushes a strand of hair out of your face, “I know.”

    The two of you stare at each other like the love sick pair your are, until a series of knocks on the door breaks you out of it. Dick straightens out of his crouch, but doesn’t let go of your hand. When a second series of knocks comes through, you stand up and take the lead.

    Dick follows behind you, trusting your instincts and your knowledge of the situation. You open the door to find yourself surrounded by Avengers. They’re curious, but you already knew that. Other dimensions, a chance of danger, and a superhero that works outside of their group may as well be a siren call to these people.

    And then there’s Natasha, she’s focused on you, with a grin on her face that says she’ll have every detail out of you by next week if not sooner. It’s almost enough to make you want to step behind Dick.

    Then he squeezes your hand and you feel stronger, which makes you smile, because Alfred had always said the two of you were stronger together. You continue walking forward, and like the Red Sea, the group parts. Their eyes are focused on Dick, but one glance at your fiancé tells you that he’s okay, or at the very least ignoring the busy bodies. You walk right out of S.H.E.I.L.D. and to your car.

    Dick grins at the sight of it, “Nice ride.”

    You smile as you slide into the driver’s side. “My dad bought it as a homecoming gift. He has a thing for cars.”

Dick grins at you as the door locks and the car starts silently. “You have a thing for cars.”

You grin as you pull out into traffic, “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

Dick scoffs, “Please whenever something was bothering you you’d head over to Wayne

Manor and park yourself under the Batmobile until you’d had time to work out what ever was going on. Bruce always said that car never ran better than when your were taking care of it.”

    You smile, “That’s what my dad and I would do whenever it was his weekend. I knew how to rebuild an engine by the time I was seven thanks to him.” You pause for a moment as you switch lanes, and an evil little smirk appears on your lips, “And by the way, the reason I kept working on the Batmobile was because I kept hoping you’d come and take me on top of it.”

    Dick’s eyes go wide, and he sputters for a moment, but before he can say anything, you make a sharp turn, that has him bracing against the dashboard. You press down harder on the gas, and the car speeds up. And when you glance over at Dick, he has a cocky little smile on his face, “You are so getting it when we get wherever we’re going.”

    You laugh, “Why do you think I’m doing 80?”

    You don’t leave your room for nearly a day. Friday sends up prepared food, and you and Dick just spend time together, among other things. He tells you about what you’ve missed and what’s going on back home. You catch him up on your relationship with your father.

    You finally leave you room, a little after twenty-four hours. Your engagement ring is back on your finger, and you’re dressed in pajama pants, and a tank top. You find him in the kitchen. He’s half way through a pint of rocky road, and you can tell from the circles under his eyes that he hasn’t slept.

    He says nothing as you take a seat next to him, and steal his spoon. After a minute he asks, “So having fun?”

    You nearly choke on your bite of ice cream. He pats your back a few times as you cough. When you’re able to breathe again you say, “Yeah, we finally beat level ten.”

    Your dad nods, and steals the spoon back, “And you’re engaged, how nice.”

    You look at the ring on your finger, “Have been for a while.”

    “Would have been nice to know about it.”

    You take a deep breath, “I honestly didn’t think it would matter.”

    “No, of course not. You just went to another dimension, and instead of trying to find a way back home you fell in love with some clown from the circus?”

Your eyes narrow, “First off he’s an acrobat, and second of all Clowns are a sore spot with him, so DO NOT BRING THEM UP!” You take a deep breath, “And third we had no relationship when I left. You weren’t my dad growing up.”

He stares at you for a moment before he hands you the spoon, “Yeah, I deserve that.”

You set the spoon down and wrap your arms around him, “But you’re my dad now.”

His arms wrap around you in a hug, “I regret it you know. Not being your dad. If I could do it again, I’d take full custody, and you never would have left my sight. You’d have been my buddy.”

You roll your eyes, “I am your buddy, and your daughter. But Dick is very important to me. I love him Dad, and to be honest I want him here.”

“He treats you right? He’s a good guy? Doesn’t spray water out of a flower at you or anything?”

You smile, “Like I said clowns are a very sore subject.”

“Fair enough. But I want to hear about it. All of it kid.”

You raise an eyebrow, “I’m sure Fury has everything. Especially if he’s been in contact with Waller.”

“All I heard was that he was born in a circus from Rhodey, and then I decided it was best to hear it from you. Especially as to what excuse those parents had for naming him Richard and calling him Dick. What is this the 1940’s?”

You smile, “That’s fair. You’ve shared with me, now it’s time that I share with you.”

600 Followers ‘thank you’

As I’ve reach 600 followers, I decided to do a ‘thank you’ for y’all who have stick with me, my doodles, my rants and sometimes shitpost (lol). I’ve done a little survey and here’s some thing I’m gonna do: doodle and mini aes moodboard

(Sorry if my English is confusing, it isn’t my first language)


  1. Should be following me, as this is a thank you for my followers :D (don’t want to use the world must lmao)
  2. Like or reblog this post, if this doesn’t reach 10 notes, not counting my timezone reblogs, I’ll pretend that nothing happened TvT
  3. Send me asks (preferably off anon so I can check) about anything; how was your day, why did you decide to follow me, talk to me about your dog, anything (I just wanna talk to you guys)! And then add what you want me to do. A moodboard or a doodle

For moodboards: please tell me what you like e.g. your favourite colour, hobby, favourite flowers etc. And I’ll do a 2x2 moodboard like this:

For doodles: send me a character, a pairing, or your selfie tag (yes I’ll draw you) and you’ll get stuff like these

I hope y’all would enjoy my little gift! Thank you again for following! x

edit: In addition, I want to say thank you to these amazing people on my dashboard, you are all awesome!

@50colonies @an-obscene-amount-of-hygge @aph-america @aph-lithuania @aph-poland @aph-monika-beilschmidt @aph-north-italy @berwaldisyummy @classica-mozartling @clueless-dullahan @drunkchocolatemilk @geniusartstuff @gretchenamspinnrade @hanatamagone @hetaliamatsu @hetare-hetalia@heyytalia @intcllectual @jones-wibu @kawaii-notes @koooolaaaaa @meme-tendo @mintowls @moosenotes @nakaharachuyaa @neco-choo @novaaquill @omuii @palmipalmio @ferferz @pandylin @pokadork @silverxsakura @so-into-studying @starfishies123 @starlight-beans @studitorium @studyblrmartini @swedenswfe @tiny-notes @trash-a-nator

piiess/pat x

#Goals (Asa x reader)

Anonymous said: could write one where the reader and asa are dating and they post pictures of each other on instagram and your relationship is all over tumblr and stuff like that and something rlly fluffy and relationship goals pleaseee

Here you go! I hope you like this, I was so much fun to write and I hope you enjoyed it!

Originally posted by asabutterfielded

Keep reading

importantshitposting  asked:

I was a fan of your writing. Then I became anxious in anticipation of an update of a story. While waiting, I respected your no asking about updates rule. Eventually I became upset as weeks and months passed by with inconsistent and sparse updates. Eventually I gave up, turned off your notifications and then unfollowed you. I am no longer in anticipation of your works so please don't view this as a update request. I would like to ask why you don't update. If I were that talented I'd post more.

Thank you for enjoying the works that I’ve had out and I really appreciate you reading them, but I can’t help but feel so disrespected by this ask of yours. Have you ever stopped to think about why I don’t post? I am choppy when it comes to posting and I know, and I also completely understand if you don’t like that and unfollowed me because that’s completely your choice. But I’m seriously not going to sit here and take this from you. I go to school and I go to work girl, I stayed up til 6 am studying for an exam this past Tuesday. I wake up at 8 am to get ready for class, drive half an hour there then have 1 hour to get back home and eat then go straight to work until 10 pm. Usually I get out around 10:30, then I go home and wash up and restart my day like that for the rest of the week. I just got home from work not long ago, and I had a pretty fucking shitty day because someone called in and I was left alone. Tumblr’s a place where I can get away to relax, and I logged in just now because there are really great people on here that end up brightening my day with their posts. I’ve never gotten a post like this so I don’t even know what to say? I’m just extremely upset right now because I just feel like you don’t even see me as a person? 

That’s just been the past few weeks, but if you want to know about what’s happened over the past months on why I haven’t updated I can just sum it up by saying I hated my fucking life. When I started work I got such bad anxiety, always telling myself I fucking sucked and I’m a burden to everyone and that I’m super annoying and dumb that I would start to uncontrollably shake for days (and yes, this was in February which was the last time I had a big update). I wouldn’t be able to sleep because I was so anxious, I couldn’t focus on studying and I couldn’t even go about my day without this affecting me. My left kidney barely works (15%) so I constantly have to go to the doctor to do check ups and exams, and that drains me out wondering whether or not it’s getting worse and I’m literally just waiting for the day it dies and I have to take it out. Stress plays a big factor on kidney function, so the more I was anxious the worst pain I got in my back. I continue to stress myself out when I shouldn’t and I know it’s bad but I can’t help myself and it sucks. 

In April, I lost my grandma. She got diagnosed with pancreatic cancer in October of last year so every single month I spent flying from Texas back to California to see her and help care for her since she was in hospice at my aunts before it got the best of her. I flew back 6 times, and spent about almost what, $2500 on plane tickets? I had to find ways to collect money before my job so I spent all my financial aid and baked sweets to gain that. After that I saved up my paychecks. In June, a friend of mine committed suicide. I’ve gone to school with him since 7th grade, and we used to talk but not so much over the years. I don’t know why it took such a big toll on me at the time, but I couldn’t help but feel so depressed those 2 weeks because all of my friends were friends with him too. I literally saw him a week or 2 before that, gave him a hug and chatted with him for a bit. He was such a nice guy, and was the kind of person who was known and loved by everyone. It’s been 3 months and I still can’t believe he’s not here anymore. A big part of me realized then I really take life for granted, and that’s when I lightened up and started feeling better about my job and myself. 

Yeah, you’re probably reading this like I’m being a little bitch and I always like to keep in my stress/problems because I don’t want to burden other people about it but I’m still amazed you had the audacity to send this. I’m being completely honest right now, I was planning on working on Cat Got Your Tongue this weekend because I finally got a spurt of inspiration this past week and was so excited since that hasn’t happened in so long. I don’t know if you’ve ever experienced writer’s block, but it fucking sucks and not only does it affect you as a reader but you’ve never thought that it hasn’t affected me either? Writing was a great outlet for me, and I also loved sharing my idea with others. I’m happy people enjoyed my writing and always hoped it could put a smile on someone’s face. Eventually I got stuck probably because part of my life got in the way and I didn’t have time for it. That also made me depressed because I couldn’t do something I enjoyed. I eventually got stuck in this nasty, stressful cycle and the only things that really saved me were my friends and people here on Tumblr.

I knew it got annoying and I can’t help but feel annoyed and disappointed in myself that I haven’t got anything out in so long, but it’s not that I don’t want to, it’s because I can’t. If you looked at my drafts you’d see I’m really trying right now, but about 5-6 fics are unfinished. One is that I don’t have time, and another is that I just can’t get myself into the groove of writing anymore. 

But I hope you realize that I’m not here on my ass in front of my laptop 24/7 to just cater to you? You think I’m just lounging around at my house and then ignoring people who have told me that they can’t wait to know what happens next in my fics? You don’t know how bad I feel when people say that. I always feel like I let them down, and even the recent fic I’m working on I think is pure shit and I don’t think I should even continue it. I feel like I’d let them down even more if I were to post that, so I want to have it perfect each time I post. Think about that too; I put in my fucking time because I care about what I post and I don’t post shit for just fucking notes or some dumb shit. If you knew me in real life you’d know that I hate fucking writing and it’s my least favorite subject, but i found a niche of writing I actually liked so I’m hard on myself when it comes to posting fics. 

If you really liked my stories, you’d see how much work I put into them. If you really liked my stories, I think it’s not much to ask you to understand I have a fucking life and there’s reasons i don’t post and that my life is not revolved around pleasing you or others. I ask for no one to ask about updates only because I hate responding with the same message, I don’t know. It’s going to be the same answer each time, and every time I tell people it just makes me feel worse because I hate that I can’t bring myself to do it and I feel like I really fucking suck and I know I do. Those asks clutter other people’s dashboards too, and what’s the point in those asks when I’ll never know when the update will be? 

Anyways, here’s your reason for why I haven’t updated. If you’re a reader I’d encourage you to start your own fics, that’s what happened to me when I couldn’t really find anymore fics to read or updates seized. It’s a fun, magical world, and over time you’ll grow and start getting better and better with it. You’ll also understand the work that comes with it and how difficult it is to actually produce a story and also juggling that time with your daily life. You say I’m talented, and that I should post more, but I really don’t think my ass brings any shit to the table compared to all these other amazing writers with great content on this website. Sorry I disappointed you and I can’t give you what you want, so I’m glad you unfollowed me because I don’t want to keep you hanging since I never know when I’ll update. You can easily find other users here that produce writing 10000x better than me, so check them out instead! But please, just understand they’re people with their own lives too and don’t ever send them an ask as disrespectful as this. Don’t let them feel bad about themselves, don’t tell them you were upset because they don’t update according to your calendar. Appreciate them for what they put out, thank them for putting all their time and effort into their works, tell them how much you love their stories and cheer them on and continue to support and respect them for when they have time to update. Thanks and sorry again

Wayhaught Uber AU by greywing

So I jokingly asked for a Wayhaught Uber AU earlier today and my good buddy (and one of my favorite writers ever!) @morningmightcomebyaccident wrote the following drabble in all of 10 minutes. 10 minutes!!! She wrote it in the replies of the original post, but I took the liberty of copying, pasting, and formatting it below.  Bless you grey!!! This cheered me up something fierce! Ofc, now I’m gonna need a 185k word fic about their blossoming friendship-turned-love. ;)

Keep reading


if you ever call someone out about unfollowing (directly or via vague-blogging) your blog how about this:


you have no idea why someone is unfollowing you, and while it may feel personal and like it has to do with something that you can improve on, if that person hasn’t come to you to talk to you about it they’re probably uncomfortable about it and you cornering them and pestering them about why they unfollowed you is NOT helping the situation. 

maybe they unfollowed you because you’re posting too much ooc content, maybe you rp subjects they don’t agree with – these are all things they’re free to disagree with and NOT SEE THE CONTENT OF ON THEIR DASHBOARD IF THEY SO CHOOSE. every time someone gets an anon regarding the topics of what’s on someone’s blog, what’s the default answer? unfollow me. so if someone does just that and you track them down like “UM YOU UNFOLLOWED ME WHY???” what, uh, what do you think that’s doing/solving?

maybe they unfollowed you because you have a partner you ADORE and constantly are interacting with but they just don’t like (personal problems, maybe they don’t like seeing duplicates of their own muses, etc…) so they unfollow you to avoid seeing THAT person.

the point is you don’t get to police or even ASK people about why they made their dashboard and overall experience more comfortable for themselves, and if that means they needed to unfollow you then so be it. 

try not to take everything so personally okay? unless someone’s come to you and said “i’m unfollowing you because you’re a piece of shit and your portrayal sucks byeeeee” it probably really isn’t personal AT ALL.

Things I Have Thought About Whilst Sleep Deprived

-when you have Adrien and Nath in a couple it’s so pure but if you have chat noir and Evillustrator it’s nothing but sin
-that lyric in Hometown sounds like ‘shadow threw an egg at me’
-would lava put out a fire before starting it’s own
-why are all the adrinath fics written in Spanish
-I’d marry dodie Clark (I texted this to my friend and he replied with 'maddy you’re straight’)
-If I asked the official ml blog about future relationships between Adrien and Nath would they even answer
-I think I need to change my profile picture
-if I see one more picture of Lila Rossi on my dashboard I’m going to spoon my eyes out with a fucking spork (no offence to people who like Lila)
-why do people hate me
-Marinette is actually very terrifying
-why aren’t any of the hot characters mains
-can I skin this whole grape with my teeth
-can I skin this whole walnut with my teeth (also sent to my friend who replied 'you cannot don’t try’)
-why do I have skin
-how come when you peel a carrot you just get more carrot but when you peel a human it’s GUYS AND BLOOD EVERYWHERE
-I feel like eating chocolate


Fandom: Transformers Prime

Pairing: Bulkhead/Wheeljack

Summary: Miko is not as indestructible as she’d like you to believe. When she’s injured on a mission, it causes some tension between Bulkhead and Wheeljack. 

@snuffes commissioned me to write her 500 words of Wrecker fluff. I ended up writing 846 words, because I loved the prompt and I love Miko and also I’m trash. 

Keep reading

Jingle Balls

Summary: Negan Claus is coming to town.
Request Summary: 2-in-1.
1. “Can you do one where there’s a girl in the Sanctuary that really likes Christmas and she misses it when it starts getting cold again and she’ll hum Christmas songs and so on. So Negan starts leaving her Christmas-y stuff that he finds on runs” – Anon. 2. “Can you do a imagine with negan x liv (my name) :)))??” - @ahappysoul0
POV: Liv
Characters: Negan, Liv
Word Count: 1862
Warnings: Cursing
Author’s note: Wow, would you look at that. I’ve finally done a one-shot. 
Parts: 1/1 - Completed
Quote of the story: “Damn, how about you switch it up and jingle my balls for a change instead of busting them all the damn time.”


Keep reading

December 5th- Camping

Hey guys, I’m hella psyched for this prompt. You know when you’re falling asleep and so you write fanfic in your head? (just me? ok.) well, I always use this as a base and so I’ve got some ideas. Lit. I shouldn’t say that. Rad. NO. Okay whatever. Here are the prompts for the countdown . Enjoy!

Baz sat in the front seat of Penny’s minivan, holding a list,

“Alright, do we have everyth- Simon! Get your feet off the dashboard!” 

“Why do you care? It’s not your car.” Simon said through a mouthful of cheese and onion crisps,

Because,” Baz said, moving Simon’s dirty trainers off the dashboard, “It’s not your car either.”

“Okay, whatever, Mr. Rational.” Simon said and leaned in for a cheese and onion kiss,

“I am not kissing you with that breath.” Baz said, completely repulsed, 

“Alright, whatever. Let’s get going! I can’t wait to sit under the stars and eat delicious hot shmos!”Simon said. Baz grinned at his boyfriend,

“Was that a Toy Story reference?”

“Might have been.”

Two hours and twelve snack sized bags of crisps later Simon and Baz are finally sitting in front of their campsite, 

“It’s a patch of dirt with a circle of rocks.” Simon proclaimed, 

“Quite right, love.”

“Where do we sleep?”

“The tent.”

“Is it see through on the top?”

“Um, no.”

“But then we can’t see the stars.” Simon complained. He made a face and crossed his arms like a four year old,

“You’ve got a star right here.” Baz reminded Simon,

“Ha ha.” Simon grinned and leaned in for a kiss, this one successful.

That night, the two boys lay in the tent, Simon’s head on Baz’s stomach,

“Do you remember when we visited the stars?” Simon mumbled, a tad drunk,

“Yes.” Baz said. He remembered it well. It was one of the fondest of memories that hid inside his brain, nestled behind a few sour ones that had been shoved there carelessly. Someone had to organize those files some time,

“I don’t know if I have enough magic to take us back, but I could show you the stars…” Baz fished for his wand in his pocket and cast a spell on the roof of the tent. Tens of thousands of stars shone above them like diamonds. Simon marvelled at the display in front of him,

“They do look like you.” Simon said, dreamily. And then there he was. Baz was back again. Back to that place where joy filled his soul and all he could see were stars.



( @carryon-countdown )

In Honor of Barricade Day! (As well as Pride Month!) 

Target Selected: Enjolras

(Modern AU ft. Established Enjoltaire)

The sun is brutal, unrelenting; there’s not a single cloud in the sky to offer even the smallest amount of relief from the bright rays heating everything in sight. It can easily be argued to be one of the hottest days of the year, but Enjolras couldn’t care less.

Keep reading