why do you do these things to my soul

My Own Boy,

Your sonnet is quite lovely, and it is a marvel that those red-roseleaf lips of yours should be made no less for the madness of music and song than for the madness of kissing. Your slim gilt soul walks between passion and poetry. I know Hyacinthus, whom Apollo loved so madly, was you in Greek days. Why are you alone in London, and when do you go to Salisbury? Do go there to cool your hands in the grey twilight of Gothic things, and come here whenever you like. It is a lovely place and lacks only you; but go to Salisbury first.

Always, with undying love,

Yours, Oscar

—  Oscar Wilde to Lord Alfred Douglas

Is no one going to talk about the scene at the end of Beauty and The Beast (2017) where everyone is turning into “antiques”? It starts with Lumiere crying over Plumettes motionless body & I’M SHOOK! GARDEROBE & CADENZA REACH FOR EACH OTHER FOR THE FIRST TIME IN FOREVER & THEN THEY SLOWLY FADE AWAY. & Then Mrs. Potts is looking for Chip & then she freezes & Chip almost crashes to the ground?!?!?! MY SOUL LEFT MY DAMN BODY!! And then Cogsworth says to Lumiere “It’s been an honor serving with you my friend?” WHAT THE HELL?!?! THAT WAS TRAUMATIZING!! DISNEY WHY DO YOU DO THESE THINGS WITH MY HEART; I FELT MY CHILDHOOD DIE!!

I wish that I could show you - this black thing that is my soul. I wish that I could lift it up, outside of myself, and place it in front of your magnificent eyes. Saying, here, look, this is me - and I am sorry I am always hiding. But, look, here, this is me, and now… can you understand? Look - there - into the blackness, can you understand my silence now? Look - there - into the pain… Can you understand why I hide away? But, look, there - come even closer - it is tangled up in everything. Do you see it, my love? Do you see it at all? This is my love for you. Do you see how it is knotted up into every part of me? Do you see how it saturates, unbroken, throughout my entire being?
—  Helaena Moon
2

You come to me dressed like my sister, with my death in your coat. No matter that it is not my death. You thought it eas. Why do you do this things. even knowing that those girls sew away my armies through this very hour?

[…] I will tell you why. Because you are a demon like me. And you do not care very much if other girls have suffered, because you want only what you want. You will kill dogs, and hound old women in the forest, and betray any soul if it means having what you desire, and that makes you wicked, and that makes you a sinner, and that makes you my wife.

Night Call Ch. IV

Genre: Angst

Jaebum Stalker AU! x Reader

Chapter I Chapter II Chapter III 

Just your love // Just your shadow // Just your voice // And my soul…

“The body of Kim Jinwoo, CEO of WINNER LLC, has been found in the alley not far from his home. He was brutally murdered but so far no evidence has been found pointing towards who could have played a part in his unfortunate death.”

 JB quickly stared down at you as your choked sobs filled your living room.

 “I—I had just seen him! Who could do such a thing! He was such a good man! Why would anyone do such a thing JB!”

 Pulling you into his warm chest, JB quietly soothed you. Placing his hand under your chin, he lifted your face and was welcomed by your tear-covered face.

 “Because you’re mine baby”


“What?”

Voice shaky, you forced yourself to sound strong and confront the man who you had began to seek comfort in.  A sigh left Jaebum’s mouth as he wiped a solitary tear away from your face.

“I probably shouldn’t have said that right?”

A chuckle resonated in the now quiet room, before he continued,

“But it’s true. You’re mine now that he’s out of the way. You’ll see that you’re better off without him…that you’re better off with me. So stop crying over that waste, Jinwoo. On second thought keep crying, I think this is the most beautiful I’ve seen you”

Although you had forced yourself to look him in his eyes, to see the man who had comforted you crumble before you and confront the monster that lied beneath his surface, and hear his confession, but it was too much. You felt the bile rising, as you forced yourself out of his embrace and ran towards the bath room, letting it all flow out of you. The bile, pain, your feelings for Jinwoo, everything.  

“Aw baby was that too much? I know I should’ve eased you into the idea but I felt I should be honest with you. Plus you did ask me so how could I possibly lie to that face?”

Coming towards you, Jaebum effortlessly lifted your drained body from the toilet bowl, taking you in his arms. Your arms reached out to push him away but it was of no use. There was no way you could possibly move the man before you in your state.

“L—Let me go Jaebum”

As you felt your vision blackening you knew you had to force something out, anything.

“Baby I’m cruel but not that cruel. You could really hurt yourself if I were to let you go right now. Just sleep, I’ll take care of you…I’ll take care of everything.”

The last thing you saw as your eyes began to close was Jaebum’s smiling face and blackened eyes, as he looked down at you.


As your eyes began to open, you took in your darkened room and you couldn’t help the thought that ran through your mind.

Had it all been a nightmare?

Lifting your body from the bed, you clutched your head in your hands, feeling slightly dizzy. Looking down at your body, you were in the same clothes as before, black leggings and a white cropped tank top. So maybe it had been nightmare and Jaebum had just moved your sleeping body to your bed instead.

Yeah that had to be it…

Taking cautious steps, you made your way through the darkened hallway towards the light shining from the kitchen and living room. What you hadn’t expected to see was Jaebum seated at your dining table, his image completely changed. Not only was his hair black now, eyes just as dark, his appeared to be lost in thought, until the cold wood floor creaked under your foot, alerting him of your presence.

Eyes widening in fear, his predatory stare rooted your feet to the spot.  A smirk overtaking his features as he allowed you to really see him.

Had this been the man I almost fell for?

“Your finally up! I’ve been going back and forth with JB and I feel that it’s best if I let you know everything and broke down the rules for you”

JB? The rules?

JB? You’re JB and what rules are you fucking talking about?  I had thought this was all a dream Jaebum. How could you do this to Jinwoo! To me!”

Fighting back the tears, you took a breath. You wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of seeing your tears. Ever.

“Baby don’t EVER raise your voice at me. I promise you don’t want to see me angry. Now just sit down and I’ll explain everything. If you’re good I’ll maybe even cook dinner”

Forcing down the lump in your throat, you took confident steps towards the dining table, before seating yourself directly in front of him. Eyes boring into his, you challenged him.

I won’t submit

“Though I am upset that you would mistake me for that shy and sad excuse for a man JB, I’ll forgive you. Unlike him, I know how to take what is mine and how to punish those who think they can challenge that. Jinwoo was in our way and needed to be dealt with. JB didn’t have the balls to do it so I took control. The man you thought you knew isn’t here anymore Y/N. It was a bit tiring playing nice on our date when all I wanted to do was ravage you and show you who you belonged to but I endured. I actually let you have a peek at me and you seemed to like it. I could tell by your eyes that you were drawn to me. You can’t lie to me about that. Had that news coverage not caused me to confess sooner, I would have had you screaming my name as I pounded into it but instead here we are. Yes I killed Jinwoo but you should have never chose him. Do you understand Y/N? You’re mine, all mine.”

You couldn’t help the chill that ran down your spine as he properly confessed everything. So there are two personalities? The sweet man who moved me into my apartment is no longer here? Instead I’m left with his murderous self?

“You can tell yourself that I’m yours all you want but I’ll never be yours Jaebum. You’re right I was attracted to you BUT THAT WAS BEFORE YOU MURDERED THE MAN WHO I HAD FEELINGS F— ”
Jaebum’s fist slamming against the table caused you to halt your sentence, eyes wide and full of fear. His face was red and his eyes were slits glaring at you, jaw jutting out,

“I DON’T GIVE A FUCK ABOUT YOUR FEELINGS FOR HIM! I’M THE ONLY ONE YOU BETTER HAVE FEELINGS FOR AND YOU BETTER GET IT THROUGH YOUR HEAD BECAUSE IT WILL MAKE IT A LOT EASIER FOR THE BOTH OF US. I’M TRYING TO KEEP MYSELF TOGETHER SO DON’T CHALLENGE ME!”

The only thought going through your head a you stared at the man full of rage was, is there a way to get JB back?

Closing his eyes and taking a breath to calm himself down, Jaebum ran a hand through his darkened locks.  Once he felt he had calmed down enough, a smile on gracing his features, he continued,

“Now for the rules…”

Credit to The xx, Lips 

Friends and Dreams

Please don’t share your dreams with the entire world, and forgive me if this seems a bit negative.  I assure you that is not my intention.  By all means do dare to dream, and always follow your heart, just don’t shout your plans, hopes and desires to every ear within hearing range.  Why?  Sadly my answer is simple, it’s because most people do not care, and as crazy as it may sound, some will even actually hope you fail.  Don’t worry, I’ll never understand that one either. Yet before I give us all a severe case of depression, do not fret, God and the universe have sent us some most special souls for the very purpose of sharing such things.  They’re called friends, and the true ones will gladly listen.  So, how do you know when someone is a friend that you can trust with your heart?  Might I suggest you give this a try.  Metaphorically only, the next time you’re on life’s mountain top, higher than you’ve ever gone before, ready to take one step more, look around you.  There amongst the throng of naysayers and those hoping you’ll fall flat on your face, will be a small yet loving group, wearing knowing smiles with fingers crossed, whispering I can’t wait to watch you fly.  I guess friends and dreams are like love and springtime, they just seem to go together.    Love, Mike         

2

“…You come to me dressed like my sister, with my death in your coat. No matter that it is not my death. You thought it was. Why do you do these things, even knowing that those girls sew away at my armies through this very hour?” Koschei wrapped his arms around her and drew her close. Marya shut her eyes against him, her lover, her death, her life. But she was afraid, too, of all of the things he could be. “I will tell you why. Because you are a demon, like me. And you do not care very much if other girls have suffered, because you want only what you want. You will kill dogs, and hound old women in the forest, and betray any soul if it means having what you desire, and that makes you wicked, and that makes you a sinner, and that makes you my wife.”

–Catherynne M. Valente, Deathless

My Own Boy,

Your sonnet is quite lovely, and it is a marvel that those red rose-leaf lips of yours should be made no less for the madness of music and song than for the madness of kissing. Your slim gilt soul walks between passion and poetry. I know Hyacinthus, whom Apollo loved so madly, was you in Greek days.

Why are you alone in London, and when do you go to Salisbury? Do go there to cool your hands in the grey twilight of Gothic things, and come here whenever you like. It is a lovely place and lacks only you; but go to Salisbury first.

Always, with undying love, yours,
Oscar

—  Oscar Wilde to Lord Alred “Bosie” Douglas (Wilde’s eventual muse)

phanicatthegaydisco  asked:

The fuck is up with this? Why do you get so many homophobia/ transphobia, why do these people think they right for reason, "my poor straight soul can't take the HUGE amount or 'hate' i got from this one person because they (rightfully lol) generalized my sexuality to point a whole other problem, how would you feel if THAT HAPPENED TO YOU, cause obviously you never lived that before and it completely the same thing because obviously 'heterophobia' causes people mental illneses and abuse RIGHT??"

Because the straights are so oppressed when a gay/trans person says they’re uncomfortable with them.

anonymous asked:

In your opinion, why do spells and witchcraft work? Is it just the belief part or are there other reasons?

I’m glad I get to answer this now because the answer I would have given when I first got this would have been shitty, but now that I’ve received my first reiki treatment and some advice from the reiki master who worked on me (shout out to Thema’s Holistic Soul Energy business, Black witches doing big things okayyyee <3 <3 <3) , I can answer wholly.

I believe that the foundation of a spell is the energy you put into it when you cast it. The ingredients for the spell, the physical attributes, only help manifest and focus the spell. Without the foundation of your spiritual self, the energy inside you, everything falls apart and either doesn’t work at all or backfires. I’ve had this happen a lot, and Thema (the reiki master) helped me realize that the energy within myself (my chakras, most likely) are imbalanced and are causing my spells to go haywire.

Remember this:

As above, so below.

As within, so without.

As the universe, so the soul.

(( @eroshiyda commissioned my six souls! i took a while to get started and they paid me a bazillion dollars so i decided to make sure they got their money’s worth ehehe

perseverance is in a “draw me like one of your french girls” pose because they are very easily convinced to do things and patience takes full advantage of this also i couldn’t figure out what to do with them after i’d drawn the Scream Team and my friend suggested it

if you like my art why don’t you give me a commission and help me pay for cool leg!))

Otherkin logic.

Otherkin: “you can’t make assumptions on the whole based on a few!!”

Otherkin: assumes anyone who doesn’t agree with them is a white cis gendered male

Otherkin: oh my gosh why do anti kin hate on us?? ://// we do nothing at all that bothers you or harms you in anyway oh my gosh leave us alone :////

Otherkin: tells anyone who doesn’t agree with them to die or to kill themselves

Otherkin: ugh it’s a spiritual thing you don’t understand

Otherkin: hEy GUIs thiS R me kiNzzz.
I iDentify As thaT An Animla bodie Nd SoUl. aLso Any FiktiOnal Karakter WHo iS REmotLey PooPulaR ;^P

Otherkin: it’s a coping skill some people use. They’re trying their hardest to cope with serious mental illnesses.

Otherkin: I PRETEND IM A DOG TO COPE WITH A MENTAL ILLNESS THAT IS SUPER SERIOUS. I KNOW THIS CUZ THE INTERNETS TOLD ME SOOOOOO.

Otherkin: ugh. Tumblr is my safe space don’t invade with your hurtful comments ://///

Otherkin: *posts shit about their feelings on a PUBLIC FORUM*

Otherkin: whatever. We’re entitled to our opinions and beliefs.

Otherkin: YOU DONT AGREE THAT IM AN ANGEL??? WHAT GIVES YOU THE RIGHT TO HAVE INDEPENDENT THOUGHTS AND OPINIONS ON A SUBJECT OH MY GOD CHECK YOUR PRIVILEGE ABLIEST CIS SCUM.

Dear Arab parents

Stop publicly mocking, shaming and humiliating ur children over dumb shit.

Stop forcing them to do things that they don’t like because everyone else is doing that thing.

Stop comparing your children to other people and then saying to them “what’s the matter with you why can’t you be like him what are you missing?”

It’s one of the most soul crushing and demeaning thing you can do.

Your child is not a robot that’s missing a part. They are human beings and every human being is different than the next.

Disclaimer: this is from personal experience. not just what I see from my own parents but from my Arab friends parents since I was a child and still continue to see with children today in my Arab neighborhood community.

anonymous asked:

I'm constantly struggling against fear and doubt. Why? I try to put every ounce of trust in God and then I get so scared I just cry. I'm afraid of God so much, I'm afraid he can do bad things, he can destroy our minds bodies and soul. He can put me in hell if I'm not careful and I'm so afraid of that I'm always paranoid. I can't imagine Jesus calling my name anymore and it's just terrifying. Do you think God doesn't want me anymore? You can be honest..

Listen, I’ve been in the exact same place you’ve been. When I first became a Christian, I thought that it was up to me to please Him. I thought I had to perform and act a certain way in order for Him to love me. 

But as someone that’s come out the other side of that let me tell you something, Jesus loves you. He adores you. He absolutely wants you more than anything. And I’m not just saying that, I know it. 

Jesus laid down His life for you. He gave up Himself for you. He was nailed to a cross because of the love that He has for you, so that He could be with you. He’s not going to let you go after something like that. He loves you so so so so so much. Please trust me on this - if theres one thing that I am certain of, its that Jesus loves you, and He wants you more than anything.

Don’t think of Him as some scary man up in the sky that we cannot reach. He’s is inside you, walking next to you, picking you up when you fall, sitting next to you in the cinema, patting your back to help you fall asleep at night, keenly listening in on every word you say and talking back hoping that you might hear Him. He is pursuing you in everything. Please believe me! 

God wants anything but to send you to hell, thats the very reason He sent Jesus, so that we don’t have to. 2 Corinthians 5:21 ″God made him who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God.” If you have accepted Jesus into your heart and declared that He is your Lord and Saviour, you are saved my dear. Nothing can come between that. Nothing you do, nothing satan tries to do, nothing the world says can stand in the way of you and heaven once Jesus has set you free. John 8:36 “So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed.” You are free!

This is a very long answer but I just want you to know, that God is not to be feared. He gave up His son that we might have relationship with Him. Jesus died that we might know Him. He wants to have relationship with you. He wants you to feel safe and secure in Him. He does not want to condemn you but to love you. You have been made clean by Jesus, the Father sees you as righteous now. Live in this freedom that Christ has given us. You are a child of God. Your Father reigns over the Earth and Heavens. 

John 1:12-13 “But as many as received Him, to them He gave the right to become children of God, even to those who believe in His name, who were born, not of blood nor of the will of the flesh nor of the will of man, but of God.”

He loves you, more than you know. 

XX - C

wocxdid  asked:

IC: Awwwww, isn't it sweet? You made a little friend for you, now you're gonna share cupcakes, giggles like little idiots for nothing, act as if you had a SOUL to give you compassion to make this "friendship" work and manyother things. You know, it's fine if you made a friend, as if I cared anyway, but do you truly think this will be a thing? And in this world isn't it kill or be killed? You're a huge hypocryte flowey, a coward and an hypocryte. I had some faith in ya damnit!

* Why do you think the friendship with him is impossible? Lack of soul isn’t a huge barrier when we experienced pretty much the same crap. He’d get me.

* …You know, you remind me of my past self a lot, even though you’re Asriel. What happened to your “Don’t kill and don’t be killed?” I think you’re the one hypocritical here. Funny, isn’t it?

* Now scram. I won’t allow you speak to me like this anymore.

You’re gonna say it’s because, technically, a child with a working brain stem can’t be declared brain dead even though he’ll never walk or talk or move or eat, even though he’s missing the parts of his brain that he needs to have a life. Not just be alive, but have a life. To love, to think, to know words and feelings, to be conscious. You’re gonna talk to me about medicine and technicalities and the failings of science. Yeah. But the thing is, that’s not why you won’t do the harvest. It’s because it’s unimaginable. What I’m asking you to do is unimaginable. It’s horrible. It’s excruciating. I’m asking you to help dismantle my baby for parts. And there’s no piece of anyone’s soul that can hold that and feel okay. But I’m asking. I’m asking you. I’m his mother. And I’m asking you to do this. And you want to know why? It’s because I did a little research, Sam. Science. In Chicago, there’s this baby girl, 6 weeks old, with pulmonary hypertension who needs new lungs. Outside Detroit there is a 10-day-old boy who was born blind, but could see if he had new corneas. I read this blog about this 14-month-old kid named Gideon in San Diego who’s been on a heart-lung machine for months because he needs one tiny valve in his heart. There’s burned babies who need skin. There’s infants who need livers, and toddlers who need kidneys, and there’s even this one 4-month-old girl named Lulu who needs a multiple-organ transplant. My baby could save all of those babies. He could be responsible for kids leaving the hospital and going home and growing up and falling in love and having sex and arguing with their boyfriends and making mistakes and living and maybe not ruining their lives with drugs. What I’m asking you to do is unimaginable. But it’s also everything those other mothers could ever imagine. I’m his mom. And I’m asking you to do this. If I can get there, why can’t you?
—  Amelia Shepherd, Private Practice 5x22
@kurisuumakise replied to your photoset “@lexinthymia tagged me for this aesthetic thing (thank you!! <3),…”

GLAD 2 SEE MY REACTION IMAGES ARE BEING PUT TO GOOD USE

YOUR REACTION IMAGES ARE THE LANGUAGE OF MY SOUL

@weepycat replied to your photoset “@lexinthymia tagged me for this aesthetic thing (thank you!! <3),…”

why do u have one of my selfies saved wtf

i am so sorry….i have no excuse…..AND NO REGRETS

Originally posted by dennsokagi

@eerna replied to your photoset “@lexinthymia tagged me for this aesthetic thing (thank you!! <3),…”

RELATABLE

I AM…HOW DO THE KIDS SAY….HIP..?


@themusicalbookworm replied to your post “˜† put this star into the inbox of your favourite blogs. it’s time to…”

flawless GIF usage

shrek gifs are the only true medium to accurately define our love,

jesstherebel  asked:

I'm assuming you do the ship in your asks but I ship you with 2 youtubers! I ship you with Shane Dawson and Phil Lester. Like them you are insanely awesome and well you're probably the most intelligent person I know. You're immensely passionate about everything you do and shit I admire that since I do nothing but procrastinate! Also you're such a smol bean and you need to be protected at all costs (If this was a show ship thing too Sam Winchester for you!)

i’m gonna cry omg :’) this is why you’re my favourite person in the world 

  • ship: dan howell duh 
  • best friend: jackspeticeye 
  • cuddle buddy: phil lester because come on you’s would be adorable 
  • cute gif of your ship:

Originally posted by shinyphan

  • random song: cold soul - trevor moran 

youtuber ships

Consideration - Rihanna ft. Sza

i came fluttering in from neverland
time can never stop me

no no no no
i know you’ve tried to
i came riding in on a pale white horse
handing out highs to less fortunate

i do advise you

run it back
run it on back

when you breaking it down for me
cause i can’t hear you
2 times

run it on back

will it ever make sense to me

i got to do things my own way darling
will you ever let me

will you ever respect me – no
do things my own way darling
you should just let me

why u aint never let me grow

when i look outside my window i can’t get no piece
of mind

when i

look outside my window i can’t get no peace of mind
oh oh oh

let me cover your shit in glitter i could make it gold
gold

heard you tryna sell ya soul baby

word on the street you run it low lately

i needed you to please give my reflection
a break from the face its seeing now

oo darling? gahhlee

would you mind giving my reflection a break
from the pain its feeling now

i got to do things my own way darling
you should just let me

will you ever respect me – no
do things my own way darling
you should just let me
why u aint never let me grow

when i look outside my window i can’t get no piece
of mind

when i

look outside my window i can’t get no peace of mind
oh oh oh

get no piece
get no peace
get-ta-get no peace

Self-Sabotage...

I wanted to…
To like you
To trust you
To believe that you could care about me, that you’d be there if I needed you.
I wanted to…
But mama couldn’t do it
Papa ain’t care
Brother didn’t try
If mother and father could forsake me, why wouldn’t you.
I wanted to…
Open my heart to you
Show you the darkest depths of my soul
The places where my demons hide
The places where I weep inside
I was scared to…
Everyone else walked
Everything I lost
So many things I can’t do
Cus’ see my burdens not easy and I’m not asking you to bare ‘em
Maybe you would’ve volunteered, but I know after a while it would’ve became too much and you would’ve wanted out… cus’ you ain’t sign up for this… cus’ I ain’t sign up for this.
I was afraid…
I let you invade my fragile being
Filling my ears with sweet everything’s that meant absolutely nothing… leaving a bitter taste in my mouth and an ache in my head.
I was protecting you…
For me you’d be settling
Having never known love, I’m incapable of giving it, both to you and myself
I’m broken
Unfair of me to allow you to carry this weight with me
I know you’re thinking…
“She’s worth it”
“I’m willing”
But you’re looking at it through rose colored lenses, vision obscured by inaccurate filters and useless fillers… emotion outweighing logic, you’re not thinking straight.
Might be worth the weight, but you shouldn’t have to.
Wait.
I wanted to…
But I didn’t for you…
















At least that’s the story I’ll tell myself and anyone who ask.