why do i stan him again

Q&A Transcript with Alex Hirsch at MomoCon 2017

Question: Before you decided to make Bill the main bad guy, did you have another character in mind that would have been the villain? 

Alex: Yeah, um that’s a good question. Uh, so, when we came up with the villain of the show, I knew that… I knew that Bill was involved. And I knew that Ford had disappeared due to some deal gone wrong with some villain next to the mystery of how Gravity Falls was all assembled. 

Um, but, I didn’t yet decide that Bill was that character in the very beginning, y'know? I had always imagined it was some sort of evil character somewhere kinda hidden in the woods. I wasn’t sure I could go with the Bill idea cuz I thought it would be too much like Twin Peaks, but as we got further along the series we discussed it among the repairs and we were like, ‘none of our other villain ideas were as good.’ Bill, Bill was weirder than anything else we thought of. Um, I remember there were other ideas. Strange monsters and government officials; some kind of cthulhu– some weird crazy old man. But nothing was ever better than Bill, so it ended up sticking. Probably somewhere around, y'know, season one– midway through season one, we started thinking we might be– might be on point.

Q: Was Grunkle Stan ever aware of McGucket’s connection to his brother? 

 A: Oh, oh that’s such a good question. Wait, let me think about that for a second… Uh… lemme see… I don’t think so. I don’t think Stan was ever aware of McGucket’s connection to his brother. Because, by the time Stan traded identities with Ford, uh… McGucket had already gone off the deep end– Was already y'know, had already created the Society of the Blind Eye; had already lost his own memory. So Stan would’ve really only known McGucket as a local obnoxious fisherman. 

And McGucket, probably somewhere deep in the back of his mind, was eerily just drawn to Stan in a way he just couldn’t put his finger on, because he thought maybe he knew him, but– I don’t– I think Stan was ignorant of that. Um, I think Stan… I think Stan looking through the journals probably should’ve put two and two together, but Stan’s not the best at book-learnin’. Uh, so… my guess is Stan wouldn’t have known despite that uh, that there’s a lot of tumblr art out there showing them as like the Scooby-Doo gang. I don’t think Stan ever really knew McGucket before.

Q: What episode do you believe came out the strongest and the most well rounded overall? And is it the same as your personal favorite episode?

 A: Oh gosh. Um. That’s a great question. Hmm… I probably feel, personally, that the strongest episode is uh, “Not What He Seems” just because it’s such a dramatic episode. Like, we know– We’ve never had an episode that dramatic. But, when we first pitched it to Disney executives… they thought it was bad. [laughs] Um, Because it didn’t have a lot of jokes in it? Like, I remember normally when we’re pitching our episode, executives can usually gauge how good they are by how much people laugh. People didn’t really laugh for that one, because it’s really tense. So we thought, maybe we’d screwed up. But, when the animation came back we were like, 'Oh! It’s GOOD that it’s tense. Like, it worked!’ Um, So, I dunno if that’s my favorite episode, but I think– that’s the episode we should’ve won an Emmy for, and I’m still pissed we didn’t. [laughs]

In terms of favorite episode, like… I dunno. I think the first episode that I really felt that the show was really starting to feel the way I wanted it to– “Time Traveler’s Pig” in season one. Like, that was an episode where Dipper had an interesting story, and Mabel had an interesting story, and uh, felt nostalgic, and based around the summer, and had a big secret callback to even previous episodes, so– I just remember when we first just got that episode back in color, I was like, 'hey I think maybe I like how I’m making this cartoon show,’ so I think that has a particularly fond place in my heart, y'know.

Q: Is Disney bringing you to SDCC or NYCC later this year to promote the journal and other books coming out? 

 A: Right, um, yeah, Disney– Disney… Disney-general and me, have like– we’re divorced. Like, they kept the house, and the pets. Y'know what I mean? It’s… we don’t like get dinner or anything. But, the Disney Publishing department, separate from Disney Television, they’re really cool, and enthusiastic, and energized. And they wanna make new cool stuff. Um, so I think it’s possible I might be at D23 this year, and it’s possible I might be at Comic Con, but I don’t have anything confirmed yet.

Q: In the scene where Bill is trying to convince Ford to join him in the Fearamid, were there any other jokes or story beats that were considered? 

 A: Which episode specifically are you talking about? [Q: The We’ll Meet Again scene.] Yea yea yea, We had a– Every scene that you’ve ever seen in the show has a ton of ton of stuff we’ve thought of and had to cut for time or other reasons. Um, I remember there was definitely a version of that where Bill was a lot trickier. Like, he sort of more successfully lied to Ford about like: 'We’re actually going to make the world a better place. Though I present myself as this chaos lunatic that’s just my personality.' Like, 'here’s ways in which we’ll IMPROVE the universe.' 

Um, but it felt out of character. We thought it was much more like Bill to just draw smiley faces in oceans and eat the sun and just– hope, that the force of his charisma could convince Ford that that was a good idea. But uh, I feel like– I feel like Bill can be really really tricky when he wants to, but by the time Weirdmageddon showed up he’s so impatient, and he’s so convinced that he won, that he was no longer like, this brilliant chess master he used to be. He’s like, 'alright let’s do it! Do what I want or I’ll eat your face.’ Like, no more– No more, like– He wasn’t as smart a tactician as he used to be, y'know?

Q: Was “We’ll Meet Again” always the song you were going to use? 

A: Oh yeah, it had to be that. It was like… I think I’d just seen Dr. Strangelove recently around that time and it stuck in my head. It seems to me, if Bill has a taste in music, it would be, like, old timey music that ranges from either weird to obnoxious to obscure. 

Uh, Disney wanted me to cut it cuz it cost them a bunch of money to get the rights, even though it’s so old, it still cost them money to get the rights. And I just… said, please. Over and over and over again. I would send an e-mail that just said, 'please.’ And send another e-mail that said, 'please.’ And I would send another e-mail that said– Yeah. [laughs] Eventually I wore them down that they’re like, 'alright we’ll spend thousands of dollars.’ [laughs]

Q: Are real comics coming? 

 A: You want comics? Would you read Gravity Falls comics?
[Audience screams]
[Alex leans his ear forward]

A: It’s a terrifying noise isn’t it, Michael? I was at a… Gravity Falls gallery, and like, they didn’t tell us how many people would show up, and it was like, THAT noise echoing from every corner. And uh like, I think I lost a year of my life. My hair started going gray, and it was like, 'oh my god, this is too much love! It’s terrifying.' 

Comics. I would love to do Gravity Falls comics. Um, I have so many… One of the tough things about a half hour show like Gravity Falls is every now and then we think of an idea that we really liked, but it was too short for a half hour; 'oh that’s only five minutes of story’– Or it’s too specific and weird. And so I have tons and tons of ideas of the show that y'know we’d like to explore this character, we’d like to show this secret, this storyline. So, I’d love to do comics. But, that’s up to Disney Publishing, and I’m trying to convince them. So, hopefully, I’ll have something exciting to announce in not too long.

Q&A with Stan and Soos

Q: Is Dipper adorable or manly?  

Stan: Dipper smells like baby wipes. Even if I cut off all my shoulder hair, and taped it to him, he wouldn’t be 1/10th as manly I am.

Q: What would you do if Mabel told you she had a date to prom? 

Stan: I would… invite the gentleman over, have some coffee, tie him to a chair and interrogate him for 10 hours, and maybe throw him in the pit. [shrug] Hands off my neice, kid!

Q: What would happen if Soos met Giffany again? 

Soos: Oh yea, I recently downloaded this couple’s therapy sim? Uh, I think she and I would have to talk about our issues and pass around a conversation pillow, and really work out these struggles. Cuz she’s got some problems, dude.

Q: Soos, why are you so perfect? 

Soos: Yeah, uh, my grandma said that a whole bunch of doves flew down and formed the shape of a perfect angel over my crib. I dunno, dude I guess I was just born that way.

little tattoos part iii


this is part three of my reddie soulmate fic

read part one here and two here

thank you guys so much for all the love on this fic. Please read my notes on the bottom as they are important! ty!

summary: a soulmate au where everyone has a tattoo exactly like their soulmate

pairing: eddie and richie

words:  2233

Eddie woke up even more exhausted than he was when he fell asleep. He let a breath out of his mouth and took in a long one through his nose. He kept his eyes shut. He wasn’t ready to face the world yet.

Everything he loved was gone, he suddenly realized. This thought jolted him awake, causing him to sit straight up in a panic. It hadn’t occurred to him that he lost everything yesterday. All of his friends were bound to know. They all hung out together. They were the Loser’s Club and Eddie had ruined that. They could never all hang out anymore as Eddie couldn’t bear to be in the same room as Richie, let alone even think about him. He started to really panic, then.

His breathing was rapid and shallow and his hands were shaking violently. Eddie got up, stumbling, trying to find his damned inhaler. It wasn’t in his pocket, nor his backpack, or on his desk. He couldn’t breathe. At this point, he didn’t know if it was even an asthma attack anymore, or if it was one in the first place. It was so much worse. His head was spinning and he couldn’t see anymore. It was in his jacket, he remembered suddenly.

Eddie collapsed on the ground, catching himself with his hands as he tried to steady his breathing, but nothing was working. His heart was racing and he couldn’t stop shaking. Eddie was sobbing uncontrollably, his vision blurred from the tears. He didn’t know what was happening. His lungs felt constricted and he couldn’t get any air in. He was hyperventilating, trying to breathe but couldn’t. He tried to move towards his jacket that was hanging on the back of his chair. He was shaking so badly that he could barely move. His hand grasped the chair, pulling it and knocking it over. The light blue inhaler fell out of the pocket of his coat, landing a couple inches away from him. He grabbed it, instantly feeling as if he could breathe again when he took his first two puffs of medicine.

An hour passed before Eddie could stand again. HIs legs were shaky but he managed to get to his bathroom. He found it odd that his mother hadn’t come to get him yet until he realized that it was four in the morning. Eddie knew he couldn’t go to school, but he couldn’t stay home ‘sick’ as his mother would take him to the hospital. He washed his face with some water and laid back down and attempted to fall asleep.

His mother woke him up at 7 am and tried to get him to take his pills as she did every morning. He walked out of the house and rode his bike to park. Eddie read there all day. He needed to take a breather and reading was his escape. The cool breeze against his skin calmed him even more as he closed his eyes and rested his head against the tree he was sitting up against. It was odd to feel so peaceful. At three o'clock, he headed home as if he had gone to school.

“Eddie bear, how was school?” She asked from her chair in the living room.

“Fine.” He responded quietly, heading upstairs and into his room.

Eddie felt bad about lying, not going to school, but he knew he couldn’t face Richie, Bill, or anyone for that matter. He checked his cut from the previous day, and it was still healing properly. That was one less thing for him to worry about. Eddie laid back on his bed, sighing. Could his life get any worse?

“W-W-What did you d-do?” Bill demanded, slamming his Chemistry book down on the loser’s lunch table. He was beyond pissed.

   Richie looked up at Bill through his coke bottle lenses. Stan was pissed too, standing behind him with crossed arms and narrowed eyes. “I didn’t do anything!” He defended, pushing his glasses further up on his nose. “I-”

   “Where is Eddie?” Stan interjected, sliding into the seat across from Richie. “He isn’t here today and he was supposed to tell you how he felt yesterday. What the hell did you do to him, Richie?”

   Richie scoffed. “So that’s why he was avoiding me.”

   Bill looked at him confused. “W-What do you mean av-av-avoiding you?”

   Richie rolled his eyes. “You know when someone doesn’t talk to you and walks different routes in the hallways so they don’t see you. Gee, Bill, I thought you were smart.” He replied sarcastically, sticking his plastic fork into eerily yellow mashed potatoes.

   Stan leaned forward on his elbows. “So, if he avoided you, why isn’t he here?”

   Richie let out an exasperated sigh, leaning backward in his chair. “He told me in the gym locker room, alright?”

   Bill sat down next to Stan, looking at Richie to egg him on.

   Richie sighed again. “And I was too shocked to do anything and he ran out crying.”


   “Hey! I tried to go to his house and apologize and he slammed the window shut. He wouldn’t listen to me.” Richie grumbled. “I really tried! But I have a plan.”

   Stan and Bill exchanged glances. Bill nodded a little and Stan sighed. “What’s your plan?”

   Richie sat up straight. “You two need to convince him to come over. Say it’s everyone but me.”

   Bill frowned. “H-He’s not gonna b-b-believe us, Rich.”

   “Make him believe you! I need to talk to him. I need to explain.” Richie protested, running a hand through his hair.

   Bill nodded. “I’ll t-try.”

   Richie looked at Stan, who was staring down at the table. “Stan?”

   “I’m not gonna help you if all you’re gonna do is break his heart. He doesn’t deserve that, Richie.” He deadpanned.

   Richie was offended and a look of hurt flashed across his face before he composed himself. “I am not going to hurt Eddie!”

   “Sure, telling him you only wanna be his friend isn’t gonna hurt him.”

   “This is the one time I’m not being a sarcastic dipshit, Stanley! Are you listening? I said I’m not going to hurt him. I would never hurt him. I love him!” Richie slammed his fist on the table, causing a few kids to look over at them. “Did you hear that?”

   Stan nodded.

   “At least they didn’t cut off your ears like they cut off your dick.” Richie spat, getting up and walking away. The bell rang moments later. Bill grabbed his bookbag and stood up, gently nudging Stan to do the same. Richie was standing near his locker, attempting to open it but getting the combination wrong.


   “What, Stanley? What the hell do you want?” Richie practically growled, turning and glaring at Stan. If looks could kill, he would be dead ten times over.

   “I’ll help.”

   Richie’s hard stare softened a little. “Thanks. I’m sorry I got mad but you gotta admit that line was good.” A small smile crept onto his face, and even Stan chuckled a bit.

   Bill was assigned the job to get Eddie over, and Stan was to get everyone else in on the plan. He walked up to Eddie’s door and knocked. There was shuffling and a shout of “I got it” from Eddie. He opened the door and saw Bill, his face paled a little.

   “H-Hi,” Bill said quietly. “C-Could we talk?”

   Eddie glanced behind him for a moment to see if his mom had fallen back asleep or not before nodding and stepping outside, shutting the door behind him. “What do you wanna talk about because I’m not gonna talk about him.” He put emphasis on the word him. He sounded angry, disgusted, even. He laced his fingers together, still a bit shaky from his panic attack this morning.

   “N-No. The group w-wants you to come over. Minus R-R-Richie.”

   “Oh, no. I am not falling for that. He’s gonna be there when I get there and I don’t want to talk to him.”

   Bill shook his head. “Please? I-I-It’s movie night. You can p-pick.”

   Eddie glared at the ground, trying to work the request over in his head. He finally let out a long sigh and nodded. “Fine.”

   They rode their bikes to Bill’s house in silence, neither of them knowing what to say, so they said nothing. Eddie set his bike up against the house as he always did, following Bill inside. Georgie greeted the both of them with a hello and a smile.

   “H-Head to the living room, I-I-I’ll get the snacks,” Bill said, heading to the kitchen. Eddie nodded, walking towards the living room. He walked in, glancing around the room at the various decorations on the wall. Paintings and pictures of their family were scattered around the room. It felt homey.

   Eddie was jolted out of his thoughts when he heard the door shut. He turned his head to look, only to find Richie standing there. His breath hitched in his throat and he knew he had paled. It wasn’t even five seconds before he started to get angry. He knew this was a set-up.

   “I fucking knew it,” Eddie grumbled.

   “Eddie-” Richie started, but Eddie had had enough.

   “No, Richie. I don’t want to hear it. I’m really not in the mood to listen to you tell me you don’t feel the same way and that you hope we can be friends. Because we can’t be friends, Richie! I don’t want to be your friend. I can’t be your damn friend.

   Richie Tozier was silenced by Eddie for the second time that week. It was a new record. He composed himself before stepping forward. “If you let me show you something, I promise I will leave you alone.”

   Eddie was shocked that Richie was being serious. He was never serious in all the time he’s known the guy. He was always cracking inappropriate jokes at the wrong time. Despite all of his instinct to say no, Eddie nodded.

   Richie let out a sigh of relief before spitting onto his hand.

   “That is disgusting! What the hell are you-” Eddie cut himself off as he watched Richie take his spit and use it to smudge his soulmate tattoo off his skin. It wasn’t real. This whole time, Eddie thought that Richie had a soulmate. It was fake.

   Richie watched Eddie for a moment before deciding to explain himself. “My mom used to tell me I would be made fun of for not having a soulmate. That I wouldn’t fit in. So, one night I decided to draw one on every morning so I would fit in. It sounds shitty and kind of is but- Eds are you listening?”

   Eddie walked forward and grabbed Richie’s hand. He was holding back the urge to cringe, as Richie’s saliva was now on his hand. Richie didn’t understand what Eddie was doing. He let him move his finger until it was placed right next to the corresponding one on Eddie’s hand. Under Richie’s tattoo that he drew on, was a small, circular and blotchy birthmark. It was identical to Eddie’s.

   “What the fuck,” Eddie announced. A smile spread across Richie’s face while Eddie started to ramble. “What does this mean? Are these soulmate tattoos? They look like birthmarks! Why the hell would this be a soul-”

   Richie grabbed his face in his hands, leaning in and pressing his chapped lips onto Eddie’s soft ones. Eddie was stiff for a moment before he melted into the kiss and started to do the same that Richie was. Eddie was unsure where to put his hands or what to even do. Before he could react, Richie pulled away, slowly opening his eyes to find Eddie completely red.

   “I love you too, Eds.”

   Eddie had a content smile on his face. “Don’t call me that, Trashmouth.”

   “Ah, Trashmouth, what a nickname. You really know how to charm the boys.” Richie sassed, throwing his arm over Eddie’s shoulder. “Shall we tell the rest of the losers that Bill and Stan have competition?”

   Eddie and Richie showed the rest of the group their tattoos. Stan had this smug look of “I told you so” written across his face and so did Bill. They ended up watching a rom-com, much to Eddie’s dismay. Richie kept his arm around the smaller boy the whole night, pressing chaste kisses to his forehead every once and awhile.

   Richie and Eddie rode back to their houses together that night. They arrived at Eddie’s house first, both of them silent.

   “Gee, you could cut this sexual tension with a knife.” Richie joked, leaning forward on the handlebars of his bike.

   Eddie rolled his eyes, using his kickstand to stand his bike up next to his porch as he always did. Richie hopped off his bike, letting it lay on the ground. He walked up to Eddie, pinching his cheek. “So, Eddie Spaghetti, where do you wanna go on our first date of being fuckbuddies?”

   “You ruined it.” Eddie sighed, slapping his hand away.

   “I didn’t ruin anything!” Richie retorted, smiling. “I made it better.”

   “Okay, Tozier,” Eddie said, leaning forward and kissing Richie briefly.

   Richie had a smile plastered on his face. “Goodnight, Eds.”

   “Goodnight, Trashmouth,” Eddie said before he shut the door. He quietly snuck up the stairs. His mom was still asleep in her chair. He fell back on his bed, a content smile on his face.

   Eddie Kaspbrak was happy.


this ending is ending a. i wrote two endings because i couldnt decide which i liked better

so ending b will be posted after part four as a bonus lil chapter thingy

you can decide whichever you prefer to be canon as i love them both

also im really self concious about this part so please give me your honest feedback ilysm

let me know if you want an epilouge! i would be down to write it


talk to me/request to be on tag list

tysm for reading

Keep reading

The losers at a party

- Mike gets invited to a party because he’s super popular in high school and he invites the other losers to tag along. (we all know he wouldn’t go if they didn’t). 

- Stan and Eddie tries to come up with excuses on why they can’t go but when Richie asks Eddie again, sticking out his lower lip and doing puppydog eyes Eddie can’t say no. 

- “Eddie I thought we were in this together!”. 

- “I know, I’m sorry Stan but he did that thing with his lip”. 

- “You’re so weak”. 

- Stan ends up going to because the other losers doesn’t really give him a choice. 

- Ben only goes because Beverly says she’ll dance with him to NKOTB.

- Bill is so social? Like who is that person he’s talking to?

- Richie doesn’t drink because he’s the only one with a license and he promised to stay sober so that he could drive if one of the others got sick and needed to get home. 

- He has so much fun anyways. 

- Bev gets high with some older girls who thinks she’s super cool. Ben stays by her side the whole time, making sure she doesn’t get into trouble. 

- Stan rules beer pong with Mike and they keep winning. They both get kinda tipsy and very giggly. 

- Eddie gets super drunk. 

- He’s all over the place singing and trying to get Richie to dance with him. 

- “Richie please, you like this song!”

- “Eddie when have you ever heard me listen to girls just wanna have fun?”

- Richie ends up dancing with Eddie anyway because he do like the song.

 - Bev pulls Ben to the dancefloor when NKOTB comes on. 

- Ben is insecure at first but Beverly’s smile makes him forget the world and they dance to the next five songs as well. 

- Mike ends up talking to a lot of girls that night. When the other losers asks him about it he simply says “A gentleman doesn’t kiss and tell lads”. 

- Stan and Bill ends up making out in one of the bathrooms. 

- When they leave they’re out of breath and their hair is messed up but they have the widest smiles on their faces. 

- As predicted Richie needs to drive Eddie home. 

- They stop at mcdonald’s to get icecream on the way. 

- Eddie falls asleep in the booth and Richie almost draws a dick on his forhead. But he stops himself and carries him to the car. 

- Richie sleeps over at Eddie’s house that night. They wake up in eachother’s arms and Richie teases Eddie a lot about the whole girls just wanna have fun incident. 

- “You’re such a liar trashmouth there’s no way I sang that whole song”. 

- “Oh but you did Eddie Spaghetti”. 

- They go to a lot of parties together after that. 

Tony: [On phone] No, no, no, it’s not you, it’s just… well, you know, these things run their course and… well, you, you have to accept that…

Bucky: Personal call, Stark?

Tony: Yes. Go away.

Bucky: Somebody being dumped?

 Tony: [Covers mouthpiece] How do you tell someone you don’t want to see them?

Bucky: Easy.

[Takes phone]

Bucky: Listen, Dirtbag, this is Tony’s husband. I have your phone number now. I can find your address. If you ever try to contact him again, I will reach down your throat, grab your intestines, rip them out and drive over your head. Lose this number or lose your life.

[Hangs up]

Bucky: You’re welcome.

Tony: That was my aunt, Angie Martinelli. Aunt Peggy’s best friend. She was trying to end her relationship with her boyfriend at her retirement center.

Bucky: Why didn’t you stop me?

Tony: Too stunned.

Bucky: Where do I send flowers?

Tony: If you ever try to talk to her again, she will fly up here and kill you.

Morning Sickness - Bucky Barnes x Pregnant!Reader - (REQUEST)

Originally posted by thesunthemoontheflare

Summary: In which (Y/N) is pregnant and doesn’t know what to do.
23: We’ll get through this. I promise.
42: I’m Pregnant.

REQUESTED BY: ANON (thank you!!)

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Pregnant!Reader

Warning: Stressed out (Y/N) )::::

Word count: 1.5k

[[ Check Out My Masterlist ]]

A/N: Requests are open and I absolutely am open to anything! I love speaking to you guys and receiving any type of feed back so please don’t hesitate to send an ask or message (:
With that being said, I never close request so if you do happen to send a message, please be patient! It could take a day or a month! Thank you.

Keep reading

Made of Skin and Bones

(not my gifs!)

Pairing: Alpha!Bucky x Omega!Reader

Warnings: Language, A/B/O dynamics, make out

Summary: Due to the premature death of the King of your clan, his son, the alpha James Barnes, must assume his destiny and lead his people. As the tradition commands, he must choose some worthy omegas to make their his wives and with which he will ensure the subsistence of your clan. All the omega women are obliged to appear before their king, including you. Luckily for you, you would never be chosen… right?

Tags: at the end. ARE NOW CLOSED (sorry guys) I wrote them again one by one I really hope this time they work

A/N: So sorry guys for the delay, here I’m again! :)

9. Shore

Arrows whilst around your heads making you wince and yell every time you hear them nail in some surface. James is dragging you running through the trees, zigzagging and dodging the sharp arrows with difficulty. Your lungs hurt from the effort and the panic.

Suddenly James pushes you under a great hollowed root and covers your mouth with one hand. It is difficult to keep silence because of your laborious breathing and he presses your head against his chest trying to quell the little noises coming out of your mouth. You’re sure your heart is about to explode and you want to cry, who the hell is trying to kill you?

- Shhh - he tries to calm you down 

Keep reading

Modern Richie loves his memes (Headcanons kinda)

Okay so, I start using phrases like ‘fam’ and 'asuh’ and memes like 'damn Daniel’ and 'yeet’ ironically but then they accidentally become part of my everyday vocabulary

I feel like Richie would totally do this as well in a modern AU:

- I can imagine him walking to the rest of the losers like 'asuh fam-a-lam’

- Eddies name in his photo is 100% 'Eddie KaspBAE’ with some stupid emojis

- he’d sing all the meme songs, like welcome to my mine and it’s everyday bro

- Bev would hand him an empty packet of cigarettes once and he would throw it off the cliff at the Barrens yelling 'Yeet’

- Eddie would jokingly offend him and richie would just say 'I thought you were bae, turns out you’re just fam’

- 'Why do you smoke so much’ 'Yolo’

- He’d buy a fidget spinner with LED lights and start a one man rave at their sleepovers

- He’d definitely be into dabbing

- 'Damn Eddie, back at it again with the double fanny packs’

- Omg he’d know the big shaq mans not hot rap off by heart

- He’s really into memes (so is Stan but only the really savage and stupid ones)

(If you guys know a youtuber called smi77y then that’s who Richie would be like)

Add more if you can think of more memes that Richie would be on board with ironically

This Was Not The Plan

“Request: “Could you do one where the reader’s biggest fear is falling in love so that’s what Pennywise portrays himself to her as but he ends up actually falling in love with her?”

Pairing: Pennywise x Reader and slight Stan Uris x Reader

Warnings: None

Ever since you were little you had a massive crush on Stan Uris. It all started out in preschool when a couple of shitty boys in your class started picking on you. That’s when Stan decided to stand up for you and when he did all the boys ran away leaving you both alone. You and Stan introduced yourselves and a beautiful friendship emerged. 

You and Stan have been going strong ever since then. Your parents swore it was like you both had been separated at birth. It got so serious that both of your parents made sure they had given birth to their own kid which thankfully they had. 

Although by the 9th grade Stan still had not asked you out so you went out with your ex boyfriend who you then broke up with after just 3 months of dating because you were unhappy. He didn’t treat you right, he always put his friends first and it was basically a toxic relationship that you didn’t want to be apart of so you decided enough was enough.

You were happy now. Stan and the rest of your friends Bill, Eddie, Richie, Bev, Mike and Ben all helped you cope with your breakup. It was summer now so you would be hanging out with them all the time. You were definitely much happier now than you ever were with your ex. 

“So Y/N are you ready for me to tell you what I found out?” Bev asked.

You both were currently in a diner you were munching on some cheese fries while Bev ate her burger.

“Of course, spill.” You stated as you pointed your fork at her.

“Stan likes you.”

You choked on your fry covered in cheese before swallowing it whole. 

“What?” You asked in shock.

“Yes Y/N Stan likes you!!” Bev exclaimed.

“No way but how? Why?” You asked once again. It was way too good to be true.

“I asked him and he tried to deny it but he’s a horrible liar so I swore I wouldn’t tell him but I’m a great liar so here we are! And Y/N you’re gorgeous why wouldn’t be like you?!” Bev smiled as she finished babbling.

“Bev this is amazing holy shit thank you so much!” You said as you gave her a huge while smiling widely.

“No need to thank me it’s what I do.” She said pretending to dust off her shoulders.

You were back at your house, home alone because your parents were working. At first you were incredibly happy when Bev told you that Stan likes you but then you started overthinking. UGH. Thoughts swarmed your head as you thought out loud while pacing around your bedroom.

 “What if he ends up being like my ex?”

“No Stan isn’t like that he’s too good to be like that.”

“What if things don’t work out?”

“Oh god please let things work out.”

You threw yourself on your bed burying your face into your pillow trying to calm yourself down. 

“Oh you poor unfortunate soul so afraid to love now are we?”

You jumped out of your bed only to be met with a clown, a clown that you knew way too well. Pennywise. You backed up against your wall. wrong move. Pennywise now had you trapped in the corner with no way out. 

“Leave me alone go away!” You shouted as you slid down the wall.

“Why I’m just trying to love ya just like how Stanley Boy is.” Pennywise smirked as he put his hand on the back of your neck and pulled you closer.

You noticed with your two eyes as he smelled you opening his nose, inhaling your scent and then exhaling exaggeratedly.

“Ahh fear with a touch of vanilla, amber and raspberry perfume. Can’t say which one smells better your fear or the perfume.” Pennywise smirked as he whispered into your ear.

“I’d go with the perfume bucko.” 

You pushed Pennywise off and tried to make a run to your door but he tackled you. He pinned you to the ground while he held your arms preventing you from hitting him or doing anything.

“Aww is little Y/N so afraid to fall in love?” Pennywise taunted as his face hovered above you. 

“You don’t know anything let me go!” You shouted as you continued to struggle.

“I know more than you think beautiful. I’ll be back don’t miss me too much.” Pennywise said as he stroked your cheek and played with your hair.

In an instant he was gone. You sat up getting off of the ground, sobs escaped from your body. What the hell had just happened? Tears streamed down your face both of fear and of uncomfortableness. 

Pennywise was back in his lair under the well of the Neibolt House. 

Why did it feel so right? 

Why did it feel right when he backed you up against your wall? 

Why did it feel right when he pinned you to the ground? 

Why did he feel the need to stroke your cheek and play with your beautiful luscious locks as he looked into your captivating eyes?

What was happening to him?

Why was he suddenly feeling all of these new emotions and for a human? 

If you had been anyone else he would have killed you instantly but something inside of him had stopped him from doing that? 

What had it been?

That’s when Pennywise realized in horror, his eyes became the size of saucers.

“Is this what love feels like?!” He exclaimed in fear to no one in particular.

“Oh hell no this was not the plan.” 

Originally posted by gimmebuckysloveorelse

Originally posted by bigpointyears

You stared out of the window from your bed, laying under the sheets and watching as the sun rises. For a dismal day it was going to be sunny, apart of you wished it would rain for the weather to convey your emotions.

The pattering of paws pulled you from the window to the doorway. Mongo, your white German shepherd, stood with his tail wagging. You smiled as he slowly walked over to your side of the bed, you slowly petted his head. Fingers weaving in his soft but corse fur. You watched as he slowly and with difficulty jumped onto the bed. His joints were achy, stiff and in pain, yet he still insisted jumping on the bed and going for walks.

You watched as he slotted himself between you and Sebastian, his cold nose pressing against your bare forearm. You had gotten Mongo eleven years ago, you did everything together; eat at the same time, sleep at the same time, go for walks and even watch TV together. Yet, you have to continue without him.

“Hey, it’s okay,” Sebastian’s voice pulled you back to Earth. Your crying had woken him up, “we talked about this. He’s in pain and it’s for the best.”

You nodded watching as Sebastian scratched Mongo’s neck. “It still hurts.” He nods lightly, “when I got him, I didn’t think of this day. He’s my family, Seb. My best friend, my child, and now I got to carry on without him.” You cry wiping the tears with the comforter. “He’s been there through everything; every break up, when I got fired, when I got the job, he was there when I met you. How am I meant to start over? I’m not ready for this.” You cried harder gaining the attention of Mongo, who sat up and began licking at your hands that covered your face.

You spent most of the morning in Sebastian’s arms as you cried and hugging Mongo tightly.

On the way to the vets, Sebastian stops at Mongo favourite park, helping him out before leading you to your usual bench; the bench Sebastian tripped over Mongo and ultimately meeting you.

You watched as Mongo walked to the grass field, instead of running around and chasing squirrels or playing with the other dogs, he sat down. He watched the joggers jog past, he wagged his tail as kids got friendly or people walked past, he didn’t move from the spot in the middle of the field. You frowned as you looked at him, his slow demise would have been obvious to everyone, except you.

You felt like a bad owner for keeping him in pain. A few months ago he would have been chasing squirrels and joggers, playing with other dogs and playing fetch. Now he’s opting for watching instead of playing.

“I’ve been a good owner to him… haven’t I?” You turn to Sebastian, eyes wide and glassy, you looked so vulnerable and broken.

Seb nods. “The best. He loves you, I think more than I do, which would be impossible but not with him. You’ve done the best you could, he’s old, Y/N; medicines were just prolonging the inevitable.”

You both turn back to Mongo who is slowly walking back over to you. The sun shining on his white fur making him look heavenly, his pink tongue dangling out of his mouth. He gently rests his head on Sebs knee, a silent request to leave now.

You hold back any tears. “He’s ready.”

The car ride to the vets is silent. The waiting room is torture, you sit and watch other owners with their pets, knowing they’d be leaving with them. Sebastian lightly scratched behind Mongo’s left ear, smiling as Mongo places a paw on his knee and then the other, he hugs around Mongo’s neck lightly chuckling at the big oaf. He whispers something to Mongo, causing Mongo to let out a strained ‘woof’. Tina, your vet, calls you in and gives you a hug.

She tells you the procedure as Sebastian lifts Mongo onto the table, instantly laying down and resting his head on his paws, yawning as he did so. The explanation falls on deaf ears as you stroke Mongo, smiling as he wags his tail with little strength; almost as if he knows this is his last moments to do so.

“You’re a good boy, Mongo.” You kneel down, kissing his face and continue to remind him of that, even after he’s gone. Sebastian gently takes a hold of you, stroking your hair as Tina leaves you for a few minutes.

“Why aren’t you crying?” You cry into his chest, Sebastian sighs and smiles.

“Because I promised Mongo that I’d be strong for you, he doesn’t need me crying over him too, you’re feeling more than enough for the both of us.” Sebastian deals with the paper work for you, cremation papers and even offers to pick up his ashes tomorrow when they’ll be ready.

The drive home was silent except for your small sniffs and cries. You still wondered why Sebastian hadn’t cried, not that you expected him to but he adored Mongo, Mongo absolutely adored Sebastian back.


“Sebastian?” You frown as you walk into the bedroom that night. He’s sat on the floor, head in his hands and holding the red leash, he looks up and his eyes are glassy with tears and cheeks red. “Oh, Sebby.” You sit beside him, wrapping your arms around him.

“I accidentally filled up his dog dish,” he mutters between sobs into your neck. “He always comes to the sound of food, I was so confused.”

You hold him in silence, running your fingers through his hair. “He adored you, Sebastian. It’s okay to cry, I’m here, it’s okay.” You hold back your own, sitting in his lap now, trying to calm down your boyfriend.

Sebastian had finally calmed down enough to get into bed. “Sometimes, I think, he meant for me to trip over him. It sounds stupid but… I think, he knew or something. I’m gonna miss him,” he sighed gently.

“What did you say to Mongo?” You asked you laid side by side, facing one another, you were also both still crying and not wanting to sleep.

“Just guy things,” Sebastian shrugged and you chuckled. “I told him I loved him too. Realised I haven’t been saying it to him this past week, I was spending my time trying to be strong for you, I forgot to emote to him that I loved him. Didn’t want him to go without me saying that,” you started to cry again. “This is why I whispered it to him.” He chuckled, pulling you to him and kissing your forehead.

(Okay. I’m so sorry. I had to get this off of me, I’ve been a mess and crying all day. I had to put my nana dog down, Rhino (I know laugh. He’s an English Bulldog.), he was six and my mum tried to but she couldn’t. It was the worst experience ever. I never want to do that again. Again, I’m sorry.- Rosalie)


@christopherpowelllover asked for a new art piece with Chris and @gayforgayle suggested I draw my Mc and him a few weeks or months ago so that’s what I did and I’m so happy of the result!! If you hear screaming it’s me all the way from here also my back cause it’s dead since the third time I listened to can I have this dance

I love my cute dorks !! Chris is one of my favorite character to draw Mc not so much cause I always struggle to get her face right, it’s like Zig I never know how it’s gonna look HOWEVER PAINTING CHRIS’ HAIR IS TORTURE! I lost one brush that made it easier so I had to go the good ol’ way 😂 But hey it was worth it, I love my baby powell! 

Remember when they won and I said I was gonna draw them matching @kittenmusicals there! Omg 3 birds with one stone! Is that how you say it?? I’m LAME!

Anyway that’s enough rambling ! I hope the Chris’ stans get to enjoy the piece as much as I do! and boy I do ! 

The Animation quality has been butchered by tumblr once again sorry ! 


Request: “Hello! So I was wondering if you could do a Patrick hockstetter x reader where the reader has the biggest cruch on Patrick but he’s to oblivious to notice it and with the help of the losers club they make Patrick slowly realise that he has feelings for the reader to. Ps. I love your work”

Pairing: Patrick Hockstetter x Reader

“Seriously Y/N out of all the guys there are you decided to like Patrick Hockstetter?!” Richie asked in disbelief. 

He couldn’t believe that one of his closest friends liked a member of The Bowers Gang. Why couldn’t she have picked someone else? He thought. What Richie didn’t know was that you can’t force love.

“I didn’t make myself like him it just happened Rich. My heart goes bonkers whenever I see him or hear his voice.” You pouted.

“Yeah Richie she can’t control her heart. If it chose Patrick then it has got to be for a reason.” Ben defended. ‘The love expert’, as you liked to call him.

“Yeah the reason is that she’s insane.” Richie retorted.

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Coming Home Pt. 3 (Stan Uris/Reader)

Originally posted by anguishborn

part 1 / part 2

(A/N: You were warned. It’s Stan time fuckos. I hope no1 hates me yet)

Summary: Reader goes to Stan’s house to try and figure out why he’s avoiding her. THE ANSWER WILL SHOCK YOU!  (except probably not)

Warnings: Idk, this one is a little negative :( It will get better eventually, probably. 

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we stan him…

and him too…

although they are the same person 😂😂

BTS Reacts to their s/o stanning a member from another band


He would get possesive and jokingly take your device only to end up accidentally breaking it. After which he’d feel really bad and admit that he was just a bit jealous.

“Shit sorry….I only wanted you to look at me…will you forgive me?”


He’d instantly dislike the member you were stanning but act like he didn’t care. He’d start asking why you were stanning them and pretend he’d never even heard of them.

“Who’s that? What do you see in them? I’ve never heard of them.”


He’d start fanboying over the member with you even if he didn’t know who it was and would low key stalk them in order to find out why you liked them.

“Oh my god I love them too! Their music is so good! Who is this again?”


Jin would get mad at your device as if it was the member you were stanning. He’d be a bit hurt that someone else had caught your eye and get quiet around you until you reassure him that it’s him you love.

“Don’t you love me anymore Jagi?”


He’d be offended that someone else dared to capture your attention and he’ll do anything to get it back.

“Do you want me to dance for you? I have better muscles.”


He’d be clueless at first and wonder why you were looking at the same person over and over again. Then it would click and he’d cuddle you, making sure you still loved him.

“We’re still dating right jagiya? You love only me?”


Kookie would just let his jealousy build up inside him until he bursts. Backing you into a wall and making sure you know you’re his.

“You’re mine. Look at only me.”

- Admin M

polydactyl-orion  asked:

Consider this ask as a request to get that rant on Roadside Attraction STARTED!

Hoo boy. 

Okay, first of all, I sincerely apologize for leaving this unanswered so long. Things…happened. 

Disclaimer: I haven’t watched Roadside Attraction in a while so I might be slightly misremembering some of it. (It’d probably be a good idea to rewatch it first, but honestly just writing all this has got me riled up enough already. (look emotions are hard okay)

Disclaimer 2: I critique because I love, I swear. 

So when it comes down to it, I guess my problems with RA basically boil down to two big things:

1. The overall ‘message’ and how it treats the characters.

2. The weirdness of it existing at that point in the show in the first place.

First things first: look, don’t get me wrong, I’m all for media messages about not being a skeevy jerk and treating women as objects, but the way it was done in this episode was, honestly, just…weird. It basically introduces a character trait for Dipper (and, to a lesser extent, Stan; I mean I know Stan is…Stan, but did anyone really get ‘sleazy pickup artist’ as the vibe from any of his interactions with women that we saw before this episode?) that he was never shown to remotely have before or after (though admittedly there’s not a lot of ‘after’ to begin with), just so he could be taught a lesson about it that he never should have needed in the first place. 

Dipper’s problem has always been that’s he’s obsessed with one girl, and he certainly got plenty of embarrassment and woe out of that general experience, but ultimately that was good for him: he loosened up (somewhat), became more understanding and accepting of Wendy’s autonomy, and moved towards being able to deal with rejection while still being friends with her. That’s a satisfying arc and it makes no sense to me that they would suddenly partway reverse it and then use that as a reason to try and take Dipper down this weird incredibly short character arc that he didn’t need.

Is it realistic that you don’t just immediately get over someone even if intellectually accept that you’re not going to be together? Absolutely. But frankly, this is a weirdass time for Gravity Falls to be invoking realism. And regardless, realism does not automatically make for a better story, especially when that story has to be told in 22 minute intervals.

So it’s already weird that the show is portraying Dipper that way, but then what he does is really not all that heinous to begin with. The thing is, Stan is right. Dipper does need practice talking to-well, everyone, really, but especially girls. For God’s sake, the poor guy needed a massively oversized list, a bunch of clones, and a Rube Goldberg-esque plot just to ask Wendy to dance with him, a task he ultimately failed at anyway. (Which, honestly, even aside from intent, makes the whole idea of him successfully managing to actually lead any girls on to any degree pretty dang unbelievable.) And that’s really all he does with any of them, is talk. He doesn’t promise them anything except maybe to stay in touch, which we don’t really have any evidence he wasn’t planning on doing. Hell, even Stan, for all that we’re supposed to see his behavior as Not Good (which, to be fair, it usually is) doesn’t really do anything more than flirt with an apparently receptive woman and then take a walk with her, which is honestly way more honorable than most of Stan’s interactions with people. We’ve certainly seen him treat people way worse than that without getting condemned for it.

And then there’s the whole thing with Candy, which is…really frustrating. She puts Dipper in a situation he’s very, very obviously not comfortable with, demands something of him he never gave her an indication that he was interested in, and then when she doesn’t get what she wants…he has to apologize to her? By ‘admitting’ that he was being an idiot? What? 

Like, I know they were going for ‘don’t be a pickup artist’, basically, but what it came off as was more like ‘never interact with women because if you do they’ll immediately start acting like you’re in a relationship with them and expect you to act the same way and sometimes they might do that even if you don’t interact with them (also sometimes they might turn out to be spider women who will eat you)’. 

Basically, any time you set out to give the message ‘treat women with respect’ and instead wind up with ‘women are strange, irrational and sometimes horrifying’, I think you’ve really got to step back and reconsider things for a minute. 

But what’s especially weird to me is the contrast between this and the way the show treats Mabel’s behavior. Mabel’s been spending pretty much the whole show doing what this episode punishes Dipper for doing. We see her hitting on three boys in rapid succession within the first ten minutes of the show, her desire for a relationship and rather aggressive pursuit of that is the formation of a lot of plots during the show, and she’s only called on it when it gets to the point of hurting her friendships or literally imprisoning boys in her room.

I mean, I’m not trying to pick on Mabel here, or say that the show should have been calling her on that except when it got extreme (like, say, literally imprisoning boys in her room), at which point the show did call her on it. But it’s weird to me that the show then goes out of its way to condemn Dipper for doing basically the same thing except to a lesser degree. I guess you could argue that Mabel was looking for a relationship and Dipper was looking for ‘practice’, but that still doesn’t really work for me; in both instances they have a goal in mind for which the specific other person involved is basically a variable. Why is Mabel wanting an Epic Summer Romance with more or less any boy worse than Dipper wanting to just talk to more or less any girl? And at any rate, Dipper’s attitude in RA hardly seems any worse towards the girls than the attitude Mabel, Grenda and Candy went into the Northwest party with towards the boys, but we’re supposed to take one as being terrible and the other as being perfectly normal girl behavior. 

So yeah, there’s that. Now, part two. (Still with me?)

The pacing. This episode makes absolutely no sense to me where it is. You spend 3/4s of the show building up to this big reveal that completely alters the atmosphere, plot, and character dynamics, and now you have all of five episodes to explore all the ramifications of that while ramping up the tension towards the big finale…why would you make one of those a filler episode that has no impact on the plot at all and is so disconnected to anything that it could have been stuck pretty much anywhere else in the show without next to no changes? 

Like, okay, I’ll admit, part of why I don’t like this episode is because it doesn’t have Ford in it. And hey, that’s a personal thing. But it’s not just about me wanting MOAR FORD. The thing is, regardless of whether you like him or loathe him or whatever, Ford is, objectively, an incredibly important character. He’s the catalyst for the central plot and driving mystery of the show and the principle catalyst for the oncoming confrontation, his appearance changes pretty much everything that we took for granted about the show before, and just by existing he has a huge impact directly on Stan and Dipper and indirectly on Mabel (in that his interactions with Dipper in turn impact Mabel’s relationship with him). And, again, you have five episodes to explore all this. In one of them Ford’s barely there at all and then in this one he doesn’t even get mentioned. We don’t even get an explanation for why he’s suddenly absent. (I know we do in the Journal, but not in the show itself.) I just…that doesn’t make any sense to me. I mean, maybe I’m showing favoritism here, but-no offense to Candy-I really don’t get why she gets more character focus in this episode than, y’know. The long-lost close family member with massive unresolved issues and a huge amount of secrets. 

And it doesn’t make any sense to me to have a light-hearted filler episode with nothing to do with the plot so very close to the finale when the tension is so high and the last episode literally ended with a very ominous threat. It certainly doesn’t make sense in plot terms that they spent so much time last episode working to protect the Shack so they had a sanctuary from Bill, and then everyone runs away from the Shack. I just. What.

And, this is a lesser point, but it doesn’t really make sense to me for them to leave Gravity Falls itself at that point in the show. Just, sure, we know weird stuff exists in plenty of other places, but there’s a lot of focus on there being something especially weird and significant about Gravity Falls specifically. And that’s something that gets really dialed up in this last part of the show-Ford specifically seeking the town out to study, the significance of the Mystery Shack and all its secrets, the connection Bill has to the area, the crashed UFO, and of course it all builds up to a big plot point in the finale that Bill’s confined to Gravity Falls. But then right smack in the middle of all that we briefly detour to some pretty much unrelated location for…what reason? It’s like MYSTERY OF GRAVITY FALLS  MYSTERY OF GRAVITY FALLS  MYSTERY OF GRAVITY FALLS oh by the way there’s some spider people over here too MYSTERY OF GRAVITY FALLS. It’s not a huge deal but it feels weird to me, especially since the show had hardly been going on so long that that they had worn out the setting. 

I know I’m committing the great sin of claiming to know better than the writers, but since we’ve come this far anyway, you know what I think would have worked better than Roadside Attraction?

You’ve already got this idea of the other tourist trap owners annually pranking Stan, so why not just go with that? Have them come to him like they apparently usually do. That way:

-You can keep the focus on Gravity Falls and all the plot points therein.

-You don’t have the problem of everyone inexplicably leaving their sanctuary; in fact, that adds to the plot, because now they have even more motivation to protect the Mystery Shack.

-You’ve got a lot of opportunity for character interplay as the family has to deal with all this (imagine the opportunity for conflict between Ford and Stan over the house, and how much you could build up the oncoming tension of Stan having to leave the Shack by showing how much he had really made it his home over the years).

-You can still hint at the existence of weirdness outside Gravity Falls without taking the focus away from it.

-You could expand on Stan’s past a little-because God knows we all wanted it-by referencing what was going on with him and these other rivals for all these years, and show a bit more about how the Shack actually operates as a tourist trap, which I, at least, would have liked to see.

-You could continue the ongoing character arc of Dipper’s relationship with Ford and how that was impacting his relationship with Mabel, instead of dropping it for something completely out of the blue.

-You could still have a bit of a breather episode before the finale (since that was evidently the reason we got this one here in the first place) without having to completely drop the plot and derail all the building tension to do so. 

-Tell me you wouldn’t want to see a full-scale Pines family prank war unleashed, because I sure as hell would

But anyway, in conclusion:

I don’t like Roadside Attraction much. 

Fisherman’s Knot Chapter 17


[Title Songs]

[Chapter 1] [Chapter 2] [Chapter 3] [Chapter 4] [Chapter 5][Chapter 6] [Chapter 7] [Chapter 8] [Chapter 9] [Chapter 10] [Chapter 11] [Chapter 12] [Chapter 13][Chapter 14] [Chapter 15] [Chapter 16]

Warnings for abuse and also a lot of internalized victim-blaming.

Thanks as always to @thesnadger for beta-ing, thanks to @marypsue for helping me work out some plot snarls, and thanks to all of you for your readership, comments, and patience.

The Devil And The Deep Blue Sea

Ford’s breath caught in his throat. His mind reeled, searching for an excuse, a bluff, anything to get them back on track. Stan could have managed it. Perhaps under different circumstances Ford could have too. If that smile wasn’t so familiar. If the grip on his wrists wasn’t so tight. But try as he might, his mind remained blank.

“I … don’t know what you mean,” he said.  His tone hovered somewhere between confusion and bravado. It wouldn’t fool anyone.

He should have brought a weapon. Something to remember for next time, if there was one. Note to self: don’t listen to children who complain about how a high-caliber plasma blaster would ruin the outline of his suit.

“Tell me, Stanford,” said Doctor Smith. “Do I look like an idiot?”

“No?” Ford replied. You look like a triangle, he thought, and almost giggled at how absurd that would sound if he said it.

“Really?” Doctor Smith straightened up and stood back, crossing his arms. “Then how did you expect me to fall for your transparent little scheme? Did you think I wouldn’t suspect?”

“I … suspect what?” said Ford. He could feel his heart picking up, a drumbeat of terror slicing straight through him. Did he know? Did he suspect? If he knew where Nuala’s skin was truly hidden … if Stan was in danger—

“I knew what you were here for from the beginning. You wanted to steal Sarah away from me!”

“That’s preposterous!” Ford blustered, hoping that he could pass the quaver in his voice off as anger. “Now unhand me or I—”

Doctor Smith laughed, and it was cultured and germane and terrible as his situation was Ford felt himself breathing easier. It wasn’t a cackle. It wasn’t like—he almost thought “his Bill” and felt the bile rise at the back of his throat. It wasn’t like Bill Cipher. This was just a man. No more powerful than him.

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