why did you have to kill him

Original #13: I Didn’t Mean To Kill Stan

Length: Short

Note: This story includes sensitive adult themes. 

I really didn’t. Why would I? Stan was my best mate. We’d been friends since high school.

I hadn’t meant to kill him. I just wanted him to shut up. All I did was tap him on the head with my hockey stick, for crying out loud. And then down he went, making a mess along the way. Crashing into stuff, grabbing onto furniture. Do you have any idea how long it’ll take me to clean up all that blood?

Anyway, like I said. Stan was my man. He was my homie, my bromie, my Steve Buscemi. I trusted him with my life. But just now, when I left my room to get a drink, I come back and what the hell do I see? Stan was messing around my laptop. Just clicking on shit and looking at my personal stuff. So right there, it was clear that Stan was in the wrong.

And then what happens? He goes absolutely insane. He starts yelling and calling me names and demanding explanations about some pictures I got on my laptop. In my own house! I tell him to calm down but he wasn’t having any of it. So I did what I gotta do. I shut him up. Maybe a tad too enthusiastically, but it was an honest mistake. Killing him, I mean.

I know what you’re wondering about right now. What pictures?

I’ll come clean, alright? They were pictures of Stan’s sister, Stephanie.  

But, look – it’s not weird. I’m dating her. I’m her boyfriend. So naturally, I’m going to have some pictures of her in my laptop. But Stan doesn’t understand. He’s a great guy, but we don’t see eye to eye on some things. Like Steph.

I first met Steph a year ago. I was at Stan’s crib, just hanging and chatting when this absolute babe walked past the living room. I mean, she was so sexy. Va-va-vroom and all that. The way she moved, the way she carried herself, she had such an air of confidence that impressed me right away.

I knew I had to have her.

But I knew I had to take it slow. I had to gain her trust. Turn on the charm, make her fall back in love with me. So that was exactly what I did. Whenever I was at Stan’s place, I would drop in to Steph’s room and say hello. Gradually she become more comfortable around me, and our conversations grew longer. I learned about her hobbies, her favorite music, her favorite TV shows, and all that.

I also learned that she loved ice-cream. So on our very first date, I brought her out to this really classy ice cream parlour downtown. Bought her her favorite flavour – chocolate chip, in case you’re wondering. After that, we went to the theatre and watched this movie that she had really been looking forward to. It was a great date.

But here’s the thing about Steph. She’s a lovely lady, but she’s very conservative. She doesn’t like, shall I say, the hanky panky business that relationships usually entail. I tried to cop a feel one time on one of our dates and she didn’t go for that at all. Said she wasn’t comfortable.

Here’s what you gotta know about me. I’m a gentleman. If my lady is no ready, then I’ll do the waity. I respected her preferences and our dates remained purely verbal. No tactile movements at all.

But here’s another thing you gotta know about me. I’m a dude. I have needs and desires. So if my lady wasn’t gonna give me action, I gotta get them from somewhere else. But I didn’t wanna cheat on Steph too, so I couldn’t go messing around with other girls.

So I compromised. I went to the hardware store and bought a couple of surveillance cameras. You know, the sort that you can hide in corners and on top shelves to watch people. And they were the good kinds, too. With a click of a button from my laptop, I could take pictures from the livestreaming videos. What can I say? Only the best for my lady. Then one day while Steph was using the loo, I installed them in her room. Easy peasy. One on the top shelf facing her bed, and one on another shelf, facing her closet.

It was all going great. I had tons of fantastic pictures and videos of Steph.

And then Stan had to step in. Almost threw a wrench in my plans, what with all the yelling and hollering. Luckily, there was no one else in my house. I would have hated to remove the cameras from Steph’s room!

So anyway, that’s that. I just wanted to get this off my chest. Stan thought that I’m a bad guy, but I really am not. I truly, truly, love Stephanie from the bottom of my heart.

Speaking of Steph, I really should get going. This entire thing with Stan almost threw my A-game off. I’d almost forgotten that we’ve got tickets to go see Steph’s third grade dance recital. I would have hated to miss that!

PLL QUESTIONS

I didn’t know Maya had a brother or sister, did you guys?? How does she have a niece? Did her parents adopt after Maya died? Sara Harvey was around because???? Alex killed Wren because??? Why didn’t she just lock him up in her weird lair thing? Why is Addison a thing?? Marlene you said no loose ends why is Addison missing? I probably need to watch the episode again but did Wren know the twins Lily and Grace were his?? Why didn’t Wren warn the girls… like love or not Spencer and the girls are your friends Why do Emily and Alison’s twin look more like Ali when Ali is the surrogate? Emily is Filipina, Korean, Irish and Scottish  the babies have blue eyes and blonde hair, I don’t really know much about Wren but really blue eyes blonde hair?? What was the Braille book thing with Jenna about?? What about Officer Maple? How come no one has figured out if only one cop shows up then something is wrong? As far as we know Toby isn’t a cop anymore so why only one cop? (Yes, I know it turned out to be Mona’s bf in the end probably faking being a cop) Where is the follow up questions for Spencer and Ezra about what went on underground? I get it, it was a joke because of how drunk they were but how did the moms get out of the basement?!? Honestly they did Maya wrong in this show, so rude, she got killed by a cousin who turned out to be her stalker?? What? WHAT DID MAYA KNOW? DID SHE KNOW WHAT NOEL KNEW? Also damn RIP Noel his head is chopped The Bethany Young of it all? Why wasn’t Jenna able to see again!? I get it she used her sense of smell to figure out Spencer wasn’t actually Spencer but Jenna is smart she would not have just gotten cocky and not used her other senses if she got her sight back. I just wanted Jenna to be happy but than again she did have that great scene with Addison so I guess whatever. How did the girls not notice Spencer wasn’t Spencer but a horse, Jenna and Ezra!! Ezra of all people!! Knew something wasn’t right! Like Toby I thought you loved Spencer but I will give you props for using her favorite poem. Also you could tell which twin was Spencer because the real Spencer cries alot and Alex wasn’t crying You’re telling me Melissa didn’t play a part in this at all? Lies So Marco left the investigation to Tanner but I mean is he okay? I’m confused but that what PLL does but it’s the series finale so no more answers to our questions

Originally posted by xeptum

dai characters as things teachers have said to me

cassandra: oh sorry. i was into this new romance novel i got over the weekend and spaced out what was your question

varric: i have a retirement plan in place and it’s going to be rad. i’m not telling any of you because it’s super cool and all of you will steal it but it’s cool i’ll be famous 

solas: im kinda of like the school gypsy. im here for one year and boom then im gone

iron bull: the june on the board is a reminder for when i have to arm wrestle this kid in my algebra class. if he wins they get 10 extra points on their finals but if i win i get satisfaction of winning and my pride 

dorian: i think it’s important that you all learn to be yourselves and not like your peers or your parents. like me for example. my father was a mean bastard. me? im a sarcastic bastard. be yourself kids

cole:i think sophia’s right, not all ghosts have to be mean. if i was a ghost i’d be a helpful ghost. i’d do taxes or something

vivienne: and this is… wait, wait a second. let’s take a moment to take in what he is wearing, those shoes do not that match that outfit 

blackwall: hey guys just a side note in this contest between teachers dont vote for me. if i win not only will i be decorated but they’ll make me and mr chasse shave our beards and if my beard goes i go

sera: i hate the no cursing rule. as long as im not cursing at anyone i should be already. if i say ‘hey student fuck you’ then im screwed but if i go to this crap tv and say ‘come on you piece of shit turn on’ i should be alright, right?

cullen: cough drops? that’s drugs you cant have drugs here. I’m kidding i’ll take anything to numb the pain of living. 

leliana: if a bad guy were to walk into this room i could kill him in eight different ways so there’s no need to worry about anything like that

josephine: why did everything in history have to end in a fight im sure if they all just got into a room and talked it out they could have gotten to some sort of agreement

100 Dialogue Prompts: Part 4

It’s amazing to see how much we can create together, my amigos. Here’s part 4.

  1. “Look, I might be evil but even I have standards.”
  2. “Do your parents know you’re dating Death?” “No, I promised we wouldn’t get back together after he broke up with me the first time.”
  3. “Wait why am I naked and covered in cheese?”
  4. “Good god, that cake is fuckin stale and dry mate!!” “Just like how you are recently? Gee, thanks.”
  5. "There is always time for a high-five.”
  6. “Karen, what would ever posses you to find me here.”
  7. “Oh my god, put that man down! Come on, let’s go get you some REAL food.”
  8. “A demonic sugar glider?”
  9. “People always say they never thought they would be here but I absolutely did.”
  10. “And I thought I was a bit weird. But you! You are insane!”
  11. “So your hair knows kung-fu? Ha, that’s nothing! MY hair knows HAIR-ATE!” (You know, as in karate) (This used to be an insider between me and a friend…)
  12. “One day, darling, you and I are going to conquer the Universe not just our world.”
  13. “Did you seriously think they wouldn’t notice when their humans went missing?!”
  14. “Well, maybe next time you should consider that not everyone wants to be woken up at four in the morning by a- what IS that, anyway?!”
  15. “Now, how exactly did your foot get stuck in the barrel?”
  16. “I hope you realize what you’re doing. This forest never ends, you know that, right?”
  17. “You can’t just kill someone and then make it all better by saying sorry!”
  18. “Why the fuck is my cat levitating?!” “He said he wanted to feel what flying was”
  19. “You’re trying to tell me you killed three men…with a microphone?”
  20. “Hang on, are you a John Wick fan?”
  21. “IT’S TWO IN THE MORNING!” “And?” “ I have a strict no murder rule until eight. Call me then.”
  22. “I did realize you were going to be naked the whole time”
  23. “Ok, I understand you like animals, but you can’t just bring a tiger into the apparent without asking!”
  24. “I…I didn’t want you to find out like this. I’m so sorry.”
  25. “OH MY GOD CATHERINE! I JUST SAW A NARWHAL! I’M TELLING YOU, I SAW A FREAKIN’ WHALE UNICORN!”
  26. “I gotta go, I left my toaster in the oven!
  27. "Why is there a gaggle of fancy buisness men on my front lawn?”
  28. “Can you please stop referring to me as ____! That’s not my name!” “Then what is?” “I don’t know!”
  29. *Sarcastic* “Yeah, sure. I won’t at all mind being your footslave.” “Oh, goody! I knew you’d agree!” “Wait, what?”
  30. “When are you going to give up on this whole ‘evil’ thing?” “When it stops being so much fun!”
  31. “You didnt say to KILL the man!” “WELL I DIDNT SAY NOT TOO”
  32. “Mum, Dad… I’m gay.” “That’s nice, honey, but now is not the right time!”
  33. “Take a look at your soul and consider your life choices! Oh wait, that’s right! You don’t fucking have a soul!” “Oh, god, just go drown in a bathtub of syrup why don’t ya?”
  34. “I kindly ask you to please quit making your heart stop. It’s creeping me out!” “So… Y-You were sleeping in a coffin” “Yeah I’m used to it” “Are you a vampire or what?! How can someone get used to sleep in a coffin?” “No I’m used to sleep I never said that I’m used to sleep in a freaking coffin!”
  35. “Darling I love you, more than I can ever express in words…. But please stop teaching chickens necromancy.”
  36. “I wanted to know why you stole souls, not your melodramatic backstory…”
  37. “I really wish that old white man would stop rubbing his nipples at me”
  38. “You know it is written: Do not summon Satan, right ?”
  39. “Look around, what is this?” “My room?” “No, this is pathetic.”
  40. “I’ve been a professor for 20 years, and yet still my greatest secret hasn’t been revealed–I can’t read.”
  41. “Our souls don’t belong in these 'human’ bodies, every one of us is implanted here from another galaxy, and this has been the case for a thousand years. No one knows what 'actual humans’ are like without us inhabiting them.”
  42. “Did you just create a portal in time and space to pull another version of yourself into this world so I have to deal with another annoying idiot?” “No but thanks for the idea.”
  43. “You’re bleeding?!” “Nah, I’m frolicing in a field of flowers - yes I’m bleeding!”
  44. “Let me get this straight. I tell you that I make a decent omelette and you somehow equate that to qualification for piloting a spaceship?”
  45. “It’s the weekend! Let’s hit the town! See a concert, redo our wardrobes, get high, start a crime ring, I don’t know.”
  46. “Keep running, you’ve only got 4HP!”
  47. “This is clearly your first time. Stop screaming already, you’ll wake the neighbors!”
  48. “Has anyone seen the outdoors?” “What the fuck is an outdoors?”
  49. “Why do I feel like this again, I thought we were done with this?”
  50. “Look, as much as I like to hang out with you, I’ve gotta go and save the earth. Toodles!”
  51. “Have you seen?… oh shit”
  52. “Two questions: one, how many matches do you have, and two, where do you keep your socks?”
  53. “Because fuck surveys, that’s why!”
  54. “Stop yelling out the window or the koalas will rip your face off!”
  55. “I guess when I heard 'Night of Debauchery’… I didn’t picture muffins on your pajamas.”
  56. “Honey, you can’t keep throwing people to the pit of pain and despair just because they don’t like choc mint ice cream.”
  57. “Oh, no honey, put that back…”
  58. “It’s going to be too late, you know. It’s always too late.”
  59. “Hey, so, uh… I’m in trouble…” “What did you do this time?” “I got stranded in Wales….. again…”
  60. “OK, but… how do we get the dog out of a hole in space in time exactly?”
  61. “Aren’t people supposed to grow instead of shrink ?”
  62. “Wait. You’re aroused?” “Why would that surprise you?” “It does on account of you being covered in blood. Wipe that smile off your face. You look like a cat in heat.”
  63. "I pay your taxes”
  64. “No, ____. We did not raise our hamster like this.”
  65. “You can’t run from your own shadow(s), what makes you think you can run from theirs?”
  66. “You adopted… a dog?” “Mate, that’s not a dog.”
  67. “And at this moment, he decided to punch himself in the face.” “Narrator, listen, I know you’ve been with me my whole life, but you’re a huge jerk.”
  68. “Why didn’t you tell me it was a portal BEFORE we ended up here?”
  69. “Is that…the Mona Lisa.” “…Yes…” “What did I say to you about stealing priceless artifacts!?” “…That I had to take you with me next time.” “Exactly!”
  70. “Yes, I agree, magic is pretty cool. But did you really have to use it for THIS?”
  71. “Despite the fact that was epic, you’re still suspended”
  72. “Chill, dad it’s not what you think it is!” “Well it looks like you’re making out with the demon your grandma banished to cellar…WHY IS HE IN YOUR ROOM?”
  73. “If you truly love me you’ll let me-OH FUCKING HELL DID YOU JUST STAB ME!?”
  74. “Spoon”
  75. “What began as a conflict over the transfer of consciousness from flesh to machines escalated into a war which has decimated a Million worlds.The ___ and the ___ have all but exhausted the the resources of a galaxy in their struggle for domination. Both sides, now crippled beyond repair, the remnants of their armies continue to battle on ravaged planets, their hatred fueled by over four thousand years of total war. This is a fight to the death. For each side, the only acceptable outcome is…“
  76. ”… I’m going back to bed. You brought it here, you can deal with the mammoth yourself.“
  77. "Is the food supposed to be moving?”
  78. “You mean to tell me that in the two minutes I was gone,  you bombed a minor country,  got married to a stripper,  and assassinated a world leader?!”
  79. “Is that a unicorn???? EATING MY BEEF JERKY?!”
  80. “Do I get to dream about you again tonight?”
  81. “Well now I have to change clothes AGAIN!”
  82. “All of this was because of a… OF A PLUSHIE?!” “Well…Yeah?” “Great, how are we going to get out of jail now?!”
  83. “So…you gonna tell me why my brother is upside down and why you’re wearing my purple thong?”
  84. “Did you really have to burn down another Cracker Barrel?”
  85. “Sir, that’s impossible, you can’t do that.” “IS THAT A FUCKING CHALLENGE?!?!”
  86. “We need to invade Portugal.” “…Sure, why not?”
  87. “Did you divide by zero?! YOU’RE GOING TO KILL US ALL”
  88. “Stand down, Milady, this is a matter between gentlemen with mustaches.”
  89. “Next time you get arrested I am NOT paying your bail” “That’s a lie and you know it.” “….”
  90. “I thought you were dead.” “So did I”
  91. “John dont flush the dog down the toilet”
  92. “What did I say again about resurrecting dictators??”
  93. “Cucumbers are NOT pets… what do you mean, you ate him??”
  94. “Are you and God seriously fighting right now? And what happened to Satan?”
  95. “Are ferrets supposed to be blue??”
  96. “I’m the protagonist? Well I guess that explains why I look like about a thousand other people.”
  97. “Why do I do this to myself?”
  98. “Stop eating your tortilla chips with ketchup. It’s unattractive.”
  99. “How do you eat an entire cheese wheel in one sitting?”
  100. “Why are God and Satan moving in with us?”

Let’s make one more ‘100 Dialogue Prompts’ list together. Leave a comment with your prompt below. Don’t forget the double quotes “”. And as always, only one prompt per amigo! Also, here is your random Dutch word of the day: pindakaas

UPDATE: if u wanna talk about this personal vent that blew up send me a message, i’m not answering the anons lol. i know there are autistic people that disagree but this is directed specifically at allistic people that participate in ableism and yet do the whole meme thing and that it made me and yes, many others uncomfortable. particularly as many of the joke posts start with someone not understanding why the joke is funny, etc. if you’re not autistic however literally you can like not even interact with this post like i really do not care.


like i get the Joke or whatever but i’m here to be that annoying reminder that autism exists and all of you are complicit in ableism re: the babadook 

the movie is… pretty…clearly about ableism? her son is autistic- that’s why he’s bullied, that’s why he has meltdowns and sensory issues and doesn’t pick up on social cues, that’s why he’s ‘annoying’, that’s why her sister just Hates him- and she’s your typical autism mom. she takes it all out on her son, she hates that she gave birth to a child that was fucked up and Wrong and lost her husband in the process, she doesn’t have enough ‘support’, nobody understands, etc. he’s annoying and loud and complicated and she hates him the way some of you in the audience did. 

the babadook is her hatred of him, her inability to accept his autism, etc. that’s why she tries to kill him(the way so many autism moms do, the way autism speaks tries defend), that’s why she tries to physically abuse it out of him, that’s why she has to ‘feed the monster’ every so often (the way autism moms™ have their ‘mom days’ to complain about how much they can’t stand their kid, how sometimes they wish they’d never been born, how they consider drowning them in kiddie pools bc it’d be ‘kinder’, the way that famous anti-vaxxers report having to go stand in rooms and throw shit at walls to avoid hitting their kid)

it’s…really apparent to me as an autistic person and it is so many others, too? sam has to protect his mother from the babadook. he’s terrified of it (her)- the movie even makes clear that she was the one that wrote the book. she tries to kill both herself and sam (glass in the food). she becomes more and more unstable, aggressive, and violent, and sam’s response as an autistic child is to mirror what he sees. his meltdowns increase, he has less support, he spends all his time latching on to the remnants of the only person he has. 

like it’s…idk, really uncomfortable for me to see all these allistic people first making fun of how annoying the (autistic) kid was, and misinterpreting the movie to a frankly astounding degree, and then the Joke is that straight people don’t get how he’s a ~gay icon~ (which… many of the people in the first few posts from which the meme comes were autistic…. )

idk. it’s really weird for me to see allistics carry on with this elaborate lgbt icon joke by laughing in the faces of people that don’t understand why, when half of us are autistic… being mocked for not understanding a movie…about ableism…by allistic people. the mind boggles. 

i mean whatever its a joke gay babadook etc but y’all didn’t even get it the first time and you’re joyfully, self-assuredly ableist all the time so it’s really weird that this is just kind of drowning out all of the #actuallyautistic posts i was enjoying reading in the tag but i mean, allistics will be allistics, i guess 

I SAW SPLIT

BEFORE YOU ALL PUSH THE UNFOLLOW AND BLOCK BUTTONS LISTEN TO ME. THERE ARE SPOILERS BUT I FEEL IT NECESSARY TO MAKE MY POINT.

The movie is being portrayed on here (tumblr) as though it is making people with DID as terrifying and harmful. This is why so many people are boycotting the movie. Now you can hold this belief but I do not believe it.

If you actually see the movie, you will see that it is not about a man who is consumed by evil and wants to kill people. It is about a man with 23 personalities that has certain parts of him that have harmful beliefs but he tries so hard to convince them that they are incorrect and the harmful parts of him only feel this way because they are tired of being ignored and treated like they’re crazy. (Even in the end, after he goes crazy, Dennis and Hedwig (2 of his main personalities) are talking and Hedwig says that this incident means that people have to realize they all exist.) The film highlights the struggle between his different personalities and how they all came about and why they hold the beliefs they do. It also highlights how ignored the illness is in society and even in mental health communities. For this reason, I can say that the movie is not “corrupting society to believe that people with disorders are frightening.” The movie trailers show it the way they do to attract people who want to see horror movies but when you actually see the movie, it is so much more than that.

The film also highlights abuse/trauma victims and not in a way that makes them weak. The main character is beautiful and strong and doesn’t rely on anyone else to save her. She, herself, runs, fights, and helps herself. At the end, she gets herself help for the abuse situation she has been in for a long time, the only help coming from the police officer that she turns to. For this reason, I can say that the movie did not portray abuse victims in a bad way.

STOP FEEDING INTO THE PEOPLE THAT ARE TELLING YOU THIS MOVIE IS HORRIBLE. THEY ARE TRYING TO MAKE PEOPLE WITH DISORDERS MORE VISIBLE TO THE MAINSTREAM MEDIA.

dokurochrome  asked:

Yurio gets drunk for the first time and he just goes on twitter and rambles about how he really likes Victuuri actually.

Twitter Rambles

Yuri Plisetsky @yuri-plisetsky 
I wish I had @v-nikiforov hair when it was long. It was so pretty.

Yuri Plisetsky @yuri-plisetsky 
You don’t understand, his hair was so pretty. I cried when @v-nikiforov cut it.

Yuri Plisetsky @yuri-plisetsky 
Do not get me started on @yuurikatsuki

Yuri Plisetsky @yuri-plisetsky
@yuurikatsuki is prettier than @v-nikiforov. There I said it.

Yuri Plisetsky @yuri-plisetsky 
I mean, @yuurikatsuki can go from cute and dorky to sex symbol in like seconds

Christophe Giacometti @christophe-gc
Sounds like someone has a crush @yuri-plisetsky 

Yuri Plisetsky @yuri-plisetsky 
What gibberish are you sprouting @christophe-gc?

Yuri Plisetsky @yuri-plisetsky 
I sometimes wonder who has better legs between @christophe-gc or @v-nikiforov

Phichit Chulanont @phichit+chu
And who wins? @yuri-plisetsky 

Yuri Plisetsky @yuri-plisetsky 
It was @v-nikiforov until I saw you in shorts @phichit+chu  

Phichit Chulanont @phichit+chu
Did you just flirt with me @yuri-plisetsky?

Yuri Plisetsky @yuri-plisetsky 
No @phichit+chu, I didn’t flirt with you. My boyfriend would kill me.

Yuri Plisetsky @yuri-plisetsky 
I have the best boyfriend ever.

Christophe Giacometti @christophe-gc 
Please do tell us about your boyfriend @yuri-plisetsky 

Yuri Plisetsky @yuri-plisetsky 
But you know him @christophe-gc

Christophe Giacometti @christophe-gc
I do? @yuri-plisetsky 

Yuri Plisetsky @yuri-plisetsky 
Yeah @otabek-altin 

Victor Nikiforov @v-nikiforov
WHO IS DATING MY SON!? @yuri-plisetsky 

Yuuri Katsuki @yuurikatsuki 
Is no one else concern as to why @yuri-plisetsky is suddenly being so honest.

Yuri Plisetsky @yuri-plisetsky 
Yura decided to have a few drinks tonight. Please disregard everything that he said.

Victor Nikiforov @v-nikiforov 
NO!!! MY ADORABLE, BABY BOY IS DATING SOMEONE!!! I WILL NOT LET THIS SLIDE!!! @yuri-plisetsky 

Yuuri Katsuki @yuurikatsuki 
Thank you for looking after him @otabek-altin @yuri-plisetsky 


Yuri groaned as he shifts around in bed, his tongue tasting like cardboard and his head pounding.

“I told you not to drink,” a voice said, causing him to groan.

“Too loud,” he mumbled while attempting to drag the blankets over his head, only to find them pinned down by something.

He huffed as he shifted around until he found a warm spot that had clearly been taken up by his boyfriend not moments ago.

“Yura,” his boyfriends voice rang out as he was nudged. “I have water and painkillers.”

He groaned, refusing to sit up.

“You said some horrible things on twitter,” he slowly cracked an eye open to see Otabek Altin standing above him with a glass of water. He sighed as he shifted into an upright position and accepted the water and tablets handed to him.

“How bad?” he croaked out after finishing the whole glass of water in an attempt to get the cardboard taste out of his mouth. Instead of answering, his phone appeared in front of his face.

“You tell me,” he huffed while taking the phone and quickly set to work opening the twitter app and groaning at all the horrible confessions he made the night before.

“Let’s run away,” he mumbled as he was joined on the bed by his boyfriend.

“If that is what you want,” Otabek said while wrapping him up in a hug.

“Better than dealing with the lovesick couple.” Yuri mumbled as he settled into Otabek’s side for a few more hours’ sleep. Hopefully his headache would be gone by then.

Twitter War AU

SKAMS04E08 Clip 1 - Miss you

[SANA: Hi. There’s something I have to tell you.

Hi. What are you doing today? Can we meet up?

CHRIS: I’m hungover af

VILDE: Magnus and I are talking.

NOORA: How are you doing Vilde?

VILDE: He thinks I’ve cheated on him with Elias.

EVA: We’re gonna kill those who made the hate account. Sana: I’m also hungover af and dad is visiting from Bergen to celebrate my 18th birthday. Yippee!

No Yippee.

Plus fml.

CHRIS: Eva!! Mom said it’s okay for us to celebrate your 18th birthday at my place on Friday!!

EVA: SHE DID?? Fucking hell!!

CHRIS: She asked why you couldn’t have it at your place, and I was like… ehhh.. they’re renovating. After the last party.

EVA: Hahahaha!! Awesome!! Who are we going to invite??

[Elias watching Youtube video of the boys]

SANA: Hi.

ELIAS: Talking to me?

SANA: Sorry for being mad.

ELIAS: So you’re not mad anymore? That’s good. I thought you were going to be mad for the rest of your life.

[YOUSEF: Okay, are you ready?]

SANA: Why aren’t you friends with Even anymore?

ELIAS: No, the guy doesn’t want to be with us anymore, so we can’t make him.

SANA: So it’s not because he.. tried to kiss Mikael? Because I heard Mikael freaked out.

ELIAS: That’s not why. It’s.. A lot happened. The guy just started doing a lot of random stuff. Then he tried kissing Mikael, among other things. And we tried to get him to chill, but it didn’t work. Then he dropped out of school and I talked to Sonja and she told me he was depressed. And when she told us we tried to call him and text him a lot, but.. So it’s his deal if he doesn’t wanna hang out with us.

SANA: You know he’s dating Isak? I think he misses you.. Because he asked about you the other day.

ELIAS: He did? Tell him hi, then. Hey. You know Yousef?

SANA: Just forget about it. I’m over him.

Yuri on Ice from Yakov’s perspective

Banquet:

 Yuri don’t let yourself get baited into a dance batt- I SAID DON’T GET BAITED INTO A DANCE BATTLE! GODDAMNIT YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO BE MEETING SPONSERS!

Victor! Mila! Stop encouraging them! AND STOP TAKING PICTURES

Victor you’re not even drunk! STOP DANCING WITH THE SLOPPY DRUNK

Why is there a stripper pole in here? Why is this allowed to get out of hand? WHERE THE HELL ARE CHRIS AND THIS DRUNK’S COACHES?!?

Victor! DON’T LET DRUNKS HUMP YOU IN FRONT OF SPONSERS! NO, YOU CAN’T TAKE HIM BACK TO HIS ROOM! I DON’T CARE IF YOU THINK YOU’RE IN LOVE HE’S DRUNK AND YOU’RE AN IDIOT! I’LL TAKE HIM BACK TO HIS ROOM BEFORE YOU MAKE ANY MORE BAD DECISIONS.

- *sends Celestino a strongly worded email about keeping an eye on his pupils in the future the next morning*

Episode One

- Victor stop. Stop pining. You aren’t in love. No I don’t believe in love at first sight and I certainly don’t believe in love at first drunken humping. You’re right I’m not taking this seriously. He hasn’t contacted you because he was DRUNK OUT OF HIS MIND! Did you see how much booze he downed? It’s a wonder he didn’t die of alcohol poisoning. Just stfu and skate.

- Victor no. It’s not a message. Victor no! Don’t give up your career for an ill-advised booty call! UGH if I can’t stop you just make sure our Yuri doesn’t find out where you went.

Episode Two

- WHY ARE YOU IN JAPAN TOO YURI! I COULDN’T STOP VICTOR MAKING AN ILL-ADVISED BOOTY CALL BUT YOU ARE TOO YOUNG TO BE ATTEMPTING THAT! YEAH SURE YOU’RE NOT THERE FOR THAT I’VE SEEN YOUR ROOM! …NO ONE HAS 30 POSTERS OF SOMEONE IN THEIR ROOM BECAUSE THEY ‘HATE THEM JUST SO MUCH’ YOU’RE FOOLING NO ONE KID!

Episode Three

- OMFG did you really give him a program about the night he got sloppy drunk and you turned into even a bigger moron? You’re going to put me into an early grave.

Episode Four

- MILA! STOP POKING THE SMOL ANGRY CHILD! HIS SCREECHING HURTS MY EARS!

- Wait, why the hell do I have to go live with my ex-wife and the angsty teen? I don’t want to have to listen to a list of my failures or a catalogue of all the ways Drunk Yuri is the worst especially as it tends to devolve into ‘stupid pig, how dare he be so good looking’.

Episode Five

- Victor stop trying to pretend this isn’t an elaborate booty call. This is not how coaching works.

Episode Six

- I have the living legend who gave it all up to be a pretend coach in order to get with a sloppy drunk, a sadist of a female skater who stirs up trouble on purpose, an angsty teen who can’t tell the difference between having a crush and hating someone and an emo skater who is far too old to be as emo as he is. Kill me now.

Episode Seven

- Maybe I was giving Victor a disservice. His student is actually doing quite well and maybe they are taking it seriously and HOLY FUCK NEVERMIND JUST KISS YOUR STUDENT IN FRONT OF THE WHOLE FUCKING WORLD VICTOR YOU ASSHAT

Episode Eight

- Yuri has calmed down and I’m just going to ignore Victor. Yep that’ll work OMFG did you HAVE TO KISS HIS FUCKING SKATE?!? THIS IS WHY YOU WEREN’T ALLOWED TO TAKE HIM BACK TO THE HOTEL ROOM! YOU HAVE NO CHILL!

You want me to what? Be his coach? Well…only because I like Maccachin.

Episode Nine

- You’re alright actually, I hereby allow you the name Japanese Yuri instead of Drunk Yuri. You may be the only sane person I know surprisingly. I still am going to tell you off for fucking up though.

- ….I take it all back. WTF was up with all the hugging.

Episode Ten

- …They got engaged. Victor really is going to marry him….I’m not even surprised at this point. Fine. Keep him Japanese Yuri. He’s a pain in the ass anyway.

Episode Eleven

-  YES! I AM A PROUD DAD/COACH! HAPPIEST I’VE BEEN THIS WHOLE YEAR

Episode Twelve

- WTF? You’re coming back now? Idek what’s going on anymore.

- Well done Yuri! I’m so proud of you for winning gold!

- …They are doing a super romantic pairs skate because of course they are.

- Okay so Victor is coming back to Russia to train cool….wait what do you mean you’re still going to coach Japanese Yuri? WTF? HOW WOULD THAT EVEN WORK? WTF NO.

Post Episode Twelve

- STOP FLIRTING IN THE RINK! WHY GOD WHY AM I BEING PUNISHED?

- STOP GROPING HIM VICTOR THERE ARE CHILDREN PRESENT

-  YURI P STOP THROWING THINGS EVERY TIME THEY FLIRT

-  I HATE ALL OF MY CHILDREN SO MUCH.

- YOU’RE ALL THE REASON I HAVE NO HAIR

Pray for Yakov

  • steve: you wrote about me
  • bucky: I don't know what you're talking about
  • steve: you pulled me out of the river
  • bucky: idk why I did that
  • steve: you nearly killed tony because he hurt me. you actually roared like an angry pigeon or something
  • bucky: I don't like him
  • steve: you tried to pull me behind the shield when I was covering you with it
  • bucky: I didn't mean to do that
  • steve: you remembered my shoes and the hotdogs but not that girls name
  • bucky: I have memory problems that's all
  • steve: you left our dates because I ran off, didn't even apologize
  • bucky: your date would've wondered where you went, I found you for her
  • steve: you lied and told me you only knew me because of the smithsonian because you wanted to protect me, to make me go
  • bucky: blame the brochure
  • steve: you made me share an apartment with you
  • bucky: I needed someone to do the dishes
  • steve: you kept my picture
  • bucky: memory problems remember?
  • steve: you didn't like it when I kissed sharon, I can tell your fake smile from your real one
  • bucky: you were wasting valuable time
  • steve: you put yourself back into cryo so I'd stop being reckless and not become a criminal just to keep you
  • bucky: I was tired
  • steve: you made a vow, told me you'd be with me until death
  • bucky: idk why I did that
  • steve: you interrupted my moment with peggy because you were jealous
  • bucky: you deserved applause and attention for your bravery
  • steve: you fell from the train because you were protecting me
  • bucky: wasn't my smartest move
  • steve: you gave me heart eyes at the bar in '43
  • bucky: I was drunk
  • steve: we shared money and everything else like...a couple
  • bucky: it was convenient
  • steve: you're in love with me
  • bucky: yes
  • steve: what
  • bucky: what
send ‘😢’ for a randomly generated starter/drabble from 72 angst prompts

Triggers such as Suicide, Self Harm, Death, Addiction, Drugs, Alcohol, Murder, Assault, Abuse, and injury. Some prompts are fluffier/lighter than others. Some are very dark.

If the generated prompt is a speech text / dialogue, then you decide who is saying it ( your muse or my muse )

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If Destiel is not real, tell me :

1. Why sparks literally flew the first time they met?
2. Why Cas, an angel who doesn’t understand humans, but saw through Dean’s self deprecating bullshit in about 0.5 seconds of meeting him?
3. “Castiel, he’s not here. That’s his weakness, he likes you.”
4. Why the intense eyesex is not present between anybody than Dean and Cas?
5. Why does Cas not have the personal space issue with anybody other than Dean?
6.“I can’t just call Cas, it’s not like the guy lives in my ass.” “I was never in your -”
7. Why Dean and Cas’ “profound bond” is not the same as Sam and Dean’s relationship, if Dean and Cas are also supposed to be brothers?
8. Why Cas didn’t betray heaven for humanity, or the Winchesters, but for Dean specifically?
9. If they’re supposed to be Best bros 5eva™ (which Sam and Dean already are), why does Dean have such a different reaction to losing Sam and Cas?
10. If Cas pulled both Sam and Dean out of hell, why did he only leave a handprint on Dean?
11. Why did Lucifer go to Nick under the guise of his wife, to Sam under the guise of Jessica ie: their significant others, and to Cas as Dean?
12. Why did Dean canonically say that he never had nightmares, but he had awful nightmares about Cas dying?
13. Why would he prefer to deal with the guilt of having failed Cas, rather than thinking his angel didn’t need him?
14. Why would they rather “have each other, cursed or not”?
15. Why did Dean tell Anna that “Our last night on Earth” was his best line , and then he used it on Cas?
16. Why did Dean make Cas a mixtape, when he knows the significance
17. Why did Godstiel not kill Dean during the “What a brave little ant you are” moment?
18. Why did a simple “I need you” from Dean break Naomi’s hold over Cas?
19.Why does Cas constantly keep choosing Dean over heaven and the angels?
20. Why was his death an exact parallel to Jessica’s death? (Dean restraining Sam, while Sam tries to get to Jessica)
21. Why TV tropes rated Destiel as using 67% romantic tropes while Sam and Dean used 2%
22. “You must have me confused for the other angel, the one in the dirty trenchcoat who’s in love with you.”
23. “Go ask him (Cas), he was your boyfriend first.”
24. In S12, when Cas said I love you,, why did the camera cut to Dean?
25. How is it not heteronormativity that all of the above happened, and they’re still “really good friends”, but if one of them was a girl, it would’ve been acknowledged on screen seven seasons ago?

Feel free to add more points if you reblog!

Bucky adjusting to the modern world would include... (Headcanon)

Request: NOT REQUESTED.

Summary: You help Bucky Barnes adjust to the modern world and it’s adorable.

Word count: 463

Warnings: None

A/N: Bucky Barnes will be the death of me.

Masterlist

Originally posted by marvel-dirtbag

Visiting numerous museums where he could read about himself and the good life he lived
Little kids gazing in awe at Bucky as they innocently touch his metal arm and bombard him with questions about his life
Kid: “Mr Bucky, Sir, what was the war like?”
Kid: “How did you survive the fall?”
Kid: “Why did you kill lots of people?”
Bucky becoming anxious because he isn’t able to handle and/or answer all their questions
Having to take over and steer Bucky away from the growing crowd as he starts to break down
Bucky constantly feeling bad that you have to go home early because of his anxiety.
You: “Buck, let’s get home. I only wanted to see the parts about you anyway.”
Spending hours in department stores as Bucky marvels at all of the new technology
Bucky walking around the shop with an abundance of VERY expensive items in his arms so he can show them to you
Worker: “Sir, if you wouldn’t mind putting those items down.”
Bucky constantly receiving dirty looks from shop assistants as he touches everything a little too roughly
Worker: “Sir, please put that down! Oh lord…. Security!?!”
Bucky managing to rip security wires tied to expensive products wayyyyy too many times
Having to desperately explain to the police he didn’t try and steal the £10,000 product, he was just looking
You: “Officer, look it’s not that big of a deal, I’m sure it happens all the time”
Policeman: “Not. Once.”
Setting up Snapchat for Bucky
Walking into the kitchen every day and finding Bucky and Steve going through all of the filters
Bucky whipping out the dog filter at every inappropriate moment
Bucky arguing with Tony about how he’s still masculine despite wanting to look like an adorable puppy 99.9% of the time
Bucky: “At least I don’t hide in a tin can!”
Tony: “At least magnets don’t attach themselves to my arm when I open the fridge because there’s certainly nothing ‘manly’ about that either!”
Bucky loving to go to aquariums
Bucky: “Y/N! Y/N!!! Look at the colourful fish! Y/N you’re not looking at the pretty fish!”
Bucky freaking out when you tell him you’ve organised a trip to an aquarium where he can feed the sharks
You: “Bucky! Don’t lean in so far! Sharks still bite in the 21st century!”
Buck freaking out, even more, when you organise an outing at the zoo where he’ll be able to feed the penguins
Bucky: “You’re joking, right? Penguins! OMP.”
You: “It’s 'OMG’, Bucky.”
Bucky: “Oh no, I meant Oh My Penguins, I’m hoping it’ll catch on!”
Bucky wanting to constantly to go back and see the penguins
Bucky: “Can we buy one?”
You: “No, Bucky they live in zoos.”
Bucky: “Can we buy a zoo then?”


A/N: REQUESTS ARE OPEN and constructive criticism is appreciated!

The witch’s word rang through Sam’s mind as he listened to his brother talk about their latest hunt.

“…but the spell didn’t affect me, so I managed to run out, grabbed some witch killing bullets and ganked the bitch.”

Mary nodded. “Good job. But why didn’t the spell work on you and did on Sam?”

Dean shrugged and gulped down the rest of his beer. “Who knows? Dumb luck probably.”

Sam stared at his clasped hands at the table, refusing to look at either of them. Maybe he should have told Dean?

“Sam?” Mary asked and Sam could hear suspicion in her voice. She was good.

“What?” Sam tried to ask casually, but judging by the way Dean’s eyebrows furrowed as he peered at him, he did a poor job.

“Sammy? You’ve got something to share with the rest of the class?”

Sam let out an exasperated sigh and raised his hands as he yelled out, “The spell doesn’t work when a person is already in love with someone!”

The bang of his hands lowering to the table again was the last sound heard, prolonged silence stretching over them. Mary raised her eyebrows questioningly, but didn’t comment on the revelation.

When Sam dared to look at Dean, he expected anger, but instead he saw his brother fighting a smile and looking shyly - shyly! - at the table.

Dean finally looked up and grinned. “Looks like Cas always saves the day.”

2

Okay, you see this? These are jacket cover/inside cover of a book called “The Beast Within” written by Serena Valentino, who wrote other Disney books that are so amazing. I purchased her first Disney book in the Germany Pavilion in Epcot a few years ago and have bought every other book of hers since. But lemme tell you why this one is my favorite:

Not only is “Beauty and the Beast” one of my favorite films of all time, but the Beast is one of my favorite characters in any film. And this book makes him seem so much more understandable. It’s written in his perspective and there’s literally a scene where he’s so close to being an actual monster that he goes out to kill Belle after she runs away from him.

Did you hear me?

HE GOES TO KILL BELLE.

Of course, he fights the wolves that attack her because in his mind, he’s like “wait I can redeem my human status still” while the beast side is literally chanting “RIP THE FLESH OPEN AND SPILL HER BLOOD EVERYWHERE ALL OVER THE SNOW COVERED GROUND”.

Let me tell you, this book is so good. And it gives more backstory to Gaston (who is, as you guessed, one of my favorite Disney villains).

If you enjoyed the 2017 version of “Beauty and the Beast”, you’ll enjoy this book. It’s different than the film, but just as good, in my opinion.

burningocean  asked:

Top 5 Soukoku moments ? 😎

Hi Ann, look at what you’ve done. Thank you for the pain. 

1. “I used Corruption because I trusted you”. All this scene is sort of heartbreaking. Chuuya trusts Dazai so much it physically pains me. He hasn’t used Corruption in FOUR YEARS, and then Dazai comes and says “let’s do it like the old times” / “yes, why not, I’ll just put my life in your hands like I did countless of times despite the fact that you betrayed me and I haven’t heard from you in FOUR FRIGGING YEARS and I could literally die in front of your eyes”. WHO DOES THAT????????? Chuuya Nakahara, apparently. That being said, I can’t believe my favorite skk moment is also the moment that makes me raging THE MOST. Of course I’m still outrageously bitter because Dazai literally called him partner, folded his clothes (yes, I’m bringing back the vintage receipts here), washed his face from the blood and then…left him there??? WHAT THE FUCK DAZAI???

2. When they pull the power couple aesthetic. When they actually work together as a team, they are mesmerizing to watch. You can see that the roots of their partnership are still there, that they know each other so much that sometimes they don’t even need words to communicate. They are not Soukoku for nothing, after all. 

Originally posted by princelelouchs

Originally posted by nikforovs

3. When Chuuya fake killed Dazai (aka, Soukoku in a nutshell). Ah this is such a powerful moment, the cherry on top of a scene where Dazai did everything he could to push Chuuya on the verge of murder, just to see him almost doing it. I can’t help but think how liberating this gesture must have been for Chuuya, he finally let out a little bit of his frustration (that’s why he was there in the first place. After four years he’s still bugged by him, he still wants some sort of revenge, he still needs a closure Dazai is not willing to give him). But that’s it. You can say you’ll kill him all you want, my little Chuuya, but will you really? I don’t think so, because you care and love him so much it’s almost painful to watch. And if you, Dazai, could stop toying with him every chance you get, I’d really appreciate it. Thank you very much.

4. Every time Dazai reminds Chuuya that he knows everything about him. Tell us more about those moves and those thrusts Dazai, we’re all ears. 

5. DORKS. First of all, I want Dazai saying “CHUUUYAAAAAA” as the sound people hear passing next to my grave. Second. I feel so robbed because in the manga Dazai actually laugh his ass off at Chuuya’s “little rich girl” impression. 

Originally posted by seieiryu

Originally posted by zoemichaelisphantomhive

- bonus: all the official art involving them is a blessing sent from the gods, I think that Bones ships them as much as we do if not more (remember the park date one? HONESTLY). But there’s one that has has a special place in my heart:

LISTEN. L I S T E N. I could talk about this art literally for two days straight because ??? You can try to convince me all you want, but this is made to be somehow romantic. Look at the way Dazai is tilting his chin up, it looks like he’s waiting for a kiss. And Chuuya is looking in our direction but if he was to look down he’ll be right above Dazai’s lips and ???? WHAT THE FUCK??? Not to mention what’s probably the most fucked up thing here that is THE FLOWERS. It’s a Camellia Japonica, or Japanese Quince, and they are the symbol of love, temptation, passion and deep desire. That’s it y’all. I’m out. I don’t even know what to say anymore. Soukoku might not be canon, but sure as hell they are baiting it…a lot. 

Thank you for your message!

Ask me my top 5 things!

Canoodling - Jughead Jones

So after watching episode 2 of Riverdale I was wondering if I could have a Jughead imagine? Where you’re secretly dating because you’re considered popular and basically kiss him in front of “the popular” people to stop them from thinking Jughead isn’t getting laid? Thanks!

imagine please? defending jughead when reggie teases him, probably?

Originally posted by mieczyslwstilinski


I kind of combined the two of these things…I hope you two are okay with that…I really enjoyed writing it.  I kinda changed the order of events, in the episode, a bit and I hope that’s okay. I don’t even know what that ending is…

You were walking down the halls of Riverdale High School when you felt a tug on your hand and was pulled inside the storage closet. The door shut behind you quickly, but not before there was still enough light to see the outline of an all too familiar hat.

“We really must stop meeting like this.” Despite the darkness, you could almost see the glint in Jughead’s smile as he said the line. You pulled on the light string hanging from the ceiling and found yourself nearly chest to chest with your boyfriend. “You dork,” you said while rolling your eyes. He smiled at you and despite the recent light of events, you felt happy. Jughead grabbed your hand in both of his, running his fingers over your knuckles. “Do you wanna stay after school for the game?” His gaze lifted from your hands to your eyes and you saw them sparkle. “Of course. How’d everything go with Archie?” He shrugged in response, “Good, hopefully it’ll get better after the game.” You nodded, leaning upwards to pressed a quick kiss to his cheek. “I’m going to be late,” you started to pull away, “I’ll see you after school in the lounge, Okay?” He gave your hand one last squeeze, “See ya later, Y/N.” You shot him another smile and quickly darted out of the closet. When back in the hallway, you looked around and sighed in relief that nobody saw you sneak out of hiding. It wasn’t because you were ashamed of dating Jughead, granted you were somewhat popular amongst your peers; it was because you and Jughead both found value in privacy. It was nobody else’s business what you got up to in your freetime and Jughead simply didn’t care about your peers to tell anyone that you two were dating. It was troublesome sneaking around, but moments like those where it was just you two alone, even briefly, were the moments you looked forward to the most.


When the final bell rang, you made your way towards the lounge. You figured that Jughead would already be there, in an attempt to find a spot before it filled up with cheerleaders and loud jocks. Your guess was correct because, when you walked in, your eyes landed on him. He was leaning against the wall, arms crossed on his chest, and scowling at the people before him. When he saw you, he gave you a quick smile that you returned. In order to avoid suspicion, you walked over to greet a few of the jocks and fell into conversation with Veronica.

You almost were having a good time when Reggie, a cocky football player, started to talk about Jason Blossom’s murder, instantly killing the mood. “If someone here did kill him, it couldn’t have been a jock. No, it would be the lonely, sad internet troll, that’s too busy typing manifestos to get laid.” You looked up and saw Reggie staring at Jughead as if in question. “Like Jughead.” The others started laughing, except for you and Archie. Anger burned in your heart, but you couldn’t defend your boyfriend with making it obvious. Then again, if you weren’t going to stand up for him, why were you dating him? You stood up with purpose, walking towards your boyfriend. He raised his eyebrows but you simply leaned forward and pressed your lips to his. Howls and whistles were let out by half the people in the lounge. You pulled back, because if you didn’t, you were sure you wouldn’t be able to stop. “You’ve gotta be kidding me, really Y/N, he’s why you wouldn’t date me?” Reggie yelled and you spun on your heels to face the football player. “Damn right he’s why,” you yelled back, “he’s not a dick that picks on others like yourself!” Everybody hollered and ‘oohed’ at your words. Then Veronica finally spoke up,  “So it looks like he’s getting laid after all,” you let out a laugh and grabbed Jughead’s hand in yours.

“But that doesn’t change anything! He still probably killed him.” Reggie shouted, trying to regain his high-ground. “Did you, ya know, do anything to the body? Like, after?” he asked, pressing Jughead further. You felt a sense of pride when Jughead answered, “It’s called necrophilia Reggie, can you spell it?” A smile crept up on your features, as you turned to Jughead. Suddenly, Reggie darted towards him, but Archie lunged forward in defense. “Shut the Hell up, Reggie.” Archie hissed, but Reggie wasn’t having it. Soon a fight broke out and it ended with Archie getting punched in the face, along with a teacher escorting Reggie out of the room.

You and Jughead decided it was probably best to get out of the school, so you started to make your way to his place. The walk was quiet, with neither of you willing to talk about what had happened yet. Before you knew it, you both turned into the driveway to his house  and walked inside. You both set your bags down and Jughead made a beeline to the kitchen. “Where are your parents?” You asked as you started to take off your shoes. “I found a note that said they were out shopping.” Jughead yelled across the house. You walked into the kitchen where Jughead was head-first in the refrigerator. You let out a giggle at the site, causing Jughead to face you. “What’s so funny?” You felt a blush rise to your cheeks and you lifted yourself to sit on the countertop, “You.” He walked towards you, standing in between your legs. He stared at you as you wrapped your arms over his shoulders and brought him closer. He leaned forward and brought his lips to yours, his hand reaching up to cup your jaw. Your hand pulled his hat off his head and with the other, your fingers buried themselves in his hair. You leaned back slightly pressing a sweet kiss to his cheek.

“You want this back?” You asked, teasingly holding his hat by your fingertip. He smiled, leaning in once more, capturing your lips in another playful kiss. When you were distracted, he took the opportunity to snag his hat back. “Hey,” you said, pulling away from him. He let out a smug chuckle. “Thanks for that,” Jughead said, turning back to the search for food in the cabinets. “For what?” You asked, hopping down from the counter. He turned and gave you a pointed look, “Putting Reggie in his place.”

“He needed to be proved wrong.” He smiled at you, “So you were simply proving him wrong?” You nodded and he stepped closer to you. His hands rested on your hips, pulling you closer, “So you’re okay with canoodling at school now?” You let out a small laugh, “Canoodling? No, but acting like a couple, of course.” His green eyes sparkled at your answer, and he pressed a kiss to your lips. When you backed away you smiled, “Are you going to write this in your novel?” He smiled back with mischief gleaming in his eyes, “Maybe I will.”

anonymous asked:

Also....I have one more. What about assassin andrew being sent to kill neil but falls in love instead au ❤❤❤

Mostly, Andrew Minyard slits his marks’ throats. One clean slice on the side, a severed carotid artery, blood flow to the brain cut off. A quick death. Not out of mercy, but out of necessity—cutting major veins is too messy, and severing a windpipe is too slow.

So Andrew Minyard goes for the carotid arteries. Mostly.

Neil turns to the next page in the folder. Some of Minyard’s earlier victims were strangled to death. A few have been shot, though likely as a last resort—police reports mention signs of a struggle, bullets in the back of the head like they were trying to get away.

Well, “victims” is a subjective term. Implies faultlessness. Innocence. Andrew Minyard’s victims are never faultless or innocent. Before the Moriyamas hired him, Andrew Minyard operated like a vicious Robin Hood, or a Batman-for-pay, taking relatively small fees to rid real victims of their abusers.

And now he’s after Neil.

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