why are you even in my apartment

  • what she says: i'm fine
  • what she means: so the boys come up to my apartment and i'm wearing a robe. i'm ONLY wearing a robe. and i say "why don't you come into my boudoir and watch me do a monologue?" and they say "where's the bed" and i say "this is the bed right here" and they say "can we sit on the bed?" and i say "sure but these are expensive japanese linen" and they say "but they're not even soft." and i say, "sometimes, things that are expensive...are worse."

So the boys come into my apartment and I’m wearing a robe. I’m only wearing a robe. And I say “why don’t you come up to my boudoir and watch me to a monologue?” and they say “where’s the bed?” and I say “this is the bed right here” and they say “can we sit on the bed” and I say “sure but these are expensive Japanese linen” and they say “but they’re not even soft” and I say “sometimes… things that are expensive….. are worse”

  • them: what are you thinking about
  • me, in my head: so the boys come up to my apartment and i'm wearing a robe. i'm ONLY wearing a robe. and i say "why don't you come into my boudoir and watch me do a monologue?" and they say "where's the bed" and i say "this is the bed right here" and they say "can we sit on the bed?" and i say "sure but these are expensive japanese linen" and they say "but they're not even soft." and i say, "sometimes, things that are expensive...are worse."
  • me: nothing

psychic: *reads my mind*
my brain: so the boys come up to my apartment and i’m wearing a robe. i’m ONLY wearing a robe. and i say “why don’t you come into my boudoir and watch me do a monologue?” and they say “where’s the bed” and i say “this is the bed right here” and they say “can we sit on the bed?” and i say “sure but these are expensive japanese linen” and they say “but they’re not even soft.” and i say, “sometimes, things that are expensive…are worse.”
psychic: what the fuck

— settle down | (m)

pairing— min yoongi x reader, roommate! yoongi
genre/warnings— smut, angst, fluff, slow buuurrrn, enemies to lovers
words— 14,930

:: summary— An unfortunate event finds you living with the man you practically despise over the summer. However, maybe through a series of fortunate events, you find yourself falling for him…

note— this is a remastered version of the originally story I wrote called ‘and july’ (found here) that I wrote for suho back when I started this blog, albeit slightly (very?) different.

Keep reading

Humans Are Weird

I’m sitting in the mess hall, swirling my spoon through my bowl of frugnarf, when Kap’ka*click*ka (I call him Kap) sits down opposite me.

“Human Monique, greetings.”

“Greetings, Kap. What’s up?” My eyes are still on my bowl.

“I have a most pressing query for you.” He pauses dramatically during which I decide to look up at him. Meeting my gaze sternly, he says, “Are you injured?”

The question throws me. “What?”

“Injured, Human Monique! Are you injured?” The long flabs of skin along his neck flap with his agitation, and I know he’s actually being serious.

“No,” I say firmly. Then, more gently, “Why do you ask?”

Six eyes blink at me before one of his hands reaches to take my right hand, the one not holding the spoon. “You use only one of your fore-appendages. I feared you were concealing an injury,” he explains. “We *click*Ref*click*fer often do this when we wish to deceive others.”

It is in that instant that I understand. Kap’s species is entirely ambidextrous. All seven of their limbs can work apart from the others. The species even has an extra cortex in their brains to allow for this kind of dexterity. (I mean, seven limbs! That also isn’t counting their three legs.)

I smile at him and pull my hand away. “No, Kap. I’m fine. Really. I’m just a Lefty.”

“A what?”

“I’m left-handed. Most humans are either left- or right-hand-dominant. Lefties are less common.”

“You mean to tell me that your entire existence relies solely on one appendage to do everything?”

“Not everything,” I amend, enjoying watching his eyes bulge. “I mean, I type with both hands and I can eat with both hands, but things like writing or firing my rifle, I use my left.”

“You can’t be serious!”

“I’m dead serious! Sure, there are a few humans who are ambidextrous, and you can certainly learn how, but it’s hard work and, frankly, it’s a waste of time.”

“But what happens if your dominant, left hand is cut off by a prif’s pincers? What will you do? We don’t have the technology to replace your dominant, left hand, Human Monique!”

I grin up at him and switch my spoon from my left to my right. “Well, I guess I’ll be a Righty, then,” I say and take a bite.

[ROA]

Hi there! You’re about to witness a whole lot of word dump up ahead so fasten your seat belt, hold on tight, enjoy the ride!

Note: This is an extremely long post 

101 reasons why Jikook/Kookmin is my ultimate OTP
or 101 times Jikook made my heart flutter

1) When Jungkook tries to find reasonable excuses to hold Jimin’s hands (in which he usually succeeds). Example: A decent round of arm wrestling or a hand massage.

2) It’s nice to know Jungkook isn’t the only one who enjoys the occasion; Jimin does too, even comes up with the most absurd idea (like who arm wrestles while sitting 5ft apart? and knowing he will definitely lose?) urm 128 rounds, 128 losses…

3) The way Jimin ruffles Jungkook’s hair, as if to say “You did well, baby. I’m proud of you” or the way Jungkook leans into Jimin’s touch when he pats his hair.

4) When Jimin asked for kisses from Jungkook, but he panicked and jokingly pushed Jimin away, all the while grinning like the shy boy he used to be.

5) The moment Jimin asked for a peck on the cheek on Jungkook’s birthday but Jungkook just smiled at the camera.

6) When Jungkook softly answered “no” when asked by Jimin if he likes his hyung that much. He just couldn’t resist teasing hyung because of how adorable he would look afterward.

(Time frame: 3:45-4:10)

7) The numerous times Jungkook would wait for Jimin even though he keeps on complaining about Jimin’s sloth-like pace.

8) When they strut around the airport or basically anywhere, side by side. Even when others are way ahead they would take their own sweet time.

Backstage…

After fansign…

and of course, at the airport….

9) Jungkook probably feels that it’s a part of his responsibility to make Jimin happy, so more often than not he would try to joke around and comfort the older, even if it means turning himself into a dork.

10) The glistening look in Jungkook’s eyes whenever Jimin talks in interviews. 

11) When Jungkook made Jimin wear a tiara at a fansign and called him princess.

12) The uniformity of Jimin’s Twitter hashtags when Jungkook is there with him. It’s always #JIMIN and #꾹, making it easier for trash like me to find what I’m looking for haha.

13) Jimin and Jungkook being domestic and sharing soggy cereal in one bowl, using one spoon. Also the many times they share drinks and food.

14) “I will sleep here with Jimin” while pointing at the top bunk of the caravan in Bon Voyage , which, for me, strengthens the possibility of them sleeping together in the dorm. Reminds me of this too: “Everyone, Jungkookie cuddles me to sleep”.

15) When Jungkook suddenly stepped in front of Jimin while he’s talking to apply lip balm on his lips. The hyungs’ reactions were gold. They were stuck to one another like glue the whole broadcast and It hit me hard.

16) The times Jimin said “I Love You” to the camera and Jungkook stared at him like he’s the one being confessed. 👣

17) Jungkook knows his limit when he makes fun of Jimin, always being there for his hyung when insecurity gets the better part of him and I think that’s very, very beautiful. 👣

18) It’s OBLIGATORY for me to include We Don’t Talk Anymore cover by JM and JK here. No explanation needed because I’m sure you feel the same way as I do.

19) When Jungkook waited for Jimin to complete the formation during his part in The Rise of Bangtan in Nanjing, then turned to Jimin and serenaded him.

Serenades Jimin…

Turns to fans…

20) Jungkook knows Jimin, remembers every single thing Jimin does better than the man himself. He’s quick to answer things pertaining to Jimin.

21) When Jimin fell down at Taipei airport, Jungkook wasn’t there because he was filming Flower Crew. He joined them a little while later for their Epilogue On Stage. However, on their way back to Korea, Jungkook made sure to stick close to Jimin and walked by his side until they checked in. The fact that Jungkook was there with him made me cry a little./okay lie/

22) When Jimin took a blanket and a soft, fluffy pillow and tucked Jungkook in, and made sure he’s comfortable enough. Also the fact that Jungkook didn’t even bother waking up and sleeping in the room.

23) The amount of times Jungkook and Jimin hang around with each other, usually accompanied by another member.

  • A date
  • Big Bang Concert with Hoseok
  • At the waterpark with Jin

  • Eating Ramen at Hangang with Namjoon

24) “오~갖고 싶다” (Oh, I want you) That iconic moment in Now3 need I say more.

25) When Jimin hung around behind the camera while Jungkook was getting interviewed. 👣

26) When Jungkook squished behind Jimin when Jimin got his photo taken even though he could’ve gone away and NOT be in the camera.(Fancafe content)

27) When Jimin picked up a slice of cake and fed Jungkook in Bon voyage.

28) Jungkook’s way of carrying Jimin up bridal-style during Limbo game still has me feeling some kind of way, and I will not get tired of seeing it, not anytime soon i bet. (Every time it appears on my feed I’ll stare at it for hours)

29) How Jungkook’s ears perk up whenever Jimin says something. He’s extra attentive when it comes to Jimin. I don’t know if Jimin’s melodic voice gets him or what, cause if it is, boy I feel you. Example: Run! BTS in the US, when Jimin screamed “엄마ㅏㅏㅏㅏㅏ~~~~” (mommy~~) because he’s scared of the roller coaster and Jungkook was like “왜?” (why?)

30) When Jimin laughs an octave higher whenever Jungkook does something funny.

31) The way Jimin sat on Jungkook’s lap and how tight Jungkook pressed him against his chest in Summer Package Dubai.

32) Jungkook didn’t bother about the fans’ parents who sat across him because he needed to make his hyung look good and that was all that mattered.

33) After Jungkook hurt his back at Mama, Jimin took care of him at the airport, gently keeping his hand on Jungkook’s back the whole time they were walking.

34) The fact that Jungkook and Jimin monitor each others’ scenes when they’re filming, waiting around and constantly giving support.

35) When Jungkook and Jimin held hands on stage.

36) The No More Dream lift that has changed over the last couple of years.

37) That moment Jimin made siren sound when Hoseok told everyone that his sister liked Jungkook. I find it cute. (Sukira)

38) When Jimin and Jungkook being lovey-dovey at Manila Airport. 👣

39) Jungkook and Jimin still had their own photoshoot even though they’re both paired up with someone else. Also the iconic “Jeomsoon-ah, please be my baby’s mom” by Park Jimin.

40) Jungkook randomly barging in and interrupting Jimin’s vlive and just….the immense amount of flirting and eye-fucking throughout the whole video…caught me off guard. 👣

41) No matter how many times Jungkook messed around with him, Jimin didn’t have the heart to say stop. He couldn’t say no to Jungkook; that’s how soft he is for the maknae. But yea, speaking quite frankly, Jungkook didn’t even try. There are million other ways to piss someone off but what he did? nope, that’s not how you do it,boy haha. (Run BTS spy episode)

42) And it took 0.000001 sec for Jimin to say thank you to Jungkook. Although Jungkook kept telling him he’s handsome, something he rarely does, Jimin still couldn’t catch on;Still became flustered and shy afterward. It made me asdfjkl. (Undercover mission in Japan)

43) I love Jungkook’s determination. Jk’s inner monologue: I have to make Jimin hyung wear this goddamn headband *gets on his back and forces him to wear it*

44) When Jungkook pinched Jimin’s nipple the instant Jimin went in for a hug lol. (Fancafe content)

45) Jungkook and Jimin have no chills when they’re seated together at fansigning events. They pay attention to each other more than they do to their fans. (don’t get me wrong they still love their fans)

46) When Jimin pretended to be mad at Jungkook for not sitting beside him at a fansign, and how Jungkook played along,claiming his current seat was his original seat when it’s not lol.

47) When Jungkook snatched the snack from Hoseok’s hand for himself, but stopped and gave it to Jimin instead when Jimin asked to be fed.

48) The various times Jimin snakes his slightly smaller hands around Jungkook’s waist and shoulder, and sometimes when it seems that Jimin has difficulty standing after putting his hand on Jungkook’s arm, Jungkook would bend to better accommodate him.

look at him tiptoeing…

49) When Jimin back-hugged Jungkook (and kissed his shoulder from what i saw).

50) The cutest nicknames they gave for one another. 👣

Ooops…

Okay pause. I’m afraid I’ll have to break it down into two parts, as seeing how freaking long this has gotten ahaha. Part 2 will be posted really really soon~~~

2

From the April Fools DLC Normal Ending:

“Even if I can never touch you, I know that the feelings we have towards each other can’t be trapped in any dimension.”

I KNEW THAT SOUNDED FAMILIAR. I JUST KNEW. AND I WAS COMPLETELY RIGHT. JUST LOOK AT WHAT HE SAYS IN THE AFTER ENDING.

Now, moving on to my theory.

On Day 7 of Zen’s route, you go over to his house and he brings you to the rooftop to stargaze. I’m sure all of you remember that CG of him staring at the night sky right?

This completely went over my head, but he had said this:

“It’s strange… I feel as if I’ve known you for a long time.

Why do you think that is?

You’re… strange.”

We could look at this as Zen getting confused about his budding feelings for you, but it’s really all about interpretation. Even from the start, we already see mentions of the stars, the sky, and so on.

I mean, look at what he said in his After Ending! Isn’t it weird that he’s suddenly bringing up that no matter FAR APART both of you are, you’ll always think of each other? It’s like he’s linking the skies (or universe, DIMENSIONS) to your distance from each other. I’m assuming that at this point in time, he had felt strange because he just started to realise how unreal (because different dimensions) you were.

I really like to use the argument of his psychic dreams because it’s absolutely fascinating. And again, let’s look at this theory on the basis of the recommended route sequence:

Zen -> Yoosung -> Jaehee -> Jumin -> Seven

What if even in his own ending, he knows he won’t be able to keep you and you’ll just end up moving on? What if he knows that there is in fact distance between the both of you, be it emotionally (because you do all the other routes after him) or literally (because you’re in different dimensions)?

He never fully comes to terms with the whole dimension thing in the main game, but he did in the April Fools DLC. Every single time, no matter what, there’s bound to be distance between the both of you. Does Zen just know this?

We all label Zen as narcissistic but in his route it’s so obvious how insecure he really is, how unconfident he is. He constantly praises you and phrases it in a way that sounds like even he, the MOST BEAUTIFUL MAN IN THE WORLD, doesn’t deserve someone like you. But why is that so?

What if he just has an inkling that the both of you aren’t meant to be? He’s always known there’s something off there. That’s why, at least in my opinion, he shows the most affection throughout those eleven days he has with you. He always lives in the moment when he’s with you, taking care of you, keeping you safe, expressing his love… because he knows that’s the only time he has with you. Maybe he knows it’s unrealistic to think that the both of you will end up staying like that forever.

And you know, after the Seven’s route, Day 10 call you had with him when he confessed that “I could’ve made you happy too.” he doesn’t appear as much anymore. He’s actually the most uninvolved character in the Secret Endings.

Guys, Zen is aware of the distance. Zen is aware that it’s not meant to be. But he does love you. He wants you to know that, but being a gentleman, he chooses to keep his distance too after he sees how happy you are with another person. But you damn well know he’ll be there to support you just like how he does in every route.

I really don’t know if I’ve explained it well enough, but I see a lot of Seven reset theories and not really much on Zen, so here’s my take on it.

To end it off, let me give you Zen’s final lines in the April Fools DLC normal ending:

“I love you, ____.

Let’s be forever.”

———-

PREVIOUS THEORY

Bet On Me

Reggie x Reader

A/N: This is my first ever fic and I hope you all like it!! Requests for all other Riverdale characters are open!! (This is my first fic because Reggie is bae)

Word Count: 3369

Warnings: Swearing, slight angst, violence, heavy make-out session (is that even a warning?)

Summary: Reggie is dared to date Y/N, the sweet and popular untouched cheerleader. He does so, although not expecting to fall for her in the process.

Keep reading

hamilton characters as club penguin bans
  • Washington: Stop screaming children it will be over soon
  • Jefferson to Lafayette: I could kill you right now, no one would hear you scream, I could go back and pretend to be you, they wouldn't even realize you were missing
  • Hercules: Fashion police, you're definitely under arrest
  • Aaron: You're tearing this family apart, god damn why can't you do it right
  • Alexander: 911 what is your emergency, what do you mean you're being murdered, people can't do that.
  • Jefferson: Put it on the menu
  • Alexander: You should jump cos no one likes you lol
  • Angelica: When I see stars I think of you, because you're only beautiful from a distance
  • Peggy: I heard you like the bad penguins, I don't want to brag but, I didn't sign up with my parents permission
  • Alexander: Help I can't swim
  • Angelica: Your point
  • Alexander: I'm drowning
  • Angelica: And I'm reading
  • Hercules: I live a hard life and work a dangerous job, i work as an officer for the fashion police
  • Angelica: That's not a good thing
  • Seabury: Thank you all for coming *no one is there*
  • King George: Have you ever heard of stranger danger
  • Aaron: Girl r u trash bc I want to take you out
  • Alex: I poisoned one of our glasses but I forgot which one
  • John: The way this dinner is going I hope it's mine
  • Madison to Jefferson: What the fuck purple
  • Eliza: Magic mirror, will I ever find love
  • Mirror: Ask again later
  • Alex: I like you
  • Ang: Me?
  • Eliza: No he meant me
  • Hercules: Dora your never going to get there with boots
  • Maria: I'm sensing you're a bit of a bitch
  • Hamilton: Can I pay you in swag
  • Eliza: What the flipper
  • Peggy: Why would you swear like that
  • Maria: Was abandoned, is alone and sad
  • Washington: Locked up because my eyebrow game was to strong
  • Jefferson/Aaron: Smooth as butter
Verses for when you’re feeling unloved and worthless:

“For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.” - Romans 8:38-39

“…may have strength to comprehend with all the saints what is the breadth and length and height and depth, and to know the love of Christ that surpasses knowledge, that you may be filled with all the fullness of God.” - Ephesians 3:18-19

“See what kind of love the Father has given to us, that we should be called children of God; and so we are. The reason why the world does not know us is that it did not know him.” - 1 John 3:1

“For my father and my mother have forsaken me,
   but the Lord will take me in.” - Psalm 27:10

“Are not two sparrows sold for a penny? And not one of them will fall to the ground apart from your Father. But even the hairs of your head are all numbered. Fear not, therefore; you are of more value than many sparrows.” - Matthew 10:29-31

“Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they?” - Matthew 6:26

“For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.” - Jeremiah 29:11

“But now thus says the Lord,
he who created you, O Jacob,
   he who formed you, O Israel:
“Fear not, for I have redeemed you;
   I have called you by name, you are mine.” - Isaiah 43:1

“He who did not spare his own Son but gave him up for us all, how will he not also with him graciously give us all things?” - Romans 8:32 

“I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.
Wonderful are your works;
   my soul knows it very well.” - Psalm 139:14

misdial | pcy

park chanyeol. reader-insert. 5,6k words. fluff/angst. au

—it all started with one misdial, then a second and a third and…

this one is for Sasha @floofyeol

3.12 a.m: missed call from Park Chanyeol

“You called me?” 

“Oh, did I? I’m sorry, it was a misdial.”

“Oh, I see.”

3.14 a.m.: incoming call from Park Chanyeol

“Hello?”

“Actually, I just wanted to hear your voice.”


Keep reading

sakurahonu  asked:

Did no one notice that Mystic messenger is basically the whole "stranger danger"/"don't talk to strangers" thing that we were all told as kids? Only in this games case we followed the stranger and instead of getting kidnapped, we got hot people. I think about this any time there is a fic about the RFA guys as parents. "Daddy/Mommy, how did you meet Mommy/Daddy?" "So I met your mother/father when they logged into an app in an apartment that a stranger led the to......"

OMG hahahaha yes! THIS!!!! 


“How did you and mummy meet?” 

Yoosung: “I… uh… well we were both young and… we… um…. there was this app on the phone she downloaded where she thought she could talk to guys… wait no… I… online? Yes. We met online.” 

Child: “So you met through Tinder?” 

Yoosung (shocked): “Um, Yes! Okay! Let’s go with that!” 


Zen: “What?! Why do you want to know something like that? I… it was just how people met, you know, one of those star crossed fates things that happened that lead your mother and me to meet- that’s all.” 

Child: “So in other words, you don’t want to tell me.” 

Zen: “In other words, yes.” 

Child (to their sibling): “Told you he met Ma at a bar. Probably got her knocked up by accident and here we are.”

Zen: “WHAT?! THAT WAS NOT HOW WE MET AT ALL! IT WAS BEAUTIFUL AND PERFECT AND COMPLETELY NOT APPROPRIATE FOR CHILDREN TO HEAR!” 

Child: “Was the bar Hooters? Is that why it’s inappropriate?” 

Zen: “MC! What the hell have you been telling these children?!” 


Jaehee: “Oh we met under odd circumstances. Your mother did a foolish thing and downloaded an app she wasn’t allowed to but that led her talking to me and that was that.” 

Child: “That’s nice Mama… but how did she get access to the app if she wasn’t allowed to have it?”

Jaehee (sweat drop): “Uh… ask… her about it, Sweetie.” 


Jumin: “Your mother followed her heart to me.”

Child: “That’s it? She just up and came to you out of nowhere?”

Jumin (stoic face): “Yes. Exactly.” 

Child: “That makes no sense Dad-”

Jumin: “No, what makes no sense is that I’m paying for the best tutor in Korea to teach you and you’re still only averaging a B in school-”

Child: “Awww Dad but-”

Jumin: “Don’t but me, I want you to tell me why…” (just relieved he dodged a bullet. Will have to ask advice from MC and the rest of the RFA (bar Zen, bastard will just laugh) about how to proceed. 


Saeyoung: “Well Mummy downloaded a mysterious app that let her speak to a strange man who told her to go to a strangers apartment and enter without permission. There the app started to work and she spoke to five beautiful people, one of them being me- and even though I tried my best to sway her advances, she finally swept me off my feet. After that we overturned not one, but two evil organisations and then came home and had some cake.” 

Child: “If you didn’t want to tell me the story that’s all you had to say Dad.” 


Saeran: “I tried to kidnap her.” 

Child: “You did not.”

Saeran: “I did. I swear. “

Child: “Dad this is pathetic, how did you meet Mum?”

Saeran (calling off to the side): “MC?! Come in here and tell our kid that I tried to kidnap you damn it!” 


V: “I had thought love to be completely out of my reach, and quite literally, out of nowehere- your mother appeared. She was helping us plan for the new RFA party.” 

Child: “Awww so you guys bonded through that whole experience?” 

V: “Mhmm, your mother was just an absolute angel.” (texting under the table to make sure MC corroborates his story to omit certain… details). 

Vodka

This is sorta lame and cheesy, but it’s basically just a fluffy Imagine about Tom being a cute boyfriend and taking care of his drunk girlfriend💗
Author’s Note: This is a oneshot inspired by sorta me? My mom had a party and made a ton of mixed drinks, and because I’m a dumb baby that never drinks, I forgot that vodka literally punches you in a face when you drink too much of it? Anyways, I got drunk and ended up crying to one of my cousins for about 40 minutes about all the reasons why I love Tom? Apparently, I’m even more cheesy and sentimental drunk than I am sober, who knew lol?

Vodka
She giggled to herself, ankles knocking into each other as she braced herself on the door of her apartment. She was absolutely, completely, and undeniably smashed. Truly, she couldn’t even remember how she’d gotten this way, but then again, she could barely recall her uber ride home.
Her hands kept shaking and she couldn’t find the correct key to fit itself into the doorknob. At this rate, she’d be out all night.
Tom paused the film he was watching and glanced back towards the front door. He was pretty sure that he could hear someone out there, but it was probably just their neighbor’s being noisy. Allowing the film to regain his full attention, he did his best to ignore the strange sounds outside, until he heard something that replicated her giggle.
His eyebrows knitted together in confusion. She was supposed to be at a sleepover with her best friends, not coming home at one in the morning? Tom got up and made his way over to the window by the door. Peeking out, he saw that the giggle outside indeed belonged to her, and she appeared to be struggling hugely with the task of opening the door.
Quickly crossing to help her inside, Tom yanked open the door and barely had time to catch her as she crashed in on top of him.
“Tom!” She yelped excitedly, making no effort to move off of him, instead cuddling further into him, while he laid sprawled across the floor with her lying on his chest. “Do you wanna hear a joke? It’s so dirty and I know how you love dirty things!” She explained innocently, her eyelashes tickling his neck.
Tom chuckled, “Darling, come on up here. We’ve gotta close the door.”
“Okay, I’ll tell you!” She leaned over him, “What did Cinderella do when she got to the ball?”
“You’re absolutely wrecked.” Tom laughed, taking in her mussed up appearance. She still looked good, how could she not? Her skirt was just shorter, her breasts were more exposed than she’d be comfortable with sober, and her eyemakeup was slightly smudged. Her hair tumbled down her back in messy waves and she teetered on her high heels.
If she had come home sober, Tom would’ve dragged her off to bed with him, but alas, she was drunk and needed to be taken care of.
“She gagged!” His girlfriend giggled, finishing up the butt of her joke. “Do you get it?”
Tom burst out laughing and cradled the back of her head as he rolled her onto her side so that he could get up to lock the door. “Yes, baby, I do. Where’d you hear that one?”
She didn’t even seem to have registered what he asked her because, in response, she said, “I don’t think I’d be Cinderella if I was a disney princess. She gags, but not me. I don’t gag, unless you make me.”
“Oh my gosh, you’re going to be so embarrassed in the morning.” Tom said, slipping his hands beneath her arms to pick her up. Helping her down the hallway to their bedroom, he asked, “Darling, how come you’re not with your friends right now?”
She blinked her eyes slowly and licked her lips. “We were all talking, and drinking. So, so, so much drinking. Did you know that vodka is strong? Like, it’s so strong, because, I’m not sure if you can tell, but,” She leaned closer to his chest and pressed herself up onto her tippy toes to whisper in his ear, “I’m kinda drunk right now.”
Turning his head towards her, he decided to play along, “Are you serious? I’d had no clue.”
“Well, yes! Anywho,” She dragged out the last letter of anywho before she tripped over herself again.
Tom caught her and slipped a firmer hand around her waist. “Anywho?” He pressed.
“We were all talking about our boyfriends, and how much we love them, because, I love you so much. And then, we started talking about the stuff we do with our boyfriends.” She paused in the hallway to poke Tom’s chest, “That’s my favorite shirt on you.”
“Darling, I’m not wearing a shirt?” Tom said, cocking his head to the side.
“I know,” She smiled, “That’s why it’s my favorite.” She gestured to Tom’s exposed midriff, “This is all great. Like, you look so good. The best.”
Tom dissolved into laughter and shook his head, “My silly, drunk girl. What are we going to do with you?”
“Well, you see, what I’d like you to do with me is make-out. That’s really why I came home. We started talking about some things,” She cupped her hand around Tom’s ear and whispered, “Sexy time things. And we all agreed that I should come home to you so that we could do the sexy time things. Because, I wanna do them, with you.”
Finally crossing the threshold of their bedroom, Tom placed her gently onto the bed and tried to ignore her last statement. Yes, she was his girlfriend. Yes, she’d just told him that she wanted him, and yes, he obviously wanted her too. But, she was drunk, much too drunk to consent to sex with him.
Tonight, Tom would be a good boyfriend and take care of her, but, in the morning, Tom would be a good boyfriend and he’d give her at least 2 orgasms with 2 advil pills to chase away her headache before breakfast.
“Sweet girl, we can’t right now. You’ve been drinking too much, you’re absolutely wasted.” Tom tried to reason with her.
“No, no I’m not. If I was drunk, could I do this?” She took a deep breath, “‘May I feel said he/ (I’ll squeal said she/ just once said he) It’s fun said she/ (May I touch said he/ How much said she/ A lot said he) Why not said she.”
Tom cut her off, “Sweetheart, nothing you say matters right now, you’re too drunk. Now just let me help you out of that dress.” Shaking his head, Tom laughed as he walked over to her with an oversized sweatshirt of his in his hand. Only she would be able to quote E.E. Cummings completely inebriated.
Kneeling in front of her, Tom lifted one of her feet onto his lap to unbuckled her high heeled shoe. Undoing the clasp and carefully removing the heel, he pressed a tender kiss to the top of her foot.
“You know, I like it a lot better when you’re on your knees for a different reason.” She pouted, sitting up to watch him.
Tom chuckled again as he began to remove her other shoe, “Trust me darling, so do I. Roll over-” He didn’t even get to finish his sentence when she interjected.
“Are you gonna spank me?” She asked, rolling over. Her tiny dress had ridden up even more and Tom had to bite down on his lower lip and clasp his hands together to prevent himself from doing just that.
“You’re making this really difficult.” Tom muttered.
“Then do something about it. I thought bad girls got spankings?” She teased him, eyeing the hardness growing within his pajama bottoms.
“Stop it, I’m trying to take care of you and you’re making it really hard.” Tom groaned.
“I can tell,” She giggled.
“For fucks sake,” Tom rolled his eyes, “I’m going to help you out of the dress, and that’s all the touching I’m going to do tonight. Then, I’m going to take off your makeup, and you’re going to go to sleep.”
“Tom,” She whined, wriggling around on the bed, “I don’t wanna. I want you to do me.”
Tom laughed, “You’re going to die in the morning, oh my gosh. You’re such a child.”
“Ugh!” She whined and flattened out onto the mattress.
Sitting down behind her on the bed, Tom rolled her over and unzipped the back of her dress. He did his best to not look, but the zipper kept getting caught in her hair, and he couldn’t ignore the soft skin of her back. He saw that she’d chosen to wear the pretty, light pink, lace bra that she’d been wearing the first time they’d had sex. Groaning over the memories, he helped her rid her body of the confining fabric of her dress and had slid his sweatshirt over her body.
She turned to lay on her back, “Will you at least kiss me?”
“Yes,” Tom placed a soft kiss on her mouth, “Do you wanna get up to go to the bathroom to take off your makeup, or do you want me to do it for you here?”
“Hmmm, here.” She sat up and stuck her hands inside of the sweatshirt, only to toss her bra off seconds later.
Tom’s eye lingered on her chest as he got up to retrieve her makeup wipes.
“I love youuuuu.” She said, hugging herself to his chest after Tom had successfully cleansed her face of all traces of makeup. “You’re my favorite, even though you refuse to fuck me.”
Tom tucked the duvet under her chin and crawled in behind her. He kissed her temple and curled an arm around her, “I love you too darling.”
He prayed to the high heavens above that she wouldn’t feel his excitement poking her in the back while she drifted off and into dreamland.

Deadly Sins- Sloth & Lust

Relationship: Peter Parker x Reader

Summary: Reader is sick causing her not wanting to do anything. Convincing Peter to be lazy with her turns into a heated session.

Warnings: Swearing cause I love swearing IRL. Plus Tom swears too :,)

Dominant Peter is going to be a thing \^.^/

P.S: PETER IS IN HIS 20′S IN THE DEADLY SINS SERIES. BESIDES THE FIRST EPISODE OF ENVY. I DON’T WRITE SMUT ABOUT A 15 Y/O. I KNOW SOME PEOPLE DO BUT I WONT CAUSE THAT CREEPS ME OUT.. SO KNOW HE IS IN HIS 20′S

SWEET IN THE STREETS BUT A FREAK IN THE SHEETS!

YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.

Word Count: 1,815  (Sorry it’s short my migraine is killing me and I can’t look at a screen.. I promise the next Lust post will be 2,000 words )

A/N: BTW these are my interpretations of the sins. Of course for Gluttony I’m not going to have the eat a hella ton of food. You will see my interpretations as my pics are posted :) BTW THE OTHER LUST POST IS IN THE WORKS :,)

[Reader’s POV]

   Comfort. That is all you’re feeling right now. It was one of your favorite feelings. Sadly you couldn’t stay in bed forever which you wished that it was possible. It was unlikely due to the responsibilities you have. This one morning you don’t want to move at all. Your body ached and was sore from training and a night with Peter.

“baby girl,you have to get up..” Peter’s voice making you stir in your peaceful slumber.Your body being shaken lightly.

“Five more minutes…” I mumbled snuggling against the warmth he body produced. He felt so warm and cozy. The warmth lulling you back to sleep.You gladly welcomed sleep till Peter opens his mouth again.

“You have been saying that every time I try and wake you up” his chest moves as he laughs.

“shhhh, just stay with me and we can make up a practice session later.. Please Peter, I’ll make it up to you if you stay with me all day today..”  Your leg moving up to his waist pulling him closer. A whimper slips out as you feel how hard he is. You look up to see his eyes a shade darker. His eyes gazing at your lips, his tongue darting out quickly. His lips crash down onto yours in a passionate kiss pulling your body against his.

“darling, fuck” he groans gripping onto your ass tighter. You slowly push your hips again creating a needy friction.The tight grip he had on you made you moan in his ear.

“P-Peter “ you gasp out as his lips leave a path down your neck. The feeling making your eyes flutter shut. You straddle him feeling his cock press against your clothed core. A whimper escaped your lips as you pressed your hips against his. The rocking motion earns you a slap to your ass. His hand coming down against your ass each time you moved your hips.

“god your ass is so red” he moans gripping your tingling cheek in his hand. His hot breath fans across your neck making you shiver. You begin sucking on the base of his neck. A moan slips from Peter’s lips as you turn his skin red. 

“You’re so sinful it could bring a holy man to his knees… and you darling always bring me to mine” He tears your panties off causing you to frown.

Stupid Spider strength..

“Peterrrr those were my favorite” I pout rolling us over and pushing him off of the bed. A thud signalling he fell onto the floor. His head pops up from the edge of your bed making you laugh. His curls messy making him look cute and sexy.

“I’ll buy you new ones babe” he laughs standing up walking away. Sitting up on my elbows I look at him heading to the door. Is he seriously going to leave you here?

“You’re just going to wake me up, tease me then leave?” My voice coming out flustered. He closes the door locking it ,seeing that made your eyebrow raise. A smirk appears on his lips as he slips off his sweat pants. His Calvin Kleins showing a print of how hard he really was.

“Karen turn on the Don’t Bother Us Program, then you can turn back on when I say so” Peter speaks to the ceiling.

 Your sleeping quarters at the Avengers HQ was styled like an apartment so you and Peter could feel at home. A fancy apartment but it still reminded you of Queens. Tony had windows project sounds and views so it was practically a home away from home.

“Turning on Don’t Bother Us Program,engaging soundproof walls, be safe you two” Karen’s voice then turns off. You hear a beep signaling she was offline.

“You think I was just going to walk out of here to practice, rock hard and leave my girl flustered?” His voice getting lower as his strides bring him to the edge of the bed.Peter’s figure radiated dominance as he looks down at you.

“I-I” You were the stuttering one now. Peter is the one to normally stutter but once in the bedroom hes completely different. It was a good different.

“I told you that you could bring a man to his knees,that only man will be me” Peter’s hands grip your thighs pulling you to the edge.My skin felt like heat and fire under his palms. Your chest rising and falling slowly. He spreads your legs lowering himself down to his knees. The eye contact between you two not breaking at all.

“P-Peter..” his name coming out as a gasp. Feeling his tongue slowly licking between your folds. His thumb starts rubbing your clit in small circles. A loud moan comes out from the sensation. His thumb is then replaced by his tongue as he inserts fingers inside of you. Your nails dig into the sheets as you look down at him pleasing you.

“C’mon babygirl, tell me what you want” His hot breath fanning across your core.

 Feeling your stomach tightening as his tongue flicks faster. Arching your back as the pleasure travels in your body. He slid another finger in as your thoughts started jumbling together. Curling his fingers inside you hitting your g-spot when he makes a come hither motion.

“M-more please , I want your cock inside me Peter” you beg as your legs started to twitch. Desperation clear in your voice. The look in his eyes making you on the edge about to cum.

   Flicking his free wrist his web shooter expands onto his hand. A web pinning both your hands to the headboard. His chest rose and fell quicker as he gazed at your body. You looked helpless tied up to the headboard. A groan coming from him as you spread your legs , inviting him to you. You wanted him more than ever.

“How bad do you need it” He smirks crawling onto the bed. Your eyes screwed shut while his hand slid up your legs. His hips lowering down towards where you needed him most.

“S-so bad Peter, please baby” you manage to moan out as his lips pressing kisses in between your breasts. Slowly moving back up to your neck. You gasp as he slams into you without warning. The feeling of him inside you causes you to bite our lip.

Peter’s lets out a low moan tilting his head back. All you wanted to do was to touch him but you were restrained. Peter’s hands dug into your hips as his pace started to pick up. Uncontrollable moans came out of your mouth. He filled you up just right making you pant out his name.

Peter!”

“Look at how your tits bounce as I fuck you” His head tilting back, his veins in his neck showing. Holy fuck. You feel his hands move as he angles your hips up. The new angle making a loud moan come out,he went even deeper hitting the right spot. Grunts coming from him as he continued to pound into your dripping pussy. Thank god for the sound proof walls, you were loud when it came to expressing the pleasure you received. Peter loved hearing you thats why he had the system installed.

“P-Peter untie me please I w-want to touch you” your voice coming out as a whisper. You felt out of breath as you looked down. Watching as he filled you up with each thrust.

“I love seeing you like this “ he whispers running his finger down your chest and down your body. Your breath hitching in your throat.

“Under my control, only I can give you pleasure like this..” he whispers as his thrust becoming slower. Panting you try to rip his webs apart with your nails. All you want to do is touch him and run your fingers through his soft curls.

“You can’t get away from me,you wanna know why?” he grins cockily. Bastard knows his new web formula is tougher. His body gets closer to you if that’s even possible. Feeling your hands become free your hand grips onto his curls. The other scratching down his back. He hisses from the pain as your nails dig into his skin.

“Cause you’re my girl” his hand cups your cheek as he thrusts into you harder causing your head to hit the headboard.

“You’re mine, you got that princess?” His hips slam into you harder and harder. Nodding as a reply you keep eye contact with him. The pleasure feeling so intense you felt like you were going to burst.

Peter tugs on your hair letting out a low growl. “Let me hear that pretty voice, answer me” he demands kissing your jaw in fiery kisses.

“I’m y-yours Peter, please let me cum” your moans and whimpers filled the air as he reached between you rubbing your clit in fast circles.

“C’mon darling, cum for me cum all over my cock” Moans come out of his mouth as his thrusts start to get sloppy. The stamina he had in him had you breathless. Your orgasm causes you to hold tightly onto Peter. Your legs trembling as it coursed through you. Him filling you with his load shortly after, collapsing on top of your body.

     Peter rolls over pulling your body next to his. Your chest was falling up and down. Both of you were panting trying to catch your breath. Your body could just melt into the mattress,exhaustion taking over you.

“Karen, please start the shower and play some AC/DC for me” Peter speaks up a bit due to his voice being shaky from his breathing.

Turning on the shower, Peter you lasted a lot longer than you did the last time should we mark it as your new record?” Karen asks waiting for a response.

He was keeping track of how long he could last?

Peter Benjamin Parker” you sit up looking at your boyfriend. His cheeks turning pink as he sits up.

“Babygirl I-“

“You’re seriously keeping track?” You laugh placing your head in your hands. He is such a dork.

“Y-You’re not mad?” He questions tilting your chin up.

“Now I want to see how fast I can make you cum and start my own record” you grin sitting up heading toward the bathroom.

“I already have a record for how fast I can” Peter stands crossing his arms over his chest with a grin.

“Looks like I have to beat you, next time who ever loses has to clean the training rooms next week” you challenge looking back at him.

“Oh it’s so on, you’re going to cum and beg for me like always” he lifts you over his shoulder towards the shower.

“PETER!” You scream out as he starts to tickle your sides. From serious to childish, what a catch.

Peter is sweet in the street but a freak in the sheets.©

Flirt (Intro)

intro one two three four
genre:
fuckboy!jungkook, college!au, smut?, angst?
words: 1.9k
member: jungkook (ft. taehyung)

despising jeon jungkook as he hooks up and steals your best friend away from you. 

(credits to gif owner for the gif that kills all)

Originally posted by bangtanofarmys

Jeon Jungkook.

The man who every girl on campus had an eye on, along with his crew of other fuckboys. He would show up on campus with different girls everytime, wrapping their arms around his frame, “claiming him”.

You despised him though, because his next target was your best friend.

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Skyline {III}

Originally posted by coolbackflips

Warnings: Blood

Pairing: Peter Parker x reader

Word Count: 3.2k

A/N: You guys!!!!  I can’t believe you are all so nice honestly!!!!  I hit 500 followers today so as a thank you, here is pt. 3 a day earlier than expected!!  Forgive me if there are any mistakes, as I stayed up late to finish it (I have to be up in six hours for work oh lord) and I really hope you guys like it.  There most definitely will be a pt. 4, and possibly pt. 5, as this scene became longer than expected, and I decided to split it between two chapters.  Again, thank you so much, guys.  All my love.

{part I} {part II}

As the end of August neared, you began to fear the return of school.  Not because you hated it—in fact, you were fond of school.  You liked learning, you liked seeing your friends from certain classes, and you even missed some of your teachers. However, with the return of your school came the return of Spider-Man’s school.  He had explained to you how difficult it was to balance the responsibilities of his civilian life with the responsibilities of being a superhero. Between those tightropes of time management, you doubted there would be any hours allotted to visiting you.

You knew that you had no right to be sad about your predicament.  The right thing to do would be to not think selfishly, and just be happy with the time you were given with someone who doesn’t normally share their world. But, no matter how many times you had a talk with yourself, you still couldn’t bring yourself out of your melancholy thoughts.

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Let Me Show You Why

Thank you @joeynihil for letting me use the Cody gif :D

Summery: Brett goes out of his way to make you blush or shy but he goes too far.

Warnings: sex, 18+ gif under cut


“Brett’s coming?” You asked when your friend finished listing off the people she’d invited.

“It’s a party to celebrate the team winning all their games so far… why wouldn’t I invite Brett?” She asked, glancing at you in the mirror as she put her makeup on, frowning when she looked over the jeans and t-shirt you were wearing.

“Well… because he’s kind of a jerk.” You mumbled, playing with your fingers as you scuffed your feet on the foot of her bed.

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allirica  asked:

sterek + "why are you knocking on my door at 4am"

GOD BLESS YOU <3 

Stiles awakes with a start, his heart pounding almost as loud as the person who is pounding at his door.

“Coming,” he mumbles, not even thinking that hey maybe he shouldn’t be answering his door in the middle of the night? That’s how scary movies start, isn’t it?

Well, it’s too late because he is already opening his apartment door to find Derek standing there with his blue eyes glowing.

“Dude,” is all Stiles can muster. He glances down at his smart watch and sees the time. “Why are you knocking on my door at 4am?”

Derek takes a deep breath, trying to control himself, but now hair is sprouting from his cheeks, and Stiles can’t have any of his neighbors see, so he grabs Derek’s arm and pulls him into the apartment.

“What’s going on?” Stiles asks. It’s been relatively quiet for Stiles since he moved to New York, and it’s not unusual for Derek to be in his apartment but at 4am? That’s a bit unusual. It has Stiles’ anxiety spiked.

Derek shakes his head. “I shouldn’t be here.”

“Dude,” Stiles says again, squeezing Derek’s arm where he still has a hold on it. “Talk to me.”

Derek takes another deep breath and the hair on his cheeks begins to disappear. “I got a whiff of a scent,” Derek finally says.

This puts Stiles on alert. “What scent? Do we know what we’re fighting yet? I can get my baseball bat.”

Before Stiles even takes a step back, Derek is grabbing his hand and keeping him where he is. “It was nothing. Probably. I caught a whiff of Kate’s perfume.”

Stiles stops breathing as he stares at Derek, who won’t look back at him. Derek’s shoulders are hunched, his head ducked. There’s an overwhelming urge to protect Derek in Stiles, and the first thing he can think to do is hug Derek. So he does.

He holds on tight, putting a hand on the back of his neck. Derek buries his face in Stiles’ neck and takes a deep breath.

“Thank you,” Derek whispers.

“Anytime,” Stiles tells him, and he means it.

Neighbour AU

There are three certainties in life: death, taxes, and Laurent’s neighbours having a loud argument every weekend. Laurent does not pay an exorbitant amount of rent just so that he can be woken up at three in the morning every Saturday because Jokaste is angry at Damen again. It’s bad enough that he knows their names without having ever introduced himself.

And of course, the fights are always followed by even louder make-up sex, as if he needs a weekly reminder that he himself isn’t getting any.

Tonight, it seems, Damen has been locked out of his apartment.

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