why are you allowed to exist

Here’s the thing about people with good hearts. They give you excuses when you don’t explain yourself. They accept apologies you don’t give. They see the best in you when you don’t need them to. At your worst, they lift you up, even if it means putting their priorities aside. The word “busy” does not exist in their dictionary. They make time, even when you don’t. And you wonder why they’re the most sensitive people. You wonder why they’re the most caring people. You wonder why they are willing to give so much of themselves with no expectation in return. You wonder why their existence is not so essential to your well-being. It’s because they don’t make you work hard for the attention they give you. They accept the love they think they’ve earned and you accept the love you think you’re entitled to. Let me tell you something. Fear the day when a good heart gives up on you. Our skies don’t become gray out of no where. Our sunshine does not allow the darkness to take over for no reason. A heart does not turn cold unless it’s been treated with coldness for a while.

-Najwa Zabian

“We need a cure for autism!”

Well you will never get it, no matter your stance on the subject. Autism is likely genetic and studies show that by six months of age there are already detectable changes in the brain that predict an autism diagnosis later in life. So even though we don’t know what autism is, it’s definitely something you’re born with and it is impossible to change that after the baby is born. Nothing will ever turn an autistic person who is alive into an allistic person. You can’t rewrite their entire brain anatomy.

So why do Autism Speaks talk of “the cure”? What they mean by cure is prenatal screening that will allow parents to abort fetuses with certain traits or genes. It means stopping autistic people from being born. It means getting rid of us even before a fetus develops a brain. It means that from their point of view not ever being alive (so essentially death) is better than existence as an autistic person.

That’s what you are saying when you’re advocating for a cure. “I wish you were never born”. “I wish your parents would have aborted you before you developed into a person”. “I think your existence is worse than death”. “I think you would be better off dead”. That is your message. That is your opinion.

Think about that next time you talk about a cure for autism.

So I have been checking up discussions from last year about Santa Claus being Black and how much of an unnecessary controversy it caused and it got me thinking, does the public even know if Batman was white or do people just assume he is? cuz lets be real, the man is covered from head to toe and only appear at nights, that’s not enough to know someone ethnicity so what if every kid in Gotham believe that Batman is the same race as them and will not allow someone to tell them otherwise?

.

White kid: But why do you think Batman is black?!

Black kid: Why do you think he isn’t?

White kid: Why? have you see his chin skin? its white so how can he be black?

Black kid: Heelloo, black people with vitiligo exist so….

White kid: Bu- thats-….that’s just an unlikely to thing to be. Thats all. 

Korean kid: Well if you’re so hang up on skin color then Batman might be Korean? we have fair skin too.

White kid: What?? how can he be Korean if he doesn’t have Asian eyes??

Korean kid: Ah, well not all of us have “Asian Eyes” and even if we do, Batman has his mask on him at all time, so how do you know he doesn’t have “asian eyes” under there?

White kid: Because I’m being logical and going by facts unlike you.

Arab kid: Well if you really wanna be “logical” wouldn’t it make the most sense if Batman was middle-eastern?

White kid: And how does THAT make any sense?!?

Arab kid: Well I mean the current Robin is obviously Arab and unlike all the other Robins he refer to Batman as “father” which would mean Batman is his father so it would make sense if Batman too was the same ethnicity as his son.

White kid: Okay all of you really need to stop attacking me right now because Batman is white just like Jesus is >:(

Arab kid: Oh boy if you think Jesus was white then I got some news for you…

A Change In Time (Bucky x Reader)

A Change In Times (Bucky x Reader)

Contains slight angst and a lot of fluff

Based on the request by @hotemotionalmess (sorry I got carried away and turned it into a holiday thing);

‘Can I request a Bucky x reader where the avengers are on a super long car trip and they’re still in the stage of “I’ve got the biggest crush on you but I won’t say anything” and they end up being jammed in the backseat together, reader falls asleep on Buck’s shoulder, he listens to her music, and cute moments like that ending with a unintentional but super sweet kiss from Bucky?’

-Written by @toastburninglucy


Sunlight filtered down in beams through the smudged window and warmed your bare arms as you reached up, feeling the slight pull of the seatbelt bite into your skin, and cracked the window open. Sweat clung to the back of your neck as you lifted your hair off it and tied it into a bun before picking up your cards. “You going to tell us where we’re going yet, Stark?” You called over the top of your seat, craning your neck to see the top of his spiked hair reaching up above his headrest

“What kind of fun is a road trip if you know where you’re going?” He replied, smirking at you in the rearview mirror

“This is technically bordering on kidnap,”

“As if anyone would want to kidnap you…”

You shook your head with a smile and swiveled in your seat to face Steve and Bucky who were across the aisle waiting. “Well then Barnes, what’s it going to be?”

Bucky shook his head and took another card from the pile. You had never been into card games, but you were in love with this one. Steve had told you it was called rummy; even though you still didn’t really know what you were doing, it was fun to hang out with him and Bucky without talking about missions for a change. “I can’t believe I’ve never played this game before,” You commented as you reached across to take a card from the pile between you all “it’s brilliant.”

“You know, I never thought when I came out of the ice that I’d be able to teach anyone anything. I figured I’d always be the person who was one step behind,” Steve said, placing his sunglasses on his forehead with a sad smile

“Who taught you?” You asked, drawing a card from the pile and then dumping another

“My mom,” He replied, his smile brightening as he spoke “she had to work late a lot when I was a kid, and because I wasn’t exactly the healthiest I didn’t sleep much. So, when she came in after a long shift we’d sit on the floor and play this until I fell asleep…”

Steve trailed off and stared at his cards for a moment, so wrapped up in the pleasure of the past that the present escaped him. Bucky put a hand on his friend’s shoulder and bowed his head “I miss her too.”

Whenever you heard Bucky talk about Sarah Rogers you felt the love and respect for the woman seep delicately through his words. In many ways, she had been like a mother to him too. “She’d be proud of you both,” You said truthfully, leaning forward and setting your winning cards down on the flip down table “even though I did just kick both of your asses at rummy.”

You all laughed, and when you felt Bucky’s gaze settle on you you found yourself blushing so furiously that you had to look away. Yesterday you had both ended up crammed in the back of the bus next to each other and you had tiredly rambled to him about any and everything until you had drifted off to sleep and let your head rest on his shoulder. He hadn’t mentioned it since, which was irritating you slightly because waking up with your head on his shoulder and feeling his arm around you was all you could think about. As you shuffled the cards for the next game, you wondered if he thought about it too.  

_

“Okay team, pile out!” Tony shouted as he pulled the door to the back of the bus open


Everyone piled out slowly and stretched their aching limbs as they took in their surroundings. A five day journey had lead you here, and you had to admit you were impressed. “A lake house?” Natasha asked with a raised eyebrow “What are we, horny teenagers?”

Tony shrugged and slid his sunglasses onto his face. “It’s one of my lesser known properties; it actually belonged to my Mom’s side of the family and it’s still technically in their name.”

“It is beautiful, I have never seen an area of Midgard akin to this,” Thor interjected, cracking his spine into place

It was breathtaking. The house looked like it had just been painted yesterday, and the rolling lawns surrounding it lead down to the most beautiful lake you had ever seen. It glistened in the low sunlight and was so perfectly blue that you half wondered if Tony had put dye in it. You walked slowly across the gravelled drive up onto the porch and pushed the door to the house open. “Holy cow,” Bucky muttered from the back of the group.


Holy cow indeed. It was like stepping into the pages of a magazine; grand mahogany tables dotted about the place, some holding vast crystal vases which were filled with the most beautiful white chrysanthemums you had ever seen. Most of Tony’s properties were quite contemporary, so this was a real shock. You stepped into the hallway and took your shoes off out of respect for the house, your mind’s eye imagining young Tony running around with Howard and his wife chasing him as he cackled with glee. It felt like a place you should be in with family, and you thought of yours with a small pang. This was the kind of place you would have vacationed at as a kid with them; now you were the only one left. “Y/N?” Tony clapped a hand on your shoulder, pulling you from your thoughts.

You looked around and realised everyone had gone. “You going to pick a room?” He asked, gesturing to the sweeping carpeted staircase “If you’re not quick you’ll end up with the one with a garden view.”
A smile crept onto your lips “I think I’ll live, Stark.”

_

That evening after you had all stuffed yourselves with pizza and played so much table tennis in the games room that you could still hear the ball hitting the table hours after you’d stopped playing, the house fell into silence as everyone fell asleep. That is, everyone but you.

You sat on the blue cushioned window seat looking out onto the garden as it was doused in moonlight. Out here there was no light pollution, the sky could be itself for a change. You had been itching to explore outside for a while, but you were worried about waking everyone up. It wasn’t often that you all got a good night’s sleep, and you’d hate to ruin that for everyone. Eventually you lost the battle with yourself and you crept from your room and through the dimly lit halls until you found your way downstairs and out the back door. As you inhaled the cool night air with half lidded eyes you smiled and made your ware barefooted across the grass and onto the sandy bank of the river.

You looked across the moonlit water and allowed yourself to think of your family. A tear tracked down your cheek as you thought of the people who had loved you that you still loved, people who no longer existed. They were shadows in the corners of your memory, always present and waiting. Perhaps that’s why you related to Steve and Bucky so much- you knew what it was like to have no one. Your heart contracted painfully at the thought of your mother and suddenly you were crying because you couldn’t quite remember the sound of her voice.

“Y/N?”

You turned around to see Bucky stood behind you, regarding you with a hesitant smile. “Hey doll,” He whispered “mind if I join you?”

You shrugged, feeling a little embarrassed as you wiped your eyes with the edge of you sleeve. Bucky sat heavily next to you with a gentle sigh. Neither of you spoke. Somewhere in the distance crickets held riveting conversations with one another and chirped with glee. Everything was peaceful.

“Does it stop hurting, do you think?” You breathed into the darkness “Losing the people you love?”

Bucky sighed and ran a hand through his recently cut hair. He wanted so desperately to tell you that the pain would ease into nothingness. He wanted to say that he didn’t still dream of the smiling faces of the people he had left behind, only to wake in the morning and realise they were all gone. He wanted to tell you that you were beautiful even when you were crying, and that with the exception of Steve, you were the only person he dreamt of that was still here.

He said none of these things, and instead told you he didn’t know. Which was the truth. “I’m pretty sure they wouldn’t want you to sit here crying though, even if they can’t tell you that themselves.”

You looked up at him. “What do you think they’d want me to do?”

Bucky exhaled with a chuckle “Well, that I can’t help you with. I’m not very good at filling my time nowadays,”

“What would you back in the 40’s?”

He shook his head, looking to the ground with a smile. The wind gently blew your hair back from your face and you closed your eyes to relish in its coolness. “I’d probably be out with a dame,” Bucky admitted “that was my thing. I’d knock on her door at six with flowers and we’d walk down to the dance hall; it was usually on a Sunday, the tickets were half price and I wasn’t exactly made of money. We’d dance in the middle of the floor until the owner booted us all out, and then I’d make my move.”

You laughed and wiped your face clean with a tissue you had secreted in your pocket. “What was your move?”

Bucky looked a little proud and embarrassed at the same time “I’d get Steve to take her coat home as well as his so she’d get cold on the way home and I could lend her my jacket.”

You couldn’t contain your laughter at the thought of Steve trying to sneak home with some poor girls coat in his arms. And then you felt a strange longing to be one of those poor girls, walking down the street in Bucky’s jacket with aching legs and a joyous smile at the lingering feeling of his touch on your shoulder from that last dance. “You know, I’ve never been to a dance,” You confided “not even at school.”

“Really? I refuse to believe that.”

“I’m afraid it’s true; you see Barnes, underneath my badass facade, I’m really quite a dull person.”

Bucky’s eyes sparkled as they  “You aren’t to me.”

Somehow, you knew he wasn’t lying.

_

The next couple of days passed in a blur of barbeques, laughter, and throwing people into the lake. You had never seen the team so relaxed, especially Bruce, who seemed to be in his element reading on a lounger beside the lake. Every evening you would walk down to the lake, and most of the time Bucky would join you. You would find yourself willing away the happy hours of the day, waiting for the sun to set so you could sneak out onto the lake shore and talk with Bucky until it rose again. “You and Barnes sure are hanging out a lot recently, Y/N,” Natasha observed as you both ducked behind a bush, hiding from the others in the midst of a water gun fight “what’s going on there?”

You felt a blush creep onto your cheeks as you looked around you to check the area was clear. This was a good spot, you both had a slight advantage here. “Nothing, Nat. We’re just friends.”

Nat peeked over the top of the bush and quickly shot at Rhodey before ducking down again as he looked around in confusion. “I don’t need to be an expert in reading people to know that’s a lie,” She smirked, pumping up the pressure on her gun

You rolled your eyes, ignoring the smile on your face “You can believe whatever you want to, Nat.”

“Oh believe me, I do.”

You were about to squirt her with your gun when Rhodey suddenly appeared at your side and shot you both. “Ha! Don’t mess with War Machine!”

“Can you call yourself that outside of the suit?”

He paused for a second and thought. “I mean, I guess so.”

You shot him in the shoulder and ran, cackling to yourself the whole way.

_

That night after you had showered the team decided they wanted to go and some new movie that was being released at midnight. At three o’clock they were all ready to go, deciding they were going to hit an arcade or something before they went to the screening. “C’mon, Y/N, why are you passing up the chance to see the new Star Wars?” Sam groaned

“Because I still haven’t seen the first ones?”

Sam looked mildly disturbed at this information and then smiled “Well, if you’re sure then I guess it will just be you and Frosty here tonight.”

Your heart skipped a beat. “Bucky’s staying too?”

He nodded and winked at you “Don’t you kids go too crazy, okay?”

You punched him on the shoulder lightly and grinned “See you later, Sam.”

Sam ran out the door with everyone else, leaving you stood alone in the hallway with your heart beating so loudly you were sure they’d be able to hear it in space. This was crazy, why were you nervous? You’d been spending the past few nights talking to him without pause, why would this be any different?

You walked into the kitchen and looked at the calendar. Sunday July 20th.  You’d been there for four days, but it felt more like months. If you were perfectly honest with yourself, which you always tried to be, you weren’t looking forward to going back to ordinary life. Who did in the middle of a holiday though? You opened the cupboards looking for something to satisfy your appetite and when you eventually moved onto the fridge you found a half eaten pizza which was calling your name. As you took the box over to the table you heard footsteps in the hall and your heart leapt into your mouth. This was ridiculous, it was only Bucky for crying out loud! You needed to pull yourself together.

He walked into the kitchen with his jacket slung over one shoulder. “I need to go out for an hour, will you be okay on your own?” He asked in a strange voice which made you feel like a twelve year old being left home alone for the first time

You took a bite of the pizza and shrugged, trying to hide your disappointment. “Sure, take all the time you need.”


With a curt nod he walked out of the room, making your heart sink as you listened to the front door close and a car pull off the drive. Maybe you should have gone to see Star Wars, at least then you wouldn’t have ended up alone. You picked up your pizza and trudged off to your room in the low light, resolving that it would be better to sleep away the time than sit around moping. 

_

The sky was just starting to fall asleep when you finally woke up. You yawned and sat up with a gentle stretch, feeling the kind of refreshment you only get from a really good nap. It was then that you noticed it sitting on the pillow next to you; a thick cream envelope with your name wrote on it. You opened it cautiously and gently pulled out the piece of paper inside it.

‘I’ll pick you up at six.’

You reread the sentence and turned the paper over in your hands to look for something else. But it was only that single sentence. Was this a prank? If you opened the door and there was a clown outside it again, then you were going to kill Tony. You looked at the clock next to your bed, 5:55pm. You hopped out of bed and quickly threw some clean pyjamas on and waited. At 6pm exactly, there was a gentle knock on your door. Preparing yourself mentally, you put your hand on the doorknob and opened it.

Bucky stood in front of you looking proud and nervous all at the same time. You looked him up and down feeling slightly confused as you realised he was wearing a suit. “These are for you,” He said, handing you a bouquet of white flowers with a shy smile.

You took them from him in a daze. “Bucky, what’s going on?”

“Isn’t it obvious, doll?” He grinned gently ushering you into the hallway and grabbing your jacket from your room before closing the door “I’m taking you dancing.”

You looked at him with wide, overwhelmed eyes as he gently placed your jacket over your shoulders. “But I… I’m in my pyjamas.”

Bucky shook his head and offered you his arm, which you took gently “Don’t worry, you look great.”

You walked down the hallway with him half wondering if you were still dreaming, clutching your flowers tightly in your left hand as Bucky led you through the house and out the back door into the garden. “Where are we going?” You asked as you slowly began to realise what was happening

“You’ll see.

You walked through the gardens farther than you had gone before until you came across a bandstand by the lakeside which was wrapped delicately in strings of lights. Bucky reclaimed his arm and walked over to it, beaming as he turned around and looked at you. “What do you think?” He asked, looking at you expectantly “I know it’s not exactly a dance hall, but I-”

“Its perfect,” You breathed, taking in the scene before you as your jacket slipped off your shoulders and crumpled to the ground behind you

Bucky smiled and offered you his hand as you walked towards him. You took it with a smile and walked up the three short stairs with him. “Now, I err… I don’t exactly have any music.” He said, looking embarrassed “It was all on my phone but it died just before I knocked on your door.”


You pulled your phone out of your pocket “Would my music do?”

“Of course.”

You walked over the the small speaker by the stairs and connected your phone to it. After a moment, your Otis Redding album began to play. ‘A Change Is Gonna Come’ echoed throughout the bandstand and you nervously walked over to Bucky, who for the first time looked like he didn’t have anything planned. “Shall we?” You whispered

Bucky swallowed and nodded, gently taking your hand in his and placing another hand on your waist. A moment lingered and then you were gently waltzing around the bandstand. Your eyes never left Bucky’s and after a minute the sheer brilliance of it struck you so much that you had to smile. “I thought you said you hadn’t danced,” Bucky said with a grin as he spun you

“I said I’d never been to a dance, I never said I couldn’t.”  

You pressed closer together until your head was practically resting on his shoulder. You closed your eyes and breathed in his smell and realised that you were ever so slightly in love. Bucky twirled you again, and when you saw the look on his face you realised for the first time that he felt the same way. Then suddenly you were kissing him, and it felt every kind of right.

_


The team arrived home at 3am, a couple of them a little drunk and most of them geeking out. “Y/N? Bucky? We’re home!” Steve shouted into the empty house

When no reply came he began to look a little worried. “Check the garden,” Nat said through a yawn “they’re usually out there this time of night.”
Steve didn’t bother to ask what she meant and headed out to the garden looking for you both. After a few minutes he reached the bandstand and saw you both out there, dancing slowly together with your eyes closed. Steve laughed and shook his head “About damn time,” He muttered, picking up your jacket from the grass and putting it over his arm as he turned and started heading back to the house. Times hadn’t changed that much, he thought to himself as he heard you both laughing quietly behind him, only this time Steve had a feeling that Bucky would still be dancing with the same dame next Sunday.

(Credit to @toastburninglucy the writer of this request if you wanna send love, leave a comment (not an ask to this blog as she won’t see it), or go over to her blog and send her the love there. Thank you for taking on the request, I really loved this. - Rosalee)


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First of all, sorry for the slow responses! I forgot that I had to work a shift today, so I wasn’t around all afternoon. Which didn’t leave much time for me to write, but here I am, so lets do this (until I inevitably disappear to get some sleep)! Also I’ve gotten some very lovely asks but I wanted to write this down before I forgot. I thought of this headcanon while I was working and it’s too damn good not to share:


Alright, this happens at some point after CW but before Thanos shows up. The team (without Bucky, who’s still in Wakanda, working on getting his head cleared) is back in the US, having signed some form of revised accords. Steve is no longer team leader, but otherwise they’ve gotten off fairly easily with little repercussions. The tension between the old and new Avengers is obvious and especially Tony is met with outright hostility. It doesn’t help that Rhodey still isn’t in any shape to join the fights and is rarely around.

One day Clint signs Tony up for a parenting class. It’s another not-nicely-meant joke because of all the criticism Tony’s gotten for letting Peter fight. Only, the thing nobody expected? Tony actually goes. Because apparently he’s just that masochistic (apparently part of him still desperately wants to fix, to work things out between them). It earns him a lot of harsh ridicule, but Tony finishes it all the same.

Thing is, the Team Cap is so busy making fun of him, they don’t even notice when things start changing. Little things. When Steve walks into an argument between Clint and Tony and asks the latter “What have you done now?” disappointedly, Tony doesn’t snap something, get defensive or flee. He says “Have you ever noticed that you’re always immediately assuming I’m the one who has done something?”. It earns him another hurtful comment from Clint, and the incident is forgotten.

Until. Until, one day, during a debrief, Steve snaps. “She’s just a kid, Tony!” he yells when Tony keeps insisting on harder training for Wanda.

There’s a moment of silence, before, “Oh. Really? Does everyone agree with that?”

“You’re still not done catching up, Stark? So much for the futurist,” Clint sneers, and the matter is dropped. Or so it appears.

For the rest of the meeting, Tony is quiet. Thoughtful. In retrospect, they should’ve taken it for the warning it was.

That evening, when Wanda orders a new dress online, FRIDAY dispassionately informs her the transaction is impossible, as the price goes beyond her monthly allowance.

After a fruitless shouting match with the AI, she goes to Steve. Who (after a just as fruitless shouting match) goes to Tony. Who shrugs. “You told me she’s just a kid. Nobody, not even she herself, disagreed. I’m treating her like one.”

Suddenly, M-rated movies are inaccessible whenever Wanda is in the room. Once her curfew is reached, all electric devices go into sleeping modus (unless in case of an emergency of course). Talking with Tony, screaming at Tony, proves to be completely useless. Tony refuses to budge. Repeats lessons from his parenting class, about enforcing rules and teaching children boundaries.

And it doesn’t end there. The entire team is cut off from Tony’s money–Steve has to admit, he’s entitled to that, and maybe the team has gotten a bit too used to throwing Tony’s money around. That’s not the bad part anyways, they all have their own salaries from the government, they can still live. Just maybe a little more limited than before.

But suddenly the services they’ve become accustomed to are cancelled. They have to buy groceries themselves. There is no cleaning crew after Wanda throws a temper tantrum–she has to clean it herself or one of her ‘staunch defenders’, as Tony calls them, has to do it for her. New furniture doesn’t magically appear out of thin air, they have to buy it. And suddenly–suddenly the costs are starting to add up.

There’s a list pinned to the fridge one morning–on paper even–with their chores, going from doing the dishes to the laundry, that rotate every week. Who hasn’t fulfilled his one has to do all the chores the next week. FRIDAY keeps track of it, and barring missions and injuries, there are no exceptions.

Being grounded is an honest to god possibility now, including all electronics, for when they break one of the House Rules. And they are all enforced ruthlessly.

They all try to talk to Tony about it–they aren’t children, they don’t have to put up with this shit, it wasn’t funny to begin with, when is he gonna stop this already–but he remains unmoved.

It’s all “You told me Wanda is a kid,” and “I am allowed to set rules, considering you’re living under my roof. And there really is no excuse for breaking them, you are all aware they exist and why. They’re reasonable and you know it.”

And the most damning of them all. “If you’re so grown up and independent, you know where the door is. Walk out. This isn’t a prison, and you’re always welcome back, provided that you’re following the rules. You can walk away any time you want.”

Suffice to say, Clint is getting a lot of shit for signing Tony up for that parenting class. (Tony tells him he really appreciates it because clear communication is important.)

I never loved her.
I never remembered her birthday, and although my memory has never been one to take pride in, I never took the extra time to make sure her special day resonated in my mind.

I never loved her.
Our anniversary?
I never remembered the day we started. I never remember making that day an official event and I don’t remember ever thinking an anniversary of ours would happen.

I never loved her.
I’ve asked her of her favorite color, her favorite restaurant and her favorite time of day.
But I don’t remember what color she told me she adored, I don’t remember if she hated Mexican food or not and I don’t remember if she even ever answered me when I asked her what her favorite time of day was.

I never loved her.
I find myself only remembering to forget her. But even with that, it takes very little effort.

I never loved you
but I don’t think either of us took a moment to realize it, at the time.
We were both so lonely.
And although you say you did love me,
I find that hard to believe.
Why would you ever allow yourself to love something that was so untrue?

And it’s now that you tell me it’s because you never loved yourself.
And I’m so sorry that I so unconsciously followed your lead.
To a world where actual love never existed.

—  Two lonely souls could never belong together // a.m.g.
Surprise (1/?)

Summary :  You die while being on a mission with the team. At least , that’s what you thought. What happens when you suddenly wake up alive ? What do you do now? & how will the team handle the news after thinking you’ve been dead for months?

Warnings : swearing, angst, violence , fluff( tiny, tiny bit for now).

Pairing, (so far) : Avengers x reader, Steve Rogers x Reader, Bucky Barnes x Reader( No permanent pairing yet!)
* Bold is readers thoughts,  &  italics are memories. *


                                                       Chaper One
    The sound of constant beeping fills your ears . You finally open your eyes to take in your surroundings ;You see the clean white walls, the heart monitors next to you, and the IV pole that seems to be attached to you. Where the hell am I . How the fuck am I alive ? You think back to the last thing you remember . 


    You were standing besides Bucky , fighting off hydra agents. You two banter back and forth , about how this is out of you range. How you belong behind a desk back at the tower. He wasn’t wrong, up until 5 minutes ago you were just a lab tech/hacker  for the team, you were shy and kept to yourself mostly . You were good with computers, so they asked you for help on this mission to hack into a Hydra base’s security feed. One thing led to another, and the team ended up being  severely outnumbered. You grabbed a spare weapon out of the jet you  were hiding on , then made your way out to help Barnes. Everything went fine, until Steve came to you guys. You always had feelings for Steve Rogers, but your relationship was horribly platonic. You never bothered to act on your feelings, the fear of rejection stopping you every time.  Steve was leading you back to the jet, when you had an eerie feeling of being watched. You turned around spotting an agent on a low roof, his gun aiming right at Steve. Before you comprehend what you’re doing, you throw yourself in front of Steve, yelling out a warning. The agent made his move, releasing numerous shots but missing his main target. You feel intense pain  tingle through you, you look down , seeing several bullet holes through your abdomen.  You hit the ground next to Steve with a thud. Your hands fly to your wounds , you feel your blood coating them as you try to apply pressure. Steve is immediately at your side along with Bucky. Their words are barely registering in your head, you can feel the blood loss taking its toll . Steve has you cradled in his lap , hugging you to him asking you to hold on .

Originally posted by ohevansmycaptain

You slowly lift your hand to cup his cheek, pulling his eyes to yours. “  I’d do it over again if I had to Steve. I -” he cuts you off.

“  Y/n, don’t you’re going to make it, the medical team is -”

“  I’m not going to make it , & that’s okay “ Your speech is slurring and your vision is fading to black . “ It’s okay because I Love You.” The blackness completely takes over your vision.



So how the hell am I alive? Please tell me Hydra didn’t frankenstein my body . Oh God i’m going to be sick . What if -

     Your thought are cut off by who you assume to be your doctor walking in , with a shield logo on his scrubs.

      “ You’re awake ! That’s great Miss Y/n, I thought it would take at least another month or two. You really are a fighter. “ he chuckles while scribbling something on a clipboard.

 “ Who the hell are you , and where the hell am I. How am I alive, this isn’t plausible -” 

 “ Miss , someone is coming to explain everything to you shortly now that you are awake. What I can tell you is that your are safe, in a SHIELD medical house that treats people with similar situations as yours.”  Similar situations? People that are suppose to be dead?

“ You mean people that died on duty ? What the hell kind of place -” You’re cut off by a new ,familiar voice. Son of a Bitch .

“ Stand down Miss Y/n , the doctor only did as he was ordered.

Originally posted by marvelheroes

“ Fury, you son of a bitch.” Anger boils in your body .

“ I dont think the Captain would like to hear such language coming out of a ladies mouth Y/n .” 

“ You sick son of a bitch , who the hell are you to play God ! I was dead, I shouldn’t be here . What the hell did you do to me ?!” You shout at him .

  “ Calm down Y/n, it was the same procedure we applied to other agents that ‘died’ . You just happen to wake up a hell of a lot sooner, seems your body wasn’t as willing to die as you were.”

 “ That’s not a good enough explanation Nick . This is going against Nature, i want -“

 " You cant just say thank you, can you? ” he sighs before adding ,“ You received the same procedure Coulson had.” he confesses.  Anger starts radiating through you , you were part of the research team on that procedure, T.A.H.I.T.I . It was barely out of the experimental phase the last time you saw it .     

 “  You didnt have permission to do this Nick, what if I didnt want this , huh? You unwillingly brought me back , with a program that was still considered experimental!  For all you know I could have been in fucking Heaven !” You growl . You rip out your IV , and try to stand. As soon as one of your feet hits the ground, you know you’re not stable enough.      

“ T.A.H.I.T.I  is safer than it was when you decided to leave the project. It’s not 100% fixed, but its a hell of a lot better than being dead. We had permission from your emergency contact , no one was ready to let you go yet .” He gives you a hard look . Your emergency contact was your bestfriend, Giana, she moved to New York a year after you did . You’ve been bestfriends almost your entire life, she ended up moving in with you when she came to New York .

 “ Oh my God,” She didnt even cross your mind since you’ve been awake.   

  “ She’s being called down here now. You’ve been out for a few months Y/n , Giana had to sign a confidentiality agreement, but she gave us the right to revive you .” Tears are freely flowing from your eyes, How could I not think of her . What the hell is wrong with me. Then the team crosses your mind, specifically Steve. Sure you got along with the entire team , but you spent more time with Steve, Bucky and Sam . 

 "Does the team know?” barely a whisper slides through your lips.

Fury nods his head no , “ There is time and place to tell them ,and it isn’t now. Giana should be here soon, and there’s a someone else you should meet after you speak with her. Be grateful Y/n, not everyone is given this second chance.” You almost wish that he’d say you weren’t allowed to tell them . Well , this is going to be one hell of an awkward reunion.

    He goes to leave, but you stop him .“ Why me, Nick? I’m not a superhero with powers, or even a real agent. I’m a lab technician, and barely that . I was an intern Stark took a lucky chance on .” It really doesn’t make sense to you , you weren’t anything special, just a regular girl.

 “ You fit all the criteria, and according to Stark , you are one hell of a lab tech . Maybe now you can be something more. T.A.H.I.T.I only exists in SHIELD because of the risks, you are required to stay with us for the time being. You’re a liability until we perform the remaining tests to check your stability. When you are in full health , you will be assessed& trained as what is deemed fit, whether it’s a field agent, or lab tech . Things are about to change, hopefully for the better.”

Originally posted by waverly-earp

    It was almost 2 hours before Giana shows up , you spent the time in between thinking through things .What did they tell my family about what happened to me? This is so fucking unnatural. Fucking SHIELD.

 The door flings open, revealing  a distraught Giana . Her eyes are red and still leaking tears. You don’t hold in yours, letting them stream down your face as you lock eyes with your bestfriend.

    “ Hey Gi.” You whisper, before you know it , shes bolting towards  you on the hospital bed. You wrap your arms around each other , just crying . Tears are still dripping from both of you , but the loud sobs quieted down.

She breaks the silence ,“ What the hell were you thinking ?”

Oh God, here comes the yelling. Her voice is laced with anger, confusion, & sadness. She pulls her head out of your neck to connect her eyes to yours.

     “ I wasn’t thinking, I just -”

“ OBVIOUSLY YOU WEREN’T FUCKING THINKING..” she yelled. You wince at the tone, and the fact that she’s right next to you , but yelling like you’re across a parking lot. A sob comes out of her and she buries herself in your neck again.

    “ You left me Y/n, you were gone. You left me alone, and I didnt know what to fucking do . “ Her voice is soft, what she says brings you back to tears. You embrace her tighter, laying your head on hers.

Originally posted by greysstillslays

    “ I’m so sorry , im so so so sorry . I can’t imagine what you went through. I didnt think ,i just automatically pushed Steve out of the way . I just , I dont know .” You feel her nod before she speaks up,

     “ You know, you told him you love him”

“ Thanks for reminding me ,dick .” You both let out a laugh , not breaking your embrace.   The rest of her visit consists of her telling your what’s been happening the past few months. You’ve spent 90% of your life together so far, the thought of being apart breaks you. Your heart breaks as she tells you how it was while she was alone. In your mind, you find your relationship with Giana to be as indestructible as Steve and Bucks.   She tells you that your parents were informed them that  you were sent on a trip to Europe, to take care of some business over there last minute. You didn’t even want to know what they were going to say if T.A.H.I.T.I ended up not working. You push the thought out of your mind. When she leaves, it’s a painful goodbye. You reassure her that you’ll be right here when she comes back for another visit. When the door shuts behind her , you sink back down into the bed .You sigh, feeling exhaustion over take you . You let your eyes flutter shut, pulling you into a deep sleep.   


   When you wake up, you see it’s still dark outside . The light from the tv was illuminating the room, making you squint your eyes. Weird , I didnt turn it on who di-

You’re cut off by a blur of blue ,followed by gust of wind entering your room. Your eyes widen , and look to the chair next to your bed. Your mouth drops open in disbelief .NO FUCKING WAY . 

   Your eyes land on a guy about your age, with platinum blonde hair, and piercing blue eyes. You recognize him immediately from the pictures in Wanda’s room .

 He sends you a smirk before speaking, “ Well good morning sleeping beauty , i’m Pie-”

 “ Pietro Maximoff ?” It comes out as a question, mainly because you can’t believe your eyes. Wanda’s clearly not dead brother was sitting in front you, with a sly grin on his face.

Well , Fury is just full of fucking surprises.

Originally posted by ranrightintomyheart

Permanent tags?

@marvel-fanfiction @elaacreditava @midtownsciencenerd @psychicwitchphilosopher @sammnipple

Room enough for two

This is based on a prompt that went through shittycarryonaus at some point I think? And people were saying they wanted to see it done but as far as I can tell nobody ever wrote it. AU where there is only one bed.

For @snowbaz-feda day 5.

SIMON:

It was fine in first year.

I mean, it was never really fine, Baz hated me from the moment we met, and now I was expected to spend the next eight years sharing a bed with him. Turns out there was a downside to having the biggest room in Mummers House, since it wasn’t originally supposed to be for students and apparently no-one had thought to bring in two separate beds, and no matter how much I bugged the Mage, it never seemed to get done. Eventually I just accepted it.

Anyway. It was fine in first year. We were eleven years old and it was a huge double bed. We’d curl up on opposite sides with our backs to each other, pretending the other one wasn’t there. Once we stopped fighting over it and Baz stopped trying to intimidate me into sleeping on the floor, it was easy enough to get used to it.

Keep reading

Now that we know Melissa knew about Supercorp before Katie and told her about it, I’m questioning why that took me by surprise considering only one of them has social media. Subconsciously I must’ve just assumed Katie had some type of gay clairvoyance or omnipotence that allows her to read our posts without physically seeing them. Which sounds unrealistic until you remember that Katie McGrath was born like 3 times, doesn’t exist, is a vampire but also an Irish potato that was assembled by Japanese scientists in a lab… So, I mean can you really blame me for the assumption?

anonymous asked:

So you described Dark and Anti. Can you describe Google and Wilford please? P.S. you're the best 😁

Totally! I’m sorry this took so long for me to get around to, but I had two tests this week and it’s also been a while before I watched videos including these two (besides the most recent). I just spent the past hour watching all of the (most important) videos Warfstache and Google appear in, and if you could see the amount of notes I jotted down in my phone, you’d be impressed.

So basically for this one, beyond describing these characters’ personalities, I wanna discuss their origin stories/existence in the greater Markiplier “universe”. I feel like discussing personalities was more important when analyzing Dark and Anti because they’re shrouded in so much more mystery, but with Google and Warfstache it’s pretty obvious what they’re like. The bigger question is where they came from and how they interact with Mark (and Dark, I guess), which is much less obvious.

So why don’t we start with Warfstache?

CANON ORIGINS: Interdimensional Liaison

Originally posted by jacksonmyswag

As far as Warfstache’s personality, he comes off as a complete idiot. But if we read between the lines, we see a bit of method to his madness. He’s idiotic and egotistical, yes, but he’s also fearless. He yells Slenderman into submission when he tries to attack him in The Fall of Slenderman, he presumably was going to do the same to Golden Freddy in FNAF: The Interview, and he gets into a police shootout in The Ned Affair. He also completely brushes off Phone Guy’s worries about all the “boos” that go on in Freddy Fazbear’s, only playing up his fear for the camera.

We also know that Warfstache is a convicted felon; he states that he helped beat up Slenderman while Slendy was in prison, suggesting that Warfstache was imprisoned too. We also see him commit adultery, five counts of murder (including a puppy), and arson in The Warfstache Affair, and later shoot two policemen in The Ned Affair. He also stabs Mark to death in Warfstache Interviews Markiplier, despite Mark being his hero. So clearly he has no issues with murdering people, or anything else that normal people might at least be skeeved by.

Originally posted by ninjasexpizza

So beyond Warfstache’s personality, his backstory and appearances make the mystery even weirder. The first time we see him, he’s interviewing Slenderman for AFC News. Right off the bat, this is two big red flags: Slendy is a supernatural being, and he’s also fictional. Not long after, he’s shot to death by a baby (weird) in The Ned Affair - but then we see him with his own show, “Warfstache Tonight!”, interviewing Phone Guy: another fictional character that is interestingly FUCKING DEAD by the time Warfstache gets around to interviewing him, which means we can tack on “can communicate with the departed” onto his list of interesting interview guests, along with Warfstache himself COMING BACK FROM THE FUCKING DEAD with no real explanation as to why or how.

Some other interesting takeaways from Warfstache’s various interviews, particularly in “Warfstache Tonight!”, is that he starts each episode with “Hello ladies and gentlemen and all other configurations of being!” While this could be interpreted as Warfstache acknowledging the existence of genders beyond male and female (and I’m not ruling that out), it could also be a reference to creatures that aren’t necessarily human. If Warfstache wanted to acknowledge non-male/females, he could say something like “guys, gals, and nonbinary pals”, but instead he leaves the interpretation much more open. He also says in FNAF: The Interview“My crew is just standing around like metaphor!” This is a REALLY interesting line, because it implies that his crew isn’t actually there. Does this mean that Warfstache is running the show by himself? Or does it mean that his show doesn’t really exist, at least not in the traditional sense?

Finally, the MOST interesting piece of evidence is at the end of the “True Ending” in “A Date With Markiplier”. WARNING: SPOILERS FOR “A DATE WITH MARKIPLIER” BELOW (although tbh if you haven’t watched this video yet…why not??):

Warfstache’s floating head shows up when you seem to slip between dimensions or something. The first thing he says is, “Welcome to my humble abode!” I’m sorry, his WHAT?! Then he goes on to accuse you of not knowing who you truly are while you “play this little game”, and then saying, “I can’t answer it for you but I can put you in the situation where you might discover the truth.” This tells me that: A) Warfstache can break the fourth wall and knows that you’re playing a game, B) he can see past the game’s veneer and knows your true identity, and C) that he’s bound by some sort of dimensional laws or contract that prevent him from interfering with things directly. You know who else can’t interfere with events directly? A FUCKING REPORTER.

Originally posted by antisepticdark

SO HERE’S MY CONCLUSION: Warfstache exists between dimensions. He can see/interact with/isn’t scared of supernatural beings like Slenderman and Freddy Fazbear, he can come back from the dead and isn’t scared of things that can kill him, he lives in an interdimensional realm, and he can break the fourth wall, which allows him to interview fictional characters and know things that neither Mark or the viewer don’t know.

My theory as to why is a little cloudy; maybe after he died the first time (whether this happened in The Ned Affair or at some earlier date), Warfstache made a deal with the devil to stay alive? But now he’s stuck between worlds as a liaison? And maybe part of the deal is that he can’t interact with the world directly anymore - merely report on it and just kind of exist?? My support for this theory is that he didn’t get his own show until after he was killed in The Ned Affair, and that was the same time he started referring to “other configurations of being” and his crew being “metaphoric”, suggesting he now has knowledge of otherworldly beings that he didn’t have before. But since he also interviewed Slendy before he died in The Ned Affair, I’m not entirely sure about this.

Now let’s move on to Google.

CANON ORIGINS: Malevolent, Metaphysical, Rogue Computer Virus

Originally posted by fandomqueen18

In Google’s first appearance, he’s an early-access robot that Matthias has received in the mail. It’s painfully obvious that, at least in this video, Google is a robot: he makes mechanical sounds when he moves and has a glowing G on his chest, suggesting some sort of internal lighting. Interestingly, he can make webpages and clickable holograms appear in midair for Matthias to look at and touch, but I still think this is just an extension of his robotic abilities.

In the video, Google is presented as being obviously mechanical and a slave to his programming, but he has some autonomy. Even though he’s forced to obey Matthias’s commands (do my laundry, wash the dishes), he goes out of his way to fuck up these tasks by ruining Matthias’s things. He can also speak freely when he has the opportunity, showing that he has independent thought. The biggest example of this is when he urges Matthias to give him admin privileges, something that a normal, mechanical AI wouldn’t even have the programming to do or understand. He also openly states that his secondary objective is to destroy mankind, which isn’t something that (I assume) anyone would have programmed for him, showing more extension of his limited free will.

However, at the end of the video when Google has admin privileges and begins threatening Matthias, we see Matthias defeat him by asking him too many logical questions, causing the robot to overheat (or something?) and break. Presumably, Google is “dead” now, but after the end screen we see him look at the camera while the words “ITS ME” flash, suggesting that he’s still alive.

The next time we see him, it’s in the recent 360 Minecraft video, in which Mark’s program/computer malfunctions and Google shows up in Mark’s place, claiming that his primary objective is to fix the problem, while his secondary objective is to destroy mankind. No change there. But in this video we do see that Google is much glitchier than when we last saw him. It’s also interesting to note that Mark is no longer there when Google shows up.

In my Texts From Dark And Anti update that featured Google, I implied that Google was now possessing Mark, but I don’t actually think that’s the most likely possibility. Rather, I think that Google escaped his mechanical confines and became a virus after Matthias destroyed his “host robot”, so to speak.

Originally posted by snork-iplier

Evidence: in Google IRL, Google shows up in a box. He squeaks and beeps when he moves, implying robotics. He goes limp and quiet when Matthias “breaks” him. But then how did he show up later? I postulate that, in order to survive, Google’s “soul” fled the robotic body and escaped into cyberspace, becoming a virus that could travel from computer to computer. This would explain why he broke Mark’s computer when he appeared, as viruses are notorious of doing. It would also explain his change from jerky, robotic movement to smooth-yet-glitchy movement: it implies that he’s no longer in the physical plane, but rather forced to render along with Mark’s camera equipment and Internet connection.

I’ve kind of set aside my theory that Google possessed Mark mostly because I think that Google is strictly programming and binary code rather than a supernatural being like Darkiplier or Warfstache. The only reason I haven’t ruled it out completely is the fact that Mark has disappeared when Google arrives. Maybe he possessed him; maybe he killed him the old-fashioned way, but then how could he do that if he’s stuck in cyberspace? Nothing we see in 360 Minecraft gives me reason to think he’s gained a corporeal body again. I think we’ll just have to see more footage of Google to answer this question.

Originally posted by markired

There you go! Three hours of my life and all of Mark’s alter egos later (besides Yandereplier but they’re only seen like once in a song sequence so there’s nothing to discuss lol), there’s my theories/descriptions/interpretations/etc. of Wilford Warfstache and Googleplier. This was really time-consuming but still really fun to do, so thanks so much for requesting this! As always, if you liked this, PLEASE feel free to reply/reblog and let me know what you think of these ideas + anything you’d like to add! This was really fun last time, so I’d like to see that continue. :)

I write to grow.
To experience things from someone else’s point of view. I try to think of how others see the world and see things through their eyes.
I write to become.
To be whoever I want to be. I can become old and wise, timid and fragile, strong and independent, I can be in love, I can be a lover, I can become any part of me that does or does not exist.
I write to escape.
To run away to far off places. I can paint a new surrounding; where I’d rather be and what I’d rather be doing.
I write because it allows me to live as many different lives as I want to. It allows me to be free.
—  Prompt, 2
“Why do you write?”
Amelia (Part 1 of 3)

MASTERLIST | Part 2

Pairing: Lin-Manuel x Reader

Summary: You technically met Amy first.

Note: Untitled Garbage Mystery Fic is no longer Untitled or a Mystery!

Okay, so this was initially gonna be a small thing and then it kinda got away from me so it’s a slightly less small thing? I basically needed to write something that wasn’t academic for once in my life and then this happened (with a great deal of help from @fragmentofmymind who is the greatest and listens to me every time I hit a metaphorical writing speed bump)

It’s far from the best thing I’ve ever written but I’ve had fun in this universe so far (and hope you do too). Thanks for being patient with me, my dudes. I LOVE YOU LOTS.

Word Count: 11,336 (shout out to slow burn lmao)


There’s a quiet power in wielding a camera, a strength in the ability to either capture the world in its purest truth or manipulate it into something brand new. You had learned this at a young age, stealing your grandmother’s Polaroid camera and discovering how different the image you could create would look in different types of light and more or less motion, even if you didn’t fully understand why it worked the way that it did.

It became a part of you, filling your heart with a curiosity for telling stories through images. The photo you caught of your mother as she laughed quietly to herself in the kitchen, a snapshot of your best friend right at the moment she caught you taking it, a poorly framed photo you accidentally took of yourself while trying to change the roll of film.

It was all magical to you, and it never really stopped feeling like you’d tricked the universe into allowing such beauty to exist every time you snapped a one-of-a-kind photograph.

A camera is built out of complicated technology. The mechanics of focus and aperture, f-stops and shutter speed were more than science and math to you–they were your doorway into a new world, the look of which you got to decide.

Your hands felt most comfortable when stabilizing a camera, your eye most at home behind a viewfinder, your fingers their most graceful as you pulled focus to a new subject–

“Are you even listening to me?”

Keep reading

{PART 6} I Won’t Stop You // Jeon Jungkook, Vampire!AU

Originally posted by jengkook

Pairing: Jungkook x Reader

Genre: Vampire!AU, Fantasy, Angst, Smut 

Summary; Jungkook finds out the extent of Yoongi’s damage, and gives a serious warning to the Montgomery’s in turn. Meanwhile, both you and Jungkook can’t seem to get each other out of your minds.

{Part 1} {Part 2} {Part 3} {Part 4} {Part 5} {Part 6} {Part 7}

I update this series every Tuesday evening, 9pm-10pm (UK Time)

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Allowance use

Alright my dolls, you locked that SD and started getting that money, what y'all gonna do with it?

-don’t even think about spending the whole amount. I mean NO. No matter if you are sure that’s a steel deal you got yourself, remember your daddy can leave you any time. So -

-always take some of your allowance and stack it like it doesn’t exist, literally, DEAD, burnt. Have your own little rainy day trust fund, it can be your childhood piggy bank, I don’t care as long as those paper bills aren’t spent.
Why?
You are in a great position now yet how you gonna know what tomorrow can bring you? Maybe you will be in drought for weeks sometimes a month or more. Always be prepared.

-don’t get into that terminator spending mode as soon as those hands feel the paper. Do you really need them Chanel bags and Loubies? If you are really craving for it make your SD get em for you. But honestly, shoe/bag/clothes shopping will make you happy for a while, a car or a house/apartment shopping would make you a bit more permanently happy ? These are big goals I know however aren’t unreasonable and aren’t something so not possible to reach.

-first take care of your bills/rent/tuition/food supply, COVER your basic needs for the month, SAVE the rest. You would be amazed by the sum if you counted all of them bills spent on cute little things you bought yourself from sugaring.

-Keep the receipts and sum it up in the end of a month, if you aren’t going to keep track of your money who will? God? No.

-set up some bigger goals that you plan on reaching from sugaring. It’s maybe paying off that student loan, signing up for masters degree, saving up for your own place, investing in stocks or a small start up of your own. You name it. But I’m sure there must be something more valuable to you than the shopping sprees. Tend to be more friendly to your future.

-I saw a movie few months back, and there was this scene where a bodyguard of a rich guy asks these SBs hanging in the mansion how are they investing their money? What they all said-shoes and bags. And then he spilled the basic truth, What y'all gonna do with them shoes and bags in few years? Mr X will replace you all with them younger bitches and then what? You gonna live in ya shoes? Damn. Opened my eyes. You ain’t gonna be sugaring forever.

-if you HAVE a vanilla job, don’t even dream about leaving/quitting! NO. No matter what or how good your SD is. No matter what he promises to you no matter how much money he gives you. THAT is NOT your PERMANENT INCOME. Allowance is your little/big lottery ticket you are getting every month/week. Treat it like one. It CAN be a losing one just from next time.

-be a HOE but a smart HOE. Always mention to these SDs your actual goals for your future, he is more likely to spend and help ya out with that education/business venture for example than he’ll be interested in spending on some flashy superficial stuff. I’ve learned that hard way.

-think about the way you get your allowance (wire transfer, pay pal, cheque etc) this does vary on a country you live in but CASH will always be the good old almighty cash.

-if he gives you a card, don’t buy everything you see! Take cash from ATMs and stack it. If that card is really at your disposal use it SMART. Pay your groceries with it, bills if possible, replace a thing in your home, help out your family if you are able. But don’t go on a crazy mall tour. Your SD won’t really give a damn how you used it, moreover you can earn bonus points if he notices you are spending it smart.

-I’m not saying that you should not go shopping eventually but be smart about it. Keep inventory of your wardrobe, do supply/demand chart. Do your supply renewal every 3 or 6 months. PLANNING is the mother of SPENDING. If you take care of your wardrobe it will always look fresh and new. Respect it. Remember- your bomb pussy earned that!

-you have stuff in your closet you haven’t worn a year? Great. Sell it online. It will clear up your space and get you some extra $$$.

-another tip on saving- don’t necessarily go all the time to beauty salons (if it’s not something mandatory you can’t do yourself), take some time and do your own mani/pedi, if you can style your hair (there’s some new brushes that literally do the straightening for you while using it, if I find a link I’ll post it) learn to do your own makeup. Don’t buy all the most expensive beauty products all the time, there are cheaper ones which are also good. Take note: BRAND sells the product. So don’t be a victim of someone’s successful advertising. Just because it’s a Dior cream it’s why you need to own it?

-stack as many SDs as possible, short time ones, regular ones, it means MORE money for your wallet.

-don’t show off, don’t bring that negativity out from people. It’s still bad energy and why would you possibly want to make yourself a problem or an unpleasant situation? E.g. Outing you to your friends family coworkers etc, list has no end. You DO NOT have to impress anyone! You live in your OWN skin NOT in other peoples EYES!

-if you can’t keep track of your finances/spendings hire an accountant, it will help you big time!

-take advantage of the sales when you are getting your food/wardrobe or whatever

-don’t be lazy and go to the restaurants all the time! LEARN how to cook if you don’t already know. I’m aware how delicious that home delivery is but the price of a single order could maybe cover more meals if you went to the supermarket. It’s ok occasionally ordering food/going out to eat but think how much you can save up just by cooking yourself.

-be bills and environmental friendly, which means that you don’t need to have all of your lights in the home ON all the time, take your charger out when finished charging your phone/computer, don’t leave your desktop running all day/night or on sleep mode. Same applies to your tv. Take showers instead of filling up the tub. You will be amazed how much all of that can reduce your monthly expenses! Now sum that up for a year! Oh, yes.

-instead of paying for a crazy expensive gym, go out for a run, work out at home/in nature, don’t be lazy and look up YouTube tutorials for different workouts that don’t include gym.

-use public transport whenever you can instead of taxis/uber/your own car (if you own one), take a bicycle if you can, it will do magic to your body and your bank account.

-learn the difference between your NEEDS and DESIRES. Your desire can be your worst enemy if you can’t control it.

-don’t hoard food! Do your supply AD HOC (when necessary).

-make list of all monthly expenses you have, write PROs and CONs for each. Ask yourself do you really need it every month? Cut all unnecessary things off that list.

-get a vanilla job if you already don’t have one!

Combine some of these tips and do good for yourself, doesn’t necessarily mean you have to follow up to the point rather customize it to your own convenience!

Be a smart Hoe with your money.

How To Find Your Path As A Witch (Or Not)


New witches often come to me confused and lost because they’re overwhelmed by the sheer number of directions that they could potentially take their craft. They see talk of green witches and kitchen witches, tech witches, sea witches and so many others and they have a completely human reaction to being confronted with such an overabundance of information.

THEY FREEZE UP!

Without a defined direction they feel incapable of continuing forward, they stagnate while they try to pick a path and they stop learning. They don’t want to pursue something only to have to backtrack later so they pursue nothing at all!

How is anyone supposed to get their start in the craft when they have NO IDEA what direction they want to go in? Or what if they have more than one kind of witchcraft that interests them? How do they choose?!

The answer is surprisingly simple.

You don’t!

Having a specialization or a personal path in your witchcraft can be a wonderful thing but unless you just KNOW right from the jump what kind of specialty is for you there’s no need to get wrapped up in those sorts of details.

The important thing is that you keep learning.

For the majority of people their path unfolds in the natural course of events.

Maybe you try a bunch of different things but you find after a few months that you’re gravitating toward divination almost every time you practice your craft.

Or perhaps you started out with kitchen magic but suddenly find yourself with a burning interest in stars and how they can be used in the craft.

Perhaps over the course of your time as a witch you even find that you prefer not to narrow your focus, instead pulling from many paths to create something personal to you.

Every individual witch will find their own path which, while they may choose to call it by a recognizable title, will be entirely unique to them. Finding your path is not about choosing what kind of witchcraft you want to practice, it’s about allowing your craft to develop its own flavor and personality as you learn and grow.

In order to find your path you must let go of the imposed boundaries of titles. Titles can be useful in many ways but for newer witches they can be limiting. Witchcraft is a way to claim your power! Why would you limit yourself in that pursuit?

Instead cast your net as far as you like, read about anything and everything that interests you. Allow yourself to wander in your learning, follow your whims and soak up as much variety as you can.

Don’t limit yourself to only the things that are obviously magical! The mundane can always be made magical. What do you love? Can you transform your hobbies and existing interests and incorporate them into your craft? (Hint: the answer is almost certainly yes!)

As you explore and learn and practice your path will make itself clear, the things you love, the things that make you excited will always come to the surface. You will find yourself reaching for the practices that truly FEEL magical to you again and again.

That is the essence of your craft! Those foundational practices that you use so regularly that they come as easy as breathing are what make up your personal path.

Tomorrow I’m going to be telling you about the workshop I’ve been putting together to help new witches get started and avoid the stagnation that can come from this sort of information overload!

What’s your biggest struggle when it comes to pursuing your craft? Tell me about it in the comments!

Hamilton as things my friends say

I’ve been saving these up for a while now, here it goes:

Alexander:  Now this is a story all about how my life got flipped-turned upside down, and I’d like to take a minute just sit right there, I’ll tell you how I became a total disaster

John Laurens: What? You think cuz I’m gay I talk about it all the time! I wear rainbow stuff daily! I make sure everyone knows I’m gay! Well I’ll have you know I’m not like that! *looks down and notices he’s wearing a pride shirt* uhhh *zips up jacket* 

Lafayette: Tis I! The Frenchiest Fry! The most Parisian Baguette! 

Hercules: *crocheting* I do this so I don’t kill people. I could so easily just stick this right into his eye! ….But I won’t, Imma make a scarf instead.

Burr: Here I am, just minding my own business, trying to go about life without wanting to jump off the nearest bridge, then OUT POPS THIS MOTHERFUCKER!

Thomas: It seems that my expertise is not appreciated here. Fine! I’ll just go somewhere else where people think my cooking is good and no one says shit about my coat! *stands up and pops coat collar dramatically* Are you coming or are you staying with these uncultured peasants?

James: Listen, I’m running on Dayquil and three cups of coffee and you want to start shit now?! I got out of bed for this! *Starts a coughing fit* ….I can’t wait to watch you all burn in hell. 

Angelica: I’m trying to be a good person. I keep my grades up, I try to help out my friends and family, geez, I put up with you lot for Heaven’s sake. Why can’t I just be rich, famous, and be with a smart, decent guy who likes me! 

Eliza: He was the biggest piece of shit I’ve ever met! And to think I thought I loved him. We had baby names and god parents picked out…. screw him! Allow me to explain, in song!~ *sings sad breakup songs while making everyone else in the room uncomfortable*

Peggy: Hey, here’s a little reminder for ya, I still exist! You never said any of this important gossip to me, you told my sisters and the rest of the damn WORLD, but not me….whatever, it’s fine. I don’t care anyways. 

Maria: I don’t deserve this! I never deserve any of this! I live with an asshole and he makes every day a living hell.

Philip: *showing everyone his injuries* You’re probably wondering how I got these. *Pulls up video from his go pro of him skateboarding down the street. Two pretty girls walk by and he gets distracted trying to flirt with them and show off that he doesn’t notice a parked car. He crashes into it and as the video gets blurry you hear loud cursing and the girls laughing* ….not my finest moment.

Lee: You don’t understand! I’m in crisis mode! I can’t handle this! *Shaves head*

Seabury: You damn well know my senpai is better than yours! My senpai will kick your senpai’s ass! *whispers* then maybe he’ll finally notice me….

Eacker: *talking shit* I’m not talking shit! How dare you say I’m talking shit! Fight me you punk!

Washington: Why don’t I have a say in being the dad friend? I don’t want to be the dad friend! I would never want to be the father of any of you!

King George III: Ew! Don’t touch me you filthy peasants! Don’t even go near me you disgusting swine! I am above you all! I am a King! I demand to be treated as su- *gets tripped by friend* *laying on floor dramatically* why must the world be so cruel….

Pay Me With Your Time YoongixReader
  • Yoongi: The sun is shinning! The breeze is breezing! My hair is quaffing! Life is goo-
  • Y/N bumps into Yoongi, spilling her Iced Coffee all over his new white shirt.
  • Yoongi: -cold! Life is so cold!
  • Y/N: I am so sorry.
  • Yoongi looks up into Y/N's eyes. He thinks.
  • Yoongi: It's fine.
  • Yoongi stalks away. He stops and turns back.
  • Yoongi: Actually it's not. Reimburse me.
  • Y/N: What?
  • Yoongi: Did I stutter? This shirt was expensive, and I'm probably never going to wear it again now that you've soiled it.
  • Y/N: Well what about my coffee? That'll be $7.65!
  • Yoongi: One: That is an insane amount to pay for an iced coffee. Two: (LAUGHS BOISTEROUSLY: HA HA HA) I'm not paying you, you walked into me.
  • Y/N: Are you done?
  • Yoongi: One more. Three: I just realized that you are really, really pretty. I mean like insanely pretty, and that and only that is why I will consider buying you another iced coffee and allowing you to pay for the shirt with your time.
  • Y/N: May I speak now?
  • Yoongi: Go for it.
  • Y/N: One: Have you ever had good coffee? Cuz that's how much it costs. Two: I could argue that you walked into my defenseless, motionless iced coffee and spoiled it's existence. Three: I find you attractive too and I'm willing to look over your ass-nality and get a coffee. This way.
  • Y/N stalks away towards the Coffee shop and Yoongi trails after her.
  • Yoongi: Ass-nality?
  • Y/N: Ass-Personality. Coined it five seconds ago.
  • Yoongi: Oh. - So you find me attractive? I just thought you were pretty.
  • Y/N: (Groans) How much was that shirt in hours?
  • Yoongi: About three. I'm hoping you'll ruin another one of my things though. Want to break my phone? That'll cost you at least a week. (Wink)
  • A/N
  • I'm really liking these chats. It's pretty fun to write. La La Land was amazing and it got me in the Meet-Cute mood.
  • ~Armygirl
Villain

Request: hiiii can i get a prompt 19 with kihyun :) :) :) pretty please

19) You and your bias are rival idols forced to work with each other on a collaboration

Member: Monsta X’s Kihyun x Y/N

Type: some angst, some fluff, some romance. (warning: inappropriate language/references)


You fidgeted in the back of the SUV that was seemingly swallowing you whole. You weren’t sure if you were angry, frustrated, sad, or nervous. More than likely, it was an anxiety inducing in-between, but you tried to swallow your insecurities. Heart burn and acid in your esophagus were a physical manifestation of the nerves, mixing with your heart repeatedly plummeting to your feet and back to your chest again. 

Your manager had informed you just over a week ago that you had landed an OST for one of the most talked up dramas of the year. You would be performing a duet, but the other artist hadn’t yet been selected. You were notably excited, realizing what a big opportunity this would be for your career.  Only a few days later, you were called to your manager’s office. Told to shut the door, you were already aware of the heavy tone weighing down the air. She had informed you that you would be working with someone you had detested since shortly after your debut.

Yoo Kihyun of Monsta X. 

You weren’t exactly sure when or how you became rivals. Your relationship had developed simply enough, strictly work with the occasional conversation exchanged. This had all seemed to become altered once you had both been special MC’s for Music Bank during your last comeback cycles. Both of your groups had been up for a win that week, which caused an unnecessary awkwardness between the two of you. After your group had won, once again snatching away Monsta X’s first win (although they would move forward to win the next week) your relationship had changed. 

From that point on, every time you had run into Monsta X, Kihyun had something sarcastic or rude to say. You grew to dread running into the group, which wasn’t fair to yourself or the other men of Monsta. Hearing that you would have to spend hours, if not days with him, set your nerves on edge. 

You tried to shake the thoughts from your head as you felt a light squeeze on your knee. Looking up, you met the sad smile of your manager who gave a polite nod toward the door. You hesitantly grasped the handle and gave it a gentle push, exposing you to the morning sunlight you weren’t prepared for. 

Then again, you weren’t prepared for a lot of things. 

You looked up to the Starship Entertainment building, wincing at the immensity of it. You weren’t sure how your manager had negotiated, if she had at all, but you had agreed it would be best if you used a Starship studio for the project. You glanced over your shoulder to get another supportive nod from your manager as you shuffled toward the heavy glass doors that provided entry into the building. 

After checking in with the receptionist, you and your manager were led down hall after hall. It felt like hours as you trailed behind the woman, her short and thin frame darting from one direction to the next. Eventually you reached another set of glass doors with several people on the opposite side. She pulled them open, struggling with the weight as she waved you inside. 

“Hello,” your manager chimed, bowing to everyone in the room. You followed suit, keeping your eyes low. 

“I’m unsure if everyone has met,” one of the Starship managers nodded. “But this is Kihyu-”

“We’ve met,” Kihyun sighed shortly. Your face immediately darted up as you made eye contact with the cold man. His appearance had changed since the last time you had seen him, but then again, so had yours. His hair had gone from a bubblegum pink to a dark brown. He wore a beanie, keeping his hair pushed back from his face. He wasn’t wearing any makeup, but he didn’t have anything to cover up anyhow. He was brutally handsome, which made the situation so much worse. “No need for the pleasantries.”

“Ah, Kihyun, should we treat our guests this way?” his manager laughed nervously, casting a wary side eye to one of the producers set up at the mixing board. 

“Let’s just get to work,” Kihyun grumbled, launching himself from the couch he was lounging on. He leaned back, grabbing a piece of paper he had been looking over, and crumpled it a bit. He looked back to you, pushing the now crushed paper into your hands. “The lyrics.”

He sauntered past you and into the sound booth and placed a pair of headphones over his ears. Your mouth popped open, shocked by his open act of hostility. 

“I don’t know what’s gotten into him,” his manager gasped, rubbing at his temples. “I’m so sorry.”

You slowly shut your mouth, taking in a deep breath through your nose to calm yourself. “Don’t be.”


“Alright, let’s take a break!” the composer called over the studio mic, replacing the track with his voice in the sound booth. Kihyun cocked his eyebrows as he looked up from his paper and to you. 

“Didn’t we just take a break?” he asked uncertainly. 

“Yeah, we need to have a talk,” Kihyun’s manager responded, waving you both in. You looked warily to Kihyun as you hopped from your stool and past him. 

“Yah, watch it,” he grumbled as you bumped into his knee. 

“Look, this is literally a four by four glass box,” you hissed, turning to give him a death glare. His eyes grew wide at your tone. This had been the first time you had spoken to him since you had arrived to Starship. “If you don’t want to get bumped into, take more of an effort to make yourself smaller. Oh wait…you’ve already done that, haven’t you?”

His jaw dropped as he openly stared at you, unblinking. You tried to not smile at your small victory, making sure to back into him and bump his leg again as you exited the booth.

“What’s up?” you sighed, plopping onto the couch beside your manager. She pursed her lips and wrinkled her nose, a sign you had become familiar with. This expression was usually synonymous with bad news. 

“It’s not working,” Kihyun’s manager sighed as he had entered the room. “Your chemistry…”

“It just isn’t there,” your manager finished. “While you both sing beautifully…there’s no feeling behind the words.”

“The feeling is what sells it,” Kihyun’s manager sighed. 

Kihyun was leaned against the wall on the opposite side of the room, biting repeatedly at his lip. He looked up from his shoes and to his manager. “I always sound soulful, my words are always believable.”

“Not this time,” his manager muttered, shaking his head. “You sound hollow.” 

“Hollow!” Kihyun croaked, his cheeks becoming pink with anger and embaressment. “Well what about my partner! I can only be as good as who I’m paired with!”

“There is something lacking with both of you,” your manager cooed. You lifted your brows in surprise at her words. This was the first time she had ever given you any sort of negative feedback, no matter how small it was. She placed a comforting hand on your knee, but you quickly shifted to avoid her touch. 

“Maybe you two should have a conversation, just the two of you,” Kihyun’s manager said slowly. ‘It seems as if a heaviness has been filling up the room since you have gotten together.”

Kihyun rolled his eyes as he pushed off from the wall and pulled open the door. He sighed as he looked at you, his expression asking if you were coming along. 

You sucked at your back teeth, wincing as you stood. You didn’t even care about the OST anymore, you just wanted to be out of this uncomfortable situation. 

“You need to get your shit together,” Kihyun hissed, almost as soon as you stepped into the hallway. You could hardly believe his words. You looked down, realizing his muscular fingers were wrapped around your arm. You shook him off, recoiling from his touch and shot him the dirtiest look you could muster. 

“Don’t touch me,” you spat. “I need to get my shit together? At least I’m not accosting my singing partner in the hallway.”

“Oh, for fuck’s sake, accosting?” Kihyun groaned. “I was hoping to shake some sense into you.” 

“I’m not one to let the villain win,” you whispered. “But I can’t do this anymore. I quit.” 

You began to enter the studio again, only to have Kihyun grip you by the shoulder and spin you around. He tugged you a bit further down the hall, causing you to drag your feet in an attempt to halt him. 

“What in the hell Kihyun?” you gasped as he finally stopped, looking around to see the area he had pulled you to wasn’t as well lit and only led to an emergency exit. 

He turned, placing either of his hands on the opposite side of the wall beside your face. He pushed his body entirely too close to yours, the heat of his emotion radiating toward you. He used his arms as a cage in which you were incapable of escaping. Your breathing grew more shallow at his close proximity, unknowingly allowing him to search your face with scrutiny. 

“I’ll scream,” you whispered, your eyes not backing down from his. 

“Do it,” Kihyun hissed back, his words a challenge. You opened your lips for a moment, considering the idea, but promptly closed them, knowing full well you couldn’t get him into that sort of trouble. 

“Why am I the villain? And who even calls people villains anymore?” he continued. You looked out of your peripherals at his hands encasing you, flat against the wall. His chest was flush against yours, a constant reminder of his existence and absurdity of the situation. 

“Who has who pinned to the wall?” you mumbled. “But you’re the one who seems to have a problem with me, Yoo Kihyun. It’s not the other way around.”

“Why in the hell would I have a problem with you?” Kihyun spit. “You’re the one making this whole situation awkward.”

“What kind of skewed universe are you living in?” you laughed bitterly. “You’ve treated me as if I was a piece of gum stuck to the bottom of your shoe ever since my group won at Music Bank.”

“You think that’s what this is about?” Kihyun gaped. “A stupid award show?”

“Then what is it about? Enlighten me!” you gasped. 

Kihyun nodded for a moment, his eyes focusing on your lips before he looked back up to you. “Have you ever heard…that some men show their emotions like children sometimes? That they will bully women they have feelings for?…I think…I think I can show you better than I can explain it to you.”

“This isn’t a drama, Kihyun,” you grumbled. “I don’t t know if this OST has you in your feelings, but-”

Your words were abruptly cut off as Kihyun pressed his lips into yours. The kiss was hesitant at first, soft with uncertainty. Surely Kihyun had some idea that you could possibly rear back and smack the smugness from his face, but you were unsure if you wanted to do that. Your vision had begun to blur in the few moments before you finally decided to close your eyes and kiss back. 

Kihyun took this as a signal to remove his hands from the wall and let them rest lightly on your waist. You lifted your own fingers to curl around the back of his neck and play with the hair at his nape. With his tongue, Kihyun parted your lips, using his force to tilt your head back and explore even further. You relaxed into the kiss, getting over the initial shock and allowed him to do what he wanted. All of the angst and anxiety from the day melted away and into the kiss. Nothing about today had felt more right than this moment. Kihyun pulled you closer, stroking your back through the thin cotton of your t-shirt. Surely, this would give you inspiration for your song.

“Kihyun! Y/N! Where did you go?” the deep voice belonging to Kihyun’s manager called down the hallway.

Kihyun’s lips detached from yours, taking a small moment to smile at you. “We’re coming…

…well, not yet. I’ll have you doing that tonight actually.”

Originally posted by klhyunnie