why are their pockets so big

Omg guys. But soulmate au where you have the first words your soulmate ever speaks to you on your skin but you don’t have anything on your wrist and so you live your whole life with this feeling of being alone but then one day you meet someone and you say something really stupid and they just stand there in shock but they can’t explain why and you assume it’s because what you said offended them and you start to apologize but they shake their head and scramble to lift the sleeve of their shirt and there on their wrist are the words you just fucking said and you start to cry because you have to tell this person that it must be a coincidence because you don’t have a soulmate and you lift up your sleeve to show that there’s nothing there and they grab your face and smile so big and reach into their pocket to pull out a note they must have carried around for a long time because society demands because there on that paper are the words “I’m mute”

Paid Relationship Study

I’m obsessed with the fake relationship trope and I saw this post and got inspired


“Have you gone insane, Potter?” Draco told his roommate, who was holding up a flyer excitedly in front of him. Written across the top in bold, capital letter said “PAID RESEARCH OPPORTUNITY” and just under than “Romantic Couples Study”.

“What? We’re both over eighteen, we both live together, and we get paid six thousand pounds! That’s three thousand pounds each!” Harry replied, reading off the criteria from the paper.

Draco snatched it from his hand and examined it. “Potter, we are not in a committed, monogamous romantic relationship, nor have we been dating for six months!”

“Yes, but six thousand pounds! You and I both know we need the money. It’s only a two week study, so we just have to pretend to be a couple until it’s over.” He explained. Draco crossed his arms, looking conflicted. It was bad enough that he had to share a house with the guy he fancied, but pretending to be in a relationship with him? Could he go back to being just his friend after this was over? “Come on, Draco.”

The words softened him. Of course he’d do anything for Harry bloody Potter when he was looking at him like that. “Fine.” He gave in, handing the flyer back to Harry. “But you’ll owe me, Potter.” Pointing a finger at him accusingly, Draco walked out of the room.

“More than giving you half of the money?” Harry shouted after him.

“You better buy me a present with your half!” He shouted back, hearing Harry chuckle.

Keep reading

fa-ee  asked:

for ur consideration: almost familial relationship dynamics between javert and les amis. it gets to the point enj starts carrying panadol to rallies, because hes always the first to be arrested and he knows that the noise gives javert a headache and he also knows javert never remembers to bring his own painkillers. javert carries hand cream because the cuffs chafe bahorel's big ass wrists. ferre asks javert abt his ant farm. courf remembers his birthday.

AAAAAAAHH OH MY GOD
How do you know my weaknesses my friend?? I love Javert-who-begrudgingly-cares-for-this-bunch-of-kids with all my heart. Also, Javert would have an ant farm. He would.

One time they plan a rally specifically on Javert’s birthday so they can all get arrested and throw him a surprise party from a holding cell. Joly was carrying like 43 candles in his pockets and Javert had no idea why until he tried to light them all at once behind his back and everyone started singing the song

Sadly they couldn’t smuggle cake in but what can u do yknow

nursey’s teeth shift really easily so he’s still a big retainer stickler. the gold inscription on his battered blue plastic retainer case has faded; it used to say his ortho’s name and address (the number is a new york county area code) but he’s thumbed it over so many times, let the case fall into a dark corner of his duffle bag or get shoved into his back pocket, that it’s seen its fair share of wear.

it’s why smh has so many videos of nursey groggy in the morning during a roadie, even post-kegster with a gentle lisp asking everyone to keepf ith down pleaf, thank youf g'nite

Nct as things I've witness in my honors English class

Taeil: teacher giving students a 20 page packet to read and summerize + another story for a test. All due the next class they have together

Hansol: sits in the back and shoots hair ties at people until someone slaps him

Johnny: answers the phone when the teacher is out in an fake Asian accent but no one rats him out

Taeyong: brings febreeze because the person sitting in front of them smells

Yuta: asks a lot of questions that will get the teacher triggered so they can waste class time. Ex.“Harry Potter sucks. Why do you even like it” the teacher then proceeds to spend half of class explaining why and how hurt he is

Kun: sits in front and no one knows who tf they are but the one time the teacher does call on them everyone is shook because their voice is so nice

Doyoung: salty 25/8 and refuses to do any work but somehow has an A in that class

Ten: holds hand with the person in front of them for the whole class and everyone is just used to it. Was once asked why and answered with ‘they have really soft hands’. That was when everyone realized that they had a big thing for hands ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Jaehyun: gets really hungry and the teacher won’t let them bring in food for because it’s 'unfair’ so brings in a giant bag of eggrolls to share but eats the majority of it

Winwin: teacher’s favorite student that always gets to keep their phone even though they were on it during class. the teacher proceeds to take everyone’s phone that he sees out of their pockets

Mark: said 'I Want To Die’ too loud in class and got pulled out to have a talk with the teacher about how it is not funny to joke around like that but is laughing the whole time. Convo went like this: “are you getting mentally or physically abused” “no” “don’t lie to me” “okay” “now it’s okay to be getting abused” “but I’m not getting abused” “it’s okay if you don’t want to talk about it” “???”

Haechan: got someone else to do their homework but the other person trolled them and messed up their homework by writing comments like 'this is stupid’, 'this class is fucking boring’ and 'no one is gonna read this because this is sucky like this class

Renjun : legitimate angel that will lend you notes when you nap if you give them a piece of coffee candy

Chenle: if they don’t get to sit next to their best friend will get all moppy and depressing. also gets triggered af when their best friend isn’t there and will throw a tantrum

Jeno:brought a pillow to class and swore he was not taking a nap and just 'resting his eyes’

Jaemin: teacher told this kid to stop smiling because it was creepy af and laughs at the most inappropriate times

Jisung: broke down when they had to do their final presentation and still got an A

Osomatsu-san PS Vita game translation - Karamatsu 05 - Stand by the Second Son

Jyushimatsu: Yuuuum! More oden, please! 

Chibita: Ok. 

Osomatsu: Yep, oden tastes great again today. I’m glad we came all this way to eat it. 

Choromatsu: Chibita, hot sake, please. Oden does go well with it, doesn’t it? 

Chibita: ….You jerks, you brought enough money to pay for everything this time, didn’t you? 

Karamatsu: Heh… money? There is no meaning in attaching a price to the fantastic cosmos known as oden. 

Keep reading

2

“In ‘78, I was an instructor at an acting academy. It helped me earn some pocket money, but the girl I was dating at the time said she would only date and not marry me. When I asked her why, she said it’s because I was poor. Later, I found out she was the daughter of the owner of a big theater. Her family was wealthy. Back then, whenever theaters put on shows, they made a truckload of money. So that’s why she wouldn’t marry me. Around that time, someone set up a blind date for me. Those days, even the slightest mention of being an actor meant immediate rejection, because it meant I didn’t make any money. Because I was still dating my girlfriend at the time, I went on the blind date, flat out told her that I was an actor, and just went home. But the next day, the matchmaker scolded me, saying there was no such girl like her. Apparently, the girl went back to the matchmaker after meeting me and said, ‘Money is just something that comes and goes, so what’s so important about it? Sincerity is what’s important.’ After hearing that, I asked her to meet me again at a place called Ssun Coffee House on 5th Toegye Street. After talking with her, I found out that she really meant what she said. And then, one month after our blind date, I got married. With my Flower.”

“Now she’s really beautiful, but truthfully, I didn’t realize all of my Flower’s beauty back then. But just sitting in that coffee house and listening to her speak, I remember thinking, ‘This woman is my wife.’”

“78년도 그때 나는 연기 학원 강사를 하고 있었어. 그걸로 용돈을 벌어 썼는데 그때 만나던 여친이 나랑 연애만 하고 시집은 안 온대. 아니 왜 안오냐 그랬더니 가난해서 싫대. 나중에 알고 봤더니 큰 극장의 사장 딸이더라고. 집에 돈이 많은 거야. 그때는 쇼 같은거 한 번 하면 돈을 가마니에 담았거든. 그래서 나랑 결혼 안한다는 거지. 그러던 중에 중매가 들어왔어. 그때 당시 연극한다고 하면 돈을 못 버니까 그냥 바로 딱지맞는 시대였거든? 나도 여자친구가 있으니까 중매 가서 ‘저 연극합니다.’ 하고 그냥 돌아왔지. 근데 다음날 중매해준 사람이 ‘너 그런 여자 요즘 세상에 있는 줄 아냐’면서 나한테 뭐라 그러는거야. 그 여자가 중매 끝나고 돌아와서는 ‘사람이 돈이라는 게 있다가도 없고 없다가도 있는데, 돈이 뭐 중요해요. 성실한게 중요하지.’ 그랬다는 거야. 그 말 듣고는 그때 퇴계로 5가에 ‘썬 다방’이라고 있었는데 거기로 그 여자보고 나오라 그랬어. 얘기를 해보니 정말 자기는 그렇게 생각한대. 그러고 선 본지 한 달 만에 결혼했어. 우리 꽃님이랑.”

“지금이야 너무 예쁜데, 사실 그때는 꽃님이가 막 예쁜 줄 몰랐어. 근데 그냥 그 다방에 앉아서 얘길 듣는데 ‘이 여자는 내 마누라다.’라는 생각이 딱 들더라고.”

somethingofavoid  asked:

could you point me in the direction of the evidence that alexander the great was a bottom? I absolutely don't doubt it's true but I've never seen anyone say otherwise so I figure there's some proof of some sort I'm missing, but couldn't find anything myself

you didn’t find anything because there is no proof, and in fact, the sources tell us the precise opposite. so why did i say he bottomed in my joke post? let’s get into it.

A (SIMPLIFIED) PRIMER: in ancient old mediterranean times it didn’t matter if you were a man who boned men or women – you should probs do both – but what mattered VERY much was whether you topped or bottomed. are you old enough to have a beard? now you’re too old to bottom. pederasty was the name of the game in the south (think athens) especially. if macedon followed these same sexual mores, we can’t be sure, tho they were likely similar. 

now that you know this, take note that hephaestion was actually older than alexander, taller, and more masculine and impressive-looking. according to the above – that’s called the dover model – it should be a given that hephaestion topped, right? or that they didn’t have a relationship at all, considering they were so close in age, and the dover model mandates a big age difference. then why do i have in my pocket two handy examples of hephaestion being identified not only as the bottom but as younger than alexander? observe:

• justin refers to hephaestion as “puer” (”boy” but with connotations in this context of “young pretty bottom boy”) 
• arrian refers to hephaestion as alexander’s “ἐρώμενος” (i.e. alexander’s beardless younger bottom) 

weird, right? we could take this at face value, discounting all that we factually know about hephaestion, or we could take a look at how romans of the late republic/early principate – when these biographies were penned – viewed sexuality in their own society, and how that may have influenced the way they interpreted alexander and hephaestion.

late republic/early principate sexual mores were a bit different from classical greek mores in that, simplified version, the socially superior partner had to top, and the supremely socially inferior – like a slave or a woman – was to bottom. hephaestion was second man in the empire with a massive presence in court; importantly, he was free-born. if alexander and hephaestion had a sexual relationship, which the roman biographers were fairly certain they did, that meant to the romans that hephaestion was either sleeping his way to the top (a common late republic sentiment – cicero used it against antony, like, hourly) which is very not befitting for, you know, the top general in the empire, or – worse – that alexander was a tyrant who was raping his second in command, and hephaestion wasn’t man enough to fight back against it. yikes. even worse option than that to the romans? alexander, king of kings, was taking the d from someone below his status. no matter what the evidence said – like hephaestion’s age and physicality and what we know about alexander’s personality, which i’ll get to in a minute – that was literally unthinkable. 

so the principate biographers lied. yep. in order to better mould hephaestion to their worldview, some bent the history so that hephaestion was younger and prettier (justin), or just plain unimportant enough that being alexander’s ἐρώμενος was socially acceptable (arrian). some laid into the nepotism angle even if they didn’t explicitly state fucking as the cause of it (plutarch). 

take-home message? history is malleable: like a memory, it never remains whole and accurate. the more often we pull it from the shelf, the more often it gets rewritten. 

idk, oprah. proof isn’t a thing that really exists for this period. but now that we know the roman histories are sometimes fake news, here’s some stuff supporting alexander bottoming: 

good evidence: historiography & the dover model

• what the romans had to say about hephaestion and alexander’s relationship is lowkey lies, so even tho we can’t definitively say hephaestion topped, we know that pretty much all evidence that hephaestion bottomed is not legitimate. that means the opposite could be true.

• alexander was younger than hephaestion, infamously remained beardless, and was physically smaller, which means that if macedonians followed southern sexual mores, and if alexander and hephaestion in particular even cared about bringing social politics into the bedroom (see how many variables?) then alexander would’ve bottomed 

pretty okay evidence: character extrapolation 

• i’ve had a prof bring up in class the fact that alexander was too soft for his parents, who worried he was effeminate, which we can safely interpret as “worried he was a bottom” – playing the lyre, not wanting to get it on with anyone in a way befitting a red-blooded macedonian guy, sleeping with the iliad under his pillow, other assorted twink activities. from his annoying high-pitched voice to the fact that he started dressing persian – seen as effeminate to macedonians – it’s pretty much accepted that he was an effeminate dude in his day. not conclusive, definitely problematic as being indicative of sexual position preference, but it is an argument i have seen.

not-really evidence but a component relevant to our discussion of the insidious crawl of unintentional historiography: 

• mary renault ran amok with the bottom/top thing in her books and made alexander finally topping and becoming a “man” into a whole arc in the persian boy, and it’s a fairly pervasive narrative in historical fiction that he’s a somewhat effeminate bottom. this isn’t historical evidence, but it shows how the narrative shifts – this interpretation, so widely distributed in fiction, is now undeniably present in our shared consciousness. (my joke post, which was geared toward an audience of like literally one person, was more about this.)

a final note is that people are just people, and we tend to forget that when we get so caught up in how fun it is to study ancient cultures. but at the end of the day, no matter the mores of their location and period, people are gonna fuck how they want, where they want, who they want, and when they want. like any other pair of young guys getting it on, i’d bet you ten bucks, realistically, that they switched. 

(source 1)
(source 2

Birthday Boy - Draco x Reader


Hey guys! In celebration of our favorite boy’s birthday on the 5th, I decided to write a birthday imagine!! It’s a bit long, but I hope you guys enjoy it! Let me know what ya think! Thank you!!!!

Warnings - None that I am aware of!!! 



“HAPPY BIRTHDAY BABE!” Y/N yelled as she jumped on to Draco’s bed.

 He groaned and rolled over on to his stomach. Pulling the blankets off of him, she straddled his back. Leaning down, she placed a gentle kiss behind his ear. He let out a soft sigh in response. Taking it as a sign to continue, she pressed another one at the back of his hairline and continued down the back of his neck.



“Draco, get up. We have a busy day and I’m trying to make this your best birthday ever - which I know seems impossible since last year’s was pretty great, but this one will be the best one yet, I promise.” Y/N whispered as she pressed her hands into his back.

With Y/N moving her hands - and mouth - up and down his shoulders and back, this was was the most relaxed Draco had been in days. Between maintaining his “bad boy” image and dealing with whatever his father needed him to do, Draco had slipped into a minor depression - not that he’d tell anyone. But the only thing that ever came close to making him relax and see the good in the world was her. 



“I don’t want to.” Draco mumbled and closed his eyes tighter.


“I know that, Draco. But I have a whole day planned so get up and get dressed.” She placed another kiss behind his ear and the dormitory door swung open. Y/N jumped and Draco swung his head towards the door.

“Happy birthday, Draco!” Pansy shouted, dragging a tired looking Blaise behind her.

Draco groaned and his head found its way under his pillow.

“I thought I told you guys to wait downstairs.” Y/N rolled her eyes and swung herself off of Draco.

Pansy crossed her arms and cocked a hip.

“You were taking too long. I’m ready to get this day started!”

“Okay, okay! Draco, please get up and get dressed. Wear something casual, alright? We’ll be downstairs.” Y/N said and ushered Blaise and Pansy out of the room.


They only had to wait thirty minutes for Draco to finally drag himself down the long steps and into the Slytherin common room. He was wearing a black t-shirt and a pair of dark black pants and although Y/N had known Draco for years, she still got butterflies when she saw him. He slung on arm around her, pulling her close, and planted a kiss on her temple. She smiled.

“Where to first then?” Draco asked.

The hike to Hogsmeade wasn’t as bad in June as it was in December - mainly because it wasn’t snowing. It didn’t take the four of them long to reach their first stop in the town. Y/N led the way with Draco holding her hand and following closely behind her. She stopped at the little station in front of the building.

“Hi, I have a reservation for four under the name Malfoy at ten?” she informed the girl behind the station. The girl smiled at the four of them and her eyes lingered a little too long on a certain platinum haired boy.


“Of course, follow me!” she exclaimed and led the four of them to their table.



 “Malfoy, huh?” Draco smirked down at his girlfriend and gently elbowed her in the ribs.


“For you. It was the only way they’d let me make a reservation.” she whispered back.


“How’d you do it? Did you take a polyjuice potion? Or did you just tell them you’re my mom? Did you take my last name as your own? Tell them we’re married? What’d you do?”


“I’m not admitting what I did or didn’t do to you, Draco. Assume what you will, but if I told you, I’m afraid I’d have to kill you.”

Draco chuckled and pulled out the chair for Y/N as they reached their table. Blaise did the same for Pansy and the boys sat down across from each other.

“Is this breakfast all you have planned today, Y/N?” Draco inquired while he stretched an arm around the back of her chair. Y/N shook her head left to right as she looked over the menu that had appeared in front of each of them.

“This is all she has planned with us, anyway.” Pansy muttered. Draco shot Y/N a questioning look then turned to Pansy.

“What do you mean by that, Pansy?” he asked.


“I mean that after this, you guys are going to explore Hogsmeade some more while Blaise and I go back to Hogwarts.”

The four teenagers enjoyed their breakfast. They sat and talked about big upcoming exams and how none of them really felt prepared for them - but did they ever? The four talked of their summer plans and how now that Voldemort was officially back, were they all coming back next year? Or were they staying home to help out their families? None of them knew for sure exactly what would happen. After an hour or so of dreary conversation, Y/N made them change the topic. This was a birthday breakfast after all.

The group finished their meals and went their separate ways. Draco held Y/N’s hand tightly as they went in and out of shops. She insisted on buying him something, but there was no way he was letting her do that.

Draco Malfoy was not very fond of his birthday. The only reason Y/N knew about it was because they had celebrated it a couple times when they were kids. Y/N took it upon herself to continue to make his birthdays a big deal once they got to Hogwarts. He wasn’t sure why she was so insistent on the topic. He didn’t understand. He was just a year older - no big deal.

Y/N led Draco to a small and quiet cafe. She knew he hated his birthday, but that’s the exact reason she made it such a big deal. To her, Draco had made it another year alive and for that, she was eternally grateful. She didn’t understand why he liked to sweep it under the rug. He hated presents and he hated surprises. She did both for him. She pulled out the box she had been hiding in her sweater pocket.

“I got this for you. Don’t say anything Draco, please. I wanted to do this for you. You’re my boyfriend and I love you. I know you hate presents, but I just had to.” she explained and set the small box down on the table. Draco eyed her then slid it to him.

Inside the box was a plain black ring. From far away, it looked extremely simple. Up close, though, it was carved with extremely intricate designs. There were swirls and snakes and when the light hit it just right, you could see the fangs on the snakes’ teeth. Picking it out of the box, the sun caught on some silver writing on the inside of it. He noticed his initials carved next to Y/N’s. His eyes filled with tears, but he held them back. This gift was automatically better than everything that Draco had ever been given.

“Is it okay? Do you like it? I know it’s not much, and you might think it’s stupid, but my family knows a guy who makes jewelry and such, and I asked him to make it for you. There’s a protection spell on it, so whenever you’re in danger, it sends a signal to a necklace I have back in my room and I’ll know you’re in trouble. It also protects you from any harm or at least-“

Y/N’s rambling was cut short by Draco’s lips on hers. His hands slid to her cheeks. He tried to convey how extremely grateful he was to have her in his life through that kiss. She pulled back a little and smiled.

“So you like it then? I know it’s kind of girly but-”


 “Of course I do, babe. Don’t worry. This is the best thing I’ve ever gotten and I’m so glad you care enough about me to at least try and make my birthday a special day. I love you so much, Y/F/N Y/L/N.” Draco whispered.

“I love you too.” she kissed him briefly again. “It’s time for your next activity, are you ready to come on an adventure with me?”

“Every day is an adventure with you. Let’s go.”

Y/N led Draco back to Hogwarts. They held hands and Draco glared at everyone that looked at the pair. Y/N made it seem like she was oblivious to this fact, but she secretly liked that Draco got so easily agitated. It made people leave them alone. It also helped that he was a Malfoy and people feared the Malfoys.

As they climbed staircase after staircase, Draco’s curiosity got the best of him. They’d passed the Room of Requirement and they had definitely passed the Slytherin common room.

At the sixth floor, Y/N made a right and continued down a long, dark hallway. About halfway down the hall, she stopped and entered a classroom. It looked like it hadn’t been used in years. There was dust everywhere and a strange machine sat in the middle of the room. Y/N let go of Draco’s hand and he stayed where he was.

Y/N pressed the ‘on’ button of the projector and it roared to life. The lightbulb flickered once before gaining its strength to steady out. She pointed it at a wall while the opening credits of a movie played.

“What is that?” Draco asked skeptically.


“It shows movies or uh - moving pictures with sound, I guess. A couple of muggles showed it to me two years ago. I wanted to show you my favorite one.” she answered quietly, trying to gauge her boyfriend’s reaction.

“That’s a muggle device then?”

“Yes.”

Draco crossed the room until he was standing in front of his girlfriend.

“Oh, Y/F/N Y/L/N, if my father only knew how much of a bad girl you really are.” he smirked and pulled out his wand.

With a flick and a swish, there was a pile of blankets and pillows on the floor. Snacks were piled by a corner of the blankets. The room looked sparkling clean. Y/N smiled and dropped onto the pile of blankets. Draco sat next to her and pulled her close. He wasn’t normally so easily convinced to do anything muggle related, but if Y/N liked it then it couldn’t be too bad.

Five hours and two movies later, Draco was whining as Y/N pulled him from the room. He pulled on her hand and tried to make her go back into that quiet and relaxing room with him, but she wouldn’t budge. She just kept leading him back down several flights of stairs. They reached the Slytherin common room and stopped right outside the door.

“Don’t get mad at me.” Y/N breathed. Draco rose an eyebrow and muttered the new password.

“SURPRISE!” a big group of people shouted.

Draco stopped just inside the door with Y/N following closely behind him. He hadn’t expected anything like this - not that he minded though. Draco Malfoy was always up for a good party. He smiled and waved as everyone went back to whatever it was they had been doing before the couple had entered the room. He turned around to his girlfriend.

“Why on earth would I be mad at you?” he asked as he wrapped his arms around her waist. Y/N leaned back a little and looked up into Draco’s blue eyes.

“I know you don’t like doing big things for your birthday, but I just had to, babe. I wanted you to be able to celebrate with all of your friends - not just me.” she explained.

He kissed her forehead, then her nose, then kissed her lips.

“Happy birthday, dude! Why didn’t you tell us?” Theodore Nott interrupted as he strode up to the couple. Draco disentangled from Y/N. He settled for his arm around her shoulders.

“I don’t know, Theo. I just don’t think it’s a big deal.” Draco explained. Theo rolled his eyes and made his way to one of the drink tables.

Draco and Y/N pushed and shoved through the crowd and to the couches. They hadn’t had a decent conversation since they’d stepped in the place. Everyone wanted to wish Draco Malfoy a happy birthday. The couch was their usual hangout at parties in the Common Room and sure enough their were two seats left open.

After several hours of drinking and party games, everyone decided to head up to bed. In doing so, they also left the place a complete mess. Draco and Y/N had barely moved from their spot on the couch. The lights had gone out and they were sitting in front of the fire place enjoying the now quiet atmosphere. Her head was in his lap and he was playing with her hair.

“So tell me Draco Malfoy, did you enjoy you birthday party?” Y/N murmured.


 “If only because I got to spend it with you, love.” he whispered back.

“Please stop being cheesy for one second and be honest. Was your birthday everything and more?”

“Of course it was. Thank you for the best birthday ever,” he paused to lean down and kiss her cheek. “and for being the best girlfriend ever. I love you, Y/F/N Y/L/N.”

“I love you too, Draco Malfoy.”

They left the cleaning to the house elves and the two fell into a peaceful sleep on the couch in the Slytherin Common Room.

oH MY gOD

This actually fucking happened today

I was shopping with some family friends and there was me, my mom, two other kids, and their parents. I was wearing casual clothes. Jeans, a shirt and my hair was tied up in a messy bun. I was bored, hands in my pockets and shit. Only, i was wearing  A RAINBOW SHIRT BC IM BI IN HIDING AND ONE KID SAID “why are you wearig a shirt like that haha you’re not gay” and I just looked at him dead straight in the eyes and asked “how would you know?” and his dad is a pastor and he gave me a startled look. i screamed internally. IT GOT WORSE. A CUTE GIRLS WALKED BY AND WAS WEARING A LGBT SHIRT AND SHE WAS CUTE SO I MADE A BIG SHOW BY WINKING AT HER AND SHE GOT SO FLUSTERED IT WAS CUTE AS FUCK AND SUDDENLY I REMEMBERED. I WHIRLED AROUND TO LOOK AT THE OTHERS AND THEY ALL LOOKED MORTIFIED WHILE MY MOM WAS LIKE “GOD DAMMINT DIMITRA”

Slip Of The Tongue

Pairing/Characters: College Bad Boy AU!Bucky Barnes x Reader
Warnings:
angsty as fuckkkkk
Summary:
Being best friends with Bucky Barnes was difficult but it gets even more difficult when he admits his feelings towards you after an eventful night.
Word Count:
1.8k+
A/N:
This ain’t that good

Originally posted by minmiin1d

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Gun - S.P

Originally posted by riverdales-daily

Originally posted by twelvevo

MASTERLIST

~~


Dimly lit lights hinged to the ceiling were lighting up the small corner store. You held hands with your boyfriend, Sweet Pea, as fangs trudged along. You picked out a pack of gum, paying the 50 cents, then hoping a piece of the gum in your mouth. You made a joke as you left,the broken bell rattling above, as Sweet Pea and Fangs laughed. It was cold outside, and you pulled yourself into the serpent jacket sweet pea had let you borrow.

Something was off, as you heard the rattle of something else. Sweet Pea and fangs rushed over quickly to the boy with flaming spray paint and flaming hair.

“Hey! What the hell are you doing?” Sweet Pea spoke.

“Back off. I’m not here for you” the boy mumbled, trying to get a perfect circle.

“Oh, yeah Then who’s this message for, huh? Aw, hell, don’t tell me it’s for the Black Hood. You believe this guy?”

“And people say we’re trouble makers” you spoke, glaring at the boy.

“And who the hell would you be you don’t look like a serpent” 

Sweet pea put his arm around you waist, angered.

“Fuck off dude. This is Southside’s Serpent country. You can’t come here, be an ass and tag our turf. So why don’t you get your ass back to the Northside before someone gets hurt?”

Sweet pea reached into the pocket of your, well his, jacket and pulled out a small switch blade. Flicking the blade right by the northsiders face.

“ Get out of my way, or someone will get hurt” the redhead spoke.

Sweet Pea grinned, god he was hot; “You just made a big mistake”

In one fluid motion the boy put his hand in his backpack and grabbed a pistol.

“Who made a mistake? Who made a mistake?” He shouted, aiming the gun at you, your eyes wide, you held onto sweet peas hand.

“What the hell? Come on, let’s go.” Sweet pea, you and fangs turned quickly, running for shelter froths lunatic. Sweet Pea pushed you in font of him, because hell, he could never forgive himself if you got hurt.

‘Hot Guy’ Part Four

Summary: It’s finals week, and that means lots and lots of studying in the library. However, a certain stranger keeps distracting you from your studying. (College Alternate Universe, Possible Drabble Series)

Previous Part: Part Three

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Words: 999 (YOOOO, that was a close call! Still a drabble.)

Originally posted by dailyteamcap

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My ECCC Experience

Warning – This turned into a book. I will put the bulk under a cut.

 Well, what a weekend that was. I see many people have shared their experiences & I wasn’t going to cause I didn’t want to be repetitive (plus I hate writing), but what the hell – here we go.

 It all started on Thursday night when my husband & I checked in at the Sheraton & then headed over to The Whisky Bar to meet up w/ about 25 other fans for whisky tasting & general mayhem. It was such a blast to meet other fans in the flesh & everyone was so lovely.

 Friday was very long & tiring, but also quite exhilarating. It started with waiting 3 ½ hours in line for the panel in VERY tight & warm conditions, but a good number of people had to wait in the cold rain, so I won’t complain. We ended up in the 8th row on the center aisle. We had a perfect view of the stage, but a bit far for any great pics from my camera phone, but I’ll share a couple here anyway.

 Since everyone saw the panel already, I won’t get into that except to say it was absolutely marvelous. Sam & Cait were glorious live & the energy in the room was palpable. Everything they said is pretty much a blur & I still need to rewatch it to make it all real.

 We went straight to the autographs after the panel, but they were already capped off, so we hung out for a bit & then headed to our dual photo-op w/ Sam & Cait. The organization was a complete shit-show and they had no idea what they were doing. We were moved all over the place & then smooshed all together against the wall to wait again while they figure it out. After about an hour, they got it together & we were on our way to stand in line.

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A Friendly Favour (M)

Originally posted by taehyyungs

Warning: Smut. Semi-not really-kind of infidelity.

“Absolutely not.” You said sternly, pulling the dishcloth that hung from the string of your apron and swiping the crumbs from the counter into your palm, tossing them mindlessly into the trash bin.

“Why not?” Taehyung whined, one cheek bulging with unchewed French toast.

You squinted at him, your elbows supporting you on the countertop when you leaned closer to him, “Because I don’t want to have sex with you, Taehyung.”

He swallowed the large bite of food with effort, “Do it for me,” he begged around the straw of his milk tea, “I am going on my third date with Yura this weekend and she’s been hinting at some stuff. I don’t wanna go in and make a fool of myself.”

“So, the only way to ensure that doesn’t happen is if I sleep with you, right?” You deadpanned.

“You’re one of my closest friends!”

“So?” You scoffed.

“So,” Taehyung continued, “You’re the only girl I’m close enough to that I would trust with something like this. And…” He started, but instantly clamped his mouth shut, looking away from you to focus on stirring his drink.

“And?” You pressed.

“And…” He trailed off, bringing the straw to his lips, but you reached out and snatched the glass from him, giving him an expectant glare.

“And Yoongi’s said some things…” He muttered in a rush.

“What things?” Your voice rose louder than you intended, earning you several glances from different patrons and a few of the waiting staff. You cleared your throat, ducking your head closer to Taehyung to try and hide the blush that no doubt coloured your cheeks.

Taehyung fidgeted in his seat, his fingers tapping the edge of the countertop, “Okay, don’t be mad.”

You just looked at him, and he nodded in understanding before continuing, “I was talking to him like a week ago, and I was asking him about what to do, you know, if things with Yura escalated. And he made references to when you two were together…”

“Oh my God.” You groaned, your hand coming up to cradle your face.

“It wasn’t anything bad!” He waved his arms frantically, as if to lessen the blow, “He just gave me some advice, and he said you were really, um, good?”

“Please stop talking.” You peeked at him through your fingers.

Taehyung nodded again, his lips pressing into a thin line and he watched his fingers. You admired him for a second, your smile hidden behind your hand because he looked positively dejected and completely adorable. You were almost contemplating agreeing with his proposal and you wanted to smack yourself to come back to your senses.

Seconds ticked by; Taehyung remaining silent as you just watched him. Your mind was teetering back and forth, arguing with yourself on whether this was a harmless request, or if it was just going too far. On the one hand, you didn’t want to create any awkwardness between the two of you, you valued your friendship with him too much. On the other hand, he was very obviously attractive, and he only made it sound like it was a one time thing. Another small part of you also may have been thinking about getting back at your ex-boyfriend for gossiping about something as personal as your sex life.

“Okay, I have some conditions,” You said finally, dropping your hand to the counter with a thud. Taehyung perked up instantly, his eyes wide with excitement. “This happens once, okay. That’s it. You don’t get to tell anyone about it. And lastly, after this happens, everything goes back to normal.”

“YesOkayWhatever!” Taehyung cheered in a rush, rising out of his seat so quickly that the stool skidded behind him. He threw his arms around you over the counter, peppering kisses to your cheek.

You struggled in his hold, trying to wedge your hands between your bodies to pry him off of you, but it was no use. Finally, with a particularly firm jab to his ribs with your two fingers, he released you with a grunt.

“So,” He started, his hand rubbing against his sore spot as he looked at any point in the restaurant that wasn’t your face, “When do we do this?”

You shrugged a shoulder, “When’s your date?”

“Tomorrow,” He blinked, eyes finally settling on you.

Your eyes narrowed before slipping closed, tipping your head back with a long sigh, “Then I guess it would have to be tonight.”

“Someone’s eager, hm?” He taunted, waggling his eyebrows suggestively.

You balled the dishcloth in your hand and flung it at him, hitting him square in the face. Taehyung swatted the cloth away, throwing it to the ground and almost knocking over his drink in the process. “Rude.” He grumbled.

You flashed a quick smile that didn’t meet your eyes, “I’ll be by your place at seven. Get out of here before I change my mind.”

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7 kisses;

member- yoongi

genre- fluff, smidge of angst, lovey-dovey

words- 1, 818

summary- kisses are a way of showing love, and you and yoongi know that best

a/n- HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY HEART, MIN YOONGI. i love him so much :’) it’s also @bangtanshopex‘s (aka tina!) birthday!! go wish her a happy bday ❤ this scenario is also based off of ed sheeran’s song kiss me.  i love ed sheeran, definitely check him out if you haven’t!! his new album is amazing!

Originally posted by sugagifs

settle down with me, cover me up, cuddle me in 

The night was cool, with the chirping of crickets echoing throughout the room. A gentle breeze flowed through your bedroom window, causing you to shiver slightly as you pulled your comforter closer to your chest.

“You’re too far away,” Yoongi mumbled against his pillow. You felt his cold fingers grab hold of your wrist as he whined. “Come closer.”

With a grin, you rolled over and fit yourself against Yoongi’s body. Warmth immediately encompassed you and you sighed happily. His arm instantly found purchase wrapped around your waist, his hand resting on the small of your back lightly. He hummed in content as he breathed in your scent.

“Did you miss me?” you whispered. Days when your boyfriend was away were always hard, but you cherished the ones when he came back.

He gently dragged his nose across yours, giving you a sweet Eskimo kiss. “Always, my dear.”

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Peter Parker Imagine

Requested: Anonymous

Imagine:  can you do a peter parker imagine where you’re going to a haunted house with peter and some friends. peter didn’t want to go at first but when he heard you were going, he was in. you all go to the haunted house and a guy in the group was flirting with you trying to act all manly and brave and stuff. peter gets really jealous and wants you all to himself so he ‘accidentally’ locks you in the same room as him. he confesses his feelings with you and you confess yours. thx so much i love ur writing!

A/N: thanks anon! you are a sweetie!! || it’s long ;3

Warning: None


 You walked around the corner with a smile on your face and your hair in perfect condition. You’ve been looking for Peter for the past five minutes, you wanted him to see how good you looked today. As you looked around, you spotted him talking with your friends. You gave yourself a silent, ‘yes!’ of excitement. He was talking with your friends, which was a good sign because they were your excuse to talk with Peter.

 You fix your hair up one last time and take a deep breath. Before you knew it, you were off. When you reached the group, Peter was the first one to greet you. Everybody greeted you afterwards, you glanced at Peter who kept staring at you. You were freaking out on the inside, he must’ve thought you looked good.

‘’So.. What were you guys talking about?’’ you ask, trying to spark up a conversation.

‘’Oh. We were inviting him to going to the haunted house with us tomorrow, but he doesn’t want to go.’’ judy explains.

‘’Yeah. Haunted houses aren’t really my thing.’’ peter shrugs.

‘’Aw man, that’s to bad. I was going to go tomorrow night.’’ you sigh.

 Peter gasped in surprise. He pulled out his phone almost immediately and started to tap his fingers rapidly on his screen. Everybody in the group exchanged glances, wondering what he was doing. Peter soon threw his phone back into his pocket and looked up at you.

‘’I actually had plans for tomorrow night that’s why I couldn’t go. But it seemed that they cancelled the plans so I’m free. I’ll go.’’ peter says.

‘’But I thought you said haunted houses weren’t real-’’

‘’Forget what I said! I’ll be there!’’ peter exclaims.

 Before you could respond, the bell rang and Peter ran off into the big crowd that was forming. You watched as he rushed off, you bit your lip and smiled. He was going and it was going to be a blast.

‘’Y’know Y/N. I think he’s just going because you’re going.’’ judy comments.

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What’s Your Fantasy? ~ smut

Author: completedylantrash

Characters: Stiles x Reader x Derek

Rating: NSFW 18+ EXPLICIT SMUT ~ Threesome (no m/m)

Word Count: 3836

A/N: This is strictly m/f threesome. No Sterek up in this bitch (sorry not sorry, I’m greedy and I want all the attention) 



“Stiles,” I croon, placing the half folded copy of Cosmo on the bed, looking down to where he sits on the floor amongst the scattered copies of research he’s immersed in.

“Hmm?” He hums as he reads, his eyes darting back and forth over the page.

“Tell me one of your fantasies,” I turn on my side, resting my head on my hand.

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Cake By the Ocean

Min Yoongi/ Suga X Reader 

So this is low-key (high-key?) for @fluffygummy-yoonmin who legit asked me for Yoongi/Noona smut a thousand years ago. I’m sorry it took me so long! I just wanted to do it right and I hope you enjoy!

Oh, and it’s just under 8k words. Sooo yeah. 

Originally posted by jiminrolls

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