Wait but hear me out

  • ravenclaws that hate studying and procrastinate every assignment
  • hufflepuffs that curse like sailors and that look like they could definitely fuck you up if they wanted to
  • slytherin that are really nice and sweet who constantly ask how your days going and if you need help with something
  • gryffindor that are scared to kill the spider in the corner of their rooms because who knows if that shit can fly or if it’ll attack you  
The signs as Garrus quotes
  • Aries: Just followed your example, Shepard. Yell loud enough, and someone will eventually come over to see what all the fuss is about.
  • Taurus: I’m all for second chances. Not so sure about third ones.
  • Gemini: We can disobey suicide orders? Why wasn’t I told? That’s about twice a day.
  • Cancer: Ha-ah! Don't make me laugh, damn it. My face is barely holding together as it is. Ah, probably for the best. Everyone was always ignoring you and hitting on me. Time for you to get a fair shot at it.
  • Leo: Am I the only one who misses the little conversations we used to have in the Elevators a few years ago...?
  • Virgo: I’ve never considered cross-species intercourse. And damn, saying it that way doesn’t help. Now I feel dirty and clinical.
  • Libra: It’s so easy to see the galaxy in black and white. Gray? I don’t know what to do with gray.
  • Scorpio: I’d wait, if you’re okay with it. Disrupt the crew as little as possible… and take that last chance to find some calm just before the storm. You know me. I always like to savor the last shot before popping the heat sink.... Wait. That metaphor just went somewhere horrible.
  • Sagittarius: It’ll either be a night to treasure, or a horrible interspecies awkwardness thing.
  • Capricorn: I’m Garrus Vakarian and this is now my favorite spot on the Citadel!
  • Aquarius: If this ends with the both of us dying in a giant explosion killing a Reaper, just remember. I took the kill shot.
  • Pisces: Glad to know my romantic…..uh……skills made an impression, because it’s going to take more than the Reapers to come between this cross-species liaison.