hi! so my friend asked me a while ago what I was (gay straight bi) and I was like 'idk not really anything? I'm not sure that stuff kinda grosses me out' and then fast forward a few months to a sleepover party with gossip stuff and someone says 'ok (name) who would you want to sleep with?' and before I could say anything my friend says 'no (my name) isn't into that stuff.' but I was like 'hey you outed me' and they said 'whatever not like it's a real thing to be outed for' can I still be upset?
Yes! Absolutely you can still be upset! Being outed as asexual (or any sexuality) can put the individual at risk or cause others to look at them differently when they’re not prepared for it. It’s a huge thing to come out as ANY sexuality and others should not do it for you!
I had this happen to me as well and I was really upset at the individual who did it. There’s a pretty good chance that her telling the other person cost me a job (I can’t be 100% certain because they would never admit that that’s why they didn’t hire me).
Your friend is wrong about it not being a real thing to be outed for. Asexuality is real, just like any other sexuality. And just like any other sexuality, it is the individual’s choice about if and who they come out to.