who even comes up with this words

A Silmarillion fanfic, chapter eleven

Chapter summary: Tuilindien gives her presentation, and Carnistir asks for advice from the one brother who hasn’t been irritating him lately.

Story summary: Sometimes your heart chooses for you before you even know there is a choice to make, and then all that can be done is find out whether love can build bridges across differences and fears. This is my story of how Caranthir comes to be married, with Caranthir’s family members alternately helping and hindering his attempts at courting.

Rating: Teen and up audiences; Chapter length: ~5,800 words

Tag-type thingies for the whole story: years of the trees, romance, falling in love, family, courtship, anger management issues, the Noldor, the Vanyar, some fluff and some angst

Chapter notes: We know very little about architecture and city planning in Valinor so you can’t blame me for inaccuracy for writing the Eldar having their scientific conference (the colloquium) in an amphitheatre. Amphitheatres are cool.

(Also posted on AO3 etc.)

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Chapter XI // Conference, conciliation and consultation

A week is a very long time, Carnistir discovers, when one only looks forward to a single hour of every day and spends the rest of the time trying to make one’s infuriatingly obstinate father change his mind.

It all goes well, though. Having lunch with Tuilindien every day is wonderful, wherever they eat. On three days they spend their shared lunch hour at the park closest to the library, eating food Carnistir purchased from the marketplace. He likes those days best as they offer a sense of informality and intimacy that he enjoys much more than the refined atmosphere of the finest eateries of Tirion.

He doesn’t even mind it very much when Tuilindien’s younger sister joins them for one of the lunches in the park.

‘I’m so sorry, Carnistir’, Tuilindien whispers to him when the younger girl is absorbed in examining the fried vendace Carnistir brought for today’s meal. 'I didn’t mean to spoil our time together, but Lirulinë just left her in the library and told the librarians that I would look after her. I couldn’t leave her there alone. I have no idea what Lirulinë was thinking – she knew I was meeting you.’

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anonymous asked:

oh gosh if you think of the title literally, it pointed Zeno by means of his body can't be cut. But if the title is about tenacity, anyone can say it like what you said, and we still have other injured charas like Kija, Jaeha or Neguro, they can say it like being determined on not giving up even tho they're in bad conditions. For some reason i wanna think it's Jaeha bcoz he's the most injured, and saying an encourage words will make at ease the others, but whatever.. I'm so hype!!!

Yeah the first that comes to mind when talking about “inflexible body” is Zeno. Still on the physical aspect, we have Neguro who was wounded last chapter acting like a shield for Kouren and I could picture him saying that if Kouren & co are worried for him.
I don’t think it has to do with the injured dragons, as I believe most of this chapter will be about finding the culprit (so probably more interactions with Gobi, although the dragons might be freed in the process and help in the chase).
If the title isn’t about one’s body but one’s will/state of mind, then Kouren or Yona would be likely candidates. I definitely hope it’s Kouren.

Ten Things Trans Men Want You To Know

By Jason Robert Ballard

Over my life as a transgender man I have had moments I wish I could have said something to someone close to me but failed to. Until going back in time is an option, lets move forward with better understanding on things we wish we could tell our close friends and potential partners. If you’ve received this article from a friend, are they trying to tell you you’re guilty of one of these points? Potentially, or they just think it was a good read and you might enjoy it.

1. You’re guilty by association
You will receive more questions about me than I will. People who are confused or curious will typically ask a person they believe can relate to them or think share similar experiences. Talk to me about what I’m comfortable with you sharing when you field these questions. If I prefer not to be outed, you could respond with a simple, yet firm “It’s not my place to answer these questions for you, I’m sorry.” If I’m open about my transition, find out how to appropriately answer or divert harsh questions. This will make you a better ally and allow conversations to flow toward critical discussions instead of focusing on sexualizing the experience. As the topic of transgender lives emerges in mainstream media, questions often fall into one of two categories “genuine curiosity” or “superficial curiosity”. The question, “What are some reasons a transman might not have bottom surgery” is different from the question “Do you have a penis?“ Knowing whether the questioner is coming from a place of good will or being malicious may help you decide how to handle these moments.

2. “But you’ll always be _____ to me” hurts
Transition in life is inevitable. While seeing your little cousin for the first time in years and enjoying the fact that they were once in diapers, one may say “Aw, but you’ll always be little tommy to me!” and be perfectly acceptable. However, in my case I may have struggled with who I was and how I felt about myself before coming out as the authentic me. This is a time in my life of positive growth and happiness and if I’ve chosen to share it with you, telling me that you’d rather remain seeing me as someone I have taken great risks to leave behind is hurtful and damaging to our friendship. Telling me I’ll always be my birth name or birth sex in your eyes can be like telling someone who struggled with depression that you’ll always see them as ‘that pathetic emo kid’ or someone who fought with self image and weight lose that they’ll always be ‘fat’ to you. See what I’m saying? Yes, we may have a long history of knowing each other before I came out and that might be hard for you to let go of or see differently. Let me know you’re trying by not using this statement.

3. Outing me can be extremely dangerous.
As positive as some of the media and support for trans people are, there is still an overwhelming amount of hatred and ignorance. Hundreds of transgender people are murdered every single year and most of these times the killer walks due to failed/no protection laws in place for me. You may think that having a trans friend and talking about it in a public setting is fine, but if the wrong person over hears you or tells their friend who tells their friend, I could be in serious danger. It being a novelty to have a trans friend isn’t worth my life. If you want to talk about it, just don’t use my name and say you’ve ‘got a friend’.

4. My dysphoria isn’t your fault
It can be tough to be emotionally involved with someone who has a hard time with self image. You yourself may feel like you’re solely responsible for their happiness but sometimes their sadness comes from a place you simply can’t touch. It is not your fault that I have places and things about my body that I don’t like paid attention to. Talk to me and find out what is okay with me and what you can do to ease any triggering of my dysphoria, but don’t take the dysphoria personally. Some relationships, trans or cis don’t end up being ‘text book’. If I’m uncomfortable with my breasts and talk about wanting surgeries in the future, being sad about that and saying things like “But I love your boobs!” or “No don’t, I love you just the way you are” isn’t supportive. In fact, it’s proof that you’ve created an image of me in your head that doesn’t match up with who I really am and that’s not a positive basis for a relationship.

5. “It isn’t the T”
Beginning hormone replacement therapy can be a HUGE moment in my life. However, following that achievement I may lash out at you or be a jerk. If I say things like “It’s the testosterone”, you have my permission to not believe it. I am well aware of the emotional changes that I’ve decided to undertake and there are countless support systems and advice articles for dealing with extra tension and shorter tempers all over Google. My mood swings and hormonal imbalance are mine to control, not yours to tolerate. I have no right to be rude to you or push you away and blame a substance.

6. How do those egg shells feel?
Don’t get so hung up on words that the conversations never happen. You know me, if we’ve been close for any period of time you know what and how to phrase questions and statements to not be offensive. Though I may not want to be an educator all day every day to strangers at the grocery store, you’re my friend and it shows me you care when you’re excited about my transition with me. Many transgender people don’t have or lose their entire support systems when they come out so I’m lucky to have you. If you’ve been around the web a time or two you’ll notice our community gets hung up on terms and words. Don’t let this frighten you into bailing on me.

7. Don’t date me despite me
If you’re interested in dating me, make sure you’re interested because of who I am, not despite my trans status. You’re not doing me a favor by being interested in me ‘even though’ I’m trans, you’re making it seem like to you it’s something that makes me hard to handle or below you and THANK GOODNESS you’re here now to be interested in me because who else would? Rude.

8. What you say behind my back is what you really think of me
When I first come out, some people might say things like “It’s about time” or “I always knew”, some may say they had no clue and some people might not believe me due to the rise of something called “trans-trending”. Whether you think I’m doing this for attention or because my friend is doing it too isn’t for you to decide. The locals don’t get to get together and vote to approve my trans status. There is no way for you to tell what has been going on in my mind for years and what I’ve struggled with personally. There are many ways to transition and no one way is perfect or the way it has to be done. Talk to me about it, find out my story if you feel so inclined. If not, just leave it alone because it doesn’t affect your life at all.

9. My pronouns mean a lot to me
Chances are I’ve chosen a new name and have preferred gender pronouns, you using them is a big deal to me and when you do it shows me that you support me in bettering my life for myself. Which should be qualities of all friends! At the beginning, you may slip or mess up but I promise I’ll be able to tell if someone is genuinely trying or if someone is making a point to use the wrong ones.


10. Thank you
If you’ve taken the time to read or share this article with someone close to you, you’ve sought out advice on being a better Trans Ally and that to me is admirable. Wanting to educate yourself to make me and any other transgender person in your life more comfortable in this time of great community and media change is worth a big thank you. There is a lot of anger and hatred in the world and in our small community and sometimes Allys can be pushed to their limits or be afraid to use the wrong words or do the wrong thing. Every single person behind us and in support of us is valuable. Thank you for your patience, your friendship and your love.

[ROA]

Hi there! You’re about to witness a whole lot of word dump up ahead so fasten your seat belt, hold on tight, enjoy the ride!

Note: This is an extremely long post 

101 reasons why Jikook/Kookmin is my ultimate OTP
or 101 times Jikook made my heart flutter

1) When Jungkook tries to find reasonable excuses to hold Jimin’s hands (in which he usually succeeds). Example: A decent round of arm wrestling or a hand massage.

2) It’s nice to know Jungkook isn’t the only one who enjoys the occasion; Jimin does too, even comes up with the most absurd idea (like who arm wrestles while sitting 5ft apart? and knowing he will definitely lose?) urm 128 rounds, 128 losses…

3) The way Jimin ruffles Jungkook’s hair, as if to say “You did well, baby. I’m proud of you” or the way Jungkook leans into Jimin’s touch when he pats his hair.

4) When Jimin asked for kisses from Jungkook, but he panicked and jokingly pushed Jimin away, all the while grinning like the shy boy he used to be.

5) The moment Jimin asked for a peck on the cheek on Jungkook’s birthday but Jungkook just smiled at the camera.

6) When Jungkook softly answered “no” when asked by Jimin if he likes his hyung that much. He just couldn’t resist teasing hyung because of how adorable he would look afterward.

(Time frame: 3:45-4:10)

7) The numerous times Jungkook would wait for Jimin even though he keeps on complaining about Jimin’s sloth-like pace.

8) When they strut around the airport or basically anywhere, side by side. Even when others are way ahead they would take their own sweet time.

Backstage…

After fansign…

and of course, at the airport….

9) Jungkook probably feels that it’s a part of his responsibility to make Jimin happy, so more often than not he would try to joke around and comfort the older, even if it means turning himself into a dork.

10) The glistening look in Jungkook’s eyes whenever Jimin talks in interviews. 

11) When Jungkook made Jimin wear a tiara at a fansign and called him princess.

12) The uniformity of Jimin’s Twitter hashtags when Jungkook is there with him. It’s always #JIMIN and #꾹, making it easier for trash like me to find what I’m looking for haha.

13) Jimin and Jungkook being domestic and sharing soggy cereal in one bowl, using one spoon. Also the many times they share drinks and food.

14) “I will sleep here with Jimin” while pointing at the top bunk of the caravan in Bon Voyage , which, for me, strengthens the possibility of them sleeping together in the dorm. Reminds me of this too: “Everyone, Jungkookie cuddles me to sleep”.

15) When Jungkook suddenly stepped in front of Jimin while he’s talking to apply lip balm on his lips. The hyungs’ reactions were gold. They were stuck to one another like glue the whole broadcast and It hit me hard.

16) The times Jimin said “I Love You” to the camera and Jungkook stared at him like he’s the one being confessed. 👣

17) Jungkook knows his limit when he makes fun of Jimin, always being there for his hyung when insecurity gets the better part of him and I think that’s very, very beautiful. 👣

18) It’s OBLIGATORY for me to include We Don’t Talk Anymore cover by JM and JK here. No explanation needed because I’m sure you feel the same way as I do.

19) When Jungkook waited for Jimin to complete the formation during his part in The Rise of Bangtan in Nanjing, then turned to Jimin and serenaded him.

Serenades Jimin…

Turns to fans…

20) Jungkook knows Jimin, remembers every single thing Jimin does better than the man himself. He’s quick to answer things pertaining to Jimin.

21) When Jimin fell down at Taipei airport, Jungkook wasn’t there because he was filming Flower Crew. He joined them a little while later for their Epilogue On Stage. However, on their way back to Korea, Jungkook made sure to stick close to Jimin and walked by his side until they checked in. The fact that Jungkook was there with him made me cry a little./okay lie/

22) When Jimin took a blanket and a soft, fluffy pillow and tucked Jungkook in, and made sure he’s comfortable enough. Also the fact that Jungkook didn’t even bother waking up and sleeping in the room.

23) The amount of times Jungkook and Jimin hang around with each other, usually accompanied by another member.

  • A date
  • Big Bang Concert with Hoseok
  • At the waterpark with Jin

  • Eating Ramen at Hangang with Namjoon

24) “오~갖고 싶다” (Oh, I want you) That iconic moment in Now3 need I say more.

25) When Jimin hung around behind the camera while Jungkook was getting interviewed. 👣

26) When Jungkook squished behind Jimin when Jimin got his photo taken even though he could’ve gone away and NOT be in the camera.(Fancafe content)

27) When Jimin picked up a slice of cake and fed Jungkook in Bon voyage.

28) Jungkook’s way of carrying Jimin up bridal-style during Limbo game still has me feeling some kind of way, and I will not get tired of seeing it, not anytime soon i bet. (Every time it appears on my feed I’ll stare at it for hours)

29) How Jungkook’s ears perk up whenever Jimin says something. He’s extra attentive when it comes to Jimin. I don’t know if Jimin’s melodic voice gets him or what, cause if it is, boy I feel you. Example: Run! BTS in the US, when Jimin screamed “엄마ㅏㅏㅏㅏㅏ~~~~” (mommy~~) because he’s scared of the roller coaster and Jungkook was like “왜?” (why?)

30) When Jimin laughs an octave higher whenever Jungkook does something funny.

31) The way Jimin sat on Jungkook’s lap and how tight Jungkook pressed him against his chest in Summer Package Dubai.

32) Jungkook didn’t bother about the fans’ parents who sat across him because he needed to make his hyung look good and that was all that mattered.

33) After Jungkook hurt his back at Mama, Jimin took care of him at the airport, gently keeping his hand on Jungkook’s back the whole time they were walking.

34) The fact that Jungkook and Jimin monitor each others’ scenes when they’re filming, waiting around and constantly giving support.

35) When Jungkook and Jimin held hands on stage.

36) The No More Dream lift that has changed over the last couple of years.

37) That moment Jimin made siren sound when Hoseok told everyone that his sister liked Jungkook. I find it cute. (Sukira)

38) When Jimin and Jungkook being lovey-dovey at Manila Airport. 👣

39) Jungkook and Jimin still had their own photoshoot even though they’re both paired up with someone else. Also the iconic “Jeomsoon-ah, please be my baby’s mom” by Park Jimin.

40) Jungkook randomly barging in and interrupting Jimin’s vlive and just….the immense amount of flirting and eye-fucking throughout the whole video…caught me off guard. 👣

41) No matter how many times Jungkook messed around with him, Jimin didn’t have the heart to say stop. He couldn’t say no to Jungkook; that’s how soft he is for the maknae. But yea, speaking quite frankly, Jungkook didn’t even try. There are million other ways to piss someone off but what he did? nope, that’s not how you do it,boy haha. (Run BTS spy episode)

42) And it took 0.000001 sec for Jimin to say thank you to Jungkook. Although Jungkook kept telling him he’s handsome, something he rarely does, Jimin still couldn’t catch on;Still became flustered and shy afterward. It made me asdfjkl. (Undercover mission in Japan)

43) I love Jungkook’s determination. Jk’s inner monologue: I have to make Jimin hyung wear this goddamn headband *gets on his back and forces him to wear it*

44) When Jungkook pinched Jimin’s nipple the instant Jimin went in for a hug lol. (Fancafe content)

45) Jungkook and Jimin have no chills when they’re seated together at fansigning events. They pay attention to each other more than they do to their fans. (don’t get me wrong they still love their fans)

46) When Jimin pretended to be mad at Jungkook for not sitting beside him at a fansign, and how Jungkook played along,claiming his current seat was his original seat when it’s not lol.

47) When Jungkook snatched the snack from Hoseok’s hand for himself, but stopped and gave it to Jimin instead when Jimin asked to be fed.

48) The various times Jimin snakes his slightly smaller hands around Jungkook’s waist and shoulder, and sometimes when it seems that Jimin has difficulty standing after putting his hand on Jungkook’s arm, Jungkook would bend to better accommodate him.

look at him tiptoeing…

49) When Jimin back-hugged Jungkook (and kissed his shoulder from what i saw).

50) The cutest nicknames they gave for one another. 👣

Ooops…

Okay pause. I’m afraid I’ll have to break it down into two parts, as seeing how freaking long this has gotten ahaha. Part 2 will be posted really really soon~~~

A cage of golden glass

Synopsis: There was you. An ordinary human girl, wrong place, wrong time. Then there was Loki. God of Mischief, war criminal. When Thor brings you to Asgard to ensure your safety, there is nobody else you come to hate more passionately than his evil foster brother. Then Odin finally decides on a new and much more effective kind of punishment for Loki, causing your whole world to fall apart. He would simply marry him off to a mortal, someone who is, by all means, “beneath” him. You.

Pairing: Loki x Reader
Rating: M
Chapter: 1/1 (Oneshot)
Words: 7217
Warnings: smut, forced marriage

Read it on AO3!

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Wrong

Originally posted by lumos025

Summary: Jungkook, Jimin and Taehyung bullied you in high school and by some sick joke the universe was playing on you, 2 years later Jungkook was attending the same University as you. Even sicker joke was being stuck with him doing a project on ‘Sex in Cinema’ for a whole semester. Go figure.

Words: 8083

Warnings: Smut, a lot of dirty talk holy shit (I can’t help it), oral, masturbation, overstimulation.

2 years earlier:

You walked down the road, almost around midnight, trying to get home as fast as possible the chilly rainy weather. Not to mention the truck that was trailing behind you and the screams and shouts of “wait up thunder thighs!” and “stop running away like a little bitch!” coming from the 3 boys who occupied it. Wrapping your arms around yourself to feel just an ounce of warmth, you willed yourself to ignore these bastards and walk faster. ‘I’m almost home, I’m almost home’ repeating it like a mantra in your head. Really, it was a stupid idea to think that you could enjoy a last high school party with your friends who were the complete opposite of you. After all, when the three most popular boys of the school were determined to make your life a living hell, why would anyone else want to treat you different in this extremely cliché scenario. It was hard to pinpoint what exactly was it about you that made them hate you so much.

From the time that you can remember, and you remembered a lot, Taehyung, Jimin and Jungkook had always despised you. It’s like they couldn’t stand your existence. When you would be at the library helping out by staying late, they would wait after school, yes they would go out of their way to stay at school longer, to make sure that your walk home was as stressful as possible. Making fun of pretty much anything and everything you did was a normal occurrence. You had just learned to live with it, but not today.

You suddenly started to slow your pace. They are cowards, you thought. What can they possibly do? Always taunting, always calling names, always making you feel shit about anything you took interest in. But they were all talk, right? You thought, huffing out. People like them walk in groups because they can’t actually do anything alone. You don’t know what came over you, but you suddenly stopped and turned around slowly. The truck that the boys were trailing behind you also slowed and stopped a few meters away.

The one driving was Jimin, while Taehyung sat beside him and Jungkook stood, head poking out of the truck’s opening in the ceiling. You stood defiantly, shaking from the growing rain, your hair soaked and hands tightly by your side. Silently daring them to charge the truck towards you. ‘They won’t do it, they’re cowards’ you thought, your confidence growing slowly. You couldn’t tell where this adrenaline rush had come from to give you such courage to finally stand your ground, just a few weeks away from graduation. You could see Taehyung’s cunning, and terrifyingly psychotic grin widening as he relentlessly whispered in Jimin’s ear, whose grip on the wheel was tightening as he looked you right in the eyes. Jungkook was laughing. He apparently found the situation so amusing, that you decided now to grow a spine and challenge them. Suddenly, the sound of the engine revving was as loud as the rain.

It all went pretty much downhill from there. The last thing you remembered was your too loud heartbeat, the bright flash from the truck and Jungkook’s face suddenly forming a horrified expression as if he wasn’t just laughing at you.

Present day:

You weren’t looking for him specifically among the crowd flooding into the lecture hall. But something did happen inside you when you spotted him. A kind of lightness, or a lifting of some heavy part of yourself. Everything was settling into a nice, normal routine. You were going about your daily lives in an ordinary manner, and you were doing it completely separately.

He sat in the fourth row, and you sat at the back. Only now there was no rising sense of dread. You didn’t keep your hand to yourself when the lecturer asked a question. You answered, without the background sound of someone snickering. And even when it felt as though he was looking at you, when you snuck a glance at him you only ever saw the back of his head.

He bent low over his notes, and his head occasionally lifted a little as he really listened to whatever the lecturer was saying. Once or twice you actually caught him nodding, or doing a little staggered-looking half laugh over some ridiculous concept. As if he loved it all now.

He loved it so much he was sometimes at the lectures early. You would come in with Y/B/F, still giggling over something ridiculous, and get the faint prickle that told you he was already there. Only now when it happened it didn’t make you want to cover yourself up, or run and hide. There was nothing to hide from. Everything was going to be super cool and totally fine from here on in. Or it would have been, if it were not for the group project. The one that you were so excited for that you didn’t process it when your lecturer started reading out the names. You would be working with Y/B/F—that was a given. You were going to watch ridiculously filthy movies together and laugh about bobbing butts and ogle Ewan McGregor’s penis.

And then you heard his name.

Followed by yours.

Distantly, like in a dream of being in class.

“Miss Y/L/N, do you have a problem with that assignment?”

Everyone was looking at you now. No—not just looking. Examining, as though You had become a new and baffling species. The girl who was not excited about the idea of spending a whole semester with Jungkook. The creature who seemed horrified at the prospect of working with him. It made it difficult to do anything at all, even with Y/B/F urging you to say yes, yes I do have a fucking problem. Though you still didn’t expect the shake of your head to happen. Just one little accidental shake of your head and that was it. Your lecturer moved on to his next victim, leaving you in something You once had a nightmare about in ninth grade. Working with Jungkook. On a semester-long project.

About sex in cinema.

“Don’t worry, we can fix this. Just go to his office and talk to him privately about it. He would have to be Satan himself to not understand,” You heard Y/B/F whisper. But the words seemed even further away than you name had when your lecturer read it out.

“Right. Right. Yeah. You’re right.”

“I can come with you if you want.”

“No, that’s okay. That’s fine.”

“Are you sure? You look like you’ve been punched. In the face. With a small nuclear blast.”

“I’m sure,” You said, but soon came to regret that firmness in your voice. The steady nod that told Y/B/F it was okay for you to go in a different direction once you were outside. It only meant that you were on your own when you got to the tiny hallway outside your lecturer’s door.

And saw that Jungkook was already waiting. Of course he was—he probably had the same concerns as you. No matter how sorry he was or what he thought of being in the red and being wrong, he would never want to work in close quarters with you for the entire semester. In fact, him being sorry likely made the situation seem worse to him. Most likely he had calculated all the awkward conversations you guys would have to have and how far apart he would have to stand to keep you comfortable, and found it as unbearable as you did.

Even though his expression seemed to say something else.

Oh god. His expression was saying something else.

Then he held up his hands, as though to calm you.

And you knew.

“All right, Y/N, I know that you’re probably thinking it’s way better if you do this project with that gal pal of yours, but wait, okay? I got reasons why this is gonna be fine.”

“Is that seriously why you’re here? To stop me asking to switch us?”

“Well…no. Not stop you exactly. Stop is a really strong word.”

“While I’m glad you’ve learned that—” You said, your voice briefly catching when you saw his wince. He winced, your mind hissed, before you forced yourself to finish. “I still think it covers what’s happening here.”

“I just wanted to talk to you about it for a second. Just, like, hear me out.”

“I want to. I really do. But come on. You know I wasn’t born yesterday. This has all the hallmarks of some kind of trap or prank or joke at my expense.”

“How could it possibly be a trap or prank? He put people together based on…I don’t even know what he put people together based on. But it couldn’t have had anything to do with me.”

You searched his face, looking for the lie. Waiting for him to show some hint of bullshit, beneath those too-kind eyes and his spread hands and the obvious logic of what he was saying.

Only there was nothing, nothing, nothing.

And it made no difference at all.

“Okay, I buy that. I do. Yet the fact still remains: I cannot do a project with you. Ever. You have to know that doing anything like that is completely impossible for me. Right?”

“I was just thinking that maybe…maybe you could give it a chance. You know, now that we’re on speaking terms and everything is almost cool between us.”

“You think everything is cool between us?”

“Well, maybe not cool exactly. More like…okay.”

“Still need to dial it back a notch, chief.”

“Reasonable? Not bad? Kind of semi decent?”

“That last one is getting close.”

He sighed, shoulders sagging.

Relenting, you thought. He’s actually relenting.

“Fine, we are a fucking disaster.”

“Now you’re getting the idea,” You said.

“But I figure we can work on it.”

“By doing a project on sex in the cinema together?”

“Well,” he said. “When you put it like that it sounds dumb.”

“There’s no other way to put it! That is literally what you’re suggesting.”

“Yeah, I get that. I just…want to not get that. I want it to be easier or better or just not the way this is.”

“That could have been my daily prayer in high school, Jungkook.”

He didn’t react the way you expected to, with more weird arguing.

He just closed his eyes.

He closed them like someone had just told him his family had been in a fatal accident.

“I wish I could go back and start over again. More than wish—I would give everything I have to start over again. The wrestling, this scholarship, every party I ever went to and every fun thing I ever did. And you can choose to not believe me about that, but—”

“I believe you.”

“You do?”

“I’m as surprised as you are, but yeah.”

“Then why does this have to be such a big deal?”

You thought of Y/B/F saying attempted murder.

“Y/N that is fucking attempted murder. Babe, you don’t have to feel bad about anything you put him through now. His friends and him included, ran you over with a fucking truck. How much physio and other therapy sessions did you have to go through because of them, huh?”

The terror that used to flood you when he walked down the hall.

That ever-present sensation of a grille barrelling into your body.

“Because understanding that someone is truly sorry and wanting to spend huge amounts of time with them are two different things. I might see that you mean this, and know rationally that I can almost sort of trust you. Maybe I even want it to be that easy, too. But your face is the one I had nightmares about for two years. Your smile doesn’t seem happy to me. I associate it with cruelty.”

You shook your head. Glanced away from him so you didn’t have to see the defeated look on his face.

“It’s hard for me to look at you, Jungkook, no matter how much I appreciate what you’ve done here.”

“That was a really well-thought-out and logically sound speech.”

“I know it was. I’m pretty proud.”

“And I have no argument against it.”

“You don’t need one. What you’ve done here…” You gritted your teeth hard and looked at the ceiling. But this time it didn’t stop the tears. They were already welling up by the time You explained the rest to him.

“It means a lot. And a million men would never have done the same, I can promise you. I don’t have any messages from Jimin on my phone. Taehyung isn’t going to call anytime soon. It’s just you, a rare fantasy in the middle of all this dismal reality.”

He turned around when you were done. All the way around—and then his arms went up to cover his head and you understood. What you said had affected him, strongly. Maybe more than his words had affected you. It took him twice as long to get it together, and even after he had he couldn’t quite look at you. He just kept staring at the wall and clenching his jaw.

And saying things. Oh yeah, he said things, in a strained, shaky voice.

“I meant what I said, you know. That you are the very best.”

“I know. That’s why I’m going to ask you not to say it again.”

“I can’t stop. I have the opposite of whatever idiocy infected me in high school.”

“What, like insane-need-to-compliment fever?”

“Pretty much, yeah,” he said.

“Well it has taken a raging hold of you, let me tell you.”

“I know it seriously cannot be stopped.”

“I think you have a terminal case.”

“Not a bad way to go, if you ask me,” he said, so soft and sincere it took all your strength to stop yourself smiling in response. You could feel your lips trembling. Your cheeks ached with the effort of pinning them down, yet still You knew you were failing. You could see it in his satisfied expression.

And hear it in his words.

“That’s better. Seeing you look happy.”

“I am happy,” You said, then added without thinking: “Are you?”

Of course you didn’t mean anything by it. It was just a polite habit, based on interactions with people other than Jungkook. People who had actual problems, who lived troubled lives, who might answer with a god no. Jungkook would never need to answer with a god no. His life was full of endless possibilities and unfettered glory. He could snap his fingers and have a thousand people follow him to the ends of the earth.

He even looked that way, in the dim light of the narrow hallway between these offices.His hair was the colour of dark chocolate. Every item of clothing suited him perfectly, from the rich grey-blue of his V-neck to the jeans he’d tucked into his timberlands. He exuded cool from every pore; he could have stepped off the cover of a magazine. Yet all you could see was his face as it slowly sagged. It was like watching someone cut the strings that had held a mask in place—a mask you hadn’t known he was wearing. You thought that smiling golden god who had tormented you was the real him, but for a second you couldn’t be sure. Just for one heart-rattling second, and then the door to the office opened and that glimpse of something else was gone—so fast You would imagine later that it had never existed. It was just a trick of the light.

Better to focus on the real and the now.

“What can I do for you two today?” Professor asked.

Then you took a breath and answered.

“Nothing,” You said.

A few weeks later:

After that day, you didn’t know how or why you suddenly decided to give working with him a try, but so far, it was going…. okay. You two met up at the library, took your notes, glancing at each other once in a while, mostly Jungkook, asking each other questions relevant to your awkward topic given the situation and that was that. He made jokes sometimes that managed to get out a few carefree laughs out of you as well. It was all… comfortable. Nothing that you had expected. That is why, you decided, it was time to move on to watching actual movies for references, in your project.

It was nearly one in the morning, on a Wednesday night when you went to get him as your friend was out and that was the only time Jungkook was free after wrestling practice. Everyone was in bed, and it gave an eerie feeling to your journey back to your dorm.

As did his silence.

He was always talking—You realized that then. Sometimes he practically kept up a running commentary on everything and anything, yet here he was as quiet as stone. And it wasn’t because he was exerting himself. He didn’t breathe hard once the whole time. He could have been carrying a backpack full of air. But the idea of mental trouble lingered. When you tilted your head a little, you could practically hear his mind going over and over things, in a way that just wasn’t like him. He was easy-going. Happy-go-lucky. He never worried about things the way you did.

Until now.

“Jungkook, are you okay?”

“Yeah. Why wouldn’t I be?”

“I don’t know. You just seem a little…”

Like an ominous statue of yourself.

“I was just thinking what movie we should watch.”

“Oh. Oh. You mean…right now?” You asked.

“Well, that’s what you came to get me for.”

“That’s true, I did come and get you for that.”

“Unless you don’t want me in your room so late.”

“No, no why would I…no, that’s cool.”

“You’re in the Jubilee Building, right?”

You had the strongest urge to ask him how he knew. But that seemed just as weird as objecting to him being in your room.

“Yeah. You just go past the science block and then—”

“Right, right, right I got it, I got it. The statue of Heo Nanseolheon is outside it, yeah?”

“That’s the one. Then it’s the third floor. Don’t worry though, there’s an elevator.”

“Ah, it wouldn’t have been a big deal.”

“Do you wanna let me unlock the door?” you asked standing behind him when you both reached your dorm.

“Oh shit, yeah. Yeah, go ahead,” he said moving his bulky body out of the way as you slid past him to unlock the door. Everything had returned to the way it should be now between you and Jungkook.

Except for the sexy movie you were now going to watch.

Alone. Together. On your bed. In the middle of the night.

You let him pick the movie, thinking that would make things easier somehow. Nothing could be misconstrued, at least, that way. He wouldn’t think you meant anything by your choice, whatever it might be. But you forgot that he might mean something with his choice. You watched the heroine trying to clumsily pick up the hero at the start of White Palace, and cringed so hard it felt more like a cramp in your gut. Your cheeks grew hot, in a way that made you grateful for the dim light of your feeble bedside lamp.

Otherwise he would see your face go red and know you understood his point—despite the fact that his point was fucking nonsense.

“This is even less realistic than Dirty Dancing.”

“Really? You think so? Like, in what way?” You asked.

“It just seems like she keeps pushing and pushing. No woman would push a guy that good-looking if he didn’t seem into it. I can’t think of anything more embarrassing.”

You didn’t look at him, but knew he shrugged.

His arm rubbed against yours as he did it.

“Maybe she doesn’t care.”

“I guess not.”

“Maybe she knows he’s actually into it.”

“That could be one explanation.” Jungkook says, sighing.

“Plus she obviously gets exactly what she was looking for.” He adds.

Onscreen, Susan Sarandon was going down on James Spader.

Which to you didn’t seem to back up his point at all.

“Oh yeah, I’m sure she’s having a great time getting absolutely nothing out of this.”

“That’s what this looks like to you? Like she’s getting nothing out of this?”

“Well, in movies they make it look like she is. But I doubt she really would be.”

“You doubt that giving a guy a blow job could be enjoyable for a woman.”

You glanced at him then, just to see if his expression was as incredulous as his voice.

Then had to look back at the screen quickly. If anything, his expression was worse. He had one eyebrow raised, and there was almost no humour in his eyes. This was serious somehow. Much too serious.

“I don’t know. I mean it’s not really something you do for your own enjoyment. You do it for his.”

“So to you there’s nothing pleasurable about it. Nothing sexy about having a guy at your mercy. Begging you, moaning for you, trying not to push too deep when it gets too good.”

Your breath hitched.

“You do those things?”

The words came out too fast. Too disbelieving, too.

But You just couldn’t stop them. They ripped out of you before you had time to talk it over with you mind, all ragged around the edges and maybe a little breathless. Just enough that he likely heard it, and wondered why. You couldn’t tell him, however. You didn’t know yourself. You only knew that when he started talking again, you had the urge to put your fingers in your ears.

“Of course I do those things. Having your cock sucked is fucking amazing,” he said, which was absolutely fine.

But then he kept going.

He kept going.

“The heat and the slickness and her looking up at you as she works it with her hands and lips and tongue. Especially the tongue. The tongue is the best part. Watching it curl right around the—”

“Well, okay, it sounds cool when you put it that way.”

God your voice sounded loud. And too fast again, too. All your words practically jumbled together.

“I don’t know what other way it could possibly be.”

“How about hold still while I fuck your face? Some guy coming right in your eye? Losing a chunk of hair because he pulled too hard?”

“You’re not serious. Tell me honestly. None of that happened.”

Now his voice was bright with amusement. But it didn’t make you feel any better.

“All of that happened. To me. More than once.”

“Yeah but after…”

“After what?”

“After he came then he…”

He made a circle with his hand bobbing his head, as though you should know that one thing logically followed on from the other. It was all completely easy and obvious.

Instead of the hardest quiz you had ever had to get through. “Then he what? Gave me cab fare?”

“No. No. After that then this happens.”

You glanced at the thing he was pointing at.

Then had to look away again, quick. At your hands, at the bedspread.

At him, as he oh-so-slowly realized what your sudden awkwardness meant.

“This has never happened to you. Holy shit. You’ve never had a guy go down on you.”

“I have had a guy go down on me. I totally have.”

“Are you sure about that? You don’t look sure.”

“Well, maybe not like this.”

“There’s no other way to do it. This is actually the most basic, ordinary way to go about eating pussy.”

At those words, you could feel the fire burning on your cheeks and your breathing getting laboured. Jungkook really had no filter.

“Yeah, but this seems really exciting and sexy and hot.”

“Going down on a girl is really exciting and sexy and hot. Like I said about giving a guy head? Exactly the same principle. You get to see you writhe and shake and push herself against your mouth. Just like that, just like Sarandon is doing. Look at her. Look at her.”

“I am. I am looking,” You said, but You weren’t, not really.

You were thinking of the shiver that had gone through you when he said look, soft as butter and so oddly tender. And the way that he was looking himself, eyes almost far away.

Like he was seeing Sarandon, but putting someone else in her place.

“Think about how it must feel.”

“Yeah I can…I get that…”

“Think about his tongue slowly easing over her soft folds.”

“Is that…how…is that what you…” You said, breathlessly “Uh-huh.”

“And it works?”

You voice was a whisper now. But that was okay. His was, too. It was so low he had to lean close to ask you questions. He had to meet your gaze, and You had to meet his.

“What works?”

“It makes you…you know. Cum.”

“Oh yeah. But you gotta take your time.”

“I see. I guess that makes sense.” You were just babbling now, trying to keep up with him.

“Let it build, nice and slow. Start by just stroking her with your fingertips. Work her, you know, until her lips part. And then when she’s all open to you, you just trace the shape of her with your tongue. Lick and lick in these ever decreasing circles until you’re right…fucking…there.”

“Where? Where…where are you?”

You shouldn’t have asked. You knew you shouldn’t as soon as it was out. Your faces were too close together now, and his body seemed to be looming over yours. That was his shoulder, almost nudging your chin. And his thigh, pressing deep and hard into yours. His answer was never going to make any of this better.

Then it came, hotter than molten lava and twice as destructive.

“Her clit. Her slick, swollen clit.”

“I see. That makes sense,” You said, even though that wasn’t what you wanted to go with.

No, what you wanted to go with was more like oh my fucking God this can’t be reality.

“Then you just…stroke it.”

“Uh-huh.”

“Until she’s mindless.”

“Yeah. Yeah.”

“Doesn’t even know what she’s saying anymore, or doing. She might tell you to bite, to fuck her with your tongue and fingers, harder or faster or some word that doesn’t even make sense. Hips coming up to meet you, greedy for it, horny for it, so horny she barely notices that her hand is in your hair and she’s squeezing tight enough for it to sting, so close to coming that her whole body is shuddering and shivering and flushing that deep, good pink. Soon as you see it you just know she’s burning. That her clit is aching and throbbing and her pussy is all open and slippery, and one more second of this will make her come. She’s already coming, before you even know where you’re at. Hard, hard, hard, like she never has before.”

You were holding your breath by the time he was done. You practically had to—his face was so close now you could have blinked and brushed his cheek with your eyelashes. Every word he said seemed to stroke against your face, cool at first but then more heated. As though he was starting to boil alive inside, too. Certainly he looked that way. You have never seem him flushed like this, not even when he pushed himself during a match.

Not even when he was embarrassed.

Though you supposed that wasn’t a common occurrence. He didn’t seem to be embarrassed now, and he’d just said all those words. He said clit and pussy and slippery, as if that was just a normal way to talk to your friend. And he did it all without flinching, too. Without glancing away or putting some distance between you. In fact, those eyes of his—now heavy lidded and so soft focus—seemed intent on you more than they ever had been before. They skittered all over you face, searching for something you had no idea how to give.

You didn’t even know what the something was.

You only knew that it made you forget yourself, just as he had described.

It made you search his face back, marvelling over every brutish line and gentle curve. Those lips of his, as plump as a girl’s yet so masculine at the same time. Every inch of them gleaming, as if he’d slicked them with gloss in anticipation of a kiss. Though even in that moment you didn’t really believe you wanted that. Until he whispered, low and heavy against your own lips.

“You can, you know.”

“Can what?”

“Touch yourself.”

It jolted you, when he said it.

But not as much as realizing why he said it.

You followed his gaze down, and took in the unmistakable sight of your hand in your lap. Really, really high up in your lap. Almost between your legs, in fact—though that was fine, it was cool, it was okay. You stuttered ‘no, no I didn’t really want to do that’, but it didn’t matter.

Because his hand was actually between his legs.

“I do,” he said.

As the whole world as You knew it dissolved right in front of your eyes.

“You do?”

“Fuck, yes. I’m dying to.”

“Because of the film. Because of the movie.”

“Sure. We can say that, if you want.”

You closed your eyes. Swallowed thickly.

Wished hard that he hadn’t added that last part.

“If we could that would be awesome.”

“No problem. I mean it was probably inevitable that this would happen to us.”

“Probably, yeah. Almost definitely, in fact.”

“Just a natural response to a sexy movie.”

“Seems that way to me.”

“So you just slip your hand under your waistband, and I’ll slip my hand under mine,” he said, which was fine all on its own. The problem was that he then went ahead and did it. You tried not to look, but saw anyway. You saw the way he fumbled in his haste, as though all his talk was only calm on the surface. Underneath, something was paddling frantically. It was making his cheeks pink and his body all trembly.

And his dick hard. God, his cock was hard.

You could see that without even trying at all. The curving shape beneath his sweatpants was enormous and unmistakable, and even if it hadn’t been, his hand made it pretty clear. As You watched, he eased it over that solid length, before finally clasping it in a way that shoved the swollen head right up against the tented material. Now You could make out ruder details, like the thick ridge around the head, and the slit at the tip. Both pronounced, explicit, rude.

But that wasn’t what really got you.

It was the way he stopped to lick his palm, before shoving it

under his waistband.

“Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god, are you serious?”

“It’s cool. it’s fine. We don’t even have to look at each other.”

“No I guess not. I guess…I guess that I can just watch the screen.”

“We’re just two people getting off over a hot movie.”

“Exactly. Exactly.”

But that wasn’t strictly true. You weren’t getting off over the movie at all. Nothing was even happening anymore—it was just rich people looking down their noses and arguments over a Dust buster. If anything, it was vaguely depressing, rather than lust-inducing. Yet still You sat there, face burning, body tender and rigid all at the same time. Half of you stuffed so full of embarrassment and shock you sort of wanted to block everything out, the other half just shamelessly straining to hear every single tiny sound he made. Never daring to look, of course, but then…

You really didn’t need to.

He made so much noise that you could make out almost everything. Every little moan and gasp—and there were a lot of them, too. Lots of thick, guttural moans that started on an ah and ended with a kind of abrupt sigh, as though a knife had sliced through his throat before he could finish. So many soft mmms and gasps, like he honestly couldn’t get enough of whatever he was doing.

Though it was the whispers that hit you hardest. They got you right in the gut, low down and deep enough to ache. Oh yeah, he murmured, as though the hottest sex in the world was happening onscreen. As though they were fucking like animals, up and down and left and right. His tone even sounded sort of tremulous, and it got more intense as time went on. Soon he was panting, and rocking, and every now and then uttering something he was clearly imagining himself doing.

“Ah, yeah, suck my cock, just like that,” he said.

Then just to make it extra agonizing, he spat into his hand.

To make it extra slick, you thought, like someone’s mouth. Someone sucking him the way he’d described, slow and steady until he was actually shuddering, right here and now. The bed was moving, at least, and it wasn’t because he was working that cock hard. He wasn’t. He was going slow, so slow, squeezing and rolling rather than the short, fast kind of thing You’d always thought guys did. They almost never seemed to do anything else in porn…but then again they never did all this other stuff, too. You dared to turn you head a little more and saw to your astonishment that he had his hand pressed to his mouth. He was almost biting his fist, chest heaving, body shivering all over—but most important, eyes closed.

He couldn’t even see you looking. You were free to do as you pleased.Yet something held you back. You couldn’t seem to do more than peek out of the corner of you eye, and even that made you feel strange. You kept getting this clenching sensation—sort of like embarrassment or humiliation—and it got worse when his back arched. When he actually said out loud that he was almost there, that he was so close, that he was gonna come all over your duvet. I need something to do it on, he said, and even that had a shameful frisson of its own. You had a brief flash of him kneeling up and suddenly coming all over your face, or maybe pulling down that ridiculously large neck hole to expose your breasts.

Followed by an image of that thick white liquid coating you, striping you face, dripping off your tight little nipples. Him pushing his cock past your lips to finish off, groaning as he flooded your mouth.

And he would have flooded it, too. You glanced at him just in time to see him shove his sweatpants down, that big dick swelling under the pressure of his too-tight grip. Thick ribbons of come already hitting his bared belly, over and over until you were sure he must be done. He had to be, yet more kept flowing over his still-working fist. You watched it run down over his fingers in slippery trails before pooling in his lap.

Though none of it was what you kept seeing behind your eyes in the aftermath. Instead, you saw the way his face had looked as he shot his load. The open mouth, and the closed eyes, and most of all the strange, wrenching vulnerability that had covered him for a moment. No mischief, no macho bullshit—just a completely open and abandoned sort of ecstasy.

And all of it for you.

He knew you had watched him. He still knew now. You flicked your eyes back to the screen as he started to catch his breath, but the first thing he did was include you.

“Guess I kind of made a mess here,” he said, everything about his tone suggesting two conspirators, finishing off their evil deed. You even got up after he’d said it, to get him a tissue.

Though when You got back he’d pretty much taken care of most of it.

You stopped in the doorway to the bathroom at the sight: Him, casually licking his messy fingers.

It took you a good two minutes after that to go over to him, with your fistful of toilet paper. And when you did go, it was on very shaky legs. Your whole body felt shaky, in fact—though not in any way you’d experienced before. This was like being full to the brim with something burning hot, skin so close to ripping that it couldn’t keep still. Sometimes you thought you could see it shivering slightly under the strain, and every inch of it was tender, so tender. His leg brushed yours as you sat down, and it was agony. You even winced—then immediately regretted it.

He had been concentrating on clean-up. Now he looked up at you sharply.

And asked questions You were loathing to answer.

“Have you…not? I mean have you not—”

“I couldn’t. I’m sorry, I couldn’t.”

“God, you must be bursting.”

“Honestly, I’m fine.”

The problem was though; you didn’t seem fine.

You couldn’t meet his gaze. Your hands were fists on your thighs.

And of course he could see all of that.

“You look like you’re bursting.”

“Oh yeah? And what does bursting look like?”

“Your voice is shaking.”

“Is it?” You asked, voice so light it almost passed.

Almost, almost, almost.

“Your cheeks are flushed.”

“Are they?”

“And then there’s the fact that your nipples are like diamonds. Fuck, look how stiff they are. Isn’t that agonizing, having them like that? I bet your clit’s the same. Bet your pussy is so wet. So wet you’re making a mess of the nice, clean clothes.”

Your cheeks grew hotter and hotter as he whispered each word. By the time he was done they felt like they were going to melt right off you face. That tense, cringing feeling in your stomach was ten times worse, and that was before he got to the last point. The one about the clothes, and the mess, and oh god what if he was right? It felt as if he might be. You weren’t wearing any underwear, and everything was really slippery between your legs. You could feel it, every time You moved.

“Oh fuck, sorry, sorry I don’t…I hope…it’s just that—” You didn’t even know why you were apologizing

“Honey, you don’t need an explanation.”

His tone was like sinking into a warm bath—and the thumb you could feel stroking over you forearm only pulled you deeper down. He just did it so idly. So like he wasn’t touching you at all.

Before you knew it, you were up to your ears in liquid heat.

“Are you sure? Because it kind of feels like I do.”

“I’m sure. I mean, the movie was pretty intense.”

“Right, exactly. Super intense.”

“So why deny yourself?”

“I’m not…denying…anything.”

“I could leave, if you want.”

“No, god no,” You said, too fast and too fierce.v

Though it was only afterward that you realized how it sounded: Not like someone trying to say you didn’t want to masturbate. Like someone saying that you wanted him to stay.

And he took it that way, too.

“Or, you know. I could just…do it for you,” he said.

Then you just had to do your best not to go out of your mind.

You stopped herself from jumping up. Kept your hands from flailing.

Didn’t look at him, in case looking made you do something crazy.

“Oh my god. You can’t be serious. You can’t be serious.”

“Probably wouldn’t take a lot.”

“I always take a lot.”

“Even when you’re alone?”

“Especially when I’m alone.”

“Well, maybe we should see about that.”

Again, you had the urge to get up. Maybe you even would have, if it hadn’t been for the other things he was doing. The thumb stroking your arm was now the back of his hand, running the length of your arm over and over. And that was his breath against the curve of your throat, so close and warm he could have been kissing you there. It felt like kissing.

Only without the scariness of the real thing.

All of this was without the scariness of the real thing. It was just a game, that was all—and one that you could win if you really put you mind to it. He thought he could get you so easily, but he was utterly and completely wrong. You were a rock, in the face of whatever he was going to do. You were impervious to the pleasure he seemed to think he was going to dole out, to the point where you almost laughed when he slipped his hand beneath the waistband of those too-big sweatpants.

It was weird. Slightly uncomfortable.

Not sexy in the least.

And then his fingertips just oh-so-lightly grazed the pouting lips of your swollen pussy, and things pretty much started to go downhill from there. The sensation it sent through you was just so intense, and over something so small. He hadn’t even slipped between them to your clit, or eased a finger into your slick little hole. In truth, you weren’t entirely sure he’d touched you at all.

Yet you still had to clench your jaw.

You had to tell herself that it was just the stuff that had happened before—the film and him coming and then licking his fingers like a satisfied cat. It wasn’t anything to do with this right now, with him touching you, with his skill. He wasn’t skilful at all. He was terrible. Awful.

he worst lover you had ever had.

You had no idea why your thighs were trembling. Or what made you moan when he finally, finally, finally eased his fingers into that slick slit, and then topped it off by telling you just what he found there.

“Ohhhh fuuuuck you are wet. You’re so wet. Jesus Christ, Y/N, how can you stand it? How can you sit still and quiet with those eyes closed when your pussy is like this? So slippery I can just glide all the way down and ease on in and oh man, oh man,” he said, and all You could do in response was shiver and make a number of embarrassing noises. First for his words, and then oh god then for the feel of him doing it.

He used two fingers—two of those long, thick fingers—yet somehow it didn’t hurt when he pushed into you. There was no fumbling or searching. Your body just seemed to open for him, as though they’d dated for years and he’d worked on you for hours. He knew exactly how to touch you there, and when he did you simply had to respond. Your gasp rung out in the small room.Though you vowed it would be the last one. That was it now—you weren’t going to give him the satisfaction of anything else. Not even when he started working his fingers in and out, slow and steady and so unbelievably good. you kind of wanted to cry over the unfairness of it. Why was he the one who had to be so good at this? How did he know how to do it in this deliberate, teasing, tantalizing way?

Even watching him do it was exciting. You made the mistake of glancing down and all you could see was his hand rolling beneath the material, the waistband occasionally stretching to give you a glimpse of your glossy cunt, his gleaming fingers, the way you were spread around that thick intrusion…

Fuck.

You had to look at the screen just to stop yourself coming right then and there—though even those measures had an exciting quality of their own. James Spader was just doing something incredibly dull now, while you sat here watching through slitted eyelids, cheeks flushed and legs spread, as a man slowly fingered your slick, flushed pussy. Back and forth, back and forth, until you were so beside yourself you weren’t sure you even wanted to hold back your moans. You only knew that you were still trying, for reasons that seemed vague and far away now. It just doesn’t matter, your mind hissed, but you kept it up anyway. You held yourself more tightly and bit deep into your lip—deep enough that you tasted blood. And when he started to ease those fingers up, you shut your eyes tight. You thought of other things, more boring things: dry books and bird-watching. All to no avail. He made one circle around your clit.

Just one tiny, insignificant circle, and that was it. Your orgasm rolled up from that stiff little bud, in one all-consuming and all-powerful wave. It took away your control over your body—your toes curled tight and your back arched. But most important, it took away your control over your mouth. It let one little word slip out.

Though one little word was more than enough.

“Jungkook,” You said, and after that the game was pretty much up. That was gratitude in your voice and pleasure in the sigh behind it, and all wrapped in the neat little bow of his name. There was no more pretending that it wasn’t him who had made you feel this way, or suggesting that all of this was just a game.And he knew it immediately. He kept up the thrusts of his long, thick fingers, helping you prolong the feeling of your orgasm for as long as possible. And he didn’t stop there. Your face was starting to contort from the oversensitivity and it was obvious that Jungkook knew it too from the way he bit his lip and started to purposely move his fingers faster once again.

“Ahh! J-Jungkook… I can’t….” You moaned out, though this seemed to have no effect on him as he seemed determined to elicit another orgasm from you. His fingers scraping against your tightening walls as they fought to repeatedly slam back inside you. Your thighs were shaking, your eyes half lidded, leaning back on your hands as his worked between your legs. Suddenly you gripped Jungkook’s moving hand as you came dangerously close to letting go.

“That’s it, fuck, cum again for me Y/N. I need this. You need this” He almost sounded desperate and it made you want to sob because everything was so fucking hot.

With a cry of his name, you came undone again, your body almost curling in towards itself from the sensitivity.

“Holy shit, holy shit,” he said, as though you’d cried out the filthiest thing on the face of the earth. And, again, he didn’t stop there. You could hear him fumbling with the waistband of his sweatpants already—though you tried to turn it into something else in your head. He was just pulling them up, you thought. They had slid down as he serviced you, that was all.

Only it wasn’t all.

When you made the mistake of glancing his way, you saw so much more than you were ready for. It was supposed to be over now, completely over, but he’d shoved everything down to mid-thigh and his cock was in his hand again and god god god why was it so arousing? You’d had cum twice already. He’d had one orgasm already, and now he was being so fucking filthy.

Yet somehow the filthiness only made it worse.

You came searingly close to telling him yes.

And go on.

And come all over me—just like you’d imagined.

For one wild second, it even seemed like he might. He was groaning and panting and he kept saying things, incredible things like “do you see what you do to me do you get how fucking horny you make me oh fuck just hearing you moan my name”. His hand was heavy on your shoulder, and you knew he was close. He was going to yank your top down any second now.

Any second, you thought.

Though you didn’t realize how much you wanted it until the first thick burst slid over his fist.

Didn’t know how little control you had over herself until he grunted your name and shuddered violently, that slick fluid easing over his still-pumping fist. After all, if you’d had any you would have stayed right where you were, content to just watch.Instead of leaning forward to take that heavy, swollen, slippery head in your mouth, to catch the last ribbons of his salt-sweet cum all over your eager tongue.

“Fucking fuck, Jagiya” Jungkook cursed loudly, watching you take the head of his cock in your mouth. He slid his hands in your hair, gripping it from the bottom of your skull gently, rocking your face back and forth, riding out the last of his high. You looked up at him, eye still glassed over, breathing hard and laboured and slid the head of him out of your mouth.

There was no doubt that Jungkook was shocked at your boldness but he seemed pleasantly surprised. His pupils blown out, lips swollen, skin gleaming. He truly was a work of art. The magnitude of what you two had done hit you hard. So, naturally, there was only one thing left to do in panic.

Kick him out.

“Jungkook…you need to leave”

A/N: So, Idk what happened but yeah hope you all enjoy. Not sure if I’ll make this a series since I’m bad at continuing ideas. I may stick to separate scenarios. I get bored easily. However, please feel free to check out my blog and send me ideas for new fics

Why Ochako is Actually a Complex Character

I was going to save this post until after finals were over for me BUT THEN I REMEMBERED IT IS MY DARLING PRINCESS’S BIRTHDAY TODAY AND WHAT BETTER WAY TO CELEBRATE HER BIRTHDAY THAN TO MAKE A POST THAT CELEBRATES HER.

 So leggo.

 Now I won’t go into overall details about her because I already did that in this post that you can read right here, which I essentially discussed how she’s actually an amazing WSJ heroine and whoever voted her the worst should put their heads in sand because they don’t deserve to see the rest of the world (I kid I kid, promise!).

 Rather, I wanted to challenge the viewpoints people have of her and really argue on the fact that Ochako Uraraka is actually more of a complex character than we give her credit for. Most often than not, the fandom looks towards Katsuki or Izuku or even Todoroki and they build them up and go on and on about their complexity in the series. Hell, those three are my friend’s favorite characters and they are fan favorites for a multitude of reasons that they deserve. I myself have made numerous posts about Katsuki since we are given such complex views of him as well as the others in the series. They are the main focus in the story and their growth has been some of the best we’ve ever seen in a series.

 However, characters iike Ochako, who actually does have a lot of complexity and dimensionality, get lost in their wake and I really want to talk about that.

 Most often than not, when we see Ochako, we see this bubbly smiling girl who has such a wonderful and positive attitude that sometimes comes off ditzy. One glance at her and the words that come to mind are cute, adorable, fluffy, etc because that is the type of character that she mostly is. She is the female support of Izuku and the way she contributes to the story is with her adorable attitude that lightens up the mood in certain situations like the Ground Zero fight and even the room competition (did you see how cute she was with Iida’s glasses!?).

 Yet, what bothers me and possibly other really hardcore fans of her is that she isn’t just this bubbly character that smiles on the side but she does have complex issues that really makes her character more interesting in comparison to other characters.

 I mean for starters, this girl is the QUEEN of keeping her emotions from people and really suppressing them in most situations and not letting them get in the way of what she wants to get done.

 For example, the first real example of this is when she lost to her fight with Katsuki.

Now let’s remember situational factors going into this: we just found out her true goals into going to heroics (which was said in a much more serious tone than we had ever seen from her before)

we found out she was incredibly nervous to be facing Katsuki (and again WAS SUPPRESSING HER EMOTIONS)

we saw her rejecting Izuku’s help (as well as her little speech about feeling ashamed)


we saw her PUTTING HER ALL INTO THAT FIGHT TO SHOW HER TRUE STRENGTH

 So seeing her crying when she’s speaking to her family isn’t just some small defeated thing but it really gives us so much insight in her character and who she is as a person. We finally see how truly hard she is on herself and the perfectionist personality that she usually keeps hidden from others. You can even see by her facial expression when Izuku left that she put on a face for him to not let him get more worried then he already was. 

 And then don’t even get me started with her attitude during the Hero License Exam because oh my gosh, that was so powerful from her.

 From that, we first see her being so strategic af:

Then we get this amazing speech from Izuku about her and how he could have told the difference between her and Kemi (notice the plan part!)

Of course her being a BA here cuz eh why not, she’s really grown from her training

THEN LET’S SKIP TO HER PUSHING HER FEELINGS DOWN FOR IZUKU


I just

There are so many moments of Ochako that I missed that would have proved my point even further than this but these moments here showcase how complex and really interesting Ochako is as a character.

 The bubbly personality that we see from her is only a piece of the whole picture and you could even argue that she’s so good at suppressing her emotions that it’s the personality she chooses to portray to others to keep her other emotions away from people because she doesn’t want to burden others. I personally don’t know if that’s true at all and maybe it is, maybe it isn’t but the fact is that she isn’t just some character that sits on the side and looks cute and adorable. There are so elements about her that makes her different and the fight she had with Katsuki really changed her as well as her inspiration from Izuku. She took both of those interactions with those characters and used them to better herself and it’s just SO POWERFUL. Not many shounen female heroines do that so it’s so refreshing to have Ochako be the way she is.

 Overall, as obvious as it must be, Ochako is one of my favorite characters and I’m so excited to see the growth she’s going to have more in the series. Her feelings for Izuku got cut off during the exam so that’s an arc we need to get from her and I know I want to see Ochako kicking Katsuki’s ass and actually winning to show how much she’s grown from the beginning. I have so much hope that Horikoshi has so many plans for her character and I’m so excited to see what he has in store for her and how he will continue to build upon her.

 Regardless, Happy Birthday Ochako!

 TLDR: Ochako is a very complex character and I wish more people celebrated that.

Just in case you ever worry you’re not Adult™ enough and don’t have enough self control for when it comes to creative projects, (cause I get asked a lot “how do you get yourself to focus” and similar questions) I have a literal separate profile on my computer that has nothing on it but Word and my project folders. No browsers, no apps, not even god damn solitaire because if I have a single thing to do other than write, I won’t do shit.

So if you’re one of those people who struggles to focus and you keep beating yourself up over not having the willpower to just make yourself focus: stop. You’re not failing, you just haven’t found the method that works for you yet.

Keep going, you’ll get there.

Lesser seen french tips

These are a few things that i think might be relevant to language learners that i don’t think I’ve seen on langblr! At the end of the day it’s whatever works for you, but i hope these might be helpful 💙

🗼pouvoir, vouloir and aller (to be able, to want and to go) are really useful verbs to learn confidently. If you want to use a verb you don’t know how to conjugate, you can often follow one of these verbs conjugated with the infinitive to express something similar. It’s always better that than guessing a conjugation!

🗼watch videos of french people speaking english! Most french people will still impose a little bit of french pronunciation even while speaking really good english, and this highlights french pronunciation that you wouldn’t notice in a person speaking fluent french. 

🗼for me, reading simple YA novels written originally in french is actually more beneficial than translated english books that I’m familiar with. This will prevent you from reading by assumption/context/memory. Also, french books tend to be more culturally relevant, and include phrasing and idioms that are more typically french.

🗼contradiction of my last point, but try watching shows originally in your native language with french audio and subtitles. For some reason, it’s far easier for me to understand and i know many people struggle with listening to french. Netflix often has the option of picking the  language of your show, i would highly recommend this if you struggle to understand french films/shows. 

🗼quizlet is the most effective method of learning vocab I’ve found! For me, writing out flashcards takes a long time, and typing in the answers solidifies spelling better than just repeating the words. 

🗼if you’re someone who struggles with pronunciation, some people find it helpful to have someone who doesn’t speak the language read aloud in it, as it highlights typical errors that a speaker of your language will make (and will probably make you feel good about yourself lbh) 

🗼practise just speaking aimlessly in the language, be it to yourself, your pet, or even just while thinking. It’ll help you practise coming up with things to say on the spot, and when you screech to a halt because you don’t know how to express something, you’ll know what vocab it’ll be useful for you to learn next. 

May the heavens bless Luffy for coming up with the perfect words to relieve Sanji of his terrible burden.

If you think about it, up to this point this arc was everything about Sanji not being allowed to be his true self - he was ridiculed and abused by his own family for being kind, for being vulnerable, for being human. Part of the reason why he was still in so much agony even when he was free to leave was because his kind and vulnerable inner self was demanding him to save even his cruelest abusers. 

But Luffy gives him the affirmation to be who he is, as if it’s the most natural thing in the world. He’s basically telling Sanji that he didn’t expect any less of him, that such kindness is why he wants him back and why he chose him as his cook in the first place. To Luffy, no more explanation or apology is needed in Sanji being Sanji, regardless of what kind of danger that may bring forth. If that is not the greatest salvation for Sanji’s poor soul in this arc, I don’t know what is. 

  • Reaper, letting Tracer into their house: Hana! This whore basket just showed up for you.
  • Soldier 76: Honey butter, that’s no way to treat a guest. Now show that bitch to Hana’s room.
  • Tracer: I just need you to get your Mom or your Dad to sign this waver so you can continue to be a part of Overwatch.
  • D.Va: Um, what?
  • Tracer: We need your Mom or your Dad to sign this.
  • D.Va: Ah, there’s that word again.
  • Tracer: Maybe I’ll just go ask your Mom or your Dad directly.
  • D.Va: My Dad and my what?
  • Tracer: What?
  • D.Va: You keep saying my Dad and something else.
  • Tracer: You mean Mom? Oh my goodness, I didn’t even realize. Those two men down there, they’re both your parents.
  • D.Va: No, they just stay in my house and eat my food. Of course they’re my parents!
  • Tracer: I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have assumed. Hana, if you don’t mind me asking, do you know who your Mom is?
  • D.Va: I can make up words too.
  • Tracer: Hana, where do babies come from?
  • D.Va: When a man and another man love each other very much, they
  • Tracer: Okay never mind, it all makes sense.
  • submitted by xm0c

My Name Is Love


you thought love was a verb,
it is.
but it is also a noun.
i digress…
my name is love.

if you are lucky
enough you have
met me.
i come in many
forms.
i am genderless.
i am brave.

do not search
for me.
i will come to you.
i promise
i am pure
do not be mislead

i do not cause pain.
that is a side affect of
those who abuse me.
if you haven’t met me yet.
i am coming for you
in due time.

please don’t give up on me.
i will look for you when
you least expect it.
i promise, you will cry

and no, not the heart shattering
tears that leave you empty.
no, no, no my dear
tears of pure happiness
you won’t even realise
you are crying
i will fill your soul.
remember me,
my name is love.

—  intrinsical

consider yuri being incredibly obnoxious bc of his crush on otabek

for the first few months of him realizing he’s in love he literally will not shut up about him. all attempts of conversation immediately go to otabek

“yurio hows your quad loop” “beka can do a quad loop perfectly katsudon did you know that” “yes yura i know”

his twitter is filled with vague tweets that leave all of the yuri’s angels dying

his password on his phone is ‘beka’ in numbers (”2352″)

if mila hears the word “beka” come out of yuri’s mouth she just sighs and clears up her schedule for the next two hours bc god knows yuri will not let her go until she knows all about what otabek did last week

eventually everyone realizes who exactly yuri likes from his vague tweets and the next time theyre in competition and beka says “davai!” to yuri the crowd LOSES THEIR SHIT

and yuri is incredibly embarrassed

but he doesnt stop

(especially when he founds out otabek likes him too, and that his PDA is even worse than yuri’s)

Team 7 Deserved The Ending Episode dedicated for them!

Naruto Manga : Chapter 1 Cover 

Introducing Naruto Uzumaki, the hero, with TEAM 7, which will make their first introduction in Chapter 3 and become the heart of the series. 

Naruto Manga: Chapter 699

Team 7 Back Together!

Naruto Manga: Chapter 700

Everyone gets equal amount of screen time. It also showed the readers how Naruto has become the 7th Hokage, something which has been his dream and goal since Chapter 1

Naruto Gaiden : Kishimoto’s last original work

Team 7 reunited as adults and still being the most baddass Shinobis and NEO Sannin! The manga ended with Uchiha Family photos, which shows the main rival and the heroine: Sasuke and Sakura, with their daughter Sarada, which inherited Naruto’s dream of becoming the future Hokage!

Kishimoto Masashi showed us over and over again in his manga, through his drawing, how important TEAM 7 is for Naruto story. They are not just main supporting roles which can be replaced by just anyone, that’s why Kishi always ended up getting back to them and tell their story, be it individually, or together as a Team. 

So, how come the Anime ended with a Wedding episode which isn’t even centered around its main characters? Sasuke appeared for like how many seconds? And Sakura only get to say one word? It didn’t even tell a story about Naruto who finally reached his dream to become Hokage.

You don’t need to be Antis of certain characters to be pissed off because of this.

ok but side note can we not use words like “threw herself on him” or god forbid slut for dot like ??? she got a little boozed up and got carried away; magnus stopped her and she respected that. you all rly do the most when it comes to woc lmao.

Matt's Glasses

Matt’s glasses always bother me, starting with the fact that Pidge is wearing them. She obviously doesn’t need glasses, as seen in flashbacks

And the fact she doesn’t wear them with her helmet

And I want to say she just popped the frames out, I really do, but

they obviously do have frames. 

Aside from Pidge wearing the glasses, there’s the fact that Matt is not. He obviously needs them, right???

But he’s not wearing them with his helmet, yet his dad is. He always wore them in flashbacks, even the photo that seems to be taken just before he left

Yet looks like he can see perfectly fine without them

Conclusion: Matt Holt is a faker who only wears glasses for the aesthetic 

begin again (m)

Summary: As a new professor at Hogwarts, you knew separating your present and your past within the walls was an important distinction to maintain your respectability. But finding out that your coworker was your schoolgirl crush for five years hadn’t been part of the plan.
Pairing: Hoseok | Reader
Genre: Fluff/Smut; Harry Potter AU
Word Count: 13,788
Author’s Note: Took advantage of some Hoseok feelings I’ve been suffering from as of late and decided to pair it with my Harry Potter AUs!!!! Once again, tagging @chokemejimin who has asked to tagged in my HP works!! Hope you like it! 

.

There’s a saying that goes around that often relates to the idea that people, places, or things that were once daunting and terrifying gradually start to become less intimidating with the help of time, growth, maturity—all those things you never believed would happen to you. After all, who wants to welcome the idea of growing old with opened arms?

You remember being seventeen and witnessing what you had believed would be the last sight you would ever get of Hogwarts, the comforting walls that housed seven years of your childhood, seven years worth of secrets, friendships, youth, innocence, and a desperation to chase after something you didn’t quite know about yet. Being as young and naive and indecisive as you were, it would have been difficult to comprehend the idea of returning, if returning to Hogwarts was something you even thought to consider in the first place. It never was.

It’s funny how much you had a tendency to return back to the place that reminded you most of home. Despite the history behind its walls, the war across the campus, Hogwarts remains consistent and peaceful and traditional. Unlike your very first day at eleven years old, you brush in through the doors of Hogwarts with a grace of familiarity. No longer do the tall walls that seem to stretch out to the ceiling terrify you and no longer do the endless corridors frighten you. You’re no longer a student who perhaps did not know any better. You’ve returned as a professor, just a little bit older and just a little bit wiser.

The baggage handle curled around your fingertips feel as if they’re growing heavier and heavier the longer you find yourself making your way through the outside courtyard of the school, towards the castle, trying to make your way to the new quarters you had been gifted with as a new educator of the institute. In spite of the struggle, it’s hard to keep the bounce out of your step, the smile across your features, because although returning back to the rooms of your past is not something you would have elected to spend your career under, it’s a new whole sensation approaching Hogwarts and knowing that you would get to do something and invest your time in something you were always particularly passionate about.

You’re just reaching the front steps of the school, before a voice calls out to you, striking a chord of familiarity in your heart as you let the tone sink into your mind and rummage through the archives of your brain. “Hey, you need some help with that?”

Keep reading

My dear lgbt+ kids, 

There’s always going to be someone who has “had it worse” than you. 

My mom’s first reaction to my coming-out was, i’d say, pretty pretty bad. Her words hurt me. I felt unloved, lonely, dirty, like something was wrong with me, like i ruined her life just by being myself. 

And yet i feel almost guilty when i say “Her reaction was pretty bad”. There are kids who get beaten up or kicked out of their home or even get murdered after a coming-out - My mom just said a few mean things. Who am i to complain? Shouldn’t I feel thankful that it wasn’t worse? Other lgbt+ kids have had it worse. 

Now that i’m older and spent more time with other lgbt+ people, i realized some important things and I want to share them with you: 

1. I’m not the only one who feels that way. Many of us do. So, if you relate to my words, please know: You’re not alone. 

2.  There’s always going to be someone who has “had it worse” than you.If you got insulted, there’s someone who got insulted worse. If you got bullied by five people, there’s someone who got bullied by ten. And so on. That doesn’t mean that you are not allowed to hurt. Someone else’s pain doesn’t diminish your own. 

3. Your pain is not what makes you lgbt+. Your identity is. How valid your identity is not determined by how much pain others make you go through. 

4. We don’t have to feel thankful for not getting murdered or kicked out. We don’t have to feel thankful for “only getting a bit insulted”. That feeling is based on the horrifying idea that it is normal to get abused after a coming-out. It’s not. 

If someone makes you feel bad for being lgbt+, you are allowed to feel pain - even when others “have had it worse”.  

With all my love, 

Your Tumblr Mom