which is unlikely to ever happen come to think of it

Sorry for slightly long post, will not post more long-stuff.

There’s a certain underlying stress that comes from being a media student. A student who spends their days and nights just staring at the media, at Twitter, at Tumblr. Watching the news. Listening to the radio. A stress from already having anxiety about the world as I do. Depression as I do. 

In order to get good grades I have to read about people’s suffering - which is kind of dark to think about.

There was a certain light and stress reliever from discovering Writeblr. I looked through thousands of accounts before I made one myself and It rekindled the love for writing that never truly went away. There’s this stress relief that I could write a book and send little segments to friends on here, which would cause me manageable anxiety, unlike unmanageable anxiety if I were to do so in real life to real-life friends.

I came to Writeblr with the hope it was different from the rest of Tumblr, asking myself…

How could writing possibly be anymore depressing than the world I have to remind myself exists around me. 

Ha-Ha. 

I wanted to escape the fuckery of life and being a media student, only to fall into the worst community for debating in the entirety of the world - fucking Question Time is better than Writeblr. If I wanted bloody screaming at each other and debating I would have rejoined debate club.

I wanted fluffy flowers and inspiration.

I have never felt less inspired and more depressed as I have being in this community, but I stay for my friends and I stay for the hope it’ll become some-what functioning to be in. 

I’m hoping if I really distance myself from that stuff that I might be able to pull myself out of these bad depressive bursts I’ve been having and write again. Not become blind to the world or unaware, but just breathe from it for a second.

So: Ignoring you if you’re over-the-top posting or screaming at each other.

And: Posting less spamming-posts and more inspirational flowers. (I will stay away from the internet when I am tired and or on meds as I annoy people.)

Maybe it is mostly just Tumblr that is the worst place for debating, but I am trying to deflect it and the same things on Writeblr. I am just going to talk to people and look for friend’s rather than look at posts on Tumblr, they make me sad.

<3 

2

Killian Jones, park ranger for the Greater Yellowstone Ecosystem, meet Emma Swan, avid solo hiking enthusiast, and generally the most irritating human being he’s ever had the misfortune of happening upon.  Multiple times.  One would think that, at 34,375 square miles, it would be unlikely that they would meet outside of his park office at the beginning of the season, when she and her stuttering old yellow bug roll through the entrance.  Nevertheless, every year, for the past four years, he’s crossed her path – in the woods, on the mountains, in the grasses of the steppe – at least once every year.  Much to his dismay, his trusty dog, Arthur, takes a shine to her every time, and Killian finds himself grumbling along behind her as she takes the paths at too quick a pace, too far from home, too late at night.  On one particular evening, a pop up storm strands the both of them in the northeastern sector, after which they must find a new route home.  Together.

“Pardon, love, but I’ll thank you not to steal my dog from me.”

“It’s not my fault he likes me more than you.”

Killian huffs. Emma Swan is certainly a pain in his arse. Although, he must admit, here in the steppe, where the sun plucks strands of gold out of the grass, and where the darkness and silence rest easily between them, she is nothing if not beautiful, the selfsame gold sparking in the strands of her hair.  He very nearly forgets he’s supposed to be insulting her, when she leaps into a brook, the cool, crystalline water splashing all over him.  She laughs, brightly, when Arthur quickly follows.

Quietly, he says, “You’re determined to have me fall in love with you, aren’t you, Swan?”

“What’s that?”

“You’ll be the death of me.”

In which @imhookedonaswan​ and I came up with this idea this morning after freaking out over this photograph.  We intend to co-write the fic, but for now, have this set!