which is probably 5 too many

anonymous asked:

oh my goooooooosh can you pls make a top 5 locations sidney crosby can kick my ass because i feel that shit on a personal level everyday and your geno one was just too good like i needmorebitch

top 5 locations for sidney crosby to beat my ass

5. on his little dock - cole harbour, nova scotia. reason: probably has several fishing poles with which to beat me, could easily push me off the dock and into the water, no witnesses.

4. live on TSN sportscentre - toronto, ontario. reason: can be broadcast to his many adoring fans in canada, also he would probably be able to get an “accidental” punch or two on don cherry, which is always a plus.

3. on gary bettman’s front lawn - saddle river, new jersey. reason: it sends a great message to bettman that sid will kick anyone’s ass. also proximity to bettman will surely put sid’s anger levels through the roof, ensuring a good ass-whooping.

2. the parking lot of any tim horton’s in canada. reason: sid’s powers are at their highest when he is in within 100 ft of a timmy’s. also nathan mackinnon would probably pop up at some point to help him.

1. at center ice in the middle of the Sidney Crosby Hockey School - cole harbour, nova scotia. reason: home ice advantage, lots of friends to help him, a bunch of small hockey kids cheering him on.

Haven Craft’s Tips for Beginner Witches, Part One

Tips for Beginner Witches

Let’s start with this – I am not the witch Pope. I cannot speak for the witchcraft community as a whole; only for my own tradition.

5 Things I Believe Beginner Witches Should Ask Themselves

Note that the answers to these things will change, but that a firm grasp of the answers at any point in your practice may be helpful to you. I recommend actually writing your answers down, and every now and again check back and see if your stance has shifted.

1. Is magick real?

If yes, then what do you mean when you say, “Magick is real”. (Do you mean that you can effect reality with your will, intent, and energy? Do you mean like, Harry Potter real? What will disappoint you to realize might not be probable? What will inspire you to realize you can accomplish?)

2. Where are your lines? (What do you firmly believe is true/false, right/wrong? Violence, doing harm, controlling others, etc. Would you punch someone if they threatened a friend? Would you curse someone if they threatened a friend? What would you do, if your coven head told you it was right but you felt it was wrong?)

3. What are you looking for in a magickal path? (Pro Tip – no one has all the answers and there is no one right way.)

4. What are you prepared to do in order to accomplish your goals? (How many spoons do you have to give this practice? Can you devote one night a week, are you going to randomly pick stuff up on Tumblr, are you going to leave society to pursue your studies under a waterfall, etc.)


I recommend that no one make any oaths or vows in their first year of practice. Get to know yourself, how you feel about magick, and what you actually want to do before you do any big commitments. (Historic anecdote – this is what the original year and a day was for.) More strident, but still personal, recommendation: if someone tries to get you to oath to them within your first week of being a witch, run.


Things People Should Tell Beginner Witches, But Often Don’t

1. Don’t be afraid to change your mind.

2. Don’t throw good energy after bad by continuing to do something that isn’t right for you.

3. Don’t be afraid to continue your education, even if that means learning something that was right for you before is no longer right for you.

4. There is no one right way to do this. There is no Witch Pope - there is no dogmatic enforcement of the path to being a witch.

5. There are absolutely as many assholes in Paganism and witchcraft as there are anywhere else. Don’t think that these people are all spiritually enlightened beings who mean you well and who will give good advice.

6. Yahoo Answers is not your friend. You have the internet – which has access to both all of human information and all of human misinformation. Look for credible sources. Anything that seems too easy or too good to be true probably is. Work on critical thinking.

7. Try Scholar.Google.Com over “this article says so on Patheos.com.” Seriously, recently an article on there claimed Friday the 13th was a sacred holiday in goddess centered pre-Christian Paganism before the patriarchy ruined it. There is no historical validation for that, but a bunch of witches reblogged it. (Things you learn from scholarly sources rather than the latest poorly edited Llewellyn mess: the Burning Times didn’t happen, different kinds of Pagans warred amongst themselves long before Christianity came onto the scene, there was no great unified Pagan religion before Christianity, and Gerald Gardner was probably lying about almost everything he said.)


You Should Probably Learn the Difference Between Paganism, Wicca, and Witchcraft

What is Paganism?

Pagan is an umbrella term for a member of a religious, spiritual, or cultural community, other than those of the main world religions, so:

Non-Abrahamic – it is not Christian, Catholic, Jewish, Muslim, or Mormon

Non-Eastern – it is not Buddhism, Hinduism, Taoism, Sufism, or Sikhism

Theistic – The belief in some kind of divine power, which is sometimes polytheistic (a belief in more than one god), but not always

Some Pagans practice witchcraft – others do not.

This definition isn’t quite right, though it’s in hugely common usage, because there are Abrahamic and Eastern persons who consider themselves Pagan. Keep in mind that there will be exceptions to this definition and that those exceptions are valid.

There are also secular Pagans, so it isn’t even always Theistic. I know – it’s complicated. Though this is the largely accepted Academic definition, it doesn’t really work when applied to the real world, if you’re considering someone saying, “I’m Pagan” as a self-identifying definition, which I do. 

Wicca

Wicca is a religion. Most people consider Wicca as falling under the Paganism umbrella, although not all Pagans are Wiccan. Not all Wiccans are witches, and not all witches are Wiccan.

Wiccan is generally defined as:

Dualistic – There is a God and a Goddess

Pacifistic – Wicca has a rede that requires Wiccan do no harm to themselves or others, though not all Wiccans (such as those who follow Doreen Valiente’s suggested guidelines) are Pacifistic, so there are definitely exceptions to this

Earth-based – Having a respect for and acknowledgment of the powers of the Earth

Witchcraft

The spiritual or secular art, craft, and/or practice of the witch, defined many ways by many different people.

A witch is a witch who says they are one.

Again, there is no witch Pope and no witchy excommunication because you define yourself as a witch differently than someone else does.

Yes, male identifying and/or presenting persons can be witches.


Pagan and Witch Fallacies

There are certain ideas that most beginners in the witchcraft community will encounter over and over again. I’m going to run down some things – with the reminder, again, that I can only speak for my personal tradition.

1. “You should remove all negative influences from your life! You should purge all negative feelings! Be positive all the time!” Not everything that is negative is bad. Not everything negative can be avoided – we can’t all just quit our jobs and live in a witch shack in the mountains. We have to endure negative things, both because it is healthier to experience the full range of human emotion rather than to ignore a large chunk of it, and because it isn’t possible. What we should do is stop victim blaming witches who are going through hard times and stop telling witches they can’t be angry when they encounter something that should be angering.

2. “But, tradition!” Just because an affluent white guy in the 1400-1600s said something, doesn’t mean you should do it. We don’t follow their medicinal advice anymore; we don’t have to follow their magickal advice either. Seriously, I don’t care if tradition says a trans woman shouldn’t be in a sky clad ritual – that’s bullshit. We don’t put leeches on our bodies anymore – let’s leave the past nonsense where it belongs.

3. “We have to make sure everyone feels included and welcome!” Not if they abuse the welcome of others, we do not. The problem with making some people feel included and welcome is that you make their victims feel excluded and unwelcome because you’ve made them unsafe.

4. “We have to support each other and love each other and be a positive force in people’s lives.” Okay, yes, in small doses, this is a great aim. It doesn’t work for everyone (some witches are spite and malice fueled and they are still witches), but okay, it’s a nice idea. Until it becomes ableist or demands free emotional labor from people, which it often does.

5. “We have to educate them!” Okay, it’s great that there is this effort in the community to educate others. But if you don’t have the spoons or if it seems like they’re using the demand for their own education as a way to still have access to a community they are abusing, then no, you have no obligation to put their education over your well being. None. They have access to Google (even if they have to go to a library to use it.)

6. “You have to earn your right to be a witch.” No, no you don’t. Seriously, though, from whom? Dusty white men in graves? A Llewellyn author who couldn’t fact check themselves out of a paper bag? Again – no witch Pope. I’m just gonna keep pointing out the lack of a witch Pope until people get it.

7. “You have to be ________ rank, degree, etc. to have an opinion on this topic.” Yeah, okay, I’ll be sure to wave my certificate in your face before having an opinion on my own tradition. No. Your opinion may be an uneducated one and you may be corrected for it, but that doesn’t mean that you didn’t have the right to it before you completed your O levels at Hogwarts.

8. As a corollary to above, “This is just my opinion and you can’t be mad at me for it!” People absolutely have a right to their opinions. And everyone else the right to decide those opinions make them an asshole.

9. “I’m super special and powerful because xyz, which means I get to tell you what to do.” People only get to tell you what to do if you let them. Sometimes, that’s an exchange we willingly make, but other times, people will feel they have the right to tell you what to do because they are a hereditary witch or because they’ve been practicing longer. Just remember – their position doesn’t trump your humanity and you don’t have to kiss the feet of someone who kicks you.

10. “The person really wants _____ from you, and you should help them on their path. Helping them on their path helps you on yours!” Just because someone wants something from you, doesn’t mean they get it. Being a witch doesn’t take away your right to say no.  


Please remember that you don’t have to earn your right to be here. This one is tricky on some level – to be the respected person in your community, you need to put in your time. However, in order to be part of a group you don’t need to give the High Priest a blow job (seriously, run).

You don’t have to earn admission to witchcraft, but you do have to earn specific positions and other people’s trust. If you teach people not to trust you through your actions, they won’t trust you.

oikawacannot  asked:

top 5 oikawa gifs xD ((btw i love your blog + edits <33))

How…is….a person…supposed….to choose…RIP

1. This is the only one I’m 100% sure about, it has been my header for the longest time and I still adore it

2. This is so painful what am I even doing (yes, this is THE LAST toss of Oikawa’s high school career, and it was aimed at Iwaizumi. Of course)

3. I could watch him serve all day every day until the end of time 

4. SCRUNCY POUTY FACE 

5. So beautiful I’m crying this is probably one of my favorite shots of him in the entire series

- bonus: since you didn’t specify which Oikawa you were talking about, let’s have my favorite gif of stage play Oikawa too for good measure

Originally posted by alliandoalice

Thank you for your message!

Ask me my top 5 things!

Anti theory time

This post is going to be a longer one but with different sections to break it up a bit, per loose theory bits and I’ll try and keep it organized. Includes images woo! Gifs and images are compiled by me (first tries at video gifs yay). But without further ado!

1. At PAX Anti sported two, very deliberately, neck stab wounds. Maybe from one jab, maybe two. (That they are stab wounds is sortof confirmed by a post from @wubkins that Jack liked). And the placement is rather suspicious, its right where the vocal cords are.

Why the vocal cords? Most likely to shut Jack up and to not get interrupted during his little message to us (but Jack did try though with a very broken ‘Help me’). And Anti probably doesn’t need vocal cords anyway since he is most likely some kind of spirit/ghost/entity capable of 'out of body’ speech.

2. What kind of being could he be? The Tulpa has been going around as a theory and Jack himself has said that it’s fairly accurate (answered in an ask). A section of the Wikipedia page about it gives this bit:

'Playing the part of a real being’ is the part that creeps me out the most. Anti pretending to be Jack, slowly taking over the channel. People find it difficult to distinguish between them.

But despite Anti being the chameleon that he is, he is not flawless in his doings. He gets impatient very quickly, is often very rude and more aggressive than Jack. Absolutely loves violence. Going as far as wanting to chop off fingers for fun (EVERYTHING IS AGONY | Clone Drone #5).

Full Wikipedia Tulpa link here: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tulpa It’s quite the interesting read. Heck, I could fill another whole paragraph about this stuff haha.

But where did Anti come from? Another part of the Wikipedia page says that Tulpa’s are generated by a powerful concentration of thought. Who’s thoughts in the case of Anti? The community? It might have started when the community started drawing/imagining/writing about a counterpart to Jack, his anti version. That was most likely the start of the inevitable snowball that accelerated during the October of 2016 and on Halloween itself Anti 'solidified’, was powerful enough, thanks to the attention the community gave him, to take over. “You could have stopped me, but you just watched, as this happened”.

He then proceeds to brag about Jack being gone forever but that might not be the case. Anti has taken over Jacks body but Jack is still around, in the background, crying out for help. Or in the case of the intro of EVERYTHING IS AGONY | Clone Drone #5, shouting stuff to Anti about what not to do. Two 'souls’ in one body kind of thing.

3. Glitchverse and dimension breaking. What exactly are the glitches that Anti is doing? Just video glitches or something more.

Anti does like his 'green’ dimension a lot, as well as fades/cuts to black. During these bits the viewer can’t see what is happening. During these blackouts the switch between Jack and Anti seems to happen a lot. Also during the blackout of the Detention episode the character went through a door with doors usually being the symbol for gateways. Might be a far stretch with the blackouts but it has happened quite a few times. Down below are gifs of the several blackouts, in chronological order of appearance.

4. Anti’s message at PAX. Ohboy. This was just brilliant. I attended the livestream and when Jack mentioned the participation thing, I too grabbed my phone to start recording but then Anti said hi. After finishing recording and getting hyped from that and watching the panel itself I did not think much of it at first. But the day after I realized something, why did Anti wanted that we record him…? Now I don’t know if there are any Whovians around but my mind immediately strayed to the Doctor Who episodes of the The Time of Angels, where a recording of a Weeping Angel came to life. Quoting the Doctor: 'That which holds the image of an angel becomes itself an angel’.

And if that’s the case with Anti, well, he’s probably just be grinning his ass off of the fact that we just multiplied him everywhere. And are we going to delete that footage? Not likely. It was too much hype. But watch your back. '͞I͝'͝m ̛not ̕going ̀a͘nywher̡é,́ I̧'́m̨ a̶l͡wa͏y͜s t͜hére, ͏a͘l̶w͟ays̛ ̧wàt͝c͟h͞i̸ng̀'͘.

5. The glitch video montage.

Gif is at 50% percent of original speed, my brain is molten from seeing it at full speed too many times haha. @amycampbell00 did an amazing job at splicing the segment down, frame by frame, game by game over here.

It’s quite odd to think that Clustertruck, Totally Accurate Battle Simulator and Happy Wheels are in this compilation since it’s before the Halloween event but if Anti has been lurking around for some time then these series are perfect. Why? Clustertruck is a high energy game and Jack has mentioned that he gets all pumped up from it. Anti could sneakishly drain this energy from him, tiny piece by piece since he probably wouldn’t miss it anyway.

Why TABS and Happy Wheels? Well… Death, violence and gore. Again, Anti getting energy from this.

And what if the other games in the montage are the series that Anti has played/is playing. The Japan World Cup is probably one of the distraction ones, just like the Pipe Job one with a sneaky Anti at the end.

The Portal Collab and Don’t Starve ones have gotten me a tiny bit worried about Jacks friends. If they can’t tell the difference then, yikes, doomed.

Also, I’m still trying to figure out the message of the montage. The different audio segments. My feeble guess at what he says?

'Ha, ha, ha. Jack is dead, bitch. Now I’m terrified.’

First part makes kind of sense, second part, not so much. I’ve listened to the segment a heap load of times now but I’m not getting much wiser haha.

And these are my Anti theory bits for now. To anyone reading this, thank you. Also, have a cookie!

Feel free to share your thoughts about things. It’s a lot of fun going through all the theories that people have come up with so far and it gets me all excited. Good for story inspiration stuff too.


-eve

anonymous asked:

Hi, what exactly is Stargate (like, what is the plot, how many seasons, that kind of thing)? I've seen it mentioned in combination with Leverage in some of your posts, and I've sort of picked up some of the character names from being on the internet, but I'm still not sure what it actually is. Thanks!!

What a delightful question that I’m going to have a ridiculous amount of fun answering, probably using too many gifs.

First, the bare bones facts: Stargate is a franchise that began with the 1994 movie Stargate, which was then developed into the TV show Stargate: SG-1 which began in 1997 and picked up about a year after the movie ended. SG-1 had 10 seasons and 2 made-for-TV movies. There are also 2 spinoffs, Stargate: Atlantis and Stargate: Universe. Atlantis has 5 seasons, and its first season coincides with season 8 of SG-1, with both beginning in 2004, with some fun but not strictly essential crossover between the two. Universe has 2 seasons and began in 2009, after both SG-1 and Atlantis had ended. I mostly blog about SG-1, but I enjoy all three shows and will at least briefly explain Atlantis and Universe in the course of this post, FOR FUNSIES.

The basic premise of the whole thing is that there are these devices (built by aliens, OF COURSE) called Stargates, which create wormholes that allow for basically instantaneous travel between planets all throughout the Milky Way (and other galaxies as well, it turns out, but that’s later).

The movie involves the US Air Force, with the help of the BEST FICTIONAL ARCHAEOLOGIST IN EXISTENCE FIGHT ME, figuring out how to work the Stargate, using it to travel to another planet, and helping the locals overthrow the evil parasitic alien who was posing as the Egyptian god Ra in order to enslave them.

SG-1 starts with Earth humans learning that “Ra” actually belonged to an entire race of evil parasitic aliens who used the personas of various gods to enslave humans throughout the galaxy. At which point, NATURALLY, the plucky Earth humans say “fuck that shit” and also “ooh, a whole galaxy to explore, HOLD MY BEER” and start having adventures and liberating the galaxy.

Atlantis is about Earth humans finally discovering the lost city of Atlantis over in another galaxy, and the adventures and struggles they have setting up a colony there. Also, space vampires.

Universe is about a bunch of Earth humans accidentally stranding themselves aboard an alien-built spaceship that is going they don’t know where in order to find the meaning of life, the universe, and everything. It’s much darker and more sort of psychological than the other two shows. Also more diverse. I like it a lot, but for different reasons than I like SG-1 and Atlantis.

SG-1 owns my heart, because it’s the show that helped me fall in love with sci-fi. Also, it has Dr. Daniel Jackson. It wrestles with what it means to be human and ethics and all kinds of really good shit. It’s not perfect, and the early seasons especially have some pretty major issues with sexism and white savior complexes in certain episodes, but overall I personally find it more than worth it, and the main reason is the characters, who you now get to hear me yell about my love for.

Keep reading

Dear harmos,

Please don’t ruin this for Mani by saying insane things and alienating her fanbase from the others. She needs all the support she can get and it needs to come by way of her dancing prowess and overall presence on the show. You can be supportive of Normani without demeaning other people’s favorites okay?

Thanks,

management

25.01.17 Holiday Studying

It’s my holiday, so I’m using the blank paper method to check my knowledge before I head off into 5th year. 

We had a clinical preparedness MCQ a few weeks ago that tested everything we had learnt in the past 4 years with a pass mark of 70%, and that went well (don’t have to do it again, yay!) but I still feel like there’s more that I don’t know. 

Probably won’t get through too many because I’m still enjoying my holidays, but I’ll get through a few diseases at least, which is better than nothing! :D


MY WEEKLY STUDY TIPS

WHAT I WISH I’D KNOWN BEFORE UNIVERSITY STUDY TIPS SERIES

SEE ALSO

And yet another tag game...

Rules | Answer the 20 questions and tag as many amazing followers as you want that you’d like to get to know better! I was tagged by the lovely @highlightsofeverything

Name: Frida
Nicknames: don’t really have any, or not any that makes sense in english lol
Zodiac sign: Aries
Height: 5,6
orientation: who the fuck knows, don’t really like to identify myself because i’m so young and i’ll probably change my mind
Nationality: Sweden
Favourite fruit: idk like mango?
Favourite season: depends on which country but the summers in Sweden usually don’t get too hot so i like it a lot but otherwise maybe like spring??
Favourite book: this is gonna sound really like tumblr and cheesy but the perks of being a wallflower is one of my favourite books ever
Favourite flower: sunflowers and also geraniums because they smell really weird and i like that
Favourite scent: again geraniums but also like jasmine (not the princess, the flower)
Favourite colour: red and like really dark blue
Favourite animal: idk maybe cat? i’ve always been a dog person but lately i’ve realised that cats are pretty great
coffee, tea or hot cocoa: i usually drink tea but i like coffee too but i get way to anxious when i drink it tho
average sleep hours: 5-7
cat or dog person: both
favourite fictional character: Diego from ice age or maybe Scar from the lion king but i could also talk about spider man for hours
Number of blankets you sleep with: 1
dream trip: i’ve always wanted to go to Berlin or Amsterdam and just ride my bike
blog created: my first ever blog was maybe created in 2014?? but this one was created like a year ago but i’ve only been active for about 2 months

And the people i tag is:
@pastel-josh
@twentyonequasars
@duncare
@angellfallendown
@takeeittsloww
@isleofsleeplessbirds
@reeltrashcan and anyone else that wanna do this!! This is just people that i like to get to know better but you obviously don’t have to do it if you don’t want to

Why furries should be added to lgbt!

1. We are totally oppressed. We are hated by a so many and being added to this could really help out our community.
2. Furry is a gender. Many people think we are a fandom but I personally identify as a fire duck.
3. So little people are uncultured about furries. We often get asked “what are furries” which shows that not many people are aware of what they are. Being added to lgbt would be good to help understand what we are.
4. Lgbt is for all genders and sexualities yet us furries are not in there.
5. People hate us furries but are super supportive of lgbt+ and other genders. Adding us too lgbt could bring a lot of support and would probably help us furries feel more secure about coming out.

speculation compilation #45

Speculation regarding the Interlude specifically! A few of these came in a little earlier than the others, so I’ve categorized them accordingly.

Speculation as of page 35:

This direction was considered early on, but we decided to have the divergence from canon be very inconspicuous, and controlled solely by Chara without Asriel’s interference.

It is said that buttercups don’t taste very good, so the pie was probably bitter too! Perhaps all that sugar masked the taste. Asgore gets some credit for eating so much of that pie for the sake of the kids. (And it’s a good thing no one else ate it!)


Speculation as of page 36:

Chara did not suggest the plan off camera in this AU.

Actually, you were right the first time. Chara decides not to tell Asriel of the plan, which is why Asriel does not cry on Tape 4. (In this AU, there is no Tape 4 and 5, at least, not the same way as in game.)

Truly, the theories many of you had on what would change was brilliant! However, we wanted the divergence to be something very very simple and subtle. In this moment, there are two branching paths. In canon, Chara tells Asriel the plan, and it leads to the game we all know and love. This AU follows the other path where Chara hesitates and opts to say nothing. What were they thinking? Where will it lead? Well, I suppose you’ll have to wait and see.

Constants and variables…

Now that i’m done with my 2nd year, fourth semester, of veterinary school, it’s time for the semi-annual list of things I have learned this semester:

1) Hydrogen Peroxide has not been shown to actually reduce infection rates in wounds. In fact, they may actually delay wound healing. But vinegar may have some possible antiseptic capability in wounds.
2) Medical Grade Honey is a thing.
3) Honey Bees need Vets too.
4) Dairy Cows are very sensitive to what people think about them and how they look.
5) Turtles are reclassified as chelonians.
6) The world is littered with flat squirrels that couldn’t decide which way to go.
7) Spelling is not an indicator of IQ.
8) My new favorite diagnostic sign is “rainbow vomit” on an echo.
9) Medical terms make great names for video game characters.
10) Superman could not conceive a child with Lois Lane.
11) Cats get idiopathic hypertension as a hobby.
12) Organ Assault Team sounds a lot like Oregon Assault Team. Either one is probably not good. Don’t be a part of the Organ Assault Team.
13) Too many things sound the same.
14) One thing can have too many different names.
15) “Sometimes you got to bleed to know that you’re alive and have a soul.” -Twenty One Pilots
16) “The only thing certain is uncertainty.”
17) “Three grand essentials to happiness in this life are something to do, something to love, and something to hope for. ” - Joseph Addison

And of course many other things, but less comical. Here is to being half-way to “Doctor” status, but more importantly here is to halfway to being a veterinarian and making an impact in the lives of both people and animals.

@abominableobriens tagged me for an author self-rec ask meme (so many good ships, damn)

Since this is my check please blog, I’m only gonna do my check please fic here.  I’d include blue neighborhood ‘verse, but since it’s not all posted yet, I’m going to leave it off the five for now.

Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you’ve written, then pass on to at least five other writers (◠‿◠✿)”

1) midnight whisperings. (AO3, rebloggable on tumblr), Bitty/Jack/Kent (Bitty/Jack and Jack/Kent polyamorous V)

Jack feels places in his bones. He always has, before he had a camera in his hands to crystallize moments, to try to capture some small measure of what a place means on film. He doesn’t know how else to process places than to remember them as layers of feelings and sensations built up over time.

But making sense of how Kent Parson feels is a complicated process.

For me, this was one of those kind of wring yourself dry fics that came out of nowhere.  I really, really am very fond of it, though.  It’s a pretty introspective fic, focused a lot on dealing with complex feelings and with the way time changes things, but I’m proud of the way the words flow together.

2) when the full moon turns white (that’s when i’ll come home). (AO3tumblr), Dex/Nursey

Nursey hasn’t been a werewolf for all that long, and while he knows he can keep most things under wraps, he doesn’t even always trust himself.

That’s what the rope is for, more than anything. For his own peace of mind.

Every fandom needs a Teen Wolf-style werewolf AU with full moon bondage adventures, right?  I’m pretty sure that’s definitely a thing.  Anyway, I really like the opening to this fic, and I think I achieved the vibe I was going for.

3) down by the water. (AO3, tumblr), Holster/Ransom

“It doesn’t even make sense,” Holster had protested on the drive over. It was an empty protest, and he didn’t pursue it. After all, the Niagara Falls trip is sacred. Sure, they may both be living in an apartment in Boston together, now, but it’s Canada’s turn.

Ransom conceded a Tim Horton’s trip and agreed to an IHOP one in exchange for the longer drive, because he’s a good boyfriend.

This was just some nice fluffy Holsom going on their annual Niagra Falls date.  If I ever wrote sequels I’d write the proposal that’s inevitably gonna happen there in the future, but I am terrible and rarely write follow-up fics.

4) i don’t know you (but i want you so bad). (AO3, tumblr) Bitty/Kent

Bitty knows better than to think that everyone is what they seem. Bitty’s used to taking people with a grain of salt. He’s from the South, where there isn’t a soul without a passive-aggressive bone in their body. Everyone keeps their skeletons in the closet, and family business stays family business unless someone goes and runs their mouth. Or until the neighbors come snooping, which they always do.

Bitty isn’t naive enough to think that Kent Parson is all quiet smiles and shiny sharpie signatures.

This fic is what happens when you listen to Songs About Jane (specifically, Secret) by Maroon 5 too many times in a row.  This fic is important to me because Bitty wrestles with something that I think a lot of fic doesn’t have the space to capture.  He’s a semi-closeted southern boy who was bullied back in Georgia for being small and not traditionally masculine-coded, aka probably largely for being a Suspected Gay.  He’s probably never felt wanted in his entire life, not in a way that is blatant and open and something he can process.  And that’s a very overwhelming thing.  Feeling wanted for the first time.  Especially by someone he finds objectively attractive.  Especially by someone he has very mixed and muddled impressions of.  It’s hard to sort through.

5) naked sunday. (AO3, tumblr) Lardo/Shitty

“You’re gonna get naked aren’t you,” Lardo said. Her eyes weren’t so sharp as they usually were after smoking a joint down to the roach, but she’d heard the rumors about Shitty’s penchant for nudity. Probably from Jack, honestly.

“Ch’yeah,” Shitty said. “Once I can feel my fingers enough to deal with buttons.”

Trans man Shitty and Lardo getting a soft naked morning together is important to me.

I’m tagging @yoursummerfrost , @queerlyalex , @rushingsnowy , @dexsnursey , @mighty-alphalpha, and whoever else wants to do it.

anonymous asked:

Atomi. It has come time for a convention once again and I'm kinda getting the nervous butterflies thing. Do you have any tips for that?-Abby

I don’t know if I go to enough conventions to really be asked advice on this, but if you’re asking about things about the artist alley, the I might be much help.

If you’re more asking for general advice, I guess this is what I usually do:

1. The 6-2-1 rule. If you’re staying at a con for multiple days, this is the bare minimum that needs to be done to make sure you’re taking proper care of yourself. Get 6 hours of sleep (at minimum), eat 2 meals a day (snacks are optional), and shower everyday.

2. Stay hydrated. Especially if it’s going to be a really hot day.Keep water with you at all times.

3. Know where your exits are. Maybe this is more just a habit that I do, but whenever I go to the exhibition hall, I like to map out where all the exits are. That way in case in the event that something happens and I need to get the hell out of there, I know where I can go to get out.

4. If you have to (and you’re probably going to have to) don’t be scared to shout “excuse me” or muscle your way through a crowd. It’s a con, so you’re going to be around a lot of people, many of which are probably not paying attention. Get their attention to get them to move. Last resort is going to be to push past them.

5. If being in a large crowd becomes too much, leave and find a place where you can chill for a bit. Me personally, large crowds make me anxious, so if I need to, I like to find a place away from the larger crowds and rest for a bit. If the crowds are causing anxiety or panic, there’s no need to keep yourself in that situation for long periods of time.

6. If you’re buying stuff, buy the things you really want the most, first. Resist the urge to impulse buy on the first day, especially if you don’t have a lot of money to spend. If there’s something you want, but not that badly, wait till the last day. Sometimes vendors will do discounts in order to get rid of their stock as quickly as possible.

7. Are you going with friends? Good! If your friends are planning to go to different locations, make sure you keep each other posted on where you’re going to be, and where you can meet up. That way it’ll take less time to find one another, and make sure no is getting lost.

8. In the event that you are lost, ask one of the staff members for help.

9. Pack your own food. Again, this mostly applies if you’re going multiple days, but if your hotel room has a fridge, pack your own meals. It’ll help save money on food costs. And as a personal note, I tend to not trust the food they serve at conventions. Last time I got food at the convention cafeterias, I got mild food poisoning. If you must eat at the convention, go to a food truck, or a cafe like Starbucks, but don’t go to the cafeterias if you don’t have to. 

10. Don’t forget to have fun! I know conventions can be a little nerve-wracking, but they can be a lot of fun. And if you don’t get to so all the things you wanted to that day, that’s alright. It’s a day to have fun and hang out with people and be total geeks about it. Do what’s fun for you, and I hope you have a great time!

P.S be nice to cosplayers and con staff. Ask permission before taking photos or interacting with cosplayers (ex. high-five, hugging, etc.) and clean up after yourself.

Anyways, I think that’s all that comes to mind at the moment. I hope this helps a little. I hope you have a great time at the convention. ^^

 Things wrong with the bleach ending overall:

  • Too much build up for a final boss battle that ended in one panel.
  • All secondary characters and their unresolved backstories were rendered useless. (Did Bazz-B die? What the fuck happened with Kira Izuru - why was that added in? What about Grimmjow and Tia and Nel? What about Yumichika’s shikai? Not going to resolve any of that?)
  • Everything is completely and perfectly peaceful after that miraculous end to all evil everywhere courtesy of Ichigo. Very coincidentally simple after all that insane buildup. Like blowing up a balloon and letting the air back out to make a fart noise instead of just popping it.
  • Mysterious unexplained Ywach power readings pulled out of the series’ ass at the very end just so there’s an enemy for the kids to fight and defeat in one page.
  • The fact that the final chapter was called ‘a perfect end.’

Things right with the bleach ending overall:

  • Ichigo survived the series and went on to live his life.
  • Renji survived his battle with Bach and seemed to get his left arm back.
  • Hisagi’s (fake??) bankai, meaning he’s made peace with Kazeshini.
  • Squad 11 mains are all still alive. (Ikkaku made lieutenant and Yumichika gets his third seat.)
  • Iba’s lame hairstyle.
  • Renji’s rad hairstyle.
  • Final Akon cameo.
  • Hisagi doesn’t seem to be shy around Rangiku anymore.
  • Shunsui still drinks with and talks to Juushiro’s gravestone.
  • Toshiro reverted to his small cute self. (Does this mean his bankai regressed, or???)

Things wrong with the bleach epilogue spoilers:

  • ‘Welp, might as well shove together the male and female protagonists who are in the same age group and who had no prior romantic interest in each other right at the end of the story to have a super nonlame and noncliche ending:’ said every writer ever.
  • Renji and Rukia got together. Not hating on renruki shippers (if you’re into that theory that male-female best friends secretly want to fuck, then okay) just saying, kinda’ weird that it took them centuries to get together and then they went straight to having kids…. while they’re still soldiers. Is there shinigami daycare or something? I mean, Rukia’s a captain now and Renji’s a lieutenant. Who’s taking care of their kid? Why did they have a kid so soon? Don’t they want at least 40+ years to just be married in their weird best-friendy marriage without worrying about kids? What the fuck.
  • Renruki kid looks like a stupid fanfiction mishmash of ‘daddy’ and ‘mommy’s’ traits. That hairstyle in the spoiler pic is absolutely horrible. Rukia and Renji’s hairstyles did not need to be mixed, and by the way, kid’s don’t change their hairstyle so that it will be a perfect blend of their parents’.
  • Why are the kids shinigami during peacetime? They ain’t even academy students, they’re full on uniformed shinigami?? The fuck.
  • Are Ichigo and Orihime married? Why are they married? DId Ichigo get his brain electroshocked and suddenly decide that oh wait, ‘Oh, Inoue, I actually notice you now despite not noticing you consistently for the past several years.’ And Orihime, really? You still like the guy you fell for in high school? Who routinely made it obvious that he had no interest? Girl, you deserve someone who at least likes you. BESIDES, WHO STICKS WITH THE PERSON THEY MET IN HIGH SCHOOL? There’s so many more people out there! Did you just decide when you met Ichigo that you were going to be bf and gf 5ever and close up shop?      Why are they married?
  • Don’t think I don’t realize that Orihime looks like Masaki either and that it’s why Orihime didn’t end up with Uryu, who actually liked her. Oh, really clever making a parallel of the Masaki-Ryuuken-Isshin situation. Lame, Kubo. Lame. Orihime deserved someone who loved her and paid attention to her. You’ve sold her short so many times and this is too far.
  • When did Ichigo have a kid? He’s only 27 now right? For the kid to be reasonably old enough to have even a training sword, they should be like 10, meaning Ichigo would’ve had the kid at 17, which he didn’t. Maybe they’re 5 years old with a sword, meaning he had a kid at 22? Meaning he probably got married at like 19??? Ichigo, you had your whole life ahead of you, and you got married and made babies so young? What about your career? What about your life? Were you that eager to end your adventures to settle down with a kid? You certainly weren’t happy last time you lost your powers and had to live normally. God damnit, this makes no sense.
  • WAIT, THEIR SOn IS SUPPOSEDLY NINE. THEY GOT MARRIED AT 17 AND HAD A KID AT 18. IN JAPAN, THAT’S STILL FUCKING UNDERAGE. ICHIGO, WOW. WHY. goddamnit this means Rukia and Renji had their kid immediately too, wtf, wayta get to business.
  • Why did Ichigo have a kid? He hates putting the people he loves in danger, and he knows that the child is going to be involved in Shinigami business basically from birth. he’d never do that. Literally never. As someone else pointed out, it’s literally the reason he hid being a Shinigami from his family, because he didn’t want to endanger them. And you think he’d do that to his child?
  • Why did Ichigo have a child? Never mind that he never loved Orihime - because okay, maybe over ten years he had a change of heart, who’s to say, oh wait no, he married her at seventeen and didn’t have time to have a change of heart- but why did he have a kid when he’s a four-way hybrid? What kind of crazy life does he want to inflict on a child, especially now that they’re like a five-way hybrid, considering Orihime’s powers. Ugh, OC mary-sue baby.
  • OC Mary sue baby resolves the crisis, confines Aizen, and dispells Ywach’s powers in one fell swoop. Well done kid.       G UHH.
  • Why are kids responsible for saving the world? A fucking five-year-old?
  • Did Ichigo lose his powers defeating Bach? Questions I want answered.
  • Has Aizen been roaming free for ten fucking years? And there’s been peacetime during this? Was there a manhunt? Did they let him free? I have many questions.
  • Rukia is mother of the year, reasoning that her child, who is fucking lost after presumably losing her parents in the FUCKING DANGAI -nevermind that she could be fucking dead because of the Koryu and the Kototsu???- can’t get hurt by a human because oh, she’s a shinigami. Her child is a shinigami soldier. With a sword. GOd damnit.   
  • why did Renji and Rukia not adopt after their bad past being orphans in the rukongai? Why did they not adopt?? Why, why, why? That’s the kind of big-hearted people that they are???
  • please don’t add the OC babies to the ao3 character tags. just please don’t.
  • Why is Yuzu still living at home at twenty three?
  • Is Isshin dead?
  • Uryu vowed not to become a doctor? Why is he a doctor? Did he take over his father’s hospital? Double the fuck? he hates his father?
  • Chad promised never to use his strength for his own gain. Did he say fuck it and decide to do WBO? THE FUCK.
  • WHAT THE FUCK HAS HAPPENED TO ALL THE PROTAGONISTS AND THEIR ORIGINAL LIFE GOALS? IT’S LIKE THEY ENDED UP DOING THE EXACT OPPOSITE. except Orihime. She’s Ichigo’s housemaid just like she convinced herself she wanted to be. BABY, YOU COULD’VE HAD BETTER.
  • Ichigo didn’t know who Renji and Rukia’s kid was when she first visited, meaning that Ichigo hasn’t seen them for like ten years. Those fuckers didn’t even goddamn visit or tell them about their OC baby.
  • AND GREAT, both the 5-7 year old kids have swords and are shinigami. Great. Great.
  • I bet their kids are a boy and a girl so that they can fall in love and have happy hetero relationships despite their lack of chemistry, just like both sets of their parents, huh, because we don’t believe in platonic male-female friendships. Nope.

by the way, what was the special ‘announcement?’ that this ending was completely and totally rushed and fucked up after all the hard work Kubo put into creating this world and these characters?

Things right with the bleach epilogue spoilers:

  • we can choose to ignore it.
  • we can now write renichi brokeback mountain au fanfics.
  • life goes on despite this devastating disappointment.
  • if you didn’t ship any of the main hetero ships, this doesn’t have to affect you.
  • if you followed Naruto, you were ready for this shit anyways.
  • mourn.
  • reread the series up until Aizen is first defeated, and then pretend it ended there.
  • move on.
  • and ichiruki shippers, you knew this was coming, didn’t you? Kubo’s said that he was proud of the platonic relationship he made between Ichigo and Rukia. Even though I don’t like Ichiruki or Ichihime, I still understand why you’re crying bowls of tears, because Ichihime shippers will now forever have the excuse that their ship is canon even though the ship has no evidence to back it up except for this one chapter. Seriously, wow. You Ichihime shippers don’t deserve to be smug over this half-assed victory.
  • And you know what? After the final chapter I can’t help but like the adorable kids because they’re sweet and pure, but they still never should have fucking existed. Goddamn fanfic babies.

—–

Kubo, really, who made you do this? Tell us so that we can seek retribution.

anonymous asked:

How many stories are in your transfigurations book? I wanna do an e-book too but I don't know how many stories I should put in one, and then how the price should reflect the number within. Thanks Mr. Max, you're the greatest

I think I have ten in there. I underpriced the shit out of it, though, which I only did out of insecurity. If I had to publish that one again, it would’ve been probably $5. The new one will be $8 for the Kindle edition and more for the paperback, but it’ll be longer.

Top 5 According to You

It’s probably going to be a decent amount of time before the next top 5 so I decided to put together the top 5 based on the most popular ones.

Those People - Not surprised this one takes the cake. I have rewatched this too many times. Two childhood friends navigate adulthood along with their personal lives interfering.

4th Man Out - Again, not surprised. A young man comes out to his friends which alters their friendships in many different ways. It doesn’t help he’s in love with his best friend.

Bromance - This one did surprise me a little bit that it’s so popular. A guy gets tangled up with his friend who is tangled up with his girlfriend. Of course this blows up.

A Escondidas - This one, I needed more from this one, but it was so amazing. A young man’s friendships are shaken when he chooses to befriend an individual the group dislikes.

DaddyHunt - This is extremely short but they do so much with the time they use. Fun fact, season 2 part one is out now. A man mistakes his neighbor for the building’s handyman and an interesting relationship takes off from there.

I feel bad because I’m not online as much and I wanna be better friends with everyone. Also, a lot of the time I type a lot when I message and that can be overwhelming (etc tho I won’t hold it against you if you don’t reply for 5 years bc same) sometimes, I know 8′) which is probably why I like twitter-style communication a lot but I don’t like making many short text posts either…

but I still wanna be good…I wanna send you asks and comment on your posts…I wanna @ you in things…I want people to feel free to message me whenever they want (or to be welcoming as much as possible)…you know what I mean? but maybe it’s partly bc of the self-imposed rules I have on this blog too. hmm.

anyway for like the 5th time I’m prob gonna revise those rules and post whatever whenever, like I used to when I first made this blog, but I only reblogged like 1-3 things most days so really it’s not much. and either change my theme or the font to a sans-serif so it’s easier to read?? I’M SORRY I’M SUCH A FLAKE LMAO thank you for putting up with my garbage

anonymous asked:

This blog is so good!! Can I request a scenario where the reader is a shinobi who is invading the Akatsuki base but she gets caught?

Thank you for the request. This was a little tricky for me cause I didnt want it to get overly complicated so I hope you enjoy the result. 

Reader infiltrates the Akatsuki’s base

Your heart was beating quickly inside your chest as you tried to slow your breathing. Sweat dripped down your back. You kept quiet, hearing only the soft exhales from your nose and the eerie silence that surrounded you in the dark and cold enclosed space. They had discovered you.

They were searching for you in their underground bunker that was filled with many twists and turns that felt like a maze. You barely knew your way around and knew it was only a matter of time before they caught you. They were highly skilled shinobi and the possibility of surviving an encounter with them was probably less than a 5% chance, which was why you had to remain hidden until you could somehow make an escape.

You were on a mission to infiltrate and gather as much information on the Akatsuki’s hideout and plans as possible, but now you were thinking maybe you took it too far. You were lucky enough not to have been caught the previous day but now the second day wasn’t looking to bright.

Your muscles were cramping and your energy was running low. It was hard to keep the suppression of your chakra at bay, knowing the moment you slipped up would be the moment they would find you. After all, that’s what alerted the Leader of the Akatsuki to your presence.

You slightly shudder when you suddenly heard the sounds of creaking wood from around you, but you dared not move. There was also soft and barely audible footsteps that had entered the hallway as you tried not to breath, listening intently.

“What a pest,” you heard the ruff voice of Sasori grumble.

“Remember, Leader-sama wants the intruder captured alive,” the smooth voice of Itachi’s replied.

“I’m well aware. Otherwise he would have sent Deidara to eradicate this place,” Sasori commented, annoyed. “You haven’t sensed its presences yet?”

“No. The intruder must be a sensory type ninja. Pein had only been aware of the intruder late last night and he has sharper sensory senses than me,” Itachi expressed, coolly.

“Hm, then why isn’t he here to investigate the problem?” Sasori rhetorically asked, monotone.

“I guess he couldn’t be bothered,” Itachi answered anyway. “Plus you can cover quite a bit of ground with your puppets.”

There was more wood creaking sounds as Sasori’s smirked confidently from beneath the confines of his puppet exterior. Your body was shuddering with nerves as you inhaled a much needed breath. You couldn’t stand the idea of creepy puppets looming in after you for your demise. It was one of your worst fears, but you tried to shut out the thought, almost losing concentration on suppressing your chakra.

However, it was too late as you felt the support from under you give way and you fell from the ventilation shaft in front of the two Akatsuki members. You gasped, your control on your chakra submission snapping as you laid frozen in a state of shock as you looked up at the two Akatsuki members.

“What a surprise our pest control problem was in our ventilation system,” Sasori remarked, sarcastically, looking up to where Itachi had cut hole in the metal air duct.

Sasori’s gaze soon came down to looked menacingly at you as Itachi’s eyes never averted their gaze from you. You looked away quickly, knowing you were dead but tried to scramble to your feet in an attempt to flee.

You turned from them with all intentions of running but your path way was blocked by many puppets. You felt your body betray you in fear as a shiver ran down your spine.

“There’s nowhere for you to hide,” Itachi stated, nonchalantly.

You nervously turned back towards Sasori and Itachi, swallowing down your fear. You knew Itachi was right. There was no escape.

Once your eyes met Itachi’s bright red ones, you fell to the ground as you fainted.

Itachi sighed quietly as his eyes reverted back to dark orbs and calmly approached your slumped form, picking you up bridal style. Itachi turned with you in his arms and passed Sasori, heading to Pein’s office to deliver you.

Sasori followed after Itachi, after having one last look at the ventilation system.

“You know Kakuzu won’t be very pleased.”

“Hn.”

That was the least of Itachi’s worries.