wherever i walk

I feel like my life is an endless cycle of getting my act together and then slowly letting it fall apart.  like I have my arms full of objects and every time I try to pick up that last one, another one falls out, and when I keep walking wherever I’m going, the rest start slowly sliding out of my grip too until I have to stop, re-gather, and start the whole process again.

I refuse to keep waiting for you. I am going to walk wherever I go with a smile across my face dressed however I like, not for you anymore. I am going to try to be genuinely happy without you. When I see you with a new girl, I will be prepared and not feel a thing, my chest will not feel as if it were about to explode. I’ve realized my life does not revolve around your entire existence. I can live without you, happily.
—  Baby, I don’t need you.

anonymous asked:

I find the concept of home very interesting. I hadn't thought about it much until recently when I realized that I didn't have one. I have an apartment where I'm living for a few months while at university in a place I will leave the second I graduate, so not at all a home. And where I grew up and where my parents still are most defiantly is not home. I guess it depends a lot and creating roots which to me seems tied to personal identity and as someone extremely closeted I can't really form

it’s just keeping a fine balance between remaining grounded but not digging yourself in too deep. you have a place where you’ve grown up, you have a place where you live now, and you can make anything your home if you want to. just because you know you’ll leave doesn’t mean some place can’t be home for the time being. i lived in paris for just a month a few years back and for the month that i was there, the house i lived in was my home. just ‘cause it was only a month doesn’t mean it wasn’t my home, it was the place where i had my suitcase and a bed that was mine

i mean the way i cope with having the place i live changing all the time is just relying on nature to be my home. the sky looks different on different places on the globe but it’s the same sky, the stars shine in the sky whether you see them or not, the moon’s there most nights. the sun rises everywhere, and it sets everywhere. trees grow almost everywhere, wherever you live there’ll be a park or a little dandelion growing from a crack in the sidewalk, nature envelops the whole globe and because i’ve accepted nature and forests and beaches and just all of that as my ‘home’, i’m never really truly feeling out of place.

when i get that ‘homeless’ anxiety, i go outside. i stare at the sky, i go to the woods, i put my hand on the trunk of a tree or i pick up a leaf, and it goes away. there isn’t a city or place on this earth that doesn’t have nature present in some way or form, and, since it’s so omnipresent, i’ve fixated on nature to give me a homelike feeling when nothing else can. it’s like seeing nature reminds me that i’m a part of nature too, that i’m just a part of this whole huge big ecosystem, and that, by extension, the whole planet’s my home. 

that’s what keeps me grounded when i get those anxious ‘i belong nowhere, i’m nobody’ feelings that everyone gets once in a while

2

“I am alive with the magic you sew in me. I am alive with the skies you have painted me. I am alive and you make me feel like I am living.”-r.i.d ( @inkskinned )

sending everyone good vibes today! hope you all have a kick ass day :)

youtube

Check out what’s coming up
At the turn of the corner
There comes Diego, dancing the rumba
With the moon in his pupils
And in his aquamarine suit
There’s leftover contraband

And where not a single soul more fits
He goes to get his groove on*
Possessed by the ‘ragatanga’ rhythm
And the DJ that knows him
Plays the 12 o’ clock hymn
And for Diego, the song is most anticipated

And he dances it
And he enjoys it
And he sings it….

Asereje ja de je
De jebe tude jebere
Sebiunouba majabi
An de bugui
An de buididipi**

It’s not a question of witchcraft
That i find him everyday
Wherever I go walking around

Diego’s got coolness
And that Rastafarian afro-gypsy
Sweet spot

And where not a single soul more fits
He goes to get his groove on
Possessed by the ‘ragatanga’ rhythm
And the DJ that knows him
Plays the 12 o’ clock hymn
And for Diego, the song is most anticipated

And he dances it
And he enjoys it
And he sings it….

Asereje ja de je
De jebe tude jebere
Sebiunouba majabi
An de bugui
An de buididipi


*I chose to translate it like that, but the phrase used can mean a lot of things. It can be to do drugs, to dance like there’s no tomorrow, to have fun, to put a lot of effort into something, to drink a lot, etc.

**It’s literally gibberish. If you were wondering what English sounds like to non-English speakers, this is it. There’s speculation that it’s based on the first verse of Rapper’s Delight.

8

Still remember my picture with Syrian kid about couple of week before?

And today,i come again to the same refugees camp. Kem Umm Sirab, Mafraq Jordan.

Look at that little girl. She is Reemas. Reemas looks rimas with me lol. We meet for this second time,and she keep ber-kepit-ing with me all times. Wherever i go,she walks along with me,hold my finger tightly.

Okay itu bukan cerita sebenar post ini dibuat. Ceritanya adalah,aku datang untuk kali kedua ke kem yang sama kalian lihat tempoh hari. Kem Umm Sirab. Kebetulan barangkali,hari ini dunia empat musim hampir mencapai freezing point nya barangkali.

Sejuk hingga ke tulang hingga hari jemari anak kecil ini,yakni Reemas bengkak dan merah akibat sejuk melampau.

Tambahan,mereka tinggal di dalam khemah usang. Berlantai bumi dan berlangitkan atap lubang.

Bisa kalian bayangkan? Sudah pasti tidak kerana nasib mereka tidak pernah terbayang pun. Kita semua akan hidup dalam sangkaan “ah,mereka baik baik sahaja.”

Kan?

..

Maka untuk menderma dan update jumlah bantuan musim sejuk :

Sila rujuk page Tangisan Syria Di Bumi Jordan.

Kalian dan kita semua,bisa mengubah nasib mereka :)

..

Kem Pelarian Syria Umm Sirab,
Mafraq, Jordan.

you carried me gently in your hand
a pocket-sized disciple
nestled within the intricate lines on your palm


I was easy to love and so you loved me
wherever you walked
I was sure to follow


and you knew that all too well
because you walked straight for a cliff
and stopped at the edge


and watched me tumble
down down down
to where all your other followers lay

—  Leigh, day 310

sure, plant life grows behind me wherever i walk and on nearly everything i touch, but do you have any definitive proof that that has anything to do with me? it could be a coincidence? and, on a related note, who doesn’t love marigolds just blooming on the carpet? who would find anything wrong with peach trees sprouting up in the kitchen? who can complain about having actual ivy curtains? don’t worry about it

i keep forgetting im an adult and i can just like go to places without having to ask my mom. like i could just walk wherever i wanted just because i can whats stopping me? crippling depression thats what. you thought this would be a good post

2

Gone are the days wherein I looked upon lighter girls with pointy noses with envy; vanished are the nights in which I quietly sobbed into my sheets because I thought I could never be pretty with dark skin and gone are the times I would try to use filter to lighten up my skin. Today I stand tall wherever I walk. With every day that passes, I find more and more beauty in the skin color I posess. To my fellow dark girls: you are beautiful. You contain galaxies. You hold the whole universe in the palms of your hands. Like Atlas, you carry the weight of this glorified rock we call the earth on your shoulders, and you will forever be the strongest, most beautiful, most astonishing women alive.

ew i had the grossest dream last night i was at the cinemas and when we were leaving my arm was randomly so dry and literally all the skin on my arm was flying off wherever i walked and i had to receive an award and these people were trying to get me ready to get on stage and i was downing alcohol because i was so embarrassed at my arm skin and i walked on stage and everyone gasped and i woke up