wheres the rum at

pssst, emma canonically sailed on the jolly roger before she was even born.

Just A Bad Day

Request:  Hello I love your work btw. Can I get a Harry hook x reader where the reader has an awful day and Harry is her best friend and he cuddles her to make her feel better. After he thinks she has fallen asleep her confesses that he loves her and would never hurt her, but she was awake he entire time and heard it all. As long as it has a very sweet kiss and it’s very fluffy I’ll be very happy

Warnings: Mentions of verbal abuse, swearing, a lot of bad luck, fluffy

Words: 1,165

A/N: I made the reader Governor Ratcliffe’s daughter, but do feel free to adjust the reader’s parentage as you see fit!

Do you ever wonder if some days were just meant to be terrible? Yeah… [Y/N] Ratcliffe was having one of those days. First, she woke up late and had to rush to get ready for school. Once she got to school she realized she forgot her backpack which held everything she needed for the day. Upon her realization of forgetting her backpack, she also realized that she forgot money to get something to eat, so that meant she was likely going to go hungry that day since her brother, Rick, was most likely not going to help her out. 

The worst thing that happened at school was probably when she accidentally spilled ink on Dr. Facilier, which of course would result in either detention or some sort of curse. It was obvious he chose the curse because it wasn’t even five minutes after school ended she ended up slipping into a big mud puddle. 

“Okay, [Y/N],” The girl murmured to herself to try and give herself a pep talk, “you just go home, get ready for work, and things will be okay after that.” She muttered to herself as she entered her home, seeing her father standing there, waiting for her. 

After about five minutes of being screamed at by her father for not picking up her room before she left for school and being called worthless and a no good savage, she headed into her bedroom and quickly picked up so her room was to her fathers liking. “Okay…just work.” She mumbled after getting changed. What could go wrong, she was a waitress. 

Everything could go wrong. The first thing that happened was the dishes hadn’t been done from the day before so that meant she had to spend a good hour doing them herself, getting her clothes soaking wet and filthy and ending up cutting herself on a fork of all things while she did them. Luckily it wasn’t major, but it was annoying. Next, she tripped over an uneven floorboard and accidentally spilled food all over Lady Tremaine, which [Y/N] knew she’d pay for at her next haircut. And last but not least, upon leaving her place of employment, she had to get one good burn from accidentally touching the burner of the oven. 

Instead of heading home where [Y/N] were sure to get yelled at for dirtying her work uniform, she decided to head to her best friend’s house to just vent and maybe relax a bit before taking on the rest of the day. 

“HOOK!” [Y/N] called as she entered the house, there being more clothes on the floor than there was an actual floor, along with pieces of rotten food and empty rum bottles everywhere. Much different from her house, where if there was a single speck of dust, she was in trouble. 

“Shh! Dad’s asleep!” Harry called quietly from his room, motioning for her to come down his way, which she gladly did. “What’s up?” He asked her after shutting the door behind her, able to tell she was stressed. 

“Bad day…can I stay here?” She asked, flopping down on his bed and frowning, wanting just to spend some quality time with her best friend, not wanting to really talk about the details of the day.

Harry frowned and nodded, going over to her and sitting down, putting an arm around her and rubbing her arm. “Of course ye can…want ta lay down, lady?” He asked her, that being his little nickname for her since her father had always expected her to be a lady. After nodding, he gave a nod in understanding and laid down on his bed, shifting some to get comfortable before letting [Y/N] lay down beside him, pulling her close and letting her rest her head on his chest, rubbing her back some. 

Harry was never good at comforting [Y/N], she was fairly emotional and got upset rather easy, but he tried his hardest whenever she was upset to make her feel better. But even his awkward attempts at helping helped. 

The two of them just laid there for a long while, neither of them saying anything, Harry just watching as [Y/N] started to relax and her breathing got heavier, taking that as though she had fallen asleep so he began to just quietly talk to her. 

“Aye, [Y/N]… I’m sorry that ye had a bad day…I wish I knew how I could make it better for ye. Ye deserve ta have nothin’ but the best, and it just breaks me heart ta see ye upset like this…fuck, it just breaks me heart ta know ye get hurt at all. Yer just such a beautiful girl…I’d do anything ta put yer beautiful smile back on yer beautiful face…” Harry whispered softly to her, reaching up with his free hand and brushing some of her hair out of her face. 

“Damn…I wish I had the balls to say this when ye were awake…I just, I don’t know…something about ye…I love ye. That’s it, I just love ye. I’m not good with love, ye know that…it’s not that I don’t care, I just don’t know how ta show it, tis all. Because I care so much. If someone were to hurt ye right in front of me, why they’d meet the wrong end o’ me hook. No one will hurt ye while I’m around…no one. Not even me.” Harry whispered, that last sentence barely audible, gently pressing his lips to her forehead. “I love ye…so much.” He whispered against her forehead, and when he pulled away he noticed a small smile tugging at her lips. “What the…ye little fucker!” Harry said, sitting up and realizing that she had been awake. 

[Y/N] laughed at his sudden outburst, putting her hands over her mouth to keep the noise down and opening her eyes, taking a few moments to just laugh before trying to calm down, sitting up and wiping some tears from her eyes, having laughed so hard she began to cry. After taking a few deep breaths, she chuckled one last time before looking at the obviously embarrassed Harry. 

“Harry Hook, you are so dumb, even for a pirate, you know that?” She asked, but she said it with a smile as she looked at him, and before he could open his mouth to comment back, she leaned in and very gently pressed her lips to his, which caused him to freeze, but he quickly got over it and returned her kiss. The two of them kissed for a solid minute before they had to pull away, the kiss wasn’t heated, but that doesn’t mean it wasn’t passionate. It was just a more intimate passion. 

“[Y/N] Ratcliffe…I love ye.” Harry muttered as he pressed his forehead to hers, and [Y/N] smiled, reaching up to caress his cheek. 

“And I love you, Harry Hook.” She whispered back. Maybe this day wasn’t so bad after all. 

TGIF (m)

∟ When your gift arrives in the mail the morning of another house party, you know wearing it would only make sense. Especially since it is Hoseok’s favorite color. 

・pairing: hoseok x reader
genre: smut, romance, college au
∟warnings: semi-public sex, lingerie, exhibition kink, face fucking, spanking, dirty talk, etc.
word count: 6,575
a/n: this took 4 months but it’s finally done!

Escapades Masterlist

Originally posted by vexedmikxyla

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cs winter hiatus memeCaptain Swan in Season 3A

& just who are you, Swan?
Wouldn’t you like to know?
Perhaps I would.

I don’t want to talk about how much I miss you,
instead I want to count all of the stars in the sky
so I could spend an eternity thinking about something else.
I want to kiss the earth that I walk,
be grateful for my existence at least once,
at least because I exist at the same time as you—
The universe is endless and vast,
yet there are people who don’t think other lifeforms exist.
You are by far the most beautiful lifeform I’ve ever encountered with the loveliest eyes
and I was put on mood stabilizers since you’ve been gone.
You always asked me if I was okay
and I could only ever tell you ‘no’
but never explain.
And I wonder if you’re hurt, if you miss me,
you have to miss me, don’t you?
I’m leaving the country in twenty two days,
and if I wake up in someone else’s bed,
would you hate me?
You would, wouldn’t you?
But I miss you so much and it feels like I’m going to die,
so I’ll make checklists of things to do without you
and I’ll pretend like I’m not waiting for you to come back by kissing other boys and letting their hands roam like yours once did.
And maybe I’ll count the grains of sands on the Honduran beaches
where you’ll find me drinking rum punch
because I was always happier when I wasn’t sober.
And I’ll think about how I’m too fucked up to love
or ever be loved,
and how I can’t sleep anymore,
and somehow convince myself that I’m coping with your absence.
But I can’t say it out loud because it makes it too real,
so I tell everyone that I’m doing fine that you’re gone.
I forgive you, by the way.
For breaking my heart when you promised not to,
but I don’t think you really knew,
you didn’t know that my heart exploded.
I just don’t know when I’ll
forgive myself for missing you.
Never Have I Ever

So this is for my lovely girl and soulmate @aarondingel for her birthday!

So because I am an epic fail this is a nonnie ask from someone else’s dash but I don’t remember who (if you know the post let me know in an ask and I’ll link it) but it was brilliant and it tickled my brain…so here we go…

anonymous asked:

You could never play ‘never have I ever…’ the sex edition with Robron. They’ve had sex everywhere. I bet they’ve even, with some degree of difficulty, done it on their spiral staircase…


Robert wasn’t sure how this had even happened, but somehow the quiet night in he’d planned for him and Aaron had turned into, well… this; Pete, Adam, David and Cain all sitting around the kitchen table in the Mill, chatting away. An odd mix to be sure, but the conversation was light and full of laughter. Windows thrown open and sun rays danced across the titanium surfaces, beers all round. Robert couldn’t stop himself from smiling when he saw Aaron, as he scoffed and gwaffed with Adam over some ridiculous crack.

It was a sight he had missed so much in those months apart. That kind of free happiness in Aaron, was not easily won and even threatened to be nonexistent in Robert’s life for a moment there, but now things were good, really good.

If anyone asked him, Robert couldn’t have said what the group were talking about because everything else faded into the background when he watched his husband light up. He felt his heart stutter and stop for a second as their eyes to met across the room, his smile getting bigger, if that was possible. Aaron pulled a face at his husband, one that said; Thank you, I love you and I’m sorry for these idiots, all in one hit.

No one had ever known him so completely as Aaron. Even though they struggled with their words, sometimes afraid to use them in case they became uncontrollable weapons, in this they were always fluent. Robert could read Aaron like a book and Aaron just got him right back.

Taking another sip of his beer, he crossed one foot over the other and returned his attention to their friends.

“…and when I came home they were all in their pyjamas drinking wine straight from the bottle playing that ‘Never have I ever’ game, you know the one? ” David said, clearly amused by the memory.

“I’ve never played it,” Aaron confessed, shrugging his shoulders.

“What? Mate, really? Never? Oh, we so have to play,” Adam said, his eyes full of dancing glee at the very prospect.

“I’m pretty sure I’m not drunk enough for this,” Robert interjected and he wasn’t at all surprised when Cain grunted in agreement from his perch on a breakfast stool.

“We need shots,” David said, getting up from the table and making his way over to their liquor stash. He gave it a once over before asking, “You got any Whisky?”

“No!” Aaron and Robert both said at the same time and Robert cast his eyes back over his husband to see if his mood had changed but Aaron was still smiling back at him, and Robert felt his own lips twitch in a subtle response.

“Okay, this’ll do,” David said, returning to the table with a mostly full bottle of rum and six shot glasses.

“Well, get on with it then, since you were so eager to play and all,” Aaron said, when they all held a shot of rum in one hand.

“Hmm, okay. Never have I ever…kissed another guy,” Adam said, eyes crinkling in amusement.

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wheres-your-rum  asked:

follower milestone prompt: Kristoff has been wounded by magical means but keeps the truth from Anna - angst please <3

He’d gone into that part of the forest that Grand Pabbie had told him not to, stern warnings over the course of his life that he had only mindlessly nodded at. But when Sven got spooked by some unsuspecting forest creature, Kristoff had no choice but to follow him in.

In retrospect he should have been more careful, shouldn’t have touched anything like Grand Pabbie had warned, but the luminescent insects flitting about captivated him, and as he went to touch one, it suddenly stung. At first, it was no worse than a bee sting, but as time wore on he felt a cold sweat creeping up his spine. Not too long after that, the shivers started.

“Kristoff, are you alright?” Anna had looked up from her book by the fire, at Kristoff who had suddenly stood up from his chair and gone to the fire.

“Fine, Anna.” he fought to stop his teeth from chattering, fought to hide whatever it was that was afflicting him. He extended his hands towards the fire, but even the heat from the flames wasn’t enough to warm him up. He’d tried all the usual remedies they had in the castle kitchens, but none of them worked. Something else was going on.

“Okay then.” Anna looked at him doubtfully, “I’m going to bed then, are you coming?”

“Soon.” he replied as evenly as he could, “I just need to check on Sven.”

She nodded thoughtfully, squeezed his shoulder, then disappeared from the room.

By then, Kristoff’s vision was swimming, and he stumbled out of the castle to the stable. Grand Pabbie was the only one who could help him now, and as he spurred Sven on, he could feel his consciousness slipping. Sven didn’t have time to slow before Kristoff slipped to the ground, his last thought was the touch of his wife’s hand on his shoulder, before the world went black.

#69- Silly, giggly sex (Donna x Jody)

Requested anonymously for my kink list (master list here).

Warning: smut, talk of awkward sexual experiences, dry humping

Word Count: 1850ish

A/N: This is my first femslash ship fic! And I’m not gonna lie, I had a LOT of fun writing it! I hope you all enjoy it as much as I do! XOXO

It’s not like it’s the first time they’ve ever been drunk together. It’s kind of a tradition at this point.

This time, they’re in a motel somewhere in South Dakota, in a town that may not even have a name, about three hours away from Sioux Falls. The victims of their current case of Just Fucking Weird are safe, and everyone appears to have their own arms and legs back, so Jody and Donna have decided to hole up for the night and recover.

Which means a bottle of coconut rum and old sitcoms.

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I wish the “Turn: Washington’s Spies” fandom could all meet at a tavern in Williamsburg, VA (where most of the series was shot and where I live close to :) and drink rum together and watch the new episodes so I could be around people who share my obsession. 


Sanctuary – Ichabod and Abbie knowing they want to open up that rum right now. They also know where drinking a whole bottle of rum in the archives during the holidays would lead. 

This is why we have fan fiction. 

#3: Peter Pan x Reader

“Oh, no you don’t!” you said, grabbing a bottle of rum out of the youngest Lost Boy’s hand. “Beatty, you should know better!”

You stood from where you had crouched by him and looked around. You had been visiting Tinkerbell and when the sun set you had decided to come back to camp. What you saw when you returned completely baffled you. A bonfire blazed in the center of the camp and everyone cheered as the older Lost Boys passed around bottles of an amber drink from wooden crates. You immediately guessed what it was and where they had gotten it.

You approached Rufio, your good friend who also happened to be one of the boys passing out the alcohol. “Rufio, what are you thinking? The pirates will know who took their rum, and if Pan finds out you did this—”

“Relax, Y/N,” Rufio said with a grin. “The pirates have more on their ship, and Pan could care less what we do.”

“Provoking the pirates is something he would care about,” you argued. 

“Y/N, just shut up and have a drink,” Devin snapped at you. “It sounds like you need it.” 

Your grip around the bottle tightened when he said that, and you found yourself fighting to not throw it at him. Instead you turned back to Rufio. 

“Is this really the example you want to set for the younger boys?” you asked him. 

“This isn’t a place where you set examples, Y/N,” Rufio said, uncorking a bottle of rum for himself. “This is a place to have fun, and we discovered a new way to do just that.” 

With that he walked away with the bottle to his mouth, trying to catch up to how much his friends had already been drinking. 

You sighed and looked down at your bottle. Rufio had a point. Neverland wasn’t a place where you had act like a grown up. It was a place to be irresponsible and have the time of your now eternal life. 

“Why not,” you murmured, taking your first sip of the sweet alcohol. Before long you were as drunk as the rest of the boys. They had enough common sense to keep the younger boys away from the rum, but it washed away all the other cares you had in the world. You danced with them around the fire, shouted out songs to the stars, and reveled in the fact that you had all the time in the world to be this happy. 

It was in the latest hours of the night, when you and the boys had lost any signs of sobriety, that Pan and Felix finally joined you. 

They stood at the edge of the clearing, not quite knowing what to make of the scene. Felix looked completely confused while you caught the slightest hint of a smile on Pan’s face. 

You didn’t know what came over you, but that hint of a smile was all that you needed to stand from where you had been sitting at the fire and take confident strides towards Pan. 

“You look like you wanna join in,” you said, holding out your bottle to him. 

Pan cocked a brow at you, surprised by your forwardness. You normally only spoke to him when he spoke to you, too terrified of him to say anything. In the beginning it was because you were intimidated by him. He was the leader of the Lost Boys and he made sure they knew it, punishing those who doubted or defied him without a second thought. That was the side of him that the boys could see, but you saw more. You knew he cared about the boys and wanted them to have a better life here, and the way he ruled the island was how he ensured that you all could have that. After awhile your fear turned to a sort of admiration that you kept to yourself, ignoring the feelings for him that grew by the day. In your drunken haze, though, you had decided that secrets were overrated.

Pan hadn’t made a move to take the bottle from you, so you drank some more. “That’s fine. More for me.”

“You look like you’ve had enough,” Pan said, looking to Felix as he finally let the smile break through. 

“You can never have enough fun,” you said with a playful grin. “That’s what we’re supposed to be doing, right? Living without a care in the world for all eternity?”

“You can say that.” You got the sense that he wasn’t taking you seriously, that he was just watching a poor drunk girl make a fool of herself and enjoying every second of it. 

“You know, you’re a real prick sometimes,” you said as you threw back the rest of your rum. If any other boy said that to him, Pan would have already had a punishment for them before they were finished speaking, but in this state of mind, you couldn’t care less. “You know a lot of times I wonder why I even bother with you. You took me from my home. You boss me around all the time. Sometimes you’re the only thing that gets in the way of this being the perfect place to be. Half the time I wonder if I even belong here.” 

“I think it’s time you turned in for the night, Y/N,” Pan said, a warning in his voice, but you didn’t heed it. You hadn’t finished what you were trying to say. 

“The night is young,” you crowed. “And we will be too for a long time, so I’m just going to get this over with.”

You dropped your empty bottle, took his face in your hands, and kissed him. 

You were vaguely aware of the sudden silence in the clearing, but you didn’t care that everyone’s eyes were on you. You had been silent long enough. 

You pulled away from Pan, laughing at his expression. You had stunned him into speechlessness. 

“You’re a prick,” you repeated. “But I love you anyway.”

Pan smiled at me. It wasn’t one of his signature smirks or sly grins. It was a genuine smile, and it told me all I needed to know. He had been waiting for me to do that for a long time. 

“You really amaze me sometimes,” he said to me. “Every day you remind me what makes our time here worth it. If we’re going to be here forever, there’s no one else I’d rather be with.” 

6 Sarcastic Guys’ Conversation.

6 SARCASTIC GUYS’ CONVERSATION (SEVERAL FANDOMS CROSSOVER): Fanfic? (because I wanted to write this ever since I saw a post similar to this)

Who’s in the house?

-  House

-  Jack Sparrow

-  Tony Stark

-  Sherlock

-  Dean Winchester

-  …?

What do they have in common?

(You don’t have to know all of the characters)

Narcissism, sarcasm, some are genius’, most are experts in their work, all of them have drinking/drug dependencies, most have childhood issues and are secretly full of angst, etc.

Summary: This is just them, trapped in a room together, with no idea how they got there or how to get out. There may be more characters to come…

Warnings: Not much, a bit of swearing.

Comments are well appreciated (nice comments, helpful comments etc.)

Part 1

Jack: Now, the real question remains: Where is the rum?

House glared at him.

House: That’s not the real question, dumbass. I wanna know what the hell we’re doing here.

Tony: Maybe it’s a house party.

Sherlock is bent down by the door, his nose alarmingly close to the floor.

Tony: Ok, curly, what’re you doing now?

Sherlock looks up frowning, realising he’s being addressed.

Sherlock: I’m checking to see what substances there are in order to determine where we are, which is a lot more than any of you lot are doing.

Tony: *huffs* Well, excuse me, princess-

House: There’s no way of getting out of here.

House is sat by the window, and everyone looks up to him. He motions to the window with his cane.

House: These windows are fake. That door is impenetrable, the walls are made with considerable strength, as we’ve found out, and none of us geniuses have any idea why we’re here, where we are, how we got here, or who sent us here.

Everyone was quiet.

Jack: Well, I for one, am not a genius – just to clarify.

Sherlock sighs and sits up against the wall.

Tony: Find anything?

Sherlock: No. There’s no evidence, no substances, no clues – just nothing.

He looked sullenly ahead.

Tony: Well, my Iron Man suit should be here anytime now.

Sherlock: It’s not going to work…

Tony screwed his eyes at him.

Tony: Well, I don’t think your ‘sniffing around’ is exactly doing to much to solve this problem either-

Jack: Ok, ok, ladies, lets settle down, shall we? Look, we only have each other in this neat room of ours, and if we start fighting, it all goes downhill from there, and frankly, I think we’d all know who would be the only one standing after that.

Jack smiled smugly to himself.

House sighs and mutters something like ‘imbecile’.

Jack: What was that now?

Sherlock looked over as House sighs, and rubs his leg with his hand, his cane to the side.

Tony: What happened to you?

House looks up and replies sarcastically: I tripped.

Tony: Well don’t get your knickers in a twist, Doc, I was only asking.

Sherlock: He got shot.

House looked over to him.

House: How the hell do you know that?

Jack: Oh, God, don’t ask him for an explanation, I’m beggin’ you.

Sherlock: Well, it’s clear from the way he holds his leg that he’s in obvious pain-

Jack: Here we go..

Sherlock, ignoring the interruption: and he’s used to it according to the heavy bags under his eyes from sleepless nights, and he’s bitter, a sign of long-lasting pain, so why wouldn’t you do something about it? Well, it’s obvious he’s tried drugs-

House: Shut the hell up.

Sherlock: – takes one to know one – but they didn’t work out, did they? Got too dependent on them, so now you just have to take the pain – and by yourself – I mean, it’s obvious that you’re lonely.

House stands up with his cane: I said SHUT UP!

He went over to Sherlock and squared up to him.

Tony and Jack looked at each other wide-eyed.

House: You think you’re some big genius, who can just figure everyone out by one look-

Sherlock: Well, yea, pretty much-

But suddenly there was a big BANG as the door came flying inwards.
They all shielded themselves as the door was smashed down and smoke covered them, some of them coughing, as Sherlock quickly walking over the new body that was now on the floor, coughed through the smoke and went through the door, just to see another door a few feet behind it.

Sherlock: Dammit.

House looked around.

House: Everyone alright?
Jack: Just dandy

House grimaced as he put his cane down and knelt to the man on the floor, turning him onto his back so they could see him, Tony kneeling next to him.

Tony: You know him?

House: Nope.

House leant down to check the man’s breathing, when suddenly he snapped up and looked around frantically, his golden necklace swaying across his chest.

Man: What the hell – oh, son of a bitch.

He held onto his head, wincing slightly and cursed to himself.

House: What’s your name? Do you know how you got here?

Sherlock and Jack crowded round to listen.

Man: Name’s Dean Winchester. And I have no clue, man.

Whimsicallyenchantedrose’s 1.5K follow forever

About a week ago I hit another follower milestone—1.5 K!  Thank you to everyone who’s hit the “follow” button.  I appreciate every one of you!  Stay tuned; there will be a 2nd thank coming up in a day or two!

*URL’s in bold are mutual. URLS in italics are the people I talk to the most.


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anonymous asked:

drunk Eddie headcanons? (can u imagine what a lightweight he'd be? also also Richie taking care of him and taking him home and tucking him in??)

  • eddie is literally the epitome of “oh, honey, no” when hes drunk
  • he gets really pissy when everyone says hes a lightweight
  • one time when he’d only been out drinking like. 3 times + bev called him a lightweight he snatched a bottle of vodka out of her hands n ‘chugged’ it
  • its basically like that kid that was like “we’re gonna drink this vodka down the hatch”
  • he didnt remember the rest of the night
  • turns out he lasted for about an hour: he got up to go to the toilet and fell over n passed out
  • after that he stuck exclusively to fruity cocktails
  • bc of that everyone calls him “vodka aunt” n he hates them
  • after hes had two (2) drinks hes all giggly and lazy
  • when hes had three (3) hes Ready To Fight
  • when hes had four (4) he cries
  • when hes had five (5) hes horny as fuck
  • its basically like six drink amy from brooklyn nine nine
  • does all the harmonies when they do karaoke
  • asked mike to carry him on his back one time n cried when mike said no
  • (after that he said yes every time)
  • got too drunk on graduation and had too many shots + rum (no one had rum where did he find it)
  • he sways up to richie + tries to flirt with him
  • richies like holy shit finally
  • eddie pukes on his shoes
  • they leave the party early n richie drives him home, he didnt drink all night bc he heard eddie say earlier he wanted to get “fuckin shitfaced!!!!”
  • richie takes him to bed, tucks him in and leaves painkillers + water by the bed with a lil note
  • “cant wait to tell you what you did last night - you owe me new shoes. love, rich xoxo”