my mom was watching fox news last night and they were talking about baltimore. and i shit you not they actually said “no one has been killed, but a lot of the officers were hurt”
but what about the hundreds of black folks who have been hurt? especially the ones who have been hurt by law enforcement? what about the ones who have been brutally beaten by the law enforcement you cry a river over being hurt? what about those who have died? who have been murdered? what about vonderrit? elearnor bumpers? kathryn johnson? what about eric garner? what about aiyana jones? what about mike brown? tyisha miller? what about trayvon martin? what about their families? what the fuck about them, fox news? where are your reports on them?
get your heads out of your asses you pasty ass old fucks im fucking sick of this
are you worried someone might see you as problematic? do you think you're problematic?
I dunno man, somebody probably thinks I’m problematic. There’s a lot of levels to it.
I sincerely, genuinely love Tumblr. I think it’s a great place for members of oppressed, marginalized or underrepresented minority groups (POCs, LGBTQIAs, etc) to find and craft a safe space where they can be themselves and thrive. However, I also think that since they’re trying so hard to create a safe space they can often JUMP to attack someone who presents an opposing view or even presents a similar view but doesn’t fit into their group.
It leads to a lot of issues and misunderstandings.
For instance, any time a post I make about racism and it gets pretty big, I get a few replies like “here we go, white boy chiming in” before I have to calmly explain that 1, I’m 100 percent Puerto Rican and 2, I may have “passing privilege” because people assume I’m white but passing privilege doesn’t mean shit when the old white dude at your job interview hears your last name is Diaz.
Or, any time I post something about gay rights and I have to get some kind of “nobody wants your straight opinion ally, stay in your lane” and I have to awkwardly fumble out “hey I’ve been finding out over the past year that I’m actually not straight and i’m struggling to figure it out but thanks for helping me feel like more of an outsider”
or any time I post something about body positivity and somebody sees it as an excuse to say “YEAH BODY POSITIVE FUCK THOSE SKINNY CHICKS REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES”
And keep in mind, this isn’t about me saying “wah let me play on your team,” the point is that all of these marginalized groups are being pushed down by aspects of society and culture, and the more that we fight amongst ourselves and draw lines by saying “they have a similar opinion but not quite” or “they have an opinion kind of like mine but don’t appear to fit in this group” we continue to stifle progress. As long as we fight amongst ourselves, we can’t attack those who are actually trying to keep us down.
A lot of the people who have written me off as problematic just haven’t taken the five seconds it takes to figure out “oh he’s talking about racism because he’s dealt with it because he isn’t white” or “oh he’s talking about feminism because he was a misogynist for years without knowing it and he wants to help others continue to educate people about it”
It’s just ridiculous.
The truth is, everybody is a little problematic because we’re all different people with differing opinions, and that’s okay.
I mean it’s not okay if you’re problematic because you’re like, a sexual predator or a racist, but unfortunately nobody really is a beautiful cinnamon bun too good for this world. Everyone has issues and things that offend other people that they might not even be aware of.
I just found out a few months ago that the term “being jipped” is actually offensive, because it’s a slur about the Romani people (sometimes referred to as “gypsies”) who were commonly seen as cheap, untrustworthy scam artists.
How the fuck was I supposed to know that? I’ve never met someone who was Romani, and it was something my childhood friends said for years. But once I found that out, I stopped saying it. It’s that simple. You can see problematic behavior and address it without making it into a huge deal.
I don’t honestly believe I do anything too problematic, but there’s just shit I can’t know about. I’m a body positivity advocate and I like going out and partying and drinking and smoking and (before my current relationship obviously) having casual one night stands whenever possible. I’m sure there’s people who will have problems with that, but I don’t see anything wrong with the way I live my day-to-day life. I work hard, I try and help people and I unwind the way I like to.
It’s also really difficult to not see anyone as problematic because if you hear about something they’ve said/done but don’t continue to follow up on them, you have no idea about their progress.
The issue with the internet age is that there’s a permanence to everything. If you’re in your 40s and you smoked pot in college and somebody took a polaroid of you, you can just hide that picture or burn that shit up and nobody will ever know, aside from the people involved.
In 20 years, if someone is running for president I guarantee there will be at least one situation where a Fox News anchor says “Possible Democratic candidate James Whatshisnuts smoke marijuana in college, according to this tweet that his roommate’s girlfriend posted from her iPhone in 2009.”
There’s a permanence to everything you say, do or are even tangentially swept up in because it all stays online forever, and that’s very intimidating.
There are people who’ve sent me anonymous messages writing me off as problematic or calling me a fraud, because they’re saying that they’ve found videos or tweets or whatever of me using the word “faggot” or using “rape” as a joke or making jokes about women “staying in the kitchen”
and like, yeah, that’s all fucked up, but guess what? I admit that. I’m ashamed of it, but it all happened and I’m not going to act like it didn’t.
I used “faggot” as an insult and made rape jokes in my videos, and made jokes about women needing to make sandwiches, but it was when I was SIXTEEN in 2009 and had NO IDEA what the problems with that were because I WASN’T EDUCATED YET.
I’ve said SEVERAL times that if you ever find one of these videos, find them and I’ll remove them from the internet because I fucking hate them and I think they’re problematic and I don’t want someone to see them and think that’s it’s acceptable, let alone GOOD COMEDY.
And guess what? Once I realized it was a dick move, I acknowledged it was a dick move, addressed that it was a dick move and made a point to not make said dick move again. That’s what PROGRESS is. That’s what LEARNING is. We don’t all start out feminist lgbtqia allies, that’s shit we pick up along the way and if we continue to harass people who’ve transitioned into allies and supporters and members of those communities they marginalized while they were young and stupid, we’re never going to be able to make progress.
I’m not saying if someone is a reformed nazi rapist we should let them into the social justice club, I’m just saying that if someone has been an asshole in the past, admits that they’ve been an asshole and promises and subsequently delivers on the promise to not be an asshole anymore, maybe cut them slack about shit they were oblivious to before they were able to learn.
“Ginsburg’s comments inspired comical levels of umbrage-taking on The Five on Fox News, where Andrea Tantaros worked herself into full-blown "misandry!” mode. ‘Isn’t she sort of saying, 'Keep men away from this court?“ she complained. 'I get it. she’s a fan of birth control, but she is an enemy to the Bill of Rights.’”
A couple messages to the antis. Because I’m sick and fucking tired of these people and I’m done with being nice. I’m done with trying to do fandom 101s to them. I’m done with mean messages. I’m done with lies. I’m done with their bullshit defense of their unusually ridiculous fucking behavior.
Number one, to the Queen Bee, to Purv: Your defense that what you’re doing isn’t wrong because there are websites like X17, RadarOnline, JustJared, whatever that do the same thing as you? Wow. Wow.
Those sites? They’re shitheads. There isn’t a single celebrity on the planet who appreciates them. Maybe you’ve missed this, but celebrities have tried to have laws passed so that those sites don’t dig into their lives. Saying, “It’s okay that I’m a stalkery shithead because hey, at least I’m in the company of other shitheads” DOESN’T MAKE YOU A NOT SHITHEAD. Two wrongs don’t make a right. And hey, thanks for admitting you’re a liar because 9/10, those sites get it so fucking wrong. So so so fucking wrong. They LIE and everyone knows it.
Also, if it were just that you were making up stories and saying you have sources, I wouldn’t give two shits about you. You’d be a blip on the radar of bullshit coming down from the same Bullshit Mountain where Fox News and Donald Trump live. No one would care. You’d be a liar and that would be that. It’s the fact that you have endlessly and clearly harassed people. It’s the fact that you’ve been thrown off Twitter for that behavior. It’s the fact that you think having “sources” and lying has made you some kind of queen. It’s the fact that you have followers who have made you their queen. It’s the fact that you have made it okay for all of the worst personalities of trolls to come out in normal every day people. THAT’S why I think you’re a giant bag of shit. One of my friends is a Twilight fan, we had her scroll through your blog and she had you pegged as the giant shithead who pulled the same shit over there. You keep doing it and for some reason, the Outlander fandom has accepted you with open arms. It’s disgusting. And at first, I wondered why, but now I’m wondering if these are the same people who would vote for Donald Trump and I’m past trying to figure out those people. Some people just really like the taste of bullshit.
To the so-called psychiatrist who uses words like crazy and delusional…you’re not a mental health professional. I’ve been dealing with mental health professionals for over fifteen years, and even my psychiatrist who lost his license for fucking his patients would never let me use the word crazy to describe myself. None of them told me I was crazy. None of them made me feel bad for my mental illness.
You consistently suggest that a girl on this site is mentally ill. Consistently. If you were a mental health professional and actually BELIEVED that, you would reach out to her privately and ask if she were okay, ask if there was anything you could do. Ten years ago, a social worker did that for me in the HP fandom. She noticed that I was online a lot, that I complained a lot about my life, and reached out to ask me if I was okay. I was in college and too busy to see a therapist and had gone off my meds…she helped me PRIVATELY on a daily basis to deal with the mental breakdown I had. She didn’t call me out, she didn’t say I was crazy when I was on the site for hours and hours at a time. She talked to me every single day, so that I would have someone to talk to. If you really believed the shit you spew about how “sick” shippers are, you would reach out to them and offer help. Not bully them.
Because a person who actually is mentally ill? That kind of bullying could lead to him or her making a really permanent decision. As a mental health professional, you would know that. And you’d waste less time writing “essays” that apparently young people are too dumb to read (go fuck yourself, I had a college reading level at the age of nine. I don’t read your shit because it’s stupid and it reeks of someone who doesn’t know what the fuck they’re talking about) and you’d actually want to HELP people. Not hurt them further.
Oh, and your detente? Seriously? A relaxing of relations? Thanks, I was a political science major before a creative writing major and I know what that means. People don’t use that word that way by the way. But also, why are you relaxing strained relations with a bully and a person who, quite obviously, exhibits some serious symptoms of a narcissistic personality disorder (did I mention I minored in psychology in order to better understand my own illness?) and is a stalker? Why on earth would you want any kind of agreement with a person like that? A person who encourages bullying at every turn? Who digs into a person’s private life in a way that makes me highly uncomfortable? Why?
IF you’re a psychiatrist, I sincerely hope you show your patients more empathy and less judgment than you show anyone on here. Because your behavior is so disgusting and so horrible that I really do wonder.
To antis as a whole, if Sam and Cait are REALLY just doing this for PR and it’s all fake…then do you realize that you are saying they are acting? Putting on a show for the purposes of being shipped together? That the people we see aren’t real, but a caricature of the real people? And if that’s the case, then this is just fantasy, across the board. It hurts no one, especially since the fantasy is provided for us, given to us for our pleasure. And if Sam and Cait were REALLY against people shipping them, they would put a stop to it. They would tell PR that they aren’t comfortable with it and PR would stop. PR doesn’t rule celebrities, they don’t make end all be all decisions for them.
Oh, and all shippers are not the same. I don’t think Cait is pregnant. I don’t think Sam and Cait are married. I don’t agree with Jess and Puffy on about half of what they say. Do I think certain people go a bit too far sometimes in the shipper side of fandom? Yes, yes I do. I thought that five hundred times today. But I’m letting them do what they want because it’s healthy. It’s expected. It’s accepted.
You want all the shippers to denounce Jess and Puffy? I have nothing to denounce them over, at all. Their shipping behavior isn’t concerning to me. How about you fuck nuggets denounce Purv? How about you guys decide not to send asks that involve calling someone a piece of shit, or telling them to kill themselves, or saying they’re fat and ugly? Why don’t you guys denounce those people? Why don’t you guys just decide to actually stay in your own lane?
And maybe look into why you’re anti something you don’t believe in. I’m not anti-Santa, I just don’t believe in him. I’m not anti-Rudolph the red nosed reindeer, I just don’t believe in him. But I don’t run through the streets shouting at kids, “HE’S NOT REAL YOU ASSHOLES. NONE OF THIS IS REAL AND YOU’RE ALL IDIOTS HAHAHAHAHAHAHA.”
And if someone showed me proof that Santa, aliens, or a kind anti could actually be real…I would celebrate that. I wouldn’t be anti any of it. Anti means you’re against something, and you can’t be anti something that doesn’t exist.
I’m anti Donald Trump. I’m anti racism and misogyny and religious persecution. I’m anti Nazis. I’m anti assholes. Those are all real things.
Stay in your own fucking lanes and leave us all alone.
Now, I’ll just wait for the attacks I’m about to get and the followers I’m about to lose. Which is fine. I’m sick of this shit.
this thanksgiving I’m thankful that my little brother isn’t racist scum despite living at home without me in a house where Fox News is literally always on and where racist opinions are encouraged and any other opinions are silenced